#sorry if im clogging the tags but i have Emotions and Ideas and no one who cares about em lol

[godsdefect]

9kay take my headconshjm. it's so hot outside. I'm eleting. I'm melting. I feel like an old man how the hell do I do things on this sight without looking like an idiot

ALSO I WRITE FANFICTION. GIVE ME WHUMP IDEAS. GIVE ME ANGST IDEAS. GIVE ME ANY IDEAS. I'LL WRITE THEM. I'LL WRITE THEM FOR YOU!!!!!!!!! I HAVE NOTHING TO DO!!!!!!!!

SORRY FOR PUTTING A THIRD WALL OF TEXT HERE BUT I'M SHAKING IN MY BOOTS WHAT IF THIS DOESN'T COMPRESS AND IT JUST CLOGS UP THE TAGS????? GUYS IM 𝘊𝘏𝘖𝘒𝘌𝘚 𝘖𝘕 𝘛𝘌𝘈𝘙𝘚 I DOTN WANT TO BE ANNOYING 𝘌𝘟𝘗𝘓𝘖𝘋𝘌𝘚 𝘈𝘕𝘋 𝘛𝘌𝘈𝘙-𝘐𝘕𝘍𝘜𝘚𝘌𝘋 𝘎𝘖𝘙𝘌 𝘍𝘓𝘐𝘌𝘚 𝘌𝘝𝘌𝘙𝘠𝘞𝘏𝘌𝘙𝘌

- Trauma. The shit that he went through wasn't going to let him live the rest of his life peacefully, and a constant reminder of his trauma was the tremor he gained in his hands. Along with the tremor, little aches and pains would form in places like his back, legs, hands, just really anywhere and it would bug him to no end. His hand writing would change as well as his art style, but eventually he'd learn to navigate around it. The tremor would obviously worsen with anxiety attacks and nightmares. Speaking of nightmares, he would be embarrassed to admit he still has them pretty regularly, and he'd need about an hour to properly calm down after having one.

- He's a doodler. Usually his surroundings fall victim to being sloppily sketched into his case book or stranger's passing faces, but he takes a particular liking to drawing flowers. He likes the way the petals unfold, and this is totally not giving me an excuse to say that his favorite flower is starfighter lilies.

- Cole has a slight ick for needles. It won't freak him out too much if he has to hold a syringe or look at one, but for him to see one and knows it's going in him always makes his arms go stiff and look the other way. The pinch of it always makes him want to grit his teeth together. Syrettes especially freak him out.

- Malewife. He loves doing tasks around the house, especially doing dishes or doing laundry with his favorite outfits in them. He's found that he enjoys much simpler jobs or assignments outside of work hours due to how complex and stressful his job as a detective can be, along with cleaning and how it helps clear up his head after a long day.

- Favorite food. When people ask him if he has a favorite food he always writes off the question with a “I don't have one” because he doesn't like giving out personal info, he wants a thick emotional wall between most people in his life that he thinks keeps him safe. But I've deemed that this man has to have a simple but interesting choice of favorite food, and I've decided that to be waffles. Connected to his childhood, hard to mess up, and tasty with a few simple ingredients. He appreciates the recognizable flavor with such a humble breakfast meal, also likes them with nearly gross amounts of syrup and strawberries. No other fruit than strawberries or he can't look at them the same when they're on his plate.

- Love language is gift giving and physical touch, if coexisting in the same room doing your own thing can count as a love language, too, then count that in. Explanation on gift giving, he doesn't like directly giving the gift to his partner with the item in his hands, moreover just leaving it somwhere subtle until his partner finds it and gets surprised by something sweet. Even little things like a neat trinket he found he would bring home, maybe leave it on the nightstand of his partner's as a little way to say ‘this reminded me of you’. Explaining the physical touch thing, it has to be a certain degree of it. Touch that just confirms that someone's there, not too attention catching but just there. Also, the thing about just coexisting in the same room, it has to be somewhere he considers a safe space. His office, for example, is very very sacred to him, and when he lets someone in there to dawdle it's more of like a declaration of trust. The presence of the other would definitely soothe him and he'd stay silent, but it's still a huge milestone in the relationship he would have with someone, whether friend or romantic partner.

- How he sleeps. Usually Cole is so wound up tight that half the time if he has the whole day to sleep he'll only take a light nap before trying to do something productive around the house, although he could have the place bleached and scrubbed down twice and he would still clean it again if he had time. He generally loathes feeling lazy or unproductive to the point that he works himself into oblivion, driving to spouts of burnout/autistic burnout and general uninspiration. When things like that come around, his body moreover forces him to do things like sleep in, which is usually the only time he's ever brushed shoulders with REM sleep. Okay moving onto sleeping habits, he would definitely be a light sleeper and find himself drooling onto his pillow obnoxiously often. When he goes into deeper dozes you could throttle him and he wouldn't even feel it in his dreams. It's silly but it's a lighter side to how hellish it is for him to get some real rest.

- Cole's stance on religion. He used to be religious, but that was only when he was a kid. By the time he was a teen he just couldn't grasp that there was some big man in the sky looking down on them, it felt impossible to connect to Christianity in any kind of way. White noise was only ever heard when he asked God about something, and the first and last time he ever went to a priest about something like that he was told that he had done something wrong and that God was punishing him for it. This would obviously break Cole's heart as a young boy, but no matter how hard he tried he'd never be able to force God to acknowledge him. So he'd just give up. Religion after that would be kind of a sensitive topic for him, but he'd still say he was Christian in fear of being berated. His stance on firmly not being religious would further solidify when he was fighting in the war and as a last resort would pray to God to save his men only to see them get killed and think ‘no loving god would do this to his creation’.

- Cole gets really bad homesickness. Ever since he got home from the war leaving home would never be the same for him, especially now that he practically sees his home office as a refuge. Leaving home for work or anything like that wouldn't bother him the slightest, but being away from something he holds so near and dear to his heart for a few days would make him feel like he constantly needs to puke or that the air is unnecassarily suffocating.

- Cole is a silent crier. He will actually just sit on the edge of his bed and stare into nothing until he either wills the tears away or they just fall down his face. He’d probably just scrub them off with his sleeves and sniffle a bit before shaking himself out of it and distracting himself with work or liquor – maybe even a task around the house. He was raised thinking that the “boys don’t cry” stuff was real n all, which is really unfortunate, I feel like he would need to catch a break sooner or later or else he’ll have a breakdown at the slightest inconvenience.

[maid-of-the-golden-deer]

WAIT wait just a fucking second, when Kikila introduces the song about the visitor, long long after it was first sung, he doesn’t know it’s bad implications, so he puts a positive spin on it, and it’s only later we learn the full song, and what it actually means- which ties into what the show hints at/explores later, that stopping things like prejudice and hatred starts with the children. Like with Miya in the story of Haraiso, Uzoi and Haitora, and obviously Somali. If you grow up with and learn about other people and cultures, then there is no “unknown” to fear.

[utterlyhopeful-fics]

Shotgun Wedding

MASTERLIST

Angel Reyes x Reader

Word Count: 1.1k 

Warnings: angsty angst, language, s3 spoilers, (gif not mine!)

Marisol Reyes’s diamond sparkled underneath the grim lighting of the Mayans clubhouse. The diamond she always imagined resting on her ring finger. Y/N stared blankly at the beaming woman glued next to Angel. Y/N tried her damndest to conceal her heartache keeping a calm demeanor. As if cemented in the very place she stood, Y/N didn’t dare move a muscle at the abrupt announcement. 

Her ears rung horrendously blocking out the unwelcomed laughter and cheers. Her blood simmered rising in temperature every passing second, but Y/N swore her heart stopped beating the moment Angel wouldn’t…couldn’t look at her. Tranq’s eyes searched the room finding Y/N all too easily, a familiar sadness rested behind her eyes showcasing her inner misery.

Nails’s smile continued to irk Y/N as her fingers wrapped around an empty beer glass.

Angel’s voice boomed through the room next; “That ain’t it..we’re havin a baby!”

Hoots and hollers broke out across the room celebrating the surprising news.

Y/N froze too stunned to glance up from the wood counter she was currently staring holes in. Ezekiel’s eyes followed suit; pity filled and genuine disbelief. Didn’t seem like big bro told him either. Suddenly glass shattered forcing Y/N’s gaze downwards, blood danced down her palm moving delicately towards her wrist. Two shards embedded deeply into her hand as her eyes bulged at the growing mess.

Tranq moved quick grabbing a towel. He hesitated sizing up the shards and their removal. His lips moved but Y/N didn’t hear a thing. A minor pinch resonated from her palm glancing down at the removed bloodstained pieces. Angel chanced a glimpse towards Y/N knowing the damage had been long done.

“Y/N?”  

She merely nodded applying more pressure to the cut.

Her voice dead-panned void of any emotion; “Shit, I spaced. Sorry bout the glass.”

His brow scrunched upwards at the overtly monotonous tone. Meanwhile, Y/N busied herself wiping up the crimson liquid. Not more than five seconds later her back was to him as she rushed to the back room. Tranq tailed her closing the door behind him. Her chest heaved unable to catch her breath as she paced in circles.

“Say somethin, anything…”

Y/N stopped, her eyes pierced his gentle ones; “Did you know?”

Without hesitation, Tranq answered; “No idea.”

He sounded just as hurt as she did causing concern to spread throughout her shivering frame; “I thought you and Nails were—”

“Me too. Guess not.”

Unshed tears begged for release but Y/N fought harder. Her voice sounded broken, laced in pain; “I hate him.”

Tranq rubbed her shoulder soothingly; “I’m sorry. I’m so fucking sorry, Y/N.”

Her shoulders deflated; “It’s not your fault. It’s fucking mine for giving him another god damn chance.”

“Stop. They made their choice. Does it fucking suck? Hell yeah, but it’s outta our hands for good. Don’t let that shit spread.”

“Your optimism is annoying as hell.”

His hand grazed over her chin keeping her attention; ““He doesn’t deserve you; he never fucking did.”

“And she’s a total bitch for blowing you off and running back to him the second he turns her damn direction.”

“I don’t want to hurt like this anymore, T. Angel will never choose me and that’s a hard pill to swallow. But seriously? Seriously? He fucking parades her around, proposes to her, and then knocks her up?! What fresh hell did I walk into tonight?”

“You and me both.”

Her fingers carefully grazed along the liquor bottles aligning the farthest wall; “I think I’m going to miss you the most.”

Confusion clouded his thoughts; “You—you’re leaving?”

“I have to. I can’t just stay here and watch him play house. Angel’s left me no other choice.”

Tranq closed the gap between them bringing her into his chest. Her arms wrapped around him trying to memorize every possible detail.

“I still have a phone, ya know. I’ll keep you in the loop, promise.”

“You are worth finding. Worth knowing. And undoubtedly worth loving. Don’t let him take that away.”

“You, my friend, have a way with words. This isn’t goodbye.”

“Just a see you later?”

The hallway light shone brightly as the door swung ajar. Picking up one foot in front of the other, Y/N stride didn’t falter instead focusing her energy straight ahead on the exit until an unwelcoming voice echoed out for her.

“Y/N, wait up!”

She began a light jog attempting to make a clean getaway. Heavy footsteps clogged about alerting her of another presence. Y/N fumbled for her keys but not before Angel Reyes caught up.

“There’s nothing left to say, Reyes. Your announcement made that crystal clear. Now go the fuck away.”

“At least gimme a minute to explain.”

“Explain what? How you told me you loved me TWO DAYS AGO and then proceeded to propose to your fuck buddy? Oh, congrats on the baby by the way. I hope you both burn in hell.”

Angel held her arm keeping her in place; Y/N fought against his grasp; “You’re a selfish, irredeemable shell of a bastard.”

“I know.”

“I love you, all of you so damn much. But I’m sick and tired of the bullshit. You’ve obviously made your decision, Gel. I gotta get out of here for a while.”

Guilt ran down his spine seeping into his stiff bones. Angel opened his mouth but no words followed. Not once in the last twelve hours had he stopped running at full speed. Now with the dust finally settling, Angel’s actions finally caught up with him.

“C’mon, don’t be like that.”

Her jaw nearly hit the ground at the audacity of this asshole; “I bet your fiancé is looking for you. Should probably head back.”

The words held a finality Angel wasn’t sure he was ready to embrace. His mind screamed at him to be honest, to tell Y/N she was the reason he got outta bed every day. But then Nails told him she was pregnant and the rest of the world became a blur. Angel never actually expected to lose Y/N. Now his reality had shifted, altered on its very axis and there wasn’t a goddamn thing he could do about it. The car door creaked open and shut in record time. Blurred headlights were all that remained as the distance grew further and further between them. Crickets chirped far too loudly as the silence set in. It was time for Angel to let Y/N go even if his heart resisted.

 ~~~~~~~

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[fullmoondagger]

I was tagged by @datmoki !~

(_-In general-_)

Real name: Won’t put my real name there buddy, I don’t think it defines me much. Nicknames: Fullmoon, Full, Flouff, Demo, Dumdum and probably some more. 
Sexuality: Pansexual / Homoromantic 
Preferred pronouns: He or They, I don’t mind both ! 
Are you a morning person?: No, morning sucks. I mean, it’s pretty and all, but all the shops on Animal Crossing are closed and the friendos are asleep, so I have nothing to do awakened in the morning. 
When swimming, do you prefer to do it in the ocean, or in a lake?: If I really had to submerge myself in a body of water, in the dark, fully clothed, and without ANYONE AROUND, I’d be totally down for a lake. Oceans are gross and pools are rather often clogged by humans.

(_-On tumblr-_)

Anyone you would like to meet in real life?: My friendos @datmoki and @roublardise because they’re nice beans and I want to hug them both. 
Anyone you have met in real life?: The two dorks I mentionned up there! When did you first join? How old is your current account?: I have no idea. It was after I read Homestuck so a year ago ? Maybe two ? Time is a lie anyways. 
Any peeves?: When people use that “^^” emoticon after EVERY SINGLE ONE OF THEIR SENTENCES because that makes me uncomfortable and it makes me think I’m bothering them or they’re mocking me. When I’m on a voice chat and someone misgenders me because of my voice and they’re like “oh man im sorry i didnt know like your voice and all-” YES HUBERT, I KNOW MY VOICE IS FEMININE JUST STOP APOLOGIZING AND LET’S GO BACK TO WHAT WE WERE TALKING ABOUT. Oh, and when people point out my quirks. OH boiii (: I’m not gonna get started on that because I’m gonna write a book if I do. Unpopular opinion: The first generation of MLP from the 80′s is awesome and I love the style and the stories. Everyone seems to spit on G1 and it makes me sad.

(_-Feelings-_)

Do you easily get jealous?: I don’t think so. Getting over admirative of a person might be the closest I could get to being jealous I think. 
Do you easily get angry?: It depends. Just a few misplaced words and I SNAP and become a salty motherfucker, but I often isolate myself to calm down because I hate being angry. 
Are you easy to cheer up?: Yes ! I just need to talk to a friend or watch a cartoon and it calms me down. 
Are you good at hiding your emotions?: I don’t know. When I’m not feeling fine, I usually turn into a fucking stone so I think it’s easy to spot because I’m usually all cheery and lively. What’s the very best way to cheer you up?: Hugs, cartoons, sending me shitty memes, just chat and scream about characters, and food.

Relationships:

Are you currently in a relationship?: Yep! Do you currently have a crush on someone?: Yes, and I’m dating him :p 
If yes, might that someone be reading this?: Nope, he doesn’t have a Tumblr. Yet. Do you kiss on the first date?: No, I’d prefer knowing the person before touching them. Do you prefer going out, or staying home, when it comes to dates?: Staying home. A home is safe, the outsides are evil. If some shit happens I prefer to be in a place I know to fix the problems easily.

Things:

Favorite drink: TERF tears Iced tea ! The cheaper the tastier ! Favorite food: Pizza, humborgorz, the pasta I cook (they’re heavenly) and carrot cake. Most calming place?: My bedroom, some universes in my head, any forest but the ones with green fluffy moss are the best. Bonus points if there’s a river near by. Even a Minecraft forest, I don’t care. Most stressful place?:  School, anywhere with a lot of people I don’t know actually. 
Most prized possession?: My friends (I don’t “possess” them but I’m happy to have them around), my computer and my 3DS. Anything my friends gave me too, these are magic items. Especially Fullmoon Jr.

I have no idea who to tag, sorry!