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londonspirit · 21 days ago

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Sarah's Starfury Republic Of Pirates Con Ramblings

Now then… it’s been a whole week, my brain’s more or less functioning again so let’s try and remember, shall we?!

Just… this is NOT a real con report, I barely remember things that were talked about (although I will attempt to collect posts and such from Bluesky and Discord) but mostly HOW the whole weekend make me feel. If you wanna read about that, knock yourself out. If not, you need to go and find people that posted about it (#SFROP, #AirportCon and #StarfuryPirates seem to be the hashtags used on assorted social media)

Anyhow, my R and I arrived Thursday afternoon, dropped our stuff at the hotel and went into London for some Christmassy sightseeing (did NOT know you need a ticket for the just opened Winter Wonderland but we got in anyways). It was FREEZING so perfect for a Christmas market. We got back ‘home’ late - and we were the only ones on the bus back to the hotel!!!

Friday morning started … not as planned. I’d forgotten that I had the event set in my calendar. WITH alarm. So it woke us at SEVEN freaking am when we could’ve slept much longer as things wouldn’t start before the afternoon.

Well, we were up way too early so we went to hunt for breakfast. I had checked out the area and I knew there was a breakfast cafe only 15 minutes away. The weather was amazing (sunny, blue skies, cold) so we walked.

Karma is a fucking bitch, but every now and then, she does the right thing.

While we were wandering, a guy came towards us: blond, bundled up stylishly against the cold, sunglasses on his nose, with not a care in the world. There was something familiar about him. My breath literally hitched.

“Uhm, R, is that… Mr Darby?” I asked my friend, keeping my voice down as he came closer.

She nodded carefully, not looking at me. “It is.”

Trying to keep our shit together and NOT scare the poor man, we kept walking; he kept walking, ignoring us (rightfully so; we weren’t wearing anything pirate related so hopefully he thought we were regular passer-bys).

And FUCK ME, that man is HOT!! I mean, usually he doesn’t do much for me (I'm a Taika girl!) but that morning? With the sun shining down on him, being all casual and stuff? Reader, my knees were buckling and my heart was RACING!!! We waited until he was out of earshot (we’re considerate like that!) before we lost our shit - and losing our shit we did!!! There was lots of squealing and giggling and our morning was sooo made (See, waking up too early did have its advantages then!!!)

Breakfast was nice (The Flying Egg cafe https://maps.app.goo.gl/oyZ3YED3bkq5oamF6 is really good and cost less than hotel breakfast!) After that we did some shopping (some snacks and drinks to save some money; which has led to me having the most ridiculous bottle opener ever!) and went back, starting to get ready for registration.

God, this fandom is the LOVELIEST. I went down to the lobby to check how things were going; instantly were met with somebody asking my name and pronouns, giving me a name sticker and explained the newbies how things usually went. Met some folks I’ve met before, finally met some I only knew online, the usual. Registration went smoothly, and then we went to find dinner before it was time for the opening ceremony. It still feels weird to actually SEE them, in the flesh, in all their beautiful pirate glory!!!

It went by quickly, just a few words, hi, happy to be here, bit jetlagged (Rhys and Vico), drove down with his equipment (Kristian), we’re going to have a great time! Barely 10 minutes or so and they were off again, like a gorgeous dream.

BUT there was the ‘speedating M&G’ right after so we wandered over, loosely sticking with the people from our table. And we ended up with some of those back at another table, waiting for one of them to sit down and talk to us/us talking to them!!!

We had BARELY any questions, and trying to figure out what to say/ask was hilarious! BUT we made plans for the switching seats so everyone could sit next to them and not only two people.

I think Kristian came first and it was a bit awkward as we didn’t really know what to talk about. I asked him how he was, somehow nobody has asked him (?) so it went from there, just a bit of chit chat, mostly German swear words, bits of GoT (which he liked that I’ve never watched it O_O) and stuff like that, and then he was off again already.

After that we got Rhys which DAMN, up close? Even more devastating, the grey in the stubble was KILLING me (in the very best ways!). He was a tad tired but we got him to talk about his foster cats which was lovely.

After that we waited for quite a while (lots of Gold tickets and only 5 guests); we were joking they were avoiding us as we didn’t have anything interesting to ask. But then came Nathan (I REALLY don’t know the order anymore, sorry) and he was such a surprise. He straight away asked where everyone was from and EASILY got the conversation going which I had NOT expected! He was amused about the many Germans at the con, told us he’d be here this weekend (Comic Con in Stuttgart). [He was sat next to me, and touched my arm a few times while talking which O_O].

For Con and Vico we had people who wanted to sit next to them so we devised a plan to switch seats (we didn’t know who would be next) and when Con came over, people stood and switched and he somehow thought (jokingly) we were running and wanted to race them.

He started with a dad finger trick to break the ice (which worked beautifully) so I told him a stupid dad joke back (Which bees give milk? … booBEES! I don't know, I heard that just a few days before!) The scolding and eye-roll I got for that was gorgeous! *hehe* That man’s just the sweetest; I don’t really remember what we all talked about but he was sadly gone way too quickly. (My R sat next to him and she was in heaven!!). Oh, and she asked him about theatre and/or musical and the answer was basically that theatre isn't really what he wants to do unless it's the right play and the right director (and even then probably NOT in London which is a shame but yeah...)

Next up: Vico. GUH!!! I fucking LOVE them. Their energy was through the roof and they were talking a mile a minute! What did we talk about? I can’t remember. OH! They loved my earrings (as did a few others) which made me very happy!!! What I do remember (and I begged R before to NOT let me do it) was that I had to gush about Vico’s hair. I'm a hairdresser, and their hair journey from the mohawk to the curly mullet now is just so GAH for me. So yeah, I told them how much I love it and their face fucking LIT UP!!! I mean, I'm passionate about hair but they just fueled that passion and GOD, their eyes are insanely beautiful!! HNGNGGH! (also got touches on the arm so yeah… *heart eyes*)

(Also, their handler had to remind them thrice that their time was up as they didn’t manage to find an end! Aww.)

Eventually it was over and everyone floated out, clearly very high on pirate love!!!

After that there was the party where the music BEFOREHAND was just horrible (more suited to a SPN con than ours) so of course my R went up there and taught them about pirate music!! I'm still laughing about her gesturing passionately while our table watched in awe!!

We signed Kristian’s massive birthday card (made and passed around by Fyre; I REALLY hope he’s got it!) and went to bed not too late as we had a BUSY Saturday ahead of us and we didn’t want to look like ghosts!!

So yeah, that was (Thursday and) Friday!!

(pics from SF's Twitter page)

Saturday morning, getting up, getting ready for photos!! PHOTOS WITH VICO AND CON, cause I KNEW I just had to have these two!!! (auto were included with Gold so I could get these signed; I brought Kristian’s book and we got posters so I could have Rhys sign one of these. Nathan was an extra guest and NOT included which was okay with me.)

I had two separate outfits, one for my Vico pic, one for Con. I was a bit worried about timing but it all went super smoothly and quickly so I had time to change.

Con was first. And set the stage quite Con-style!

“I had fucking coffee. Bring it on!” or something like that when he came out!!! I love that man.

We were pretty much first in queue; I went up to him, still VERY calm and collected which I do NOT know where that came from. (Maybe because they’re not celebrities, they’re fans of the show just as us and it shows!!) He wanted to put his arm around my shoulder when I stepped up and then fucking ASKED if it was okay. Mentally I was screaming. Outwards I was like, sure but I want a hug anyways if that's okay.

“Sure,” he said and then pulled me against himself so hard I almost stumbled against him (*I* can see that in the pic) and then wrapped his arms around me and my brain went offline. It was over way too soon. I said thank you and wandered off, brain still going eeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeehhhhhhhh! *lol*

After that we queued for Vico. (What I LOVE about the SF cons (or this one, at least) while you queue you can watch everyone else which was soo fucking lovely. Again, they’re FANS like us and it fucking shows in everything they do!!!

Once it was my turn with Vico their bright smile almost knocked me back over (esp since apparently they had been up since THREE FREAKING AM for an audition or so; they posted a video).

“Can I have a hug?” I asked, and they were against me in a heartbeat! And they were the only one I could actually smell. And GOD, they smelled so good. And they’re soo freaking tiny!!! And yet, soo much strength. Of all my pics I love this one soo fucking much. And it shows which I love even more!!!

After that we were done and sadly had to leave the room.

Back to the panel room we went, blocking a table for the few lovely people we connected with and just after noon, Con and Nathan took the stage.

These two together are fucking LETHAL!! It went downhill VERY VERY quickly. I can’t remember shitall, I know my belly hurt from all the laughing, at one point I might have teared up (first of many many more over the weekend) because of Con’s intense plea to look after each other in these times. This cast, I swear.

There were cakes to bake at knifepoint, Con O’Neill being very very passionate about cheese: he will scold you HARD if you pair it with the wrong everything; Nathan VERY devastated that he had to wait to see Wicked until AFTER the con! And so much more, there’s a lovely person here on Tumblr, who posted about the panels which I will reblog in a sec!

After these two manics where Vico and Kristian. This was tad more subdued even though Vico was still their bubbling, hyper self. I think there were talk about them loving dragons, music… god, my memory on the actual panels is shit! SORRY!

Next up was Rhys (solo). He talked about a lot of things but what stuck with me (naturally) was the love and respect he has for Taika and his genius. He said he wished Taika would do cons so he could feel the love just like they did!!! I might have made noises. Rhys would love to work with him again, he’s brilliant… he was praising him a lot and my heart melted!! Their friendship is the most beautiful thing!!! GUH!!

There was talk about Costa Rica which made the whole room explode with laughter, him talking about his craft, and how very much he still loves Stede and the show. (if anyone has more concrete things, PLEASE TELL ME, my brain’s a sieve. I kept staring at the man, still baffled to actually be in the same room as him!)

He closed out the panel portion of the day; after that were autographs! And we had decided to get them all on Saturday so we had the Sunday for panels and no need to rush anywhere. (HA!)

Again, what with being Gold and single numbers on the badge we were there early. I had my pics from earlier with Con and Vico which I wanted signed; Con looked at it and nodded approvingly: ‘That’ll do’, he said a few times; sadly I didn’t have much else to say to him so I thanked him and wandered over to Vico.

Ugh, I love them soo much. ‘Look at how CUTE we are’ they said (and wrote on it). And yes, we are. Told them how much i loved the pic, and that I’ll be replacing my DT pic on my socials with ours! Their FACE!! Guh. Seriously, they’re fucking GLOWING from the inside and it’s blinding!!!

Kristian was next. I had his book; he asked whether I read it (not through yet, started a few weeks ago which he wasn’t too bothered about) and then… he bloody showed me two german words somebody had written down for him (or possibly he himself had found) and wanted to know what they meant. (they were rude words describing people with a lively sexual life)! I mean, i did NOT have teaching Kristian Nairn German words on my bingo card but here we were. Corrected one word as it was written wrong (WHAT?) and tried to explain it - not entirely right- but he was satisfied. His grin was very happy when he said goodbye! *shakes head* This cast, I swear.

I had Rhys sign one of the posters as I didn’t have anything else with me. And can I tell you, being smirked and fucking WINKED at, does things to you you’re not ready for!!!! HNGNGGN!!! (which def sold me on making CHOICES the next morning!) I know I thanked them all for coming over and hoped they were enjoying the con and themselves so not being a total idiot, I guess *hehe*

After that we needed food and got ready for the Cosplay contest later that evening.

The WHOLE DAMN CAST came out to judge it!!! ALL OF THEM!

And GOD, this fandom is soo fucking talented!!! The costumes, the CARE people put into it, the blood, sweat and tears… it’s INSANE!!

The deserved winner was wearing coat that depicted ALL OF SEASON 1!! They went and added ALL THE TINY DETAILS onto it… it‘s madness and the most beautiful thing I’ve ever seen. Also, TEARS because FUCK ME, having the the creator and cast talk about it and the love for our show and start choking on tears is NOT helping me stay calm!!!

After that, more party which we did since Kristian was dj’ing and Vico was dancing their little heart out until 11 or so (Nathan was also still there). We stayed a bit longer once they’ve left as we didn’t have much going on on Sunday…

… or so I thought!!!

Sunday morning started quiet with a late alarm as only R had things happening before the panels. (And the morning photos had been pushed back half an hour anyways!) We went for breakfast… and somewhere between coffee and cornflakes I was like ‘I cannot leave here with only two pictures when there’s FIVE cast members here, can I?!’ S was NOT helping and soon we were ordering pics, racing back to paint a face on and then we were queueing again for more photos!!!

Nathan was first and I was the 2nd in line and he was tired *lol* So that one’s a bit boring!

Kristian remembered a) my name and b) that I was German so he greeted me with ‘Guten Morgen’ which was lovely, and I love that we’re both a tad unhinged in the pic from the giggling!

And then Rhys. I swear that man wants to kill me with that casual unexpected HOTNESS. That morning he was wearing what he was wearing and I WAS NOT READY!! *breathes heavily* But then again, you never are so yeah.

Anyhow, I knew I didn’t want an ordinary pic with him, and was pondering what pose to do. And somehow a ‘back to back’ felt like the right choice. R wanted to do the same so once she was done and he wanted to turn back again, I was like ‘nah, just stay like that, I want the same’ which made him smile. So yeah, I REALLY like that picture!!! *sighs happily*

We were still lingering about, just watching them ‘work’, waiting for our new friends but eventually we had to leave! I saw some wonderful pics done (I think this particular one was take the day before: everyone looking everywhere BUT the camera, which was hilarious!)

After that we went back into the main hall only to find our new friends having saved us spaces at the table (that’s why I LOVE those cons, you just find YOUR people!)

First panel was Vico and Nathan which I remember shit all about!!! *hides* I can’t for the life of me remember any specifics.

I'm pretty sure there were some Wicked stings which made Nathan wail; oh and I think that was the one where the poor man disclosed that he hates CRABS which naturally made Vico tease him merciless about it!!! *lol* According to Discord there was also talk about carol singers in everywhere else and then in PR which apparently is them yelling at people in their houses until they let them in (Vico REALLY needs to do more comedy, their timing is fucking IMPECCABLE!!) Also, audio work (which reminds me I REALLY need to check that out, I need some Vico readings in my car!)

After that: Rhys and Con. That was a pairing I was looking forward to a LOT as they’re usually not put together in a one on one. And BOY was that a hoot!!!

Con his grumpy lovely self, Rhys a bit less jetlagged (yet still annoyed at the tech people chattering backstage when he’s trying to listen to questions; they stopped talking after that and he was fine.)

KEVIN!!!

It’s THE running gag already (Rhys said it’d be dead in a week, Con doubted that,, and he’ll win THAT bet: there’s stickers and SHIRTS already which will make an appearance at random Rhys gigs next year so yeah…) It’s got something to do with Con assuming there just has to be a sex tape with Rhys (no idea HOW he got there) and that it had to be with someone named Kevin (Rosie’s name fell a few times too; it was CHAOS I tell ya!) and I think it was Rhys who yelled ‘Kevin, give me the tape(s)’!!! Which is now a thing and I’ll be randomly yell that at pirates and/or Kevin’s I will cross paths with in the future!!! It was fucking hysterical and I'm still giggling just thinking about it!

Rhys did take a fake phonecall with his agent, about Star Trek and Star Wars, about cities to visit in Japan and Con was cackling in the most delightful way while Rhys looked very smug about making us all laugh.

Their back and forth was AMAZING; for some reason that surprised me, but they’re soo good together (another reason why I'm sad there's not more!) I think there was a dinosaur question in there too; the hour was over way too fast, I could’ve listened to them so ages. But R and I had tickets for Con’s fan meet so we left a bit early eben though the man in question was still on stage (which makes me sad because apparently we missed that ‘Izzy wouldn’t officiate Ed’s and Stede’d wedding, he’d rather watch them fuck.’ EXCUSE YOU?!?!? (and yes, i'm pretty damn sure there’s another Steddyhand fic in the making for me if I can find the energy to write again)

So yeah, Fan Meet. (I bought it as a present for R in case she’d miss out; she did on the Saturday one; and it was planned as a gift but she bought one herself in time so I went along; what a hardship! *grins*)

About 20 of us in a room, with one Con O’Neill. Oh, that man. The sweetest grumpiest man I’ve ever loved! He’s sooo fucking kind and lovely; loves his dog desperately; is in fact married (which we assumed but it was nice that he eventually got tired of trying to stick with ‘partner’ and just switched to ‘husband’ - my heart soared at that.) Fyre did a lovely write up of that one, so I’ll link to that. (R asked the last q about Cooper and my heart is still aching for him!)

We floated back out once it was over and back into the main hall where Nathan was Kristian’s guest for WJW. And no, I don’t remember one bloody thing about it, sorry!

Hm, when did Sean announced the gifted pic? Was it before the first panel? Anyways, since basically all pics and autos were done on Saturday, everyone got gifted one of the group pics and we ALL could get them signed: Gold even WITH Nathan. FOR FREE!! (So yeah, not one bad word about SF - they’re not perfect, I know that, and Sean’s not the most people'y person but that was a VERY nice thing!)

So yeah, after the last panel back to the auto room we went… where we would stay for the next 2 hours or so, waiting our turn because especially Con and Vico took their time chatting.

I didn’t mind one bit; I could watch them for hours; we chatted with fellow crew and I personally had the most wonderful time.

I'm now the very proud owner of a signed pic, got to talk a bit more to them all (gushing to Vico some more about their hair) and in general got way more for my money then I could’ve ever hoped!!!

Once we emerged we were famished and went for food before it was back into the main hall for the Closing.

And once again, this cast is the most magical out there!!! Everyone said a little bit, most of them told us to stick together, look after each other in these hard times ['FUCK 'EM' - Con O'Neill about everyone who wants to fuck with us!] and were the most beautiful souls out there. I teared up more than once and barely kept myself from just wailing loudly! Such wonderful people who love our little show almost more than we do. *sighs*

The room was so full of love and joy and happiness. And sadness, yeah but there was one last party to go to. Which we did. Vico came out as well although they stayed in the foyer, just chatting to people and from what I’ve heard it was wonderful for everyone.

We went to bed rather early as we still had to pack because we had to leave rather early.

Goodbyes were said, hugs were hugged and off we went.

Now it’s been over a week, and im still not really back in the real world. It still feels surreal to have these memories, have the pics and autos, have all the AMAZING gifts people handed out which I will treasure massively.

Sadly we already know that this was a one off (which makes me unbelievably glad we went) so I will always have the most incredible memories of this wet and windy weekend in November in a hotel full of pirates and queer joy and happiness. Which will stick with me even more than meeting the cast: seeing everyone just be their beautiful unique self, without fear, without having to hide themselves away, be loud and proud and as queer and diverse as they can be!!! EVERYONE understood, everyone cared and GOD, isn’t that the most amazing thing?

That Jenkins' little show was able to do this?! One of the many many reasons I fucking adore this show and everyone involved!!!

So yeah, that’s it. Probably the longest I’ve written about an event I’ve been to; as I said, it’s more about feelings than proper report but I’d like to have that here. And if you’ve read it all, CONGRATULATIONS, you deserve ALL THE COOKIES for sticking with my insane ramblings!

#CrewForLife has never been truer than with this show and its beautiful people!!!

#personal #sfrop #starfury pirates #ofmd con #trop con #starfury convention #ofmd #our flag means death #the republic of pirates #vico ortiz #rhys darby #con o'neill #nathan foad #kristian nairn

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summerlinenss · 2 months ago

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I don't know, maybe it's just me but Taika's fans (not just Ed's fans) seems like practically left OFMD fandom. The fandom only supports Darby out of all the actors. Any appearance of him on the red carpet and people go crazy. Any poll - again he gets the biggest support. Taika's not noticed or deliberately ignored. No one cares about his new projects or appearances on the red carpet in this fandom. Almost no one in the fandom even congratulated him on his birthday... He appears in the thread for their discussion only when they want to judge him (for the cancellation of the third season for example). Taika Waititi in this fandom exists ONLY in connection with Darby. He OUGHT to make We Are Wolves because their beloved Rhys needs it. TBH I can't even look at their joint photos anymore because of it. Again Taika appears on my TL only when Rhys is around. I won't even mention Con! Rhys is the only one who needs support in this fandom, who is pitied and loved. Taika apparently doesn't deserve it because he always wears the mask of a confident guy. In any case, I hope Taika just continues to quietly pursue new projects. Yes, Ed will probably remain his brightest and best role and we are unlikely to see him in leading roles (only small cameos) in the near future but we need to move on. Although of course he gets hate here much less than in Marvel fandom. Some ppl here even love him. Thanks for that, I suppose.

…i hope assume this is bait but regardless, yes, i think it is just you, anon. i don’t think any of what you’re saying is fair or accurate, and it’s actually pretty rude and disrespectful.

i can tell this is prompted by the photos from the red carpet of his new film today, but claiming rhys is the only cast member to get (and need) any support from the fandom is a massive exaggeration and blatantly untrue. one of the best things about this fandom is that everyone supports the cast & crew’s other projects, from samba’s new film to nathan’s play to rachel’s directorial debut (and they all support each other, as well).

going off that, this is the first time rhys has ever played the lead role in a tv series, and that was mostly because of taika. no one is demanding for we’re wolves to be made because rhys “needs it,” they’re hoping for a sequel they’ve been anticipating for years to finally be made (and yes, rhys getting another leading role will be nice). rhys deserves love and praise just as much as taika does. they’re our co-leads. and i hate to break it to you but they’re best friends + collaborators going on 30 (?) years now, so he’s not going anywhere from taika’s life or work any time soon.

frankly, the real reason most fans don’t explicitly talk about taika as much anymore is because they’re afraid of literally being harassed. it has nothing to do with not caring about him, but it gets exhausting when you can’t even write his name in a post without people sending you awful false accusations and graphic death threats towards him. but many people initially took interest in ofmd because they love taika’s work and heard of his involvement (i’m one of them). and many of us still vocally love and stick up for him.

i feel like this is an issue of needing to curate your tl better, honestly. find and engage with the people who post what you want to see, block and mute those who post what you don’t. and if it bothers you that other people talk so much about the leading man of their favourite show, i don’t really know how to help you with that.

#asks #anon #rhys darby #taika waititi #ofmd cast #well this is a fucking weird one #the cheek the nerve the gall the audacity and the gumption

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zoyaofthegardvn · 2 years ago

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Hey, doll :)

I know you are currently drowning in requests, but I wanted to ask if I could request an angsty mor x reader. However, if someone has already asked something like that just disregard this one xx

ILY 🌺

New Friends, Old Insecurities (1)

A/N: Yes yes yes! I love writing angst to fluff stuff! Thanks so much for the request, anon! :) This will be divided into two parts!

CW: None! But this is pure angst, so the fluff isn't til I write a part 2!

Update: Part 2 is now posted! Read it here!

---

You sighed as you watched Emerie and Mor spar, taking a seat off to the side so that you could finish up the work you'd brought along with you. You decided to come today because you've been missing your mate, but it's clear that you won't be receiving any of her attention today like you so desperately craved.

Ever since Nesta had become best friends with Gwyn and Emerie, they'd become close to everyone in the Night Court. In fact, you'd grown especially fond of Gwyn, and now considered her one of your dearest friends. Emerie and Mor had clicked, and their friendship had taken off fast. You were happy that Mor was making more friends, especially female friends as she'd spent so long just with Rhys, Cassian, and Azriel. But, you were, in fact, jealous.

You tried not to be. Really. But it was a deep insecurity of yours, that Mor would find someone better and leave you. She was just so bold, so confident, so commanding and brave. And so was Emerie. You were reserved, and quiet. You weren't a warrior like Mor, sticking to more intellectual pursuits. You didn't like to party, and you never had any interest in learning a sword. You had always wondered if Mor wished she'd been mated to anyone but you, but for the most part, you were able to look past the insecurities, as your relationship with her was loving and perfect.

But she was spending so much time with Emerie. They'd train together even when the Valkyries weren't, they'd go to Emerie's shop and talk weapons for hours, they'd patrol the camps as a pair and often sat together to talk about anything and everything. It'd been weeks of this, and though it was you that Mor came home to every night, you that she made love to, you that she said she loved, you genuinely had your doubts.

You were interrupted from your thoughts when someone came to stand in front of you. Looking up, you're greeted with Gwyn's kind smile.

"Hey," she says, hand over her eyes to shield from the sun.

"Hey," you respond, but your heart isn't in it.

Gwyn looks back over her shoulder, to where Mor and Emerie are laughing as they take a water break, and she looks back to you with concern in her eyes.

"S'fine," you shrug, a bit embarrassed that others had began to notice your mate's affections for another female.

Gwyn shakes her head. "It's not," she says, reaching her hand out to grab your own. She pulls you up and places a hand on your shoulder. "I'm done for the day, how about we go into town before dinner? We could go to the bookstore?"

You glance behind her, where Mor hasn't even turned to look at you or made her way over to say hello, and then you nod. "Yes, I think I'd quite like that."

---

"She adores you, Y/N, I think she's just forgotten how it's like to make a new, true friend, you know?" Gwyn says, taking a sip from the hot tea she'd ordered from the bookstore cafe.

Your eyes roam the shelves in the Fantasy section, your iced coffee clutched in your hand. "I never see her anymore, and when I do, it's when we're getting ready for bed, or she's about to leave in the morning, or I see her when we're all in a group. And even then, it's like she's not even with me."

Gwyn hums, then grabs a book with an emerald green cover, a dragon illustrated on the front. She flips it over to skim the back. "It is pretty shitty, I'm not denying that. But I don't believe it's because she loves you any less than she always has."

You shrug. "I don't know what to do anymore. The only time it even feels like we're in a relationship is when she wants to have sex."

Gwyn's head snaps up. "That's just wrong! I'm sorry she's making you feel this way. You deserve better. Have you tried talking to her about it?"

You shake your head, and try to stop the tears welling in your eyes. "No, I haven't. I don't know how."

Gwyn reaches out and rubs your arm gently. "You're one of my best friends, Y/N, we'll figure it out together."

You smile at her, a pure, genuine smile, something you hadn't done in weeks. "Thank you, Gwyn."

She returns the affection, then hands you the book she'd pulled. "This sounds like something you'd enjoy."

---

You and Gwyn spent hours at the bookstore, browsing and reading. Gwyn had been right, the book she'd found was exactly what you enjoyed, and you two read your new books, hers being an obscene romance title, for a while at an outdoor table, sipping your drinks and sharing a few slices of lemon cake.

You two also discussed how you'd confront Mor, and when. It was decided that you'd ask her about it tonight, before bed. You'd remain calm, and you'd try not to cry. You would avoid an argument, and you'd explain how you'd feel. It was a good plan. A solid one, that you hoped would work.

You two decided to leave as the sun began to set, knowing you'd be late for dinner at this rate, but you wouldn't miss it entirely.

You could hear your friends laughing and drinking as you arrived back at the house, and as you and Gwyn slipped your shoes off, you heard Cassian call, "There they are!" before him and Azriel came into the hallway.

Azriel smiled at Gwyn, bending to plant a sweet kiss to her lips before pulling her along to the dining room, where a full meal awaited her. You grinned at them, beyond excited that they'd finally accepted their mating bond.

Cassian clapped you on the back, smelling strongly of wine, and pushed you into the room as well. Instantly, your eyes fell to Mor. She was sat next to Emerie, who was sat in the seat you usually occupied. Instantly, your smile vanished. Gwyn met your gaze and rolled her eyes, shrugging, as if to say, "Screw them."

Your lower lip trembled at the small betrayal, but you swore to yourself that you weren't going to cry. Rather than take a seat at the table, you made your way to the kitchen to grab a glass of wine.

As you poured, you heard the door swing open behind you, but you didn't care enough to look.

"Where've you been today?" Mor asks, curiosity lacing her tone. Usually, you told Mor about your every move. Mostly because she worried when she didn't know where you were, and you liked the idea of someone caring about what you were doing.

You still didn't turn around, filling your glass nearly to the brim before setting the bottle down and taking a deep sip.

"I went to town," is your curt reply, cold and to the point.

You hear her take a few more steps towards you, but before she can reach you, you spin away from her and head towards the door, straight back to the dining room where you take an empty seat beside Gwyn, across the table and on the other end from where Mor and Emerie have taken seats.

Mor enters shortly after, looking confused, and she stares at you a long while when she notices that you'd sat as far from her as possible. You refuse to make eye contact, instead, you focus on making yourself a plate of the dinner Feyre and Elain had made. It smelled divine, and you were starved.

Conversation remained light, and mostly, you could tune out Emerie and Mor's voices, whatever conversation they were having. Gwyn, bless her, spoke to you nearly the entire time. She was a great friend, and a welcomed distraction.

When everyone began to clear their plates and put stuff away, you instantly went to the door after cleaning your mess. Usually, you and Mor would hang out for a while, then make your way home together. Without fail, nighttime was reserved for one another.

You waited by the door for a while, growing impatient and nearly ready to just leave Mor behind and wait for her at home, when she came around the corner.

"Hey," she says, furrowing her eyebrows at the sight of you all ready to leave.

"Are you ready?" Is how you respond, again, cold and to the point.

Mor rolls her eyes, confused and a bit agitated. "Well, actually, Emerie wants me to come to the shop tonight and work with her, I just wanted to let you know."

Cold dread washes over your body, your heart dropping. Once again, Mor is choosing Emerie over you, and once again, you're convinced that she wishes Emerie was her mate and not you.

"Are you serious right now?" You whisper, voice angry and brittle.

Mor says nothing, just looks at you with a questioning glare.

You laugh, humorless and bitter. You throw your hands up. "Well, Mor, you just have the most fun, and how about you stay there tonight, since you're so fond of her, hmm?"

So much for not starting an argument.

Mor recoils. "Excuse me?" she grits out, beyond offended.

"You heard me. Stay with her tonight, let's stop pretending like you don't prefer her to me," you spit, your voiced hushed as you're aware of all of your friends just in the next room over.

Mor shakes her head. "You cannot be serious right now," she glares at you like you've gone mad. "So, you're jealous?" she asks, and you don't respond. She scoffs, "I thought you were better than that."

And that, to you, is the nail in the coffin. You can't help the tears that well and spill over your cheeks. You look at her, you shake your head in disappointment, then you pull open the front door and leave.

---

You made it back home in record time, in case Mor did decide to come home, you didn't really want to face her. You slam the front door shut behind you, and in the privacy of your living room, you let loose a sob.

For weeks she'd been neglecting you, ditching you, spending more time with Emerie than her own mate. Her wife. She'd started giving the time of her day always dedicated to you, to someone else. She was never home. She hardly acknowledged whenever you were in the same place as her, and when she was home, it was to have sex, then sleep, then repeat. It hurt. And you couldn't take it anymore. You could feel the bond pulled taut between the two of you, and you closed yourself off from it entirely so that you could try to forget it even existed.

You're in your bedroom, still crying, when you hear the front door open. Mor.

She calls your name, sounding beyond frustrated. When she can't find you anywhere, she goes upstairs, and throws open the bedroom door.

When she barges in, her eyes land on your form, sat on the bed, head in your hands.

"What the fuck has gotten into you?"

Your head shoots up. "Me? What's gotten into me? I'm not the one falling in love with another woman!" Your voice is shaky, and your hands tremble as you take Mor in, her hands on her hips as she paces the room.

"Are you nuts? Emerie is my friend! I cannot believe you're acting like this out of jealousy!" She shakes her head like she's disappointed, like she's scolding a child for bad behavior.

You stand up, but you don't approach her. "And what about your mate?!" you roar, pointing a finger at her. "What about the female you married, the female you never fucking see anymore? Huh?"

Mor looks taken aback by your sudden shift from sadness to rage. "We've been bus-"

"DON'T! Don't give me that shit!" You bring a hand up to wipe furiously at the tears on your cheeks. "You're the one that's been busy with another female, I've been here, the whole fucking time, waiting for my mate to act like she's still in love with me!"

Mor flinches like she's been struck. "You can't be serious! Of course I'm in love with you Y/N, and I have seen you, every night I come home an-"

"And you fuck me then go to sleep, so you can wake up and see Emerie again." You spit, knowing it's a low blow, but that it's also true, and a cruel part of you wants to hurt her the way she's been hurting you.

Mor pales, her jaw clenches and her hands begin to sake with barely controlled anger. "We have never, ever, just fucked, and you know that. How dare you? How dare you act like every time we're together it doesn't mean something more than that?" Her voice cracks at the end, and it surprises you, that she'd start crying over this too.

"Do you think about her when we have sex?" You know you're just antagonizing her, but truly, you're convinced that you're not the female she's in love with anymore.

Mor's eyes widen, and she snarls before marching towards you. "Don't you ever fucking say something like that again! I have never not shown you that I'm in love with you!" She's in your face, and her angry tears are spilling from her eyes.

You push past her and make your way to the closet door, needing to put distance between the two of you.

"No, you've just started spending your entire days and evenings with her, only coming home to have sex with me then leave before I wake up. You've only been dedicating your time spent with me to her and her workshop, our breakfast dates to training sessions with her. You've been neglecting to ask me about my day and how I've been so that you can tell me all about your day with her. You've just been ignoring me when I'm in the same room as you two, because you're clearly having too much fun with her to be bothered. And you've started giving her my seat at the dinner table, because rather than find out where I am, you'd rather have her fill my place."

Mor's dead silent, staring at you from across the room. Her tears are still dripping, her hand is clenched into a fist and her other hand has come up to cover her mouth.

"All I've wanted these past few weeks is your attention. Your love. And no matter what I do, I can't seem to get it. But... but Emerie has no problem." You pause and take a deep breath, trying to steady your voice. "So, no, Mor. Maybe you've not exactly shown me that you're not in love with me, but you have shown me that you're falling in love with someone else."

She chokes on a sob. "No, Gods, no, baby. No. Never could I love anyone else."

You're crying again, and you choke on a sob mixed with a bitter laugh. "I-I think that you want to believe that. Mor, I've always known that I'm not right for you, mates or not, I think you know it too."

You turn and open the closet door, entering the small space and grabbing one of your larger bags. Mor walks in after you.

"T-That is not fucking true!" She blubbers, heaving deep breaths as she watches you pack some of your clothes.

"B-Baby, s-stop," she tries to plead, but you ignore her, and shake her hand off when she tries to grab your arm. You've just been grabbing things at random, but you need to get out of this house, now, so you can only hope that you've grabbed enough pants, shirts, dresses, and pairs of bras and underwear to actually last you a while.

You storm out of the closet and head into the bathroom to grab toiletries. Again, you grab at random, hardly able to see through your tears. And, of course, Mor follows.

"Y/N, p-please stop, we can talk about this, plea-"

You whirl around. "I've said all I needed to say! I'm done, Mor. I'm done."

Mor cries harder, looking down at the floor in utter devastation. The sound of her sobs breaks your heart even more than it already has, and you resist the urge to comfort her, to tell her it's okay, that you two can move on.

Reentering the bedroom, you throw the bag on the bed so that you can zip it up. Mor trails after you, and watches as the love of her life gets ready to leave her.

"Baby, please, I-I love you, so fucking much. I'm sorry, I-I'm so, so sorry," she can hardly get it out from how hard she's crying, and you know that if you turn around, you'll break. So you focus on sliding your bag up your arm and putting your shoes on. When you're ready, you make for the bedroom door, and you practically run down the stairs, eager to get away from the heartbreak tainting the house that was meant to be your home.

Again, Mor grabs your arm before you can open the front door. "Please don't leave, let me make this right," her voice is a whisper, muffled from the congestion caused by her crying.

You close your eyes, you don't turn to look at her. "I love you, Mor, I always will," you hear Mor's breath catch as she waits for you to finish, as she hopes that you'll relent, that you'll put the bag down and take her into your arms and let her explain and apologize and let her change so that she never hurts you again. But you meant what you said, when you told her that you couldn't do it anymore. "But I'm done. I-I'm sorry."

And with that, you're ripping the door open, and leaving into the night.

---

A/N: Whew! That was angsty! Also, just wanna add, I love Emerie! I tried to not make her sound like a female trying to take Mor away from reader, but she is the source of the issue here. Just please know that my characterization of her is not book accurate and was changed for the sake of a fight fic, I love Emerie a lot!

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rosanna-writer · 2 months ago

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for the fic writer asks!! K, M, V, and Z 🩷

(love love love your fics!!!)

hi anon, thank you!!!

K: Do you have a guilty pleasures in fic (reading or writing)? Hmm...this one is a hard one because I'm mostly here to have fun, and my taste often leans towards things that are a bit bonkers/silly. So I'm always a little like, "is it really a guilty pleasure if we're being cheesy on purpose?" But I love all the soulmate identifying mark tropes, "soulmate's injuries appear on your skin," "can't see color until you meet your soulmate," "tattoo of your soulmate's first words appear at birth" etc etc etc

M: What’s the weirdest AU scenario you’ve ever come up with? Did it turn into a story? One of my greatest joys in fandom is taking something I goofed about with friends and turning it into a fic, so yes, my weirdest AUs have def become stories! Goatsand and that temperature fic both came into the world that way <3

(I also can't mention those fics without shouting out a few others that are not by me but are the result of Being A Goof: Lavender Haze by @thesistersarcheron, birds of a feather (we should stick together) by @belabellissima, and the tragic story of the vienna sausage by @itsthedoodle)

V: Are there certain comments you’ve received on your stories that have stuck with you? I've spent a lot of time thinking about recovery and what that looks like while writing we said hello. Everything that Rhys and Feyre go through Under the Mountain is so enormous, and I wanted to do it justice. There are comparatively few fics that explore what Rhys and Feyre healing together would actually look like (though A Court of Faded Dreams by @the-lonelybarricade immediately comes to mind, and LB is legend-fucking-dary for a reason <3), and I think that's because tackling it feels intimidating as an author. So when a commenter told me one of the post-UtM chapters helped them re-live the sense of hope from moment they'd realized their antidepressants kicked in, it meant a lot to me—not only because that's such a vulnerable thing to say and I treasure the fact that they felt safe enough to say it in my comments section, but because it reassured me that I was handling some pretty heavy stuff well in that fic. It still really blows my mind that anything I've written connected to someone on that level.

Z: already answered here <3

#sorry not sorry for the long answers i'm allergic to not recommending things my friends wrote lol #thank you for the questions!!!!

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themusingsofacurlyhairednerd · 4 months ago

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I just want you to know, I’m eating up “Love and War” and your Rhys fics in general.

Sadly, Rhys doesn’t get a lot of love on this app in fan fiction and I get so happy when you post the vamp! Rhys and the “love and war” parts.

I just wanna bite into him, lovingly

Hope you’re doing well and taking care of yourself sweetheart💜💜

This made my day!! 🫶🏻 I’m so glad you’re enjoying them! Rhys really is my comfort character and I figured if I couldn’t find fics to read about him then I might as well write them myself 😂

More parts of Love and War and the Vamp!Rhys will be coming soon, I’m trying to get myself on a schedule to post more regularly, ‘cause I know I’m all over the place 😅 Thank you for sticking with me through the madness 🫶🏻

#rhysand x reader #asks

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ennawrite · 7 months ago

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Thanks for the tag @sonics-atelier (& someone else but i can’t find the post😭)!!

Answer the questions below & tag whoever you want, or make it an open tag!!

Who's your favourite ACOTAR character?

Nesta & Lucien. Tamlin is at the top as well :)

Who's your least favourite character?

Amren. She is not interesting to me at all. I can forgive a lot but I draw the line at boring characters.

Say something nice about your least favourite character.

I think she could be a cool character but SJM hasn’t given us much in regards to the IC, even though they’ve been part of the series since the second book. Maybe she can rectify that in the next few books but I’m losing hope, especially after HOFAS🤷‍♀️

Who's your favourite High Lord? (If you picked one for your fav character, then who's your second fav!)

I absolutely adore Tarquin. I think he has the potential to be a really good HL, especially since the bar is so low😭

Favourite MINOR character?

Probably Jurian, if he counts as a minor character lol. The Bone Carver too, though his death was very anticlimactic for being a DEATH god lmao

Favourite ship? (Crackships included!)

Tamsand, Azris, Targwyn when it comes to crackships. Elucien for real ships!!

Favourite court and why?

I loveee the beach so I love the Summer Court, I feel like it’d be so nice there. I also really like Tarquin & Cresseida and I just know they’d be so fun to party with

Make up a brand new court RIGHT NOW, NO PREP JUST VIBES.

I’m making a court for the girlies, gays & theys. No straight men allowed.

What relationship would you have wanted to see more of in the books?

I wanna see more of Tamlin & Rhys rectifying their past friendship. I would also like to see Lucien/Eris & their mother interacting.

What's your unpopular opinion?

I don’t really LOVE any of the mating pairs we’ve gotten so far, but I’m still a ride or die for Elucien. But also, I loved the idea of feysand & nessian until they actually got together and now I’m doubting SJM’s ability to write a good, healthy romantic relationship. Which is a bit ironic.

What's your favourite headcanon/fan canon?

That Tamlin & Rhys had a brief, violently passionate love affair hundreds of years ago and that’s why there’s so much tension between them (outside of the family murders lol). On the flip side, I also like the idea of Tamlin having a romantic relationship with Rhys’s sister and that she didn’t really, but escaped through the Starlight pool w/ her mother and Tamlin glamoured random heads to look like theirs. That HC gives me peace because it actually utilizes the magical element in these books lmao

If you were swept away to Prythian, what's ONE thing you would want to do?

Oh baby I’m going to all of the Soltice parties. Especially in Spring & Summer. I’m avoiding all the warnings and heading straight to the faerie wine. And then I’m gonna stick realllll close to Tamlin during Calanmai 😏

If you could have ONE faerie ability seen in the books, which would it be?

Ooh probably shapeshifting. I know we haven’t seen too much of it from Tamlin or Feyre (which is a shame) but Lysandra from ToG made it seem so badass. I love it. Also, winnowing sounds amazing.

Again, I’m late to the party so consider this an obligatory tag to YOU if you haven’t done this yet :)

#acotar game #acotar #tag game

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bookofmirth · 11 months ago

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I read your post:

https://www.tumblr.com/bookofmirth/646547823980101632/everyone-is-forgetting-this-very-important-thing

And I think this dynamic, Az & Gwyn training each other, would be interesting. They’re both competitive and Gwyn did actually show some spy qualities in the Blood Rite. I could see Gwyn becoming comfortable around male touch this way. And in Silver Flames, I can’t remember which chapter, I believe Azriel said Gwyn wanted dagger handling lessons and he gave them to her. Idk if it was just them or other Priestesses, but…

“Which to me means that Az isn't going to train Gwyn, they are going to train each other. He will train her on Illyrian techniques and she will train him on Valkyrie techniques and I just think that's really sexy of them to be able to train each other.”

Gwynriel are going to be that battle couple that wipes blood off of each other’s faces. I honestly want a scene where Az tries to show Gwyn something, but she does it better and kinda hands him his ass. I feel like she wouldn’t be afraid to call him out and walk on eggshells around him. Someone, other than Rhys, needs to.

People think that a gwynriel book would be acosf (redux) but no? Gwyn is already Corinthian, and so is Azriel. Any training that happens would be on equal footing, not master/student. I'm rereading acosf and the idea that Gwyn (and Emerie, and all the other Valkyries) would be where Nesta was, barely able to plank for 30 seconds, is laughable. They've been training, babes! The Valkyries, especially Nesta, Emerie, and Gwyn, don't need Intro to Fighting With Swords 101.

If anything, Gwyn and Emerie and Nesta will bring their own lessons to the Illyrians. They will continue training because Cassian and Azriel said that they will do so, to correct any mistakes the women made in the Blood Rite, but really - one, there aren't many mistakes when they WON the thing, and two, training is a constant presence in Cassian and Azriel's lives. They don't just get ripped and it sticks for life, you have to exercise consistently. Imagine, "oh yeah, I was in a war a couple hundred years ago, I think I'm still good, no need to exercise or train" lolol So it will now be a constant presence in the Valkyries' lives, especially for those who decide to stick with the group and make it a big part of their lives.

It's definitely going to be like you said, more of a give and take situation, they are both competitive as hell and it's going to provide for some funny smugness.

#gwynriel #acotar #ask #anon

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acourtofthought · 8 months ago

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is acotar third person limited? because i am seeing posts about feyre being unreliable and being influenced by rhysand. has the author said anything about what kind of POV the series will be having? i think a clarification from her could set some things straight about the series because i am seeing very valid yet conflicting interpretations of the series.

also can you recommend anybody who makes good character analysis in the fandom? this is more for enrich my reading experience with the books. thnx

The first three books are a first person POV and SF is a dual POV but from a third-person limited style of writing rather than a third-person omniscient POV

"First-person perspective typically takes on a limited perspective—the story is told directly, and only, from the narrator's internal thoughts, feelings, and personal experiences. This means the entire story has a limited view of how the character sees and experiences the world."

In third-person limited: "There’s a clue in the name of this point of view: limited. In third-person limited, you stick to one character’s perspective and are “zoomed in” on them.

The only way there's not going to be some bias to these characters' perspectives is if the style were written in third-person omniscient (which this series is not).

"In third-person omniscient, we still use third person (he did this, she did that, they did this). However, omniscient is “zoomed out”. The narrative doesn’t come from the point of view of any one character. It comes from the point of view of an external, godlike narrator, who knows everything about the story and its characters.

This means that the narrator can enter anyone’s mind, and is more detached from the story. This narrator can provide a perspective that the characters can’t. For example, they can give knowledge of future events that haven’t happened yet (to use a very hackneyed example: “little did they know, the worst was yet to come…”). They know everything about the characters and their situations."

While I don't think Feyre has been brainwashed by Rhys, I do think that it's evident she's seeing him through biased lenses, which is colored by her emotions at any given time throughout the series. At first he was evil, wicked, someone to fear. Later he was good, kind, self-sacrificing, etc. Tamlin was at first someone to fear, then someone to love, then someone to hate. Lucien was at first arrogant and vain, then a loyal friend, then someone whose training had "festered" and who had abandoned her, then he was back to being a good male, Elain was at first someone who didn't quite grasp things and never thought to get her hands dirty than later she was someone who was wise and generous, someone who does act with bravery when she has to.

The same can be said of Nesta, even from a third-person POV. At first she hated Feyre, hated Amren for siding with Feyre, thought Cassian was a bastard-born nobody, thought Elain was a dog, hated Rhys, he was a preening asshole and Feyre was only there spending her mates money. Later Nesta loved Feyre, realized Amren had only ever tried to be her friend, acknowledged Elain was the only person who had maybe truly grasped who Nesta was, wanted Cassian from the moment she met him, acknowledged that Rhys had only ever tried to help her (etc).

These characters opinions might be valid for them at various points throughout the series but it doesn't mean they're actually able to see the other characters as they truly are. The other characters aren't the ones who drastically changed over the course of Feyre or Nesta's stories, it's Feyre and Nesta's thoughts that changed because of the growth they have and that's reflected in how they view the world around them. But even now, we can see they're not capable of seeing things through a truly unbiased lense. For example, Feyre embraced the "Court of Dreams" nickname while making fun of the "Band of Exiles" for their name. There's really no difference between the two, it's two groups of people giving themselves a moniker yet Feyre insults only one and that's because she's experiencing emotions over the thought of Lucien choosing to live away from the NC which hurts her. Similarly, Nesta experienced this heartfelt moment with Rhys in SF, notes how he was showering her with mating presents, proclaiming she'd found her home in the NC, her home in the HOW, how she was finally where she belonged, but all of a sudden there's this weird tension between Nesta and the IC in HOFAS, how she's always in trouble with them.

At this end of the day, I think the reader has to step into the role of the third person "omniscient" narrator looking, not at the thoughts of Feyre or Nesta or Cassian, but the overall actions of all the characters to sort through their personal bias from what is actually true.

I am primarily be a Elain / Lucien blogger and most of who I follow are primarily Eluciens and Gwynriels so I'm not sure I could give any good recommendations of bloggers who deep dive into Feyre though @olenvasynyt has a few TikTok videos on her (but they're mostly in relation to her relationship with Lucien). However, I'll add on that if anyone who sees this can make a suggestion, please add a comment for my anon ❤️

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daisychains111 · 8 months ago

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live "tweet" books with me (via the Goodreads progress bar) pt. 5 A Court of Wings and Ruin by Sarah J. Maas

(the first two books plus Frost and Starlight can be found in part 4/4.5)

Alis and Lucian don't believe her "I was a prisoner at night court" BS for one second, and I love that for them

I'm gonna miss Alis...I love her 😭😭

I'm a very enthusiastic Lucian and Elaine fan...I want them to work, even if I know they won't

I'm also an AVID Cassian and Nesta fan....SWOON

once again declaring my absolute distaste of using males, females, and "my mate"

"oversized bat who throws temper tantrums" Nesta is an icon

"Eventually, Mor and Nesta are gonna be besties....I can feel it in my soul

would love for feyre and Nesta to finish their sister heart-to-heart

Alis better be alive somewhere bc istg if Sarah killed that sweet lady I'll riot. also, Tarquin needs to get the stick out of his ass

hehe, Nesta's worried about Cassian

BOOO HISSSSS TAMLIN

literally just fuck him, derogatory

see you used man one time and it was grand then you had to go and correct yourself...bitch ass omagaverse simp

Nesta verbally annihilating Tamlin is my new favorite thing

I'm quickly becoming Nesta's biggest fan

feyre you really just showed every single one of your cards.... those old bastards totally deserved it tho so good on you

girl, you're 20 and married...literally stfu

WOOAAHHH AFFAIR BABY LUCIAN

Nesta doesn't give two shits about the high lord title. she'll tell you to stfu if she feels like it

hehe feyre making fun of Nesta for Cassian will never not be hilarious

HA scary overgrown bat men scared of Nesta

I do not believe that Jurian is on their side, lying until proven not a jerk...also FUCK TAMLIN

you better knock it off with this Mor and Cassian tension...gross

good riddance Ianthe you bitch

not you genuinely making me feel sad about the surial....brutal

absolutely not...Mor and feyre will not be fighting about this...I refuse

awwww Amren and the summer court guy (varian)....cutie pop

SARAH IF YOU HURT SWEET ELAIN I WILL MAIM YOU

damn...if tamlin dies rn trying to redeem himself rn, I just might have to forgive him for being a fuckass

hehe sister hug

hehe elain and azriel

how I didn't realize Mor liked girl is absolutely beyond me...my gaydar is EXTREMELY lacking bc fucking duh

awwww they're holding hanndddsssss

if any one of them dies I'm gonna kill you

if Nesta kisses Cassian bc she thinks they're gonna die I'll forgive Sarah of all her sins

YUUUHH FATHER DEAREST FOR THE ABSOLUTE WIN

once again Nesta saying fuck you and your title I do as I please...icon

AMREN WTF

YAY KISSING WHEN WE THINK WERE GONNA DIE...you're not forgiven tho, not til they both live

YES ELAIN YUUUHHH

goddammit Amern 😭😭

I'm like 80% sure that Rhys doesn't actually die BUT ISTG IF HE DIES RN

AYAY RHYS STAYS ALIVE AND YAY AMREN IS NOT GONE AND YAY

shout out to Tamlin...you're officially redeemed

rip the Tamlin and Lucian bromance

(Afterthought in post-production, WTF happened to Alis. She just disappeared from the planet and I'm not amused.)

I'm starting Silver Flames tomorrow so stay tuned for then hehe (even though I literally should just do my how instead of reading lol)

#acotar #a court of wings and ruin #feyre archeron #rhysand #feyre x rhysand #elain acotar #elain x azriel #nesta archeron #nesta x cassian #goodreads #live tweeting #a court of fey and flowers #a court of silver flames #a court of mist and fury #a court of thorns and roses #cassian #morrigan acotar #azriel shadowsinger #amren acotar

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iambutmortal · 1 year ago

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Chapter 4 for @elucienweekofficial Day 5: Sunshine

Summary: When Elain signs the divorce papers she’s sure she’s done with Lucien Vanserra. Until they’re offered the chance to recreate their honeymoon as a part of her job. For free. But reliving all those memories with Lucien proves leaving may be more difficult than she thought.

Word Count: 2.8k

Authors Note: I had a bit of a brain crash yesterday, so this was supposed to be for day four. I'm either going to post three chapters in the next two days, or two longer chapters to make up for it, sorry.

Read on Ao3 | Chapter 1 | Chapter 2 | Chapter 3

True to Lucien’s word, Elain was confined to the bed for overnight, while he ran around actin as a dutiful nursemaid and she grumbled and complained.

“I don’t think laying under an umbrella outside is going to change anything,” Elain moaned, for what felt like the thousandth time. “And I’m sick of this room.”

“Too bad,” Lucien said, handing her a mug of tea. “Interview is in three hours and you’re not stepping foot outside until then.”

“But—”

“Nope,” Lucien said. “And both Nesta and Cassian agreed before you start complaining about how mean I am. You need rest.”

Elain pouted, but took a sip of her tea. She felt the warmth work its way down her throat, and was relieved to find the sip didn’t leave her running to the bathroom. After a night of sleep her stomach had settled considerably, but she would much rather play it safe than sorry.

“Can I at least start to get ready?”

Lucien huffed and glanced down at his phone. “Give it another twenty minutes. I’ll get you a piece of toast to gnaw on.”

Elain muttered something rude at him, but grabbed the kindle from where she’d discarded it across the bed. She was still only halfway through the book she’d started on the plane, and the heroine had ended up in a small town. With her ex. Really it was getting far too realistic for her tastes.

Lucien, cruel warden, did relent when he came back and saw Elain was managed to keep the bread down.

“Go take a shower.”

Elain practically bounded out of bed, slamming the door on him.

“But sit down when you blow dry your hair,” he shouted at the wood.

Elain opened the door a crack, just enough to show him her middle finger.

Lucien’s laughter followed her, something warm burning in her chest. She did concede to sit on the bed to do her hair, definitely for Lucien and not because she felt a little light headed after standing on her feet for too long.

“Ready,” Lucien asked, when the clock hit four. He’d thrown on a pale yellow polo shirt and stiff tan pants, to match the white and yellow flowered sundress Elain had pulled out to wear. His hair was back in a neat ponytail, a few strands escaping to frame his face.

“Do we look home and garden approved?” Elain asked, sticking the last bobby pin in her hair. She’d done her best appropriation of beach waves, pinning the front sections gracefully behind her ears.

Cassian wasn’t officially on the job as photographer, but image had more power than anything in an interview.

“We’d fit right in Cassian’s magazine,” Lucien said, offering her a hand.

Elain took it, letting him pull her to her feet. And then held it as they walked through the resorts, savoring the feeling of calluses earned from the gym against her fingertips. Outside the air was so humid she could feel her hair curling in rebellion, frizzing around her temples. She cursed herself for not bringing anything to tame it with.

She reached up a hand to try and smooth it down.

“Your hair looks fine,” Lucien whispered, before throwing open the door to the conference room they’d be using.

Elain was almost instantly wrapped in a hug. “Oh my gosh it’s been so long,” gushed Mor, giving Elain a squeeze before pulling back to embrace Lucien.

“I didn’t know you were coming,” Elain said. She had met Rhys’ cousin a handful of times, at the wedding and a few dinners around the holidays, whenever she could come from New York and had always liked the blonde woman. They’d had several long conversations over coffee on the latest fashion trends, or whatever celebrity was currently acting like a fool.

“I wasn’t,” Mor said. “But when I heard Viviane had you as an assignment I made her switch. She’s currently in Brazil covering fashion week.”

“That’s a hell of a trade on her part,” Lucien said, lacing his fingers with Elain’s and leading them over to the makeshift interview space set up. Three chairs, for Elain, Lucien, and Cassian, who was joining them later, stood across from the one Mor had already draped her red purse across.

“But I get to see you guys,” Mor replied, sweeping elegantly into her seat. “So I think I got the better deal.” She reached into her purse to pull out a small notebook and pen, both matching red, and flipped to an open page. “So,” she said, clicking the pen. “How are things going?”

“Good,” Elain squeaked.

Mor’s eyebrows arched dangerously close to her hairline. “Just good? A sharp decline from Christmas then.”

Elain could feel her face burning under the scrutiny.

Lucien tightened his grip on her hand, placing it on top of his thigh. “We’re in paradise, all expenses paid, with each other. What could be wrong?” His voice was innocently neutral, a perfect deflection of the question. God he would make such a good politician.

Mor tilted her head, golden blonde hair sliding over her shoulder in a silky sheet. “Alright, so what makes here paradise?”

“It was the first place we went while being married,” Elain said, meeting Mor’s brown eyes. “So it’s always going to have good memories associated with it.”

Mor tapped her pen against the notepad. “Bad answer. You could have stayed anywhere after your wedding. Why here?”

“Because I’ve always loved the beach,” Elain admitted. “We only got to go twice growing up because of money and both times it was magical seeing that much open water. Lucien took me to Santa Monica for our second date, so it only made sense to come to a beach for our honeymoon.”

Mor was nodding along to her story, scribbling furiously with her pen. “And Lucien? Why this resort?”

He cleared his throat. “I like to see Elain happy. And she never stopped smiling on our honeymoon.”

Mor gave a disapproving hum and Elain was reminded of why Mor was the top of the top in the industry. Every other interviewer would have gushed over that answer, and how romantic it was.

“And I didn’t get the chance to make a lot of good memories as a child,” Lucien continued after a moment. Because he’d grown up with his step father, Beron, who was by all accounts horrible. “So anytime I get to see someone I love happy I get a strong attachment to the place.”

“And how do you feel being back now?”

“It’s…different,” Elain said. Mor gestured for her to go on. “After three years we’re in a new place in our relationship retreading someplace old.”

“New good or new bad?” Mor asked.

“Just new,” Lucien answered quickly.

“So bad.” Mor underlined something on her notepad. “Elaborate.”

“It’s called a honeymoon period for, I don’t think people can be expected to stay in it forever,” Elain said defensively. “Not three years after the actual honeymoon.”

“Feyre and Rhys are still in theirs.”

“They’re the exception,” Elain said. “The rest of us don’t live in a fairytale.”

“Hard truth for a story about a fairytale honeymoon,” Mor said softly.

Elain was saved from responding by a knock on the door.

“Just a minute,” Mor called.

Cassian walked in anyway. “You’d leave me in the hall like a dog? I’m wounded.”

Mor rolled her eyes, but stood to press a kiss to his cheeks. “I missed you, you big oaf,” she said.

“Move back to LA then,” Cassian begged, taking the third seat. “Then I’ll never leave you alone.”

“Absence makes the heart grow fonder.” Mor flipped to a fresh page. “We’ll come back to that conversation later.” She gave Elain a pointed look. “For now, Cassian, what’s the best part of working here?”

Cassian launched into a spirited discussion about the lighting and angles the resort offered, how he framed his shots, and what he was planning tomorrow when they went into the jungle.

“A lot of houses today are sharp angles,” he finished, “which is interesting, how do you make set shapes look dynamic, but this is just so different and it’s really pushing me to the limits.”

“Amazing,” Mor muttered. She looked up. “Anything to add, Nesta?”

Elain turned around to see her sister standing in the doorway. She’d been so engrossed in Cassian’s explanation about his work she hadn’t noticed her arrival.

Nesta cleared her throat. “I hadn’t quite realized how much work Cassian put into this, it’s nice to know I can trust my sister to him. I always thought this was just some blow off beach job for him.”

Cassian shook his head. “It was never a blow off job, Nes. None of them were.”

Nesta looked the most regretful Elain had ever seen her.

“So,” Mor said, “then what is it like to work with Cassian?”

Lucien was nice enough to take that question, gushing about how good of a director Cassian was while Cassian looked sheepishly pleased with himself.

Elain watched over his shoulder as Nesta slipped out of the doorway and back into the hall, with one final look towards Cassian, and made a mental note to talk to her about it later.

Mor worked her way through several more questions, teasing answers out of Elain, Lucien, and Cassian, until Cassian’s phone buzzed in his pocket. He pulled it out with a frown, scanning the message before quickly typing out a response.

“Is there a problem?” Mor asked.

“Sorry,” Cassian said apologetically, setting the phone down face first on the chair arm. Only to pick it right back up when it buzzed again. “I sent some concept photos in and they’re just now getting back to me.”

Mor nodded, waving for him to carry on, and turned back to Lucien to discuss what his possible political career held. Cassian was still typing, his frown deepening.

Elain leaned towards him. “What’s wrong,” she hissed.

Cassian startled. “It’s nothing.”

“Is it about what happened yesterday?” Elain asked, feeling guilty all over again.

Cassian shook his head emphatically. “Absolutely not. It’s something I’ll handle.”

His phone rang and he sighed deeply. “I have to take this,” he whispered, sliding out of the room.

Mor and Lucien were still deep in conversation, and Elain made the split second decision to follow Cassian out. She had no doubt it was about yesterday, and had every intention of begging for forgiveness to the producers.

She made sure to shut the door behind her, lest Lucien find out and chastise her for making it her responsibility.

Cassian was pacing the hall, agitated. “I’m not doing it,” Cassian snarled at whoever was on the other end of the line. “So tell them to shove it.” A long pause. “What do you want me to say? Sorry your face looks like that, I'm only photographing the other side from now on?”

White hot anger shot through Elain at the words. She’d never quite understood the concept of seeing red before now, but her body felt like it was on fire. She cleared her throat, catching Cassian’s attention, and motioned for him to mute the phone.

“Tell them I’ll walk,” Elain said. “I’ll walk and they’ll have none of their photos then if they want to say a single thing about Lucien.”

“Elain—”

“And tell them that I’ll also make sure everyone knows what ablest assholes they are.”

“I can’t—”

“Tell them,” Elain ground out.

Cassian unmuted the phone and put it on speaker. “It’s going to be a no from Ms. Vanserra on retaking from a different angle.”

“Tell Ms. Vanserra she’s not the one in charge of this shoot.”

Elain cleared her throat. “Well Ms. Vanserra would like to remind everyone that her brother in law is Rhysand Night, and I’m sure he has a magazine that would love to cover what Cosmopolitan had to say about people with facial scarring.”

Elain could almost hear silent panic on the other end of the line. Because Rhys’ dad had given him full control over their media empire, and he was currently trying to expand into the fashion space. Something Elain was sure had the executives on the line very, very worried.

“I think there’s been a miscommunication,” said a voice through the speakers after a pregnant pause. “We just wanted to make sure Cassian was capturing a full range photos from all perspectives. To make sure he wasn’t missing something special”

“I think Cassian’s photos are very special,” Elain countered. “Especially with the framing he chose to use.”

Another long pause. “Looking at them again, I think you might be right, Ms. Vanserra.”

“I know,” Elain said, her tone far too prissy for any model. There went her reputation for being easy to work with. “I’m glad we could come to an understanding.”

Cassian took the phone off speaker to say a few farewell remarks and then hung up.

“This is a new side of you, El,” he said.

Elain flushed. “Sorry.”

“No, no, I like it.” Cassian swung open the door. “Besides, knowing your sisters I shouldn’t be shocked.”

They both took their seats. Mor didn’t miss a beat, shifting her attention back onto Cassian to ask about the logistics of planning a shoot like this.

“All good?” Lucien whispered as soon as Elain sat down.

Elain smiled weakly. “Peachy.”

“Okay,” Mor said, slamming her notebook shut. “That’s all I need for now.”

“Really?” Elain asked.

“No, but I have a dinner reservation with Cassian in twenty minutes,” she said with a wink. “And I have both your emails if you need anything else.”

“Plus you two also have a dinner to get to,” Cassian added.

“Do we?” Lucien asked slyly.

“A little treat from us,” Mor said. “For putting up with my questions. And yes, what you have on is fine.”

“Now go,” Cassian said, shooing them off. “Do something fun that’s not photographed.”

“Roger,” Lucien said, taking Elain’s hand and pulling her out of the room. Elain had a sneaking suspicion Lucien was in on it as he led her straight to the beachside restaurant in the resort and to a table overlooking the sea, candles already lit. The same one they’d sat at on the second night of their honeymoon.

“You know,” he said after they sat, “you’re sexy when you’re angry.”

“You weren’t supposed to hear that,” Elain said, mortified.

Lucien shrugged. “You don’t need to spare me. I already knew they were thinking it.”

“They shouldn’t have been,” Elain muttered. “Assholes.”

“See,” Lucien leaned back in his chair. “Sexy.”

“And it’s not sparing you it’s—” Elain searched for the word.

“Sparing.”

Elain sighed. “Okay maybe a little.”

“You can tell me things,” Lucien said, eyes imploring.

Elain smiled at him weakly. “It’s just hard for me sometimes,” she admitted. “I don’t want to rock the boat.”

“Calm waters are boring. Speaking of which,” Lucien’s eyes gleamed, “how long after dinner will it take for Nesta to find Cassian alone somewhere.”

Elain choked. “Oh god, you don’t think—” Lucien raised an eyebrow. “An hour, max.”

He snorted. “Ten dollars says he leaves halfway through dinner.”

“Twenty says he tries and Mor makes him wait.”

Lucien held out his hand. “Deal.” They shook on it. Their hands hung suspended, neither willing to let go. Lucien��s thumb ran down Elain’s skin, causing her to shiver slightly. It felt like middle school all over again, with how agitated she was getting by mere contact with Lucien. My romantic life has reverted to hand holding. Perfect.

“Dinner menu?” asked the waiter, appearing with copies in arm.

Elain went to drop Lucien’s hand but he tightened his grip, resting their hands atop the table. Another stroke of his thumb.

“We’ll take whatever you recommend,” he said, not looking at the waiter. His gaze was focused entirely on Elain, with an intensity that made her feel like she was burning.

“Of course sir,” said the waiter before disappearing.

“Your stomach feel okay?” Lucien asked.

Elain nodded. “I’m starving honestly. I think I could eat anything you put in front of me.”

“Good,” Lucien admitted. “Because I have no clue what I just asked for.”

Elain feigned shock. “And I thought you were so smooth too.”

“I aim to impress.”

Thankfully, the waiter had an excellent pallet, and the evening passed quickly, the two of them talking so easily Elain could almost convince herself the last couple months weren’t real. That this was their relationship.

And on the way out of the restaurant Lucien slid an arm around Elain’s shoulders. She leaned against him, resting her head on his chest. “You don’t have to set the pillow wall up tonight if you don’t want to.”

“Trust us to behave ourselves then?”

Elain hummed. “We’re both adults aren’t we.”

“I do want to do very adult things to you, yes,” Lucien said.

“That’s not what I meant,” Elain protested, smacking his chest.

Lucien pressed a kiss to her forehead. “I know. But let me have my fun.”

Elain rolled her eyes, but didn’t pull away.

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