#sorry for the shit quality of the screenshots the game is over 15 years now

[the-sentient-trashcan]

If we get a Spyro ending with Nuzi I'm going to cry

Just imagine if Uzi uses her solver to mend and keep Copper 9 from falling apart while N stays by her side

And then we get a fake out death but in the end we see them flying together

[silver-wield]

Hi! Sorry for bothering you. Don't know if you already did this one (so many analysis) but what did you thought about Sephiroth killing Barret scene? Everyone just go running to Barret and Cloud just froze.

No bother! Sorry for the wait, I had a few things on my plate to clear lol

Ok, spoiler warning for ppl who haven’t played – do I still need to do this? Eh ok, (I tag FF7R spoilers as final fantasy 7 remake spoilers) and it’s gonna be short-ish.

Also, this is one person’s interpretation of the scene, so if you disagree that’s cool and we’ll agree to disagree.

You’re also gonna have to excuse the janky quality on some of the screens, I’m grabbing them from Youtube and it’s frustrating af trying to get the exact moment I want.

Other analyses if anyone’s interested.

Shinra HQ vision scene (Cloti/plot analysis) 

Chapter 3 (Cloti reblog) 

Tifa character analysis 

Aerith Resolution (plot analysis/theory – I should probably update this since I’ve had other ideas since then) 

Train graveyard (not really an analysis, but I got some sweet screenshots of Cloti) 

Clotiscrew tunnel analysis 

Cloti reunion analysis 

The Promise Analysis 

Andrea’s approval (Cloti ask response) 

Leslie analysis (not mine, but a good read) 

Cloti action touching 

Aerti friendship analysis 

Cloti body language chapter 3 

Cloti healthy disagreement 

Cloti post heliboss battle (chapter 15) 

Clerith playground scene 

Cloti body language plate fall 

Cloud and Barret friendship 

Resolution scene analysis (A) 

Barret character analysis (chapter 13) 

Cloud character analysis (Honey Bee Inn) 

Now, strap in and enjoy the ride.

Recap time!

Okay, so our intrepid heroes have found Aerith, but then Cloud has a ptsd induced attack and passes out. After some exposition courtesy or Red and Aerith, we're back on mission to reach the roof and the Avalanche helicopter waiting for us – thanks to Wedge the cinnamon roll.

Once we reach the President's office we can hear shouting and make our way outside to find Shinra dangling from 70f up. Poor bby. Lemme help you up.

Anyway, Barret stops Tifa going to help (you’re too kind sometimes, T), grabs Shinra and after some massive restraint on his part, tosses him back onto solid ground. He pursues Shinra through the office and then in classic moron moment finds Shinra has a gun pointed at him. I'm not sure why the others didn't go too, but for whatever reason, they're in the doorway while Shinra is making his selfish bastard speech and Barret forgets he's got a literal machine gun for an arm.

Seconds before pulling the trigger, Sephiroth materialises out of thin air – and Cloud's Sephy sense didn't even go off this time – and he stabs Shinra, killing him in an echo of his OG death.

You get a shot of surprised Cloud and Tifa, then Barret lunges for Sephiroth while whispers appear through the doorway.

Ooh damn I'm good! 2nd go and I stop on this shot. First one was blurry.

Ok, this is obviously the moment where Sephiroth runs Barret all the way through. Remember, his sword is like 8ft long or some ridonculous shit like that. It's massive. He has zero need to get close to someone when he stabs them. He didn't do this with Shinra, he was like 3 feet away and still there was plenty of sword sticking out the guy's chest (anyone wonder if Seph is compensating for something? Lol).

Ok, so the point I'm getting at by showing Sephiroth this close to Barret is that this is a personal attack. This isn't something he's done just to kill someone. He's stuck that massive sword all the way through Barret's chest until he's within touching distance of him. This is an attack on Cloud. This is his way of showing Cloud that the vision from the VR scene could absolutely be true. He can make it true.

As for Barret, well he's just been stabbed, so he looks like he wants to go for pizza lol

Tifa automatically reacts and wants to run to Barret and save him. She's lost way too many people over the last day and can't lose anyone else. This is expected of her being the first one to react.

Interestingly, the next one to move is Red. The bromance is real. That's one fast friendship there and I love these two as friends. Barret and Red can snark at each other for a whole game and I'll be happy. 

This is a great moment though because it shows that Red's already formed strong bonds with everyone, enough that he'll go to their aid without stopping to think. For an animal character which is hard to read, you can see very easily the pain, fear and panic in his eye.

If you're a meta!Aerith theoriser like me then this is actually too much emotion on her face for someone who barely knows Barret. She looks like she just lost someone very important to her. They met like an hour ago. I love the amount of emotion on her face here, she clearly cares about Barret a lot. That's an “please God oh no” look if ever I saw one. Makes me wanna tear up and no lie.

And Cloud. Who doesn't move because he's literally frozen in place with a wide eyed look of horror on his face. He's seen Sephiroth stab people before. Back in Nebelheim reactor and then in the VR where he had to watch him stab Tifa (ok not really, but the mental trauma is still the same). He's shutting down. SOLDIER!Cloud.exe has stopped working. Have you tried turning him off and on again?

Cloud's terrified of Sephiroth anyway – he literally whimpers during one ptsd attack – so to see him stab Barret? His friend? And he didn’t even see it coming? It's probably sent his entire mind to a point where he can't function. This is the stuff that breaks him.

Aside: How did Sephiroth pull that whole long ass sword out of Barret without moving away? Does he have slenderman arms on the sly?

This is interesting. Sephiroth looks at Cloud, who's still shell-shocked, but then it's like you can see him rebooting. That absolute fury and hatred he has for Sephiroth overrides most of his shock – or tries. You can see the SOLDIER part of him trying to assert control over his fear, but then it wavers and the shock and fear – likely from real!Cloud – take hold again, making his eyes wide and him look as helpless as he feels.

Sephiroth's goal is to always make Cloud feel helpless, out of control, useless to everyone. That way he can control Cloud and make him do whatever he wants. He's a master manipulator and Cloud with all his issues struggles to fight against that mental barrage. It’s something that never goes away for him. This is his lifetime struggle and it’s a metaphor for those who live with mental health issues. There’s no one final battle and it’s all rosy. It’s never ending and some days you win, some days it’s Sephiroth. The point is to fight.

So, then the whisper leaps into Barret to save him and Sephiroth turns into a piece of Jenova. Now we've got some action happening, Cloud shakes off his weakness and goes back into SOLDIER mode.

Conclusion

Cloud can't deal with emotions. Of any kind. He's emotionally stunted, but that doesn't mean he doesn't have emotions. It's the opposite. He feels things far too deeply and intensely and hasn't learned how to process them effectively in a way that doesn't damage himself. This is stuff you learn as you mature from a teenager to an adult. This is stuff Cloud's been denied by being a lab rat for 4 years. His body may be an adult, but part of him is still 16. He needs to experience life to help him mature and catch that emotional development up to the rest of him. (which is my way of saying he won't be like a 16yr old forever).

Cloud's real and genuine affection for his friend over-rid any kind of control he had over himself and made it impossible for him to move when he saw Barret stabbed. He's also lost too many people, which is partly why he has that SOLDIER persona protecting him. Sephiroth's taunting look made it clear this was to get at Cloud. It had very little to do with Barret. Cloud's anger broke through his shock, but that weakness reasserted itself quickly afterwards, keeping him from acting until Jenova Dreamweaver appeared and he finally had something for SOLDIER!Cloud to take care of.

[aharris00britney]

ASKS 16

haha remember in July when I said I was gonna answer stuff every month... yeah me neither 🙈🙈 anyways lots of stuff under the cut

Anonymous said: You should get along with other Simblrs and start a new cc group now that PTS is disbanded, your hairs and clothes are always amazing! :D

Firstly thank you! Most of the clothing in AxA is 99% ayoshi with me going in after and cleaning/adding some stuff. So I give him props for the clothes :P As far as a ‘new PTS’ style group idk, there are a lot of amazing creators on simblr but I think the reason PTS was such a special thing is because the bond they all had. I feel that when working on collabs with some of my really close friends (such as the one coming out this month with @dogsill​ and @ayoshi​) because we have known each other for over 2 years now. A group of friends built only for collabing purposes would be more of a hassle than an enjoyment imo. <3

Anonymous said: HELLLOOOO! just curious bc why not but what is your favorite creation that you have made??

It varies every month to be honest lmao. If you asked me to pick a favorite hair from each month? Easy, always the last release of the month. But favorite hair ever? Awwww shucks 🤠 lmao I would say my Madison Hair is one of my favorite hair releases, I am planning to revamp it soon to work with my Mia ombre accessories and tidy the mesh up some. 

Anonymous said: hello, when will this collection be free for public download please? /post/186706149526/patreon-08-19

That came out in August luv, go to my downloads page and click AxA 2019

Anonymous said: Hi! Idk if you do wcif!!!! But if you do, wcif the freckles on the girl with the short hair on the BOP AHOOB collab?? If you know! Thank you much in advance!!!!!

Hey! You’ll need to send Bowl-Of-Plumbobs a message for that WCIF, that was his Sim otherwise I would link you. Sorry hun

@lumalinrose-sims​ said: Not a question, but you are like so cool I can't even--

thank you lmao I appreciate it, your profile pic it pretty cool :P

@ang3lba3 said: sarah is so pretty!!! is there a way to download how she looks in its entirety, or no? (sorry if this is a silly question im pretty new to the sims) 

not silly don’t worry :P the Sarah hair is for download on the post, the sim can be downloaded here but she is a bit outdated as I have changed her somewhat since then. 

Anonymous said: Hihi just stopping by to tell you how much I love your hairs!!

thank you so much! I appreciate the love<3

Anonymous said: hi! i just wanted to say that i love your cc so much i and always look forward to your posts! you make the cutest cc ever and honestly you're probably my favorite cc maker. you also seem like such a chill and genuine person we truly stan.

fgvhbjn thank you lmao I am literally TOO CHILL irl lmao I let people run over me so much but it’s whatever. Thank you again for the super sweet message. Have a great day if you’re reading this :)

Anonymous said: Heeeey we have the same name

Austin club :P great name til you’re trying to sign something and it looks awful (at least for me I can’t do my signature for shit)

Anonymous said: the collab with bop is so boring and dull it’s drier than a cracker it’s a no from me

well not everything is going to be someones cup of tea lmao I’m sure there is someone that enjoys it which counters you’re negative view <3

Anonymous said: Hi I love your cc! I have almost all of it in my game and I love your tropical punch palette so much I was wondering if you would ever consider releasing the palette.

If I ever make an ombre accessory tutorial video I will release a set of actions for the palette. If you wanna use the palette feel free to grab the hex codes from S4S.

Anonymous said: How did you become a ea game changer? Was it through Tumblr or youtube?

About a year ago SimGuruKate was the community manager and had applications for Tumblr Game Changers, I applied and got accepted. Follow SimGuruFrost on Twitter to stay up to date on when new applications are open.

Anonymous said: Are you going to upload the hair you made on your livestream? I literally love your work and am a Patreon subscriber!!!

Hey! The hair will be in my October voting (I think) and if it wins, release will be November. If it doesn’t win I will put it in November voting and so forth til it wins. Also thank you for watching the stream and supporting me on Patreon 

Anonymous said: hello!! i just wanted to see if knew is there’s anyway i can save my cc and save files somehow where i can download them again if my computer breaks so i don’t have to download it all again.?

zip your Sims 4 folder and upload it to Google Drive/SimsFileShare/OneDrive. Then when you install Sims 4 again you just replace the folder made in Electronic Arts in your Documents.

Anonymous said: what face do you make when your in love with a bee?

this is an old anon so I doubt they’re gonna check for this, and I can’t find the joke on Google so.... anybody know it?

Anonymous said: i love these collab sets they are honestly gifts from above

mhmm gifts from above for every collab except those in October... those are from below  👹 😳

Anonymous said: the pack is sooooo cute i love everything omg!!!! The male stuff is so adorable i can’t wait to download   

Anonymous said: you guys are the only ones i go to for packs i would love to see build buy items in the future we don’t get a lot mm stuff like that

Anonymous said:i just want to say thank you for putting in so much time and hard work and dedication to creating cc for us. i hope there's never a moment when you feel unappreciated, and i want you to know we all love you!

@primadonnaliferiseandfall​ said: all hail you and ayoshi for the cc pack its so pretty omg!!!!

Anonymous said: omg the kings have delivered!!

Anonymous said: since we got axa 2019 and 2018 will there be an axa 2020? 👀

Anonymous said: Great job on the pack! Everyone's items look gorgeous! Thank you for making this, you talented human being.

Anonymous said: ilysm! that’s all 💓💫

Anonymous said: just wanted to let you know that your content is absolutely amazing and i love it all :) sending love from the uk👍

Anonymous said: would you and ayoshi consider sharing the psds for some of the stuff in your collab? please?

thank you guys so much! Me and Ayoshi were super super happy with the AxA 2019 release and we are so happy with how many people have liked it. AxA 2020 will be a thing, yes. Also I have been working on PSDs that are super easy to navigate. I will get those up soon hopefully.

@graphicpickles​ said: Hey um, I dont know if you were aware of this but your discord link is broken ^^"

hey! this is super late sorry, discord link should be working now. If not: https://discord.gg/CtQR9tb

Anonymous said: Why would you include a cc hair in a preview for a cas review

because I liked the hair and wanted to use it 😗

@goddesssimmerina​ said: I just stopped by to tell you how much I LOVE your content. *_* I just went through and downloaded soooo much! xD I actually just switched to using MM hair and i'm so glad I did because I'm finding so many of you amazing creators and I thank you all sm! :*

awe thank you!! I appreciate it. Welcome to MM hair world :P

@moonbrightsims said: whats ur origin id?

AHarris00Britney

Anonymous said: how are your photos/screenshots so high quality? seriously, do you use a mod for it or idk editing? or maybe your settings?

Ultra Settings, and I use SRWE for HQ pics. 

Anonymous said: if you don’t answer this ask you’re straight

It has been answered. I am no longer straight. Was a hard two months not answering this 😔😔😔

Anonymous said: Hi, would you mind teaching us how you make the LoDs of your hairs? I opened one of them in S4S and found out your LoDs are great looking. I use decimate tool in blender and they look really bad.

I edge split everything before I decimate in Blender, I also delete the hairline and extrude the mesh inside the head before decimating as well. Really confusing to explain in words sorry. Might make a tutorial.

Anonymous said: omg ur cc finds blog has apink namjoo as icon and header. i'm.. sCREAMING. austin knows royalty

yes ma’am now where is the comeback

- it was at this point I realized I have caught up with my last asks post and have answered 4 things over again from Asks 15. Well... I guess that’s it folks

see yall in asks 17 in 2 months.... maybe the end of October idk

[ilovehatembj]

Man Up Part 2

@eriksbabymama @sweettea-and-honeybutter @Ljstraightnochaser @amethyst1993 @laketaj24 @daytimeheroicsonly @uhlxis @drsunshine97 @supernovaah @muse-of-mbaku @zuzuspanda @chefjessypooh @purple-apricots @hold-me-like-a-heart-beat @cockyboysandsugarism @destinio1 @siriuslycollins @dreadedphilosphy @texasbama @blackmisfitsunite @cool-pen-name @madamslayy @slimmiyagi @blackchickfics @omg-blackqueen @blue-ishx @maliadestiny @yourstrulyylauren

I didn’t think that many people would read my stuff let alone like it! Thanks for sharing and the positive comments, I hope you guys like this one and all the other parts that are gonna come!

Pairing: Reader x MBJ, Reader x OBJ

Warnings: Very light smut and cursing

“What the fuck did you just say to me Michael?!”

“I said was your business escorting that nigga. I was kindly asking if your business was prostitution if you didn’t catch my drift.” As soon as that nigga finished that sentence a headline popped into your head “Well Known Actor Michael B. Jordan Dead at Age 31”. But then you remembered that Odell still hadn’t been in your throat and that you prefer your wine from anywhere but a toilet, so you just pushed the thought to the back of your mind.

“Yeah I caught your drift alright. Who the fuck are you to ask me about my business any fucking way nigga?”

“Y/N, I am your man. That’s who I am to ask about your business.” he yelled with agitation in his voice, “You know what I’m not arguing with you over the phone. I’ll pick you up from the airport when you land, bye”. He hung up before you could even refuse. You decided not to even dwell on the conversation. Michael wasn’t on your mind and he didn’t deserve to be. Your mind was on someone much more deserving of all the dirty thoughts that lingered from moments prior. Or maybe it was months? It didn’t matter though cause after you got settled into bed for the night you were tired…..but your mind and body were still craving Odell’s touch, but you had to settle for your own.

As usual you were a sight to see and knowing that only turned you on more. Hair up in a bun and nude underneath of your white silky robe, you started at the valley of your breasts, then your hands moved to massage and play with both of your breasts. With closed eyes you envisioned it was Odell pinching and licking your nipples. Your hands started making their way down to your melted pussy. You slowly rubbed on your clit, then—your phone started going bezerk. You had gotten 15 messages in 1 minute and your phone was still going off because of an incoming Facetime call, all from the same person—it was Michael’s older sister Jamila a.k.a thorn in your fucking side for the past 3 years.

“Hi, Jamila”

“Bitch, don’t try to be cordial with me! You out here fucking around on my brother? With a injured ass sorry ass NFL player! I been told that boy you were nothing but an Instagram thot!”

“First of all you C-list Hollywood extra, I got your Instagram thot. You haven’t been relevant since you were an extra in I am Legend, leech ass hoe. Since you worried about things other than your sad ass marriage worry about your cheating ass brother and the actual Instagram thots he’s fucking, and the subpar ass strippers you and your husband been bringing into y’all bedroom. If you gon pay for pussy make sure the face that go to it pretty, bitch.” You hung up, you clearly had some shit to get off your chest after dealing with 3 years of her ass trying you and added the extra tea courtesy of Chyna.

You decided you were too exhausted to try to satisfy yourself tonight. The Jordans have officially pissed you off and a bitch had a flight to catch tomorrow.

You woke up late at 9 A.M. like you didn’t have a 12 P.M. flight to catch. You checked your phone and saw something unusual, a snapchat from that nigga. You opened it and your heart dropped to your stomach. You had every intention on ending everything with this nigga today, and you still were without a question, but you never thought he would take his disrespecting of you to this level. It was a video of him tongue deep with a very familiar Instagram hoe, Ashlyn. This bitch was always around everywhere. And the last time you had seen her in person it was NYE in LA and she was kissing that nigga when the clock struck midnight. When you confronted him about it then he said it was nothing, but your gut told you otherwise. You realized that you couldn’t handle this nigga how you your emotions were telling you to. You had to hit this nigga where he’d feel you most and it wasn’t gonna be through just destroying his cars.

You just wanted your time in NY to be over with so you just threw on some black leggings and a sweatshirt and headed down to your Uber and then to the airport. On the way there you got a call from Odell.

“Good morning lady”

“Good morning”

“You doing okay?” That was a weird question because last night for the most part went well, unless this nigga sent him the videos of him and that hoe as well.

“I’m fine. That’s an odd question for the morning after a date not gone bad.”

“I was just asking because I know he called you last night and cause of the comments under The Shade Room’s pictures of us—” you stopped him right there.

“What comments?”

“Damn. I figured you already seen them. I’m sorry. Just, just forget I said anything. You leave for the airport yet? If not I can take you, any reason to see your beautiful smile.”

“Okay, well I’m already in my Uber on the way to the airport now, but thank you anyway. Can I call you back when I land? We pulling up to the airport now.”

“Yeah, that’s fine but don’t forget.”

“I won’t!”

“Aight, have a good flight”

Ignoring Odell you decided to creep to see what on TSR’s ig sent that nigga into a life-threatening frenzy and check to see what comments Odell was talking about. After finally scrolling through their feed for a good while you see the three pictures that made that nigga see that he was the very definition of replaceable. The first one was simple, just a shot of the two looking at each other at your dinner table, the second one was just as simple. The third one though, THAT one is the one. The third picture could’ve been on the front y’all wedding invites (We speak positivity into existence over this way honey). Y’all were walking out of the restaurant and smiling looking into each other’s eyes, Odell’s hand was guiding you by your lower back out of Morimoto, and you looked at pure peace. The caption was generic as hell, “Y/N, what’s the tea sis?”, but a comment thread caught your attention. It was this bitch Saweetie. You read her comment that said, “Damn. Why ain’t Mike call me last night?”. You saw RED. You asked for your driver to pull over to the nearest FedEx Kinkos cause you wanted this nigga to see that it wasn’t just cheating, it was the balls these type of bitches grew. You  printed out the screenshots of her comment and asked the driver to speed so you could still catch your flight on time. You left him a fat ass tip for doing you those major favors.

You’re flight was smooth and you landed back in LA around noon your time. That nigga was waiting for you and he looked like his body was repaying his ass for that stunt and whatever other bullshit he did last night, he looked badly hungover. He didn’t speak to you, you didn’t speak to him, you just followed him to the car. Once y’all got in the car you snatched the aux away from that nigga so quickly and played your new favorite song. As soon as this nigga heard “Oochie wally bang bang” that nigga’s face dropped and he nervously started a conversation with you.

“So um, about last night, what were those um pictures?”

“Can this wait till we get to my house? I really like this song”

“Where’d you even hear this song”

“Can we discuss that later too? It’s getting to my favorite part”, he looked away and you sung along, “I’m in music, you in acting,so we keep that low profile, private and low key you know that is my type of style”. This nigga kept switching his focus between you and the road and just stared in pure confusion. When y’all finally pulled in the garage of your condo he beat you to the trunk of his car and grabbed all your luggage and  even held the door to your building for you. What had suddenly gotten into this nigga? Was the Michael Bakari Jordan fearful?

Once y’all walked through your door he walked to bedroom, dropped your bags, came back out and asked, “So, now can we talk about those pictures?”

“Yeah, but first we need to talk about a few other things. First let’s play a guessing game. Let’s guess who this hip-hop pass around was talking about in this song.” You played “23” again staring at him as he stared at the floor. The song finished.

“Easy, Drake.”

“Really? Drizzy?” you asked with a scrunched face holding your hands trying to not catch a DV charge.

“Yeah, matter of fact I saw her at one of his house parties in November.” Nigga really thought he was clever.

“Damn, well this bitch clearly didn’t know how to spell Drake under TSR’s comments today”. You pulled the screenshots of her comment out and put it in his face. “SHE WAS TALKING ABOUT YOU NIGGA!” You screamed. “I KNOW FOR DAMN SURE SHE WAS TALKING ABOUT YOU BECAUSE WHEN YOU HAD JUST GOTTEN YOUR i8 I HADN’T EVEN WORE MY BLONDE WIG IN IT AND I FOUND A MOTHERFUCKIN’ BLONDE HAIR! AND THE LINE ABOUT Y’ALL FUCKIN’ IN A CAR PROVED IT EVEN MORE CAUSE YOU BEEN SLANGIN’ YOUR MEDIOCRE ASS DICK AROUND HOLLYWOOD AND PHILLY. MEDIOCRE DICK THAT FURTHER DECLINED IN QUALITY WHEN YOU CAME HOME TO ME. YOU CAN KEEP YOUR LIMP NOT UP TO MUCH DICK AND THE BASIC BITCHES THAT COME WITH IT. DON’T SAY SHIT TO ME. DON’T ASK ME ABOUT NO FUCKIN’ PICTURES, DON’T ASKED IF I FUCKED HIM BECAUSE NO I DIDN’T BECAUSE YOU DECIDED TO RUIN MY FUCKIN’ NIGHT BY CALLING ME. YOU FUCKIN’ COCKBLOCK.”

“Y/N, you know-”

“NIGGA GET OUT AND TELL YOUR FUGLY ASS SISTER NOT TO CALL ME BACK ON BS UNLESS SHE REALLY WITH THE SHITS”

“Baby them bitches meant NOTHING! I promise!”

“Odell—” Ooop. Bitch its EVIDENT who you were thinking about. A part of you said Odell’s name on purpose because you wanted that nigga to know how done you were with him. Once you said that, that nigga was fuming.

“BITCH WHAT DID YOU JUST CALL ME?”

“BITCH I CALLED YOU THE NIGGAS NAME THAT I’M THINKING ABOUT. YOU HAVE NO RIGHT TO BE MAD ABOUT SHIT! ESPECIALLY AFTER THAT SNAPCHAT STUNT YOU PULLED WITH THAT HOE ASHLYN.”

“OKAY YEAH, Y/N I FUCKED HER LAST NIGHT BUT SHE SENT YOU THAT VIDEO WHEN SHE GOT AHOLD OF MY PHONE. BUT I’LL LEAVE! I DON’T CARE DAWG! YOU NEED ME! I DON’T NEED YO ASS! MAYBE IF YOU WASN’T SO BORING I WOULDN’T BE FUCKING THESE OTHER BITCHES” Did this nigga just magically forget all the connections that you’ve made FOR HIM?! Fuck the part about being “boring” you knew you were FAR from that. This nigga was set to be in a Ciroc commercial because you knew Diddy well because he went way back with your dad. This same nigga was able to be on Snoop Dogg’s VH1 show because Snoop considered you to be an actual niece. You were the only reason this nigga was able to say he knew so many Black celebrities. But all that was about to change as soon as that nigga left. You calmed down, walked him to the door and said, “If you say so”. “I’m done witcho ass. I paid for some pornstar titties and it’s time to go play with em.” You closed the door calmly. With everything that came out of that nigga’s mouth you finally realized what was wrong with him, he didn’t appreciate or value your presence, he was only still with you because he didn’t wanna know what your absence felt like.

You had calls to make. First it was Uncle Snoop and Diddy. All you had to say was he called you outta your name. He lost one endorsement. Then you called Dr. Dre, he still had some ownership of Beats, so he had a say in who was the face of it. That nigga lost an endorsement he was supposed to shoot for in a week. Then you called all of LA’s finest, from Nipsey Hussle to YG to the LAPD this nigga was a walking target. Your dad was well respected in LA so naturally the Bloods, Crips, and 5-0 would unite under your thumb. Then you called Pusha-T, this nigga could get all of hip-hop to hate one nigga at the drop of a dime. You have officially cost this nigga at least $15 million and potentially his life. You couldn’t careless, honestly.

You still had one more person to call and your night would exponentially better. Odell.

“Hello?”

“Hey, did your flight get delayed?

“No.”

“When you get home?”

“A few hours ago. I’m calling late be—”

“Its cool, I understand, you don’t have to let me down easy.”

“Odell, exactly what am I letting you down from?”

“Us, or a chance at us rather”

“See, you gotta let me finish my sentences. I was going to say I was late calling because I broke up with him.”

“Word?! Like forreal?”

“Forreal! Mister I think can read people’s brains”

“HAHA. You had me nervous girl. Damn. You gotta be quicker witcho points though. That whole miscommunication was on you.”

“You may have a point”

“Since I have a point how bout an invite to LA”

“Hmmmm. Consider this your invite.”

“I can be there Saturday”

“I’ll pick you up from the airport”

“Should I um, get a room at a hotel?”

“See I think there’s some sort of convention going on and I’m 1000% sure that every hotel in LA is booked. You don’t have to call and check either. Just take my word for it.”

“I think I know what convention you’re talking about.” The two of you laughed at your mutual understanding of what non-existent convention was going on. After you all sorted all the details he let you vent to him. You told him what you were feeling and why you were feeling it. You felt so at ease.

*Fast Forward to Friday Night*

You cleared out your schedule for the weekend and you were excited! You went to bed with butterflies in your stomach because you couldn’t wait until tomorrow morning!

[zzpopzz]

Really long rant about how I made Vanilla Twilight, I typed it at 2am so it’s kinda crappy and boring, just skip through this post.

So I'd been thinking about it for a long time now, even before finishing Vanilla Twilight that I'd talk about it if someone asked, well that never happened so I was just thinking that I'd let it go but that post is so important to me so well fuck it I'll just talk about it anyway. I did it completely on a wimp like how cool would it be if I make a lyricstuck for Toumaki like I'd be the first (if anyone did this before me im sorry). The first song I intended to do wasn't VT, it was a much shorter and easier song. I saw the music video first time after a while and the lyrics gave me some scenes to draw right away, like the tones, the atmosphere, the lyrics all fit them very well, made me wanted to draw something happy but sad. The ending for it was a happy one instead of a sad one like other songs I did (I didn't post the ending for any of them, just let the viewers decide what it's gonna be) I was very scared like what if it won't turn out ok and people gonna hate me for it or no one even gonna look at it. Also what I visualized are mostly illustrations with backgrounds, what I never done before so high chance it won't go anywhere. I thought well let's just see how far will I get and won't talk about it at all until I post it so at least I won't be all barks no bite. I was very traumatized that someone might know about what I did so I locked all the files when I shut down my PC in case someone hack into it lmao. I started with making a storyboard(kinda) for it, this is where I first got trouble because there was some part I didn't think of when I visualized what I'd draw at first ( 'I don't feel so alone' part mostly and some in between) and it's only at this point that I realized how many I'd have to draw (over 40 images total) and it's mind blowing for someone who rarely finish a painting like me at that time, that number is more than what I'd draw in a year. VT doesn't have choruses that meant I can't do tricks like repeat some panels (I don't like this anyway). I usually painted on small canvas before that but I wanna make sure I can fix things later and some idea I had was pretty big so I used 3000x5000px canvas then trimmed them down ( I didn't know how big it was and it's huge). The idea was to make a tumblr scroll-post like a lyricstuck (my favorites are by paperseverywhere and toastyhat/emptyfeet , they made really cool tutorials about these) so I tried to drew out compositions that would look good scrolling down panel by panel and have some connections between them (this didn't turn out so good in the end because I wasn't good lol) Since I was scared that people might point out that I draw something wrong, it took me almost a week or something searching for references (check my pinterest board) like the streets, sky, houses, roads, outfits, poses,... I was going to draw. I got some knowledge about bikes by this too, like I can tell the differences between road bike, mtb, touring bikes,... I also see and captured bunches of screenshots and reread ywpd trivia countless time to make sure I won't get anything wrong. If you take notice, every outfit Toumaki wear in there are all canon, from anime or promos. The first few panels was really exciting because I had never painted so many with backgrounds before, I was really happy when I almost finished the first verse even compared to the full 3:50 of the song it was only 20 seconds and I thought maybe I can pull this after all. The last panel was intended to be Makichan standing infront of his house looking at the sky but I wanted to show the sky at the end of the panel and that wouldn't work on scroll-down post so I had to leave it for later, I repainted this panel for about 3 times and finished it just 30' before posting. The first panel of the second verse wasn't turning out alright too because that was my first time doing a 3 points perspective drawing and the colors didn't turn out as I wanted either (my intention was a green/gold dawn scene). Things kinda worked well despite that until the scene when Toudou sits in his ink, gdi I didn't know why I was so caught up in that and painted every piece of that wooden floor, it took me almost a week but turned out better than I expected so I was ok with it. I was going to make sketchy paintings for all of the panel but I did too much details on that one so it gave me the impression that I'll have to do just as much for every others. Now I still had school to go and that semester my uni got me pretty crappy schedule that made me have to wait for classes at school frequently, I was frustrated because I didn't get to paint during that time and I might finish it too late (even though I didn't set a deadline) and when I got home I just spent so much time checking twitter and just can't pick myself up to draw and ended up feeling shitty about it. *Side story*  I was so mad because I didn't get anything done and there's still more than half of the whole thing to do and the worst part is that I had no one that I can talk to because I didn't have any friend who ship Toumaki and I also don't want to publicly talk about what I was doing, I wanted to surprise people when I'm done, I didn't wanna give people the expectation then screw it up (I literally thought I'd drop a bomb not a grenade lmao) I can't remember how long was that shitty phase but I felt like it was so long, I barely finished verse 2 at that point. I was so mad at myself and my progress so I spent a few days to look at time management threads and this helped a lot, I changed my habits completely  by this and I still apply those methods now, like I used to stay up til 3am to read fics (bless you writers you fueled me with your writings bless you all) then I switch to bed before 12 and get up early for a good start or reduce working time while increasing quality* After that I kinda got things together,I just went ahead with painting tho it's still kinda tiring, I had to work on 5 essays during this time too. At this point I was like screw all, I give no shit about what everyone thinks I'm just gonna finish this and get some good nap (I practiced power nap to get more focus time for painting but dude everyone wants a good long nap) 10 days before uploading I found out that there's a Toumaki day (I'm so sorry), I was going to posted on the first sunday of June (I did researched on which was the best time to post on social medias so I randomly picked a sunday) and Toumaki day is the last sunday of May, that meant I had 10 days left and 15 panels to paint! I was going to ignore that but I already made it big I should make it right too so I shit my pants going through those last panels. I purposely hiding Toudou's face till the last verse to emphasize the feelz and got so relieved that I finally got to paint him (I read some tags that some viewers got emotional at this part so I'm so glad it worked). The whole things was put under Makichan's perspective so I was so sick of painting him at that point, he showed up in every panel and I can't paint him ugly because he's beautiful (especially his hair, I spent shitload of time painting them). I can talk lots about why I picked to do so but that's headcanon shit and it's embarrassing so let's just skip that. The last day I had only 3 panels left and I was hell confident that I've got this and somehow spent the whole evening rewatch Toumaki pingpong ep (end me). Of course that didn't end well, I managed to finish those by midnight but I still had like 3 panels that needed  repaint completely and all 43 needed retouch and edits. My plan was to post at 9am sunday (thats 9pm saturday est) so I had to get up at 5am and finish all that, I ended up cutting down 2 panels and simplified the instrumental panel (some tags said that was nice so I was at least relieved). Unlike other songs I did, the length of every line's quite different and the original sizes I did would make viewers have to scroll slower or faster at different parts. I didn't plan this beforehand and had to trim down some panels even the parts that I really liked and spent lots of time on. I also found out that people outside the homestuck fandom might not familiar with this type of post so I made a video too (I’m sorry I have zero skill in editing). After posting I was terrified of people's reactions or worse, there won't be any reaction so I turned everything off and went to sleep and woke up with an unimaginable number of notes I'd got, I set the target of 500 notes and I really didn't think that I'd get past that number like maybe 2-300 (well my other songs didnt even get 200), at the end I got 5000. I spent the next week reading and screencap tags given in reblogs, I put them on desktop and they're still my motivation til now. Vanilla Twilight is the thing I'm proud of the most even until now, when I've done other songs and projects that look somewhat better. If I have to recommend one thing on my blog I'd recommend it despite its' unskilled paneling, poor composition and muddy colors. It was the first time in my life that I'd put so much effort into something and went through such emotional roller coaster, the feelings I put into it was raw and the idea was very original compared to other songs, I improved and changed a lot during the 2 months I spent on it and never once regret doing it. ***Anyway, you sure have much free time to read it this far, here's a little game for you: I put random things in VT and HF like some characters/stuff from other series, my ocs,... (there wasn't anything purposeless in there even the logo on their cups or the bags they wear) just send me anything you find and I'll draw you something in return**

[sportsanimebreakdown]

Breakdown: Ookiku Furikabutte (Big Windup or Oofuri)

SPOILER FREE

Big Windup: High school baseball anime (studio is A-1 Pictures) and manga (Asa Higuchi), ongoing.

Production: Solid. Production IG and Madhouse still dominate in terms of quality, but A-1 is sure as hell head and shoulders above the clusterfuck team that did Eyeshield (which was a combo of TV Tokyo, NAS, and Gallop).

Tropes: Low Self-Esteem Hero, Fudanshi Bait, “I Will Make You A Hero”, Slice Of Life

Not-Your-Wikipedia-Summary: Ren Mihashi is a total wuss because his middle school baseball team utterly destroyed his self confidence. They always lost because the catcher never knew how to use Mihashi’s insane ball control to their advantage. Now Mihashi is in high school and a nervous wreck and joins the baseball team. The catcher, Takaya Abe, (voiced by the extremely talented and easy-to-pick-out Yuichi Nakamura), sees Mihashi’s potential and decides he’s going to make Mihashi into the best damn ace that’ll take them all to Koushien. Cue slow-paced, feel-good, team-coming-together-against-the-odds 

TL;DR Review: It’s cute. It’s low stress. If you want to watch the friendship between boys be pushed and pulled and strained and celebrated all in the frame of high school baseball, and if you want that satisfaction that comes from a low-self-esteem hero showing everyone up, it’s a fun trip. Yes, all the character blush too much and the queer baiting between several characters is so obvious it borders on fetishization. But it’s not a bad thing to have different kinds of boys represented: scared boys, crying boys, boys who aren’t sure of themselves but are teaming up to try their best. We need to show that no matter what kind of person you are, you’re still a valuable part of the team. 

"Objective” Score: 6/10 (for those who like/need a slow pace and can overlook the problematic coach [more below])

Personal Score: 4/10 (too queer baity [make it gay or don’t, just stop with the fucking baiting], too slow, too problematic with the coach character)

Full Thoughts: So it’s been awhile since I watched this series. After watching One Outs I thought I’d go watch its exact opposite while still in the baseball genre. I have to say, it didn’t really age on me well. I think it’s a good series for 13-15 year-olds. It has all that blushing queer baiting that, if you’re in the closet or still figuring yourself out, might be tantalizingly close to validation. Also, like I said above, it’s great to see boys who aren’t chock full of toxic masculinity. You can be a scaredy cat and still be a good athlete. It has enough humor and embarrassed-youth moments to make it relatable/more dramatic for younger viewers or those who are still capable of being embarrassed. For those of us who are older/cynical/naturally-prone-to-being-an-asshole, watching it is more irritating than anything else. 

But let’s talk about something else...

Author Insertion Characters: Now, let me make it clear at the outset that this is NOT limited to female authors/creators. Pretty much every series has The Inserted Author, and more often than not it’s the protagonist. This is especially apparent where there are multiple female characters all in love with one boring ass dude. But what about when the Inserted Author isn’t the protagonist? What about when they’re a side character who is vicariously enjoying some exploitative scene? Usually, with male authors, we get side male characters who “happen to” see panty shots, etc. They’re so common to any series that they hardly need mentioning. I admit, I don’t even mention it, I’m so used to it; I just roll my eyes and watch on. But in the case of Oofuri, we get the team’s coach, Momoe. As soon as I saw her, I knew the series had been written/drawn by a woman, in good ways and bad. She’s got big boobs, has a strong personality, and the team is intimidated by her insane baseball skills and general strength. If she’d been written by a man, the team would’ve been drooling over her big breasts and there would have been a nonstop “comedic” tension over how sexy she was. But she’s not sexualized in any way. For that, I'm super grateful. (The bar is low for my gratitude, I admit.)

But there’s a couple of things about her that threw major red flags for me: one, that it’s made clear that she pours all of her money into this boy’s baseball team. Now, she’s a woman with insane baseball skills and a clear passion for the game. So why the fuck didn’t she start a GIRL’S softball team? They don’t even cover it, as if it’s not even a real question. And why is she pouring all of her everything into serving these young boy’s needs? Talk about gender role stereotypes. Why isn’t the school providing funds for all this equipment? Or if not, why aren’t they finding a way, as a TEAM, to raise funds for it? Why is she, the only woman on it, pouring all of her money into it? That’s one red flag. The other red flag basically answers all of those questions and can be seen below:

I’m sorry, is that woman orgasming over team bonding between adolescent boys?  If you don’t have a problem with the above screenshot, if your brain is saying some shit like “but no, it’s pure! Because she’s a woman! And they’re boys!” then I want you to do a mental experiment: imagine that screenshot above with the genders switched. So an older man is clutching himself, blushing and sweating like that, saying “this is so good” behind the backs of a bunch of oblivious 14/15-yo girls. Is your mental reaction a little different? Good. Now readjust your previous opinion. This answers the question of why she’s coaching a boy’s team. Because the author wanted to vicariously jill off on the emotional bonding between young boys, all under the excuse of the Female Purity Myth. What am I talking about? It’s the pervasive idea that women can’t be sexual/perverted. That womanhood somehow makes women “naturally” pure. This is damaging to men and women: To women because we’re shamed when we ARE sexual beings (which is a one sentence understatement of a very complicated issue), and to men/boys who are sexually abused by women but feel that they can’t come forward about it.

So. I’m conflicted. I like her character because SHE isn’t sexualized... but I’m angered by how the series validates the fetishization of queer relationships between boys by older women. I’d rather watch a series that has no female characters than a series that has one who is this problematic. I’ll be passing on re-watching any more of this.