#sorry idk how to properly tag thus

[darlingpwease]

HELP this became much longer than I thought it would get I’m so so sorry :’)

ITS 2.6K WORDS IDK HOW IT GOT THIS BIG

-panna cotta

Warnings/Tags?: hinted fear kink, hinted humiliation kink, choking, sensitive Yuuta <33, hinted marathon sex at the end, I have no idea what to put here honestly

AHHH omg slime!reader?? Ik you already wrote about it, but it’s still wonderful all the same :DD

You are literally making so many ideas pop into my mind, absolute genius you are, Dove.

With this scenario, I’ll use sweetest baby Yuuta <33

Yuuta is such a gentle darling, sweetest thing possible, isn’t he?? So cute, so cute…

However, he would always be caught up with things, and be very exhausted. He’s a very hardworking person, so he doesn’t get as much relaxation or alone time as he’d like, never able to properly have time to himself, even if he gets frustrated sometimes- if you know what I mean..

Thankfully, though, he was recently able to get a week off, all to himself! When he was told, he couldn’t help but get excited, a whole week, where he can just take a break and relax? To be able to have some privacy, without needing to worry about suddenly having to take care of any jobs? Listen, he loves being able to help out, however, everyone needs a break at some point, you know??

Thus, he decided to go and head to a nice, calm area, and rented out a hotel room for his week off.

The first two days, he slept. He was exhausted, he was drained, so he was taking advantage of being able to finally catch up on some long needed rest, especially when he couldn’t help how dreadfully heavy his eyelids were when he laid down in his bed.

The third day, however, was quite different. He woke up late, and after lounging around for half an hour, it dawned on him that he truly has no proper idea on what to do. He could go out, maybe take a nice stroll, the weather today was nice after all. He was mainly focused on trying to sleep properly without being interrupted, maybe he shouldn’t have booked this place fore the whole week… He got too ahead of himself…

He stares up at the ceiling in a daze before he slowly heats up. It’s not noticeable at first, but when he begins to breath even just the slightest bit heavier, his inhales and exhales becoming just slightly more quicker, heavier, when he can help but squirm in place, eventually sticking his arm between his thighs, moving his hips up and down slightly– he thinks he has an idea on what to do.

Sliding his pants off, he can’t help but tease himself, gently grazing his fingers over himself, but not doing anything more, hissing slightly from sensitivity even though he has barely even done anything… he slightly rubs up and down, still not touching the way he should be touched, when he pulls away, there’s still a surprisingly hefty amount of precum coating his fingers… he can’t help but let out a soft groan.

Thus, he spends the third day teasing himself, and the third night thrusting his fingers in until by the time the fourth day comes, he’s sobbing on how little it seems to be for him, how he wants more, how he really really needs it.

He looks at ways he can feel better, only to stumble upon a website for toys. He’s thought about getting one before (maybe an onahole, or even a dildo? Those small vibrators seem good too, enticing–), but he never truly had the time to properly think about it before.

As he scrolls, and scrolls, he stumbles upon the monster toy area, and he can’t help but feel a throb between his legs. He knew that spending all his time with Rika and other cursed spirits warped his mind, but he didn’t know it was to this extent! He shyly looks through the options before he sees one that catches his eye,

“New and improved, Slime! Have a NEW way to play and enjoy yourself, with each product having a unique ‘personality’ every time! No Slime is the same here, so enjoy it! On sale NOW, with 24 hour shipping!”

Seeing that the reviews were very positive, he can’t help but give in, thinking that, well, if he’s on a break, he might as well enjoy it, right?

In putting his room number and the hotel address, he can’t help but wait in excitement for his new package to arrive. What would it be like? Would it be soft? Thick like honey? Watery? How would it treat him? Would it caress him slowly, or just jump on him right away??

His imagination ran wild, and the more ideas that came, the more possibilities, he felt he was going crazy, weak in the knees!

After waiting for hours and hours on end, he finally heard a knock on the door. He slid his pants back on with speed, stumbling towards the door, opening it for the delivery man to smile and give it to him. It was a dry smile, eyes shifting between the box and Yuuta, before walking away.

An oddly sweet feeling of humiliation ran, no, shot right up his spine as he stood in the doorway, holding the box close. A sense of shame ran through him as he looked at it, the plain, brown cardboard box before closing the door, heading to his room, proceeding to open it.

A round tube is inside, with instructions on the side. There is a square plastic window showing that inside the tube is a light blue liquid. Above the square are big bold letters spelling out “Darling”, the slimes name, perhaps?. He turns it around, before looking at the lid on top which seems to have two buttons on each side, lightly colored letters printed “press both at same time!” with arrows pointing to the two.

Reading the instructions, it merely says “Open the lid by pressing buttons then twisting. Drop 8-12 warm water droplets onto Slime, wait 20 minutes, then have fun with your slime, {DARLING}!!”

…huh… okay then…

Quickly grabbing a small cup of warm water, he opens the tube before awkwardly placing you onto the covers of his bed, shaking with anticipation as he feels heat constantly throbbing throughout his body. Dripping 10 drops onto you, he waits.

Panting, he takes his pants off once more while shuffling uncomfortably. 20 minutes, 20 minutes– since when has 20 minutes been so. damn. long..?

Gazing at you, he can’t help but get needy. Reaching down, he slowly starts to play with himself, harsh huffs leaving him as he grinds.

After doing so for a few minutes, he notices that you begin to move, slowly, but you definitely moved. When he originally placed you on his bed, you were barely the size of both of his fists together, but the more you sluggishly moved around, the larger you became. He couldn’t help but slow down, staring at you in awe as you eventually grew to be roughly around his size.

Yuuta couldn’t stop his legs from trembling (from fear? from need?) as you trudge forward towards him. Long slime appendages reach towards him, gently touching his chest. It wasn’t too hot, or too cold, but it felt gooey, almost like syrup as you dragged it up from his chest to his cheek. He couldn’t help but start shaking, his breathing coming out a bit too loud for Yuutas liking.

More appendages come from you as you begin to cover Yuuta, drooping over his thighs, his lower back, gripping his wrists and placing them behind him, leaving him unable to move them. You cover his chest, which seemed all flushed. While you’re doing so, Yuuta seemed to have froze up, not knowing what to do.

You’re touching him, you’re touching him.

And god does it feel weirdly good–

You don’t do anything at first, just slowly sliding around him. But once you touch him in between his legs, Yuuta lets out a shaky gasp. That felt good– you do it again, with more pressure this time, and he lets out a whimper, trying to clamp his legs shut, only to then realize that even if he did, it wouldn’t do anything.

You get in some kind of rhythmic tempo, trying to get more sounds out of him, more whimpers, more gasps, a moan– as you do so, you play with his chest, slowly sliding up his back as he begins to let out more adorable sounds.

Shaky breaths leave Yuuta between lewd whimpers. Wet squelching is heard through his ears and he can feel his blush grow. A red tint flourishes on his ears, down to his nape as he can’t help but mewl at how fucking good you feel–

As he lets out symphonic moans, you nudge against his hole, causing him to jolt.

He can only let out a quick “Ah- wait– !” Before you immediately push in, filling him in almost an instant and causing him to let out a cry. You don’t move immediately, twisting another appendage around his waist, up his back until you drag it up from his neck and across his mouth.

In a dazed panic, he tries to shut his mouth, but you seem to somehow notice and shoot it into his mouth before he could close it. You seem to curiously move around in his mouth, pressing against his cheek, the roof of his mouth, and even play with his tongue. The sticky, heavy feeling in his mouth causes Yuutas eyes to flutter slightly, muffled groans leaving him as you seem to press further until you begin to slowly move down his throat.

Choked gurgles leave him, he can’t breath, he panics. Despite huffs leaving his nose, he can’t help but still feel like he cannot breath at all… He’s scared, yet why does he still feel turned on? Is he seriously doing this? With a slime??

You begin to move in him, all sloppy and goopy, yet with a hard movements that leaves him being dragged up and down the sheets from the force. You don’t stop playing with him, thrusting in both his hole and his mouth as gurgled sobs leave him.

He can’t breathe, he can’t breathe, he can’t move, ohgodhecantdoanythingbuttakeitand–

And it feels so fucking good–

His head gets thrown back as he spams, tightening up around you as he cums.

You release his mouth, and he sputters and heaves while long, shaky moans leave him, back arched and body trembling.

He looks, or, well, tries to look at you with wonderfully glazed eyes as he gasps out a quiet ‘darling’

You slow down for a second, leading Yuuta to think that you would stop and let him relax, only for him to be turned to his side as you lift one of his legs up, and thrust deeper inside him.

Tears and drool dribble down his flushed face as you hit him deeper and deeper, not giving him a break. A hard grind against his groin while you continuously thrust impossibly deep into him has him cumming again.

He sobs as he came again embarrassingly quick. He feels like he could drown in shame, and the noises surrounding him of you getting so deep in him, and the embarrassing ones leaving him makes him want to hide forever.

How is it so good, why is it so good–

The longer you keep going, the more Yuuta feels like he is losing his mind, he can barely think, talk… Hell, if you weren’t holding him up right now, he wouldn’t even be able to hold himself up!

As the night progressed, you don’t show any signs of slowing down. Harsh, cruel thrusts are still given to Yuuta. You keep going for so long, that from the fourth evening which you started, you are still going by the morning of the fifth day.

Now on his stomach, all he can do is lay there, face laying on a drool stained pillow as you have his hips lifted, legs all weak.

You finally let go of his wrists, instead gripping onto his waist surprisingly tight as you crawl part of you up to his neck, putting pressure on it.

Hoarse cries leave his lips, his eyes all beautifully red as tears keep streaming from them. His eyes all hazy, unfocused, as they roll at every thrust. Drool leaving a puddle underneath him as his mouth is kept ajar– he calls out (or tries too, at least) to you, slurred ‘darling’s, ‘more’s and ‘harder’s can be heard from him, albeit slightly.

The pressure on his neck leaves his vision even more blurry, he can hear how fast his blood is rushing, feel the addictive adrenaline rushing through his body, and when you hit that spot inside him juusst right– fuck, fuck it’s too good– he couldn’t stop himself from cumming once more.

You don’t even properly realize, but once you let go of his neck, you slide up just that little bit more, gripping onto his hair only to see his blissed out face is no longer conscious.

Only then do you stop. Pulling out gently, you lay him down with a softness that wasn’t shown before. You’re not exactly sure on what to do now, do you go back in your tube? Do you stay with your pretty person?

He’s so pretty… You caress his damp hair, making it sticky but you don’t seem to care.

When Yuuta wakes up, he feels sore all over. His throat hurts, his wrists, shoulders, neck, his legs, his hole really hurts… He can’t help but flush in shame. Everything hurts, but he can’t help but like it, especially after how good he felt, it was so good, sosogood–

His thoughts are halted once he realizes that he has no idea where you are. Where the hell could you have gone??

As he looks around, getting ready to try to look for you (he doesn’t even know if he can walk, he can’t even feel his legs), he sees you in the corner of his eye heading towards him. Shooting a look towards you, he can’t help but blush again, he has to calm down, he has to but he can’t help but want you to pounce on him again and just make him feel so damn good again, youre a slime what the fuck is he thinking—

You move towards him and hand something to him, a glass of water. He lets out a dry ‘thank you’ before he coughs, trembling arms reaching towards the glass as he drinks it shakily. While he does so, you pat him on his head lightly before leaving once more.

Where are you going…??

You come back again with a plate with a poorly made cheese sandwich, and once you lean in towards him, Yuuta can’t help but let out a sweet laugh.

The fifth day was mainly Yuuta recovering and you taking care of him (as much as you could, considering you mainly only knew how to sensually please humans). But as the sunset, while you pet Yuuta with a sticky appendage, Yuuta can’t help but lean in just a little closer, and he grips on (as much as he could, anyway) just a little harder… And when he rubs his cheek against you, with half lidded eyes, when he mumbles out ‘darling’ under his breath–

Even when all he did was call out to you, the look in his eyes says it all. The rubbing of his thighs together, the ways his breathing seems to grow heavier by the second, the way he flushes…

You pause, he is so so pretty, so beautiful–

Yuuta notices you pause and his chest tightens, why aren’t you responding? He shuffles closer to you, he leans in closer to you, brows scrunching up as his eyes being do water, ‘darling…’ he kisses your appendage, worried you may not do anything, he says

“Darling, darling please fuck me.”

Why, when such a pretty doll is calling out to you, what else can you do but indulge him? <33

cw xenophilia, dubcon, elements of cnc, elements of somnophilia, rough sex (choking), breeding, elements of cum (slime?) inflation (g.), hyperstimulation (g.),

to be honest, I have been thinking for a long time about how best to formalize my answer, and I came to the conclusion that I will write a separate post so that yours looks independent. of course, it may not be important to me, but!!! this is a real drabble!!! I can't let it be the same as other ideas... I will make my main answer as other post. you should. it should shine on this blog without me. I'll join later.

I just want to say that I'm on my knees it's absolutely amazing, thank you so much for your hard work and a huge brain, it's so,,,,,, ajsghsvdhdbd good,,,,,

yuuta, who understands that he definitely likes it when you fucks him unconscious, because it turns out to be the most effective way to spend all his energy — and even if his body hurts, he is so happy, feeling finally satisfied <333 when you completely fill him up like fingers can't — and any toy, he's sure — and Yuuta can only tremble a little, feeling how you care about making him feel full, but not overfull, sliding between this edge as well as when you make him cum again, holding hard enough to make it look like he's riding you, but you feel that if you let him go, he will fall </3

or when he is playing with you, gently pushing the almost gelatinous mass with fingers, treating you like a stress toy, trying to somehow take care of you with a massage (as far as possible, trying not to touch you too roughly and not to let fingers slip inside, even if he really like this feeling) or sleeping together (even if wakes up in a mess from another orgasm) — when Yuuta looks at how something that should be responsible for the absorption of nutrients is twitching inside you,,,,, he can't help but blush even more, especially if you ask what he's looking at <333 maybe he wants to feed you some more? see how your body copes with everything you squeeze out of him while he whines about what 'you're inside' and 'how good it is' <3333

his mouth, feverishly contracting when you push inside, moderately blocking his ability to breathe, feeling him tremble with fear and need; when Yuuta thinks he can't control anything while you carefully react to any of his movements and sighs, taking care that he reaches as many orgasms as he can <333 his body doesn't react exactly the way you thought it would the first time, but that's fine, you'll make sure you keep him in yourself often enough and find sensitive places in him until Yuuta becomes suitable for more interesting things.

but while this is not the case, you are still happy!!! you have the pretty human, the dripping needy hole and he whines delightfully when clings to a sheet or pillow while you crawl over his body, hot with excitement and shame, taking care that he is as exhausted as possible from how much you demand, making him to moan and shout your name while you fill him up or stay for a few minutes inside filling as much as he can stand for a couple of minutes before exiting, simulating orgasm only to feel him cum again from it <3333

you can't be an even happier slime, even when he asks you not to leave him (as if you can) or just lie with him, hugging — perhaps of all the slime you are the one who is the luckiest <3333

(in the morning, you still help him wake up with the help of a long-denied orgasm.)

HE GETS OBSESSIVE WITH YOU ANYWAY!!! you are reasonable and understand him (and even capable of clear answers even if using other ways of interaction) and you never leave him. his life with Rika has definitely not taught him anything healthy.

[fictionkinfessions]

Hey, 🌻,🔺🔫 here. My post had nothing to do with incest. I was literally just talking about how I missed him wanting my company. Not everyone is canon complacent. The Eden plan canonically is super vague and incest is only one of the possible interpretations of it. Just thought I’d let you know. Please untag my shit and don’t listen to that anon. Really upset that that’s what was taken from my really personal experience and pain. Sorry but fuck you anon.

I genuinely apologize for tagging it with that. I never watched the series and often only go off of what other people warn me about. Much like many other sources. It's been removed now.

I also apologize for my kinda snarky reply there. Sometimes people try to be cute and vague about their incest ships which I feel is shitty because 1) I don't know their inferences, thus 2) I can't tag it properly which leads to people getting triggered. Please let me do my job tagging CWs. Heavy topics like incest aren't banned here because I aim to CW tag them for everyone's comfort. That's the point.

Anonymous asked: Hey, calling them "the trigun incest guys" is like super fucking gross and super fucking weird of you anon. There is literally no canon incest in Trigun. The Eden plan is literally not incest, it never was. It's literally JUST the utopia pipe dream of a toxic and possessive brother who feels betrayed that the only family he'll ever had turned his back on him, but go off I guess. I really think people need to mind their business more. This shit happened to me when I made a very vulnerable confession about my brother and someone called me weird for it and said to tag it as incest. If we were posting about incest, we wouldn't be vague about it. There's plenty of confessions about that on this blog. Thank you. ~ A very insulted Millions Knives Anonymous asked: Sorry actually my last message may have been really mean I just hate people taking one interpretation of my source and deciding I’m a bad person based on it. We do not see things the same way and that is okay but like don’t pretend your idea of source is more correct than mine.

Also yeah it's really weird. Y'all sometimes it's not incest. People just love their siblings in a normal platonic fashion. If one reads incest into that, idk what that says about a person. You have a inclination towards media analysis? I have no idea what goes on in the source, and sure, maybe it can be interpreted as incest? But one should remember that people often speak from the point of view from their personal canons. No matter how much it sounds like the main source canon, we'll never know anymore than a brief look from a single confession. I also assume maybe the fandom jokes about 'plant incest' or whatever which could lean into not giving it the proper consideration. Incest isn't a joke or meaningless to a lot of people. Not to mention fanon tends to take priority over actual canon source in fandom spaces, which rewrites what really happened in the source media.

And no you have every right to be mad about being accused of incest. That is a really serious topic that shouldn't be without tact and respect and consideration for multiple parties involved with it.

Connie / mod party cat

[anonymous-dentist]

Hi anon, sorry to bring the sbi family fanfic discussion again and for the long post , (your posts ware what made realize why i hated this thing so much)

I don’t know if is the same type of fans but i noticed that some ficwritters that are really foucused on philza and wilbur (and sbi family i think?) Are kinda trying to add cellbit to this situation? Like i read some philza focused fanfic where he interacts with cellbit and the ficwritters act like cellbit is his kid? Its weird idk how to explain very well (this is also the same people that kinda write cellbit as a native english speaker (american and european) and not a brazilian (its something that is too hard to explain right now)

And its kinda stressing me out because cellbit is written in such a weid way and its infesting the spiderbit tag lol and i dont understand what is going on half of the time since idk what the hell sbi even is (brazilian with 0 understanding about english speaking mcty)

Sorry for the long post

Oh yeah no I don’t really get it but like. I also do! Because q!Phil has become one of only a literal handful of people on the island to actually properly trust q!Cellbit and so they’re like. Friends. But obviously you can never just be friends with someone not your age and so. Fandom assigned family dynamic. It’s super weird and lowkey like. Idk it’s just weird lol.

A discussion surely must follow!

First, a brief rundown of SBI:

SBI is Sleepy Boys Inc., a group made of up streamers Philza, Wilbur Soot, Tommyinnit, and Technoblade. (Originally it was just Phil, Wilbur, and Techno, but Tommy wiggled his way in somehow.) They’re Best Friends, but somewhere along the way their fandoms said. Fuck it. Family dynamic… mostly because the ccs lowkey thought it was funny and ran with it. Wilbur alone would rather die than not have Philza Minecraft be his father

This dynamic spread to their characters on the dsmp despite them literally not once ever referring to each other all as family; iirc Techno himself said he at least wasn’t part of the family because that dynamic would be fucked up after all the shit his character did to both c!Wilbur and c!Tommy. But c!Phil was c!Wilbur’s father even though he did fully murder his ass, and Wilbur and Tommy were brothers because they’re Wilbur and Tommy and you’d have to kill them to stop them from being brothers. Tommy was never established to be c!Phil’s son, and Phil never seemed to consider him one

But then the dsmp started dying around summer 2021 and everyone was kinda just left with fanon, and SBI fanon can get weird. I’m talking borderline fetishistic nuclear family stuff, especially when you get into ‘Dark SBI’ content with Phil kidnapping Tommy or whatever and forcibly making them family? It gets weird, take a look through the tag sometime

The thing with a lot of these fics is that like. It’s gotten to a point where it’s a fandomized version of both cc! and c!SBI with some really freaky characterizations and some really diehard fans. I’ve talked about that before, so I won’t do it again.

The weirdest thing I’ve noticed about these fics, though- and this goes back to what we were talking about with Cellbit inexplicably being added to the mix all of a sudden- is that everybody has to be a family.

You’ll be hard pressed to find a SBI fic where the characters have friends. Even Tubbo and Ranboo, usually delegated to a ‘Tommy’s friend!’ role despite them not interacting much like as a group ever are treated either as extensions of Tommy himself or as his found family ‘brothers’ who Phil also inevitably helps take care of rather than as friends, and they act that way. Niki isn’t usually ever written in as Wilbur’s friend, she’s Benchtrio’s sister/mother-figure, or she’s described as Wilbur’s found family sister. Jack Manifold? Lumped in with Niki with Benchtrio as their older brother/father-figure. Quackity? Either Wilbur’s boyfriend, thus a member of the family, or Tommy’s older brother/father-figure.

Even characters who never really interacted with SBI as a “family” on the dsmp get this treatment: you’ll read an SBI fic with c!Purpled in it and he’ll be Tommy’s brother figure. c!Sam is Tommy’s father figure. Schlatt is Tommy’s uncle or Wilbur’s brother. Puffy is an aunt. Sapnap and Dream? Tommy’s brother or father figures. Even Hannah is being written as Tommy’s cool older sister figure these days despite only really interacting with him once on the smp

And you can see this kind of behavior continuing now in the qsmp fandom… if the new ccs/characters in question aren’t “problematic”. Chayanne can’t see Techno as a personal hero, he has to see him as an older brother or an uncle. Tubbo is Phil and Fit’s son and Tommy’s brother. Niki is Tallulah’s mom. Quackity is Wilbur’s boyfriend.

What you’ll actually be hard pressed to see is this kind of dynamic with Phil and other, “problematic” ccs, aka ccs who aren’t like. English ccs.

Because you won’t find q!Forever included in the family dynamics despite him basically being q!Phil’s best friend and closest confidant. It took longer for q!Missa to be added to Phil’s wiki page than it did for Techno to despite them literally being explicit canon husbands, and you’ll be lucky if Missa is even mentioned in a “qsmp” SBI fic. Etoiles? Not even mentioned despite him and Phil more or less actually leaning into the family dynamic with the “brothers” thing. Even Tallulah and Chayanne are left out or mischaracterized in “qsmp” SBI fics, giving Tommy the spotlight.

You won’t find nearly anybody who isn’t an English cc in these fics, and this is NOT accusing anyone of xenophobia. It’s most likely just because the SBI people are used to watching only Phil or only Wilbur and they don’t speak enough of the other languages to really care about the non-English ccs and thus disregard their characters and lore. It’s not just SBI people who do this, it’s plenty of people speaking every language on the server not watching anyone whose languages they don’t speak. Yk?

But that brings us to q!Cellbit, and I’m surprised the SBI guys have latched onto him the way they did considering he’s everything they seem to dislike: his first language isn’t English, he doesn’t talk with Phil a lot, he and Tallulah get along really well, he makes fun of Wilbur being gone. And, honestly? The SBI guys did hate him for a long time because of those things, they constantly undermined his efforts and said Phil would be a better Order leader and said that he should never speak to Tallulah again because he was making her sad and he’s friends with their least favorite person ever, Forever.

But then q!Phil said he trusted Cellbit, and it’s like a switch was flipped. Starting around the Pills Arc when they first teamed up, SBI people were suddenly on board with Cellbit despite being part of the haters literally days before. Why? Well. Phil and Cellbit are friends now, and so now he gets the privilege of being in the fics.

The problem with this is that these people have never watched Cellbit. They’ve seen ten minutes of him total from Phil’s pov, and that’s all they’re going to use to write his character. So of course there will be mischaracterization.

And, of course, they’ll be family. Because, as I said, there’s this weird allergy to the concept of friendship in SBI fics. You’re family or you’re an enemy.

Constant fanon mischaracterization of Phil has basically turned him into a universal father figure even if he doesn’t have that dynamic with the characters he’s like the “father” of. q!Cellbit’s only familial figure outside of his actual canon family is generally seen as q!Bad, who even referred to him as family last night on stream. But, because Phil and Cellbit are friends now and Cellbit is younger than Phil is, they have to have a father-son dynamic, because that’s what Phil’s only character trait is in the SBI fics he’s in. He’s the dad whether it makes sense or not.

If that makes sense.

[piggyinthemiddle]

Hi sorry I'm too shy to DM but your bio says your single- do you meet people from the Internet? I'd love to feed you and get to know you. How single are you on a scale from 0-10?.😭😂 SORRY IF THUS IS CREEPY I DINT MEAN TO YOU CAN SAY NO

Wanted to ignore this at first (shame on me) but it was kinda sweet so I'll answer it:

I'm sorry, but I don't have intentions of meeting followers/people from the internet, tbh I'm rather terrified of that idea (I bet you're a lovely person, sorry!). I love the chats, I don't mind exchanging pics, tips, encouragements, fantasies, role plays, amazing stuff. But no irl meetings.

And for the single thing: I haven't properly updated my bio & pinned post in a few weeks. I'm not single anymore, I have a girlfriend irl. 🙂‍↕️

No tags bc idk what to tag this with except for my own

[ectonurites]

TIMBER IS ENDGAME!!!

Sorry I’m just excited after reading the new issue of Tim’s solo but they basically confirmed it with this issue and I’m so excited!

okay so three things, sorry in advance if i sound snippy with any/all of this:

1. this was sent at around ~2am in my timezone, when the comic in question was released only like 2 hours earlier. which to me feels… a tad early to start talking in my (or anyone’s) inbox about it without any sort of spoiler/context warning before talking about the issue’s content. especially if i have not already posted about the issue myself, indicating i’ve read it. i know you did not say anything terribly specific here, but like… still. i personally prefer going into new issues completely blind aside from officially released promo stuff (aka im good with seeing solicits and the previews from dc and stuff the artists/writers may post/talk about ahead of time) so getting any other info ahead (even vague stuff) really frustrates me as a general thing. (I know that may seem hypocritical because there are times i’ve discussed/referenced leaks, but trust me when i say i don’t seek them out. sometimes they are thrust upon me because people don’t tag that shit properly, and i still have opinions all the time always, but i make a point of spoiler tagging in those scenarios).

2. in general, the concept of a comic ship (especially one with teen/young adult characters) being ‘endgame’ is just so wildly absurd to me. like without reading the issue i’d guess you’re using the phrase in a more colloquial ‘this ship is going to stick around longterm!’ way, and sure totally i’d believe that sort of thing got indicated, and that’s cool and exciting if it was! but monthly superhero comics are an ongoing medium… i guess i’m getting into semantics here but there can’t really be endgame ships if the ‘game’ never ‘ends’. even an individual book getting cancelled isn’t an actual end when it’s part of a shared universe thus the same characters can pop up elsewhere. and even if its like ‘ahhh look! the future!’ that sort of thing happens in comics every other week and can change so so easily.

3. i have not actually been keeping up to date with Tim’s current solo to begin with. i know that may seem shocking because of the [gestures vaguely to my icon and my blog in general] but it’s because unfortunately the universe had really cruel timing the day TD:R #1 released and due to that i’m still in ‘every new issue coming out just makes me think about how many months it’s been since my uncle died’ mode. so ive been avoiding the book and avoiding discussion about it for the sake of my own mental health right now. someday i’ll get around to it but idk when i’m gonna have enough… distance, I guess, to be able to.

anyways. sorry that that is probably super not the sort of response you were wanting/expecting, pls don’t think im Mad at you individual anon who sent this and i’m glad you’re excited about whatever happened in the book! this just… struck me and my brain at the wrong moment in the wrong ways, i suppose

[rachdam]

hot take but main tags are for everyone whether u like the content or not. look im really sorry that you saw content that triggered you, thats awful. in this case though u can send a polite ask or comment directly under the post asking the person to add tags such as #tw sa and #tw grooming and then block said tags. if the person refuses (which is an asshole move lol not everyone wants to see this kind of content thats facts,) u can directly block the person and thus never see their content again. but yea agree that not adding tw tags sucks

To be honest I'll say you're right and you should be able to use the main tags. That was more a silly, upset statement on my part because of how I was feeling at the time rather than thinking of it logically.

As for trying to talk or ask for tags/warnings, unfortunately not everyone wants to do that. And I've blocked literal hundreds of people to try and avoid seeing those sorts of posts. I actually blocked that person and all of their hundreds of followers just so I can try and avoid that community on twt.

It's just frustrating to see people time and time and time again not tag their stuff. I have every variation of proship/dead dove/etc. blocked that I could find. I know I said it in a post before this, but I have gone many months without seeing anything proship. All it takes is a few people not tagging their stuff properly to mess that up. I feel it's especially bad on twt because of the word count limit where ppl don't wanna add that extra "hey this is proship! Don't read!" bc it'll take up space. At least most ppl on Tumblr will add something like that, which I certainly respect more.

Idk I just wish people would be more considerate I guess. I think this turned more into a ramble so forgive me for that but yeah.

[ladydimitrescuspet]

A Living Hell

ao3 link! a little bit of angst for you beautiful souls! I must admit that I hurt my feelings writing this so I ask that you send alcina some love and all the positivity that you can! as always sorry for any grammatical errors, please enjoy, and let me know your thoughts if you want to share them!

warning: no happy ending, sorry!

Tag List (only fill out the form once please): @lord-dimitrescu, @alwaysgoodnight, @paint-it-periwinkle, @lightspica, @ultimatebottom69, @sexyheisenbeast, @crazy-obsessed, @squid3, @inlovewithalcinadimitrescu, @the-obscurity, @sapphicalciee, @ladydimitresculove, @solemnnova, @itsyourgirlmalise, @the-little-shadow, @marvelwomen-simp, @rachelthefanfictionwriter, @d14n4ol, @peachesandlesbians, @celina1221, ｜Anna, @Gansito83, @Followingmyheartledmetoyou, @theuslesslezbian (won’t tag, idk why)

-----

“Mother, I think Y/N’s broken. They’re afraid of me, they’ve never been afraid of me.” Daniela said to her mother.

Alcina motioned for her daughter to come over to her, patting her lap. When Daniela was on her lap, her head rested against her mother. “Y/N’s...” Alcina trailed off, gathering her words together properly. “I know Y/N acts a little different around us nowadays, but.... because of that wretched man-thing and what he did, their memories of us have disappeared, for lack of a better word.” Alcina explained.

“Disappeared? Will they come back?” Daniela asked with a small frown.

Alcina pressed a kiss to Daniela’s forehead. “It’s complicated, darling. With Y/N’s amnesia, there’s no telling if they’ll retain their memories ever again. Donna’s doing all she can to monitor their progress.”

“But?” Daniela questioned.

Alcina sighed. “But it’s not looking hopeful.” Alcina replied. Daniela sniffled, her eyes watering. “Nonetheless, my sweet girl, we’ll do all we can to create new memories with them. We must, however, gain their trust again. Where are your sisters?”

“In Y/N’s room.” Daniela replied quietly.

“That’s no good. If Y/N’s scared of you then there’s no doubt that they’re scared of them as well. Up now, Dani.” Alcina said.

Daniela pouted. “Carry me, momma?” Daniela asked, giving her mother her best puppy dog eyes.

Alcina sighed again, a small smile forming on her face. “Fine, fine. Come now, let us go tend to our guest.” Alcina said as she stood from her chair, her daughter in her arms.

As they walked the halls toward your room, Daniela asked her mother some questions. “What if Y/N doesn’t want to create new memories with us? What if they never love us the same way they used to?”

“It will take time, Daniela, but we will do what we can. Unfortunately, we cannot force them to want more with us just because of how things used to be. They have to want those things on their own, do you understand?” Daniela nodded her head. “Good, good. Down you go, dear.” Alcina said as she placed Daniela on the floor before knocking on the door in front of them.

Cassandra opened the door. “Hello, Mother.” Cassandra said. “Y/N’s locked themselves in the bathroom and they won’t come out. They keep screaming that we’re murderers and they want to go home.” Tears welled in Cassandra’s eyes.

“Oh, my darling, I’m sorry. I’ll explain once I calm them down.” Alcina replied, her hand coming up to run her hand over Cassandra’s hair before cupping her cheek. “Like I told Daniela, it’ll take some time, but we will help them readjust to life in the castle.”

Cassandra nodded her head. “Of course, Mother.”

“Mother, has Cassandra told you about Y/N? They’ve been acting very strange since they woke up.” Bela said as she entered the room, a plate in her hand. “I thought it would be nice for them to eat.”

Alcina smiled at her daughter. “That’s very kind of you, Bela. Leave the plate on the vanity, I’ll make sure they eat.” Alcina said. “Why don’t you girls go entertain yourselves before washing up for dinner while I talk to them.” The girls nodded their heads before exiting the room.

Alcina knocked on the bathroom door. “Go away. Leave me alone.” You responded, the door muffling your voice.

“Darling, I’m afraid I can’t do that.” Alcina replied. “Why don’t you come out here and have something to eat? I sent my daughters away, but Bela brought you some food.”

“I’m not hungry. Can you please just leave me alone?” You asked.

Alcina sighed. “I’m afraid I can do that, dragoste.” Alcina let out a small grunt as she positioned herself to sit up against the wall by the bathroom door. “How about this? If you talk to me about what’s wrong, I’ll give you your space, okay?” Alcina suggested.

You mulled the offer over for a moment before ultimately agreeing to it. You slowly opened the door, a bit shocked to see the Lady on the floor. You sat across from her, your back against the bed. You put as much distance between the two of you as you could.

You bit your lip and sighed. “I don’t want to be here. I want to go home.” You said.

“But darling, you are home. Castle Dimitrescu is your home. Has been for a few decades.” Alcina replied.

You shook your head. “No. No. This is not my home. My house is in the village with my family. I don’t belong here. I don’t want to belong here.” You looked up at her with tears in your eyes. “I just want to go home. Please let me go home.”

You could see the pain in Alcina’s eyes as you pleaded with her. “I’m afraid with the most recent events that have happened, your home is no longer intact. And darling, your family…” Alcina trailed off.

You shook your head. “No, you’re lying. Stop lying to me. Take me home. Now.” You demanding as you stood up and walked over to her. “Take. Me. Home.”

Alcina sighed before rising to her full height. “As you wish, draga mea.” Alcina replied. “But you will not be permitted to stay on the premises, it isn’t safe to do so as it once was.” You frowned at her words, but you knew she was probably right.

It wasn’t until the next that you and the Lady of the Castle travelled down to the village. The shops were all boarded up, the homes were more rundown than the last time you’d been down there. Despite that, you could see the villagers working on their homes to fix them from the event that happened that the Lady had mentioned.

“What… what happened?” You asked as the two of you walked down the road. You thought you might have needed to give her directions, but she seemed to know where she was going. She looked down at you with a raised eyebrow, confusing etching her facial features a bit. “You mentioned some kind of event or events that happened.”

“Ah.” Alcina grimaced slightly as she thought about. “I guess you could call it an invasion. A one man invasion.” Alcina replied. She cleared her throat before continuing. “You see, Mother Miranda is… in need of something. She, well, she found the perfect thing to help her out so she took it. And we, unfortunately, suffered the consequences of her actions. You were injured during the events protecting ou- my daughters from him. He attacked you from behind with some object, hitting your head thus causing you to fall unconscious. A very heartbreaking moment, dear. And then you were in a coma and my dearest sister, Donna, has taken to monitoring your progress during your amnesia.” Alcina explained.

You frowned. “Amnesia?” Alcina hummed. You shook your head. “No. I can’t, that can’t be. I don’t… I don’t remember ever being at the Castle. Ever.” You stared ahead as you came up to the ruins of what used to be your home.

“And what do you remember?” Alcina asked, putting her hand on your shoulder.

You flinched, moving away from her. “Don’t touch me.” You snapped. “As for your question, I remember saying good night to my family and then going to sleep. Then when I woke up, I was at the Castle, in your…” You trailed off as you tried putting the pieces together. “Your eyes widened in horror. “You. You did this. You caused this.”

“Darling, wha-“

You cut her off. “Don’t act innocent. You killed my family, destroyed my home, and kidnapped me. Making up some story about some man invading the village as the perfect cover.” You glared at her. “Did you think I wouldn’t figure it out? That I would just believe your lies?” You could see the pain and hurt in Alcina’s eyes. You moved away from her when she reached her hand out to you again. “I said don’t fucking touch me!” You hissed.

“I’m sorry.” Alcina said softly. “But I didn’t do this. You… you came to the Castle to work. To provide for your family.” Alcina let a small smile grace her face as her eyes teared up a bit. “You were quite clumsy when you started out. The girls didn’t think we should keep you on after your first week, but I… I saw something in you. I made you my personal hand servant after that week. You were terrified. I remember how scared you looked when you found yourself in a room with me, alone. I can’t count how many times I had to reassure you that you were safe with me, for weeks on end. It did take a while for you to warm up to me, but after that you were very confident in your role. We got close, you got close to the girls too. Then one thing led to another. We married. And then that man-thing destroyed the peaceful and loving family I had by taking you away from us.” Alcina sniffled, a few tears falling down her cheeks.

A part of you believed her story, feeling a little tingle within yourself as she told it. But you knew it wasn’t true. “You’re very good.” You replied. Alcina stared at you, purely confused by your words. “At lying. At weaving words together to make them sound believable. You almost had me, almost made me believe that that’s what really happened.” Alcina opened her mouth to say something, but you shook your head. “Don’t bother. You want to know something?”

“Know what?” Her tone sounded a bit lost, you could tell she was beyond hurt by your words.

“That you’re a monster.” You replied. That broke her heart, you could tell the moment you said it, watching her expression crack when you called her a monster. “You take young girls from their homes, kill the men and eat them if they even breathe in your direction. Murdering those girls to use their blood for your so called wine. And call it a form of living, a way for you to survive. You’re a murderer. You’re a monster. But you see yourself as a God, like what you’re doing is okay. It’s not, it’s disgusting. You disgust me. Your daughters disgust me.”

“Y/N, please. You don’t… you don’t mean that. You don’t mean it.” Alcina pleaded slightly as she tried to reach out to you again.

You pushed her hand away, forcefully. “I said don’t fucking touch me. Do not fucking touch me.” You were breathing heavily. You shook your head. “I have to leave. I need to get out of here. You’re monsters, all of you. Every single last one you.” You started walking backwards, away from Alcina. Away from the village. “I'd say I hope you all rot in hell, especially you, but you're already living in it.” You said, spitting at the ground before turning around.

Alcina fiddled with your engagement ring and wedding ring as she watched you walk away from her, tears flowing down her face. She was going to give them back to you when the two of you got back from the village. After she told you what happened. She hadn’t expected you to react that way, didn’t consider this scenario.

Alcina didn’t come after you, she knew she’d already lost you. Twice now. No sense in trying to force you into something you didn’t want. Maybe you always felt this way and the attack was your guiding light, the one you needed to clear your mind and realise just how horrible of a person she was. The girls crowded their Mother as she came home, questioning your whereabouts when they didn't see you.

“Y/N will no longer be residing with us, girls.” Alcina replied. “You may send some maids to clean up the guest room and then you may go play. But I ask that you refrain from ever mentioning Y/N, wipe the Castle of their presence. Get rid of it all.” Alcina requested. “They are as dead to us as we are to them and it will stay that way forever.”

“But Mother…” Daniela started, but quickly found herself closing her mouth at her Mother’s intense stare. “Yes, Mother.” Daniela said dejectedly. Her sisters following her lead before dispersing into their swarms.

Alcina sighed as she made her way to her chambers, placing your rings in the box she’d gotten them in. “Good bye, iubirea mea.” Alcina said softly as she closed the box and placed it on her vanity. The only things she wished to remember you by, allowing only a small part of you to reside in her home and her heart.

[morganaseren]

OC Introduction

Tagged by: @illusivesoul Thanks! Sorry this took so long!

Tagging: @this-is-something-idk-what, @noeldressari, @alessandramortt, @theherowarden, @jellydishes​ As per usual, I can never figure out who has or hasn’t been tagged by this. No pressure if you don’t want to participate though! Below is the template you can use.

My answers will be under the Read More.

---

Fandom:

Role:

BASICS

Full Name:

Nickname(s):

Pronouns:

Sexuality:

Occupation and Titles:

Birthday & Age:

Physical description:

Clothing style:

BACKGROUND

COMBAT & SKILLS

Preferred fighting style:

Special skills:

RELATIONSHIPS

Family:

Love interest:

Best friends:

PERSONALITY

Positive traits:

Negative traits:

Likes:

Dislikes:

Fears:

Guilty Pleasure:

Hobbies:

Fandom: Dragon Age

Role: Inquisitor

BASICS

Full Name: Niamh (pronounced “Neev”) Cousland

Nickname(s): Neevy (from Sera), Brat (from Leliana lolol), Storm Pup (mostly from her late mother’s side of the family)

Pronouns: She/Her

Sexuality: Lesbian

Occupation and Titles: Niamh is the leader of the Inquisition forces and is also hailed as the Herald of Andraste. Although all her rights to the Cousland estate along with any titles associated with it were forfeited the moment her magic manifested, her ties to her family name are still recognized and vice versa--perhaps especially so now with her being Inquisitor. Thus, in accordance to an older tradition from her late mother’s family, she is also titled the Storm Wolf of Highever per her brother Teyrn Fergus Cousland.

Birthday & Age: Niamh was born on the 3rd of Cloudreach in 9:08 Dragon, so she’s 33 as of Inquisition and 36 as of the Trespasser DLC.

Physical description: She’s a woman of middling height (5′6″ or 168cm). Niamh’s hair is pitch-black, which settles asymmetrically around her face with a longer fringe covering one of her eyes--a pale, misty-grey hue. Physique-wise, she’s full of wiry muscle, especially along her arms, shoulders, and back--testament to years of heavy staffwork.

Clothing style: This is more dependent on what setting she finds herself in. Around Skyhold or in more official circumstances, she tends to garb herself in formal wear such as the one seen below.

When she’s out and about on missions, her attire consists more of cloth and leather as depicted in the screenshot above. As a native Fereldan, she has a tendency to favor fur in her overall field outfit, which is evident in the black Great Bear fur seen along the spaulders atop her shoulders. Then, as an occasional artist, her sketchbook is ever present, constantly hanging from her belt as she draws flora, fauna, and anything of interest in her travels to properly document later. Littered amongst the sketches are also occasional plans for whatever project she’d like to work on back at Skyhold.

Art and crafting is ever her way of relaxing.

Despite being an artist, her color palette in terms of clothing remains relatively simple even if the cut of them are always finely-tailored. She favors darker colors overall with white and varying shades of grey. Occasionally, a splash of color is thrown in every now and again for visual emphasis.

For instance, the red scarf you see on her is a gift from Bethany Hawke. ;3

BACKGROUND

Niamh is the youngest child of Bryce and Eleanor Cousland.

She was born beneath a violent storm that only settled as her newborn cries filled the world--a telltale sign perhaps of the destiny that would later be laid out before her.

She was taken away to Ferelden’s Circle when her magic manifested at the age of four. Niamh was the youngest to enter Kinloch Hold that year, and she was inconsolable for several months as she struggled to adapt to her new surroundings and the many strangers that were meant to be her new family of sorts.

Of all the mages present, she was closest to Jowan since he was only a year or two older than her, and the then young boy was responsible for drawing her out of her sullen shell--enough to where she could finally be comfortable with interacting with others after months of frightened silence. The two children did everything together and were otherwise inseparable. Unfortunately, their relationship would later become strained as they entered into adolescence, especially as Niamh grew into her magical abilities and surpassed him entirely in power, astounding the likes of First Enchanter Irving and Wynne--both whom became her respective mentors--with her command over the elements. 

Niamh was able to successfully undertake the Harrowing at the age of seventeen, earning the right to be recognized as a full-fledged mage. She was never designated an Enchanter throughout her time in the Circle, for she had no personal apprentices of her own. The few new ones to arrive at the Tower were assigned to those who had passed the Harrowing before her, but she was content to help them and the Senior Enchanters however she could. Her kindness, patience, and calm diligence earned her easy friendships.

...or at least she thought so until some of her colleagues turned on her with Uldred’s coup following the onset of the Blight.

Caught between blood mages and Templars who believed she had a hand in Uldred’s machinations, she likely would have succumbed to either party eventually had her sister Saoirse--now a Grey Warden--not arrived to help cleanse the Tower of abominations and save First Enchanter Irving and the remaining Senior Enchanters.

For her efforts in saving them, Niamh was allowed to accompany her sister on her travels across Ferelden along with Wynne. She formed a fast friendship with Leliana early on, and it eventually led to heavy infatuation on Niamh’s end, but it stuttered to an abrupt halt when she realized her sister was also in love with the bard. Believing that she had nothing of worth to offer to Leliana as a mere mage, Niamh buried her feelings for the other woman, watching from afar as she fell for Saoirse.

Saoirse was as bold as all great heroes could ever hope to be, and so she was well-suited for Leliana, but it was Niamh who tempered much of her sister’s impulsiveness, especially when it came to matters of diplomacy.

---

"Can't we just--"

"No." Niamh just kept her gaze forward as they walked out of the Deep Roads, refusing to look at her sister.

"But it's a good idea!" Saoirse insisted earnestly.

"Saoirse, in no world where you throw the crown at the two candidates for Orzammar's throne and expect the least most concussed to be King can ever be considered a 'good idea,'" Niamh deadpanned.

---

Yet, for all her brilliance with tactics and matters of negotiation, Niamh was unable to convince Saoirse to allow Morrigan to use her Dark Ritual despite knowing it would have saved any of the Grey Wardens from being sacrificed. Worse, her sister made her promise not to tell Leliana of Saoirse’s own plans to slay the Archdemon in the final battle.

As expected, it resulted in Saoirse’s death.

Racked with guilt over never telling Leliana the truth of the matter, and believing she had been left the last of the Couslands--a mage that Thedas would have never recognized--she disappeared following the end of the Fifth Blight. Niamh placed herself in a self-imposed exile abroad for over a decade until news of a Conclave by Divine Justinia was brought to her attention. The Divine had hoped to bring together both sides of the Mage-Templar War and negotiate its end.

For Niamh, this led her to return to Ferelden. It was her last hope to see if the world could finally begin to change for the better.

Instead, she was given a far different destiny...

COMBAT & SKILLS

Preferred fighting style: She prefers keeping herself at range on the battlefield, for it allows her to better survey it. She sees everything like an intricate chess game, and she always tries to place herself and her team at the best advantage to overcome their opponents.

As a mage, Niamh incorporates a lot of staffwork in her fighting, especially when it comes to casting magic. However, when she was living abroad, she had to learn to adjust her fighting style altogether so that she would never be suspected of being a mage. As such, she taught herself to fight with spears and polearms, as they were still similar enough to normal staff-fighting that it wouldn’t require a completely new foundation with which to work from.

Because the new style of fighting required her to be within relatively close quarters of her enemies, she learned to try and limit the time of the engagement with them as much as possible with quick, brutal strikes. That methodology happens regardless of how many opponents there are. A quick takedown means a much quicker escape after all. As a runaway apostate, she couldn’t risk leaving a trail of bodies behind her wherever she went.

Special skills: Niamh is specialized in all the elemental houses of magic although she favors lightning the most. During her time with the Inquisition, she also specialized in necromancy--much to the surprise of many.

RELATIONSHIPS

Family: Of the renowned Couslands, only she and her older brother Fergus remain, but despite their years apart(she honestly didn’t know that he survived the Battle of Ostagar until she returned to Ferelden in 9:41), they remain loving and supportive as always toward one another. Of her late mother’s family, the Mac Eanraigs, she gets along well with them, especially her Aunt Eithne (who will be making her first official appearance in chapter 24 of OtSttCA).

Love interest: Leliana (although they won’t be an official couple until close to chapter 30 or so)

Best friends: Dorian, Sera, and Cole. She views the three of them like younger siblings, which was an admittedly odd feeling for her at first, given that she’s the youngest of her own siblings.

Of her other companions, she is also closest to Vivienne although Niamh sees her more like a fond, maternal figure than a best friend. She greatly respects how the older woman was able to take her status as a mage and turn it into a position of power within the Orlesian Imperial Court, especially when so very little of it was ever afforded to their people. When it comes to the mage allies she gathered from Redcliffe, she trusts Vivienne’s judgment in overseeing them along with the Knight-Enchanters Niamh requested of her back in chapter 13, especially since Niamh travels so much between missions. Then, when it comes to just about anything regarding Orlais, she goes to Vivienne as much as Leliana or Josephine, mostly wanting the insight of a mage in regards to the culture and politics seen there.

Then, of her War Council, Leliana and Josephine are her absolute favorites. Niamh and Leliana have so much history between them that it’s impossible to separate themselves from one another, and she appreciates Josephine’s sweet nature as well as her diplomatic acumen.

PERSONALITY

Positive traits: Her adaptability. There’s an almost... chameleon-like nature to Niamh at times. As such, she can acclimate herself to whatever her environment asks of her and find a way to thrive in spite of it all. She’s also quite intelligent. Ever the eternal student, she constantly looks to expand her wealth of knowledge. Had she not been born a mage, she likely would have done well as a scholar in the world of Thedas. Niamh is also benevolent, always seeking to place more kindness into the world rather than contributing to the bad already within it.

Negative traits: After years of being taught rather toxic, religious doctrine from the Chantry in regards to mages, Niamh has rather low self-esteem, especially when it comes to the subject of love. She doesn’t believe herself worthy of Leliana for instance. As brilliant as she is, her mind can be rather restless at times. This can lead to overthinking outside of any tactical or official setting, which tends to feed back on her latent anxiety as a leader. Then, having spent a decade constantly on the move, she’s not used to staying still for long periods of time, which lends itself to some trouble, especially if she’s injured. She is quite literally the worst patient ever. :P

Likes: Storms, the ocean, mabari, tea, strategy games, sweets, books, art

Dislikes: The Chantry, Templars, discriminatory behavior, incivility,

Fears: The Rite of Tranquility, outright failure as a leader

Guilty Pleasure: Niamh has the most terrible sweet tooth. If given half the chance, she’d get her entire day’s sustenance through sweets alone. She actually does like fashion; she just couldn’t allow herself to indulge in it since her nomadic lifestyle before joining the Inquisition didn’t permit such luxury. She’d happily window-shop the entire day away if given the opportunity.

Hobbies: Sketching, painting, crafting, reading, chess

[lvmosity]

my only valentine | draco malfoy [2]

pairing: draco malfoy x slytherin!reader

genre: fluff bc it’s a valentines day special ooh la la

summary: you and draco have been enemies since the start of hogwarts despite being in the same houses, but everyone knows you two secretly like each other. valentines day has arrived and you hope to receive a love confession from one boy only; your arch-enemy nevertheless. however, a minor incident occurs caused by draco and hurts you deeply. will your valentines day be rescued?

word count: 3.7k

warnings: minor swearing ?? sorry i swear a lot

a/n: final part is here! received a lot of love on my first one and that made me really happy! thank u all eeek <3 couldn’t hesitate to finish this off because i didn’t want to make u wait a long time so here it is! enjoy :-) also idk if there are errors in here even tho i proofread multiple times, so let me know if u see any !!

tags: @aus-pi-cially​ @biinspiration​ @iwritetrashimagines​ @juliemoney45​ @a-hoe-for-vanya​ @slytherclawmalfoy​ 

read part one → here 

After the incident, you stayed in your dorm for the rest of the day. Professor McGonagall excused you out of classes, each visiting the Professors that you had a class with today to report that you wouldn’t be attending due to you falling ‘ill’. You mentally thanked her for that and you reminded yourself to thank her properly the next morning since you were too upset and embarrassed to walk out.

You knew that at this very moment that everyone was talking about you, you were once again the main gossiping topic. When some students had asked your classmates who were present at the incident, they simply explained the situation and one by one the information had quickly spread like wildfire. 

Many girls felt bad for you, some of the girls from your house even visited you during their frees and empathised with you. After stating that you were feeling alright, they started to bad-mouth Draco by calling him all sorts and making fun of him. You’d never thought you’d hear your own housemates mockingly make fun of Draco but it was a blessing to your ears. Although, you wished for their safety as you knew his father will hear about it and order expulsion upon them.

And by most girls, you mean everyone except a few girls such as Pansy Parkinson enjoyed you feeling dejected. You weren’t the only girl who liked him of course. Since Year One, Pansy has made sure to everyone that she likes loves Draco. You could visualise the look on her face when she heard about the situation, and she probably looked the happiest she’s ever been.

Pansy also made it clear that she hates you. At first, you both didn’t have a problem with each other since you were Slytherin housemates, however, you couldn’t hold back your slight annoyance with her once she showed attitude. But at the start of Year 4, she turned hostile towards you. Apparently, she sees you as a threat and you’d soon ruin her ‘plans’, whatever they were.

Your friends came by during dinner to give the gifts you left in class since you ran out without grabbing them. They each gave you a consoling hug, several uplifting words to cheer you up as well as desserts from the meal they were serving as a Valentines Day special. It did manage to bring your mood up which was a good thing as you were able to focus on something else.

However, the second you lay eyes on the gifts that laid on your bedside counter, you’d instantly be reminded about the incident turning your mood sour. You couldn’t help but tear up which escalates into a crying session. You’ve possibly had around five sessions since then and now it’s six because you just looked at it again.

It really hurt you. His words struck thorns in your heart, he really didn’t have feelings for you at all. You cursed at yourself for thinking he’d have a slight interest in you all this time but now you realised you were wrong; he has always hated you. He despised you. From the very start lasting to the very end.

What does this mean to you from now on? Obviously, it means your crush on Draco should be completely destroyed. No, it needs to be. You’d be a fool to continue liking Draco after that, he literally declared his hatred for you and he had an audience to hear it loud and clear. He’ll never see you anything more than an enemy. He only saw you as a despicable, loathsome, grotesque looking, ugly--

“Ugh, I’m such an idiot!” you cried out with despair and flipped the bed covers over your head.

You forced your eyes shut and tried to shut any thoughts of Draco but images of him kept coming back. It was hopeless. You were never going to get over him.

Time goes by and you watched the sky turn from grey to black indicating that it was night-time. It was time for everyone to head back to their dorms since classes had finished for the day. One by one you watch your roommates, as well as your friends, stumble into the room and hop into bed falling fast asleep minutes later.

You lie in bed, tossing back and forth multiple times unable to get in a comfortable position. It had been a while since everyone had fallen asleep, snores filled the room as well as the ticking of the clock. You concluded that you weren’t going to fall asleep any time soon as you weren’t tired despite feeling the heaviness on your eyelids.

Taking a quick glance at the clock, you saw that it was only beginning to hit 11PM. Sighing, you step out of bed, slipping your slippers on as you walk outside. You knew no one would be awake at this time judging by how late it was thus spending a bit of time sitting in front of the fireplace in the Slytherin Common Room would be a good way to fall asleep quicker and clear your thoughts.

You step into the Common Room and just as you thought; not one person was awake. The fireplace was still lit and burning strongly along with the violent crackling of the fire. The lamps had been switched off leaving the fireplace and the light from the windows to be the only source of light. It was awfully eerie without anyone else in the room but it didn’t bother you as much because you were used to it, it was located in the dungeons of course.

As you made your way downstairs, you were starting to feel the heat radiating from the fire inch by inch. You shuddered at the warmth wafting your face once you stood in front of the fireplace. Sitting yourself down on the carpet, you cross your legs and lifted your hands up to warm them up.

You give a long sigh, relaxing your shoulders and the muscles in your body. For a couple of minutes, you had stayed like this, welcoming the warmth that surrounded you and you felt at peace. You were able to clear your thoughts out to the point you felt like you had moved on from that horrific incident.

“Oh, you’re still up.”

You quickly look behind to see Draco leaning over the balcony, gazing at you. How long has he been standing there for? Why was he still wide awake at this time? More importantly, what the hell do you do now?

Your eyes widen out of shock, instantly turning back and stare at the fireplace and start to fidget with your hands. You could hear him walk down the steps, your heart is starting to beat fast. His footsteps are coming closer. Your mind was racing as you frantically look around. Should you try and run away so you wouldn’t have to face him? Do you stay sitting down and wait for him? Maybe If you thought of a good excuse, you can walk back to the dorm without any awkwardness. Or you can just run away right now and he wouldn’t even have the chance to say something--

Draco clears his throat as he calmly sits himself down next to you. Legs crossed, he also warms his hands up neither saying a word or glancing at you.

You didn’t want to peek at him but you could tell out of the corner of your eye that he doesn’t seem to have a scowl or an irritated look despite being next to you. Instead, he supports a blank face. It was difficult to guess how he’s feeling right now. 

Focusing back on the fireplace, you both sit there in silence, both not having the confidence to speak a single word. It stays like that for a while, listening to the crackling of the fire, hearing his and your quiet breathing, your heartbeat gradually ringing loud in your ears. You were starting to feel uncomfortable with the awkward atmosphere. You weren’t sure if Draco was feeling the same, you were too nervous to check his face.

“Can’t sleep?”

Draco breaks the silence. Finally encouraging yourself to look at him, you wait for him to turn to you and wait for your reply but he doesn’t. His eyes still fixated on the fire in front. You sigh internally. 

“Y-yeah...” Your words wavering at the end. You slowly uncross your legs before bending and pressing them against your chest. You cross your arms and place them on top of your knees, propping your chin on top afterwards.

Great. Draco now knows you’re basically shitting your pants right now. That made you even more nervous. He’s probably making fun of you right now in his head.

“Just wanted to clear my mind and it’s working out fairly good.” You try to laugh your nervousness off in hopes that Draco would ignore your slight tremor from before.

"Your brain must feel as good as new,” Draco said causing you to look at him again, “seeing that you’ve never used it in your whole life.”

You frown at him before rolling your eyes.

“You know, I’ve been trying to see things from your point of view but I can’t get my head that far up my arse.”

You snap back at Draco, waiting for him to give you his iconic nasty look and throw an insult back but to your surprise, he doesn’t. Draco sits there in silence again, he still hasn’t bothered trying to look at you. You were starting to debate whether he was only here to argue or have a normal chat for once or maybe even apologise.

But this was Draco Malfoy you were talking about. He would never in a million years apologise to someone unless they were his father or that he really meant it or if he knew he was in the wrong.

Maybe you should just go and leave him alone, you really weren’t in the mood to argue with him as well as be in the same room as him. Especially after what he said. This will possibly be the last time you exchange words with him, you figured it would be best to stray clear of Draco, ignoring any snide comments he makes and pretend he didn’t exist. It’ll be tough alright but you knew you had to do it.

You sigh once more and stand up, giving Draco one last look. “If you’re only here to tease me then It’s useless to even share the same air with you right now,” He’s still not turning to face you. You didn’t know why you continued standing there as if you’re expecting anything to happen. “so goodbye Malfoy. Nice knowing you by the way.”

You turn on your heels and swiftly walk away, each stepping closer to the stairs. You didn’t dare try to look back, it would only hold you back thus you kept your eyes in front.

“I’m sorry.”

You froze, standing in your spot motionless. Did he just apologise? There’s no way you heard that correctly, no, it’s your mind playing tricks on you convincing you to turn around and accompany him. Just keep walking, Draco didn’t say it.

“I’m sorry.” Apologising again.

You slowly turn around and see that Draco had finally faced you, his eyes bore into yours. Your mouth slightly gaped open as if to speak but no sound could be made. You felt weak under the stares of Draco, you could feel your legs starting to wobble.

“I, uh, didn’t mean what I said before... y’know... me calling you ugly,” Draco bites his bottom lips feeling slightly embarrassed now that he’s facing you. Bowing his head, he continues rambling on, “I didn’t mean to hurt you. It was a mistake, it came out so suddenly--”

“Thank you Draco.”

Draco’s head shoots up, his eyes wide open. He had heard his name come out of your mouth, and it was his first name instead of the usual ‘Malfoy’.

“What?”

“I said thank you Draco.”

A blush crept along his cheeks as he quickly turns his head to the side in an attempt to conceal it. However, he knew it failed as you give a quiet giggle. You found it amusing to see Draco react in a way after hearing his name being said, especially since it was from you.

“For what?”

“You finally apologised to me... and you actually meant it this time without being sarcastic.”

Draco smiles sheepishly, scratching the side of his head with his head still turned away. He couldn’t meet the eyes of yours, he felt too ashamed at the fact that he couldn’t get the blush on his face to fade anytime soon. He gives a short nod as if to acknowledge your thanks causing you to smile in return.

Once again, the silence returns as both of you stand in front of each other, you looking down at your feet fidgeting whilst Draco did the same. Your throat started to dry up as you were too nervous to swallow, the atmosphere became awfully awkward.

“I don’t think you’re ugly by the way,” Draco suddenly said, “you’re the opposite actually.”

Raising your eyebrows, you question him, “Like what? I’m somewhat decent is what you’re trying to say.”

Draco immediately shakes his head.

“Then what?” You were starting to become impatient.

“You’re just not ugly okay? I can’t explain it.”

“Oh so I’m like above ugly but below average looking, maybe those are the words you’re looking for--”

“For Merlin’s sake, you’re pretty goddamn it!”

You instantly shut up, looking at him directly with your mouth slightly gaped open. Draco gives out a long sigh, calming himself down. He had almost shouted it out loud to wake anyone up.

“You’re not ugly, you’re pretty,” Draco said with a much quieter, soft tone. “Really fucking pretty. You were never ugly in my eyes, from the moment I met you up until now, I still find you pretty.”

He steps closer to you, closing in the gap between the both of you before stopping to have only a few metres left. He was practically an arm's length away, close enough for him to hear your heart beating frantically, as well as the heat radiating from you. Draco noticed how you were blushing like mad, after all, this was the closest you guys have ever been.

“I like you Y/N.”

And in the blink of an eye, he steps in further and grabs your chin to lift it upwards before he kisses you. Impulsively, you kiss back as you close your eyes, your lips moving in sync with his. His lips were slightly chapped but it had softened in time as it felt incredibly plumpy against your very own.

His hands gently move to the side of your face, his thumb lightly brushing your cheek. You squirm under his touch but your lips were still laced together, you swore you felt Draco subtly bite your bottom lip indicating that he was enjoying this. And so did you.

After what seemed like forever, Draco pulls apart and drops his hand. Still blushing furiously, you delicately touch your lips. Did you guys really just kiss?

Draco steps back and chuckles, “Sorry, couldn’t help myself.” 

“I like you too.” You randomly blurt out causing Draco to laugh again.

“I know.”

“You knew?”

“I’m not an idiot. You made it quite obvious with your stares and flirting that it wasn’t hard to notice Y/N.” He rolls his eyes.

“Ah...” You said, tucking a bit of your hair behind your ear. “Whoops.”

You open your mouth to speak again. “I feel sorry for the guy who gave me those Valentines gifts.” Draco listens to you curiously, “I can’t imagine the look on his face when he finds out his crush has been kissed by another guy.”

He stares at you in disbelief. “Are you daft?”

“What?” You said, confused.

“I sent you those.” 

“As if. The Draco Malfoy sent me Valentines gifts?” You try to suppress your laughter since you found it amusing. 

Draco shoots you an offended look, “Yeah well, it’s not like I wanted to in the first place. Mother insisted that I man up and woo a girl so I don’t live my life as an old man that’s on the verge of dying as a loner.”

“Whatever you say Malfoy.” Giggling at his poor excuse.

He tuts before he leans back on the couch, crossing his arms, he lifts his head to look at you. He tilts his head to the side and smirks causing you to raise your eyebrows.

“So, does this mean we’re a thing now?”

“No.”

“What? But I just made out with you.”

You turn red at his statement. “You don’t just automatically assume a couple gets together after kissing.” You explained. 

“Then do I have to do something more other than a kiss?” He winks suggestively. You scrunch your face in disgust.

“No, you dimwit, you have to ask them out first in the traditional way.”

Draco lets out an ‘ahh’ and nods slowly. He uncrosses his arms and stands up, still leaning on the couch. “Then will you be my girlfriend?”

You let out a disappointed whine, “Seriously Malfoy, I can’t tell if you’re doing this to be funny or what--”

“No,” Draco stands up and walks closer to you, his hand lifts to grasps yours, taking you by surprise. “I’m serious. I’d like to be your boyfriend Y/N.”

He softly brushes his thumb up and down your fingers, waiting patiently for your answer. He locks eyes with you making your heart flutter. Your mouth kept opening and closing, unable to get a word out. You didn’t know how to respond to his bold question. 

It had only been an hour since you had concluded it was best to discard your crush on Draco and move on with your life. It had only been a few hours since you and several other Slytherin girls were having the time of your lives, badmouthing him. It had been hours since Draco had completely crushed your heart with his hurtful comments. These were enough reasons for you to reject Draco on the spot.

But not enough for it to convince your heart otherwise. No, your heart was telling you to forgive Draco and accept him.

You finally pull out of your thoughts and look at him. Draco looks at you with anticipation and starts overthinking. He wishes that you would answer him anytime now otherwise, he’ll feel humiliated knowing he got rejected. But that quickly disappears when he sees you give a small smile.

“Okay.”

Draco’s mouth forms into a grin, his heart leaping with joy. Oh, how he looked so cute.

“But what about Pansy?”

“What about her?”

“You do know that she’s always had this massive crush on you, right?”

Draco shrugs. “So what?”

You look at him dumbfounded. “I thought you two had a thing for each other.”

“You’re joking?” You shake your head. Draco sighs, “I’ve never liked Pansy, she gets on my nerves.”

“She’s been going around saying she was your Valentines, even showed a box of chocolates with your name on it but everyone could recognise her scruffy handwriting anywhere.” You revealed making Draco snortle.

“Ha! She wishes she was. What a freak.”

You nod trying to believe his words but you still had doubts. Draco notices your troubled look and intertwines his fingers with yours. “Besides,” he starts off. You gaze at him as he gazes back with a smile. “you’re my only valentine.”

Thus with that, he plants a kiss on your cheek making you genuinely smile at him.

●●●

“Ah, looks like Y/L/N finally stopped being emo and joined us back in class.” Mocked Pansy once she stepped inside Potions Class.

Her eyes lie on the back of your head as she struts over to your desk. You lazily sit back on your chair as you watch Pansy sit on the edge of the table.

“Welcome back,” She said with a sarcastic smile. “had an amazing time with your Valentines date?”

You respond by looking at her with a sinister smile. “Oh, you bet. ”

Pansy gives you a weird look before the door slams open and all heads turn to see the source of the loud sound. Draco walks in, his two other goons following behind. Ignoring the eyes of his classmates, he starts making his way to his desk.

You immediately stand up and march over to Draco. Your classmates start to whisper and watch you, thinking you were going to confront Draco and punch him for being an asshole.

Draco stops in his tracks once he saw you were walking towards him, and before he knew it, you grab the sides of his face and kiss him.

Everyone in the room shouts out of shock. They couldn’t believe the scene happening in front of them. One of your classmates, Seamus, makes a catcall causing a few of the boys to laugh. Draco’s goons, on the other hand, looked bewildered seeing him fraternising with the enemy. He definitely had some explaining to do.

The girls looked either jealous or happy. Your friends looked at each other with excited smiles, whilst Hermione just rolled her eyes at the view but aggressively elbowed Ron in his sides after he pulled a disgusted look. 

You pull away making Draco look at you confusingly, still taking in what had happened. 

You shoot a cheeky smile at Pansy over your shoulder, “I had an amazing time.” Pansy angrily glares at you before pushing past you and storms out of the room.

“Everyone’s going to assume we’re a thing now after you kissed me.” He teased as you looked back at him.

“Well, weren’t we always?” You wink at him and turn around, walking back to your desk leaving Draco stunned.

Draco grins to himself, “Touché.”

Both of you knew you two were going to be in the centre of attention again, the main topic to gossip about except this was going to be something new to you both. However, instead of hearing the common ‘Draco and Y/N are fighting again’, it’d turn to ‘Draco and Y/N are having a love quarrel again.’ And that made you excited.

Maybe Valentines Day isn’t a bad event after all.

[beeblebrox-be-damned]

Hotel Happenings, Part 2

Alpha!Stucky x Reader

TW: blood, birth, angst-ish stuff.

AN: Hooooooooooo boy extensive plot chapter. I swear, we’ll get to good stuff soon. Probably. Hopefully. Idk tbh. I start writing and then they kinda take on a life of their own and then we end up with a multi-part fic instea dof the originally intended oneshot. AN Part 2- Electric Boogaloo: I’ll be reblogging this later with the taglist for people who wanted to be tagged. My brain is running on empty at this point, its 4 AM, I need sleep fdjmfdmkdfvmk

Long ago, as the primordial oceans churned and raged, a species that would later rise to dominion over the primitive planet  was in the early stages of formation. It was in these barest of centuries when a great divergence took place among the genetic makeup of the creatures. A rift caused by the shifting of the planet’s crust formed, cleaving the small but steadily growing population in two.

It is in this way that one species may become two separate species, though still inextricably intertwined by common ancestors. And thus, the world beget the Humans and the Designates.

It is possible that the change would have occurred even without the rift, though it would have happened at a much slower rate. As it was, the two species, while alike in almost all ways, were unable to breed when they once more found each other.

Humans, despite lacking the prolificacy of Designates, swarmed the Earth quickly. To do so, they pushed the Designates nearly to the brink of extinction. Even today, Designates make up the minority of the Earth’s sentient inhabitants. A deep rift, this time not literal, formed between the two over the millennia that spanned the development of the modern world.

The separation of species, however, was not complete. Despite being unable to interbreed, which would have led to the eventual “out-breeding” of the Designate traits, it was apparent that one species could, through circumstances not yet understood by modern-day science, bare members of the other. It was possible for a pairing of two Humans to bring forth a Designate child and vice versa, though the anomaly remains incredibly rare.

It is possible that it wasn’t as rare as it seems. Taboo as it is to most civilized creatures, the destruction or abandonment of undesired offspring is not unheard of in the natural world. Take the instance of an albino rabbit born into a litter of normally coloured siblings. It is normal for the mother to shun the out-of-place offspring, resulting in its untimely demise. With the deep hatred between the two species it is not unfathomable that a Human or a Designate may allow offspring born of their counterpart species to die, leading to a skewed statistical error of reported counter-births.

While hatred wanes, some remain that still hold deep, unfounded malice towards the other species, as it was that led to the abandonment of our dear main character…

……………………………

“C’mon, c’mon. It’ll be okay… just a little further and then we can- can-” the man’s words stuttered to a stop with a distressed whine. His Alpha tugged at his hand, urging him to allow her to sit and rest. One of her hands clutched her swollen belly tightly, her face twisted in agony.

“No, ‘Mega. I need to sit. F-uck.” Her words were tight, pained. A gust of wind brushed her hair away from her face as she slid to the ground, letting go of her distressed Omega’s hand. She leaned against a tree as he crouched down beside her. He gave a small whine, fear shining in his wide eyes. 

The moon, covered with piebald clouds, provided very little light in the forest. He couldn’t see the red, but he could smell the blood. His frantic whines grew louder. His panting Alpha reached up and stroked her hand over his cheek. “Hush now, it’ll be alright. We’ll just have to- ah!” Her words cut off in a sharp cry of agony. After a moment, she regained her breath. “Y-your jacket, give me your jacket,” she sputtered, “Can’t wait any longer.”

Her Omega, despite his panic, obeyed promptly. He shrugged the ragged jacket off of his thin shoulders and with the Alpha’s guidance, spread it beneath her. Her hair clung to her forehead as she groaned, her Omega watching by helplessly.

“Alpha, we need to get to a hospital, need to get help-” he cried, hands scrambling feebly to try to assist with the birth. “There’s so much blood- oh god there’s so much blood.” Tears streamed freely down his cheeks, mingling with the rain that spat from the sky.

“Shh, shh, it’s alright,” the Alpha said weakly, taking one of his bloodied hands in her own. Her thumb stroked his skin softly as she locked her gaze on his. It pained her more than the physical pain of birth to see her beloved so distraught. “It will be alright, I promise.” Her voice was steadily growing weaker, the blood pooling around her. “Just… hold my hand. She’s almost here.”

He held her hand tightly, too afraid to look, too afraid to see how much blood was leaching from her body. She could feel the infant crowing, almost ready. She wished it had been different, wished she could watch her first pup grow up. Gripping her Omega’s hand tightly and using her last reserve of strength, she gave a final harsh push. A wail greeted her ears as she slipped into the velveteen darkness.

The Omega listen to the child wail, frozen in place. He could feel it in his bond when his Alpha’s last breath left her body. He leapt onto her, frantically trying to breathe life back into her limp form. His heart wrenched in his chest as the hopelessness of it hit him. His a loud cry he stood, turning his face away as he screamed curses towards the inky tree-tops.

A whine reminded him of the new life. Swallowing another scream, he turned to gaze upon the pup he had sired. He laughed through his grief as he realized it was indeed a girl, just as his Alpha had thought. They hadn’t been able to go to the doctor to find out for sure, too poor to pay the bills, too poor to even afford proper clothing. But they had each other.

They had each other. No more.

He leaned down, gathering his daughter in the bloodied rag of a jacket he had worn. He sobbed, eyes shut tight as the pain hit him in waves. As he stared at the infant, he realized just how tiny she was. Horror and rage slowly crept over him, and his frown grew into a sneer.

“Y-you,” he growled, “you’re human.” There was venom in his voice, centuries of hatred. Had the light been stronger, he may have seen he was mistaken. But perhaps not. The scent glands of a premature Designated infant are very difficult to locate, nor do they produce any of the scent that differentiates the two species.

He stood, holding the infant far from his body. “A human… a human killed her.” His voice rose in pitch. “A human killed my Alpha. You killed her,” he screamed. “You killed her!”

Part of him wanted to toss the infant to the ground and run, but something kept him from doing so. With an angered sob, he clutched the baby close again. He couldn’t bring himself to do it. Nor did he want to raise this pup, this human, on his own. 

It was then, as he looked up, that he happened to glimpse a small glint of light through the trees. An old woman had just happened to be awake then, unable to sleep though she did not know why. He stumbled forward, eyes fixed on the light. A window came into view, illuminating a trellis-archway above a doorstep.

The scent of wisteria hung heavily in the air as the infant cried.

……………………….

The woman brushed the hair off of her neck, wincing as sweat caused it to cling to her skin. Steam rose from the large pots on the stove and heat poured from the oven. The windows were open as wide as they could go, but it did little to ease the stifling heat of the small kitchen.

Turning on her heel, she walked over to the door, pushing it open and haphazardly fanning it back and forth in an attempt to stir up the air. After a moment she gave up, opting instead to prop it open. She really needed to get a fan or something to put in the kitchen. This old building just wasn’t very well ventilated, and the air conditioning on this side had never worked quite properly after it was installed. She never bothered to have it repaired since it still worked in the guest rooms and the second floor. There just wasn’t the money in the bank account to do it.

Content that the potatoes were far enough away from boiling over and the roast wasn’t going anywhere, she ducked out of the hot room and strolled down the short hall between the dining area, kitchen, and foyer. Ro was still in the office, her usual spot. Before she had lost her sight, she would spend hours looking out the office’s large window to observe the wildlife. It held especially fond memories, she had told the woman once, because that was the first room she ever held her in after she’d been left outside the foyer doorsteps.

The woman knocked on the door, signaling her presence so she wouldn’t startle the elderly lady. Of course, she probably had heard her coming down the hall, but it was better to be safe than sorry. “Yes?” came the reply promptly.

The woman pushed open the door and stepped inside, propping it open wide. She sat down in a comfortable chair across from Ro’s rocker, wiping at her sweat-sticky forehead. “It’s awful warm today, isn’t it?”

Ro raised her eyebrow, pursing her lips. “Not particularly, but I can imagine it mus’ be hot in that stuffy little kitchen. How’s the roast comin’ along?” Her gnarled hands rested on her lap, clasping each other lightly.

The woman smiled. “It’s in the oven as we speak. Had to get out the big one we’d saved in the freezer. Got a lot of guests today.” She paused a moment, thinking. “How’d you know we were having roast?”

Ro chuckled. “Silly girl. I can smell it. Smells real nice too. Did ye’ use rosemary?” Her face was turned towards the window, the light from it highlighting each smile-line and wrinkle that the woman loved so dearly. As time she had to spend with her adoptive guardian grew shorter, she spent more time committing each detail about her to memory.

“Yeah, fresh from the garden. I added a little thyme too, but not a whole lot.” She leaned forward and took one of Ro’s hands in her own, smiling as Ro gently squeezed her fingers. “You’ll never guess who our guests are, Mama. I was so shocked I almost passed clean out.”

Ro turned towards her, eyebrow raised. “Yeah? Who is it, baby?” Her wispy hair circled her face loosely where it had slipped out of the confines of her bun.

“You remember a few years back when that mind-controlled man invaded New York with aliens?” the woman asked, remembering the chaos that had been broadcast live on all the major news channels. Ro nodded, pursing her lips as she remembered. 

“Those were nasty lookin’ creatures,” she said, shaking her head. “Nasty, nasty, nasty.”

“Agreed,” said the woman, finding herself nodding even though her companion couldn’t see it. “Anyway, there were those people that defeated them and chased the rest of them off. The Avengers.”

Ro nodded, licking her lips. “Now you aren’t tellin’ me,” she said, “that the Avengers are staying at our hotel, are you?” The quirk of her eyebrow marked her slight disbelief.

“Yup, they are. No- I’m not kidding.” She replied, watching the surprised look on Ro’s face. “And he’s with them, Mama.”

Ro laughed loudly, rocking back in her chair for a moment. “Well I’ll be darned,” she said, chuckling excitedly. “Never in my life did I ever think I’d get to meet the Captain America himself in person, let alone havin’ him an; his whole team stay in the hotel! My, my, this world sure is a funny place.”

Ro had spent many nights tucking her into bed and telling her stories when she was young. Often times, the stories were mostly true, centered around Ro’s favorite hero from World War 2, Captain America. As the woman got older, she figured out that Ro had had a bit of a crush on him, as most women of his time probably had. It had come as a great surprise to both of them when the word got out his body had been found- alive. Ro had clapped her hands and declared that miracles really did happen.

“Dinner will be ready soon, do you want to go ahead down to the dining room?” Ro released the woman’s hand and nodded, allowing her to stand. She walked to the corner of the room and retrieved Ro’s wheelchair, bringing it over to her. She helped her stand and situate herself in the wheelchair.

As they moved past the open kitchen, the woman winced at the heat. Even being in Ro’s cooled office, she still was uncomfortably warm. Ro seemed to sense her discomfort, tilting her head with a quizzical stare as the woman situated her at the dining table.

“What’s wrong, Mama?” the woman asked as she pulled open the chest of drawers where the good silverware was kept. She and Ro wouldn’t usually use it, as most guests opted to dine out in the town, but this was a special occasion to warrant the carefully polished utensils.

Ro hummed thoughtfully. “Nothin’ baby, you just seems a little off today. You sure you ain’t feelin’ unwell?” She couldn’t see her ward, but she could hear there was something unusual just by the change in the pace of the woman’s steps. They were almost sluggish.

The woman carefully spread the tablecloth over the hard oak table, moving on to place dishes at each seat. “To be perfectly honest, I’m a bit tired I suppose. I think the heat has me down,” she admitted, smoothing the tablecloth idly as she examined herself.

Ro frowned, worried. “Baby, it’s not that hot out. C’mere,” she said, beckoning with one hand. The woman came over obediently, knowing Ro wouldn’t take no for an answer. She knelt beside the wheelchair, allowing Ro to place her hand against her forehead. It was cold, pleasantly so. She nearly found herself leaning into the touch. “Child, you are positively burning up! If it weren’t for your tone a’ voice, I’d say you had a fever.”

The woman stood. “Odd. Other than the warmth, I feel fine.” She laid out napkins and the silverware, making sure each place was properly set. Perhaps if they made a good impression on their guests, they’d recommend the place to others. Wistful thinking, honestly, but it was worth a shot.

Ro pursed her lips, her worry clearly written across her face. “If you insist, baby. Just take it easy after dinner. The dishes ‘ll wait until morning just fine.”

The woman smiled. “Alright, Mama, whatever you say.” Satisfied the table was set properly, she returned to the kitchen to finish prepping the meal.

…………………..

“Alright, Mama, ready?” the woman asked, making sure Ro was comfortably seated in the chairlift to their upstairs residency. She pressed the button, briefly pausing to make sure the chair was running properly before turning and folding up the wheelchair so she could carry it with a bit more ease up the stairs. “So,” she asked as she followed Ro up the stairs, “what’d you think of the Avengers?”

Ro gave a hearty laugh, grinning widely. “They are somethin’ else! I tell you what, I’m glad they’re stayin’ for a couple days. They’ve gotta be the liveliest bunch we’ve had here in years.”

The woman smiled as they reached the top of the stairs, unfolding the wheelchair and assisting Ro back into it. The elderly lady could walk short distances with a walker to the bathroom and such, but you both agreed it was far safer for her to use the wheelchair for most things. The woman had made it abundantly clear that she didn’t mind caring for Ro but had agreed at Ro’s stubborn insistence that should the burden ever be too much, she would take her to the local retirement home.

“I’ve got to agree with you there, Mama.” She took Ro to her room, making sure everything was in order for the night. She waited outside the door as Ro readied herself for bed. “So, what’d you think about Captain Rog-, er, Steve?” Steve had insisted on them referring to him by his first name, as did most of the others, including Bucky. He had seemed almost embarrassed to request being called James instead of ‘Mr. Barnes’, but the grin he wore hearing it was certainly a sight to behold.

Ro shuffled out of the bathroom and sat down on the edge of the bed, slipping off her houseshoes. The woman leaned over and carefully undid her bun, setting the pins on the nightstand and grabbing a hairbrush. “He’s such a charmer,” Ro said, “just like he was back in the day. And such a sweetheart! I swear, that man doesn’t have a mean bone in his body. And his friend seems awful nice too. What was his name? James?”

The woman smiled softly as she finished combing Ro’s hair. “They are quite nice, aren’t they. I can’t believe they offered to help clean up after dinner. I guess that’s the sort of kindness people have been loosing, huh?” she sighed. 

Ro smiled and patted her hand. “Baby, sometimes kindness is all we got. I’m proud of you, did you know that? So proud.” She paused, squeezing her hand tightly. “I’m glad you showed up on my doorstep. Who knew such a tiny little thing would grow up to be such a strong lady.”

The woman smiled, eyes misting as she walked towards the bedroom door. “It’s all because of you, Mama Ro. You’ve taught me a lot. Sleep well, call for me if you need anything. Love you.” She shut the door partway and departed to her own room across the hall, opening the window wide to let in the cool night air before she baked in her own skin.

Ro settled back into her pillows. Her face was aimed towards her own window, moonlight highlighting the wise elder’s features. “I don’t know if it’s all ‘cause of me,” she murmured to herself. “Beginin’ to think it may be heritage too.” She chuckled to herself. “My baby ain’t human at all. This is one funny world.”

………………………..

Downstairs, two men were settling into bed, eagerly settling into the crisp, clean-smelling sheets that bore the faint scent of the woman, who they were now sure was an Omega, who’d placed them earlier.

“Jesus, Steve, that was a good meal. She sure can cook,” Buck said, turning over on his side to face his longtime friend and partner. It was a bit odd for two Alphas to be in a relationship, let alone one so long-term, without an Omega to accompany them, but Bucky felt sure that was going to change soon.

Steve smiled, stifling a yawn. “Absolutely. I could get used to that.” He chuckled, resting his arms behind his head, contentment washing over him. It was silent for several minutes, but then Steve spoke up again. “So, we’re gonna talk about what’s going on, right? I could tell by the look on your face soon as we walked into the dining room that you could smell her too.”

Bucky nodded. “Yeah, alright, I did. She’s definitely an Omega. So faint though, kinda strange.” The only Designates he’d ever known who’d been so faint of scent were the ones who’d been on heavy suppressants for much longer than the recommended usage period, but that couldn’t be the case with the hostess seeing as she thought she was human.

“Did it- well, no, maybe it was just my imagination- well, did it maybe smell to you like she’s going into, well, y’know…” Steve glanced over at Bucky with his eyebrows raised, reluctant to say what was on the tip of his tongue.

“Heat?” Bucky snorted at Steve’s coyness. “So strong I thought I was gonna pop a goddamn knot right in the middle of dinner. Super-soldier senses are both a blessing and a curse. Nat and Bruce had it lucky.”

Steve nodded in agreement. “I guess what I’m thinking is… what if she’s never had much contact with other Designates and that delayed… stuff? Maybe our scents or something, I don’t know, triggered her presentation.”

Bucky rolled onto his stomach, wrapping one arm around Steve’s torso as he buried his face in his pillow. “We can look into it tomorrow. For now, get some sleep punk. G’night.”

Steve smiled. “Night.”

[jochmus]

Method of Loci and Reality Shifting

There was a video from a source that I will not name that brought this community to my attention. Thus, if you will allow me to do so, I am going to give my two-cents on the matter. Let us see how this goes. 

In terms of reality shifting itself, I do not think that it is a real phenomena, at least in the way that it is presented in terms of literally going to another universe. However, I know that this would not go over well, so instead of contesting the whole of reality shifting and getting chewed-out by everyone, I am going to instead compare it to something that I think is more realistic: Memory Palaces. Reality shifting, really, may be understood as a form of creating spontaneous memory palaces, like in dreams with space (not outer space but more along the lines of “distance”) in them. 

Assuming that most of you reading this are children or young adults, I do not necessarily want to be responsible for getting you into memory palaces, or more properly the Method of Loci. To be honest I only know about such a method from the title of Frances Yates’ book on the subject, which I learned about from studying Giordano Bruno. Indeed there is another post on my account about him that may be of interest. 

Without attempting to invalidate anyone aside from the second paragraph, as that is not my intention at all, okay, I would like to delve into a brief summary of memory palaces, and how they contrast with reality shifting. Then I will seek an integration of the two. 

If I am to be frank, my intention with this post is to help to transform Dark Academia into the next Renaissance, in accordance with the theory of a certain YouTuber. I have come to the conclusion that in order to make this work, the “aesthetic” element of Dark Academia will need to be replaced with actually finding and reading great texts from around the world. Here’s to hoping that can happen with this discussion of the Method of Loci or Memory Palaces augmenting the practice of Reality Shifting. Food for thought; cheers, and lets get down to the meat of this essay.

* * *

Memory palaces function with two essential elements: The space of the building or location where the perception takes place, and then the mnemonic devices intended to enable memorizing things. You could potentially build a memory palace in Minecraft if visualization is difficult for you, but that is a bit off topic. Cicero the Roman Senator and rhetorician came up with the method in the first place, and Giordano Bruno wrote many books on the subject. The specific division of the elements of a memory palace in my own take, admittedly I do not know too much about any of this, but I was hoping to make this post anyway and see what someone could make of it. 

Spatial memory is obviously going to be important with regards to designing and using a memory palace. An author that I will not mention... Well actually he was the guy who wrote Maps of Meaning, but I am not in agreement with absolutely everything that he says. For instance, his protest of the use of gender pronouns in the name of freedom of speech was quite silly, and in fact invalidating for the transgender community, and I do not condone that. At the same time, I do not buy into the other idea that all of his work is utter gibberish, a stance that some people stand by. His work is a mixed bag. I contrasted the titular maps of meaning with memory palaces, and it seems that they both fundamentally rely on differences between values, and spatial memory respectively. Hypothetically both latter terms generally feel to me like they are the same. 

As for the design of the memory palace itself, why, it can be any location that you wish; fictional, natural or real. The problem is knowing the architecture of the fictional place, as I know that people on here are really into fandoms and that is inevitable. A historical-mythical anecdote is the Temple of Solomon and the fascination that Europeans such as Isaac Newton had with its layout as described in the Old Testament of the Bible. Idk, but at least we have those cross section books now, so it should be much easier. Either that or you can design it yourself in your mind, on paper, in Minecraft or using Lego Digital Designer. Yes, that software is still my favorite Lego CAD (computer aided design) despite having not used it in years. 

In terms of icons that populate the memory palace, they could be construed as NPCs or something that you could potentially generate by listing out human emotions, and more importantly how people express them. There is a field called Kinesics (not kinesthetics as I almost typed) and this deals with body motion and expression, but keep in mind that this is advanced college-level stuff. It could be used to image various body movements for these NPCs and enable a very vivid experience. Again, although I want to spur interest in the transformation of the Dark Academia community into a Lay Renaissance; the method of accomplishing this is to “ditch the aesthetic,” a tag I have appended to this post, and start reading classic texts, at the same time I do not want to be responsible for a bunch of teenagers and children getting into subjects that are either occult related, or too dense for them to understand properly. (I think I’ll make another post about the “ditch the aesthetic” movement eventually.) This distinction is of great importance to me, and I hope that whoever is reading this can appreciate that. 

I do not know the intricacies of reality shifting, so I will not talk about that today. You probably know much more that I do about it, and although I do not entirely agree, I can respect what you believe. 

The last thing that I have to say, or, two things, is that if you accentuate your the things you want to remember with strong emotion, then those things will be more conducive to be remembered. The same thing applies to memory palaces and reality shifting. This advice was stated by Giordano Bruno himself in one of his books, which name I unfortunately can’t recall. 

Lastly, if the whole reality shifting thing gets too intense for you, I’d recommend just leaving the community, or more realistically just sitting on the sidelines and taking in some of the positivity emitted from the community, as I have seen some of the posts on here and they look like they do that. I don’t want to stir up any controversy, but if you have constructive criticism I would love to hear it in the comments. I don’t personally think that disagreement needs to be angry, as that just isn’t really feasible in terms of the proper functioning of society. Conversation and the exchange of ideas is better than being angry, and I hope that I have been civil enough in writing this. Sorry that this whole essay was so long in the first place; if you read all of this, I commend you. 

[outofcontextsimsmachinima]

I truly think you should reconsider featuring Youth so much on this blog. The series has featured blackface and other racist imagery before, it's really not a good look for the Sims fandom to promote this stuff, especially seeing how racist EA themselves have been in the past.

Hello, thank you for approaching me with your concerns. I in no way want to promote racism. You have every right to feel how you do and leave my blog to not see her posts (all tagged under #1998sims and #youth, which you can blacklist) and not watch her content. Its not my place to apologise on anyones behalf. However, although this may be an out of context blog, I think its unfair to make a statement as such without the context of the episode. This opinion may come from this post I uploaded a while back, or from breifly seeing her episode. Or even watching it all the way and either not understanding the message OR simply put, being offended by the imagery (which you have every right to feel offended by) 1998sims is a very close friend of mine. However, what I say is not as a friend as I will, and have, quite easily dropped anyone who is racist, homophobic, a pedophile, etc. I’m not afraid to lose friends or family over morals. That being said, I also want to mention that if you’ve met 1998sims and properly got to know her, you’d also know she has a no bullshit attitude and she herself cannot stand those actions. Shes always trying to keep up to date on human rights movements, sending me updates on the currently BLM protests, complaining about racists and homophobes and wishing people wouldnt support the racist billionares and companies (EA included) of the world. I also want to mention before i start jumping into this unbiased, that as 1998sims’ friend, I see a lot of a specific group of people trying to attack her every month or so. She’s used to it and doesn’t let it bother her, often tells us not to say anything on her behalf (which is interesting considering how many times people say she’s going to get her “groupies” to defend her. Not once have we defended her because we respect her wishes for us to not get involved.) and that she can fight her own fights. Its upsetting watching her put up with people nitpicking her in the most toxic community out tbh, the shit that could be said about the people who ?? I actually dont know what their goal is tbh, take her down?? idk its really weird. Like, I think people who try to come at her do a lot worse than her and often times are trying to come back at her after she openly stated her opinions about the community (usually its her asking that creators had more representation in their series. Which I can agree with, the sims community is flooded with stories of straight white couples). The sims community is shit, I wont deny. So, with this context in mind, I do struggle to take the rare posts I see about her as seriously as I would if they were about anyone else. I talk to her on a daily, I know the thoughts she puts into her work, into her daily life, into her friendships, past and present. Her opinions and goals and the things she puts up with. I know that the specific group of people against her would try to warp my words around and say she controlling or manipulating me but honestly, one, those people claiming something like that in itself is a manipulation tactic and two, you dont know fuck about me and my past and what I’ve experienced to understand who to trust and who to drop. I don’t put up with that sort of shit. Over her time on youtube she has very openly showed her support to the black lives movement and tried to bring light to it in her works. She has always been very aware of making sure her cast represents real people, that includes the struggles they face. Its rare to find poc and lgbtq media, especially in the sims community and especially without characters following harmful stereotypes or being the token black or gay character. 1998sims has always shown care for these communities in multiple series for multiple years, taking every opportunity she can to make a PSA. The blackface episode was no exception. I dont want to speak on her behalf and have stayed quiet about what people have said about her because of her wishes, and I will message her about this issue. But in the end, its my blog that has recieved the asks and thus, my response is what will be made. This will be long (if its not already) and its up to you to skip or read this, your mental health is what should come first. Nothing can excuse racist imagery or jokes about race. I never want to tell someone they’re in the wrong or that their feelings do not matter, your feelings and opinions matter. What 1998sims choses to do from here onward is up to her. But as I said, you approached me and I will take that as invitation to share my opinion. In the episode ‘Blakkkface’ of YOUTH, the title alone already explaining the episodes intention to be around the black lives matter movement, racism and mention of blackface and the KKK. Its halloween, 2 racist background characters walk in dressed in blackface and as a member of the KKK. Instantly the main cast is disgusted. This scene is not intended as humour or a joke, rather the main cast showing disgust in a background character’s actions. Lucas responding with a “what the fuck?” and Jo, a black character, also the only one not dressed up, stating that costumes like that are why she hates halloween. I believe here its intended to mention how during holidays, people think its okay to wear costumes like that. be it blackface, KKK members, indiginous costumes, chinese etc. Peoples race and culture arent a costume and 1998sims attempted to show how costumes like that happen often irl and how hurtful and racist they are. Next scene. I’m Not Racist by Joyner Lucas plays in the background. Teacher rants about inappropriate costumes. Cut to a close up of Jo’s face obvious waiting for the issue to be addressed. Teacher mentions girls wearing costumes that are inappropriate, too tight or short, makes no mention of racist costumes or issues with it. Clearly Jo and her classmate, Trey (also a black cast member, wearing a shirt that states “not your costume” as a protest to the racist costumes during halloween), aren’t happy and chose to silently protest by sitting while the class pledges alleigence to the flag. The teacher gets mad at the two who are quite calmly explaining their rights, which starts a debate. The blackface and KKK costumes are brought up, Jo calls out racism and the two take advantage of their priveledge, claiming its just paint telling Jo not to be offended and that shes being sensitive. This is a clear case of racists making excuses, trying to victimize themselves and using their privelege against Jo. Teacher, unable to respond to Jo’s retort then takes it out on Trey, Saying his shirt is inappropriate and promotes violence (does that sound familiar to the black likes matter movement at the moment?), that he needs to go to the office. Trey questions if the teacher himself is racist, calls everyone disgusting for their actions. Teacher sends both students to go to the office and as Jo walks past, the racist students call her a monkey which is the final straw and she punches them. She regrets it later knowing the outcome will be terrible on her behalf as a black girl. Trey beside her, tries to validate her and she mentions how shes the one whos going to be suspended but the person whos actually in the wrong will play victim as their actions will be forgotten about. she says “I played into the narrative he wanted me to play into.” saying she doesnt want to be the stereotypical black person that solves issues through violence. Trey once again tries to validate her actions, telling her that she had the right to defend herself. “dont let them make you feel bad for their crappy actions.” What 1998sims shows here is the real life struggle that black people face. Them being seen as a costume, their history being a joke to racists. That people of privelege and power can manipulate situations and try to paint themsleves as victims and black people as violent, often gaslighting until, in some cases (like Jo’s) the real victim takes actions in their own hands since the system cant protect them and they need to protect themself. This is a serious and real topic and yes, understandably it can be triggering to some people who have experienced these things themselves. I dont think 1998sims’ goal is to hurt people though. Rather show a character you care about or relate to going through something thats very real and make her viewers aware of said issues, use empathy to make people mad or upset and maybe stand up to make a change to stop these things from continuing to happen in the real world. Once again, I apologise for posting any content that has been hurtful to you. But morally I felt the need to at least add some context on why this episode and scenes were intended to, from the perspective of someone whos against racism, someone who wants equality, someone who wants to share a message. 1998sims’ series is raw in the sense its real and inspired by reality. Some people like that sort of representation in the media they consume, some dont. And if you dont, thats up to you to not watch her content. If you prefer media that escapes reality, her series isnt for you and thats okay. And I just need to say this once again. I’m not defending her or the episopde because shes my friend. If I find out her or anyone I know has made content thats intended to be hurtful to anyone, I will drop them. I have no intention ever in my life to be associated with people like that. I’m sorry that you can no longer feel safe on my blog though, its sad that has to be the case but I hope at least with the context of the episode brought up, maybe you can see things in a different way. If not, I hope you find safety somewhere else. Its what you deserve after all, don’t put yourself through any more harm, you should always come first.

[mintchocolateleaves]

Hello! I just saw your tags on the recent reblog (writing due to hating published books) and I was wondering if I could ask why you hate Twilight so much you wrote your own vampire story? Is Twilight really that bad? Also, how did you get started on writing? And, what does it mean to spite write? You don’t have to answer any of these if you don’t want to, tho! Thank you in advance, and have a lovely weekend! 😊

Hiii! I’m late to answering this one, my bad! But here goes, under the cut:

why you hate Twilight so much you wrote your own vampire story? Is Twilight really that bad?

Okay, I have a bunch of problems with twilight, and it’s not just because “OMG the vampires are sparkly and there’s so much teen angst”. It’s the way the characters are written and portrayed.

Edward and his creepy watching of Bella? Seems too stalkerish for me to let it fall into romance territory. Don’t get me wrong, if you’re in bed with your S.O., and you wake up? Watching them for a while, is pretty cute in writing. But going out of your way to go into her house each evening to watch her sleep, and then disappearing when she wakes up? That’s a level of obsession I wouldn’t want to be near.

And… it’s portrayed as romantic? That’s not romance. That’s a crime.

What else is there? The whole concept that Bella begins weighing her self worth against whether she’s with Edward. She’s so in love with him and she spirals into full blown depression, not caring anymore when he goes. Nope. I can’t.

Additionally, the whole… end of New Moon, where Edward goes to kill himself because he can’t be with Bella, and expose his sparkly ass to the world? The fact that he was suicidal and that was never mentioned again after Bella found him again? Poor writing of mental health.

If someone’s going to reach that point, authors, I expect you too keep that mental state continuing into the next scene. Mental health is important and to erase that is a big plot point you’re just… leaving open and forgetting never happened.

Also??? Reneesme? And Jacob. I’m sorry. Stephanie Meyer, what? Is it supposed to be cute that Jacob and Reneesme are meant to be? Because it’s not. It’s just creepy. She’s a baby and he’s turning around like: We’re soulmates, I’ve imprinted on her and she’ll be mine when she’s older.

That’s… nope. Honestly, that’s probably one of Bella’s only responses in this entire franchise where I was like: Yeah. You go. And everyone immediately tells her she’s overreacting??

Listen, I have so many issues with Twilight. I can’t defend it. Maybe I’d have liked it more if Bella had any sort of independence, or took more of an active role. But she never did, not until the very final few chapters of the final book. Everything happens to her without her having to try.

And I can see how that could be really interesting to young teenagers. They want a dreamboat and adventure to come lift them off their feet, they want romance and cute vampire boyfriends. But no. I didn’t enjoy it. I read them because someone told me to, and to properly be able to say: hey no, I don’t like these.

I think the books idealise poor relationships and should not be the things that young girls (and boys, idk) look up to in terms of ‘good relationships.

Also, how did you get started on writing?

I can’t really say I’m all too certain because I’ve been writing since… forever ago? I was really little. I think I began properly when I was five or six, and my dad brought home this really crappy laptop. We didn’t have word, but we DID have notepad, and together we’d write bad but fun little stories together before bed. My mum would read to me, but my dad would always write with me!

And it kind of just… stuck? I loved stories, so I kept writing and reading. I’ve still got a lot of old things I wrote when I was younger. They’re special stories to me.

If you mean fanfiction? Then I started writing that when I was 11-12, so about ten years ago, after my friend introduced me to fanfiction.net. I had two accounts before settling on my current username, but eventually, I swapped over to this username. And thus, here we are!

And, what does it mean to spite write?

Spite writing is literally. Sometimes you’ll look at something and think: I could approach this better. For example, you read the ending to a book, think it was bad and write your own ending that you like better. It’s less writing out of spite, so much - although that can be part of it - and more writing a new version of something that you think either fits better, or you like better.

[metaphorical-love-for-a-car]

Marry You-- Joe Mazzello x Reader

Request; “How about a joe mazzello based on the song marry you by Bruno  Mars? Idk” ( @hi-i-dont-know )

Warnings; some language, the song is fem! specific but the story itself isn’t

Word Count; 1.8k

Notes; sorry it's taken me so long to get around to this lol

You couldn’t believe it. You had worked so hard for so long, and you finally did it. Here you were, standing on a stage, accepting an award at a prestigious ceremony. People were clapping, and cameras were everywhere. Never in a million years did you expect this to happen. 

You stuttered through your acceptance speech before scurrying back to your seat. The rest of the awards ceremony seemed to go by in a haze as you continued to try to wrap your mind around the evening. You were in desperate need of a drink, and the after party couldn’t come soon enough.

Dozens of people came up to congratulate you, and you only recognized about half of them. You quickly gulped down your drinks in an attempt to make yourself calm down. It wasn’t the wisest idea, but it was all you could do besides leaving the party, which you obviously didn’t want to do. You were tipsy, borderline drunk, and still feeling overwhelmed. That’s when he decided to approach you. The last thing you needed was your childhood celebrity crush to show up, but that’s exactly what happened.

Your first introduction to Joe Mazzello was when you watched Radio Flyer shortly after it came out, then you saw him again in Jurassic Park. Your younger self thought he was cute, thus your childhood crush formed. As years went on and the two of you started to become more successful in the world of entertainment, you had met each other once or twice, but it was always in passing. Neither of you really spoke to each other much. The most interaction the two of you had was via social media, occasionally liking each other’s posts. 

Needless to say, you were worried about embarrassing yourself because you had too much alcohol in your system for your mind to properly function, and it didn’t help that you continued to drink. “I’m sure you’re going to be sick of hearing this by the end of the night, but congratulations!” Joe flashed you a bright smile. You laughed before thanking him. “Mind if I sit?” He nodded his head towards the empty stool next to yours. You shook your head.

“No, not at all!” Joe sat, and the two of you chatted about basic stuff, like ‘Have you tried the shrimp? It’s pretty good!’ or ‘I’ve been going ninety-to-nothing tonight and can’t wait to finally get home.’ You normally felt awkward during small talk, but this was nice. Maybe it was just the alcohol that was making this feel so comfortable. Maybe it was just his charming personality. Either way, you didn’t care. You were enjoying it. 

“Hope I’m not bothering you. I’m sure a ton of other people would like to talk to you.” You scoffed at Joe’s comment and dramatically rolled your eyes.

“Oh, please! I’m having way more fun talking to you than I would have if I were talking to some of them. Besides, it’s not every day that you get to hang out with your age-old celebrity crush.” You brought your glass to your lips and froze. Did you seriously just say that out loud? No, surely not. You weren’t that drunk, right? You slowly lowered the glass, glancing over at Joe. Shit. You did say it out loud. His mouth was open, looking shocked. And his cheeks were red. 

“You... wait. I’m your celebrity crush?” You felt the heat rising to your face and nodded. He ran a hand through his hair. “No fucking way. This is crazy. You’ve been my celebrity crush since we first met at that movie premiere a few years ago,” Joe said enthusiastically, very much resembling a child telling their friends about the cool toy they got for Christmas. You covered your mouth in an attempt to stifle your laughter. Joe’s brows knitted together, but his goofy grin remained. “I’m serious!” 

“This is too good to be true. It sounds like something out of a fanfiction book on Wattpad or Tumblr.” Joe laughed, stating his agreement. He suddenly grabbed your hand. His eyes were wide and mischief danced across his features.

“I’ve got an awesome idea, and it’ll really make life like a fanfic.” You pursed your lips, eyeing him suspiciously.

“What’re you planning, Joe?” 

“It’s a surprise! Now, where’s the closest Walmart?”

Who cares if we're trashed Got a pocket full of cash we can blow Shots of Patron And it's on girl

The two of you managed to find an Uber at the ungodly hour of the morning it was. People gave you odd looks when you first walked into the store. Some because they recognized the two of you, and some because you were both in incredibly formal attire... while drunk shopping in Walmart. You headed straight towards the candy, and Joe disappeared. As you were paying for the mountain of candy in your arms, you felt someone tap on your shoulder. It was Joe, nervously shifting his weight from one foot to the other. “You okay?” you snickered, grabbing the plastic bag from the worker before thanking her. 

'Cause it's a beautiful night, we're looking for something dumb to do Hey baby, I think I wanna marry you Is it the look in your eyes or is it this dancing juice Who cares baby, I think I wanna marry you

“Actually, there’s something important I want to ask you.” You raised a brow at him, and he took a deep breath. When Joe got down on one knee, your jaw dropped. He pulled out a ring that had a little silver frog on top, its back made of a green gem. “Let’s continue with the fanfiction themed night, shall we?” You laughed, nodding. Joe beamed up at you and slid the ring onto your finger.

“Is this actually happening right now?” you asked in between laughs. Joe shrugged. 

“Dunno. That sounds like something for our sober selves to figure out. Wanna check out the Redbox movies?”

I'll go get a ring Let the choir bell sing like ooh So what you wanna do Let's just run girl If we wake up and you want to break up That's cool No, I won't blame you It was fun girl

Your head was pounding. Bringing a hand to your face, you rubbed your eyes before squinting them open. How much did you drink last night? You could hardly remember a thing... that is until you realized you weren’t in your hotel room, nor were you alone. An arm was wrapped around your waist, and the person’s head was nuzzled against your back. Fucking shit. Your mind was reeling, trying to remember what had happened. A part of your mind tried to rationalize that maybe you didn’t hook up with someone. After all, you were still dressed. Then again... the sweats and baggy shirt didn’t belong to you. 

You were worried about waking whoever was beside you. You were desperate to avoid any awkward and embarrassing interactions. Slowly reaching out, you went to pull your phone off of the bedside table. That’s when you noticed the ring. Your breath got caught in your throat as a sudden sense of urgency flooded your system. You tried to turn your phone on, but a black screen stared back at you. Of course, it was dead. Well, there was only one thing you could do. You started peeling yourself from the person’s grasp. As you did, the person stirred. When you were finally able to turn and look at them, it felt like someone dumped a bucket of rocks into your stomach. “Damn... my head’s killin’ me,” Joe groaned while rubbing his face. Your mouth open and closed. You couldn’t think of anything to say. Joe removed his hands, finally meeting your gaze. His eyes widened. “Oh my god...” was all the could muster up.

“Joe, what the hell happened last night?” You showed him your hand, and his face reddened. 

“Well... I-- uh-- don’t remember much. I don’t think we had sex, but I don’t know about that.” He pointed at the ring. Joe quickly sat up, snatching his phone from the floor. Thankfully, it had been charging. 

He had multiple missed calls and unopened text messages from his friends, most of which said something along the lines of ‘Joe, what the hell is going on? Is this real?’ Joe swiped through his camera roll, but most of the pictures were goofy selfies or short videos of the two of you wandering around Walmart. It didn’t really offer much information. You suggested looking through your social media accounts. Lo and behold, it was the jackpot. Your twitter was filled with cringe-worthy levels of cheesy and sappy pickup lines, all of which had Joe tagged in them. He responded to a few, but his replies only consisted of various heart emojis. Joe’s Instagram story had dozens of photos and videos of you two, most of which you had already seen in his camera roll. Then there was one post that had the caption ‘I liked it so I put a ring on it (guess we’re engaged now)’, and you had commented ‘#couplegoals’. You decided to take a look into your own Instagram account, clicking through the story photos you remembered posting. When it finally got to something new, you couldn’t help the butterflies that formed in your chest. 

It was a video of Joe, laying in bed next to you. Your head was on his chest, and you had an arm draped across his torso. You were out cold, and Joe had a soft smile on his face. “(Y/N) fell asleep in the middle of our Night At The Museum marathon, so I decided to hack their insta.” He glanced down at you, his smile growing even wider. “They’re so adorable, even when they’re snoring like a freight train. But don’t let them know that I told you guys that,” he said the last part with a serious expression. Joe pressed a kiss to the top of your head, then the video ended.

“So I guess we got engaged,” you mumbled, examining the little frog ring on your finger. “We know that much happened.”

“What now?” Joe asked, his voice barely above a whisper. You glanced at him, and he was idly tracing a pattern into the bed’s comforter. 

“Well, first, I think we should get some breakfast. I don’t know about you, but I’m starving. Then maybe we could start with a date and see how that goes?” Joe looked up, meeting your gaze. A smile spread across his lips.

“I like that plan.”

Don't say no no no no no Just say yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah And we'll go go go go go If you're ready, like I'm ready

Just say I do Tell me right now baby Tell me right now baby, baby Just say I do Tell me right now baby Tell me right now baby, baby

Tag List;

@mothermercuryy @mmmmmitslikeadiseaseson

[xsilver-wings]

SHIPPING INFO // answer the following for your muse(s) so people know how shipping works on your blog .

REPOST. don’t reblog .

what’s your OTP for your muse?:  

So far none. :O I’m still getting Xia out there, I feel. So. We’re getting there, hopefully, ahaha. 

what are you willing to rp when it comes to shipping?:  

I’m pretty open to anything. Idk how great I am at smut tho tbh, but like, I’m at least willing to get that far. The only kink I have a problem with is the whole daddy kink because it creeps me tf out sorry. I can’t. But other than that, I’m open to anything — even some taboo stuff, but it really depends on the situation I think. 

how large does the age gap have to be to make it uncomfortable?: 

Gotta be older than eighteen, but other than that, age gaps aren’t that big of a deal. Although, younger muses than Xia might take a bit longer to form if only because like she might be like “You are a child!” When they’re like only three years younger than her. Haha, BUT THAT DOESN’T MEAN THE SHIP CAN’T SAIL. SO COME AT ME. 

are you selective when shipping?: 

I... I say I am only because like, man, I’ve been burned before? I’ve jumped into ships without roleplaying them out first and have been incredibly disappointed. You know how characters kind of form themselves as you write them? Well, that character formed in a way that just didn’t work properly with the other character, but the other person couldn’t see it and I ended up being so miserable with the ship that I just got rid of the character because I just couldn’t handle it tbh. (of course, this was on a forum rp and there was no multi-shipping or anything like that, you know? So like. The character was stuck and I’m too nice of a person to be like “hey these two don’t go together let’s not.” Especially because the other person really liked the ship. I felt so bad omg.) 

However, with that long ass paragraph out of the way, I am addicted to shipping and I freaking love it and like COME AT ME WITH ALL THE SHIPS PLS. 

how far do steamy moments have to go before they’re considered ns.fw?:  

Hmn. I mean like. If they’re getting intimate and are probably getting or on their way to getting naked, seems pretty ns.fw to me. At least, enough to be tagging it. 

who are other muses you ship your muse with?: 

Uhm. Not really? I’m still getting her out there and interacting with lots of people. Xia has a budding ship tho w/ Garrett! They’re dorks. It’s great. But that’s it thus far. 

does one have to ask to ship with you?:  

Yes, please. I’m okay with like crushes and ish like that that aren’t pre-planned, in fact, I think those are cute. However, please come to me if you wanna ship our characters! If the chemistry is right, then I’m probably shipping them as well ahaha. 

how often do you like to ship?:

uh. all the freaking time. I. Love. Shipping. I love it. So much. I am addicted to the feels. Give me angsty ships. Give me fluff. Give me everything! I am an addict. 

are you multiship?: 

I am. Come to me with your ships peeps. 

are you ship obsessed or ship more-or-less?: 

I think obsessed is too light of a word. I love to ship. But our characters have to have some natural chemistry in our writing for it to happen, that’s all. 

what is your favorite ship in your current fandom?:  

I mean. For this fandom, I don’t really have one yet. I’ve got a video of all my fave OTPS from other fandoms tho, lol. Hopefully, as time goes on, I’ll add some shippy great videos for Xia and others as well. :)

finally, how does one ship with you?:  

Come to me. Say something. If you’re too anxious to be like “Hey, I uh, kinda ship our characters???” (which, tbf, same friend same) then come to me and be like “Hey, uh, what do you think of this scenario???” That’s usually how most of my ships happen. Putting them into a scenario that just kind of works with their chemistry and the characters sort of ship themselves. I’m fine with say like your character kissing mine or like confessing their love if you want to even try that. Because that doesn’t immediately indicate a ship, but it could very well be the start of something great. And if I like it and my character likes it, I’ll be coming to you like ‘DUDE SO LIKE WHAT IF THIS HAPPENS *insert horribly angsty plot here*” because it’s always angsty shit i’m horrible to my characters. 

TAGGED BY :  @woeblades TAGGING:  @dionsblood and like other people yo?

ps. like. I’m so weird about tagging people? There are only a few I tag because I’m like. Idk. Are we close enough to be tagging? HMU if you would be okay with me tagging you in things like this. because. Yo. I will straight up do it. Also, side note. I love being tagged so thank you for tagging me (and also other people feel free to tag me as well!). :)

[pumpkinpie59]

rant thing idk:

someone decided to get nasty with me during a discussion about masaya on amino ...

them: His personality is unrealistic because they didn't give him any character flaws which is why to me he was not an interesting character

me: no character flaws? dislikes humanity, can get jealous, keeps his personal life a secret and therefore has few friends, etc. the only reason we don’t really see his main flaws is because the series is from ichgo’s pov so we see things how she sees them. she sees masaya as a kind and caring individual, so we don’t see all the nitty gritty stuff. also it’s been shown that he works rlly hard to be “perfect” bc that’s what people expect of him. he liked ichigo because he felt like he could be himself. sorry, but i do not see how he could be unrealistic or uninteresting :/

them: I don't remember him ever getting jealous always accepting ichigo's being late all the time ,he always protects her and senses when she is in danger , never one got mad at her, acts to perfect which if it is in her prove to , he would be just as manipulative as kisshu , he felt like he could be himself in front of her but yet he still tried to act perfect, therefore he was never his true self in front of her and realistically eventually he would get mad at her for being late all the time and would feel like she's not making an effort to show up despite his secret life , he despises humanity which would mean he would secretly despise her to, there for he had a motive for acting perfect so he was using her all the same

me: he gets pretty jealous in the manga many times. also he says he’s a bit jealous of ryou in the anime. protecting his gf is what he should do as a bf? he got mad at her in episode 4 since she was being secretive and ran off and he was rlly worried about her. he’s definitely not as manipulative as quiche. quiche forces her to do things she doesn’t want to do, while masaya lets her make her own decisions unless he feels uncomfortable (which is a very healthy thing to do in a relationship). if you watch the christmas episode, he admits to his secrets to her and from then on is able to be honest with her when he’s upset or uncomfortable. as for the last few sentences, where does it ever show that he’s mad at her for being late/not making an effort (which he knows isn’t true)??? he said himself that she’s helping him accept humanity and learn to love it. he wasn’t using her, he just saw something in her that he didn’t see in other people and admired her for it and eventually fell for her. that’s innocent and sweet and i don’t understand why you hate him.

them: But he wasn't honest from the very start and neither was she so that would be a toxic relationship. And you got to look at how both were raise I'm not saying it was right but he was raised as a soldier since he was young and properly taught to take everything by force but then you know what he realized his mistakes , I don't ever remember him openly admitting he was jealous of you and ad a boyfriend he also should let he be independent and not so clingy , how wasn't he using her if he was the vessel of deep blue ??and also remember when he turned into dark blue if his love was true enough he would have not at all and she was the first one he went to kill so he was also violent and no better then kisshu ,the problem I have was hes not an upfront and blunt character as kishu and atleast he admitted he was wrong and then he let her be happy though honestly he ended up going to England afterwards then left her alone to be a mew mew to fight by herself

me: okay 1, you started this discussion claiming that masaya was too perfect, and now you’re claiming that he’s toxic. you went back on your claim. 2, masaya wasn’t deep blue. he was his own person, but deep blue only created his body to later be his host body, but masaya was not deep blue himself. 3, masaya and ichigo went to england together. ichigo left him there to help the mews, and he missed her and came back to see her later. he tries to keep in touch as much as he can. and finally 4, not being honest right away is not toxic. they were in the testing phase of their relationship, and thus had to work up to an understanding that both could benefit from. he was able to give her her space so she could grow to accept him and vice versa. that’s healthy. yes, quiche learned, but he still has such a long way to go before he can have a healthy relationship. also, ichigo insisted so many times that he leave her alone. she is in love with masaya and he needs to respect that. even ryou respected that. i don’t hate quiche, but he’s not a great choice for her. at least not at his age. i really don’t want this to get nasty, especially given that i’m a curator and want this to be a safe and enjoyable community, so i would like to respectfully ask you to drop this.

them: You can seem perfect and be toxic it's called narcissism look it up , look in the manga he was his vessel which mean he is deep blue (...) Not being honest is being dishonest , your getting nasty because you don't respect my views and can't handle I have good points , but think what you want you even have in your profile you hate ppl that hate mayasa you must be extremely young and can't handle a good debate but w/e be immature because I have a different opinion and you can't handle it

then they blocked me.

so here’s the thing. i’m not sure if it’s because of my high school background of debate or whatever, but coming up with counter arguments is how debate works? i wasn’t trying to insult them or antagonize them. i was trying to have an intelligent conversation.

this is how i would’ve responded had they not blocked me:

“i wasn’t going to respond because i want this argument to end, but you’re choosing to insult me specifically. i’m 19 and have been active online for ten years now. i never said i hated people *who* dislike masaya. i said i dislike the fact that people hate masaya. completely different. having a good argument means being able to deconstruct a point and giving an alternate point clearly. i literally went to a classical school that taught how to debate. i may not be best at it, but i’m not inexperienced. i’m not trying to be nasty. i’m just trying to respond to your points with my own, which is how debate works. i really wish you’d stop this tho. you’re calling me disrespectful and yet you go and call me immature. this argument is pointless and at this point you’re being hurtful, which is itself a fallacy called ad hominem.”

some more things i wanna say just to get it out of my system: coming up with counterpoints is not disrespecting someone’s opinion. they can believe they have good points. that’s whatever. i believe i have good points. the whole point of a debate is to take an argument and analyze it. tbh i don’t think they were fully reading my points and instead came to conclusions.

“not being honest is being dishonest.” maybe in some cases, but i literally said they were in the early stages of a relationship. idk about anybody else, but say i had a toxic family life as a child. i wouldn’t tell a new partner that right off the bat. i would wait a bit before sharing something so personal so i know it’s safe with that person. same with masaya and ichigo.

“masaya is narcissistic.” i don’t even know how to argue against this because it’s such a ridiculous claim.

tbh tho i kinda wish i had been able to come to some middle ground in the end with a better understanding of each other’s opinions. i keep feeling like i made a wrong choice ... i dislike it when people assume things about me because i honestly want to get along with people. what did i do wrong?

i’m choosing not to tag this