#special agent dale cooper x reader

[ballard96]

I need him biblically hes soooo

[depressopax]

Dale Cooper NSFW headcanons

Twin Peaks fandom

Pairing: Dale Cooper x gender neutral reader Genre: Smut, headcanons Warning(s): Sexual content! Reader is gender neutral Words: 1.1K Summary: Being in a relationship with Dale Cooper would include... English is not my main language, if I make any spelling mistakes please let me know so I can improve my writing! <3 SFW version WIP Full masterlist

Dale sure has had sex before, but still he’s pretty awkward when it comes to that part of your relationship. 

Especially the first time

He was a nervous mess, and in combination with his arousal, his flushed face and how eager he was, it wasn’t really awkward, instead you found it cute.

SERVICE TOP.

He is more submissive by nature, but still likes being on top, since it gives him a slight feeling of control.

…He does love it when you guide him, telling him what pace to go in, and have you decide positions.

He prefers to have you on your back, so he can hover over you and see your sweet face as he pounds into you

He does prefer being on top of you, but also loves it when he can lay back down and have you take care of him.

Seeing you on top of him is like a wet dream to him. He has a weakness for “being taken care of” by you.

He’s loud in bed. He’s a bit ashamed of it, since he’s usually calm, but when he sleeps with you, he can’t, nor wants to control the sounds he makes. 

You love it, though. Since Dale is very calm it’s hot to see him lose it.

…Especially when he whimpers for you.

Overstimulate or edge him, and you’ll even hear him beg for you to stop or continue, cry and whimper. 

Dale’s sexdrive is not that high, but if you have a high libido, he doesn’t really complain.

He prefers long, slow and passionate love-making sessions.

That’s why he’s not a fan of quickies.

He wants to really take his time with you and have time for foreplay and aftercare

But if you insist - or if he’s really horny - he’s down for a quickie. 

His favorite place besides the bed is probably the shower.

That way, he can have sex with you in the morning, clean up and then get ready for work. 

You’re often left with hickeys after sex. Dale is not the possessive/jealous boyfriend (at least not showing signs to be), but he enjoys leaving love marks on your beautiful skin, as to show everyone that tries flirting with you that you’re in a relationship.

He is not that kinky and prefers “vanilla sex”. 

…He’s not the one to admit it, but the thought of light bondage is hot. He would love for you to tie him in bed using one of his ties. 

Maybe even blindfold him, too…

But a big NO is anything that could hurt you. It’s a turn-off

If he’s in the mood, he also spices it up with roleplays.

He’s not good at dirty talking in bed, but if you were to sext each other or talk on the phone… Damn.

Especially if you’ve been apart for too long.

He just misses you, …and your body.

He gets off to the thought of you touching yourself to his words, and hearing your sweet moans over the phone

He does have a praising kink. He likes being praised by you, especially.

Though he doesn’t show it, he’s pretty insecure - especially in bed.

So just praise him and let him know how attractive you find him 

He does the same for you, too.

He’s not shy to tell you how good it feels to be inside of you, how good you look, and how “DAMN good” you taste.

He prefers giving oral.

Once again, he’s a service top.

He loves to have you lying down on bed, moaning his name whilst you tell him what to do.

When you receive oral from him, he usually takes the opportunity to tease you, even edge or overstimulate you, as revenge for how you treat him in bed.

He can AND will spend hours between your legs.

And boyyy he knows how to use his tongue.

Of course, he loves receiving too.

He tells you “He thinks better” when you suck his dick. 

Of course, this only sounds like a lame excuse to get oral from you - but you’re more than happy to oblige.

He is the guy to just lean back with a smile whilst enjoying your lips working on his length.

Especially after a long day at work, or when he’s exhausted. 

He’s not the person to ask you right out for heads, but instead will hint until you understand what he wants, and drops to your knees for him.

He’s not very demanding when it comes to receiving, he just appreciates the fact that you want to please him.

Dale lets you do your thing while he relaxes and looks down at you with a proud smile

…But, if you do gag a bit - he’ll legit go feral.

Dale is very slow and passionate when you have sex

Also, he definitely refers to it as “making love” lol

Because that’s what it’ll feel like.

His goal during sex is to make you feel good. 

He does care about his own pleasure, of course, but he gets off to watching you receive pleasure.

He is extra proud of his hands, knowing how good he can make you feel with them. 

He doesn’t like making a mess, so when he cums, he prefers to do so in a condom.

…Or inside you, if you insist. 

But he doesn’t mind if you make a mess. 

Sure it’s annoying to “clean up”, but at the same time he likes knowing he’s the one to make you cum like that, and THAT MUCH.

Aftercare with Dale >>>>>>>

He’s always a loving boyfriend, but especially after sex.

He’ll make sure to clean you up and get you comfortable

Will ask you if you’re alright and tell you how well you did for him.

He will run you a hot bath if you need it, while he either cleans the mess the two of you made, or even joins you, if you insist.

He massages your back and plants soft kisses all over you.

But he also wants the same treatment if you’ve been rough or dominant with him.

Man is needy af after sex, in the sweetest way possible.

Just praise him by telling him he did well and that you love him etc (or why not call him good boy?) and he’ll melt and feel so appreciated.

Dale prefers to make love to you at night, since he likes to fall asleep afterwards with you in his arms.

Currently having a Dale Cooper brainrot I NEED this man in my life ong Also dying for some Dale content. PLEASE FEED ME 🙏 GOING FERAL FOR THE GIF

[pinkdaiisies]

Dale Cooper x reader

Summary: A certain fbi agent knows just how to break you out of your shell... for some odd un-explainable reason.

Based off of this request

Notes: sorrrrryyyyy for the wait!!

Word Count: 1.5k

Lucy was currently thoroughly explaining to Sheriff Truman which line to pick up through the phone. Her desk faced the guest window, while yours faced the opposite wall behind her. You didn't mind not having to greet whoever walked in. It's the main reason why you loved your job. Being able to complete paperwork in solitude, while having the occasional gossip session with Lucy was the dream. Everyone who worked at the station knew you weren't the talkative type, hell, everyone in Twin Peaks knew that.

After Lucy hung up the phone, she swiveled her chair towards you. Every deputy awaited the arrival of some FBI agent that was due to show up any hour. The past day and a half, Twin Peaks had an eerie feel to it. The loss of Laura Palmer shaking everyone up, including you.

"Gee I wonder when the FBI agent is showing up!" Lucy said. "I've gotten five calls the last 2 hours asking for updates on the case." Lucy said while spinning in her chair. "Hows your paperwork going?"

"It's going." You said. A drunken man had hit a deer on one of the highways and he claimed that it was the station's fault for not having deer crossing signs. You were finishing up some of his court statement logs. "You'd think a man living in Twin Peaks his whole life would know that deer live in the woods." Lucy giggled at your words before getting distracted by Deputy Brennan at the coffee machine. She stood up from her seat and joined him, making you the only one behind the desk.

You were still turned away from the window when you heard the lobby door open. You prayed it was just another deputy coming back from being on duty. Unfortunately you heard someone trying to get your attention.

"Excuse me, miss?" You had no choice but to spin your chair around to the mystery person.

You could tell right away from the look of the man that this was the FBI agent. The fancy suit and the FBI pin near his collar gave it away. Another thing you took notice of right away was the man's sheer beauty. You weren't the type to make your feelings of attraction a topic of discussion, but you would definitely have to gossip with Lucy about this later.

"Hi sorry." You spoke back quietly.

"Lucy is it?" The man questioned while looking at Lucy's name placard on the desk.

"No, Lucy stepped out for a moment. I'm y/n l/n." You said while pointing to your name tag back on your own desk, which was barley visible due to the overflow of paper work.

"It's lovely to meet you y/n." Dale said with a smirk on his face. "Its sad we have to meet under these unfortunate circumstance. I'm Special Agent Dale Cooper." The smirk on his face nearly made you forget the case at hand. His flirtatious smile yet professional demeanor wasn't something you were used to, having lived in Twin Peaks your whole life. Although you've only known him for literal seconds, you were sure he was different from anyone you've ever met.

"Well, it's lovely to meet you too Agent Cooper." You said with a smile that was probably a little too big for the moment. "Our Sheriff is down the hall in the door on your right. We also have donuts and coffee in the break room so feel free to grab as much as you'd like! If we run out just call me and I can probably go out to the Double R diner to grab some more, it's really no problem. Twin Peaks is really happy to have you-"

"Y/n! Mr. FBI agent probably has to go, you don't want to hold him for too long." Lucy saved you from your rambling. You've never once rambled before in your life. You probably spoke more in those few sentences then you have all week!

"It's really no problem. Thank you y/n." Then Dale left your vision as he turned the corner to make his way to the Sheriff.

"I love you y/n but I don't think I've ever heard you speak so much at once!" Lucy exclaimed. It was true, you didn't know what had gotten into you. Sure, Dale Cooper was a good looking man, but you have never once let a man change your very own speaking tendencies!

"Ugh!" You groaned in response, knowing you had just embarrassed yourself. You swiveled your chair back to your desk and buried your face into your hands.

-

Dale Cooper had been in Twin Peaks for four days now. The only updates you got on the Laura Palmer case were the details that Deputy Brennan accidentally let slip to Lucy, and it didn't seem like they were getting far.

You were able to keep your blabbering to a minimum around Dale Copper for the most part. Although when Dale walked in every morning he would make a point to catch your attention to tell you good morning. So obviously you had no choice but to awkwardly spin your chair around as fast as lighting, occasionally knocking down some papers in the process, and say good morning along with some meaningless comment about the weather or the status of the coffee in the break room.

Despite your awkwardness, Dale Cooper always agreed with you, or thanked you, and walked to the Sheriff's room with a smile on his face. Always leaving Lucy giggling to herself. You spilled to her that you thought the agent was handsome on the second day of his arrival. Sometimes she would call him over to the reception desk just to ask him some meaningless question that involved you somehow. You were left speechless every time, but Dale always answered back in a serious and thoughtful way.

Starting the paper work for poor Laura's case was the most difficult paperwork you've ever filled out. Her murder hit a lot harder than all of the other cases that were brought to your desk. Which is why you needed to get your second cup of coffee of the day. You made your way to the break room and poured yourself a cup, while looking at the donut options.

Footsteps approached as you stirred your coffee and you soon realized that agent Cooper was walking towards you. Your heartbeat sped up tremendously.

"Hello y/n!" Dale said.

"Hi Agent Cooper! How are you?" Although you started speaking before he could answer, "I expect not too well because I heard you and the deputies stayed out late last night looking for evidence. I can only imagine how stressful that may be." You silently cursed yourself for rambling on once again, but Dale didn't seem to mind.

"I'm doing as well as I can. Although a cup of coffee will definitely make my day better!" Dale answered back. To help the agent, you reached for a cup but failed to realize Cooper was reaching at the same time. Both of your guys hands brushed and you pulled away anxiously, a blush staining your cheeks. You muttered a sorry, and Dale said that it was no problem.

"Well, how are you doing?" Dale asked back while beginning to pour himself a cup of coffee.

"Oh me? I'm doing okay I guess, can't really complain, I'm not the one trying to solve a murder right now." You giggled awkwardly. Now is definitely not the time to be laughing?! You thought to yourself. "I'm sorry that was dumb. I totally respect your line of work, I'm just not used to talking to a lot of new people..." Your sentence got quieter as you spoke. "I've lived here my whole life so everyone knows everyone."

"Don't apologize," Dale started. "So I'm assuming you've eaten at the Double R Diner before then?" Dale asked before taking a sip of his coffee.

"Of course I have! Their food is really good and the owner is just the sweetest person you'll ever meet!" You said, finally a normal sentence coming out of you.

"Well maybe you'd like to accompany me to get coffee over there tomorrow around this time?" Out of all of the things you expected Agent Cooper to say, him asking you on a date was very low on the list.

"Yes- I mean, I'd love to! I didn't think that you would- well, I never expected you to..." You cut yourself short, realizing another century long ramble was near. "Yes Agent Cooper." You finished with a huge smile on your face.

"Great! I should probably get going, Harry was expecting me in his office." He smiled and left you standing there with excitement.

Dale walked into the room that the Sheriff was in.

"Your receptionist sure is quite talkative Harry." Dale said.

"Yes, Lucy does tend to be that way." Sheriff Truman said while organizing some evidence on the table.

"No, I meant y/n." Dale said with a skeptical look on his face.

"Are you sure you don't have them mixed up?" Harry questioned.

"Well I just asked y/n on a date tomorrow so I sure hope I don't!"

[fyrewalkwithmee]

Thin Walls Pt. 1

Special Agent Dale Cooper x reader

Sooo there's a serious lack of Dale Cooper x reader and I'm in my Twin Peaks era and plan to change that. This will be a multi-part story because I can't physically write anything under like 1k words lol.

word count: 1.8k

WARNINGS: 18+ due to sexual themes, descriptions of masturbation, sexual frustration/tension, pining, smuttyness ;)

Please let me know if you enjoyed the story and want pt.2 I'm also happy to take requests for Agent Cooper if you have any naughty ideas.

Thank you for reading <3

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Chapter 1, The Agent Next Door

Your mind flashed to what happened earlier that day as you fixed your just-curled hair into an elegant but wild bun. You had been interrogating two high school girls who were Classmates of Laura Palmer. You and your partner had discovered evidence possibly linking them to the Palmer case.

You and Dale had decided it would be best for you to question them first as they may be more likely to talk if it were a younger female agent grilling them. You had a way with young girls that almost always made them spill their secrets. Perhaps you saw a bit of yourself in them. Maybe it was your gentle nature and 'kind eyes' as Dale liked to call them. He was always saying things like that, complimenting you, uplifting you as an agent. It never went any further than that, Dale was a professional after all, and what could he possibly see in a rookie agent like you? You never told him but somehow you could sense he knew that you always felt a bit insecure being his partner. You were always afraid of letting him down or being the reason a case went south. You knew it was doomed and a pathetic cliche, but you had grown quite fond of him and were desperate for his approval. And that's not all you were desperate for…

You always thought he was handsome and charming and had just accepted it for what it was. But after seeing him work, the way his mind would reel trying to solve a case, the way he was so kind and careful with a victim's family and those in pain. You couldn't help but feel yourself grow more and more attracted to him.

Sometimes when working late at night his large hand would accidentally brush up against yours when going to grab another file amongst the mess of papers on the desk. Electricity would shoot up your hand and travel down your body to places where it probably shouldn't. He would mumble a "sorry" as you brushed it off, trying to look lost in whatever you were reading and not thinking about those hands. So much bigger than your own, so experienced. You imagined what they could be capable of in the right situation, the way they would rub that spot in between your thighs, stretch you out and become wet with your arousal. How he would make a mess of you as you reached closer and closer to that delicious breaking point.

At this point, you would shift in your seat, trying to alleviate the intense need for him beginning to pool in your panties. Sometimes, you thought you could feel his eyes fall on you and linger a little longer than usual when you did. You were almost certain he could read your thoughts, often sharing a new theory with you that you were just about to bring up yourself. You secretly wished he could, that would be a lot easier than actually telling him how you felt. Telling him wasn't an option, you couldn't risk compromising your partnership if he didn't feel the same way. So you kept it all inside, frustration building with each new case and each hour spent with your special agent.

You often found yourself having to relieve that tension in the wee hours of the morning when you couldn't sleep. Your own fingers taking his place, slipping in and out of yourself, imagining you and Dale in an array of naughty and scandalous scenarios until your desperation reached it's climax.

Dale's POV. It had been 2.25 hours since the special agent had recorded his final comments to send to his trusty assistant. He had had a smug, prideful grin on his face, "Diane remind me to tell agent y/l/n how impressed I was with her work today and how she has continuously proven herself to be a highly skilled and valued member of the bureau and well, just a lovely partner. I will report back to you tomorrow with details of the interrogation of Laura's two classmates. This is Special Agent Dale Cooper saying, goodnight." he placed down the recorder and turned off the light, more than ready to rest after a long day of investigatory work.

It was approximately 2 and a half hours later that he was woken by a thump coming from the wall right where his bed ended and his head lay on the plush hotel pillow. He kept very still, eyes wide, trying to see through the darkness of the room. Another smaller thump followed by a bigger sound made him lean over and grab his recorder, "Diane, I ask you again to please express post those earplugs to my room at the Great Northern. It appears that whatever animals that have been having relations in the walls for the past week have returned tonight for another session. Note that February must be mating season in Twin Peaks. Another note, the Great Northern has excellent coffee but very thin walls." He placed the recorder down and sighed deeply, closing his eyes when he heard another thump followed by another sound entirely. It sounded like a high pitched squeal coming from one of the animals, "at least the animals are getting some action" he said to himself with a sigh.

It was an unfortunate part of the job. Maintaining any romantic relationship was hard due to the travelling nature of his work and becoming involved with anyone he met along the way was against his guidelines as it could compromise the case. To put it shortly, he hadn't infact been intimate with a women in a long long time. He pushed himself closer to the wall and placed his ear against its coolness, maybe if he could figure out what animal it was the staff could find a way to expel the creatures.

Upon getting closer the muffled sounds became a lot clearer. He could now tell that it wasn't an animal at all. It was a human voice, a woman's voice, it was familiar to him. It was his partner's voice… He quickly shrugged back down into the covers, a million thoughts passing through his mind and one particular feeling shooting straight down into his crotch. "Agent y/l/n, no it couldn't be." He thought eyes wide with shock and confusion.

He had thought she'd taken this work seriously. she knows the risk of getting involved with people while on a case, especially in a town as small and tight-knit as Twin Peaks. Who could it be? He wondered an unexpected feeling of possessiveness rising up from his chest. He heard another more pronounced moan come from behind his head, more desperate in nature. He felt cock twitch in his pants and shifted around a bit, trying to keep his mind and body distracted by who the mystery man was. Harry is seeing Ms Packard so it wasn't him. It could be Hawk but he hadn't picked up on any tension between the two. It definitely wasn't Andy, he wasn't her type. She had spent 90% of her time in the town with him, so who was it and why was this getting on his nerves so much?

Yes his partner was exceedingly beautiful and intelligent and he would often have death stare the slimey men that would ogle at her when she would get dressed up to go undercover. The way he would sit in anticipation every morning waiting for her to join him for breakfast and how his heart would race every time their bodies would press up against each other trying to avoid gunfire didn't go noticed to him. He had pegged all that down to adrenaline and not having been this close to a woman for a long time. Except this feeling he had now… Knowing that there could be another man in her life, touching her, kissing her, making her scream. it was all too much. All at once the feelings he had pushed down for so long rose up to the surface and he had half the mind to go into that room, grab whoever was in there by the collar and beat them bloody for touching his girl… Well, his partner, he mentally corrected himself.

He hadn't realised it but while lost in his thoughts his hand had travelled down to the bulge that had formed in his pants and he was palming himself, rubbing his aching cock to the sounds of his partner in the next room. The agent felt ashamed but her whimpers were too much for him and he knew he wouldn't sleep at all that night unless he felt his release. He pulled himself out of his shorts, he was uncomfortably hard and his length slapped right up against his abdomen. He let out a relieved sigh as he circled the beads of precum that had leaked from his tip using them to help slick his member as he started slowly stroking. His hips bucked at the sensation, face painted with ecstasy. He felt the urge to make sounds to further release his pleasure but knew he had to stay quiet. If he could hear her, she would definitely be able to hear him.

He wondered what she would think. Would she be disgusted or would it turn her on further knowing her sensible and trustworthy partner was touching himself madly at the sounds and thought of her current predicament? this idea pulled him closer to the edge as he added more pressure to his movements, sliding his hand at an impossibly fast pace up and down his cock, hips bucking and sweat building around his temples. He tried his best not to think about the third person in this situation, not wanting anything to distract him from his impending orgasm.

It was as if his partner had read his mind because it seemed that she too was close to climaxing, her cries becoming more and more laboured. He was so so close to release, about to tip over the edge when he heard a sound that he never thought he would hear in his wildest dreams or fantasies. The familiar voice called out in pleasure a singular name into the nightly abyss, "Oh Dale, ohh fuckk". The proclamation was followed by a lengthy moan and then the silence of the night returned.

The detective halted all movement his seed pumping out of him, spilling onto his stomach. He lay there with his eyes and mouth open shocked at what he just heard and disappointed at his ruined climax. "I must be going insane", he thought to himself, "there's no way she just said my name as she-" he just couldn't believe it. As one agent on one side of the wall fell into a deep frustration free sleep, the other lay in his bed wide awake. Unable to shake the millions of thoughts now cluttering his already busy mind. He wouldn't get any sleep that night but he knew one thing for sure…

He needed her desperately and after tonight there was no going back.

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[4pologygir1]

if you write dale cooper x intern!reader crushing on eachother around the fbi office i will do three backflips

i love writing for dale so much, i have a ton of little drafts about him! this idea was so adorable, i started writing the moment i saw it– hopefully this suffices <3<3 1k words btw!

the fluorescent hum of the office had a certain rhythm, a mechanical heartbeat that underscored the quiet shuffle of paperwork and the occasional ring of telephones. you had been here for three months now, weaving in and out of file rooms and coffee stations, absorbing every lesson this internship had to offer. you were diligent, eager, precise—but most of all, you had an absolutely ruinous crush on special agent dale cooper.

at first, it had been a subtle thing, tucked neatly between admiration and curiosity. he was brilliant, of course, with his careful enunciations and sharp, inquisitive mind. but it was the warmth that got to you. the way he spoke to secretaries with the same attentiveness as he did high-ranking officials. the way he never failed to greet you in the morning, his voice a pleasant note against the gray office air.

and then there were the moments—small, impossible-to-ignore moments—when it felt like he lingered.

like today.

"good morning!" cooper’s voice rang out as he passed your desk. you looked up from the case file you were meant to be organizing.

"morning, agent cooper." you tried to keep your voice neutral, professional.

his lips quirked up. "call me dale."

you almost dropped the file. "oh! um, sure. dale."

it felt too intimate, like holding something warm and breakable between your hands.

"how’s your morning so far?" he asked, pausing. you noted, with no small amount of distress, that he hadn’t asked anyone else that question.

"good! quiet," you answered, feeling oddly self-conscious. "yours?"

"fantastic. i had an exceptional cup of coffee and a dream that i’m fairly certain is unrelated to any current case."

you bit the inside of your cheek to keep from grinning too hard. "glad to hear it!"

he seemed satisfied with this exchange and gave you a nod before heading toward the chief’s office. you exhaled, your heart pounding.

this was ridiculous.

you were an intern. he was dale cooper.

it wasn’t that he was untouchable—he was kind, approachable, always willing to explain things to you. but that was the problem. he was good to everyone. you had no reason to believe he felt anything beyond a professional fondness.

and yet–

there were the glances. the lingering pauses. the way he always seemed to find you in a crowded briefing room.

maybe it was just your overactive imagination. or maybe—

"hey, you."

you startled as agent albert rosenfield materialized beside your desk, looking unimpressed as ever.

"you look like you just saw god," he observed. "or an open flame. hard to tell."

you huffed, trying to regain some dignity. "good morning to you too, agent rosenfield."

he narrowed his eyes at you, then glanced in the direction cooper had gone. his expression flattened.

"oh, for—seriously?"

your silence must have confirmed his suspicion, because he groaned. "great. look, kid, save yourself the trouble. that man is a walking enigma wrapped in optimism. you’ll drive yourself crazy."

"i have no idea what you’re talking about," you said, far too quickly.

albert sighed, pinching the bridge of his nose. "of course you don’t. listen, just—try to keep it together. we don’t need anyone in this office getting starry-eyed over his coffee sermons."

with that, he walked off, leaving you somewhat mortified and not at all reassured.

---

for the next few days, you tried your best to be normal. you took notes in meetings without sneaking glances. you focused on reports without imagining how his hands might look resting on your desk. you even managed to answer him casually when he stopped by to ask about case files.

but then, one afternoon, cooper did something that completely obliterated your resolve.

you were in the break room, pouring coffee, when he walked in. he gave you a warm smile, heading to the pot after you.

"ah, nothing like a fresh cup in the afternoon," he mused.

"oh, yes," you agreed, feeling incredibly self-aware. you stepped aside to let him reach the sugar.

and then—

he touched your wrist.

it was barely anything, just a light press of fingers as he steadied himself, but your breath hitched.

"apologies," he murmured, withdrawing as if he, too, had felt something. his eyes met yours, dark and searching.

you swallowed. "no problem."

a beat of silence stretched between you. he tilted his head slightly, studying you in that way of his—like he was about to say something profound, something that would change everything.

but then another agent walked in, breaking the spell. cooper took a step back, cleared his throat.

"well," he said, ever composed, "enjoy your coffee."

And then he was gone.

---

after that, things became almost unbearable. every interaction felt charged, a quiet game of unspoken words. when he passed you documents, his fingers would brush against yours just slightly longer than necessary. when he asked for your opinion on cases, he listened too closely, as if you were saying something important.

albert, ever the observant cynic, seemed seconds away from smacking both of you upside the head.

it all came to a head one evening when you were staying late to finish a report. most of the office had cleared out, leaving a hush over the desks. you were typing when you heard the familiar sound of approaching footsteps.

"burning the midnight oil?"

you looked up. cooper stood there, hands in his pockets, watching you with something unreadable in his expression.

"Trying to," you admitted, stretching. "you as well?"

he nodded, stepping closer. "i find the office is different at night. even quieter. feels almost… liminal."

you smiled. "like a dream?"

his gaze flickered, something sparking behind his eyes. "exactly."

for a moment, neither of you spoke. the air between you felt fragile, like one wrong move would shatter it.

"i admire your work," he said suddenly, voice softer than usual. "you're sharp. thoughtful."

your heart stumbled over itself. "thank you, agent cooper."

he hesitated, then smiled faintly. "dale."

you exhaled, just barely resisting the urge to grin.

"dale," you corrected, voice almost reverent.

and for the first time, you let yourself believe that maybe—just maybe—this wasn’t all in your head.

maybe, just like in his dreams, cooper was waiting for a sign.

maybe that sign was you.

[wr4th0ftheb0dy]

Dear Reader,

Just started Twin Peaks for the first time! What follows are my notes from the field:

Obsessed with Donna’s costume design at the start of S2. The bigger her hair gets, the more frightened I become of her. It’s almost like she’s consuming Laura Palmer’s essence and morphing into her (al la heathers/jawbreaker) and it has me morbidly fascinated.

I need Special Agent Dale Cooper like water. He’s so strange and at times off-putting but also so well dressed.

Can’t figure out what the fucking deal is with Laura cousin. Who are you? What are your intentions? Why don’t I trust you? Also who is that hot shut-in horticulturist? Why don’t I trust him and why is he so sexy to me?

I don’t know if this is unpopular or not but my top ships so far (in no particular order) are as follows.

1. Lucy x Andy

2. Dale Cooper x Harry Truman

3. Dale Cooper x Audrey Horne

Heard I’m in for a treat for the s2 finale. Will update when I know more.

[droogiesanddiscourse]

could i request 1 with dale cooper please? love your twin peaks stuff 💖

┊ ༑ ࿐ྂ。#1 Inside a small, bustling café

"The Company is Better than the Coffee"

"Now, what you're about to experience is pure heaven on your tastebuds, [Y/N]," Dale speaks over the loud hustle and bustle of the early morning breakfast crowd. "I am telling you, you will never have a better cup of coffee. No cream, no sugar needed. Just pure, 100% locally sourced coffee beans grounded to perfection right here in Twin Peaks."

Sitting within one of the comfortably worn booths of the Double R Diner, Dale's brown eyes glisten as he passes a simple, brown porcelain cup across the table.

"There's truly nothing like it, a taste sensation," Dale muses dreamily, eagerly waiting for you to experience that first sip. Though you could not help but find it a bit funny, seeing how excited Dale was getting over something so mundane.

“I must admit, Cooper, this must be one good cup of coffee if you're hyping it up this much." You look down into the cup, seeing your reflection gaze back at you within the murky liquid. Your hand instinctively reaches towards the sugar dispenser, but Dale's quick reflexes grab it just in time.

"No need." He smiles, making a grand sweeping gesture with his other hand. "Just allow the natural flavors to take center stage, you won't even need cream or sugar. Promise."

You yield, albeit a bit startled by his persistence. Dale takes this as a sign to remove his hand from yours, interlocking them on the table. Just waiting. His eyes follow your every movement, watching as your fingers grasp around the handle of the mug. "Cheers," you cheekily offer your cup to Dale. "What are we toasting to today, Cooper?"

He pauses for a moment, thinking to himself for a few seconds before finally declaring. "To new friends." Raising his cup swiftly, he clinks his mug with yours.

"To new friends," you declare back exuberantly. The slightest hint of red brushes against his cheeks, and for a moment he averts his eyes from yours. He has never looked so flustered since his arrival.

You playfully pat the table in front of you a few times in excitement, garnering his attention once again. "Alright, enough waiting. Here we go, Coop." Finally, breaking Dale's intense anticipation, you bring the mug up to your lips.

You take a gulp of the hot liquid, letting it coat your tongue. It's rich, bold, and there's slight notes of something you could only describe as chocolatey. Eyes widening, you finally let the coffee slide it's way down your throat, immediately warming your body up. Without a single hesitation, you quickly gulp another mouthful to experience the taste all over again.

"So," Dale inquires, a hint of playfulness to his tone after you've finally sent your mug down. If your reaction was anything to go off of, he already had his answer.

"You sure were right, Coop. I think that might be the best cup of coffee I've ever had!" Watching Dale's eyes light up brought a smile to your face now, his vibrant energy practically contagious. He smiles, one that's wider and brighter than his usual one. What you would do to make him smile like that every single day.

"No sugar, no cream. It's...perfect! I cannot believe I've lived here my entire life, and never try the coffee! You sure do know your coffee."

He pats your hand, one that is more friendly and affirmative than romantic, but the butterflies in your stomach could not tell the difference. Weirder things have happened in Twin Peaks, falling for an enigmatic outsider would be the least of them.

"Now. If you thought the coffee was good, wait till you taste the cherry pie! [Y/N], you have got to believe me when I say, that the pie here at the Double R Diner is the most delicious dessert I have ever had the honor of eating. Norma is truly a wonderful cook."

He smiles, waiving his hand over at Shelly, to which she just nods. An unspoken request between the two of them, you already knew this pie Dale was going on and on about was on the way.

Maybe, the company is even better than the coffee.

[darling-i-read-it]

Drink

Dale Cooper x reader

Word Count: 1.7k

Warnings: tension, its all tension, intense making out, drinking, gambaling, leading to smut and insituation to smut 

Author’s Note: Not this being way longer than I intended it to be. Blame it on the fact that I was watching Euphoria and it filled me with inspiration because that show slaps. I got a little carried away so it’s probably a little ooc toward the end but I hope you like it lmao 

Requested: by anon, You posted that gifset of dale cooper with the suit and glasses yesterday and I haven’t been able to stop thinking about it since so maybe you should write a fic inspired by it 👀? Like reader goes undercover with him and he’s taken aback by how beautiful she looks and there’s sexual tension between them the entire night until afterwards where he pulls her aside for a steamy make out session. Might be ooc but I’m thirsty so 🤷‍♀️

Summary: the request 

Genre: tension? Almost smut but not quite? 

I don’t own these characters. They belong to author/director 

(not my gif) (the gif that inspired it all by @/myellenficent)

“You’re prepared for tonight?” Dale asked. You crossed your arms to protect from the chill in the air. You nodded stiffly.

“I am.”

“Remember, something fancy that isn’t too flashy. I’m sure you’ll be fine though,” he promised. You nodded again.

“I’ll throw something together. You don’t be too flashy though huh?” you teased. The two of you stopped in the hallway you were walking down. You were standing in front of each other's hotel rooms, which were separate.

“I’ll try my best,” he digressed. You nodded and leaned against your doorway before turning around and opening it, slipping inside.

You and Dale were new partners. You had been friends for ages but only in passing. It wasn’t until your partner died that you were able to actually work together. You had done a few cases together but this was the first one you had to go undercover for. It was odd, seeing Dale in this kind of setting. He was very good at what he did and you were very good at what you did. You should have been paired together years ago.

You looked through your suitcase for something to wear. You were going to go and try and seek out one of the murderers of Laura Palmer. Dale had a theory that he would be there tonight and you weren’t about to question him when he really got going. 

The plan was to gamble, act natural, fend off any woman and get the information you needed. You weren’t that worried. 

You picked out a dress that you had been saving for a special occasion. Just your style and the fit of it always made you feel good. You were kind of excited to wear something that wasn’t casual. You were also excited to hang out with Dale. You knew the other local police force would be there but you figured this was the closest you were going to get to a night out with Dale.

There was a knock on your door five minutes before you were supposed to meet everyone in the lobby. You ran your hands over your hair one more time, checked yourself out in the mirror and then opened the door. 

Dale was wearing a fancier suit than usual, his hair slicked back and a pair of fake glasses over his eyes. You smiled, raising your hands to his bowtie to fix it as it was kind of crooked.

“You clean up nice Coop,” you admitted. “Not that you aren’t already clean most of the time,” you joked. 

Dale was awe struck. He had thought he might have feelings for you but only in passing, never in actuality. But you stood in front of him, wearing that fancy dress, your hair done up all nice. He couldn’t help but feel his emotions come forward in full force. 

“Cooper?” you said as he hadn’t answered you. 

“You look absolutely stunning,” he admitted. You smiled and looked down at your outfit like you weren’t even aware you had been wearing it.

“You think?”

“I know.” His voice had a low grumble to it that you didn’t recognize. It made you let out a stiff shortness of breath. You had to look away from his face.

“Well we should probably go, Harry and everyone will be waiting.” He seemed to snap out of it then. He cleared his throat.

“You’re right. You have your gamabling cash?” he questioned. 

“I can’t gamble. I figured I’d just be your arm candy,” you admitted through a laugh. He put his hand on his hip, creating an arm holder for you. You wrapped your arm around his arm and smiled, walking next to him. 

Harry and Ed stood in the lobby. They eyed the two of you, especially Harry who had been hearing the end of both of your emotions. 

“You look real good,” Ed said, eyeing your outfit. Dale almost got defensive but he held it down.

“Thank you very much Ed.”

-

The night started swiftly enough. You managed to strip away from Dale for a moment and walk around the room, eyeing the area as he started to play a card game. You watched him from afar and navigated through the room. Harry hung back and grabbed your arm gently, pulling you aside.

“If you don’t make a move tonight I’m going to lose my goddamn mind,” he said. You laughed gently.

“We’re on a case, Sheriff Truman,” you whispered. He raised an eyebrow.

“Fine. Look over at Cooper right now and tell me what you’re feeling about this case.” You rolled your eyes and looked back over at Dale. There was a girl on his lap, whispering in his ear. You couldn’t see his expression because she was blocking but you had to give it to Harry. It got to you. 

“Just focus Harry,” you muttered.

“Only if you do.” 

You walked back to the other side of the room and the girl was off Dale’s lap. You pushed it out of your head. You didn’t want to think about it. 

Dale however, was only looking at you. He was trying so hard to focus on the task at hand but he felt the tension in the air. It wrapped around him like a present waiting to be opened. His eyes were always flashing back to you and you were always watching him until you weren’t.

Harry’s hand wrapped around your arm as he pulled you aside. Whispers between the two of you. His chest started to rise and fall and he was going to lose this game of cards and then there was a woman on his lap and he had to tell her to leave because he was only focused on you and he should have been focused on the case. 

Eventually though he was able to talk to a man who knew more about Laura's death. He was able to get information he came for. And the second that conversation ended he walked up to Harry.

“I need a drin-“

“Cooper,” you called, standing beside the two of them.

“Hold on a second, I want a-”

“Coop,” you repeated.

“Y/N I-”

“Dale,” you hissed. You had his full attention. His eyes were back on you now and everything he had just been about to say was gone. “Please tell us what happened to Laura.” Harry raised his finger. 

“Will you write it down in the report?” Dale nodded and let out a harsh breath. 

“I’m going to talk to Ed,” you said and gave Harry a look. You walked over there and let Dale spit out whatever it was that he wasn’t able to say in one sentence. Harry seemed to appreciate it and he understood more about what happened to Laura.

“What are you doing over here?” Ed asked.

“Getting Dale a drink before he passes out from whatevers bothering him,” you muttered. You raised your hand and quickly ordered Dale’s regular.

“I think it’s you,” Ed muttered.

“Huh?”

“Listen, speaking as a man, I think it’s you,” he repeated. You furrowed your brows. Before you could ask for more clarification Dale grabbed your arm which surprised you. You were holding his drink in your hand.

“This is for-” you started and he took the drink, handed it to Ed and dragged you away. You had barely gotten out of view before his lips were on yours. He pressed you flush against the wall of one of the off rooms in the lodge he had managed to find. You pulled away to breath and he looked at you. You had never seen his eyes look like that. Filled with want.

You kissed him again with more fire behind your own lips and he took that happily. He picked up your leg and hiked it up on his side. You let him. After a few moments of the most intense make out session you had ever had you had to pull away.

“We have to go and follow up on the information you got from that guy,” you whispered. You fixed his glasses and he fixed your dress. He let out a long sigh and nodded, pulling himself together. He knew you were right.

“Later,” he promised. You walked back into the main room and grabbed Dale’s drink from Ed to hand to him.

“Drink up. I’m going to talk to Harry.” Dale watched you go and then quickly followed, taking a drink of the one you had gotten for him.

[angelhotchner]

The Glory of Sunshine - Chapter Two

☀️☀️☀️☀️☀️ Story Masterlist Main Masterlist ☀️☀️☀️☀️☀️ Wattpad. A03.

You’ve never been one to want to be fixed. You’d rather try and fix other people, protect them and nourish them back to who they’ve always wanted to be. Their caretaker. Two thousand miles away from home in a new city, with a new job, and seven new faces to decode and decipher, your attention seems to be slowly wrapping up with one of them. Are you falling in love, Y/N? Pairing: Aaron Hotchner x Fem!Reader Additional Tags: Very slow burn, Pining Contains: Adult Language, Fluff, Smut, Heartbreak CM Timeline: AU begins after Haley and Hotch’s divorce. Some cases within this story are not canon.

☀️☀️☀️☀️☀️ Chapter Two ☀️☀️☀️☀️☀️

Word Count: 1.5K

Note: Whoops, the chapter went up six days early (:

Your nerves were stronger on your first day than the day before. During the interview, your ‘agent’ persona took over and impressed Agent Hotchner - but this team spent a lot of time together. They were profilers. Soon enough, a time would come when your persona would slip away, revealing your true self and the thought made you anxious, on edge.

With a resigned sigh, you pulled on a pair of dark cargo pants and a button up shirt and stared into the mirror for a moment. You analyzed the woman in front of you, picking apart small details, almost to reaffirm who you were. Your eyes always looked so kind, so intimate and inviting, but the rest of you read determined, almost unstoppable.

They say that the eyes are the windows to the soul, huh?

Glancing at your watch, you grabbed your bag - abandoning the leather briefcase from yesterday in favour of your trusted shoulder bag - and plucked an apple from the fruit bowl as you made your way out of your new apartment. It didn’t quite feel like a home, yet.

You didn’t drive straight to the office, opting to stop at a coffee drive-thru, and ordered eight different drinks. It didn’t hurt to suck up a little on your first day, right? Plus, it gave you a chance to showcase your profiling skills, even if it was just ordering drinks that you thought each member of the team would enjoy.

Within the paper-work that Hotch had given you yesterday was a small file on each member of the team. You’d studied it religiously this morning after your run, memorizing names and the faces that came with it, reading up on their skills and specialisms. You had a pretty good idea of their personalities by the time you’d hopped into the shower and you were thankful that you knew what kind of team you’d be working with. So, really, the drinks were more a test for you - to see if your hunches were right. It was harder to analyse someone on paper.

The first time that Dawes had realised that you could analyze people as well as you could analyze a crime scene, you were sat in a Starbucks. He’d noticed your mental absence as you stared at other people, listening to their coffee orders and figuring out what kind of person they were.

“What’s up with you?” He’d interrupted you. You blinked at him. “Nothing, why?” “You’re staring at everyone,”

“I’m just understanding them, Dawes,”

“How?” He watched you with a perplexed look, which turned into a respectful expression of surprise as you explained to him what you were doing and how you did it. You pointed out customers, explaining what their order said about them; how they asked for their order; how they carried themselves; what they paid attention to. “You know, you can tell a lot about a person from their order,” You’d giggled, and he raised his eyebrows as he sipped on his black coffee. “So what does my drink say about me?” He toyed with you, and you laughed at him.

“You wished that you were Dale Cooper,” You joked, and he rewarded you with a heart cackle that came from deep in his chest. “Twin Peaks,” He chuckled, taking another sip of his coffee and shaking his head. “The only place that may be weirder than Los Angeles,”

When you arrived at the office, two drink trays in your hand, you were met with four surprised faces watching you.

“Agent L/N,” You smiled warmly at them all as you stepped closer, placing the trays onto an empty desk that you assumed was yours. “And...Agent Derek Morgan?” You looked over to the muscled agent, handing him one of the drinks. He accepted the coffee graciously, but with wide eyes. “Agent Emily Prentiss, this is yours,” You handed another drink to a tall woman with dark features, and she gave you a cheeky grin as she accepted.

“Doctor Spencer Reid,” You grabbed another drink and handed it to the youngest agent, the only one sat down, with his legs crossed in a weird, almost contortionist-style way. “And David Rossi,” Rossi walked up to you and took the cup from your hands, sipping on it in thought.

“You’re good,” He nodded, a small smile on his lips as the agents nodded, all smiling as they sipped their drinks.

“I hope this is a daily thing,” Morgan raised his eyebrow at you, the ghost of a smirk on his lips. You giggled.

“Nice try, buddy. This is just kiss-ass day,” You patted his shoulder, and his expression grew warmer.

“Oh man, I love espresso,” You heard Reid mumble behind you and Derek shook his head, the smile never fading from his face. You grabbed the other drink tray, removing your own drink and placing it onto your desk before you set off in search of JJ and Penelope Garcia. You found JJ’s office first and softly knocked on.

She was on the phone when you entered, so you just placed her drink onto her desk and gave her a quick smile.

Garcia was the hardest to find, and she seemed surprised that anyone was knocking on her door when she opened it.

“Oh, you’re the new agent!” She grinned, beckoning you inside. You felt yourself warming to her already as you stepped into her office - a tech cave, rather.

“And you must be Penelope! I’m Y/N Y/LN,” You exclaimed, handing her her drink. Her face became stunned for a brief moment before she wrapped you up into a small hug, almost like she couldn’t help it, before pushing you away and sipping the drink joyfully.

“We’re going to be best friends,” She declared after she took the first few sips of the drink, which apparently was one of the best choices you could have made judging by the face she pulled. You burst out laughing, her colourful personality and positive aura bringing a grin to your face.

“I’ve gotta go and find Hotch,” You said, motioning to the final drink in the tray in your hands. “See you later!”

She waved you away as you left, and you found the bullpen again. You ascended the stairs towards Hotch’s office and knocked on the door.

“Come in,”

You opened the door gently, teetering inside and closing it behind you. Hotch didn’t look up from the papers in front of him, his left hand holding a pen in midair and his right hand resting against his forehead as he thought.

“Morning, Hotch,” You said. Hotch looked straight up at you, noting the drinks tray in your hand.

“L/N,” He said your name as more of a question as you handed him the final drink in the tray. He took it, and stared at you as he took a sip.

“So…?” You prodded. For a second, his stoic expression broke, and a small chuckle leaked out of him.

That was the first time that Aaron Hotchner made your stomach tie itself into a knot - a beautiful, chaotic knot that was trying to attract butterflies. And that was the first time that you tried to ignore the feeling.

“Yeah, you’re right,” He nodded, a glimmer of a smile still left on his face as he took another sip.

“Nice,” You smiled back at him. He outstretched his arm, taking the empty tray from your hand and placing it into a trash can behind his desk. Your hands fiddled inside your shoulder bag, pulling out yesterday’s paperwork, all completed in black ink.

“Thank you,” He took the papers from your hand, settling them down into a blank space on his desk. “I assume you’ve met the team,”

“Well, I wasn’t giving you special treatment with the coffee,”

“Good. You’d have caused an uproar,” He took another sip of the drink, his lips smacking as he began to speak again. “Rossi and I are around if you need us. Ask Prentiss and Morgan for their opinions before you file any of this,” He placed his drink down onto the desk and reached into one the drawers, pulling out a small stack of manilla files. He handed them to you.

“Thanks,” You simpered, leaving the office with the files as Hotch took another sip of the coffee. He let out a small grin when you were out of sight, before returning his attention back to the paperwork in front of him. His heart hurt a little less today, but it would take him a while to figure out that it was you who’d done it.

-----

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[depressopax]

Agent cooper smut pleaseeee. Why is it so hard to find he’s so yummy?!?!

THIS!!! I need more Dale smuts (and fluffs, headcanons, WHATEVER) in my life rn 😭 Thanks for the request! Enjoy lmaooo <3

Favors - Dale Cooper x gn!reader

Fandom - Twin Peaks

Pairing: Dale Cooper x gender neutral reader Genre: Smut Warning(s): Handjob and oral (reader giving), cuss words, dom/sub dynamic, slight orgasm denial, sub!Dale + dom!reader, begging. Reader is gender neutral! Words: 1.4K Summary: You help your boyfriend Special agent Dale Cooper relax after a rough day at work. English is not my main language, if I make any spelling mistakes please let me know so I can improve my writing! <3 AO3 link

“Hmm? Dale, it’s like 12am… What’s up?” You mumble, rubbing sleep out of your eyes as you stand by the open door next to your boyfriend Dale, who’s still dressed in a suit. His brown hair is slicked back, and he looks energetic and like he just finished work. Oh fuck sake…

“Don’t tell me you’ve worked until now!”

“Well…”

He smiles sheepishly and shrugs, stepping into your house before the cold air enters the house. Even though he looks energetic as always, his brown eyes look tired. He even has dark circles under them. You sigh and start feeling worried for him. He looks at you up and down, and with a hint of a smirk, he says: “Nice pajamas, cutie.”

You look down at yourself, realizing that you’re only dressed in the night wear you recently put on.

“I was just about to go to sleep, jerk!” He laughs and pulls you into a hug. “You should try that.” You mumble.

“Yea… But I always end up having crazy dreams.”

“Weirdo.”

“You love it.” You pull away from him and smile. “I’m sorry for just showing up out of the blue.”

You shrug. You did plan for him to come over tonight, but not at midnight. You can’t really be mad, you’ve missed him. So instead you take his warm hand, leading him to the couch. The tv is still on, after you fell asleep watching a show. Dale sinks into the couch with a happy sigh. He looks very exhausted now. You shut off the tv, making the room dark except the dimmed light from the wall lamp. 

“Seriously… Why the hell did you work until now?”

“This case I’m working on… It’s…” He sighs and shakes his head clearly frustrated with work. He hasn’t told you the details for this particular case, just that it’s a tricky one, and very misleading. “...It’s difficult. I feel like I’m getting nowhere…”

You listen to his rant, but slowly get distracted by his suit. It’s no secret he looks good in his black blazer, that hugs his muscles in the right places, as does his black pants. Your fingertips dance over his shirt, up and down, down and up… 

“I uhm…” Dale clears his throat and calls your name. “What are you…”

“Take off your blazer.”

His eyes widen, and you feel smug when your boyfriend's cheeks glow red. He doesn’t even question it, but simply sits up and tosses the blazer away. He turns to you with a coy smile. 

“Happy?”

You reply by kissing him while your hand moves further up, finding the knot to his black tie. He doesn’t even try to control the kiss and simply lets your tongue invade his mouth. His breathing gets heavier as you pull the tie off, letting it join his blazer. You move your hand down his stomach again, unbuttoning the white shirt in the process. He squirms a bit, and you can’t tell if he’s nervous or excited. You work on the last button, pulling away from the kiss and teasingly bites his bottom lip. Dale whispers your name and his body feels warm from anticipation. As your hand moves to his belt, you figure out why he squirmed so much earlier. You let out a low chuckle and lay your palm over the bulge in his black pants, that suddenly seems too tight for him. He moans softly and looks at you, shaking his head.

“You’re killing me.” 

His voice is raspy and low. 

“Tell me what you want, Dale.”

“You know what I want….” He murmurs, needingly lifting his hips so your hand once again touches his boner. But you wont give in, not yet.

“I want you to say it.” 

“Fuck… Please… I’m…” 

“You’re…?” 

“I-I…”

He suddenly seems shy, and you almost feel mean for smiling at his red face and the stutter. Dale is not directly prude, but when it comes to talking dirty or telling you what he wants in bed, he seems to lose the ability to speak.

“Talk to me, pretty boy.”

“I… I want you to touch me...” You smile at him proudly, but not yet satisfied. “Please… I need your touch. I need it…” His voice breaks slightly and he groans. His pleading really works, because now your own arousal grows. 

He’s so desperate and needy, just the way you like him.

You quickly unbuckle his belt and work the zipper. With trembling hands, Dale helps you pull the pants down. He is sitting down, looking so vulnerable wearing only his gray boxers. The wet fabric reveals he’s already leaking for you. You take the opportunity, and raise a brow.

“I haven’t even started touching you yet, and you’re already about to cum?”

Gulping nervously, the special agent looks up at you with puppy eyes.

“No… It’s uhm…”

Before he can finish the sentence, you kneel before him. You spread his legs apart and push him back into the cushions of your couch. You free his cock from the boxers, which joins the pile of clothes. His cock stands proud and is leaking pre-cum. 

Dale lets out - what you suppose is a nervous chuckle. 

Without wasting another second, you move your hand over his length, using spit as lubrication to slide your hand up and down with ease. You start with slow, teasing strokes that cause your boyfriend to gasp. Your focus is not longer on his face, all you can think of are the sweet moans and pleads he lets out. It only encourages you to continue, and soon you stroke him at a quick pace. He moves his hips, jerking himself off against your soft palm. You continue moving your hand, but let your boyfriend control the tempo now. You can’t help but watch his sweet face. He clenches his jaw, and you feel hypnotized staring at that sharp jawline you love. His eyes are closed and his mouth is half open, as he continues fucking himself into your hand, moving his erection in and out repeatedly. After a bit, you remove your hand. Dale sits up again, still panting heavily with pearls of sweat on his forehead.

“Please don’t stop…” 

“Don’t worry, I won't.”

Because how could you stop now, when he’s so desperate and submissive? 

He has earned a reward for being so patient with your teasing. When you lean down to kiss his leaking tip, he totally loses it. He lets out a whimper and grips the cushions on the couch. His whole body is trembling from pleasure as you lick his shaft, leaving kisses on his cock. He is whimpering and moaning your name while you work wonders on him with those lips. When you proceed to take him in your throat, he cries out.

“I’m gonna…”

“Not yet.” You warn with a raspy voice, pulling away from his throbbing member just to say those two words. He nods, and you wipe a couple of tears from his eyes before going down again. The sounds of Dale’s moans, and the sloppy noises from you, echoes through the living room. You both enjoy the moment, but mostly of all you enjoy watching Dale relax and being taken care of, after all that stress from work. You pull away from his cock and signal him that he can release. He calls out your name as he shoots out thick ropes of cum over himself, and your hand. 

He is still panting for air seven minutes later - but does his best to hide it - after you helped him clean up and brought him to bed. His face is still slightly red and a bit embarrassed as he smiles at you. 

“You really know how to take my stress away.”

“Of course, babe…”

“Thank you.”

“You don’t have to thank me, Dale. I like making you feel good.”

He cuddles up next to you, but soon the two of you end up making out again. 

“Hey… What if I return the favor?”

He has a mischievous grin on his lips now and you can already picture how swollen and wet they’re gonna look once he returns the favor. You smirk at him.

“How can I say no to that?”

“You can’t…” Dale mumbles and kisses his way down. He is gentle and passionate with his kisses. “Fuck, I love you.” he murmurs before sliding his slick fingers into your underwear. You moan and look down at him as he gets between your legs, once again looking energetic.

“I love you too, Dale.”

[depressopax]

If your still in your dale cooper era, would love some more smuts or part 2 of the nsfw alphabet 🥹🥹 keep up the amazing work 💜

Thank you sm AHHH <3 And thanks for the request!! I'm indeed still in my Dale Cooper era hehe GOD I've missed writing about him 😭 Here comes a part 2 of the NSFW alphabet! I had a bit too much inspiration when writing this LMAOO Enjoy and have a good day! <3 ALSO: I just had an idea for a smut one-shot when writing this omg, thank you anon!! Lol

Dale Cooper NSFW Alphabet

Part 2 - G - K

Fandom - Twin Peaks

Pairing: Dale Cooper x gender neutral reader Genre: Smut, headcanons Warning(s): Sexual content below! Mentions of choking kink and bondage, submissive Dale. Reader is gender neutral (not mentioned in this part but goes by they/them) Words: 600 Summary: NSFW alphabet for Dale Cooper. From G-K (Goofy, Hair, Intimacy, Jack off, Kink) English is not my main language, if I make any spelling mistakes please let me know so I can improve my writing! <3 AO3 link soon!

G = Goofy (are they more serious in the moment? are they humorous? etc.)

He’s not humorous but not serious either. He wants sex to be fun and relaxing for the both of you 

He’ll crack a joke or two, and will laugh with you if you do the same

Honestly? Homeboy tends to be awkward af during sexy time lol

Especially when he attempts to talk dirty to you

You feel mean for doings so, but often can’t help but laugh at the blunt “sexy” comments.

He’s not offended tho, he just likes hearing your laughter.

H = Hair (how well groomed are they? does the carpet match the drapes? etc.)

He doesn’t really shave, but still makes sure to keep it neat

He does it both for you but also because he feels more comfortable with his body like that.

He prefers to keep all of his body hair (chest, armpits, legs etc) trimmed neatly.

I = Intimacy (how are they during the moment? the romantic aspect)

VERY romantic and sweet before, during and after.

Sometimes he likes it rough, but honestly nothing beats slow, passionate sex in his opinion.

He want to really take his time with you

…Or have you take your time with him

Said it before and will say it again - He’s a switch ;)

Man could spend hours inside of you, feeling your insides clench around him is the most intimate, amazing feeling ever

He prefers to have sex with you at home, and at nights when he comes home from work.

He hates the thought of doing it in public, having someone else hearing your sweet moans. No… He wants privacy with you.

The thought of going for a quickie and not cuddling afterwards doesn’t sit right with him. 

He likes slow, deep strokes and feeling connected to you

E Y E  C O N T A C T .

…What I’m trying to say is, he’s VERY passionate, romantic and gentle during sex Jfc I’m down bad for this man, could write this for hours 😭

J = Jack off (masturbation headcanon)

He does masturbate, but does it as a stress relief or when he’s feeling horny and need to “take care of the problem”

He is not prude, but still gets embarrassed talking about masturbation.

After he started dating you, he does it less often

Unless he doesn’t want to bother you with his arousal, because you turn him on. A LOT.

Once, you even walked in on him having a wank.

Honestly? He wasn’t really embarrassed. 

That’s when he found out he had a thing for guided masturbation.

Especially when he’s gone on missions, he’ll call you and have your sweet voice guiding him when he masturbates 

I JUST GOT AN IDEA FOR A ONE-SHOT OMG 👀 

K = Kink (one or more of their kinks)

As I said on J… Guided masturbation. 

He can’t explain it, but something about stroking himself while you watch turns him on. 

Also… Mutual masturbation. Having you guide his movements whilst he watches you touch yourself. (...I gotta stop)

Apart from that, he gets off to the idea of you dominating him. 

Yes, he’s a switch, but now I mean you TOTALLY taking charge.

We’re talking light bondage, blindfolds, overstimulation, toys and even light choking

The idea of being completely at your mercy gets him going. He’s used to taking the lead at work and being a leader, so when he’s alone with you after a stressful day, he just wants to lay down and have you turn him into a whimpering hot mess. <3

[depressopax]

Your voice - Dale Cooper x gn!reader SMUT

Fandom - Twin Peaks

Pairing: Dale Cooper x gender neutral reader Genre: Smut Warning(s): Sexual content. MDNI! PWP, Dom!reader/Sub!Dale. Phone sex, guided masturbation, cuss words, orgasm denial, degradation & praise.  Words: 1.4K Summary: After days apart from each other, reader and Dale decide to try phone sex to release tension.  English is not my main language, if I make any spelling mistakes please let me know so I can improve my writing! <3 || AO3 link || Masterlist || Request || 

It’s been a long day, and Dale sighs and collapses on top of the hotel bed. The king sized bed is a bitter reminder that he has no one to share it with. He’s away from home this week, working on a new case. Maybe he’s a bit overdramatic. He knows you’re waiting for him at home, but still, he missed you, though it’s only been four days. Dale has gotten used to spending his evenings with you, to touch you and fall asleep cuddled up together. But not now. He dials your number on his phone and closes his eyes as he sinks into the pillow. He waits patiently for you to pick up and listens to the waiting tone. 

“Dale!” 

“God I miss you.” He whines, not being able to hold back the neediness in his tone. Your laugh on the other line makes him shiver. “And your voice.”

“I miss you too, Dale…” The words are strong enough to melt his heart. He smiles, even if you can’t see how happy he is to talk to you. “How was your day?”

He tells you about the case, keeping you updated without spilling too much details. 

“How was your day?” He murmurs and loosens the tie, getting comfortable in bed. As always, he listens to your words but his mind quickly wanders other places. He feels a tingle in his chest and starts imagining you next to him in the cold hotel bed, keeping him warm and entertained while he tops you, or the other way around. His mind gets more dirty and he gets less attentive to your words, and more focused on his own arousal and fantasies. He lets out a grunt and you go quiet on the other line. With shame, he realizes how loud he was.

“S-sorry, I just…” He sits up in bed, his face flushed. “I got distracted. Go on”

“...Were you even listening?” 

“...Not really. I’m sorry…” 

And he means it. He presses the phone tightly against his ear and tries ignoring the naughty thoughts occupying his mind.

“Jeez, Dale… What’s going on in your head?” You don’t sound angry, rather amused. 

“About you. And all things I wanna do to you.” Dale breathes. 

“Go on.” 

“I miss you so much. Your lips around my cock, your warmth enveloping me… And I want to be between your legs.” 

“Such a slut for me.” You murmur and the raspy voice makes him grow harder and more uncomfortable in the suit pants. 

“Your fault, sunflower.” 

“Are you touching yourself?”

“No…”

“Do it.” He chuckles nervously, hoping it will get him out of the situation. “What’s the matter, Coop?” 

Your boyfriend swallows hard and squeezes his eyes shut. He’s losing control of the situation and feels a mix of arousal and embarrassment. You challenging him only makes him more frustrated. He’d do anything to have you right now. 

“Dale?”

“Hmmm? Yea, I’m here.”

“Touch yourself for me.”“I’m not gonna-”

“It was not a question.” The authority your voice carries has Dale shivering. Slowly, he pulls his zipper down, loud enough for you to hear on the other line. The tension is palpable and it feels like his heartbeat is echoing in the quiet hotel room and he strips himself down. The sound of rain pattering against the window only adds to the tension as he frees his erection. 

“Babe?” Dale's voice is hoarse and he sits up slightly in bed, swallowing hard and waiting for your next order. He feels awkward in this position. He’s never done phone sex before, but doing it with you is arousing.

“Good boy. Guess what I’m doing?”

“Oh god…” He grunts. You don’t need to finish the sentence for him to know you’re touching yourself to the sound of his voice. “You’re killing me here, darlin’....”

He bites his lip and brings his hand down, finally stroking his length since he’s not able to hold back anymore. His grunts and your moans fill the silence and for a second and it feels like you’re right there, next to him. Dale closes his eyes and pretends it's your hand satisfying him like this. Your skilled hands would only make it all feel more pleasurable. You know exactly what he likes and where he’s sensitive. 

“You close?”

“Fuck… So close, darlin’...” 

“Don’t” His hand slows down and he chuckles. He feels more bold now, and whispers directly into the speaker of his phone.

“Yea? What are you gonna do about it, love? It’s not like you can stop me from cumming, nor can you ‘punish me’” He taunts while stroking himself faster again, leaking white pearls of pre-cum over his knuckles and slender fingers. Your silence is the answer to his teasing. 

“Let’s see if you’re this sassy when I spend hours edging you. Just wait til’ you come home, babe.” 

“You’re so cruel my love…” Dale murmurs and moans loudly, his hand moving frantically over himself. His cock twitches in his hand as he spills thick ropes of warm release that warms his cold hand. 

“Oh, but I mean it” 

Dale's head is spinning and he drops his hand to the mattress, panting for air. 

“We’re not done yet, Coop.” You coo, your voice sounding sweet yet menacing. Your boyfriend shivers. “Did I tell you to stop wanking?”

“...No.”

He grunts and pretends to start again, grunting into the speaker to convince you he’s being obedient. 

“Oh Dale… You think I’m dumb? Use your hand.”

He’s startled. Do you know him that well? Enough to know when he’s pretending? With a sigh, he starts rubbing himself to grow erect again. 

“Fuck… Talk dirty to me.” 

“You don’t deserve it.” 

Your words cut like a knife and he struggles to obey your order. 

“Are you gonna be good?”

“Yes…” He pants in pure frustration as he tries getting a boner up.

“Beg.”

“Please, sweetheart… Darling, I need you. I’ll do anything,”

“That’s the spirit. I’ll keep you to that promise when you get home”

“My love… Please, help me out here.”

He groans, feeling the pent up frustration blur his mind. After being quiet for a bit only to torment your lover and make him desperate, you finally talk to him, in a smooth voice.

“If I was with you… I’d kneel for you, seating myself between your legs.”

Dale pants in anticipation, seeing the image flash before his eyes. His lust for you dizzies him and he remembers all the times you’ve sucked him off, how beautiful you look with your mouth full of him. 

“I’d make you cum so damn hard, before sliding you into me.”

He moans and once again grows hard with the help of your voice. 

“Touching myself right now, darlin’”

“I want you to imagine that’s me, squeezing around you.”

“Fuck, yes…” He grips his cock tighter and throws his head back. Sweat drips down his forehead and he jerks into his own hand involuntarily, desperate for release.

“Faster.” You order and he is too aroused to be a brat. His hand moves faster and the wet sounds of your phone sex session lays thick in the air and reduces the sound of rain against the window. Dale’s whole body is sweaty and you moan into the speaker to encourage him to continue. He can imagine you touching yourself back home, stretched out in bed with a hand between your legs. 

“Faster, Dale.” 

It practically hurts now. He continues abusing his stiff, aching cock, waiting for approval to release the tension.

“So fuckin’ close, my love…” He growls. 

“Me too.” You admit, panting loudly. “Together.”

“Together.” He repeats and finally, at your signal, releases once again, whimpering loudly as he explodes, his load painting his hand and stomach. “Fuck… That was-”

“Amazing.” You say hoarsely. The two of you lay in separate beds, and although you’re miles apart, it feels like there’s no distance between the two of you, and the connection of two hearts.

“God… I love you. I miss you so much”

“I love you too, baby. I can’t wait for you to come home.”

Neither can he. He falls asleep feeling more relaxed than he’s felt since he left home. The reason? 

Your voice. 

[depressopax]

Sightseeing - Dale Cooper x gn!reader

Fandom - Twin Peaks

Pairing: Dale Cooper x gender neutral reader Genre: Fluff Warning(s): Just light teasing and flirting. Cuss words, kinda slow burn romance. Reader is gender neutral and works as a journalist. Veryyy cheesy lmao Words: 1.6K Summary: Meeting Special Agent Dale Cooper when visiting Double R Diner English is not my main language, if I make any spelling mistakes please let me know so I can improve my writing!AO3 link

“More coffee?” 

The waitress Shelly, at Double R Diner asks you with a smile. You look up from the mess of paperworks and at the blonde woman.

“It’s needed.” You reply with a smile. She fills the cup with more coffe. “Thank you!”

“What are you doing?”

“My boss gave me this article to write. Economy stuff…”

“No more paranormal articles?”

You shrug. 

“Oh I wish… But apparently that was too much ‘bullshit’ for the newspapers.”

“He said that? I’m sorry to hear that. Norma and I liked your articles.”

“Thank you.” At least you feel a bit appreciated now. She meets your smile. “But it is what it is, I guess…” You sigh and are about to go back to the mess on the table, but get distracted when the door opens when a man in his 30’s enters. He is dressed in a suit, with a beige trench coat layered over. 

When Shelly greets him as “Detective Cooper”, your curiosity rises. 

“You haven’t met him before? He’s been here for a couple of weeks!” Shelly says to you when noticing the way you look at Cooper. “He’s a bit… Weird, but nice. He’s here almost everyday, for coffee and pie.” 

She giggles and looks his way. You can’t help but look too. He has dark-brown slicked back hair, which matches his dark eyes. The waitress notices how you stare at the special agent, and smirks.

“Ah… You got a good eye for him already? You should say hi.” 

With that, she leaves you to greet Cooper, leaving you too stunned to speak. Did she just…? Your face is burning as you look away, before it’s too obvious you’re staring at the mysterious man. You once again read through the papers and take notes, whilst fidgeting with your pen. 

“May I?” When you look up, you meet a pair of warm brown eyes. “Or am I interrupting work?”

“Not at all!” You quickly fix the mess on the table, and toss it aside so the man can sit across from you. He takes a seat, placing his coffee cup and a pie on the table. He takes off the coat and fixes the black blazer underneath. You try not to stare, but it’s difficult to look away. He’s handsome, there's no denying that.

“I’m Special Agent Dale Cooper. May I ask for your name?” 

He speaks so formally, and his voice is soft as he asks you for your name. As you tell him your name and offer a handshake, he smiles and takes your hand in his own big warm hand. 

“How long have you been in town?” You ask whilst sipping the warm coffee. 

“It’s been two weeks!”

“I see… Is it the Laura Palmer case?” You feel slightly ashamed at how curious and nosy you sound. With a chuckle you’re quick to add: “Sorry, I don’t wanna sound like a nosy journalist.”

“Aren’t you a journalist?” Cooper smirks and nods at the papers next to you.

You chuckle and meet his eyes again, and can’t help but feel warm from the way he looks at you. 

“Yea… But not one of those journalists!”

“It’s ok.. I can’t say too much, but indeed I’m working on the Laura Palmer case.”

“It’s horrible that such things happen in Twin Peaks.”

Cooper nods in agreement and looks at you with compassion, and his eyes have that shine that you already like, despite only having known him for a couple of minutes. 

“Yea… Especially such a young woman.”

You nod, and there's a heavy silence between the two of you before Cooper looks at the bunch of papers next to you. 

“So… Journalist, huh? What are you writing about?”

“Local news mostly! But there's not much going on in town. So I’m writing about politics, economy… Yea.” 

You sigh, showing your dislike a bit too much. The brown haired man looks sad for you.

“And what do you like writing about?”

“Well…” His question startles you a bit. But then you remember Shellys words: He’s a bit… Weird. Those exact same things, people tend to think about you. “I like writing about historical events in town. And… Well, paranormal cases.”

He gets a big smile on his face.

“That’s so interesting! I would love to read those articles.”

It warms your heart. Never before has someone been this interested in your work. 

The two of you get really well along. It feels like you’ve been sitting there for ages, talking shit, when you realize what time it is. 

“I should go back to work”

Dale looks a bit disappointed, and so do you. You’d love to continue this discussion. 

“I’d love to see that National Forest you mentioned.”

“I’d love to take you there… Tell me, are you free this weekend?” You realize how flirty that sounded. The last thing you want is to make someone you like uncomfortable. Luckily, he doesn’t look weirded out at all.

“I’d like that very much.”

“Well then… I’ll pick you up outside The Great Northern on Saturday at 2?” He nods, and you grab the paperwork, and gives him a quick smile. “Well then, see you later, Dale.”

As you leave, Dale’s eyes follow you, and he can’t help but admire your beauty, intelligence and way of talking. You’re also one of few to call him by his first name and he likes that. He finishes the coffee and pie, already dreaming about meeting you again. 

Silly enough, you feel nervous as you pull up with your car at the parking lot outside the hotel where Dale is staying. 

There's still 5 minutes left, but you didn’t wanna run late, since you never asked for his number. 

Is this a date? A sightseeing? Two friends meeting up? 

Deep in thought, you barely notice when Dale knocks at the car window. You open the door and let the special agent in. He’s wearing a button up shirt and black pants as usual, layered with the coat. 

“Do you have any other clothes?” 

You tease. He chuckles.

“Maybe I wanna look good?”

“You do.” 

As you drive towards the destination, you look at him with a smirk. Maybe it is a date?

You begin the Twin Peaks sightseeing at the National Forest, and you enthusiastically tell Dale about the history of the place, and its mysteries. He looks intrigued and asks questions, clearly interested - and not only to sound polite. 

“And then, we have the Owl Cave.”

“Interesting! I need to see that.”

“You seriously wanna go in there?”

“Why not? He takes the opportunity to tease you. “Scared?”

“Well, yea! It’s a weird place!”

“Then I TOTALLY need to see it!”

His enthusiasm is contagious and you can’t do anything other than agree. Maybe you need an adventure. 

Once exploring the cave, it is hard to leave. Dale asks millions of questions, walking around with the biggest smile as he tries to unravel the mysteries. It’s been one hour.

Lucky thing he’s cute, otherwise you’d be annoyed by now. 

The sightseeing continues and you grow more comfortable in Dale’s company. Just like that time at the café, time seems to run away when you are with him. As the sun starts to go down, you realize how long you’ve been out for. 

“You know, I know it’s getting late, but I don’t want to go home just yet.” he says, looking at you with a warm smile. 

“Same. It’s so beautiful here.”

There’s a comfortable silence between the two of you, as you walk away from the cave, and find a place to sit. Looking out over the town of Twin Peaks, you feel a connection to the man next to you. You hope he feels the same. The evening sun shines on his face, making him even more handsome than he already was. There’s a spark between you two, a spark that can’t be ignored. 

Sneakily, you take your hands out of your pocket, letting them fall to your sides. You move your hand dangerously close to Dale's hand, which radiates warmth. He feels your cold fingers slightly brush against his knuckles and it sends a shiver down his spine. If he had the courage, he would kiss you right here and now. But instead, he lets your fingers be intertwined. His warm hand makes you stop freezing momentarily, and together you look up at the sky. 

You still remember how good it felt to hold his hand later that night, when trying to sleep. It was a perfect date. Because it was a date, right? The day was amazing, but you’re still wondering if it’s a bad sign you and Dale didn’t kiss. 

It’s like he senses your worries. You almost throw yourself over the phone, quickly answering as Dale calls. 

“I had a good time today. It was nice going sightseeing with you.”

“I had a good time, too.” 

After a moment of silence, Dale’s soft voice melts your heart with only one sentence.

“I should’ve kissed you.” 

“You have more opportunities.”

“So… How about I take you out tomorrow… Is that too fast?”

You smile and shake your head, although he can’t see it.

“Not at all.”

“Sweet! So… Double R Diner tomorrow? My treat.”

“Yes please.”

“Good. I’ll see you tomorrow then.”“Goodnight, Dale.”

“Goodnight. I’ll dream of you. I bet your lips are sweeter than any pie in the world.”

With those words, he hangs up, leaving you standing by the phone with a blushing face. 

Now you look forward to tomorrow.

AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH I'M SO IN LOVE W THIS MAN

[depressopax]

Dale cooper nsfw alphabet pls

I got you anon!!! I'd love to post the whole thing now, but didn't have the inspiration 😭 Sorryyy Will post the next parts soon!! <3

Dale Cooper NSFW alphabet

Fandom - Twin Peaks

Pairing: Dale Cooper x gender neutral reader Genre: Smut, headcanons Warning(s): Sexual content. Reader is gender neutral and referred to as "partner" Words: 700 Summary: Dale Cooper NSFW headcanons, part 1 A-F English is not my main language, if I make any spelling mistakes please let me know so I can improve my writing! <3

A = Aftercare (what they’re like after sex)

Have said it before and will say it again

AFTERCARE KING!

Loves giving and receiving aftercare.

Sex with him can get intense - whether he’s on top or he’s bottom. 

So he appreciates some good aftercare 

He showers you with love. 

Letting you know how well you did, how good it felt etc…

Homeboy is an overthinker. He’s anxious he did something wrong “Was it good to you?”“Did I hurt you?”“Are you ok, my love?”

He also appreciates receiving aftercare after being submissive to him

Absolutely LOVES when you stroke his hair and lets him rest his head against your chest

Taking baths together, massages… You name it.

He doesn’t like going to sleep in a mess, so he cleans you and himself up, and offers to fix the bed if things get messy.

A cuddler <3

B = Body part (their favorite body part of theirs and also their partner’s)

Dale: His hands. He likes the way they can make you feel. And oh boy he knows how to use his hands. 

His fingers are long, not so thick but he definitely knows how to curl them to give you pleasure.

He really likes giving you handjobs/fingering you.

…And covering your mouth with his hand, having you sucking on his fingers when you moan to loudly

Like I said, he’s skilled with his hands and takes pride in the things he can do. (...I think I have a thing for hands, sorry not sorry)

You: - Non-sexual: Your eyes. He could stare into your eyes for hours and never get tired of them. - Sexually; he loves your lips. 

The sounds that leave your mouth during sex, the way those pretty lips feel wrapped around his cock… 

And the way you bite your lip drives him wild, too.

I mean, what’s there not to love?

Also I feel like he’s an ass guy. 

Big or small cake? 

…He eats both ;)

C = Cum (anything to do with cum, basically)

He doesn’t like leaving a mess, so he likes finishing inside condoms

…If you use condoms, ofc.

He thinks it’s hot to finish on your body, usually your face or chest, but he wouldn’t admit that. 

When you cum, he doesn’t mind a mess tho.

He likes watching you finish and is always amazed by how he manages to make you feel so good

Definitely helps you clean up after you climax

Not with a towel tho iykwim… 🤭

D = Dirty secret (pretty self explanatory, a dirty secret of theirs)

Dale has a thing for orgasm-denial, edging and overstimulation.

Sometimes when he jerks off, he edges himself just to “spice it up”

Likes it when his partners do these things to him.

There's something about the frustration of it that turns him on. He’s turned on by the thought of you having complete control of him, not even letting him control his own releases. 

He thinks doing these things to you is fun too lol

Watching you tear up as he keep denying your orgasm 

Driving you to the point where you whimper and beg for him is extremely attractive

And the intense orgasms you have when he finally allows them… 

E = Experience (how experienced are they? do they know what they’re doing?)

He’s had a few partners before, so he knows what he’s doing.

Still, he was nervous his first time with you.

He wanted to make it feel good for the both of you

He’d be especially nervous if it was your first time

Dale is very observant and keep track of how you react 

This way, he figures out just how to touch you to make you satisfied

F = Favorite position (this goes without saying)

Dale likes the “classic” positions. 

His fav is definitely missionary.

He likes how intimate it is, and wants to see your face when he thrusts into you

He also likes 69, so he can tease you with his tongue, whilst getting taken care of.

[depressopax]

Agent Coopers car - Dale Cooper x fem reader

Fandom - Twin Peaks

Pairing: Dale Cooper x fem reader Genre: Smut Warning(s): Sexual content. Smut without plot lmao, “fluff”-smut, penetration, semi-public, switch!Dale, teasing, cuss words, petnames, reader has “fem” anatomy Words: 1.1K Summary: Spicy time in Dale’s car after work <3 English is not my main language, if I make any spelling mistakes please let me know so I can improve my writing! <3 AO3 link soon!

There's fog over the town of Twin Peaks tonight. Apart from the owls hooting, the town is quiet. 

It seems most people have gone to sleep, except you and special agent Dale Cooper. 

The two of you are working on a case together, but even special agents need some time off after a long day in service. 

Dale choosing to bring you as his partner for this mission might not have been the brightest idea. Sure, he enjoyed the company, but he barely got any work done, with your subtle teasing and flirtatious glances at him. At first he was confused but he knows you, and realized what it was you wanted. He was embarrassed but pleased. 

Still, it was a bit annoying, having his colleagues asking if he’s ok, since they never see  the calm and collected agent acting flustered and distracted. 

You usually take your job seriously, but lately it’s been so much work, that you and Dale barely get any alone time together. Once you get home, late at night, none of you are in the mood, or have the energy to get physical with each other. 

Seeing your boyfriend being all serious and focused, just to make him a flustered, annoyed and blushing mess in front of the task force was too tempting to not act up on. 

Once in the car, he confronted you about the behavior. Dale is almost never mad, and you rarely have arguments. 

You could tell from his forced sweet, calm tone that he was pretty pissed off. 

…But his boner said something totally different. 

Like two love drunk fools, you couldn’t keep it in your pants nor wait until you got home before basically ripping each other's clothes off. 

God, you’ve missed his bare pale skin and those toned abs. 

With the front seats pulled back for comfort, the two of you moan in unison. Dale's arms are wrapped around you. His palms are gently pressed around your back to keep you close to him as you ride him. He lets out a soft whimper, already feeling the second orgasm build up as he buckles his hips up, driving his hardened cock deeper inside of you. You cuss out loudly as he starts kissing your chest, bringing your right boob into his mouth, flicking his tongue around the nipple as you continue bouncing on his length. 

Luckily, no one has driven past you yet, but it’s not like you care. 

Dale pulls away from your chest, looking up at you in awe, with brown eyes shining in desperation. 

“I’m gonna…” 

“Not yet, Coop…” 

You coo, continuously moving back and forth on his dick, bringing yourself close to the edge too. He starts mumbling how unfair you are but you know he likes it. His sweaty palms move down, from your back and to your ass, giving it a squeeze as he holds you still, once again slapping his hips up, filling you completely with his member. You gasp and feel your walls clench around him. You can barely continue riding, as the intense pleasure makes you freeze momentarily. 

Dale looks smug over your reaction.

“Don’t stop riding me now.” 

He murmurs, brushing a strand of hair from your wet forehead. 

Slowly, you start moving your hips again and let out loud moans from the pleasure. Dale goes from your hair, to your breast which he squeezes, and down to your wetness. He uses his thick thumb to rub lazy circles around your swollen clit and you whimper. 

“Fuck… Are you trying to take control?”

“Maybe.”

“You’re playing a dangerous game, Coop.” You hiss. “Oh fuck….”

His fingers are more rough with your sensitive clit now, and he pinches it lightly. 

“You started it… This is karma for trying to make me horny at work.”

“I succeeded.”

“Mhm… And now I’m getting revenge by driving you crazy.” 

Dale’s voice is soft as always and he smiles against your lips as you kiss. He continues stimulating you, whilst your movements get more sloppy and slow. Your legs practically feel like jelly when riding him.

“Mmm… Dale?”

“Yes, cutie?”

“You can cum now.”

Your voice is almost like a whisper.

“Can I take control, my love?” 

His voice is sweet and loving, but you know he’s teasing you. You are usually on top, and Dale is comfortable with being submissive to you. But every once in a while he likes having you at his mercy. 

You nod eagerly, too exhausted to fight back. He pulls out momentarily, just to flip you around. You are now laying on your back in the bent-down seat, Dale hovering over you, holding one hand around his erection, which he pumps slowly whilst looking at your naked body. 

You open your legs for him, your cunt dripping from arousal. He is gentle as he guides himself back into you, doing so with a grunt. 

Dale loves having you in missionary, seeing your gorgeous face as he uses long delicate strokes to satisfy himself and you. 

He watches your eyes roll back, knowing you’re completely at his mercy now. The sight makes him ache for release.

“Together?” 

He whispers, kissing your neck, being careful, but determined to leave hickeys on your cute neck. 

“Together.” 

You whisper back, resting in the seat as you let Dale be dominant for change. The both of you moan, reaching a second orgasm together. He twitches inside of you, as he releases his seeds into the condom, which is the only thing keeping you apart. Your own orgasm is intense, the pleasure making you dizzy as you cum over his cock and the warm leather seat under your naked body. Dale shivers from the wonderful feeling of his climax. He holds still inside of you as you both calm down from the intimacy you shared. 

After riding out your high, you’re panting for air, looking at the ceiling of the car. Dale pulls out his softening cock, rolling onto the bent-down seat beside yours. His warm sweaty hand finds yours, and you intertwine fingers. 

“Wow… I needed that.”

Dale says with a tired but satisfied grin. You chuckle and nod in agreement. 

“So did I.” You sigh happily and roll closer to him. “I love you Dale”

“I love you too, cutie.”

You cuddle up with him, happy to finally be in his arms again.

[depressopax]

Dale Cooper SFW headcanons

Fandom: Twin Peaks

Pairing: Dale Cooper x gender neutral reader Genre: Fluff, headcanons Warning(s): Cuss words, dirty jokes Words: 900 Summary: Being in a relationship with Dale Cooper would include…  English is not my main language, if I make any spelling mistakes please let me know so I can improve my writing! <3 Avaliable on AO3

This man… He has so much love to give you, and won’t hesitate to do so.

He sees you as a treasure and knows how to treat you like one.

His job means long days and much time apart from you. To not speak of the dangers that come with being a special agent.

He tries making up for this, though.

At work, he’s serious and focused on his tasks

At home, all his attention is on you.

ALL OF IT.

He spends his free days off work with you, either at home or going outdoors. As long as you’re together, he doesn’t care. 

He might come across as “clingy”, but he just wants your love and company.

His career means late night, so he either comes home to find you already sleeping, or sitting up on the couch watching tv. Either way, he always greets you with the biggest smile.

You try visiting him at the police station, too. Going to him for lunch, surprise visits etc… 

If he has the opportunity, he does the same for you when/if you work.

Dale is not a good chef, but he enjoys cooking for you.

Especially in the mornings.

He often ends up burning the food without realizing it

But he looks so happy when he tells you that he has cooked, and you can’t bring yourself to tell him that he accidentally burned it

He looks so smug whenever you eat his food and tell him you like it

He might be a night owl, but still gets up early in the morning. How he does so is a damn mystery.

Maybe it’s the fact he usually has weird dreams at night that makes him wake up early?

Or is he just always energetic? 

He wakes you up with kisses and the first thing you smell is coffee. 

This man is absolutely head over heels in love with you

He appreciates small gestures from you, he’s not the guy to like big romantic gestures. Like seriously, just make a cup of coffee for this man and he will swoon for you.

Dale’s love language being touch and quality time 

He likes making coffee for you, it’s his ultimate way of saying “I love you” lol

Speaking of saying “Ily”, he was definitely the one to say it first. 

You’d only been dating for a month or less when he realised how much you mean to him, and that he had fallen for you.

He feels very comfortable around you and appreciates the feeling of you jot judging him

That’s why he likes sharing his weird theories with you and rant about different cases he’s working on, wanting your take on it

Whilst other people laugh at his passion for the paranormal, you are supportive, and find it interesting too.

Which makes him very happy, since he finally can share his thoughts without getting judged <3

He also tells you about the weird dreams he has

At first, you were very concerned when Dale started ranting about his dreams of weird creatures and creepy places

…But you grew to like it. Once getting used to his weird dreams, you’re always intrigued to hear another story

If you don’t believe in paranormal stuff/you’re not spiritual - you definitely change your opinions later. He has a way of talking about it that just fascinates you to the point you also believe it.

Which only makes him love you more, if possible.

You and Dale are a pretty calm couple, but your shared love for creepy shit probably leads to Dale taking you on your own little investigations/missions

He wouldn't let you tag along to a real mission, but suggests going to abandoned places for sightseeing.

And who are you to say no to that?

Somehow, it’s almost cozy to walks hand in hand in the creepiest of places, while discussing theories and scaring each other with stories

You also make it a challenge sometimes - who gets scared first?

Spoiler alert! It’s you.

Dale is a special agent, and works with cases like this, after all. 

He’s pretty competitive, believe it or not

Sometimes, he even makes sure to make you frightened 

He likes comforting you and feeling like “the knight on a white horse”

A bit rude, I know, but he can’t help it!

“Fuck sake Dale! You did that on purpose!”“I would never!”“...”“Ok, maybe I did intend to scare you.”“I hate you”“I know you don’t… Don’t be mad at me, my love!”

Don’t worry, he does make it up to you in one way or another ;)

His ideal date would be coffee dates (what a surpriseeee) 

On your first date he took you to Double R Diners, so he could show you how amazing coffee and cherry pies they have.

He also likes taking you out on picnics, sightseeings and being outdoors with you.

But if you prefer calm dates, he doesn’t mind taking you to the cinema, or even just stay at home to watch movies and eating takeaway food

He doesn’t mind PDA - he holds your hand in public, kisses your forehead, wants you close etc…

But he prefers to kiss you when he’s alone with you

If you were to kiss him around people he’d turn into a blushing mess lmao

Dale is the boyfriend who likes staying up with you - having deep late night conversations

The two of you are pretty cheesy - slow dancing under the night sky, stargazing… You name it

Being in a relationship with Dale brings you the passion, love, adventures and amount of weirdness that you need in your life - His goal is to be the best boyfriend ever <3