#sorry i don't know what i should tag this spiral im going down as

[liliavalley]

had to remind myself of what he actually does in the series. crazy how im about to ignore all this

whoops. still thinking about colour show swk.

[pleasuretrade]

alright i said i wasn't gonna write this and i'm not actually going to but here is almost 3k words of PI Gale and Muscle for Hire Bucky, pretty much entirely ripped from The Nice Guys (2016). this will never be a real fic bc im too lazy to invent a mystery. u dont need to have seen the nice guys

rating: mature (no porn sorry) pairing: gale cleven x john egan but they don't actually get together bc it's not a full fic. just use ur imagination tags: 70s au, private investigator gale, muscle for hire john, violence, guns, john doing violence on gale but they're cool about it, curt is there

“Thanks, Mr. Egan,” she was saying, tucking a lock of hair behind her ear, blown out of place in her convertible, obviously a rental, “you’re really giving me peace of mind.”

”Call me Bucky.” He flipped through the money in the envelope. Ten bucks short. Jeez. Was he really gonna mention it? What was ten bucks? He should be above that. He was doing this work to feel like a useful member of society. To feel good about himself for once. But he had to make a living right? If he did everything cheaper than cheap he’d be broke. “You’re short.”

”What?”

”Short. On cash. Ten bucks.”

”Oh,” she said, searching the floorboard with shaking hands. She retrieved her little yellow purse, procured a tenner. “Sorry. Here.”

”Thank you.” John tucked the bill into the envelope, and the envelope into the inside chest pocket of his sheepskin. He pulled out his notepad and pen, flicking his old notes over the little spiral. “Can you describe the guy for me again?”

”Uh, yeah. Six foot maybe? Blond. Thin, but not scrawny. Prettyboy type.”

 John’s pen scribbled across the page. “And you said you got his address?”

 She rummaged through her purse again, snatching out a crumpled sticky note. “Here. Thanks again,” she hesitated, smiled a smile that didn’t reach her eyes, “Bucky.”

“My pleasure, Christine.” John beamed at her from behind his aviators.

-

 He’d knocked about ten times. Rang the bell twice. “Gale Cleven?” he called, finally hearing a rustle from behind the door.

”Who is it?” came the muffled reply.

”Messenger service. Looking for a Gale Cleven.”

 The door opened; blond hair, six foot, prettyboy. Bucky swung a right hook into his nose. The guy, Gale, stumbled backward, planting his ass onto a little bench he had in the hallway there.

”What the fuck—“ he spat, angry but dumbfounded. Blood was already pouring from his nose, his hand held up like he didn’t know whether to grab his face or defend himself, and he was looking up with a confusion that looked too handsome on him.

”We’re gonna have a little chat.” John grabbed his arm, and finally the guy started fighting back. He wasn’t small, and he was fit, John would give him that, but John had him outmuscled by profession and outsized by nature. It took just a little leverage to flip him and toss him across the floor, into the living room. The guy rolled and landed on his side, and then recovered gracefully onto his ass. He pressed his back against the wall. John took three long strides, quickstep, and planted his bootheel firmly on his new friend’s balls and the ball of his foot against his dick. Those slacks were too tight, he could tell right where everything was. It was a little obscene.

”Alright,” Gale froze, holding his hands up in surrender. “Calm down. We can chat.”

 John slipped his brass knuckles out of his pocket, fit them across his fist in a little show for Gale. “Stop looking for Christine.”

 Gale raised his eyebrows, but he smiled. John didn’t like that smile. Or, well, he liked it, but it wasn’t really conducive to getting his job done. It was a charming smile, lined with blood that still seeped down his cupid’s bow. Dangerous. Gale Cleven, huh? “Fine.”

”Fine?”

”Fine.”

”What do you mean fine? Just like that? Aren’t you a PI? Aren’t you looking for her? You’re just gonna give up like that, no questions asked?” Something didn’t match up here. Guy with tight slacks, fancy house, and a dangerous smile, and he was just gonna agree to stop looking for his target? John didn’t buy it. He shifted his foot, just to remind Gale where it was.

”I’m not looking for Christine.”

”You’ve been asking the whole city about her.”

“Then maybe I already know where she is.”

 Alright, now John was getting annoyed. “I’m not sure you’re getting my message—“ John presses his foot down and suddenly his ankle twists and he topples to the ground before he knows what’s happening. Little shit’s hands were fast. Maybe John wasn’t the only one here who knew how to fight dirty.

 Gale was up and bolting to a nearby kitchen counter, reaching into a breadbox that John just knew had a gun inside, and now that he was up to speed, now that he knew what he was dealing with, he didn't skip a beat. He was on him in a second, knocking the little revolver out of his hand with a perfectly aimed brass-knuckled punch to the wrist. Gale grunted as the gun went clattering across the floor. He immediately went to dive for it but John didn’t let him, grabbed him by the belt and shirt and tossed him against a cabinet. He went down heavy.

”Wily, ain’tcha?” John said, surprised that he was breathless. He hadn’t had this much fun in a long time. “Now I really don’t think you’re getting my message, Gale.”

 Gale flipped onto his back, staring up at John, and boy if that wasn’t a sight. Too handsome for his own good, sure, yeah, but now that John knew he could almost hold his own? Now that John was intrigued? Oh, he was just his type.

”I got your message,” Gale claimed, hands up again like it would work a second time, “I got it.”

”See I really don’t believe you. You’re obviously not scared of me, even though you should be, and you’re obviously hiding something, otherwise you wouldn’t look so damn smug. And you really think—“

 Gale twisted quick across the floor, kicking off and going for that god damn gun again, and John dove down with a knee to his back. This guy was an absolute menace. “Alright, okay, I give,” Gale said, breathing hard under John’s knee. The blond hair at the base of his neck looked soft. John wanted to bury his hand in it. Instead, he wrenched one of Gale’s arm behind his back.

”I just don’t trust you, Gale. You haven’t given me a lot to work with, y’know?” John pressed his arm at just the right angle to make Gale really tense up. Now he was getting what John was saying.

”No, no, I get it, I’ll drop Christine, alright? She was a lead on a case looking for someone else, and I’ll drop it, I’ll find another way.”

”You know, you remind me of a guy I used to know named Buck. Spitting image. Only he was a lot smarter than you, right? He woulda taken my message the first time.“ Gale was much easier on the eyes than Buck, but no one had to know that. “Now make sure you tell your doctor, you’ve got a spiral fracture of your radius—’

”Nonono,” Gale said, still a little too calm for John’s taste. But that could be fixed.

“Deep breath,” John instructed.

 Gale kicked out beneath him. “No. No!”

 John leaned into his hold, twisting and pushing hard and fast.  Familiar resistance, and then give. Gale screamed, convulsing under John’s knee, lifting his hips in an instinct to crawl away. Much better.

 John stood, marched across the room and grabbed the gun, dropped the bullets out of the cylinder. Gale was panting on the ground, arm still behind him and twisted just a little wrong, back arched in pain. “Fuck,” he grunted.

”Alright, you have a good day, Buck!” John sang, waving a hand behind him as he left in case Gale could see him. What a guy. Fun job. John would have done it for ten bucks off, honestly.

 Outside, crossing the sidewalk to get back in his car, John was waylaid by a shorter man, eyeing him up and down. “You a friend of Gale’s?” the man asked. He must have seen John leave Gale’s house. Wouldn’t do to have him suspicious enough to check John’s license plate as he left.

”Yeah, yeah. Colleagues more than friends, really,” John lied, getting into his car but leaving his door open. He put on his most winning smile. The man smiled back.

”Alright. Name’s Curt, I’m Gale’s roommate.” Curt held out his hand and John took it.

”Nice to meet ya, Curt, real nice.”

”Nice to meet you too, uh…” Curt was waiting for his name. John wasn’t going to give it.

”Have a nice day now, Curt!” John chirped, shutting his door and putting the car in drive.

-

 John eked his way through the door between partygoers waiting in line. “Ay, Bucky!” the bouncer greeted, patting him on the back.

”Hey, Jim, how’s it goin’?” John asked, turning to walk backward a few steps.

”Gonna be a busy night, might wanna have your earplugs ready.”

”Always do!”

 John bounded across the club, through the door in the back and up the stairs. There was a guy up there, looking around like he was lost. Probably already drunk and confused before the show even started. He had on a smart red suit, too nice for this place.

”Club’s downstairs, sir, up here’s a private residence.”

”Oh, man, you got like an apartment or something up here?” red suit asked. Jesus. Take a hint, pal.

 John walked to his door, unlocking it. “Yeah, or something. Really, you’re not supposed to be up h—“

 Red suit guy grabbed the back of John’s head and smashed it into his door. The bolt, unlocked as it was, ripped through the doorframe. The guy tossed John inside and he landed hard on the floor, suddenly and vividly empathizing with Gale. Red Suit wasn’t taller than him, but he was a hell of a lot thicker. He grabbed John by the hair and got right in his face, ”Where is Christine?”

 John tried to shake his head, ended up just wincing. “I don’t know a Christine, sorry.”

”Come on, you cocksucker, don’t play dumb with me.” Red Suit bounced his head off the ground and sent the world tilting and whooshing around John for a minute there.

”If you don’t want me dumb, concussing me ain’t gonna help.”

 Red Suit shook him by the hair and John finally grabbed his arm, considering his options. “Tell me where the fuck Christine is.”

”Look, I’d love to help, but you’ll have to tell me who Christine is.”

”Fuck you.” Red Suit pulled up and John followed only to keep his scalp intact. He threw John against the arm of the couch. It winded him, knocked his breath right out of him, but it was a tactically bad choice for Red Suit. John had a double barrel shotgun under that couch.

”Okay, alright,” he gasped, “let’s just reason with each other here.” John slipped onto the ground, crouching and putting on a show of catching his breath. He coughed for good measure, too. “You’re looking for Christine, and I,” John curled in on himself, looking discretely under the couch to make sure the gun was still there, “I don’t know who you’re fucking talking about.” John reached under the couch and in one smooth motion had pulled the gun out and rolled onto his back. He trained the shotgun up at the guy, who produced a tiny handgun from his pocket. John laughed. “Ohh, buddy, it’s not even a contest.”

 John fired the first shell as a warning shot several feet to the left, lightning quick, no time to think to aim and taking out his TV and the radio on top of it. Well. Fuck. Sacrifices had to be made sometimes. Red Suit grimaced, but started backing up to the door, gun still trained on John. John let him. He knew he’d see him again, but that was a problem for another day. He waited until he heard steps going back down the stairs.

“Fuckin’ jagoff!” John yelled after him.

 Now who the fuck was that and who was he working for? And who the hell was this Christine girl, really? And why did one deal with her sic some goon on him? And how the hell did John keep that goon from coming back with his friends? He slid the shotgun back under his couch. Looked at his poor TV and radio. “Fuckin’ jagoff,” he repeated under his breath.

-

 The gym was busy on a Friday night. John made his way through the hallway, past the vending machines and lockerroom doors and into the boxing gym. The place was crawling with people, mostly men jacked to the tits and sweating like pigs. John smiled to himself. This was probably what his heaven would look like. Including the blond currently watching his friend Curt in the ring.

 Curt shuffled back and forth, sparring some guy without really trying. Warming up, probably. Gale sat in a metal folding chair outside the ring, looking up. Tight slacks, tight t-shirt, arm in a cast and held against his chest. He watched Curt, sometimes giving him a note, but mostly just watching.

 John walked up and stood beside his chair, watching too for a few seconds. Curt’s nose looked like it had probably been broken before. John wondered how Gale’s was faring after the other day. A sweet little vivid memory of wide eyes and a bloody nose looking up at him prompted John to finally look down at the top of Gale’s head. Gale looked up, and at the same moment Curt noticed.

”Ay! You’re that fuck that beat up Gale!” Curt yelled, pointing at him with an entire boxing glove.

”Sucker punched,” Gale corrected, shooting him a glance. He looked back up at John. He had a sweet little black eye, courtesy of John himself. “You got a lot of guts coming here,” he said. Quiet. Calm. Deep. Almost vacant. A different person than John had met just three days earlier. He looked back at Curt. “‘S alright, Curt, keep goin’.”

 Curt obviously didn’t want to, but reluctantly listened, turning back to his opponent but glancing over constantly.

”So what, you come to break my other arm?” Gale asked, watching Curt and his partner slide across the ring.

”Nah, maybe I just like ya, Buck,” John said, watching Curt too.

 Gale tsked.

-

 They sat in a plush booth seat at the diner, Curt and Gale on one side and John on the other.

“So you really beat people up for money?” Curt asked, leaning forward with much interest.

”Yup.”

”Could you beat up this guy I know? Name’s Lawrence, he’s a real—“

”Curt,” Gale cut him off.

 John smiled, holding his hands out in placating innocence. Gale glanced at his hands. Raised his doctored arm onto the table to rest it there. John almost felt bad about it by now. “Got a favor to ask, Buck.”

“My names Gale,” Gale said.

“I know what your name is. My name’s Bucky, by the way.”

 Curt made a squawk of confusion. Gale squinted at him. Raised his good arm to cradle his face momentarily. “You call me Buck, and your name is Bucky.”

”Alright, well, not legally, but that’s what I’m called. If you don’t like Bucky, you’re free to call me ‘sir.’” John grinned at him, and the corners of Gale’s mouth honest to god twitched.

”Okay, Bucky. What do you want?” Gale drawled, sipping from a glass of coke.

“I want you to help me find Christine.”

“You want me to help you find the girl you made me stop looking for?”

“Sure. Is that a problem?”

“You broke my goddamn arm.”

“Yeah, and I’m real sorry about that, alright? But look, Buck, I got some money, I can pay. I’ll hire you like an honest to god client.”

“It’s gonna cost you a pretty penny, Bucky.”

 Curt looked back and forth between them like watching a tennis match.

 John had anticipated as much, and he pulled out an envelope with five hundred big ones in it, handed it over. “That enough?”

 Gale eyed him. Took the envelope. Counted it. Eyed him again. Nearly smiled. “So why’re you suddenly interested in finding her again? She owe you money for jumping me or something?”

 John laughed. “Nah. See, someone else is after her, and now they’re after me because they think I’ve got some kind of connection with her, when I don’t. All I know about her is her name, what she looks like, and that a few days ago she was riding around in a rented convertible. Now, I know it’s not you lookin’ for her, ‘cause I made sure of that, but I think whoever it is is gonna be a big thorn in my side until I get it sorted out.”

 Despite the prickle John had drawn out of him, mentioning that he’d made sure and all, Gale looked interested. Amused, really. “Hired muscle, asking me for help finding his own client.”

“Well, she’s just the beginning, now isn’t she? I got a feeling this goes deep, Gale,” John winked, “real deep.” So he was flirting. Sue him.

 Gale’s face cracked into a smile. It reminded him of the one he’d seen when they’d met, all bloody nosed and charming. Gale was excited. That made John excited, too. Gale hid it by looking down at his coke though, like he was bashful all of the sudden. Cute. “Alright, Bucky. It’s a deal.” He tucked the envelope into his pocket, took a drink of his coke, held out his hand. Bucky took it. Gale shook.“‘Cause I already know where she is.”

 Son of a gun.

-----------------

sorry this will never turn into a whole fic but please feel free to whisk it away and make it your very own fic if u want. i honestly just wanted to write john breaking gale's arm like in the nice guys bc i have nice guys brainrot forever and am mentally <3 disturbed

[luxrayz64]

hey u like saw. are the sequels good. i usually let tumblr decide what i'm gonna watch next bc it has yet to let me down and these days it seems to really fucking want me to watch the rest of the saw movies. i don't even know how many there are but they've had 20 years to make them so i assume a lot bdbjsjs

also sorry if this ask annoys u and such feel free to ignore me. but also pls know i am aware about the existence of search engines it's just those usually get me to a screenrant article instead of A Real Opinion From A Real Person, and i've been told ppl enjoy talking abt things they like so here i am

sorry for the endless rambling thank u for presumably reading it all lmao <2

OH im so happy youre asking i saw yr tags on that other post and thought long and hard about giving unsolicited advice but decided against it

so. saw sequels are kind of a mixed bag. quality kind of varies movie to movie. for the most part they're all still fun! and i do recommend most of them. key word is most of them

there are ten movies currently and an eleventh set to release next year. the saw series is very story focused, and the first seven are all direct sequels to each other. you cannot skip any of the first seven. unfortunate, because saw 3d (the 7th one) sucks ass in a way that should be studied. but it is the conclusion to that story and it is pretty funny if you can get past the misogyny

the eighth and ninth movies (jigsaw and spiral) you can definitely skip. jigsaw also sucks but not even in a funny way + its in a really weird timeline spot so everyone kind of just ignores it. spiral is good from what I've heard but its a standalone spin off. saw x is also not required viewing, it's a prequel that takes place between saw i and saw ii but it is genuinely one of the best entries in the entire series so it's definitely worth watching.

i think you should at least watch ii and iii, and keep going if you enjoyed them. saw 1-3 makes up its own trilogy pretty much, wraps up almost everything in a nice bow. it's the last movie the original writer worked on and im pretty sure he intended it as a finale.

the following movies are pretty fun still and continue on the narrative in an interesting way, they retcon the established lore bc of course they do but they do it in an interesting way. hoffman is my favourite punching bag i want to put that man under a microscope. and saw vi is like genuinely one of my favourite movies ever. my favourite traps in the series besides reverse beartrap are in saw v. so like there is still a lot to love past saw iii! but you can stop there if you don't feel a need to keep going. if you can make it through saw iii you can definitely make it through the rest of the series, that's about where they hit their stride in terms of like sfx, gore/traps etc.

tldr they are FUN!!!!! not always good but they are fun. so so so much to unpack about them. its been a year ish since I watched them and i still feel a little insane about john kramers little murder cult

[lovelyhan]

hi! <3 i'm tomo, i've been meaning to message for awhile but i tend to forget things and put them off + i was confused navigating through tumblr gfkghfdk. i hope you don't find this long message weird! I just finally sat down and worked through my shyness. that being said, i just wanted to tell you that your fic "meet cute of the century" on ao3 was what triggered me to be a carat! i binged your genshin fics at a point and then saw you post for SEVENTEEN. I heard of them and their songs but not enough to stan. More like a casual listener and i only knew S.coups from his alpha leader rep. Because you impressed me so much with your genshin i decided to give it a go too. The fact that I know 0 of Wonwoo or SVT but you manage to make me curious is so damn impressive. So i searched up wonwoo and svt and spiralled from there. I meant to leave praise and a comment bc literally, shit was going down hill and that fic and svt? it made life a lil easier knowing theres this pocket of space i could giggle, watch 13 men cause chaos, find the chillest fandom, and enjoy their fics. But my dumbass rushed and spiralled since reading, i had a hyperfixation that didn't bookmark your fic so i was trying to remember the fic. Luckily i began to use tumblr, get familiar with tags, find more fics and THEN SAW MEET CUTE OF THE CENTURY IN ONE OF THE TOP POSTS. So here I am, months since reading your fic, its embarrassing ik, and i just wanted to let you know that your writing is responsible for my brainrot and stanning svt <3 i thought i was done with my kpop era and stanning but nope! thank you so muchhh, kai! I hope you're having the bestest day. I hope you didn't find this weird TT^TT this is why i become shy, cause im concious that my excitement is weird. I'm working on remembering things more, sitting down and taking time to appreciate works instead of rushing into a rabbit hole lol. If it does weird you, feel free to ignore! I just thought you should know you turned someone into a carat <3

now i'm sorry i'm just replying to this bc i haven't checked my inbox since october but this is so 😭⁉️ it's not weird at ALL and i do think i see you around on ao3 leaving kudos on my fics, so it's nice to know you found me here too! can relate to accidentally falling into the svt rabbit hole bc if soulmates were real, they'd be mine 😞

thank you for telling me all this 🥹 i appreciate you so much 🤍

[lnkedmyheart]

Sorry, genuinely trying to help but I'm aware that completely out of the blue, unsolicited advice generally doesn't work and people need to reach their own conclusions. No pressure to respond. I don't remember what I wrote but I think my intention was to convey how aggravating for people's mental health it is to feel powerless and how detrimental it is to focus on things that will exacerbate those feelings. There are only a limited amount of things that are within our control and other people's bad takes are usually completely outside our sphere of influence. We know they're wrong and that makes us feel powerless so we want to change them, so we try to address bad takes, but we can't change other people so we keep seeing the same bad takes, so we feel more frustrated and more powerless than we started out. Sometimes we end up creating negativity bubbles with other people who also hate the same takes we do and end up feeding each other's negativity spirals. In the simplest words, it's a cycle that isn't beneficial for us and it's unproductive (in terms of mental health not capitalism. In the sense that our actions make us feel worse long-term instead of better). A productive approach would be shifting our perspective to within our sphere of influence and what we can control. We have influence over how we react to things and how we feel about stuff, which is why focusing on the things we like and talking about why we like them makes us feel good because we're in control. It's productive in terms of mental health, it's rewarding, makes other people feel good, and people can bond over shared interests. This type of approach is is also more likely to sway people into seeing things from our perspective. Anyway, I just sent you that ask because I agree with a lot of your posts and I think they're even better when you're actually talking about the things you like. I don't know if you've noticed but you've got a ton of people dumping their negativity in your asks, and I can't imagine how exhausting that must be. Also I have an insufferable need to talk about ways to manage and improve mental health.

I'm cool with people being negative in my asks. I am of the opinion that you should be allowed to dump your negativity into a post on your blog (not in character tags because I dont wanna insert negativity into character tags) because otherwise it keeps building up inside you. I like Oda a lot more now that I have people who seem to share my frustration with Oda's characterization in the fandom and the consequence it has had on the way Dazai is viewed by people. And I have a healthy life outside socmed in general so I'm never really bogged down by the frustrations of bad socmed takes. Like, these are 2d drawings on a screen, if it really starts getting to me more than I can stand I just log off and walk my dog or go out for lunch with my friends.

I'm glad you like my takes, but I am not gonna stop talking about things or takes that annoy me because I NEED to talk about them so that I stop feeling like Im alone with that opinion. Because I'm tired of having to make my blog a place for only others to enjoy. Its a place where I say whatever I want as long as I dont hurt anyone or their feelings.

The mental health thing when it comes to Dazai takes are more because the antis keep invading positive spaces to drag him or chuuya or skk or aku or whatever they decide to dump on that week.

[atinywhore]

I knocked on every door

kang yeosang x fem reader

genre: honestly, mostly angst with a splash of smut at the end.. but its good smut, in my royal opinion, so don't worry

word count: 3540 (most of it is angst lmao)

warnings: pleasure dom vibes (yeosang ofc), oral (fem receiving), HICKIESSS, multiple orgasms ;) unprotected sex (use a condom dummies), some trauma elements idk how to describe it but you'll see hopefully, angst to fluffy ending bc im a softy who needs happy endings..

an: This is part two to my besties yeosang request! This is my first time doing angst really and I'm happy with how it turned out. P.S. I didn't really edit this.. so I do apologize if there are any big issues, there shouldn't be but if there is my bad, its literally midnight the I'm finishing this and am running off of 4 hours of sleep. OMG, I have nothing against Seonghwa, I would literally shoot someone if they did what I did to him in this fic, so please no hate, he was just the first member that popped into my brain. stop I love him.

be kind and lmk :) please be nice and let me know if I missed any warnings. enjoy my dirty little hoes <3

tag list: @ch0isa99ie @mingigoo @ateezinmymind @wickeddarkness-place @whatudowhennooneseesyou @teezers99

bite me- (pt 1) (pt 2)

~~~~~

He slid himself fully inside, my walls burning with pleasure. “Fuck” the word comes out in a breathy moan directly into his ear. “Holy shit doll.” He flexed his hips and another wave of pleasure burned through me. “Taking me so well.” he drew his eyes away from mine and looked down to where we were connected. Slowing his pumps and filling me as much as he can, repeating the torturous motion over and over until I almost reach the edge, and then he stops.

~

It has been 2 months since that night in the parking garage. It took me over a week to finally peel myself from my bed and actually shower. No matter how hard I tried I could not seem to erase the feeling of his hands roaming my body and how perfectly he seemed to fill me up. It wasn’t until your friends forced you out of your apartment back into civilization. You were at a cafe waiting for your friends when you got a text saying (We are sorry, please don’t hate us. You need this.) Rightfully pissed, you make to leave after seemingly being stood up, you hear a man's voice directly in front of you, “Y/n?” Your vision focuses on the tall and very handsome man now smiling down at you. “Are you y/n?” His cat-like features pulled to reflect the smile now dominating his face. “Yes I am. Do I know you?” Trying not to be impolite but his stature and angular greek like looks are ripping you back to the night you have been trying so hard to forget. It was not this man's fault that he has a similar look to.. You can’t even speak his name in your head or else you’ll crumble right here in this cafe.

His face twists in a concern like manner and you snap yourself out of the spiraling thoughts consuming you. “I’m sorry did you say something?” Feeling a slight blush warm your cheeks, he just plasters that same smile back on, this time a dimple settles on the corner of his left lip.

He never looked at me like that.

“I said I’m Seonghwa. I work with your friends and they have been trying to set us up for a while now I guess. I’m sorry it seems you didn’t know and I don't want to make you feel comfortable. I will just go now and-” Now it's his turn to warm with embarrassment. “No you came all the way here! Sit, we can just talk over a cup of coffee. His cheeks illuminating slightly with the pink still tinting his tan skin. His smile shines even brighter as he takes a seat across from you.

And for almost two months now it has been Seonghwa. We have been inseparable since that fateful day. We might be on the cusp of dating but no matter how many times he brings it up I just can’t say yes. My mind is so clearly set on picking Seonghwa, but, it's my fickle heart that is standing in the way of fully letting him in. He makes me so happy, so it should be the obvious choice of Seonghwa but it’s almost as if Yeosang cast a spell on you. No, fuck him for screwing with my life even after he’s no longer in it.

Your kinda boyfriend Seonghwa was throwing a party and of course you had  to go. It didn’t take you long to get ready and take the elevator down 3 floors to his apartment. As you neared his floor you could hear the slight thumping of a deep bass. As the elevator dinged and opened its doors to the hallway, almost shaking with the music. You turn right and walk down the warmly lit hall close towards my destination. Another right and I’m hit with the stench of weed and alcohol. Dodging the dazed bodies of both men and women to finally reach the heart of the party.

My eyes roamed the crowd, taking in the delightful sight. There’s a young girl swaying her hips in time with the beat, a drink in hand raised above her head. Looking to my left I see two young men, bodies facing one another in an intimate type of way. The taller of the two looked down at his partner with a soft expression of bliss coating his features while his counterpart excitedly shared some story, hands and arms flinging around to better share the experience.

Continuing to scan the crowd I finally see Seonghwa. Squeezing, sliding and ducking, I’m able to make my way through the crowd and reach him. Moving closer to him I wrap my arm around his and he finally turns noticing me. “Y/n! You made it!” He moves his arm causing mine to fall but he leans down and pulls me into a hug. His scent of warm vanilla and coconut rum washed over my senses. I felt the twitch of arousal flicker down to my lower stomach at the pressure of his hands running from my shoulder blades down to finally wrap around my hips.

A chill ran down my spine, but not of pleasure. I can feel the burning of eyes labored onto my back. My body stiffened and my palms began to sweat. Sensing my change seonghwa releases from the hug and sets his focus solely on my face. His brows curl in concern and he places his hands on my shoulders to pull me out of my frozen state.

It can’t be him. He doesn’t know Seonghwa, right?

“Y/n?” Seonghwa shakes my shoulders slightly, finally pulling me out of my state. “Yes hwa?” My voice barely a whisper. I clear my throat and repeat the sentence. “You went all quiet. Are you okay?” His hands move up to cup my cheeks and I can’t help but smile at his comforting warmth. “Yes hwa. Just got lost in thought I guess.” You try to laugh it off but he still seems to be on edge. You move his hands from your face and hold them in yours, “Come on, let’s go get a drink.”

~

A few drinks later and you definitely forgot about the chilling thought of him being here. There was a slight buzz clouding your mind as you and your kind of boyfriend danced within the crowd. You could feel the heat of his body pressed closely behind yours. His hands held a weak grip on your hips, just enough of pressure to keep your ass connected with his pelvis. Swaying sensually to the music with a tall handsome man behind you, a great buzz growing, your mind finally turned off. This feeling enlightened your mind of its troubles and just let you be.

This euphoric feeling did not last long when the chill returned, slithering it’s way down my spine. Shooting my eyes open, I now searched the crowd for the source. Relief started to settle my jumpy body but disappeared when I spotted him.

He looked like a god. Standing in the corner of the room, drink stopped just at his full lips and his darkened eyes met mine from across the room. Stopping the movement of my body as the rush of emotions consumes me. Seonghwa’s grip tightens, encouraging me to keep moving with him. The memory of Yeosang hands grabbing me the same way causes a flare of panic to jolt my system alive. Grabbing Seonghwas hands from my hips while still holding them, I turned to face him, “I’m not feeling so good hwa. I’m going to go home, I think.” Obviously drunk, he whines out a response but I place a quick kiss to his cheek and head towards the front door.

~

I could feel him following close behind me.

His footsteps mocked mine, the heel of his boot clicking against the black and white tile. The sound echoed louder and soon enough there was a hand stopping me by the shoulder. “Y/n.” My breath hitches at the sound of his deep voice. “Please don’t walk away from me again.” He turns me around to face him but my head is locked downward, staring at his shiny black combat boots. With his other hand he hooks a finger underneath my chin and lifts my line of vision to meet his.

Gone were the inky, brooding eyes I’ve come to know and fear, now his eyes shine like two pools of dark honey inviting me into the sweetness. His warm eyes flicker all across my face before landing briefly on my lips once and taking their final place meeting back with mine. Our faces are so close that I can smell the sweet scent of peach, no doubt from the flavor of soju he had been drinking. His thumb gently runs back and forth over my bottom lips as his eyes never leave mine.

Reality hits me like a fucking train. Taking a step back, I break the contact between us and now I’m left with a cold feeling deep deep inside me. His mouth opens to speak again but I hold my hand up to stop him. “What can I help you with Yeosang?” I managed to muster up every ounce of courage I had. He falters at my response. A long silence drags on between us. He’s just staring intently at me, mouth slightly agape and his posture now rigid. “Okay then. Good night Yeosang.” Turning around I continue walking straight, aiming for the elevator directly in front of me. I don’t look back. I press the button and the doors slide open. Entering the old fashioned metal cage-like elevator I finally turn and see him. Standing exactly as I left him. It’s not until the doors are about to close that I see him start forward. It’s too late. The doors have shut and the 5th floor button is already glowing with its destination.

I make it down the long hallway to my apartment, the last and furthest one from the elevator. I kick off my shoes in the entryway and slug my way into the joined kitchen and living room. I open the fridge door and grab my picker of water, setting it on the island behind me. It’s at this point that my mind is no longer thinking. There are only the basic thoughts like the ones for water and sleep. I grab a cup from the cupboard next to me, then pour and gulp the chilled water. The water energizes me long enough to make it to the couch and once my head hits the soft throw pillow, I’m out.

~

I’m jolted from my sleep by a loud smack at the door. I froze, careful not to make a sound. Then a fury of knocks follow the smack. My dazed brain racks itself for some sort of rationalization for the situation. I jump to the thought of Seonghwa. He was pretty wasted, he could be coming up to check on me. My heart does a guilty flip. I get to my feet and head over to the door. The banging has stopped by the time I open the door. The man on his knees before me was not who I was expecting. The sound of me opening the door has him lifting his hanging head. His dark shaggy hair moves in motion with his head. The dark bangs framing his face fall back with the rest of his hair when he is fully looking up at me. The look in his eyes has not changed from when I had just seen him last.

“I knocked on every door.” His rasp almost brought my knees to tremble. “Excuse me?” My words came out weak. “I knocked on every door on this floor to find you y/n.” He closes his eyes and lets his head fall back even further making him look even more like he was carved from stone. He takes a deep breath, holds, and then lets it go slowly, reopening his eyes to look back at me. “I was wrong y/n. Ever since that night you walked away from me, I have not been able to get you out of my mind.” His hand jets up to push the hair falling into his face back. “I don’t understand what you did to me y/n but all I know is I want you. I need you.” He meets my eyes again and they are wild this time, almost as if I can see the thoughts consuming his mind like a wildfire. “Well to quote your own words Yeosang, ‘This was a one time thing. Don’t get it twisted.’ Plus if you couldn’t tell, I’m already seeing someone.” He let out a laugh at the last part of my retort. “Come on y/n, we both know you can’t fully commit to him.” Once again feeling the annoyance that once always accompanied his presence, “And why might that be Yeosang?” He rather slowly gets to his feet, now towering slightly over me, and begins to back us into my apartment.

“You know why y/n. You are just too scared to admit it like I was.” I stop moving, causing him to stop as well. He does not get to come here and treat me like this again. “Fuck off Yeosang. I’m not some toy you can just pick up and play with when you are bored.” A half grin pulled the left corner of his lips up. “That’s not how it seemed to feel last time we were together y/n. Don’t you remember?” The flashbacks playing through my mind cause waves of pleasure to migrate to my stomach and lower. “Oh bite me.” As soon as you said it, you wish you hadn’t. He closed the final distance between you two and he leans in to whisper, “Don’t tempt me doll.” His hot breath fanned down the length of your neck before he stopped right above the last spot he had bitten you. “Y/n, I need to know that you feel the same before we go any further.” My mind whirled from the sleepiness, his confession, his soft lips placing sweet kisses all along my neck and exposed shoulder and my once buried emotions for him resurfacing. Taking a deep breath I pull back from Yeosang. He seems defeated by my movement until I grab his hand. Meeting his eye briefly, I turn to lead him further into my apartment. Walking past the living room and through a tiny hall I stop outside the door to my bedroom. Before I open the door I release his hand and grab him by the face, effectively pulling his head down to my level. “I can’t be another one time thing with you again Yeosang. I won’t be able to pull myself together if it happens again.” A couple tears fell down my cheeks and now it's his turn to hold my face. Wiping my tears away and placing a kiss where each one fell, he looks at my lips and leans his head in to kiss me.

I wish I could say I forgot how soft his lips were, but I can’t. He worked my mouth open slowly for him to let his tongue slide in, deepening the kiss. When he pulls away I find myself fiending more and more, just needing another hit. “Y/n, I’m the biggest fool for ever thinking that you were.” My breath shortened in excitement and hopefulness. I reached behind me and opened the door. Keeping one hand on cupping my face, the other hooked under my knee, urging me to straddle him as he strode towards my bed. He looked into my eyes the whole time, our souls connecting. He tossed me onto the bed and placed himself in between my legs. “You are mine, doll. I want you and only you.” My whole body becomes heightened with arousal, I try to roll my hips into his but he stops me. “No, I’m going to take my time with you and show you how much you truly mean to me y/n.”

He starts by peeling off the black dress that I was wearing, leaving me in my matching blush pink underwear set. I assumed Seonghwa and I would end up sleeping together tonight so I wore it, and by the angered look on his face, it seems Yeosang figured the same. Frustration getting the better of him he rips my underwear off, like legits rips. The tear of fabric is all I hear before a rush of cool air hits my private area. He then does the same for the matching bralette. Anger now subsides to awe as he sees my naked form laid out in front of him. “So gorgeous.” He mumbles before leaning down and biting the sweet spot on my neck. As he bites he sucks to create a hickey. He repeats this action all down my neck, chest, breast, stomach and inner thigh. Leaning back on his knees once again he admires his work. He takes my new markings in as if he was staring at a piece of art, which in some ways I guess this could be his own art form.

Once he's decided that he has admired his artwork for long enough he slides off the bed to the ground,  pulling me by the hips towards his face and opening my legs , bearing  myself to him. He licks his lips and then he dives right into my soaking pussy. All kinds of sounds, moans, whimpers, pleas, etc come from my mouth as he eats me out. He doesn’t let up his assault as he makes me cum the first time, no he continues and adds two fingers. Soon enough I’m reaching my second climax. Still not letting up he adds a third finger and picks up his pace. Creating a pleasure I’ve never experienced before has me screaming out his name as I cum for a third time in a matter of minutes. Panting and truly struggling to breathe after that unworldly experience leaves me speechless. Yeosang stands from his current position, licking his fingers clean of my juices and licks his lips clean as well. The sight has my still pulsing walls clench again in excitement.

Pulling his form fitting, dark purple sweater over his head, exposing his lean torso and smooth abs to me. He reached for his pants and soon enough the sound of his dick was slapping against his skin. Mouth and pussy watering at the sight of this Greecian God standing before me. Kneeling back on the bed and then trapping myself under his form, he lines his tip at my dripping entrance. The thrill of having him inside me once again is almost enough to have me reaching my 4th climax tonight. He then slid himself fully inside, my walls burning with pleasure. “Fuck” the word comes out in a breathy moan directly into his ear. “Holy shit doll.” He flexed his hips and another wave of pleasure burned through me. “Taking me so well.” he drew his eyes away from mine and looked down to where we were connected. Slowing his pumps and filling me as much as he can, repeating the torturous motion over and over until I almost reach the edge, and then he stops. I dug my nails into his back, a plea for him to stop teasing me, and he quickened his pace. He flipped us over and pulled out the same move he did when we first had sex. Pulling me closer onto his sweat glistened chest, he wrapped his arms around me and began to flex his hips harder and faster inside me. He hit the spot deep inside that caused my vision to go blurry and my head short circuit. Hitting the spot over and over again he had me releasing in no time. He followed shortly after, once again filling my oversensitive pussy with his cum.

Unlike the first time we just stayed in this position for a while. We stayed connected like this for as long as we could. Neither one wanted to break this magically-seeming moment. We would have had we not started to get hard again, while still inside me. The sensation, while amazing, was too painful after 4 orgasms. He pulled himself out of me and grabbed my dress from the floor and began to clean me then himself off. When he was done he tossed the dress back on the ground and just stood there staring at me. Not sure what to say after suddenly feeling self conscious, “You can leave if you want now.” I say it almost as a test, but really it is just me outwardly thinking my biggest fear, that he lied and he was just playing me. He smiled and joined me in bed. “I wasn’t lying, y/n. I want you and only you.” He places a kiss on my forehead and he tucks us under the comforter. For the first time in months, I was finally able to sleep all through the night.

[alltheangstmygifttoyou]

Been messing around with this blogs format and organization a bit along with a side blog, sorry I haven't been active in looking at other people's work lately. My brains a bit all over the place and once again I'm losing time and having no clue where the days go or the hours. I've been working on getting on a bit of a routine and forcing myself to do things actively rather than just doing what I can to stay awake. Moving stuff has been put on a hold as my step mom has covid and my dad will likely catch it (I was told her symptoms were mild, I've got my fingers crossed that it won't get worse. They're both vaccinated, so they should be fine.) But organizing the first load and making room is a longer process than I was hoping for. Anyway thats a life update, I'm going to post some art and ramble about the possibilities they present below

Edit: its around a week later because I got too tired to finish writing the post rip

So I was organizing and I didn't see this page posted but that could be because I either didn't tag it properly or I didn't post it for a reason I don't remember anymore. I also didn't see Susan's charecter introduction post but I swore I posted that one so im going to dig a bit deeper. Anyway I'm going to go over each charecter a tiny bit. They all have their names by them but if you can't read them ill be going left to right starting from the top.

Sue: Susan is a scrubs oc that is doctor coxs daughter he doesn't know he has. They end up working together at sacrad heart and drama begins. Her story is a wip that can be read on my works on ao3 (linked on the stories page)

Ella: Ella Cox is another scrubs oc whose story hasn't been written down at all. She's doctor Cox's little sister. After *insert some kind of fresh trauma* she comes to live with perry, Jordan, and jack.

Rizza: Rizza is my first scrubs oc whose story was lost for years until I found it on my tablet some months ago. However her story is technically a wip, but its not posted publicly because its first chapter was never finished and the plot is lost in the recesses of my mind. Also the characterization was so bad it made me laugh multiple times. Very glad I found that draft x3

Lisa Moore: charecter design that i drew ages ago that doesn't have any developed story connections. She gives me massive fairy vibes so perhaps she could be a bitchy fairy in the mayvis universe? I'm also considering for the first time as I type that she could make a nice charecter design for a orginal wip that is in the very early stages of drafting.

Percilla Weasley: pretty sure I was wondering what Morgan and Hepatica kid could look like and came up with her, I think she's cute. I consider that she's part of the epilog to the happy ending of morgans canon story.

Zora: MCU oc that is Loki's twin and whose story is on ao3 and all I remember was its very....... part of me wants to say edgy or melodramatic, but I'm pretty sure at the time of writing the second chapter I was in a very dark depression and spiraling further down, so it feels dismissive to use those words that have a negative connotation. But it's very unrealistic and probably horribly OOC. As well as dark.

Jeremy: charecter design made because I missed 2p England's strawberry blonde hair but wanted my own charecter with it. He can honestly fit in any of my stories with how blank a slate he is. My brain gets anxious wealthy kid vibes.