#still feel real bad for the spy though hahah he was actually a good spy but we kept shredding him up

[anonomi]

Trucks n' vans is so real y'all. I was on Enclosure right, on Engineer, on defense. My team is kicking BLU's ass hard and I'm feeling bad but I know my sentry's the only thing stopping their 3 scouts from rushing the cart, so I stick to Engie. Anyway we have a Sniper on our team and I tell you the SYNERGY I felt with him was crazy. While everyone else was running around loose, this man was all the way back here with me, siphoning my dispenser and I swear he was my guardian angel because he was protecting me with his life.

A soldier appears and tries to shoot my shit from afar? Sniper snaps him. A demo tries sticky bombing me? This Sniper glances at him and he's gone. The enemy Scout tries pistoling my sentry for some reason, should've never stayed still.

But most of all was this spy. This poor, poor blu spy wanted to take me out so badly. He was on me like red on a barn, he'd run in, sap my shit and jump me with everything he had. Didn't matter if it was in the middle of a firefight or if it was all quiet on the front, he would always ALWAYS show up. Legit this man even flew off the roof (zero idea how he even got up there) to assassin creed my ass. He wanted me six feet deep.

But if he was like red on a barn, our sniper was like gasoline-fueled fire on that barn, cause holy hell. This man was out for this french boy. Like, I'm real used to fighting spies off by myself cause everybody's prancing around in the middle of nowhere and I'm all alone on the left side of nowhere, but this sniper would jump in and tear this spy apart himself. Everytime he showed up, our sniper would jump him hard. He'd quickscope him, shoot him, knife him, jarate him, it was like watching the spy go through the seven layers of hell.

I'm very spy attuned, but it felt like this sniper and I were connected on a wavelength, cause he seriously always knew when I was in trouble, and he especially knew when it was trouble from the spy. Like I have never seen a sniper be as spy hungry as me and legitmately fight by my side like that. We would make eye contact and we would trample the spy together.

It was on the same level as playing medic and having a pocket who understands you so well you swear you are telepathically communicating. I've been playing engineer for years and I never felt or expected that from a sniper. Usually they use my dispenser and then run off, but this man was planted by my side. I felt cared for. I felt protected. I felt like Australian Jesus was watching me with a rifle at the ready. Much love to the snipers on my team use my dispenser anytime you want

[abundantchewtoys]

Homestuck^2 re: p33-53

Well, there's bound to be a perspective switch now.

Though Dirk remains the lemony narrator, so he'll be around in a way, not relegating himself to intermissions.

Crack theory: John's a ghost now. :P Nah, there are no dreambubbles anymore.

---

Page 33

Oh HELL freaking yes.

Hah, Candy Earth C - supposedly irrelevant, pffffff.

Them lies.

I mean, sure, the specifics of the timeline aren't relevant, but the people in it will still end up doing relevant things!

So, this is John's house, smack-dap in the middle of salamander village. Candy Jake is tending to the garden - I'm spotting at least one pumpkin patch there. :P

So this means...

This means we'll end up having art for Tavros C/E, Harry Anderson and Vriska ML! Oh hell freaking yes. I'm pretty sure Tavros C is almost a deadringer for John. He had a different frame for glasses, if I recall, and his hair I imagine doesn't stick up, but further than that...

For all we know, they could actually end up being players in Dirk's session, too! :D Through space/time shenanigans.

So yeah, Jake is middle-aged, but... That might mean like 3 more years have passed since the end of the Candy path, right? 42 sounds like a middler age than 39, after all.

Cooool, though. I mean, I love that we're catching up to these people again. The content warnings (groan, Dirk, really? He's continuing to post this on AO3, isn't he?) do indicate that Jake's reminiscencs will take us into some darker venues.

Here's to hoping Dirk isn't going to cut away too quickly from this timeline. ... Wait a minute.

How can Dirk be the narrator of this timeline if it's out of his sphere of influence? That means it's back to Calliope or a speakerless narration! Actually, that's great.

The arrows have changed as well, hahah. Yup, this sure isn't the alpha timeline anymore. :P So much irrelevance to the plot, much wow.

---

Page 34

Oooh, right, his fair moustache! Can't wait to see how it looks in sprite mode, hahah. Say... Come to think of it, if Dirk's any indication, none of the players have earned the right yet to appear in guardian form!

Emerald garden gloves...

Hah, okay, so he's actually not wearing a shirt yet. Cause it's too hot in John's house. Ironic that the Heir hasn't kept his own house aired and cooled.

So, it might actually take place around the time that John went to Roxy? Although, Jake set the two of them up, he should know where John is at the moment. Cool to see that Jake's actually found a new form of independence in his riper age. That he actually manages household tasks quite well, without shooting at the squirrel family or something.

I wonder in what way the timelines will get entwined. Dreams? Ultimate self memories? Machinery like used to transport Joey to Alternia?

It would be weird to have two fully separate stories in one narrative, after all.

---

Page 35

Cool, look at that body hair. Much macho, señor English. :P I can see why the populace of Earth is enamored by him.

Welp. Alcoholism continues being a thing, now even for human Prospit dreamers.

---

Page 37

So yeah, Dad's fridge is still there. Those B1 appliances have sure gone through a lot. Pfff, even the old kitchen magnet's still there, maybe even with the same years-old picture stuffed behind it.

In for a dream memory of Jake on Hellmurder Island? I am!

This looks like B2 Earth's sun, after all.

Good thing Jake never went to 'Nam, or the current ongoing war would've meant this vision of a rainforest would've gone in a very different direction.

But the dream is definitely going to end up going sideways. I mean, no more dreambubbles doesn't mean he can't have vision. Or a Brain Ghost visit, in his case there's a real chance a memory turns into something more substantial.

---

Page 38

That sure is an unsettling dream. Unknown part of the jungle, illogical pine trees, and an inescapable monster.

Reminds me of WV's nightmare. Especially the song about it on the Wanderers album.

"A lithe creature of darkness and fury, with more legs than anything mammalian has a right to." Sounds like a Hiveswap monster right there. Can't think of any of the lusii it would apply to, of the top of my head.

---

Page 39

Welp. Dirk has found him. Well, in his dreams, but Dirk can command Brain Ghosts. And he was saying something about commanding a brain ghost, wasn't he? Okay, welp, I can't find the relevant quote. Page 30 comes closest, saying he used to not be able to contemplate all his spliters.

---

Page 41

Lol wuuuuuuuuut.

Brain Ghost Dirk?!? And he/Jake remembers meeting Aranea?!? Okay, let's park the potential paradoxes here. For one, post-retcon Dirk could have met AN Aranea later on, a different version of her, in a dreambubble dream. But yeah. Still weird.

Also weird: this brain ghost is connected to his Game Over timeline self! And he claims to be a separate Dirk?? Or... Well, actually. He claims a single Dirk has been claiming the narrative, which is true, leaving little space for other Dirks, which is also true. He could (and should?!?) still be part of the other Dirk, right? Unless... Unless the ascended self of a Prince of Heart doesn't mean he can just control his other splinters! (Outside of controlling the narrative, I mean.)

Then again... The Candy path has been said to be explicitly outside the reach of Dirk, so what is this?

God, if the only "good" version of Dirk is a ghost. And hey, this is a way in how there can still be new ghosts even without dreambubbles. Too bad only Jake can spawn them.

Pfff, the idea though. The idea that the only way this Dirk has good qualities is because it's what Jake wants to remember about him.

---

Page 42

He's gonna be scared awake from the fall, right? Still a little douchebag in any iteration.

---

Page 43

Yup. ... So, Brain Ghost Dirk has taken it up for himself to be Jake's guardian? Making sure no one catches him boozesnoozing? Even ensuring Jake maintains a healthy mistrust about Dirk's intentions?

Hmmm... I wonder if he'll start seeing Brain Ghost Dirk again while awake, now.

---

Page 44

Is there still some dirt from his dream on his arm? A message from BG Dirk?

---

Page 45

Ooooooooooh. Yes!! Seems like there's too much narrative for even an ascended Dirk to hog.

I mean, we have to keep in mind that the Prince of Heart's influence doesn't reach into this timeline. So that means, this is a part of Dirk that Jake has breathed life into, but which while vaguely connected to the ascended self, since he knew about Dirk's powers, can't be controlled by him???

---

Page 47

Oooooh, this is a REALLY good way to have Jake talk himself through his issues! Some really good observations from Jake here, things he might not have admitted to himself otherwise!

He's feeling useless, knows Jane is bad news, still hopes to make amends. Meanwhile BG Dirk isn't trying to get him to join the plot outside of the Black Hole.

Jake just wants to make a difference! (Also the observation from BG Dirk about Jake feeling mopey and useless for years also applies to John soooo much.) He's going to go all Lara Croft again? Sweaty, hunky, middle-aged genderbender Lara Croft, hahahah. This would be very cool - even if he's so very likely to get caught. Jane's not stupid.

---

Page 48

So this is Her Janeyness's battleship. Sporks. Sporks!! She crossed )(IC's ship with sporks. Pfffffff.

And he's actually doing this? Already?? Welp. Jane's going to throw him in the slammer again. We're going to have a callback to when the tiara took her over. I wonder if we'll even see some Authority Regulators (Prospitian or Dersite) guarding the prison cells.

Jane's outfit's going to be a cross between a business suit, her Crockertier outfit and Condy's jumpsuit. Though I wonder if she's already that far gone that she's wearing regalia.

---

Page 49

Pffffff, wut? He's actually going through the frontdoor? Jane's even coming to run up to him??

What is this, a daydream? If not, there's no way we'll not see Jane be obnoxiously unknowingly condescending in her conversation.

So, it is in fact a Crockertier two-piece suit, it seems.

---

Page 50

Pffff, wut? Tavros was out with her kismesis, wasn't he? There's the potential here for Tavros simply getting pulled around by Vriska ML, and Jane seeing it as a kidnapping. Also, direct attack? I assumed she found the death of her Dad enough direct already. :P

Pffff, okay. So this can't be more than a few days after the end of the Candy path, after all. So they're all still 39 years old.

---

Page 51

At first I though BG Dirk would start spying on Jane's desk, but nah, he's horseshitting around. So Jake's infiltration isn't even going to be all that hard, he's just going to stand there and get information fed to him.

Jane's descent into tyranny saddens me still.

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Page 52-53

Man, Jake's intrusive thoughts are next level. Jane is still as coldly detached as ever.

[kfawkes]

Omg could you do an eggsy unwin x reader with the prompt “i had to carry you to bed last night, you were exhausted.” from the domestic list. Thanks you so much if you do, I love your writing!

[Okay! :D Sorry guys, been at con as you know, and then yesterday I was working on this and I was SOOO sucked into Stranger Things I couldn’t finish it lol ;.;  But I’m trying to get a few out this week before I gotta get to Blizzcon on Friday. Buuuut as always thanks for being incredible and patient with me :) 

I did so many different things with this, lol so I hope you like it anon ;.; I can’t tell anymore because I’ve been staring at it for so long hahah and the week has been long sooo I'm sorta mentally drained

And to you specifically, Anon- Thank YOU so much for your prompt and the compliment

Pairing: Eggsy X Reader

Words: 1.5k

Warnings: Mild smut, nothing graphic. Some cursing though as always!

—Read on Ao3!]

When you opened your eyes you’d expected to wake face down in a pile of paper like you had been every morning this week. Maybe you’d have reconsidered being a Kingsman if you knew how much paperwork was involved… 

Okay, you absolutely wouldn’t have. Being a Kingsman was the best thing that ever happened to you for more reasons than one. Your incredibly handsome best friend Eggsy was a lovely bonus, but even with a smile like that you could complain from time to time, right? 

Right. 

But instead of waking to Prince licking the fingertips with a cramp in your neck the size of a small country; you woke comfortably in your bed with absolutely no recollection on how you got there.

As you pulled your arms into a long stretch; the kind that you can feel in almost every muscle of your body- you eyed the room cautiously. On each glance around the space, the pieces began falling into place… 

Eggsy had shown up– late. 

One minute you were talking, having a few drinks and then the next thing you knew it he was pinning you against the wall; breathing in your ear, and whispering how badly he wanted you…

You slid your hand over the back of your shoulder feeling the raised flesh once more; and in that moment you could almost feel him there again. Those marks were proof that what you remembered wasn’t just some fantasy: it was real.

But considering he wasn’t beside you now, it was probably safe to say that last night hadn’t been nearly as important to him as it was to you… You knew that sometimes people did stuff they didn’t always mean. Hell, you’d done and said a great deal of things you wish you hadn’t in the heat of the moment. 

Only, this was Eggsy, your very best friend… The guy that brought you coffee every morning, and trained you into the super spy you were now– his words, not yours. 

It was hard to imagine that Eggsy would just… do that to you. But you knew it was a possibility.

You didn’t like the feeling those thoughts gave you though, and decided now was not the time to fixate on them. So you hugged your stomach with a small frown attempting to forget them as best you could; ready to close your eyes to the things you didn’t want to see and feel.

Except now that he’d been pressed against you in the dead of night with lips pushed to yours fervidly– you knew you’d never be able to forget it. You were having a hard time not thinking about it now, how could you be expected to do it every day? 

Perhaps if you couldn’t forget, you could at least pretend to… or even try ignoring it. Just go through the motions, and play the part of the best friend like you always have. As ‘nice’ as that sounded, something told you it wouldn’t be that easy and you remembered nothing ever was…

You actually loved that cheeky shit, didn’t you? 

It was a stupid question really, you knew that. Of course you loved him. Eggsy was kind, caring and far too charming. There was something in the way he looked at you that made you feel like you were the only person in the room and you’d never laughed harder than when you were with hi–

“You ain’t s’posed to be awake yet.” Eggsy spoke in a whisper as he pushed the door open with his foot, causing you to shoot up from bed with eyes wide.

He was shirtless with his hair shoved around lazily and he was wearing the sweetest smile you’d ever seen. When you looked to his hands they gripped two large mugs of coffee anxiously, and once you realized he hadn’t left you; you felt an explosion of relief spread low in your gut.

“You’re still here.” 

“That’s alright, innit?” When he replied this time, his brows raised self consciously and if he was being honest, he was so fucking nervous. 

Eggsy had been trying to find a way to tell you how he felt for months now. But what was the right way to tell your best mate that you were in love with em? Was there really a right way to say that you were the most wonderful person he’d ever met? That he thought about you whenever he wasn’t with you, and that he’d been wanting to kiss you like that since he first laid eyes on you…

Truthfully no words would ever be good enough, and ultimately it didn’t matter because before he even knew what he’d done– it didn’t matter and he kissed you. 

Now that he had crossed that line, he was scared shitless that he’d fuck it up like he did so many things… 

“D’you want–”

You began shaking your head almost fiercely when you realized what he must of thought at your greeting. The last thing you wanted was for him to leave or think you didn’t want him there.

“No, I just… I thought after everything downstairs. That you’d… maybe– I don’t really know what I thought to be honest, Eggsy…” 

“Thought I’d leave you? Nah… never.” He smiled at you again relaxing a bit as he closed the space between you. 

The smell of his skin surrounded you as he sat and you felt a wave of chills run through your body like it had every time before. As you look over his face you felt your heart begin to pound, and by the look in his eyes he felt it too. 

Instead of saying something clever or cute like you’d intended, you went for the more awkward approach of stammering like a fool. “How d-did I get up here? I don’t remember us… being here– during… that.”

You narrowed your eyes on his as you press your tongue to the corner of your mouth, watching as Eggsy’s lips parted slowly answering your question. “You was out cold, had to carry you up t’bed… Think I wore you out a bit, luv.” 

Eggsy’s lips curled into that cheeky smile you loved so damn much as he tossed you a wink; and in that moment you realized you couldn’t really deny how you felt anymore…

Even with the realization pressing at your chest burning for release, you couldn’t help but laugh; shoving him playfully as you turned a pale shade of red. You’d forgotten about the fresh cups of coffee he held until they dripped on your bed reminding you of their existence with a promised stain. 

Eggsy pulled his bottom lip between his teeth shaking his head at you teasingly; eyeing the mess you’d made with pursed lips. “Look what you done now.”

You laughed again quietly into your hand not caring at all, enjoying this– him far too much. A moment later Eggsy leaned over placing the mugs beside you on the night stand, stopping close to your face. He didn’t say anything at first, and neither did you… you just looked at each other, but after a moment he smiled sliding his hand to your neck. 

He traced your cheek softly with his thumb holding his eyes affectionately on yours. “You’re beautiful… you know that, yeah? Most beautiful thing I ever seen.”

For some reason you didn’t know what to say as a lump formed in your throat. There was something about the way he looked at you that was almost paralyzing, and having him only a few inches from your lips wasn’t helping. 

If words wouldn’t come out, then actions would have to suffice… So you lifted your leg over his lap, pulling him closer with your foot as he leaned into you with a soft smile. Eggsy slid between your thighs like he’d done it a million times before with breath soft and warm against your neck.

You pressed your hands up his chest ending on either side of his neck as you lean back into the mattress. With his free hand he slid the hair from your face, scanning you like a landscape.

“You can be pretty sweet when you want to be.” You finally managed to reply as his warmth spread over you like a wave. 

“I ain’t too bad,” Eggsy whispered moving closer to your lips… only seconds from tasting you again. “have my moments.”

You pushed into him lightly with your hips, wanting almost desperately to feel him again. He kissed you then just like you hoped he would, and you could swear in that moment you could see the fucking stars.

“Eggsy, I…” He kissed you as you trailed off, softer than before but just as ardently. 

“I know… me too, luv.”

For this being the first time you’d done– well, any of this. It sure didn’t feel that way. It felt perfect. Eggsy felt perfect. Right. And now as you stare into those azure eyes, gazing over those dimples… you knew this was it. He was it.

And on the off chance you were really downstairs, fast asleep imagining all of this… You could bet your ass this was one dream you didn’t want to leave. 

[helloharani]

Gallagher

[CONTAINS SPOILERS] [all the art work was done by Baileygirl24 on DeviantArt]

I read this series once, when I was 14. I really enjoyed it, so recently I re-read it. Now I remember why I loved it so much. 

This series is written by Ally Carter. It centers around the life of Cammie, who goes to a “prestigious girls school” which is actually a school for spies. There are 6 books and all six books are technically Cammie’s Cove-Ops reports. The first book was written when she was 15, and the last one takes place when she’s 18, so we basically explore Cammie’s teen years with her. I guess it’s the right timing though, since I just turned 18 and I totally get her. 

So yeah the books follow Cammie and her best friends, Bex, Liz, and Macey, on their missions and their life in school. I really love the way it was written. You can see the changes in Cammie’s writing as she gets older, and I really like that because I felt like I spoke like her too, when I was 15. It also makes me think of simpler times. In the book, the missions began with cute romance and boys, and led up to world crisis kinda missions ya know. And like, it makes sense! Because as a teen, most of your problems are tiny like boy problems (although they seemed huge at the time), and now as an “approaching-adult” the problems are bigger. It hits home. 

I love all the characters. I love all the character developments, it was amazing. Amazing amazing amazing. Cammie, who just wanted to be normal, to the Cammie who was so brave and loved everyone else more than herself. Bex, who totally got angry for all the right reasons. Liz, freaking genius! Macey, my goodness the best character development. Zach, my baby, a playful, flirty boy who has the saddest back story ever, and like, he became so strong but still so loving. Freaking, Agent Townsend, and Aunt Abby, and Preston! Man, the list could go on forever. 

Macey, Cammie, Bex and Liz.

I definitely formed a specific bond with each and every character. I really wish they were real. You know, when you love a series so much that you kinda wanna live in it? That’s how I feel right now. 

Just so I don’t forget I’m gonna write down what the books were about, roughly. 

1: The whole “Josh” fling.

2: Blackthorne Boys meet Gallagher Girls. Zach comes into the picture. 

3: Finding out who is after Macey. Circle of Cavan, whaaaat? Whoops, they’re actually after Cammie.

4: Figuring out why the Circle wants Cammie. Joe Solomon is bad? Meeting Agent Townsend, sublevels are closed, retrieving Matthew and Joe’s journals.

5: Cammie’s memory is lost. Re-tracing her steps. Find out they want the list. Find the list.

6: Tracking down the Inner Circle and trying to prevent WW3. 

You can see how this suddenly became serious shit right? Hahah.

But ya. It’s nice to have some nice romance which actually works out (I’m talking about Zach). It’s nice to step out of my own world, and into theirs, where everything that takes place between them is beautiful. Fresh relationships, fresh people, it’s something nice to hold on to, especially now when everything has been so stressful around me. I’d rather stress about what goes on in the story. I love the relationships between Cammie, Bex, Macey and Liz. I love Zach and Cammie. I love Joe Solomon and Rachel Morgan. I love Rachel Morgan and Matthew Morgan. I love Abby and Townsend. I love Macey and Preston. I love how Ally brought back Grant and Jonas in the last book. 

Can I just say I really need a boy like Zachary Goode in my life. 

I love you Zachary, you deserve so much. 

Zach and Cammie (This is the best thing I’ve ever seen)

After reading, I spent a whole day looking at fan art and reading through head canons and everything. I love the fandom. I fucking love this whole thing okay fuck. 

I’ve always wanted to be a spy, but I guess I can’t and it’s really sad. This book really intensified the “what are you doing with your life” feeling and the “honestly you’re useless” feeling I have, but nevertheless, I love it. 

Reasons I can’t be a spy : I’m not smart. I’m not strong. I can’t do all the kicking and parkour stuff. My memory sucks (seriously, they remember everything!) Also, they notice everything, and I’m a blurrcase. 

I don’t know if spies exist but if they do, sucks that I can’t be one hahahahah.

I know that this is just a story, or a book, or whatever. But there’s something about fiction that makes me feel this way, you know? This series made me feel something, like Brotherhood by Sugamins (I haven’t written about it, but I will soon). It’s the kind of fiction that you want to remember forever, because it left an impact and it made you feel. 

Now that I’m older, I understand what I’m reading more than I did when I was 14, and I can still say, this series is amazing. It deserves more recognition. It deserves to be high up there, like Harry Potter. Fuck. Even Divergent got made into a movie. Even Twilight...!!!! Can someone please, give this series the attention and recognition it deserves!!

I just found out that there are epilogues at the end of each book (the new edition ones) because it was the tenth anniversary last year. I’m probably gonna go to Borders soon, hide in the corner and read them all. I need to hahahaha. 

Abby and Townsend.

It’s been a few days, and I still can’t stop thinking about the books. I wish there was more. I wish there was a world where they really did exist, and in that world, I wish that each character is living an amazing life, where their relationships and friendships and lives flourish to the fullest. 

Every time I think about the books, my heart kinda squishes a little bit.  No matter what I write, I will never be able to fully explain how I feel about this series. No words can describe it. Haih. 

I want to cry.

I want to be a work of fiction too. 

Maybe then my life would be cool. 

28th December 2017