#sorry for the long post but its mostly for my own organizational purposes

[alexturne]

My Milex fanfic masterpost

LONG CHAPTERED STORIES

under these lights you look beautiful

Rated E - 103k - 14 chapters

Miles got completely lost in his voice. There was a faraway quality to it, like he belonged somewhere else entirely, but somehow had decided to grace them with his presence and Miles felt blessed to be near him if even for a short while. The subtle elegance hidden in his slender figure, the mannerisms of his fingers wrapped around the corners of his notebook. His words were spoken softly, quietly, but without any hesitation or faltering.

Alex is an elusive poet, who has a way with words and Miles is a bartender, who is completely mesmerized.

the element of surprise

Rated E - 45k - 8 chapters

"Yeah! I'm not one to judge, just want ya to be prepared, you know, just in case.." "In case what?" Jamie rolled his eyes at him. "In case nothing. Nevermind. Forget it. Just help me find your skiing gear and we'll be off." "Skiing?" "Yeah, didn't you hear the lady? We're taking you on a surprise skiing trip to celebrate your birthday, mate!"

The Monkeys invite Alex skiing for his birthday and little does he know that there's a very special surprise waiting for him.

sit next to me before i go

Rated E - 28k - 7 chapters

He'd get up in just a second. He'd go downstairs and make Alex sit down on the tall stool by the counter, and have him tell Miles everything about his amazing tour as Miles puttered around the kitchen fixing them both tea and biscuits. It'd be perfect.

If only he could get up.

Or: Miles is sick and is being very stubborn about it, and Alex flies back to take care of him.

my heart melted in the heat

Rated E - 36k - 9 chapters

The cold winds of winter rush through the old college town. Miles drags himself through another shift at the dingy coffee shop, Rich's Beans, and he wishes for summer, for the day he is out of here. But when he gets a new coworker, a young guy named Alex, with pretty dark hair and even prettier dark eyes, life suddenly seems a little brighter.

Will Miles be able to keep his bubbling feelings under control or will his silly crush keep him warm during this season's freak thunderstorms?

Written for the Shadow Monkeys Big Bang 2022

you've got control of everyone's eyes (including mine)

Rated E - 106k - 19 chapters

The tour was coming up soon, everything set in place, and tonight they'd celebrate and let off some steam before it all began. And now he had to deal with this guy? Miles fucking Kane? Of all the nights? Couldn't a guy be allowed to celebrate in peace?

It's 2005 and the Arctic Monkeys are about to set out on their first proper tour. Alex is quite happy with that, until a certain someone gets in the way and spoils it all.

A story about facing hardships, insecurities and stage fright, about friendships, dreams, music and smoking too many fucking cigarettes in dark back alleys. About keeping your friends close, and perhaps your enemies even closer.

SHORT CHAPTERED STORIES

pinned down by the dark

Rated E - 10k - 4 chapters

He knows exactly what’s going on on the other side of that door. The thought sends a shiver up his spine. And he knows who it is as well. He'd recognise that voice anywhere. Someone's in there alright! It's Al, for fucks sake.

Miles hears a soft moan through the door. And he takes a step back from the door, wondering if perhaps he shouldn’t be listening in on his best mate pleasuring himself in the middle of the night.

3 times Miles hears Alex in the middle of the night and 1 time he does something about it.

you're so pretty and i'm so shy

Rated E - 14k - 2 chapters

“Fine, if you’re so shy then why don’t you write him a note? Like in the films, write your number on a slip of paper, give it to him or slip it into his pocket or summat.”

“That might work!”

“I was kidding Alex!”

pretending you were just some lover

Rated E - 13k - 2 chapters

That damned piece of paper marked a death sentence he'd requested himself on that fateful day three months ago.

Today would mark the end of the charade.

When he'd sign his name on that dotted line.

When his marriage to the single greatest, most gorgeous, most wonderful person alive would end.

Or: Alex is a dumbass who tries to get divorced from the love of his life.

ONESHOTS

i've been saving all my summers for you

Rated E - 22k

They were 11 when they first met at the beach, now at 21 they’re back. Back at this place that became theirs. The place they became best friends.

The place where Alex fell in love for the very first time.

nobody ought to be alone on christmas

Rated M - 12k

"And it's not my fault he's all the way away in LA! Stupid, far away LA. London's a nice place too, you know! It's worth sticking around for, especially at Christmas!"

"What's stopping you from seeing him? You're obviously miserable without him, with nowhere to go for Christmas. Get out of your joggers. Go to LA. Go see him. Tell him you love him."

stop making the eyes at me

Rated E - 25k

He turned to look at Alex, took off his sunglasses and tucked them into the quite unbuttoned neck of his shirt. His eyes roamed over Alex rather shamelessly, slowly looking him up and down as an appreciative smirk formed on his lips, and Alex suddenly felt hot all over.

Or: Alex gets stuck inside an elevator with a hot stranger and a bottle of whiskey and they need to find a way to pass the time.

you just ain't the one for me

Rated E - 7k

Suddenly she had an idea. "I wanna fuck him. Miles. I wanna fuck him." Alex made a weird choking sound. "Pardon?" "I wanna fuck Miles. And then I wanna watch him fuck you."

Taylor has an idea of how to spend their sunny afternoon and she's not about to take no for an answer. Sexiness ensues and she makes a few decisions about their relationship.

magic from your fingers tingles down my spine

Rated E - 8k

"Wanna make out?" Alex coughed out a cloud of thick smoke. He blinked and looked at Miles next to him. Miles was making quite the sight, sprawled out across Alex's sheets with a dirty smirk plastered on his face. He looked nice, spread out like that. All relaxed and comfortable, as if he'd always been destined to end up right there in Alex's bed.

Or: Whilst writing their first album together, Alex and Miles get high, and Miles has a great idea about how they could be spending their time.

you're a matter of urgency

Rated G - 8k

The cab ride had been the most anxious 36 minutes of his life. Jiggling a nervous leg and staring out the window, he'd clutched the phone hard in hand, devil device that it was, as it'd brought him the single worst message he’d received in his entire life;

"Miles was in an accident. Come quickly."

i'll be home for christmas

Rated E - 13k

Alex Turner had it all.

A massively successful global tour, adoring fans everywhere he went, amazing sales figures, another number one album, a gorgeous house, a jealousy-inducing collection of vintage cars and motorbikes and the best bandmates you could ask for.

But one fateful Christmas eve has Alex realizing that none of that truly matters. And that the one thing he could truly never live without is the one he let get away.

going back to 505

Rated T - 2k

"Wanna bring out a very good friend of ours. Put your hands together please, for Miles Kane!"

Miles joins them for 505 for the first time in 5 years.

[technicolorfamiliar]

The Artist vs Social Media

I have been sharing my feelings about art and its ever-growing relationship to social media with a number of people recently. I wrote a bit about it here some months ago, but that was primarily focused on reactions to different types of art I was posting on different platforms. Without a doubt, it’s been something that’s given me pause for a while, and I have a suspicion I can’t be the only person that feels this way.

To be clear: this is not meant to be an attack on the people who enjoy and excel at being a creative on social media. It is purely an expression of my own frustration, a cry out to others who have struggled with the same issues, because I know I’m not alone.

First of all, my personal style just doesn’t compliment a successful social media presence, I’m such a fan of the long-format, in general. I don’t want anything in my life to be bite-sized, cropped, or condensed. I struggle to convey the concepts teeming in my heart in a limited number of characters and pixels. As I am evolving as an artist, I enjoy incorporating many layers of meaning, drawing on a multitude of sources for inspiration. Social media, for the most part, wants to condense, compartmentalize, limit. It’s short-format, lacks fluidity, and promotes shorter attention spans. It feels counterintuitive to the kind of art I love and the art I want to be making.

For as streamlined and easy as social media has made sharing artwork with the great big world out there, it’s also birthed a lot of additional anxiety and despair. At least that’s been my experience. Some people have taken to social media like ducks to water, they are thriving in an endless stream of posts and pictures and stories. But this particular artmaker finds the rise of social media more like an impossible mountain, and climbing it is a requirement.

I envy the artists and makers who have figured out how to hack social media in order to promote their work and their brand. These people make it look easy, like social media integration with one’s art practice is as simple as breathing. I understand how it is crucial now as any kind of artist to have a big social media presence. But despite that understanding, I still have a lot of issues with it.

I was in art school in the still relatively early days of Instagram. Facebook and Twitter were big, but I didn’t really ever get too deeply involved in either platform. For me, Facebook was mostly for staying in touch with friends and family back home. I didn’t even have a smart phone until some time after I graduated. The school I attended encouraged us to build a website, get a business card, but there was no way to prepare us for the expansion of these apps among others that would emerge later on. This is not a sorry attempt at an excuse for my complicated relationship with social media, because there are a lot of artists in their early 30s right now who are very clearly doing well in that arena.

Circa 2009 – 2011, using social media for networking was beginning to be a real thing to consider. Having a Facebook page and separate Instagram and Twitter accounts devoted to your craft in addition to your website and blog in order to reach all possible professional connections was increasingly important. And now, they are all absolutely essential. People think you must be kidding yourself if you’re making art and don’t have a social media presence. I’ve caught myself being judgmental of young artists who aren’t on social media. But then I’m reminded of my own issues with Facebook and Instagram and all the others and I think maybe I should shut my mouth.

—

That’s the background. The real thing I’m trying to say is this:

Social media is exhausting.

I hate it.

For all the good content being generated and shared on FB, IG, etc there are a thousand mentally and emotionally draining posts being shared by people who, by and large, aren’t on social media to promote their craft. And that’s fine, people should have a place to vent their frustrations, laugh at funny or un-funny memes, share recipes and cute animal videos, get 100+ validating reactions to their photos, post thoughts/criticisms/ideas too long for Twitter but too short for a blog…

But to expect an artist generating original content to compete with everything else being blasted on every social media platform is complete and utter unrealistic nonsense.

—

My big, huge, major beef with social media is the totally insane decision to stop having posts featured in chronological order on pretty much every major platform. This really hurts creative people who are trying to get exposure, share their work to the world (or at least their friends and followers), and requires them to generate even more content, or share the same post over and over again in the hopes that their painting or photo or video somehow makes it over all the other posts from everybody else that are only just so much noise. Trying to get noticed or share your work with likeminded creatives you don’t already know is like shouting in a canyon full of other people shouting, drowned out by all the other voices and the echoes of the voices.

But that’s not the only thing about social media that keeps me up at night.

There are people on social media who have become experts in making their lives look like perfect, magical journeys of self discovery and growth and good fortune. Seeing their perfectly composed, perfectly lit photos of what is supposedly their daily lives, their brunches, their cocktails, their pets, their clothes, their travels, their significant others, and whatever else makes me want to not even try. Why should I even bother to try to compete with that? Looking at those kinds of posts immediately makes me feel inferior because 1) I’m not living that theoretically beautiful, charmed life, and 2) I’m not generating masses of content like that of my own experience. I look at my weird little life and there’s hardly anything photo- or post-worthy, at least not on a daily basis, not enough to get above everyone else’s noise. When did having a social media presence become an art form in and of itself? One of my very close friends described social media as performance art, which is probably the best description of this phenomenon I’ve ever heard. I’m not saying it’s not hard work — in order to project this perfect life, you have to be a photographer, or at least know and/or have the money to pay for one, be a master of self-marketing, and you have to set aside the time in your day to make the posts (more on that in a bit). But as someone with at least half a brain, I know that the content being gobbled up by glowing, supportive friends and followers is only a version of reality.

I know I’m not the only one who feels utterly alienated by the “perfect lives” being presented on social media, and I know that it’s not most people’s intention to alienate their friends by posting gorgeous photographs and positive affirmations of their own journeys.

And yet, even just thinking about it is exhausting. It’s a destructive and deadly combination of self-loathing and self-doubt inspired by the vast majority of what I see on Facebook and Instagram with knowing full well that those feelings are totally unfounded since the posts are not a true reflection of reality. It doesn’t motivate me, it doesn’t inspire me to follow their lead, it doesn’t get my blood pumping. It just makes me tired.

—

By my nature, I am a relatively private person. I have no real desire to share my private life with strangers, and it’s a struggle for me to open up to acquaintances. I have a hard time talking about myself, my dreams and aspirations, my needs and wants with other people. I keep to myself, I have a small circle of close friends and family with whom I share things openly.

There’s nothing like the gut-wrenching feeling you get when you’re talking passionately about your art or your interests or your hopes for the future with someone and seeing the very moment their eyes glaze over with disinterest. It’s a special kind of soul-crushing dismissal that has lead me to live an introvert’s life. Because why, after all, would I share anything with people when that’s the reaction I often got in my youth when sharing with my peers?

The whole grand purpose of social media is to share. Share everything and share often. Artists who hold regular jobs and don’t have an abundance of free time or energy to devote to generating social media content on top of the art they’re already making need to find that magical balance. The Buzzfeed article about burnout that was circulating a few months ago touches on this a bit. Work + Art + Self Promotion. That’s always been the case for artists looking to make a profit off their work, but now it’s on a whole other level and puts creatives in direct competition with social media influencers and everyone else on FB, IG, Twitter, Tumblr, Snapchat, etc. When I say time and energy, I mean the lack of energy I personally have after a working a job that already requires me to use my creativity, strategy, and organizational skills. When I get home or when I finish a job, I want to recharge so I can have the energy and motivation to actually sit in my studio and make new art. I struggle with budgeting out my time and energy for taking photos, writing cute little descriptions, thinking up clever hashtags, and setting timers to remind me when to post in order to get the most views.

I’m over-focused right now on making the art, in finding my voice as an illustrator, in re-vamping my portfolio and considering the future of my practice. I would need a personal assistant to run my social media accounts in an effective and professional way, and I don’t understand how other artists don’t have assistants. Or maybe they do. At the very least it would require me to have my phone in my hand far more than I already do, so another reason to keep it on me, especially in my studio while I’m in the zone, working, makes me feel gross.

I know what you’re thinking. You’re thinking, “But Emma… you took all this time to write and edit this long blog post. Surely you could have used that time to work on content for your IG or FB accounts.” And you would be right. However, I’m in a place mentally and emotionally where I see the social media game, I understand it, but I just don’t want to play it. Not the way we’re all expected to if we want to get noticed. I’m not a performance artist, I’m not extroverted enough, my process doesn’t lend itself to this new gold standard of being an artist in the 21st century. Am I making big strides to change my process? Not really, because the very nature of social media feels inauthentic to me and the work I want to be making.

—

In the end… I don’t really know how to make social media work for me and my own journey as an artist. It would be great if there was some compromise, some middle path for people like me who are rubbed the wrong way by hashtags and stories and filters. Is there even a possibility for existing any other way as an artist today? Because everyone I know who creates any kind of art seems to have accepted and figured out the key to doing well on social media. It’s almost not even worth airing my grievances since I’m not willing to completely change and conform to something that does not feel right to me.

I’ll just keep plugging along as I have been until I figure it out. Or some kind souls who have been through a similar conundrum swoop in and offer their wisdom and insight.