#still hate putting in flats tho. legit the worst part of art

[saimincoatl]

Most of the time I’m in a Lineart mood but rn I’m fully in RENDERING mode where my brain wants to paint but DOES NOT want to draw so I keep going thru old sketches and trying to find smth I can Finish

[lcncastersarchive-blog]

am I finally here?/?????/ // / /ye a ? ok hi, i’m d, i’m 23, and i’m from the eastern timezone. they/them. i’m a mess so like, y’know, honey, u got a big storm comin

so kai is my fave character and kinda notoriously The Worst while also being The Best, so i’m warning y’all before we even go in that he’s actually so sloppy and wild pls proceed w/ caution. i’ve been playing him for almost 4 years (his “birthday” is march 23rd) and like actual shout-out to chloe who i evidently wrote with on him in indie 2 years ago u got me shook ily tho

now 2 the good part?? which is basically the disorganized horror of me trying to condense him into bullet points. i have a massive STATS FRAMEWORK right there, and his bio can be clicked through from that point as well. if you’re really hating yourself tonight, you can look at my DEVELOPMENT tag too which is pretty much a compilation of useless facts that not 1 single person asked for. anyway.

TW FOR TERMINAL ILLNESS/CANCER, SUBSTANCE ABUSE MENTIONS, ABLEISM, & MENTIONS OF SELF-HARM/SUICIDE.

kai was born into a pretty posh, old-money typea family in manchester, uk. like i’m talking on his mothers side they’re all doctors, lawyers, scholars, etc, etc, and on his dad’s side entrepeneurs. his parents themselves built a fairly large business from the ground up together that now goes by the name of lancaster industries. their current biggest venture and pretty much what they’ve built the whole of their fortune on is a chain of luxury hotels that you can find basically in every major city in the world.

he had 3 younger sisters who he essentially raised considering his parents were too busy to be around during their childhood. only two of them are still living, his youngest sister having passed a couple years ago at the age of 7 from leukemia.

his mother is literally the devil? kai always hated school/struggled in it for a multitude of reasons, not the least of which were his not diagnosed adhd and his dyslexia, which he never got the help he probably needed for. he’s always kinda just thought he was extremely stupid, and that idea was reinforced by the way his mother always used to tell him the very same thing. “think harder, kai. use your brain.” is a phrase that’s essentially been reinforced so many times in his head, he p much hears her voice ringing in his ears every time he gets so much as vaguely confused now. 

that being said, despite how he struggled in school, he was always a very vibrant, kind, charismatic, and magnetic young person. he tends to draw people into him with his silly nature and upbeat attitude, and he’s kind of the Eternal Optimist, so he was fairly popular when he was attending. to say he has eccentricities would be putting it lightly, and he’s loud, never seeming to run out of things to say or fail to command the interest of the room.

anyway things with his mum only got worse in his relationship with her when he barely managed to complete his a levels by the skin of his teeth (and with an absurd amount of tutoring), and then refused to go to the university of her choosing. she p much wanted him to “get his shit together” so he could take over the family business someday, but i am not kidding when i say kai would wilt away and probably legit just die if he had to work in a place like that forever -- and that’s assuming he even got through business school in the first place. 

his father was always a push-over and sort of was absent/bent to her will when he was around, so he didn’t bother to defend kai when his mother decided 2 cut him off from everything and essentially ex-communicate him once she realised he was refusing 2 be manipulated and forced into shit anymore.

that was at age 18, and by that point he had plans to move out and travel to london with his best mate anyway, so he was basically like “peace out” and got the hell out of dodge. he still harbours a lot of guilt for abandoning his younger sisters, particularly so considering his youngest one fell ill so soon after his departure.

he lives, breathes, and sleeps piano. music as a whole is something he’s passionate about, having taken the time to develop his somewhat unorthodox voice, but the way his fingers fly over the ivories is a living art form more than it is anything. it’s how he communicates, how he speaks his deepest truth and just like? put those feelings out there into the world that he otherwise wouldn’t be able to articulate in the common vernacular.

so what he wants to do with his life is to just? talk to people? through his music? to play for them and the be in front of a crowd every night and to feel the energy of them, to command them with his presence and to exist with them in that way. he almost gets high off of it? he’s been playing small shows since age nineteen with his band, but since he moved to america he obvi hasn’t had them and has been on his own.

SORRY I’M REALLY TRYING TO CONDENSE THIS so ok basically he was in love w this girl from the time they were 14. they lost their virginity 2 each other, they were on & off all through HS, & then through to age 20 after he moved away and all that. she was v v ill and struggled with mental illness and kai tried his best 2 take care of her, but he was always in over his head despite his dedication to like making her feel OKAY. she needed help that he could not give 2 her, and they ended up breaking up & him letting her go at the end. she died soon after that, and it remains unclear 2 him whether or not it was a suicide. it was officially ruled as an “accident”, but he knows better.

after that he got involved with this boy who was a substance abuser, addicted to H to b exact, and for a while he thought that he was getting better and they were building off of each other, building a healthy life together. the fact he called kai his “new addiction” was probably never a good thing, but kai didn’t recognize that at the time. they got engaged eventually, and kai was 100% convinced that he was the actual love of his life after caro. of course, in the end, it wasn’t built to last, and when it went bad, it went really bad. kai eventually felt like there was a chasm several miles deep between them, and he had no hope of getting to the other side again. he broke it off.

THIS NEXT ONE IS KINDA AN OPTION CONNECTION OKAY SO IF ANY1 IS INTERESTED PLS PLS LMK!!!

kai has been posting vids on YT of him covering song on his YouTube for like actual years, and when he was around 21 he met this person via the comments section on one of them. they seemed to be quite the fan of his interpretation of some of the songs he chose to play. they ended up talking more and more as time went on, exchanging contact information, and grew very very very close.

that was the start of the LDR that is what brought him to america/to wilson in the first place. they were together for about eight months and had seen each other in person three times for a total of about 3 weeks before he made the decision to get started on his visa and move to the states. the moment he was able to, he crossed the pond and moved in w them!!

strain on their relationship was created when at first kai was unable to find work and contribute to the bills and the household funds. they lived in a tiny flat, and going from barely seeing each other to having each other all at once and all the time was a lot. within six months of his arrival, they broke up, and kai moved out.

he couch surfed w some friends he’d met 4 a while, and eventually found a decent paying job as a nanny for a well off family. he also plays the occasional smol show at the lantern when he can (!!!!)

he’s still working on getting his full citizenship though he’s v v v close 2 it & has been lowkey getting help from his cousin w paying for the process so!!

THAT’S BASICALLY IT

last but not least IM REALLY FUCKING SORRY  ICOULDN’T MAKE THIS SHORTER I JUST HAVE A LOT OF THOUGHTS AND fEELIGNSA

please LIKE THIS if you wanna plot with kai and i’ll slide into your DM’s

[scadaz]

Harry Potter for the changes post

ONLY 5??? okay nah i got this

okay i dont actually got this this is too long so im putting it under a cut

1) first and foremost make the inexplicit explicit. make dumbledore explicitly gay. make hermione explicitly black. at the very least the things that she has confirmed or alluded to in the aftermath of releasing the books and at the most like…everything. maybe explore the way that race plays into the worldbuilding of the wizarding world rather than just make an allegory for it. explore how harry being biracial places him in the world and how the different sides of his life (dursleys vs the wizards) view him and his heritage. put more young queer romances in there. maybe the reason ron is so jealous isn’t just because he likes hermione but ALSO because he ALSO likes krum and is really confused about his feelings?? replace the whole lavender romance with a dude and let lavender and parvati run off together like they were always meant to. let trans kids exist in hogwarts!!! you know what would have made ginny’s whole “arc” a lot more bearable?? if she’d been a trans girl learning to overcome her shyness and gain confidence in herself as she puts herself out there into the hogwarts-sphere. just generally opening up the worldbuilding and characters to more accurately reflect the world in comparison to well...what it was......also maybe like don’t rely on real world stereotypes l i k e..........

2) make the characters who are supposed to be likable actually likable. like....i know the marauders have a huge fanbase and everyone loves them but there isn’t really much to love in the canon??? imho. they’re super huge dicks when they were younger and we hardly get to see any transition from them learning how to be better people or having regret in the way that they acted before. we’re only supposed to believe it because they’re good to each other (ie learning how to be animagi to support their bud lupin) and we’re just told they’re good when they’re older and that’s the end of that. so how i would change it is including more scenes of james, sirius, and lupin growing older and acting like better people. since its from harry’s perspective this can be done through sirius and lupin sharing stories or again having some more regretful reflection on their younger years. also give wormtail more nuance?? is he at all regretful for turning on his friends, does he have second thoughts, maybe he tries to make things right in the end?? i know the “he was only in gryffindor because he valued bravery and everything gryffindor was despite not being it himself” but like it would be cool if there was something more....idk wormtail couldve been a more nuanced character......

3) speaking of possible redemption arcs tho how about some actual redemption arcs?? first we have draco, who despite having multiple hints of having a sweeping redemption arc the whole thing just sort of....falls flat. idk i dont really pay much attention to dracos character and there are people who could speak to this way better than i could go look at their meta.but then snape. SNAPE!!!! undoubtedly the worst character in the series and the bane of my existence. the worst part is he really COULD have been the ‘villain-but-not-really-he-was-good-all-along’ character jkr wanted to be if we just changed some pretty fucking major things his character in his character. first like....don’t....make him a child abuser??? its really that simple!!! don’t abuse children!!!!! like he could have just been a stern and surly teacher who yeah is maybe too strict and is maybe an asshole but also doesn’t like. fucking abuse children because of his own vendettas. IT’S NOT HARD like children/teens always think teachers are out to get them when their teachers are just kind of dicks it could have easily been just that without snape doing a ton of the awful shit he did. like remember when they saw snape muttering when harry’s broom was going nuts so they just assumed he was evil and doing it himself when really he was just trying to be a good guy??? more of that. like the whole thing.second like make his love for lily a legit and motivating thing rather than the creepy stalkerish thing it became. maybe instead of snape being the one to tell voldemort the prophecy so that he can kill james and harry (wtf????????!!!!!!!!!) he overhears someone else tell voldemort the prophecy and begs voldemort to spare them (yeah ALL of them!!!! because even tho hes a salty salamander he still wouldn’t wish death upon those who makes lily happy because that’s!!!! what love is!!!!!) . and when he doesn’t that’s when he realized he fucked up and joined the wrong side. and then actually looks out for harry growing up. like maybe he can’t bring himself to be a full fatherly figure because he’s still an asshole but he doesn’t actively go out of his way to be a huge dick to harry just because he’s bitter that lily had a child with someone else. and in the end when he gives his memories it shows all the moments where harry thought snape was being a dick but actually behind the scenes he was doing all he could to protect and push harry along on his journey because he loved lily and hates himself for the way he treated her and he also loves harry and you know stuff that could play into the whole love thing without being a creepy vindictive abusive stalker!!!!i hate canon snape not just because he’s the worst but because he could’ve been written to be the actually good character he’s framed to be.

4) a better approach to houses!!!! like i get its told from harrys perspective so of course Gryffindor Is The Best but like. it is soooo easy to make the houses more nuanced and balanced look at every piece of fanfic and rp ever (okay thats obviously hyperbole but still. point is it aint hard). maybe add more characters to each house!! i get its easier to just have the golden trio all be gryffindor but how interesting would it have been to have them scattered across the houses but still manage to become friends. and yeah maybe some slytherins can be jerks but also maybe thats just how harry sees it because the first slytherin he met was a piece of shit!!! but there are tons of good slytherins and maybe some join dumbledore’s army or hell at least come back for the battle of hogwarts!!!! and then there can be plenty of death eaters who come from all across the house spectrum. hufflepuffs who are undyingly loyal to voldemort. ravenclaws who love learning about the dark arts. gryffindors who would absolutely sacrifice themselves for their dark cause. like. its so easy. its soooooo easy. and then there would be equal merch of all the houses across the spectrum and people would be able to be proud of their houses without having to justify “yeah well not all slytherins are evil!!! hufflepuffs can be cool look at cedric!!!!! ravenclaws care about more than just getting good grades!!!!!”it’s so easy. im so mad.

5) STOP!!!!!! just. stop the fucking series. of course rewrite the epilogue to show not everyone being Straight Married With Children but how the war affected them. maybe it be a couple months or a couple years after everything and yeah maybe you can make some couples canon if you really want but thats not what i would do personally. show that they’re struggling but they’re surviving. they’re there for each other. use it to drive home a few of the main themes.and then just STOP!!!!!!!! NO MORE!!!!!!! like yeah maybe pottermore could be used to post some cute little quips that expand background characters and fill in plot holes that couldn’t be explained in the books. we learn more about professor’s histories, maybe some cool worldbuilding about stuff that was sort of mentioned but just!!!! no cursed child!!!!! no fantastic beasts!!!!! no making up shit for countries and cultures that you barely know about and don’t feel like researching or being actually respectful towards!!!!!!!!! let the fans do all of that for you stop putting your foot in your mouth and milking the cash cow!!!!!! just!!!!!!!!! STOP!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

anyway that was a horrible ramble that isn’t actually all that well thought out nor did i reread it but take it anyway my lovely followers