Virginia: Day 2
DAVENFORTH: -Here they are, on the road. The trees wiz by as Takoda rolls them along. Davenforth is awake right now, watching the scenery and trying to figure out exactly what the fuck is going on while a cold fish cuddles and snoozes on while being covered in various warming apparel-
MAYOR: -chewing on a delicious seat-
HIGHBLOOD: =The warm smell of a hot, fresh banana cream pie slowly seeps from the back=
RILEY: -she awakens to the smell of banana cream pie, opening her eyes from a snoring and drooling deep sleep against derek. she sits up and tiredly looks around for the source-
HIGHBLOOD: =its him, or rather the pie on the little table he's got propped up over his lap. A bowl of sliced bananas next to it, he lays the slices gently on the whipped surface of the pie=
DAVENFORTH: -Grumbles something about "clown magic" -
QIRIN: =Softest of tummy gurgles.=
QIRIN: =Gently places a hand over her own face.=
MAYOR: -all you SUCKERS can get hungry over pies if you want. It's not even green?-
HIGHBLOOD: =he might have green pies, who knows=
DAVENFORTH: -He really wouldn't recommend eating a juggalo party bus seat. Do you know what's been on these things?-
PENNY: -wakes up next to the mayor and groaaans. She is not feeling too hot right now. Also reaches over and tries to push the Mayor away from his seat eating.- dude no thats so gnarly.
DAVENFORTH: Marinated in sex sweat and faygo
GAIZKA: =Sleeping Meditating under a pile of those fuzzy rainbow robes. Legs kickied up against the side wall of the bus. Flicks an ear.= GAIZKA: only MoThErFuCkInG marinade WhAt will Do. =Tired bemused mumbling.=
QIRIN: Ugghhghghg
HIGHBLOOD: =Gaizka better be in the back with him= amen on that shit usual but nastyass blaspheme soaked up in it my motherfucker
DAVENFORTH: Still salty about that huh
DAVENFORTH: You know its not a religion on earth its more of a cult
DAVENFORTH: One condy probably brought here
MAYOR: ? -offers a handful of gross chair stuffing to penny-
HIGHBLOOD: =quirks eyebrow= .... one ought have words and extremities for her if that so be the realness, ain't too farfetched
GAIZKA: =If the back is where one has room for two 9 feet+ clowns then in the back he is. He hums.= stray souls in NeEd of some GuIdIn' AsSiSt or so it go. be So HiThEr, DiThEr or in the UnBrEaThAbLe.
DAVENFORTH: Do either of you know how a magnet works
HIGHBLOOD: in the unbreathable gaiz, they already been tainted =Shows finished banana cream pie to Davenforth, he will pie you=
PENNY: ... bro no. -nudges Mayor's hand away-
MAYOR: -Picky eaters... he offers a green crayon from inside of his tattered rags. U NEED TO EAT. sustain your internal skeleton.-
LIFERA: -she's only vaguely awake, wanting very much to hibernate a bit, but fins flick and she peers up around Dave's shoulder to look back at Gaizka.- ... -Grumpy glub.-
DAVENFORTH: -Answer the question. Also he will eat that entire pie-
GAIZKA: =Shrugs a shoulder underneath the pile.= if so a HoLy BrOtHeR pReAcH. =You do you man. Everyone just feel yourselves.= GAIZKA: magnets got tHeM mAgNeTiC aEsThEtIc AtTrAcT themselves some FrEnEtiC.
DAVENFORTH: -This is why he likes you Gaizka-
PENNY: bro........... PENNY: hey big guy are you sharing that pie? I think this dude needs it more than anybody.
MAYOR: -EXCUSE-
DAVENFORTH: Thats just how he eats
PENNY: Im gonna call bullshit on the whole concept of eating then.
HIGHBLOOD: =reaches a long arm to put a potholder on Riley's head. Then balance the pie on it, assembles another one while putting a whole plate of corn muffins with honey glaze on the Gaizka pile= motherfucker seem mightily content
GAIZKA: =Shakes his head out of the pile to peer at the muffins placed upon him. He's just gonna help himself, thanks brosef.= GAIZKA: =Holds a muffin up in Lifera's direction and tilts his head quizzingly. Why the grumpy glubs? Have a muffin.=
DAVENFORTH: -Trying his best to keep Lifera as warm as possible.-
RILEY: -keeps completely still- is there a pie on my head or am i still asleep?
LIFERA: ... -Smiles a little and takes the muffin. Bites it in half in one sharp slice of teeth and offers some to Davenforth.-
DAVENFORTH: (Nah you go ahead baybe im good)
RILEY: -takes the whole thing off her head and DIGS IN-
RILEY: -SHE IS HUNGRY-
GAIZKA: =Takes the opportunity to dump some of the rainbow robes on Lifera and Davenforth since he's getting up now apparently.= :o)
DAVENFORTH: -Gdi-
GAIZKA: AiN't any proper LoVeBiRdInG nest without SoMe FuZzIeS. =He got you homies.= ;o)
LIFERA: -SWALLOWS MUFFIN and snrks.- T)(ANKS seaweedie. -shh... we're married.-
DAVENFORTH: -Ceremony date is pending-
LIFERA: -not us me and Gaizka?? SHEESH.-
LIFERA: 3;*
DAVENFORTH: -Wasted-
GAIZKA: =They can all get married and become goat farmers in the alps. He gives Lifera a lopsided grin.= any ol' time AnGeLfIsH.
TAKODA: -still driving- }8) -he's smiling, wide eyed and trying to stay awake.-
LIFERA: -soft glubs... she loves this clownfish. Speaking of love and this clownfish, she glances over at their driver.- Are you still ocray up there, Takoda?
DAVENFORTH: You want me to take over koda
TAKODA: ... TAKODA: THAT WOULD PROBABLY BE W1SE, 1F WE SW1TCHED...
DAVENFORTH: Get some rest buddy -Smooches Lifs head and gets up to head up front-
TAKODA: -pulls off to the side of the road at the first opportunity-
GAIZKA: =Looks over Liffy while she glances away. Does her hair need a brushin'..?=
DAVENFORTH: -He is the captain now, and he takes a seat, getting them moving again. Where even are they headed? We just don't know, but it would probably be wise to stop at a gas station soon-
QIRIN: =they can always grab a hose and steal gas=
QIRIN: =she was a teenager, once=
GAIZKA: =One does not simply stop being a teenager.=
TAKODA: -wanders towards the back with the clowns and finds himself a seat. he should sleep but... now that he's not distracted by driving his thoughts are racing. darn it.-
GAIZKA: =Welcome to Clowntown. Have a rainbow robe. He drapes it around Takoda's shoulders while humming. Strategically sings out some of the lyrics lowkey.= (can't you see, you're my delight,) =Hum hum.= (just feel like, i won't get you, out of my mind.) =What's up here come dat thought and it's gay as hell.=
TAKODA: -geez... he's still not used to being spoiled with affection like this.- HEHEHE... THANK YOU...
GAIZKA: ;o)c GAIZKA: you feel on PeAcHy KeEn, BrOtHeR? been up on them WhEeLs for LoNg PaSs.
TAKODA: 1'M F1NE... JUST T1RED, 1S ALL. BUT ALSO, RESTLESS?
GAIZKA: yeah? how you ReCkOn that NoIsE AlLs up work? need HiM some PaCiN' or be ThEm ReStLeSs NoTeS of the MiNdSpAcE?
LIFERA: -her hair always needs brushing and is just past her shoulders now... it grows fast. She's spying on those two now, and maybe sliding closer. Lend her your warmth and your cuteness.-
LIFERA: 38)
TAKODA: 1T'S, UH, 1N THE HEAD, MOSTLY... -notices lifera APPROACHING- TAKODA: ... H1.
GAIZKA: seem none act keep SuChIn ThOuGhT FlOw WaNdErInGs at bay. =Sees Lifera slide n scoot on over, and thus lifts one of his big barrel arms. He's big enough for everyone to lend warmth to.=
GAIZKA: and this HoMeTtE? got just them BoD wAnDeRs or MiNd Be AlL iNcLuSiVe?
LIFERA: -squirms her round little self under his arm and snugs close, sighing.- Oh, I'm all thought out, I'm shore. My little ones are taken care of...
LIFERA: -And she's pretty prepared to throw herself into any oncoming frays, swords, bullets, etcetera. She doesn't really need to think much for that.-
GAIZKA: =Lowers his arm to wrap around her once she's snug like a bug in a rug.= AlLs them LiL ThOuGhTwAvEs done up and gone with themselves on the MoThErFuCkInG breeze. i feel you SiStEr.
DAVENFORTH: -Driving gives him time to focus, which for Dave maybe isn't the best thing but oh well. Earth was radically different since he last visited, and he still had no clue what was going on. Undoubtedly, Condy was behind the madness but...why split them up like this but leave them with means of communication? Was she that cocky? Taking a look at their fuel gauge, he figures they have a few more hours of travel time. He'll stop at the nearest gas station when he sees it.-
RILEY: - are you trying to focus Dave because get ready to be brocused. That pie she had is destroyed by now with no trace left. She plants herself in the seat nearest to the drivers- hey.
PENNY: -YEAH YOU GO UP THERE. She's gonna make herself cozy with the grand pieblood too.-
RILEY: -we got a mutual friend now suck on that-
LIFERA: Glub...
LIFERA: I just want to help in whatebber way is N-E-ED-ED.
LIFERA: I don't think my other skrills are of much use here.
PENNY: -GAAAHHHH-
HIGHBLOOD: =If she really is peeping at him he's downing a 2 liter of faygo like its nothing.... which incomparison to him..... it isn't. Peace signs at her=
HIGHBLOOD: =If she really is peeping at him he's downing a 2 liter of faygo like its nothing.... which incomparison to him..... it isn't. Peace signs at her=
PENNY: haha same. -she would guzzle something... IF SHE HAD IT.- PENNY: so uh. what do I gotta do to get a pie from you?
HIGHBLOOD: ain't nothin gotta get down lil sismiss HIGHBLOOD: shit doth occur in the time it's done dued up, you just ain't found it yet =She should check under her seat=
HIGHBLOOD: =He looks downward too actually=
PENNY: .... -follows his gaze. Is he looking at the pie??-
HIGHBLOOD: =He's looking under her seat, directly under the human buttsit, it's in a box with a big :o) on the top=
PENNY: oh shit.
PENNY: -reaches down to pull it out and pops the lid.- crouching pie hidden breakfast.
PENNY: thanks big guy. youre a real ten foot bro.
PENNY: sorry Im having a hard time getting past the whole...
PENNY: -spreads her hands wide- thing.
HIGHBLOOD: ain't no apologies needed
HIGHBLOOD: dunno your shit and ain't gonna pry lil sismiss
HIGHBLOOD: as it is it'll be, can't get its ass no other kinda way, you dig?
PENNY: that is. EXACTLY how I feel thank you.
PENNY: -there's probably not a fork in here right?? She's gonna try to nibble this pie with no hands.-
HIGHBLOOD: =Whats a fork=
PENNY: -yeah that's what she thought-
PENNY: ish pree goo tho.
PENNY: youre the real star of this road trip.
HIGHBLOOD: =compliments on his bakes, hell ye. Shimmers= truth on the quality confectionaries though butterance ain't needed
HIGHBLOOD: here not to be no star but keepin the dream alive as i is and am everywhere :o)
PENNY: dont think anyones ever called me the dream before. -SNRK-
DAVENFORTH: Sup -He's starting to get all focused and serious.-
HIGHBLOOD: ain't everybody got them eyes for prizes sismiss ;o)
PENNY: oh shit. I do like you. -scoops banana whip into her mouth with a hand because fuck it she's hungry and the handless approach isn't working-
HIGHBLOOD: tend to be an agreeable motherfucker what with all mine charm and beauty =chinhands=
PENNY: you are hella both in large quantities to no ones surprise. pretty sure everything about you is large. -eats pie contemplatively.-
HIGHBLOOD: in comparison and proportion :o)
PENNY: okay so real question. how many of these pies could you put down?
HIGHBLOOD: damn...... i mix varieties up in my eatins don't gorge on a single thing till a brofo am full....
HIGHBLOOD: ain't never tried but now got reason to do so :o0
PENNY: you gotta. for science.
PENNY: but mostly cuz I wanna see you eat like fifty pies.
HIGHBLOOD: oh fifty is easy
HIGHBLOOD: that ain't a thang sismiss
RILEY: you've got that look going on. i think it's time for some music.
HIGHBLOOD: =Music..... should be break out the sax=
PENNY: hell... yes??? this guy knows his limits and also his lack of them. God bless.
HIGHBLOOD: gotta be in peace with your mind and vessle sismiss
HIGHBLOOD: can do wonderous things
DAVENFORTH: Only music this bus has is icp if you want that be my guest
HIGHBLOOD: =Don't. He's breaking out the sax, that's it=
TAKODA: WE COULD ALL S1NG, AND PLAY MUS1C, 1F WE ARE THE K1NDS, WHO KNOW HOW TO PLAY 1NSTRUMENTS.
TAKODA: WH1CH 1 DO. AND 1 KNOW FOR A FACT, A LOT OF YOU HERE DO. }:o -at ghb's sax-
HIGHBLOOD: =Now that he's looking at it, yup. Here goes him, playing old pop songs from hundreds of years ago https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=pQxO32lKszo =
PENNY: -SWAYS. This is the best thing that could have possibly happened.-
MAYOR: -percussions on the cans-
DAVENFORTH: -He appreciates the irony but he needs a cigarette-
HIGHBLOOD: =He's fuckin it up on the sax, its just giving you too much life Davenforth=
DAVENFORTH: -A bowl. He needs a bowl. But he doesn't want to lose his focus. He doesn't fight as well under the influence as he used to...-
HIGHBLOOD: =Haha you're old=
DAVENFORTH: -No he just leads a more sober lifestyle-
PENNY: -OLD AS FUCK.-
HIGHBLOOD: =Both, but good on you man. This one goes out to you. Doots soulfully=
RILEY: that sax though.
RILEY: -with all the ruckus at least she can talk to him- you doing okay?
DAVENFORTH: Peachy fucking keen
RILEY: like shit. okay.
RILEY: now we're getting somewhere.
DAVENFORTH: Riri im good just trying to piece together what the actual fuck is going on
RILEY: is this actually something you can piece together? you're gonna stress yourself out thinking about it too much. we have a destination, we just have to get there.
DAVENFORTH: Fuck i dunno but ive gotta try and were a long ass way from minnesota
RILEY: you ever been to minnesota before?
DAVENFORTH: Once dont really remember it
RILEY: yeah. i've never been. had like one show scheduled there but i didn't go. just cuz it was minnesota.
DAVENFORTH: -Taps at the steering wheel-
RILEY: -glances over at him-
RILEY: -y u tap dat-
DAVENFORTH: -He's fine this is all fine.-
RILEY: -time to distract him- so you're legally dead, right.
DAVENFORTH: Dave skellington is me not so much im like missing or presumed dead or some shit just waiting to pop up at my own funeral like some kind of shitty clickbait article the empress of the universe thought he was dead what happened next will warm your heart
DAVENFORTH: Schrodingers asshole
RILEY: wow. that makes so much sense.
DAVENFORTH: I was my own agent
DAVENFORTH: I never revealed dave skellingtons identity to the public
DAVENFORTH: And when he got assassinated i was around him but my death was never confirmed just presumed
RILEY: damn. i should have done that. pulled a hannah montana like you did.
DAVENFORTH: It made shit stupid difficult
RILEY: yeah probably because literally everyone knew who you were.
DAVENFORTH: I worked hard for it
RILEY: weren't there like babies whose first words were dave?
DAVENFORTH: Probably
RILEY: -she pauses- you got a killer headache, huh?
DAVENFORTH: You dont want your babies first word to be dave
RILEY: -there it is- nope.
DAVENFORTH: Sucks to be you
RILEY: there's no possible way that's happening.
DAVENFORTH: -Shrugs-
DAVENFORTH: You doing alright
RILEY: -smug- you don't want your kids' first word to be riley?
DAVENFORTH: It was suh
RILEY: not a word.
DAVENFORTH: Sup is absolutely a word
RILEY: newborns can say suh.
DAVENFORTH: Can they say bro and dude
RILEY: really?
DAVENFORTH: Jinjin is a very talented baby
RILEY: damn trolls and their accelerated development.
DAVENFORTH: You hatin on my baby
RILEY: i'm jealous.
DAVENFORTH: Why you get to enjoy all that cute shit longer
RILEY: no, i mean i'm jealous I didn't grow up that fast.
DAVENFORTH: Wait youre grown up
RILEY: -such a glare- you are SO funny. just a comedic class act.
DAVENFORTH: I was voted most likely to die by cocaine overdose
DAVENFORTH: Also best dressed
RILEY: who are we polling?
JODIE: - shuffles around in the back somewhere. she's extremely hung over-
DAVENFORTH: Well that one was my high school class
QIRIN: =Now Jodie...imagine the greasiest pizza you have ever laid eyes on. Oil is literally dripping from the cheese. YUM.=
JODIE: - she's barely even conscious and she already wants this in her body-
RILEY: nice. great categories. -lifts her head- okay who fucking has pizza?
QIRIN: =I do. An imaginary one.=
DAVENFORTH: -Babe chill-
RILEY: wait. -groans- blaming my bad sense of smell on the baby.
JODIE: - she wants REAL pizza-
DAVENFORTH: I mean they were right werent they
RILEY: close enough. i don't think i was voted into anything. it would have been most likely to go to juvie for truancy.
JODIE: anybody got some water?
JODIE: -HER VOICE IS HOARSE. she got black out drunk and is now reaping the benefits.-
RILEY: -GIRL-
JODIE: -rubbing eyes.-
DAVENFORTH: -Nope only whiskey-
DAVENFORTH: You didnt miss much
JODIE: cool.
RILEY: somebody had a party last night.
QIRIN: =she slowly rose to her feet and handed her an unopened water bottle= ^_^
JODIE: -blessed woman. makes a smooching sound at her and then CHUGS IT-
QIRIN: =dear lord=
QIRIN: If I may interject... Perhaps slower consumption will aid you better...
JODIE: that was like a pre-party. imma wait til we have something to celebrate before i pull out all the stops.
JODIE: -GLUG GLUG???-
QIRIN: =mainly she doesn't want her to choke=
RILEY: you can't get her to slow down.
RILEY: it's impossible.
JODIE: -drinks half the bottle and passes it on back-
JODIE: -fishes in her purse and reapplies lip balm- thanks bby.
QIRIN: It's quite all right, please keep it. =YOU MAY NEED IT LATER=
JODIE: oh sweet. after i drink it all i can pee in the bottle.
JODIE: save us time.
JODIE: -TOSSES IT IN HER PURSE-
QIRIN: =frog god help her=
JODIE: i swear i can get it all in without a stray drop. it's a talent.
DAVENFORTH: Theres a bathroom -If you can call it that-
JODIE: damn. fancy ass bus.
RILEY: a bottle actually might be preferable.
JODIE: -MIGHT BE A LITTLE DISAPPOINTED THAT SHE CAN'T SHOW OFF HER TALENT.-
RILEY: -has to pee aLL THE TIME THANKS RYAN-
RYAN: -rihanna winks from the womb-
RILEY: -GIRL!!!!-
DAVENFORTH: -Hark! Is that a gas station he sees in the distance?-
RILEY: -PLEASE JESUS-
DAVENFORTH: -Indeed it is! Davenforth pulls into the station. Is it abandoned we just don't know yet.-
DEREK: -eyes out the window-
DAVENFORTH: Alright kids its time for a rest
RILEY: i'm really fucking hungry. does this place have those rent a showers? not like i have any earth money on me. do they accept that anymore?
DAVENFORTH: -Shrugs-
QIRIN: What of trading?
RILEY: -blinks at qirin for a moment- oh. yeah! that.
DEREK: -stands up and stretches-
DAVENFORTH: Pretty sure they dont accept third borns
DAVENFORTH: Lets see if this place isnt abandoned first -Looks at Derek like you coming with?-
RILEY: -she's already walking out the bus-
DEREK: -HELL YEAH HE IS. nods at the brother and trots on after-
DAVENFORTH: -Hops off the bus-
DAVENFORTH: So if there aint anyone in there you think you remember how to do that thing behind the counter to get free gas
RILEY: -there better be some FOOD IN HERE-
DEREK: Sure I do. -ok hand- I got this.
RILEY: get us some fuel, baby.
DAVENFORTH: -Heads on in-
DAVENFORTH: Anybody home
RILEY: -curiously looks around. what's this place look like anyway-
QIRIN: Honestly. At the very least write an IOU.
DAVENFORTH: -It's much akin to a good sized seven eleven. Hot dog and pizza machine, aisles of snacks with the cooler section in the back with drinks. There's even a tv on the wall with the latest news. Everything is up and running but Davenforth notes it's quiet-
QIRIN: =what's on the telly?=
RILEY: -if there's no one in here she's gonna take some shit and run. she's checking some expiration dates on some chips to make sure-
DAVENFORTH: -Deez nuts-
DEREK: -peeks behind the counter casually. nobody's there, but maybe they're just in the bathroom or the back room or something. either way, he's hopping over the counter to do his thing.-
DAVENFORTH: -There's probably something on tv about policies the New dual juggalo presidents are going to be enacting. Boring stuff honestly. Oh yeah, Two juggalos won the presidency. Davenforth is trying to figure out how to make some tea for folks. Everyone is cold.-
RILEY: -she's stuffing her arms full of stuff like cheap hot dogs and sandwiches and donuts and a whole bunch of shit before just straight up slippin it in the sylladex. there's a bathroom and she's going to take this opportunity while it's here. tHERE sHE GOES-
DAVENFORTH: I can see why you married her
DEREK: -grins as he watches her go. she scurry.- Yeah... We used to get into all kinds of shit back in the way.
DAVENFORTH: Youre always getting into shit -He too, is stuffing his sylladex full of shit, non perishable food, water, Gatorade, microwavable burritos and pizza rolls...until he actually hears the named shaggy 2 dope and violent j. Now the tv has his full fucking attention-
RILEY: -busts out of the restrooms- okay, guys, i-- -she sees dave looking at the tv so she also is looking at the tv and not believing anything she's seeing right now-
QIRIN: =trying to ignore all this petty crime happening=
QIRIN: Can you believe it? =She's paritially asking herself that question=
DAVENFORTH: That would explain the rise of the juggalos
RILEY: -frowns- you sure this isn't one of those sketch comedy shows? or a mockumentary?
DAVENFORTH: Afraid not
DEREK: -furrows brows at the tv- Whats the point of fucking the planet over to this degree? Did all the Alternian imperialized planets get this kinda treatment?
RILEY: this is fucking ridiculous. how is this a thing? who made this a thing?
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