#sorry i havent posted in so long folks but college is tedious and im kinda engaged so life has been busy af

[sup-hoes-its-me]

Crush (Kisame x Reader)

A/N: imagine Kisame having a huge crush on an Uchiha (other than Itachi lmao). Haven’t updated this blog in like 6 months but i had this one unfinished so i added an ending and here you go.

word count: 5364

Boy, was Itachi surprised to see me. Same with Tobi, who faltered under his guise for only a second upon seeing me waltz up to the Akatsuki members in the forest one night. Apparently I was supposedly dead in a massacre years ago, and was banned from entering Konoha ever again as I was “an invader under a clone jutsu”. 

Bullshit. 

I’m Y/N Uchiha, and I was on a mission when the clan massacre took place. I lost my way back to the village and ended up staying for a few years in the Sand village to collect my bearings. Only to find out that when I returned, I’d been presumed dead and then be shunned.

Frankly, I was pissed. I was only from a lower, unimportant branch of the Uchiha, but I knew Itachi personally. I didn’t know what in the hell compelled him to murder his own clan, but it really, really made me angry. I scoured the woods and the deserts and every village I could until I finally stumbled upon Itachi and these weirdos in cloaks. 

I thought they were in some weird cult, and honestly, I wasn’t too far off with that assumption.

Little did I know I would join their “cult” soon after. I got my own ring and cloak and everything. The only thing I lacked was a true partner. I worked a little with everyone. Sometimes I went on missions with Itachi and his partner, other times I went with Sasori or Kakuzu. Whenever I was needed, I went out on Pein’s command.

I did have a preference though, as I was attached to a certain shark man. Right from the start I was drawn to kisame and his gentle, relaxed personality. While the other members of the organization had these overzealous personalities and their insane reasons to fight, Kisame was different.

While he appeared intimidating and frankly quite horrifying, towering over my smaller frame with those gills and sharp teeth, when he opened his mouth to speak, he was strikingly charming. I don’t know how to properly describe it, or this feeling I get when I think of or see him.

My first impression of him was very pleasant though, which could have something to do with my...interest in him.

He was kind when I first joined and offered to help me get adjusted. I looked like a sloppy mess as I trudged into the cave, closely followed by Tobi, who was pressing firmly on my shoulder, despite his friendly nature. I could sense the tension between me and the masked man clearly. 

Apparently, there was something he didn’t like about me. Something that shocked him. I’d never met the man in my life so I wasn’t really sure what to say to the guy. He was a bit too eccentric anyway, so it was probably best he didn’t want to talk to me.

Immediately I was ushered into a room to speak to a guy with orange hair and quite a few piercings, damn. He was pretty pleased to see me, and after I was forced to tell him of my three chakra natures and my mangekyou sharingan, he demanded I join his cult otherwise I would basically be murdered. 

I didn’t have anything going for me at the time. I was banished from my home, not that I had anything to return to. My entire fucking clan, save for me, Sasuke, and Itachi were dead. I was a strange mix between a rogue and a ghost. I was just going to stumble around, taking odd jobs and living in run down motels for the rest of my life if I hadn’t taken the shot. 

So I joined them. I was asked for my cloak size so a man called Kakuzu could buy it for me. Then, I was given a ring. I would have to wear it all time, blah blah blah. Whatever.

He then called another person into the room, Kisame. The man, whom I soon discovered was incredibly built and tall, entered the office and nodded to his leader politely. 

“I’d like you to show Y/N around the compound and show her to her room. The one beside Hidan and Kakuzu’s,” he commanded curtly, but with such poise and strength. He was meant to a leader, I thought as I observed the redhead out of the corner of my eye. With a wave of his hand, I slung my bag over my shoulder and followed the tall, blue man out of the room into the dark and dank hallway, only lit by a small skylight at the end.

The man shifted in his place once we stopped outside the now closed doors. “I’m Kisame Hoshigaki of the Village Hidden in the Rain,” he introduced shortly, causing a small, grateful smile to touch my lips. At least he had the decency to introduce himself like a normal person. Most people in here seem like they wouldn’t give you the time of day, especially Pein. “It’s always great to meet new members of the Akatsuki, eh.”

“I’m Y/N Uchiha. It’s great to meet you too. You actually seem kinda cool, unlike that Tobi guy or Pein.”

“They grow on you eventually,” he laughed nervously, running a hand through his blue hair. “And...did you say Uchiha? Like Itachi-”

“Yes, that Uchiha. God, it seems like all anyone cares about is my clan.No one gives two shits about me as a fucking person. It’s always sharingan this, fire jutsu that, Itachi this, god damn,” I finished my rant sternly, crossing my arms over my chest. 

“No! It’s not that I really care if you’re an Uchiha or not, I mean, even if you weren't from the clan you’d still be a great ninja I’m sure,” he defended, his grip on his sword tightening and loosening as he worked his way through the explanation. I actually found it quite endearing that he cared this much. “It’s just that I thought Itachi killed his entire clan, is all. Meant no offense to you, little kunoichi.”

“It’s really fine. I was hardly angry with you, really just that Pein guy. Honestly, I only avoided death by sheer luck. Been wandering since then, pretty much alone,” I told him. “Maybe joining you guys’ll be good for me. I’ll get to be around people again, be on a team and all.”

“Better than being alone, right?” His lips curved into a crooked smile, a single fang sticking out over his bottom lip. “But let me tell you, you gotta be pretty careful around here. Some of us aren’t as friendly as others.”

I nodded, agreeing with him. I did appreciate the warning though. Maybe this guy would be my key to getting along with everyone around here. I certainly didn’t want to stick out like a sore thumb. “Well, I’d figure as much. You guys are s-rank rogues.”

“Yeah. I mean, some of us are pretty decent. Konan, Itachi, and Kakuzu are cool,” he told me before he grew a bit serious. 

“Something wrong?” I asked quietly, nudging his arm gently.

“Oh, yep. Just thinking of how to warn you about the others. Firstly, I’d tell you to avoid Hidan at all costs. He’s a serial killer and a pervert. He’s actually in the room next to yours, but he shares it with Kakuzu so you shouldn’t have to worry all that much about a surprise visit.”

I laughed, shaking my head at the imagine of a strange, perverted man creeping the halls at night. It wasn’t exactly a laughing matter, but I wasn’t exactly in the most mundane of situations. “Good to know. I’ll be locking my door at night then.”

“Oh, he’s only one of them. Deidara is an artist, but he’s constantly blowing things up. Explosions nearly everyday. Sasori is the total opposite, but he’s a serial killer too. He turns people he admires into puppets for his strange army. He’s a master of chakra strings.”

I hummed, nodding my head. So far this place sounded like a nightmare, but I’m sure there was worse to come. “Anyone else?!” I questioned, peering up at him to see his nod.

He said this casually, might I add, and I couldn’t believe my ears. “Zetsu, but he kinda lives in the garden. He’s half Venus flytrap and eats dead bodies.” How can a person say that shit so calmly? Like I’d be running for the hills if I saw some weird plant dude eat a body, damn.

I whispered under my breath, just loud enough for him to hear, “Holy shit.”

He laughed loudly, clapping a hand on my shoulder for reassurance. “Don’t think about it too much. As long as you stick by me or Itachi, you’ll be fine.”

I smiled, beginning our walk down the long hallway on my personal hideout tour. Seems like this new life I entered would be quite the adventure. And I already had a friend. 

______________________________________________

Tiredly, I threw myself onto the couch in the living room, right between Kisame and Itachi, neither seemed to mind my abrupt company. The last mission I was assigned to was long, tedious, and exhausting, and I just wanted to drink my goddamn tea. Deidara almost got us all killed with his fucking saliva clay, and I was avoiding him at all costs.

I took a long sip of my mediocre tea and sighed, letting the stream of warmth from the cup waft into my face. Kisame shifted so his arm was slung over the back cushions, his fingers just skimming my shoulder. I didn’t think much of it other than it being a friendly gesture, sinking further back into the couch. My head tilted back so it rested in the crook of his elbow. 

“Tired?” Itachi asked, peering over at me through the corner of his eye.

“More pissed than anything, but yeah,” I replied bluntly. Maybe I wasn’t the best person in the organization to sugarcoat things, and I never lied about how I felt. “Deidara was a pain and Tobi just annoyed me.”

My fellow Uchiha nodded. “As per usual.” He understood the pain of working with a bunch of dumbasses. Not Kisame though. Of course not. Whenever I went on missions with the pair, he was always pretty compliant and a lovely team player. When he fought Gai, I swear I’d never been more impressed with water jutsu in my life.

I closed my eyes peacefully. “At least I get to relax now.” I took another long sip of my tea before placing it on the coffee table in front of me. Then, I curled my legs up on the cushions beside me, leaning most of my body weight against Kisame. Unlike Itachi, he never shied away from physical contact, so I figured he wouldn’t mind.

He didn’t. In fact, he brought his arm down to rest on my shoulders and curl around me. For a split second, I swear I felt my heart beat faster at his affectionate touch. Why? I’m not sure. He was only a friend, one of the best I had. 

“You’re so cold, Kisa,” I whined, poking him in the ribs.

He chuckled. “That’s because I’m half cold blooded, remember?”

“How the hell does that even happen anyway. I never got to ask. Was your mom a human and your dad a shark or-” I questioned, which I quickly realized after I spoke how absolutely idiotic I sounded. Itachi even let out a small huff of amusement, while the man in question only roared with laughter, his free hand going to rest over his eyes.

“No. It’s my chakra reserves. My whole clan has these shark characteristics because of our overwhelming chakra levels,” he explained to me, making me feel even dumber. Of course it was his chakra reserves not some weird beastiality thing. Oh my god. I felt my cheeks turning red, and I prayed that he wouldn’t look down to see. Only, he did, and he proceeded to poke my cheek playfully. “Your face is turning as red as Sasori’s hair, little kunoichi.”

“It’s just hot in here-”

He smirked, flashing those sharp teeth at me. “I thought you said it was cold.”

“Oh, shut up!” I grumbled, burying my face into my hands to hide the furthering blush. This frustrated me to no end because I never grew flustered like this before. Not when I was living in the village, not when I hung out with Deidara or Konan or even Hidan. This was stupid. I needed to get a grip fast.

Itachi shifted on the chair until his weight was lifted. He side-eyed us for a quick moment before looking away and heading for the door. “I’m going to my room. I have to paint my nails.”

“But you just did that yesterday-” Kisame was saying before the door shut across the room and Itachi completely avoided his accusations. He huffed and ran a hand through his hair, something I found he always did when he was thinking or nervous about something. Fine by me. His hair always amused me anyway, with the way it stuck up unnaturally. “Guess he had something to do.”

I sighed and shook my head softly. “I guess so. But you know him. Always so elusive. So mysterious,” I laughed, poking fun at my fellow clansman.

“I’m starting to think that’s an Uchiha thing,” my friend hummed, pressing his finger to his lips in thought.

With a furious shake of my head, I protested, “Come on, Kisa. I’m the opposite of mysterious or elusive. I’m blunt as hell and you know it.” I did not want to be known as another Emo Uchiha with daddy issues. I’d already labeled myself as the cool, fun Uchiha anyway.

Just then, the door flew open, and in entered my favorite Jashinist. His brows raised when he caught sight of us cuddled up on the couch. “Am I interrupting your guys’ date or something?”

Shit. I jumped from my place on the couch, brushing down the invisible dust on my pants. “Nope, definitely not. I was just about to head to my room anyway, Hidan so don’t mind me,” I rushed to defend myself, pushing down the red that was tainting my cheeks. 

A date? What the hell? Kisame and I were only friends, strictly friends. 

I turned to look at Kisame as I walked out of the room to see him pouting, glaring at my tea cup on the coffee table. His cheeks were a faint shade of purple. As I shut the door, slipping past Hidan, we caught eyes. He looked hurt and embarrassed. Just what had I done to upset him? I didn’t want Hidan to make any suggestions about our relationship. I hardly thought that would offend him.

Hidan chuckled as he entered the room,“Ouch! That’s gotta sting, buddy.” He spoke just loud enough that I could hear before the knob clicked shut. What did that dumbass religion freak mean by that?

______________________________________________________

“What the hell do you mean?!” I screeched, only to clasp a hand over my lips when I realized I’d caught the attention of a few passerbyers in the hall. I did not calm down, but let my voice sink to a lower level. The crazy white haired man stared at me, patiently waiting for an answer. I had to refuse. There was no way I couldn’t. “No, I will not go on a date with you, you pervert.”

“But Y/N, listen. You’re hot, I’m smoking...We’d be a good pair-”

“Hidan! No!” I cried. “Sorry to break it to you, pal, but I’m not attracted to you at all.”

“Listen, I just need you there to make this chick jealous, get it? She works at the sushi joint in town, and goddamn is she fucking sexy. I need you to make me look like hot shit,” he finally confessed. I knew he couldn’t possibly be asking me on this date without some sort of advantage for him. He’s known me for years and never implied a romance other than hopeless, filthy flirting.

Frustrated, I shoved on his chest. “You dumb bitch. You just wanna use me to get this common girl? Not a sacrifice this time, huh?”

He shook his head, that wicked smile crossing his lips once again. Rolling my eyes, I listened as he cackled, “Oh, no, I’ll definitely kill her. I just wanna fuck her first.” Not only was that incredibly evil, but just plain disgusting. Hidan was that person that you constantly want to strangle. 

“I really don’t want to help you. I think what you’re doing is degrading and shallow.”

“Oh fuck off, Y/N. As if what you’re doing isn’t just as degrading.”

I turned swiftly to glare at him. I didn’t have a single clue what the fuck he was talking about, and honestly, I didn’t enjoy being accused of such bullshit either. “What the ever-living fuck are you talking about?”

“Like you don’t know. You’ve been leading him on for months now.”

“Excuse me?”

“Sharkboy, you know, the one who’s fucking in love with you.”

Well, that infuriated me. How dare he imply that our friendship was anything more than that! Just as I reached up, grabbing the collar of his cloak to yank him down to my level, fully prepared to scream in his ugly, Jashinist face, the door swung open. 

Also in a humorous way, both our heads turned to see who it was at the  same time, rage radiated from our bodies like fire. Itachi raised both his hands in surrender as he peered at us. “Not to interrupt anything, but Pein wants to see you, Hidan,” he spoke calmly, but I didn’t miss the quirk a smile at the corner of his lips. 

I released his cloak from my iron grip and pushed him away. “What the hell did you do this time, Hidan?”

“Like I know,” he replied grumpily. “We’ll continue this later.”

“No, we won’t,” I snapped as he walked out of the room, throwing the middle finger out as he left. With a sigh, I crossed my arms tightly over my chest. He was a pain in my ass, that's for sure.

Itachi gave me a curt nod before walking out of the room and down the hall. Now that I was alone, my thoughts were shifting. I took a moment to recall what Hidan had said, those things he said about me and Kisame. We were only friends, I thought, ever since I joined the Akatsuki it had been that way. He was my closest companion and we hung out all the time.He never implied that he wanted anything other than what we had.

I took a deep breath and sat down on the edge of my bed. How did I feel about Kisame? He was kind and sweet and listened to my every word. He let me hold him when I cried, and I held him when he was hurt. We had something special.

Was Kisame in love with me?

Did I love him?

__________________________________________

Things were different after I realized I might have feelings for Kisame. I couldn’t look him in the eyes anymore without getting lost in thought. Do I love you, I would question myself over and over again until I forced myself to wake up. Was it worth it to say anything at all? To even think these things and ruin everything? 

I sat back on the couch, my knees pulled up to my chest and my chin resting on my knees, trying to drown myself in mindless conversation when really I couldn’t get him off my mind. I was dying to think of anything else, something to take me away from this hell I’d dug myself into.

And then he sat next to me. Itachi settled himself into the seat beside me and took his tea cup to his lips, taking a long sip of what smelled like green tea. I peered over at him from the corner of my eye, only to look right away when I saw him staring back at me, waiting for me to break the silence. 

He obviously knew I had something heavy on my mind.

“Y/N. What’s wrong?” he asked softly. 

I didn’t reply. I just breathed into the fabric of my pants, burying my nose into my knees. I couldn’t just tell him. I couldn’t let anyone know. Once you tell one person, it’s not a secret anymore. I could trust Itachi, I knew that...it was just so difficult when you’re lost for words.

And as humiliating as it was, a few tears dripped down my cheeks as I kept trying to steady my breathing. I hugged myself tighter into this smothersome ball I’d trapped myself in. Isolation hurt, but the company of a friend hurt even more. I sniffed in a desperate attempt to suck up my tears and pretend it never happened. 

I was an s-rank rogue. I wasn’t supposed to cry over something as silly and dramatic as this. It was pathetic. I’m sure Itachi was thinking the same thing as he watched me fall apart.

“I don’t know what to do, Itachi,” I whispered. 

He was silent, as if waiting for me to continue. I still kept my eyes averted, too embarrassed to see the pity in his eyes, if there was any at all. “I can’t figure out how I feel about him, and it’s killing me. I can’t even look him in the eyes anymore,” whimpered fell from my lips, and I sucked in, my breath hitching. “I’m terrified of losing him.”

“Ah. I see. I’m not the best at giving advice, but I’ve learned,” he paused, and I turned to look at him finally through blurry, salty tears. “If you are this broken about losing him, then that means something. You don’t need him, but you want him terribly.”

“I do.”

“You want to keep him from harm and protect him.”

Nod.

“You look forward to seeing his face when you come back from a mission, and you feel your heart race when he comes back home safe.”

Again, I nodded. I understood where he was going though. “I love him.”

“So tell him.”

“When?”

“When it’s right.”

“Why do you always speak in riddles? Dammit,” I joked, wiping away the last of my tears on my cheeks and at the corners of my eyes. He sighed, taking another sip of his drink. He’d done a good job, comforting me. Even though he said he was terrible at advice, I’d consider that a fine job. 

I stood from my spot. “You’re going now?”

“No time like the present, Itachi. You’ve given me the nerve and I can’t let that go.” Sadly, I was not able to do as a wished. Deidara burst into the room, his eyes wider than usual. He glanced from Itachi to me, and it was obvious he’d broken some sort of tension between us. He looked frantic though, almost scared. 

I spun around to face him, my hair swinging over my shoulder and the color draining from my cheeks. All the courage I had was gone. It was replaced with curiosity. “Dei? What’s wrong?”

“Pein wants you, Tobi, and me on a mission right away. We leave in five minutes,” he informed me quickly before leaving without shutting the door.

 I let my breath escape from my lips, and my heart to sink in my chest, heavy like a rock in the ocean. I turned to Itachi for a moment, only to see him frown and shake his head. For a brief moment, I held all the courage in the world. Not the same courage you have to muster to fight another shinobi or the courage you hold between your grinding teeth as you get stitches. 

No, this bravery was different. I had a feeling I wouldn’t find it in me again.

___________________________________________________

We came home from the emergency mission nearly a month later. It turned out to be much trickier than we initially expected. The entire trip nearly cost us our lives, as I’d had two near-death experiences and Deidara one. My cloak was staining with blood many times, and I don’t think a hundred washes could get the faint brown stains out.

When I finally came back to the cave, I practically collapsed in my bed after tossing my dirty cloak to the floor and pulling my hair from the ponytail tugging at my scalp. Finally, my own mattress, my own room, my own bathroom. I just wanted to crawl into the sheets and not come out for a year. 

Unfortunately, I was not given the chance to rest when a soft knock came from my door. I swore, if it was Tobi or Deidara, I would slaughter them. I rolled over so my face was buried in my pillow. “Yes?!” I shouted, although it was muffled by the cushion. “It it’s you Tobi, leave me the fuck alone!”

The heavy wood door creaked open, scratching the floor as it slid along the torn floor board. “Actually, it’s Kisame. I can come by some other time if you-”

“No. no. Come in. I haven’t seen you in forever," I told him from my place on my bed, already scorching over a bit so he would have room to sit. He was a pretty big guy after all. I wondered how he could possibly be comfortable in the tiny beds Kakuzu gets for the organization. 

He entered my room quietly, his eyes searching the room anywhere but on me. He seemed just a bit shy or intimidated which was definitely not like Kisame. He wasn't afraid of many things. 

"You okay?"

He shook his head, snapping out of whatever place he zoned out to. "Yeah, I'm totally fine. Just worried about you is all."

"Worried about me? Why?" I asked with a bit of a smirk. After all, I was one of the only remaining Uchiha, and I had a bit of a special gift as far as kekkei genkai goes. "I can handle myself just fine, Kisa."

He smiled weakly and nodded. "I know you can. I know. You're almost better than me-" I glared which made his smile grow toothily, his fangs sticking out over his bottom lip. "It's just that Pein told me that Deidara made a mistake and that it almost cost three members of our team."

"Kisame, it's fine."

"Not really...to me at least."

I waved him over to my bed, the huge empty space I left for him. He hesitantly walked over, and I noticed something was wrong in his stance. He stood nervously, with his fingers running through his hair every now and then. He stood with his back hunched over a bit, something he rarely did. 

“Are you okay? You look kinda sick,” I asked as he sat beside me. He frowned, but didn’t reply so I pushed. “Really, Kisame, you need to talk about something? Uncertainty doesn’t look very good on you.”

He waved offhandedly. “I’ve just been worried. It feels like we haven’t spoken in forever.”

“Well, it’s been a long month away, you’re right.”

At first when I first saw Kisame, I completely forgot about the conversation Itachi and I had before I left for my mission. Supposedly Kisame was in love with me, that’s what Hidan said at least. And I was beginning to think I loved him too. I’d never been in love before, nothing serious at least. I’d dated when I was younger, but for short times with the wrong people. Kisame just seemed right for me, as cliche as that sounds. 

As I looked up at him, sitting in the bed beside me, thoughts rushed into my mind. The fast that he looked incredibly handsome, even though he had a deep frown and sadness etched into features. He radiated a sort of warmth that I missed on my trip. 

Was this the right time to tell him? I had no idea. I just knew that I wanted him. 

I was just so afraid, and no matter how much Itachi's words had encouraged me, I couldn't open my mouth to tell him. I didn't have too many weaknesses but this one really had me struggling. 

"So-"

"Uh, yeah-"

I shook my head and bit my lip. "Sorry. Sorry. You first."

"Listen, Y/N. I realized something while you were on your last mission. It's been eating at me for a couple weeks now and I- well shit. I don't fucking know," he sighed, pressing his hand to his head and groaning. He ran his fingers down his face, his eyes once again trailing up to awkwardly stare at me.

"Kisame, whatever it is, I promise it's okay."

"I just...well, I never want you to leave me again. I hate the thought of you leaving with those idiots and dying without me there to try and save you. I don't want you out of my sight because one of those times will be the last time I ever see you, and shit that scares me."

Oh. Wow. I wasn't expecting that. I knew he was nervous about me leaving, how can he not be. It's easy to die out there when things go wrong. But his concern was different than anyone else's. Hell, Itachi was my cousin and he didn't worry so much about me.

I looked away, eyes averted to the ground nervously. I was embarrassed. No one said those things to me. To have someone care so much about me made me feel sick to my stomach. I pressed a shaky hand to my abdomen and let out a deep breath. 

I muttered, "Kisame, why…"

"Y/N, you don't get it. I care about you. You're so strong and dedicated and special, and-fuck." He paused. I still was too afraid to look at him. This entire situation didn't seem real. There was no way that my feelings for him were reciprocated. "You know, you're so nice but damn do you make this hard to talk about."

"Before I went on my trip, I was talking to Itachi, and he gave me some advice. Unfortunately before I could act on what he told me, Pein took me away," I confessed quietly, taking my time to explain so I could muster up some courage. I was an Uchiha, not some little bitch. Come on. Again, I explained, "I had a lot of time to think about what I would say and how I would do it. This is the only scenario that didn't play out in my head. They were mostly negative ones, I have to admit."

My smile was lopsided and I had to contain the shivers going through my body. "I guess what I want to tell you is that I love you," I confessed and a weight was lifted off my shoulders immediately. "We've been friends for so long and I couldn't stand laughing with you and talking to you and fighting alongside you acting like this is still  just friendship."

"Funny. I was thinking the same thing."

We both smiled for a moment at each other, just too happy to reply. Things turned out much simpler than I thought they would, and I felt my heart swell with happiness. He loved me back and that’s all I could ask for. Sure, it would be difficult to keep up our relationship with the business we’re in, but we would make it work.

A/N: Yeah, this one is kinda shitty. I couldn’t think of an ending at all. Sorry to all Kisame lovers.