#sorry for the vent gnna delete this later

[5eraphim]

im not entirely sure how i should take this.🧍‍♀️

i just never saw my writing as all that morbid or intense to be entirely honest? (but i grew up reading fanfiction on deviantart, which is like- too unexplainably horny and deranged to describe to those who werent there, so i think that might have given me brain damage or something)

but also, i really dont wanna sound mean, but sometimes i see these comments/anons calling me a freak and i'm like, "do you guys read any actually fucked up literature, or is it just fanfics. be honest now." nothing wrong with not wanting to engage with transgressive literature, we all have our limits, but cmon now, this is nothing!

if i were to list what i would call the most messed up books ive read (exclusively fictional) it off the top of my head it'd be- cows by matthew stokoe, 120 days of salo by marque de sade (didn't actually have the guts to finish this one, not just bc it was REVOLTING, but also it just wasn't a great book :/), haunting by chuck palahniuk, lets go play at the adams by mendal w johnson in the miso soup and coin locker babies by ryu murakami , the marbel swarm by ian banks, prodigal blues by gary a braunbeck, johnny got his gun by by dalton trumbo (i'm sure there's more, but you see what i mean?)

(for the record, i wouldn't really recommend these books as anything more than something to check out if you wanna read something fucked up. i think the only novels i would vouch for beyond their shock value would be the ones by murakami and marbel swarm tbh)

[gresiniracing]

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