#sorry my reading comprehension has gone down the shitter so hopefully this makes sense

[paunchbunny]

i wanna ask for advice, and i apologize if it sounds weird or stupid. im in the northeast and i recently transferred to a state school after doing community for a bit. it's a big school with a lot of people from all over, which was really exciting at first because i thought i'd easily find people with similar interests, and also to really get in the dating game. However, it's been hard to find people are into nerdy shit like me, which has also made it to hard to find girls because i like nerdy girls. but the hardest part, and this is where i apologize again for sounding weird or stupid, is that... i haven't really seen any fat girls here. i've seen a couple but only in passing and never again. i attribute this to my school being a party school so people who aren't really into that or are generally shy just chill in their dorms, but it really sucks because i like being social just not in the frat way, and there's really no nerd clubs or anything outside of esports. i'm just kind of disheartened because i find myself not being attracted to 98% of the girls i see here, either physically or emotionally, and the ones i do like may not be leaving their dorms because of the environment here. so ig my question where would i look for nerdy fat girls in a place like this? (again so sorry for showing how much of a dumb kid i am). i know "fat woman" isn't some universal demographic where i can go to an exact place and always find them, but what else should i do? should i look into dating apps? are there any other types of clubs or things i should look into? i also just want to note that i love feedism and fat-related kinks, but at the end of the day I just like big girls so being into those kinks isn't something that's a must in a partner.

also with that being said, and ik i made it seem completely dry here, there is one girl i've seen relatively consistently on the way to classes and in the dining halls who is really really pretty and seems like we'd have similar interests, but idk how to introduce myself. we've only walked by each other and never talked so i have nothing to work with. would it be appropriate to stop her on the way to class or walk up to her at the dining hall and say sum like "hey i've seen you a couple of times on campus and thought you were pretty" and continue from there? i just don't want to look like a weirdo trying to talk to her or make her uncomfortable.

i hope all of this makes sense despite being all over the place. if you do happen to read this i want to preemptively say thank you for taking time out of your day to read this silly shit. I'm going to be transferring out of here for next semester due to reasons outside of socializing, so maybe things will be better at my next school but i would still like to make the most out of my time and make some sort of connections. especially because i've never been in a relationship before and really want to start putting myself out there. thanks again and have a good rest of your day!

ok so I see two main questions here hopefully I give a good answer.

1)I think the idea of seeking a partner based off appearance is fruitless. Ik that sounds harsh, but from my experience, i've found I've been the happiest in relationships that I kinda find myself falling into and build with the other person. I think actively seeking someone who fits your physical preferences will leave u feeling really self conscious, it'll invite negative opportunities to go "why do they not like me am I not enough" and that shit is defeating and soul crushing. If I were you, I would prioritize school and maybe dabble in something like a dating app with no real stock in the game.

if u want to meet more nerdy ppl tho, try a local game store with game nights or maybe a local convention. both my partner and I have had success meeting other like minded ppl at places like that :3

2) In terms of the girl ur eye-ing, if she has similar interests as u, maybe point out merch if she has any. Be like "wOAH I love your Pikachu keychain, is that your favorite pokemon?" I wouldn't force anything beyond that if she doesn't seem interested in conversation. even if she has short answers and is preoccupied with getting to class, she's still gonna have that memory of "that guy who was chill and complimented my Pikachu keychain" which is inherently a plus

dont feel obligated to follow this advice, for all I know it could be the worst advice ever. Either way I'm rooting for u anon!