#sorry if this is a little too personam

[justasmallpartoftheworld]

I had that mindset ever since i really figured out i was trans, and i kept feeling dumb and guilty for not realizing sooner, but im at a point where i havent even started it yet, so instead of mourning a past that'll never be true i try every time to a future where i can make it possible. You'll never be able to take back those years, but it shouldnt be holding you back from.enjoying your future! At least thats what i tell myself.

What wouldn't I have given to be a girl in my teenage days.

To be able to do dumb things with my friends as a girl, to spend hours window shopping stuff we couldn't afford, to randomly dance to a song we listened on the radio, to fall in love and get my heart broken as a girl.

To be able to live a life.

[shippin2electricbindu]

Made some fun head cannons w/ me and Pir.anha to comfort me rn (*μ_μ) I’m sorry but I had to write something for myself because I feel so horrible rn so kinda comfort / general make me feel better stuff

It's under the cut cause I refuse to clog the feed

Although I'd like to think I'm pretty good at keeping me emotions in check, Pir.anha can immediately tell when something's up with me. Most assume he'd be oblivious but when it comes to me. He just knows

He'll make sure to take me away from the gang before asking me what's wrong since he knows how I won't give a proper answer around others since I don't like the attention.

He just understands how I explain my feelings too !! He understands what I mean by every ' sound effect ' noises or hand actions I make since sometimes I find it easier expressing motions that way, He does it too, So we just get what the other means

If it was someone, He'd probably get really mad. And tell me how if he ever sees them he'd beat them up ( Which I don't let him do. For obvious reasons ). If it's something he threatens to beat it up still for disrespecting and causing me so much anxiety / pain.

Probably still tries to beat the shit out of whatever upset me without my knowledge

We probably lay down and hug each other. Depending on how he's feeling, He'll either let me hold him close and not let go. Just, holding him and him whispering nice words to me to make me feel better.

Or if he doesn't feel like being the ' little spoon ', insists on me laying at a certian height so he can stroke my hair and will again, Whisper nice stuff to me.

I'm definetly falling asleep either way because I feel very comfortable and safe around him and he does too.

I'm someone who uhhhhhh struggles with opening themself up to others so having Pir.anha, A genuine, open book person who'd have no alterier motive to romancing me for the sake of romancing me? Because he genuinely loves ME as a person and tells me a lot?

I definetly didn't beleive it at first because I don't really let myself be loved thanks to personam issues. (ﾉд<`｡)

It means a lot more than I'd ever be able to tell him when I actually do realize he's genuine. I'd probably end up crying trying to tell him that (ฅฅ*)💦

Nothing would compare to his genuine smile when he sees me, Just. I don't deserve it but here he is, Loving my dumbass of all people :((( yghhhh

He deserves the world so I'd try to give him all that and more because I could never make or do the same for him that he's done for me. He's done so much already and it hurts.

But yeah we totally kiss a lot that's the headcannon 👌