#still a bit jet lagged so it’s 2 pm and I’m delirious but like | Explore Tumblr posts and blogs

facetsofthecloset · 8 months ago

Text

Tbh my life would be pretty perfect right now if my current part time janitoring job paid. Like. A livable wage. Genuinely love doing it, the hours are perfect, I like my coworkers (and don’t have to interact with them much which might contribute to that lol), it leaves me so much time and energy afterward to enjoy my day and live my life—

Except I’m still scraping the bottom of my savings to pay the Existing Fees. Not quite as fast, which is nice, definitely, but like. What if I wasn’t in the red and had this job I think is important and enjoy but also doesn’t consume 110% of my whole life. What then, huh? I might have a good time? I might actually have a chance of kicking my constant SI at some point? Can’t have that can we? Misery is the currency that runs the world isn’t it? Can’t have people having a good time. We might be better off as a society then and that’s not allowed obviously

#still a bit jet lagged so it’s 2 pm and I’m delirious but like #come on #come the fuck ON I could actually be HAPPY it’s like RIGHT there I can fucking see it #it’s just an entire decimal point away #and that might as well be the other side of the universe #ramblings #tbh this is the most optimistic and well-adjusted I’ve managed to be about my life in. well pretty much ever #I am happier than I was and you have no idea how amazing it is to wake up at 5 am and be like ‘alright! let’s get ready and go to work :)’#and have that be genuine!! not a forced smile hanging onto my last thinning thread! I’m #I walk to work and every day I think ‘it’s a beautiful morning’#and I come home and think ‘I’m tired but satisfied. let’s take a break and get some chores done’#and I’ve NEVER been that. idk. FUNCTIONAL in my life before #but this is unsustainable #bc I need to get a different job that pays enough at some point #or replace the time I have to maintain my home with another job #which I know would overtax me and make me miserable unless it was a /perfect/ fit as work for me #it’s not fair #it’s so STUPID #it’s just. INEFFICIENT #and I’m still fairly privileged and lucky #like. fuck. everything is just so fucked

3 notes · View notes