#sorry not sorry five point calvinist here who believes in unconditional election and irresistible grace

[novelmonger]

I've been thinking a lot lately about how we as sub-creators can learn a about our Creator through our own little acts of creation. Particularly in the area of the fates of our characters. When they die, how they die, whether they're "saved" or not (which can mean different things, depending on the context of that particular story).

There are some characters we create for our stories, intending all along for them to die. Characters we create, intending from the first for them to be evil and to never repent and never have any sort of redemption. Because that's what the story needs.

Of course, the analogy kind of breaks down because, unlike our Creator, we are writing under the curse of sin. We can't fully understand or comprehend all of the implications of certain things happening, or why God has chosen to let them happen. So we do our best to mimic what we see, to sub-create in a way that feels authentic to us, but we can never quite reach the perfection that is God's story.

Still, writing about characters and deciding their fates, looking down on the story from the outside and understanding more than the characters in it really helps me get an idea of what that must be like for God. The characters in my stories might shake their fists at me and demand to know why a certain character had to die, or why they couldn't be saved, but I know in a way they never will why it had to happen, for the sake of the story I wanted to tell.

In a way, I find that encouraging for my own life.

(There's more I want to say, but that means spoilers for chapter 8 of TMI, so I'll put it under the cut.)

And yes, I've been thinking about this a lot in the context of Mabel. My poor, dear Mabel, whom I knew from the moment I made her into more of a character than just "Jake's mother" was going to die right in front of her father.

At one point during the writing process, I don't know why it suddenly hit me this way, but I started agonizing over the fate of my characters' souls. I guess it was because I was dreaming up ways that some of the canon characters might come to Christ, and of course that just made me want to save everybody.

But I'd written myself into the tricky situation of having a bunch of babies dying, as well as somewhat older children and an adult. To me, it's somewhat easier to accept adult characters dying, and knowing in the back of my head that, if these people really existed, they would probably end up in hell. After all, everyone is responsible for putting their faith in God, even if they only have a very limited understanding of who He is, even if only through general revelation. As Romans 1:20 says, "For his invisible attributes, namely, his eternal power and divine nature, have been clearly perceived, ever since the creation of the world, in the things that have been made. So they are without excuse."

It's harder to wrestle with what happens to babies, especially those who have died in the womb or right after, before they have any sort of capacity to understand right and wrong or who made them. But, being a Calvinist, I believe that God has predestined even them to be elect, or not, according to His will. God is just, and God is good, so all I can do is trust that He knows what He's doing.

But for some reason, my mind just kept sticking when it came to Mabel. Even though I still believe that it's God's will where she ends up, and our salvation is not ultimately determined by us choosing God, but in God choosing us...somehow it felt different. Because she's an adult, but being raised by Hydra has given her no access to the gospel, and not even really any chance to understand how the world really works, and so how can we expect her to even extrapolate truth from general revelation? Everything is stacked against her - because I stacked the story against her that way. So if she ends up in hell...does that make it my fault?

And yes, yes, I know this is a fictional character I'm talking about. But I love her. I love her like she's my own - because she is my own. She is my creation. So I'm responsible for her, aren't I?

But then, taking the analogy of me being to Mabel what God is to me, in a limited way...what determines who goes to heaven and who goes to hell? It's God. God ordains who is to live and who is to die, who He chooses to be His own people and who He does not, according to His perfect will and for His own good pleasure. If He wants someone to be saved, they will be saved - whether they've ever read the Bible or heard a sermon, whether they have the mental capacity to understand what sin and salvation mean, whether they've ever drawn a single breath. Ephesians 1:4-5 says that "he chose us in him before the foundation of the world, that we should be holy and blameless before him. In love he predestined us for adoption to himself as sons through Jesus Christ, according to the purpose of his will."

And so, if I am in a very small way to Mabel what God is to real people in the real world...and if I want her to be saved...then she is saved.

In this fictional world that I've created, with characters who are real within this fictional context, Mabel is in heaven.