#sry for weird formatting

[wickedworm]

hey all! i know its been a minute but i was writing this little cringe ass blurb and havent finished it. i got some inspiration from the lovely @golden-gypsy after she sent me an ask nearly a year ago 😅 this has been living in my drafts for a while. im not sure if ill finish it unforunately. things have been weird and ive been going through my adhd cycle of interests where i dump the last one and move onto the next. anyway, enjoy whatever the hell this is.

December, 1994

Jerry

This is fucking pathetic. It's midnight, it's freezing, and I'm alone on the street, calling my wife on a payphone.

I stood out in the freezing Seattle cold, clutching a payphone as I called my wife. I wanted to laugh at myself for how pitiful it all seemed. I've barely talked to her - shit, I haven't even seen her since I went to Oklahoma. We talked on the phone but I never had much to say. And I didn't really know what to say. But I thought about her. I thought about her all the fucking time. And I would've actually talked to her, made that effort, had I felt worthy of it. I didn't deserve it. It wasn't fair to her. I needed to get my shit together.

When I came back to Washington, I tried to give Raven - and myself - plenty of time. I didn't want to go home right away, I wanted to try to get back into the swing of things. I set up some dates to write and rehearse with Sean and Mike. When that all fell through, I got pretty discouraged. I went from motel to motel, couch to couch, trying to write some of my own stuff. I was pretty much living in my car for that whole week. And I just wrote. A lot. I wrote about everything, but especially her. It felt like I would never stop.

And it hit me that I had freewill. I could just go to her. I could turn on the engine and drive home.

I was sitting in my car that night, trying to get at least a little sleep. But I couldn't stop thinking of Raven. I thought maybe I could get to sleep easier thinking of her. I imagined her next to me, leaning on my

shoulder and pointing at stars through the windshield. Tracing out constellations I've never heard of with her finger.

"Are you sure?" I asked, trying not to sound or feel like a begging dog.

"Just come home, Jer."

I'm not ready. I can't go back. I don't deserve her. I can't break her heart anymore.

Her voice, even over the crackling of the payphone, was soft and tired. But soothing. I could imagine her face, resembling her voice. There was moonlight shining through the window and over her face,

reflecting in her eyes. I pictured her holding the phone in one hand, and with her other hand she twirled and tangled the cord between her fingers.

"I just- I d-don't-" Fuck.

I leaned my head against the steering wheel, hoping the cold leather against my forehead would help me think straight.

I slammed the phone down. What the fuck is wrong with me? I can't even get a full sentence out and I'm completely sober. She wants me home. I don't know what to do. I went back to my car and threw

the door shut.

'Just come home, Jer.'

Her voice repeated in my head. Her soft, gentle voice. Just come home.

I sat back up. Ok, I'm going home.

Raven

I sat on the porch steps, waiting in the dark and cold for Jerry. I fidgeted with the frayed edge of the blanket I wrapped myself in, couldn't help but feel nervous. What would I see in front of me when he arrives? Would he look the same? Sound and feel the same? Or would he be completely different? It had only been a year since I'd seen him, but was that normal for a married couple? Maybe it was,

considering our circumstances. But I'd be lying if I said I didn't spend that year worried sick about him. And I'd definitely be lying if I said I didn't miss him. It tore me up to see him the way he was before

he left. And it tore me up to not see him at all.

Over the phone, he tried to make it sound like he didn't need help. If only he knew just how much I can see through his bullshit. I mean, he articulated his emotions very well, he wasn't afraid to show or

tell people how he felt. But in the past few years, there were times when he really shut down. Especially when Layne started to lose himself.

I blamed myself a lot for what happened. I thought if I kept myself calm and collected, Jerry maybe wouldn't have left the way he did. I remember I could physically feel my heart breaking when I watched

him storm out of the door. I know he wouldn't have done that had he not been under so much pressure. He couldn't take anymore of it.

I must have fallen asleep on the porch waiting for him. I jumped awake at the sound of him shutting his truck door. I immediately shivered, noticed it was snowing. Through the flakes, I looked up at Jerry. The fading porch light just barely made him visible.

I remember I called Sean a few hours after Jerry left the house and felt my stomach drop when he said he hadn't seen him. Then he called me the next morning saying he turned up at his apartment,

hungover and soaking wet from the rain. He put Jer on the phone, he told me he was sorry and he was going to leave for a while. Then he told me he loved me and hung up. He didn't let me get a word in.

I was relieved that he was ok. But I was scared, too. And even still, I wasn't sure what of.

"Have you been out here this whole time?" He took a few steps toward me.

His voice. It's him.

I jumped up to my feet and nearly tackled him to the ground. He lifted me up off the ground into his arms. I squeezed as hard as I could, needing to feel him to make sure he was real and that he was ok. I breathed in his scent, the usual old spice and tobacco.

"Come on." He held me close to him and carried me inside.

"I missed you," He whispered into my hair and hugged me tight. "I'm sorry for everything."

I don't know what came over me but I just couldn't let go. I felt a lump in my throat and I didn't bother holding it back, he couldn't see me cry anyway. Not with my face buried deep in his jacket. I could

barely breathe but I didn't care.

He set me down and I grabbed his face before I could even put my feet on the ground. I've been waiting for those words.

"What took you so long?" I could barely get it out, I choked through the words.

"I'm sorry."

I didn't want to go back to that.

I'm sorry I'm sorry I'm sorry. He said it but why didn't it feel like enough? In the months before he left, I spent more nights alone in bed than I did with him next to me, where he was supposed to be. He

was somewhere else, doing God knows what at God knows where. There were days where I'd be worried sick about him, only for him to show up drunk later that night.

Jerry

"God, I missed you." She whispered, her voice just barely audible in the quiet of the house.

She didn't let go for a long time, and I just let her. She had to be freezing. I could feel the sting of her cold fingers against my neck as she held onto me. I shut the door behind us with my foot and felt the

warmth of the house envelop us. When I set her down, she pulled away and looked at me. I saw my wife for the first time in a year. And she looked the same. Did I think she'd be different?

"You ok?" Her voice was small, but I could sense her concern.

Her cheeks were red and cold. I didn't even realize I was touching her face until she leaned into my hand. Flecks of white snow dotted her dark curls and I wiped one away from her eyebrow. Even in the

cold winter, the freckles spread across her face were still prominent. Like a beam of sunlight always followed her. I just stared. I felt like a little kid, gawking at a beautiful girl.

I snapped out of whatever trance I was in, just enough to nod and reassure her.

"Ok." She mouthed.

Raven

I traced my fingers over his face, his stubble. I smiled to myself, realizing his goatee was gone. He knew I hated it.

"I like this." I told him while holding his jaw.

He chuckled. "Yeah. I know."

[doyl1st]

CSI Prompts // Still Accepting @poxsonmenace said: "you just made yourself useful."

"Oh, did I?"

The sarcasm with which Isaac speaks is as clear as a bell. Had this man been speaking to his endearingly desperate brother, his statement certainly would have been received more positively. To Isaac, though, the thinly veiled threat behind it is as laughable as it is evident.

“Cant say I really give a fuck, unfortunately. You’re of no use to me, and I’m not afraid of you. So really, I’m of no use to you.

[kaddyssammlung]

I don't think I know this one.

weird format sry

[moonlight-makes-great-cocktail]

Loser Ellie brain rot…

____________________________________________

Erm not too much! Silly Ellie head cannons >~< fairly short. Also! New to posting on tumblr not to writing, so I’m sorry if the format or whatever is booty. I am LEARNING if you are not NICE I’ll BLOCK YOU.

Tw: erm mild nsfw, big fag behaviour. Not proof read I’m sorry cuties. Dyslexic writer sry gush 😞😞

____________________________________________

Loser!ellie who you met in the university library after she opened her Dr Pepper too loud then went ‘woops’ even louder making you giggle.

Loser!ellie who on your first date to a local coffee shop ordered a vanilla Frappe with a pump of salted caramel and extra whipped cream and THEN had the audacity to add sugar.

Loser!ellie who asked you to be her girlfriend on your second date.

Loser!ellie who will bring up being a lesbian every chance she gets. She’s so proud of it you’d think she’d worked hard for it.

Loser!ellie who has insane beef with your stuffed animals. Every time she comes over her face falls to a erugh when she sees your poor innocent djungelskog who’s done nothing wrong but she still yanks him off the bed. When you leave to go to the bathroom or whatever she’ll punch him and trash talk him.

Loser!ellie who made you watch all of the Jurassic park movies back to back when you were trying to smash.

Loser!ellie who’s favourite food is a PLAIN burger from a local spot she’s in all the time. And I’m talking no lettuce no tomato no nothing. Though she gets your favourite topping (pickles or whatever) and goes ‘ARUGH they gave it to me by accident. Do you want it?’

Loser!ellie who’s surprisingly buff… which you didn’t expect. Like a month into dating you couldn’t open a jar so you called her over to do it and she popped it off no issue. ‘IM BUFF!’ She insists all the time. Guess it’s true.

Loser!ellie who wears weird ass boxers. Like, Minecraft, Dr Pepper, Simpsons, sonic, ones that have little lesbian flags on them. She honestly doesn’t see why you giggle every time her jeans come off.

Loser!ellie who sleeps in just those boxers and also sleeps like an insane person. You wake up cuz she’s slapped you in her sleep by accident. She talks, moves, kicks duvets off.

Loser!ellie who genuinely finds heterosexual relationships strange. ‘Yeah so my friend and her boyfriend’ you’ll say during a date. ‘Boyfriend?!.. like a lesbian boyfriend?’ ‘…no Ellie like a man.’

Loser!ellie who’s the most loving cutey girlfriend to ever exist. You’ll be out with your friends and she’s got an arm around you, holding your waist, talking about you, kisses, buying you your favourite drink.

Loser!ellie who was a total teenage dirtbag, all her pics from high school are so ??? Like her and her friends in some random park getting high, her in band, her wearing stupid shirts that say ‘I 🩷 eating it nasty’ a little bit of pervert to this day too but… don’t worry about that.

Loser!ellie who hates your exes with a PASSION hates them. Every single one. Don’t know them, doesn’t care to. Insanely jealous especially cuz you don’t talk to any of them at all. In her mind loving you is default so they MUST still be in love with you.

Loser!ellie who’s main instagram is BARE. like 100 followers a profile pic, a single photo dump nothing. Her priv on the other hand…. Another question.

Loser!ellie who’s private insta account is ‘lesbiandinosfromouterspace’ and her profile pic is a picture of Micheal cera.

Loser!ellie who posts you all the time. Like 5 pictures of you sleeping -you hate them she thinks they’re cute but the account only has 20 followers so it’s not that deep- and the caption is ‘have you ever seen an angel sleep’

Loser!ellie who posts her art of you

-NSFW-

Loser!ellie who slings the strap around like she was born with it.

Loser!ellie who doesn’t like bottoming too much. She will but only if you ask.

Loser!ellie who will EAT IT whenever you ask. Doesn’t matter. You guys could be laying in bed together and you’ll go ‘..wanna give me head?’ ‘YES GOD YES.’

Loser!ellie who gets naked every time she gives you head even if you’re not having sex.

Loser!ellie who owns MULTIPLE dildos for her harness which was way way too expensive.

Loser!ellie who lurvssss to give you hickeys.

Loser!ellie who has bruised your cervix before and apologised many many times even got you gifts but secretly very very proud of her ability to do that.

Loser!ellie who has a soft spot for finger banging.

Loser!ellie who hates going to the club but if you ask nicely and wear something cute she’ll consider it. And if you get drunk enough and ask nicely she’ll consider taking you to the bathroom of the club.

Loser!ellie who’s aftercare is 100/10.

Loser!ellie who learned all her sex tips from years and years and years of touching herself and reading smut and sheer desperation.

Loser!ellie who the first time you guys had sex and you were gonna finish on her strap she went ‘oh my god oh my god what’s happening? are you cumming? Am I making you cum?!’

[pasteilian]

This is my 1st time ever leaving any sort of ask so sorry if formatting or anything is weird? But are you aware that most of your posts are showing up as "potentially mature content" even when its pretty much a "kid friendly" type of post? Maybe its my tumblr settings or smth somehow, but I figured u should know? sry if this is awkward or anything, have a nice day♡

Ah is it happening again I remember they took it off but tumblr has been acting weird lately for me I don’t know why this keeps happening 😭😭

[driftrz]

the scene is set for honeyed eyes to view : a drink spilled, a stammering attempt at an apology. even from a distance, she can tell jisung is being less - than - charitable. she waits for a moment, a little amused as whoever he's snapping at looks half - ready to cry. or maybe jump him. she’s never been good at telling the difference. the play unfolds and in a split second, she decides she wants to change the script. lifts herself up from her spot at the food court, descending upon the two. really, upon jisung, gently bumping her shoulder against his own.

“ y’gonna start a fight at a mall ? if they kick you out, i’ll let them. might even pretend i don’t know you. ” she chirps, gently teasing. spares barely a glance at the soaked opponent, a silent order : run along. “ come on. i’ll get you a new drink. on me, for all your troubles. ”

open starter to : anyone ! location : aventura mall

sour face ;; long legs . a combination that would certainly soon enough be someone else's problem . quick strides taking jisung to his desired destination ... destinations, actually - that being every designer shop this sorry mall was able to spit out. he'd been here before, of course . countless times . still, there was an undefined satisfaction in simply browsing, taking the time needed to appreciate the art of luxury in peace . that was ... until a swift turn had someone careering straight on into him . not like jisung was actively trying to avoid it, yet he felt utterly distraught by how the hassle lead to the drink, formerly clutched in his hand, now scattered in a wild pattern across the other person's upper body . " christ, man . are you fuckin' stupid ? ", short lived, hissed between his teeth . undeniably his way of charging up . slender fingers came to inspect his own well being before sharp eyes followed the action to consider the other . " actually ... don't care, don't answer that ", eyebrows knit together along with his upper lip curling in a sheer display of distaste . " the color of your pants is making me depressed . "

[rurus-agere-blog]

MEL PACI EDITS!

(Sry the formatting is so weird, the pictures wouldn't load otherwise qwq)

I've seen a saddening lack of Gaslight District agere content, so I'm here to make some! Starting with our energetic baby, Mel!!

I love her so much and I can absolutely see her being a very chaotic kid regressor (7-9 I feel?)

[lightblueminecraftorchid]

HI THERE SRY IF THIS IS WEIRD BUT I SAW UR TAGS AND I LOVE TALKING ABOUT MINIDISCS SO—

they were kinda like floppy discs! you’re not supposed to take them out of their casing, tho you occasionally can get stuff in there and need to clean it out but that’s generally pretty rare. they were made by sony to compete with cassette tapes, but the timing was. not great and the players could cost a pretty penny so. they did actually do really well in japan though, just not the states!

they’re a purely audio format, and basically the draws were a) really good quality, like cd type quality, which is quite a step above the previous cassette tapes, b) they were more portable than cds, and c) at the time, you couldn’t really record cds all too easily. but minidiscs were always meant to be recordable, that was their whole thing. similar to cds, you can’t record on a pre-recorded minidisc (like one from a label company. if just like your brother recorded something on a disc you absolutely can re-record it), but unlike cds you will never find prerecorded minidiscs anywhere so it’s not really an issue lol

the recorders also use a thing called a magneto-optical drive, which is where a laser makes the disc REAL DANG HOT before the magnet writes the data in it, so you don’t have to worry about leaving your discs by magnets the way you might with cassettes!

at first you could only record through a recording line, so if you had a fifty minute album guess who couldn’t use their player for fifty minutes until it was done recording! later though some of the recorders had a thing called netmd, which lets you use files on your computer to record much quicker, without waiting for the whole thing to play out. the discs had a recording time of either 60, 74, or 80 minutes, tho you almost never see 60s around these days. if you wanted to record for longer tho, you could, it really just depends on whether or not you can play it lol. basically later on a bunch of the players were able to use a thing called long play, but some players can’t so your disc will be unreadable to them. but! the discs themselves are always able to record long play no matter when they were made, and you can pretty much endlessly re-record minidiscs without them wearing out. so if your hypothetical brother gives you his old minidiscs and he has crappy taste in music and you have a recorder that can’t play long play, no worries, just re-record them as regular discs and you’ll be good to go! there are two types of long play, lp2 and lp4, and any player that can play long play can play either. as u might guess they double or quadruple your discs recording time respectively, at the loss of some sound quality. it’s not terrible, but also discs aren’t super expensive so the only time i’ve ever really used lp4 is to record several podcast episodes on one disc.

they’re all very pretty like the one in the picture tho!! these are a few of my favorites that i own:

i wish i had a picture of my dad’s one with miffy on it because that one’s very cute too heh. i really like the ones where the disc itself is coloured too! the clear neige at the bottom is one of the most common ones you’ll find, especially if you buy them new you’ll get something similar to it. they don’t actually make the fun coloured ones anymore, :( but you can get boxes of used ones that generally come in all sorts of random fun colours! the players themselves are also pretty cool looking! pls ignore gollum’s reflection there haha!

they do not all look like that lol, but generally the players are nicer looking than the ones that can play and record. (the one in the picture up there can’t record, tho this one can. pretty much all the recorders look something similar to this. the ones that can only play look very neat though)

all the recorders have screens, most of the players don’t, but oftentimes they’ll have remotes that you plug into the player and then plug your headphones into the remote, and those often have screens on them.

when they were first released they could cost you up to like 800 dollars lol, nowadays depending on the player they’ll only set you back around 40 bucks. probably a good quality mp3 player might be more practical, but i like the fun clacky plastic discs lol. plus the recordings almost never get corrupted, which is a plus!

uh anyway i’m so sorry for the tiny essay!! i just really like minidiscs! :)

Op i am holding u by the hand. This is exactly what I wanted. Thank you so much!!!!!!

[jacqui-velazquez]

@nataliavega:

Natalia had not been raised to be open about her feelings. They were her problems and hers alone, and talking about them with other people only made her burden their burden. But she was bursting at the seams with so many things, and Jacqui's offer seemed so genuine. She sighed. "Do you ever wonder if you're not a good person? Like, do you..." She chewed on her bottom lip as she tried to find the right words, wondered if she even wanted to say them at all, "do you ever worry that you're actually selfish and terrible? Is that a universal experience? Because I keep circling this thought in the back of my mind that this was supposed to be so different. I thought college would be different. I've got this really big family and my parents are really religious. And, you know, we didn't have a lot of money or anything, not like the people here, so we didn't have the big house, we didn't got on vacations. It never felt like I had... space. Like physically or mentally, you know? I think I've done a pretty good job at pretending that I know what I'm doing most days, but I thought I'd find myself here. I thought this was supposed to be the time of my life. But it's been such a nightmare. And I'm... mad at Greer for it." The confession was quiet, shameful. "That's messed up, right? Who knows what happened to her. It's awful. And yet, I can't help but resent her. She's not even here and everything is just as much about her as it's always been. I just... wanna be seen, too." As soon as the words were out of her mouth, she regretted them. She wished she could take them all back, stuff all that god awful vulnerability back into the compartment she'd mistakenly released it from. Instead, she could only blink in quiet horror as she stared at the ceiling. "I'm so sorry. It was like I was watching myself outside my own body not shut up and I could do absolutely nothing about it."

@jacqui-velazquez:

Jacqui frowned, thinking over Nat's words for a few moments. She didn't think she was a bad person - though she often wondered about her motives in how she acted, Jacqui did everything possible to be kind to people. To make their way through their lives, at least where their lives would intersect with hers, at least a bit easier. To not add any undue difficulty. But everything else that Nat said....that they could all relate to. Alarmingly well. They glanced over towards Nat, one side of their lips lifted upwards, reaching out to rest a hand on her hand. "You don't need to apologize," Jacqui said gently, patting the back of Nat's hand twice before letting their arm drop back to their side. "I think it's...maybe not fair, but understandable to mad at Greer. Especially if she's....I don't know. Not missing but somewhere of her own free will. But you should never apologize for how you feel. If you don't like it, you still need to feel it. To let it out," they said, eyes growing distant as they spoke, somewhere deep inside their own thoughts - rather than watching themselves outside of their body, like Nat had said, Jacqui retreated further into their own. "And having space from your family.....isn't always a good thing," they offered, blinking back to attention, bestowing Nat with a gentle smile - they should know. They had plenty of space, especially in the later years of their childhood. "And I think everyone doubts what they're doing. But that doesn't fucking matter, Nat. You're like...alive. That's what you're doing. And that's plenty."

[thebancrofts]

rules of engagement

ABOUT THE WRITER

you can call me elle! 25, she/they, returning to tumblr after a long hiatus

i ask that all of my partners be at least 21 years of age

please keep in mind that english is my second language!

ABOUT ACTIVITY

MST timezone

i'm a student, activity will be completely random sry!

please don't pressure me for replies i am small and i will cry

ABOUT THREADS

i use small gifs and text and would prefer my partners do too

sometimes i like to format for aesthetic purposes but i try to keep it from being too distracting

i will not write with characters under 18

i write a lot of smut but am selectively open to other things as well ... but please don't follow this blog then make me feel weird bc you're uncomfy with smut lmao

i try to keep replies under 2-3 paragraphs bc i don't have the attention span to keep up with anything longer

as of right now i am only interacting with female/femme presenting characters sry boys <3

ABOUT FCS

i don't have an official banned list but won't interact with:

FCs under 18

the deceased

anyone who has explicitly stated they don't wish to be used for RP purposes

alternatively, you can find FCs i am desperate to write with here and here!!

ETC.

be nice

don't send ooc hate to me or my partners i'm a big baby but i can fight

respect my pronouns pls

this blog is QTBIPOC friendly and if yours isn't don't bother following

[powergayser]

i dont feel like uploading this to ao3 so here's a fic i wrote. wouldn't say this is my best writing, ive been burned out for months but im trying to write when i feel like it since i have bigger projects i want to put out.

for context, kyo is transgender.

new routines

kyo strode into the bathroom, in just a t-shirt, and lightly bumped iori’s hip with his own. the redhead rolled his eyes and stepped out of the way. 

while kyo brushed his teeth, iori continued his routine. toner onto a cotton pad, which he lightly dabbed across his face. next, serum. iori reached around kyo for the one he liked to use at night. using the dropper, he placed a few drops onto his face, and then gently rubbed it in. 

kyo had finished brushing his teeth and set his toothbrush aside. he then turned the sink on again, splashed water on his face, and scrubbed it as furiously as he could. iori stared at him in mild horror. after a few agonizing moments of this, kyo resurfaced and pressed his face into a towel. 

“at least use moisturizer,” iori pleaded. 

“nope,” was kyo’s response. iori sighed and squeezed some eye cream onto his index finger. before leaving, kyo wrapped his arms around iori and kissed his neck. the redhead jumped at the prickly sensation of kyo’s face against his smooth skin. 

“you have stubble,” he said, eyes wide. iori turned to get a better look. kyo grinned. 

“you noticed.”

“hard not to.” a pause. “you keeping it, or…?”

“mm… maybe. i don’t know how to shave. my dad probably won’t be willing to teach me, so…” he shrugged. 

“i could teach you.” iori offered without thinking. through the mirror, he saw kyo’s eyebrows shoot up.

“you don’t have to,” he said, “but i wouldn’t mind.” 

“i want to. tomorrow morning?”

kyo smiled and kissed his cheek. “sure. thank you.” and with that, he went into iori’s room and hopped into bed. once he finished his routine, iori followed. 

[aelyosos]

ocean, what's your favorite thing about sailing?

Ocean crooks a smile, as though just the mere mention of sailing brings him unbridled warmth in his chest.

“Th’ freedom ye feel, lad. S’nothin’ like bein’ on the sea.” His sharp green eyes almost seem to twinkle as he recalls.

“Th’ breeze in yer hair an’ the strong smell ‘f salt, th’ vastness ye can lose yerself in.” Ocean pauses for a moment. “…Used to ask m’self why I felt so different out there, why I couldn’t settle fer bein’ a landlubber.” He shakes his head, a hand reaching for his smokes.

“Fuck settlin’,” He says, putting a cigarillo to his lips. “Somethin’ calls out t’ ye, ye owe it to yerself t’ chase it.”

oc interview w ocean / 📫

[vriskart]

[mcprincessdiaries-archive]

💧🌈✂️🕷️🙉🚆 bo bo bonana bonanza

💧 random angst headcanon

was 100% willing to die for the cause in shadowbringers. in fact he kind of wanted it to kill him & the fact it didnt is partly why he broke down later

🌈  what advice would they give to their younger self?

he would tell himself its perfectly ok not to follow the path his parents want him to take & he can in fact find happiness living a life that he wants, with people that accept him as he is. and the fun part is he kinda did get to do that, thanks to the oddities of a certain endwalker zone :)

✂️  what is the "last straw" for them to cut someone out of their life? how easily do they let go of people?

honestly its an astronomical feat to fuck up enough that he wants nothing to do with a person. like he can get mad and disagree and fight, but ultimately hes still pretty forgiving, or at least willing to put pettiness aside for a moment when needs be. i think the one and only exception is emet-selch, he's gonna hate the guy to the end of time lmao

🕷️ what is their biggest fear? do they have any irrational / mundane fears?

hes always been scared of letting people down, and that only gets compounded with the wol business and worrying about fucking up and causing the end of the world or whatever. hes also fairly squeamish and cant really handle when things get too gruesome, but obv his line of work has forced him to get better about it. on the mundane side hes scare of magitek. like he can tolerate being around it and using it if its simple enough but anything more involved he'd rather not

🙉 what is the worse thing your oc could hear from someone?

"im disappointed in you"

🚆 what is their answer to the trolley problem?

[kficc]

my silly little flipnote is up early on patreon if that interests any1 o_O https://www.patreon.com/posts/43804469

[waveridden]

reply: i am coming up to you with a scientist's clipboard and asking you many questions about grad school dropout mira lemma you have the floor whenever you should want it

thank you! you have unlocked Lore In Progress. this is all rough but here it is! also for context: core, west virginia is a real town with about 1700 people, and it also happens to be about a dozen miles away from the west virginia university campus in morgantown.

mira lemma is not from core, and she is not from morgantown. she’s from some other tiny town in west virginia. she grew up in the mountains, knows a thing or two about nature. her parents moved here before she was born: they’re immigrants, here because her father got a job, and it doesn’t matter that the closest mosque is an hour away, and it doesn’t matter that she doesn’t get along with the other kids.

see, mira’s life has been laid out for her as long as she can remember. she’s going to go to wvu for pre-law and then one of half a dozen choices for law school. she has known this for years. she should not have anything to worry about. sure, she’s not a great negotiator, hates arguing, tries to do debate team in her local high school and there are only three other kids who care enough to try, but — she’s going to be a lawyer.

except then she gets to wvu and hates all her law classes. she takes an accounting class and it feels like the numbers are singing. she’s here on half a dozen scholarships, she’s hanging by a thread, she drives ninety minutes to visit her parents every weekend, she shouldn’t change her major, but. but.

it’s her senior year, on the way home from one of those visits home, when her car breaks down. it’s used, gotten from a neighbor’s family member’s neighbor, it’s a miracle that it survived as many trips up the mountain as it did but it didn’t survive this one. she calls for a tow and gets taken to the core auto mechanics garage. but everyone just calls it jo’s place.

and it’s fantastic. it’s the first place mira has been where people don’t give a shit about stuffy business stuff, don’t say anything about the parties she doesn’t go to. these are people like the ones she grew up with but better. jo willowtree greets mira himself with a firm handshake and a promise to get mira home soon. jasper, the receptionist, is doing homework under his desk: he’s in online school getting his associate’s because he can’t afford to leave core just yet. lady, the head mechanic, walks mira through all the repairs and doesn’t let her leave till she understands all of them.

it’s a total coincidence that jasper mentions that they don’t have great accounting, could use a little helping out. mira goes straight to jo and says that she’ll come in two afternoons a week to help with bookkeeping, if he pays well. she gets the job on the spot.

the next morning she gets accepted into the masters program for accounting. the next weekend she finally tells her parents and they say they won’t pay for a masters and they certainly won’t pay for a masters in accounting. she’s not cut off, not fully, not yet, but she’s also about to need funding. two afternoons a week becomes the whole summer working at jo’s, getting to know everyone. core’s cheaper living than morgantown, so mira graduates and moves in with jasper, and tully who works at the gas station across the street from the mechanic’s shop, and quinns who’s assistant manager at the grocery store. it’s the best summer of her life.

dropping out of school is what jasper calls a strategic move. she’s miserable, the scholarships and fellowships vanish and she’s buried up to her neck in loan debt, and her classes are all so theoretical and pointless compared to the actual work that she’s doing for jo’s. she makes it a semester before she quits school. she has other things to worry about anyways: she and quinns have been talking more, later at night, and that always means something. and on top of that jo’s has started a pickup blaseball team, just something to do, and since jo is pitching he insists he can’t be team manager. mira’s not an athlete but she’s good with a schedule, so she schedules practices and team meetings and tryouts for the league.

ultra league blaseball want the team to be from morgantown. mira, more than anyone, is the one who insists that they’re named after core. morgantown wasn’t good to her, but core was. even though core isn’t necessarily good on its own, too small and connected and strange and mean, core is what made them the mechanics. they’re a good team, good enough that the league takes them as a whole without extra tryouts. mira’s still not on the roster: manager and accountant, but not player. she’s happy supporting at a distance.

the core mechanics debut in the first season. tully’s incinerated four years later, and that’s the only reason mira picks up a bat for the first time. (but that’s a story for another time.)