#sorry avatar beat is in my head rn

[skeletonsonparade]

final boss themes that aren’t victorious or epic or heroic sounding at all >>>>>>>>>>

[strongheartneteyam]

A New Beginning.

Pairing: Neteyam Sully x female!human!reader/female!avatar!reader

cw: lots of fluff, angst, hurt/comfort, slightly sexual language, kissing, hugging, tsaheylu is mentioned, TRIGGER WARNING for brief talk of death (of Reader's human body), Jake and Neytiri being the best in-laws ever

@anika-rose-walker Here's your request after ages lol I'm so sorry, boo 😅

I changed the plot from what you asked a little bit (Neteyam and Reader are already together, instead of confessing to each other throughout the story) bc I had already written the beginning of it when I went back and read the rest of your request lol I hope you don't mind. I love you sm and I hope you like it, my lovely Kayla 💕

PS: in this story, going through a transference of consciousness from a human body to an Avatar is not as dangerous as it used to be because it has been done many times before. I have no idea if it makes sense but pls just go with it for the sake of it being easier to write 🥲 my wrist hurts so bad 

na'vi words: tsaheylu (neural bond that the na'vi make with their mate), yawne (beloved), yawntu (loved one), paskalin (sweet berry), muntxate (female mate), muntxatan (male mate), oeyä (my, mine), sevin (pretty), tawtute (human)

Not proofread. Sorry if some parts are a bit off but I can't fix it rn lol

༉‧₊.

The suns of Pandora were shining bright in the sky that day but nothing was brighter than your smile. You were overcome with happiness as what you had been anticipating for so long was finally gonna happen: you were getting your own Avatar, a body that would let you experience Pandora without that damn oxygen mask that held you back, not letting you breathe the fresh air and worse, not letting you kiss your na'vi boyfriend Neteyam unless you two were inside the lab. You were the daughter of one of the best scientists of the laboratory so you always spent a lot of your time there, but Neteyam was a busy young man and he couldn't visit you at the lab everyday which sucked. You were so addicted to him that spending even a single day without feeling his plump blue lips on yours, his soft and wet tongue lapping and sucking on your tongue felt like a kick in the stomach. You truly felt lovesick whenever it happened. Talk about a strong love and being needy for someone.

You were walking through the Omatikaya mainland, where all the people's huts were, and looking for your boyfriend. You hadn't told him you were gonna get an Avatar. You wanted it to be a surprise. Your brain could not comprehend that you would finally be able to make tsaheylu with Neteyam. Tsaheylu, man! Imagining being able to feel his affection for you through the bond, his need and desire, feel the pleasure he was feeling as the two of you mate… that felt otherworldly and so incredibly exciting. It's a connection beyond what your human brain could comprehend, honestly. Only your na'vi brain would be able to fully understand it.

Neteyam ended up finding you before you could find him. There was a sea of tall blue aliens around.

“Sevin tawtute!” He called out to you loudly, his voice excited 

When your ears heard that beautiful voice and your eyes saw his large figure, you ran to his arms and held him tight, your head only reaching his waist, so much taller he was than your human frame. You wondered the height difference you two would have once you were Dreamwalking.

“Oooh! I'm glad you're this happy to see me, muntxate!” Neteyam put his big hands on your head and pet your hair softly.

“Teyam, I got something wonderful to tell you!” You looked at him, as happy as a kid who just got a gift they'd been waiting for ages to get

Neteyam got down on his knees to cut your height difference almost in half.

“What is it?” He smiled, his fangs charmingly touching his lower lip

“My father just told me earlier today that my Avatar is ready.” Your eyes shone like stars in a dark night sky 

“Your what?!” His striped blue face betrayed his surprise

Neteyam's heart started beating fast. Was his yawne truly telling you what he thought she was?

“Are you serious, princess? Why didn't you tell me about it? My Eywa…” he chuckled, still incredulous 

“I wanted it to be a surprise! I wanted to see this beautiful surprised look on your face, muntxatan.” You look so cute. I love you so much.” Your eyes started to water

Neteyam smiled even wider. He took your oxygen mask off and quickly used both his large hands to grab your face and crushed his lips against yours, before putting it back on again.

❦︎

You opened your eyes and your vision seemed to be better as you tried to get used to the bright white artificial lights of the Avatar first testing room in the lab.

“How are you feeling, (y/n)?” Your hearing was surely much sharper as you heard those words coming from a nurse's lips in a much louder volume than you would in your human body. 

You moved your fingers and raised your hands up next to your face so you could look at them. Your fingers were blue and your wrist had some bioluminescent freckles on it. God, your skin looked much more beautiful now than it did in your human body. You were afraid you were already liking this body much more than your original one.

Your focus was so much on your new experience in your Avatar that you forgot to answer Julia's - the nurse - question.

“Can you hear me, (y/n)?” You got out of your trance and finally looked at her 

“Yes. Yes, I can! Really well, by the way.” You smiled at her. Your fangs touching your lip was a new sensation, a really cool one.

After the scientists and nurses ran some tests with you on your new Avatar, you finally were able to change from your hospital like clothes and went out of that cold room wearing some dark jeans shorts and a simple white sleeveless shirt made of a cotton like material.

You saw Neteyam sitting in one of the brown sofas in the next room. His beautiful face looked tense.

All his tension faded away as soon as he saw you. His pretty yellow eyes shone as he took your appearance in. Neteyam didn't think he could ever fall even deeper in love with you but that had just happened.

“Oeyä muntxate… you look breathtaking. Oeyä sevin yawne…” he walked slowly towards you, still enchanted by the sight of your Avatar body

Neteyam held you by your waist, bring you close to him and gave you the most tender of kisses. You kissed him back, your lips almost trembling with happiness and affection. Neteyam tasted your mouth, his tongue licking not only your tongue but your fangs too, exploring your new na'vi body. He loved how similar you were to him now just as much as he loved the differences between the both of you when you were in your human form.

❦︎

Some weeks passed and you had never been more happy. A short period of time lived being able to Dreamwalk and kiss Neteyam in the woods, on the Sully's hut and in any other place you wished to brought you much more joy than all the years you lived before.

You and Neteyam were standing in front of the lab. You two were about to say goodbye and you would wake up in your human body. But there was a feeling inside of you that you had been haunted by for some time now and it was getting harder and harder to fight it. You finally spilled it out.

“I think I wanna leave my human life behind and become one of the people. If they will have me. If you will have me…” somehow you felt insecure, as if you forgot how happy Neteyam got whenever you were by his side

Surprise was all over his face.

“Are you sure of what you're saying?”

“Yes, I am. I've never been more sure of anything in my life. I know it seems sudden… I'm tired of being human… I'd much rather be your mate and learn archery, learn to cook na'vi recipes, worship Eywa, participate in the sacred rituals, run free in the woods instead of worrying about human social rules, live among artificial lights, eat junk food - don't get me wrong, you know I love some good hamburgers” Neteyam laughed at your remark “but fresh hunted meat, seasoned with herbs and wild spices tastes much better. Also…” You looked into his large feline eyes “I wanna spend more time with you, I wanna live in our own hut… I wanna be always by your side, my Teyam. I hope you don't find me too needy.”

“Of course not, yawntu. The more you need me, the better ‘cause I need you too. So much.”

He stole a happy smile from you with those words.

“And, yawne… How could you ever doubt if I will have you be na'vi and always be with me, live in our own hut? Darling, that's all I've ever wanted. Only Eywa knows how many nights I've talked to her, wishing that it could happen one day.” His voice was full of heartfelt truth

You breathed out, relieved.

“We can talk to my dad about it. He's been through it himself before, I'm sure he can be of great help.”

You nodded and smiled “Okay.”

❦︎

After Neteyam took you to talk to the Olo'eyktan of the Omatikaya tribe, his dad Jake, his tired face lit up and he smiled, showing no teeth or fangs at first.

“You sure of it, kid? It's a big deal. Your human body is gonna die and that can be really traumatizing to your head."

“I know, Mr Sully. I've thought about that. I can deal with it if it means getting to live as one of the people forever.” You said sternly 

“You're also gonna make a big commitment by becoming na'vi. You're gonna have to learn to use weapons, to hunt, to be fearless. You're gonna have to prove yourself worthy and go through your Ikinimaya before being truly considered one of the people. Are you up for it?” He looked like a mix of a father giving some life lessons to his kids, like a military chief of some kind and like a fierce leader. All three were indeed a part of him.

“Yes. I will do my best to prove myself worthy of becoming na'vi.”

Neteyam watched the two of you, some tension inside of him, as he felt like maybe his father was being too harsh on you, but he also knew he was doing what he had to as the Olo'eyktan and as someone who had once made the same decision you were making now and knew very well what he was talking about.

“Then you have all my support!” Jake finally smiled wide and opened his arms towards you “give me a hug, kid.”

You gladly walked until you got to where he was squatting - not that far from where you were sitting cross legged before - and hugged your father-in-law.

Neteyam smiled too.

“Thank you, Dad.”

When it came the time to talk to Neytiri, things went smoother than you had imagined. It seemed like a dream, in all honesty.

“You do whatever your heart tells you to do, paskalin.” Neytiri smiled at you “I believe Eywa herself chooses every human who decides to become one of the people. How could you say “no” to a request coming from the Great Mother?”

Your brain could not come up with words to describe how happy and relieved those words coming from your mother-in-law made you.

❦︎

Talking to your dad broke your heart a little. Your mother had died and you were his only family now.

“I just don't wanna lose my little girl.” Your dad was now sniffing. You felt bad as you never saw him cry.

“I'm not leaving you, Dad! I'm gonna visit you all the time! You're always gonna be my Dad. And you can always visit me when you have some free time, too.” You tried to comfort him by holding his hand as the both of you sit in your bed, in your bedroom

“I know. It's just not gonna be the same. And I'm gonna miss your beautiful human body. I'm gonna miss the girl I've raised since she was a little child.” You felt a stab in your heart. You honestly had not thought how much of a shock it would be to your dad to see your human body die. You felt a little selfish.

“She's still gonna be here.” You touched the place where your heart was, inside your chest “My soul will not change. I'm still gonna be me.” You looked into his eyes, trying to convince him of that

“I know. I just want you to be happy and if that's how you're gonna find your true happiness, I'd never try to be on your away.”

“Thank you, dad. I love you.” You hugged him and he felt a little better

You eventually broke the hug.

“I want you to come to my transferring of consciousness ceremony. Can you try and find some time on your busy scientist schedule to come and see your daughter wake up in her new body?”

“I wouldn't miss it for the world!” He gave you a supportive smile

The next step would be your transferring of consciousness ceremony. Mo'at seemed utterly happy to perform it. She wasn't that affectionate but you could read her feelings in her big amber eyes.

That night you slept in peace, knowing that the next time you would go to sleep again, you would be in your then permanent na'vi body and inside Neteyam's arms, your mate, the love of your life, probably making tsaheylu, as connected as you two could ever be. As one.

♡

Taglist:

@criticallybella

@yeosxxx

[jello-bbq]

Recovery

(Platonic! Tsu'tey x Avatar! Reader) (Platonic! Jake x Avatar! Reader)

They wake up to find they have nothing to recover from but are still constantly scolded for being reckless. Mo'at shares news that has them thinking of sharing their origins. (4.3 k)

Sorry this took so long I got sucked into another fandom for a bit. Also sorry that this prolly doesn't make sense bc it's 2 am rn and I fell asleep multiple times while writing this. Not proofread.

Nothing hurt. They realized that when they opened their eyes. No pain. No feeling. Nothing.

The hospital room looked bland.

"Tommy?" The name could only be whispered, and it sounded wrong as soon as it left their mouth.

No.

Slowly, they regained enough thought to realize.

They shook their head. Not Tommy.

Jake lay on a small portion of the bed, head resting on his hands. That's right. Jake. Not Tommy.

They tried to move again. This time they went slower, watching to see if Jake would wake up. He didn't. Even as their bare feet hit the tile and they made their way across the room.

But he did when the door slid open the barest inch, flinching awake. He called out their name, immediately realizing the situation. He called out again, panicked, turning to see their figure by the door.

"Are you- you're walking. You're alright?"

They could see the tiredness on his face. Lightening only slightly when they moved forward, watching them carefully as if trying to assess the damage they took.

"They said you'd be very disoriented when you wake up, you should sit down."

He guided them back to the bed. "They also said to press this button to call the doctors in-"

"Can we not?"

His finger hovers over the button.

"I mean, can I have a moment before all the doctors start rushing in and all."

"Of course, kid." A pause. He fiddles with the armrests of his wheelchair. "Do you remember what happened? The doctors said you might not since your uh... condition got activated. They said you went into combat mode."

"It's blurry," they admitted. The stillness of their thoughts concerned them. Mind awaiting a battlefield where the silence would allow them to process information quickly.

In the small hospital room, there was not enough information to process.

It felt silly. Like they were a toy. Combat mode. Condition. Illness. They felt so, formed. Like everything they were was carved from a blank slate and turned into a monstrosity. Each chunk removed. Each crack made. No thought behind each decision. None of it created by them. Just something directed. Something made. No choice but to lie back and take the beating. No choice but to live as what others have created.

Their thoughts falter when Jake begins to fill the silence. Talking about how Grace hovered over them and checked on them often, even fought multiple medical doctors. How Norm cried when he heard the news. How Tsu'tey didn't leave their side any longer than a few minutes.

And of their avatar.

"They brought it here to check the damage, Grace even said something about surgery. They got in a few scans before uh..." He watched them carefully as they nodded along. "Before Selfridge said no. Said you could handle a little poison and sent you back."

"He wasn't wrong I guess," they interrupted quietly, "but I'm surprised Grace went along with that."

"She wasn't gonna," he looked out the window, "but Mo'at said Eywa wanted you at hometree. Whatever that means."

Silence. Their head hurt from it.

"You've been taking your lessons?"

"Yeah. Nothing we could do but wait, try to learn."

They nodded. "You need to learn faster."

"What?"

They turned to him, taking in the slight confusion. He looked to be debating if the coma fucked up their brain further before they smiled. "I've had my first clean kill."

"You have not." He gaped.

They shrugged.

"That's awesome, kid! Look at you being the first ever avatar to get a clean kill." He ruffled their hair, pausing for a second. "I'll be the first to get an ikran."

They laughed. "In your dreams, white boy."

°•°•°•°•°•°•°•°

They decided to just call the doctors tomorrow. Or have them find out when they come to check on them. Whichever came first. Jake had fallen asleep on the side of the bed again, and they decided to pull him up to rest on it since they'd had more than their fair share of sleep.

The door opened and closed as they left, leaving behind Jake on the hospital bed who once again dreamed of flying.

They didn't exactly know what they were doing. The hallways were abandoned and dark.

The building looked completely deserted. The cafeteria empty as they walked past. Where were they going?

Everything felt blurred again. Muddled. Like their feet barely touched the floor and if someone saw them right now, they would be see-through. But still, they continued on. Walking to a destination they didn't know.

The next thing they knew, they were opening their eyes again. When had they closed them?

It took time for their eyes to adjust due to the dim light, like in the hospital room. Except this light looked clearly different. It looked alive. Streaming in through the gaps between the floor and tarp, they could swear the light pulsed softly. Steadily. A heartbeat unheard.

Why were they in their avatar?

They checked their wounds, remembering the palulukans. The arrows. Their first kill. All that they told Jake in the hospital room, eventually lulling him to sleep.

Their body looked fine. Aside from bandages around their waist. Nothing hurt here either.

Someone called out their name.

They turned, body tensing, arms raising.

"You are awake?"

"Tsu'tey?"

A breath of relief. A prayer to Eywa. A hug.

They hugged back, the warmth momentarily overtaking their mind.

Tsu'tey broke the hug first. He pulled back and looked them in the eyes. "Idiot child."

"Wow, big thing to say to someone who saved your life, hey?"

He gently slapped their forehead. "If you do something as reckless that again, I will kill you myself."

They smiled. "You're welcome."

"I will get Zeyko."

They wanted to say no, like before with Jake. But this was different.

Their avatar actually sustained physical damage. A lot of it. So they watched Tsu'tey go, using the time to finish assessing their wounds.

The bandages wrapped all around their back. Healing paste still looked fresh on some flesh wounds around their wounds. Other than that they looked okay. At least those stupid experiments had some merit.

Tsu'tey returned quickly with Zeyko, who brought a basket of something.

"You are finally awake, you will be a formidable warrior."

They returned the hug when her arms wrapped around them, avoiding the bandages on their back.

"But I will take you down myself if you continue to be so reckless."

Zeyko insisted on checking the bandages to see if anything split when they got up. Tsu'tey left to give the two privacy.

Her hand brushed against their side, and even with their back facing her, they could see the look on her face. The same look she always has whenever they'd get hurt.

"You always heal so quickly", she pointed out, "is it because of the Skypeople blood in your veins?"

They shrugged, not really in the mood to get into the whole child experiment by a government agency thing.

Zeyko seemed to understand, putting more paste on their back before rewrapping it. "By tomorrow I will be able to take this off. Try not to get into worse trouble by then."

They said goodbye as she disappeared through the flap, Tsu'tey reappearing not a few seconds later.

Tsu'tey insisted that they rest 'even in your other form' he said, laying them slowly down on the bed. "Nothing hurts?"

They shook their head. "How about you? You hit your head pretty hard."

For a moment, they think they spot a flash of embarrassment. "I am fine."

"Those palulukans felt particularly fierce," they said, letting Tsu'tey drape the blanket over them. "Why were they near that spot anyway? It's pretty rare for them to go so far, right?"

He stopped patting down the blanket, taking a seat beside the bed. "Mo'at has declared it a sign. A warning." His eyes find theirs. "Of what, we are not sure."

Maybe it was presumptuous. To think that they would be enough for Eywa to send a warning to the people. But they think it anyway, only for a short moment as Tsu'tey stands.

"Now go, you should rest."

They nod, knowing they can't argue their way out. "Goodnight."

A reply is heard faintly when they close their eyes, traveling through the neural link, and opening them to the sight of the pod's padded insides.

No one is in the lab still. They make sure to turn off the pod from the control room, not even remembering how they turned it on in the first place.

Jake is still there on the bed when they return to the room. He seems to not have moved at all.

They watch him, studying the bags under his eyes. If they'd been asleep three days, they were sure he hardly slept at all. At least from how tired he looked.

The silence didn't bother them now, having been calmed down by friends. Enough for their mind to deem it safe and exit combat mode.

They find the stack of yogurt cups in the fridge, smiling to themselves. Jake could not have filled the tiny fridge by himself. Not with three days worth of food. Nine meals.

They counted the cups which were arranged in neat lines. Norm's doing, no doubt. 23 yogurt cups.

The sight reminds them of hunger and it is as if the thought triggers their body, their stomach rumbling.

The first doctor who opens the room early in the morning is met with a strange sight. A marine sleeping in the hospital cot. The patient sleeping in a wheelchair, resting their head on the bed. And multiple cups of yogurt stacked by the bedside.

Grace and Norm visit when the news spreads that they are awake.

"You had us scared for a second there kid," Grace says warmly, even while watching the nurse who is trying to stick a needle into their vein for a blood sample. Her piercing gaze making the poor guy tremble.

Jake had also glared when he saw the needle, but someone called him out. They heard something about Quaritch.

Norm speaks up, also glaring at the nurse. "I'm surprised you aren't still sick. How did you eat 23 cups of yogurt in one go?"

"I was hungry." They shrugged with one arm, trying to keep the other still. "And I like yogurt."

"Never doubted that second part."

"How was your little rendezvous yesterday?"

They look up at Grace, who smiled. "You don't think we have cameras in there? How else will I know if anyone spits in my coffee?"

They smile slightly. "It felt okay. The body's fine. I had a few wounds but I'm getting the bandages removed tomorrow." They left out Zeyko and Tsu'tey, and Tsu'tey's words about the palulukans being a warning.

The three nodded, listening intently.

"What else?" Norm asks when they don't continue.

"What?" A pause. "I have a scratch on my right arm- or left. Right, I think-"

"He means your other injuries."

Another pause. "What injuries?"

The two look at each other, and Norm decides to explain. "When we brought you here you were in really rough shape. You had deep gashes in your back. I thought I could see your spine."

"What else?"

Grace replies this time. "A broken left arm. Shattered your wrist almost completely. You had a linear fracture on your skull."

"Is that bad?"

"Not fatally, but you should have been closely monitored."

"I think I was," they said. "Zeyko said she checked on me often."

Grace nodded, looking thoughtful. "That's nice."

"But-" Norm intervened "you're saying you only have scratches now? How is that-" He paused, realizing they all knew how. "Is that possible? Physically?"

They all turn to the nurse who has finally finished drawing the blood. He seems to realize they are asking him. "It's- it could be. With a regular human, no. But since it's your avatar and it's..."

Not regular, they assumed.

"It's possible especially since the Na'vi have stronger bodies."

Norm nodded, which the nurse took as a cue to go, leaving quickly and almost dropping the blood vial.

Another doctor came in soon after, declaring the fit to leave. Their avatar had taken all the injuries anyway.

Grace lead the way to the lab and Max hugs them upon their entrance. "They didn't tell me they were saving their yogurt cups, I only found out yesterday so I could only get two."

They smile. "It's fine, thank you."

"It's not fine," Norm said, standing beside Max. He stage whispers, "they ate all the yogurt as soon as they woke up."

"I did not."

Norm raised a brow.

"It was a little after I woke up, technically."

Max only chuckled, patting their back and prepping the pod. "Doctor cleared you for this?"

"'Course she did." The familiar feeling of gel padding immediately relaxing them. "They think I'm indestructible."

They don't miss the concerned glint in his eyes when they say that.

"But I have a feeling if I ever start a pod unauthorized again Grace will put that to the test."

Max continued pressing more buttons, grinning. "And Selfridge would be furious if he found out. Guy's been extra insufferable lately."

"An asshole's gonna be an asshole."

He smiled as the lid closed, and then their eyes were opening again.

They get up, shaking their head lightly. The light is shining through the gaps again. Morning light.

It took longer to take the doctor's clearance than they thought. They spotted the bed beside them, empty. Perhaps Tsu'tey got tired of waiting for them to wake again.

When they open the tent flap, they gaze upon an unfamiliar part of hometree. Somewhere secluded. Of course, they thought. A sick skyperson can be nowhere near the people.

Even so, they take a step outside. The moss under their feet feels like home. The sunlight on their skin.

The animals way below, their calls making it to their ears, which twitched as they tried to pick out specific sounds.

The forest looked welcoming, but they settle for the branches, not wanting to stray too far.

They lay on one of the branches. Breathing in. Breathing out. Watching the light filter through the leaves.

Like that, they could forget the blur of memories they couldn't quite remember.

When they stayed still long enough, it felt like they could hear it. Feel it. The energy that connected everything. The power. Each breath borrowed. Each life tied to an end.

It felt nice to fill their head with such thoughts and feelings, instead of war or injury.

As if out of spite, a shot of pain rips through their leg. It makes them shoot up and grab at it. But it is gone as quickly as it appeared.

A reminder, they think.

"There you are."

They turn, seeing Mo'at approaching them. They stand, bowing and greeting her.

"Oel Nga'ti Kameie, Tsahik."

She returned the gesture. "You are walking so soon after your injuries, does it not hurt?"

"No."

"And yet I saw you hiss as if in pain just now."

Their eyes find the ground. They didn't lie but they had yet to explain anything about her condition to any Na'vi. Not Mo'at or Zeyko or Tsu'tey or Neytiri. No one.

"It is different, I am well."

Her piercing eyes study theirs. "If you say so. Sit, we must talk."

Oh, they think as they follow her words and sit back down. She's here to talk about the warning.

Just as they think it, Mo'at confirms.

"Eywa has told me of your bravery in response to her warning. She has talked to you."

They don't remember anything like that, but somehow they know the answer is yes.

"The warning, she cannot say what of. It will impact our future too strongly if we know."

They nod along. Were they enough to have that big an impact?

"She has told me something else."

They look up at her, and she is watching them with a softer gaze. She says something that shocks them. Halting their thoughts. Like the information got stuck between the cogs of their brain.

She leaves with a smile. They don't know how long it is until they stand and make their way back to the tent. But her words ring in their mind.

"Unbelievable", they think aloud.

"What is?"

They look up. Tsu'tey stands in front of the tent, two bowls in his hands.

"Nothing. Is that for me?"

He nods, motioning them into the tent. There he tells them to sit down and hands them a bowl. Talioang meat. Their favorite.

"I've been told you haven't been hunting lately."

Another flash of embarrassment. Brief, but clearly there. "I did today."

They nodded, taking the carved husk and gratefully scarfing down its contents. Tsu'tey ate carefully in contrast.

Still, as soon as their mind wandered they were pulled again to those words. Mo'at had really surprised them. They went to tell Tsu'tey when he spoke first.

"I would like to show you something today, if that is fine."

What could he be planning to show them? They obviously hadn't seen everything the forest had to offer, but what was so new that he had to ask to show it to them?

"Sure, that'd be nice."

They ate in silence, Tsu'tey taking the bowls after. Just as he left, the flap was opened, and in came Jake, grinning. Sweat stuck to his skin and he breathed heavily. It was clear that he ran from one of Neytiri's lessons to check on them.

He kept his questions quick, looking like he kept a mental count of the seconds to know when he should head back. And he did after around two minutes, calling out a "just wait! I'll get my clean kill in no time!"

Zeyko arrived just a little after that, all soft smiles and lilting laughs. She carefully unbandaged them as if they were gravely ill, inspecting their back to make sure the wounds were healed. Then she excused herself, talking about a direhorse accident that needed to be attending to.

When she left, they exited the tent again, going back to the branch they'd previously laid on. Maybe they should've felt restless, having had three days of deep sleep. But all they felt was tired.

It scared them to sleep. Maybe they would go back into a coma if they did. Was that how those worked?

Even so, as they stared up at the leaves drifting with the wind, they found themselves falling asleep.

This time, Tsu'tey found them. Sleeping on a patch of moss bathed in sunlight. He almost didn't want to wake them. But they woke without him doing anything.

Eyes blinking open and brows furrowing in confusion when they see they are outside.

"You should not be sleeping here, you could fall." He extended a hand. "It is a long way down."

The two began the walk back to the tent in silence.

They brushed the sleep from their eyes, shaking their head as if rattling their thoughts back into place. After a while, they realized they would have already passed the tent, looking around and seeing that they were being led elsewhere.

Tall ferns brushed against their arms, getting thicker and thicker as they went.

Tsu'tey kept to a small track, woven through the plants with care, looking back every so often to check that they still followed.

It felt familiar. And they realized it was. They had taken this path once before, hadn't they?

They were about to ask when they nearly bumped into Tsu'tey's back.

"Sorry."

He said nothing and stepped aside to show a particularly large fern leaf, then he pulled it aside to reveal an alcove.

An indent in the tree. Wide and deep enough to lie down comfortably.

He guided them to it, and the two sat there in comfortable silence. After three days, they could finally continue their daily activity. Watching the eclipse take place.

Darkness slowly but surely enveloping the forest. Casting its shadow over everything.

There is a moment of true darkness. A short moment, before the world lit up again. A light of its own. Scattered colors shining and almost twinkling.

An entirely different world in just a few seconds. All from the comfort of the alcove, which shielded them from the cool night air.

They had a lot of questions but voiced none of them. Silence felt fitting. They didn't understand the significance of the alcove, but they felt like he had shown them something intimate. Like he had told them something that he had never told anyone else. And they wondered why he would do that.

Because they saved his life?

No that wasn't it. There was something else.

They don't know why. But something in them is reeling to talk. To finally tell someone what they are.

Maybe because of Mo'at's words and how, if they didn't tell anybody now, telling them later would be more of a betrayal. What were Mo'at's words? Prepare yourself, you wil soon have your iknimaya.

"Do you remember when Zeyko asked why I bleed so much?"

He glanced at them, confused by the sudden question, but nodded anyway. "You said people do not enjoy hearing why."

"They don't. It's not - it isn't something they understand easily."

This seemed to pique his interest.

They begin to wonder if they should say it. But if they didn't, and what Mo'at said would happen happened. Without anyone knowing that they were unnatural. Only shipped to Pandora for the barest chance of them being useful in keeping the Na'vi in line.

So they do say it. Starting from the beginning. From how they were made from DNA of fallen soldiers. To how they were raised in a bunker, exposed to experiments that burned information into their head. To how they were freed, only to end up in a larger cage.

How the RDA bought them like a piece of equipment. Right off the government's hands. Hoping to make use of their knowledge in the fight starting on Pandora.

How they built them an avatar and locked them in it for days to experiment on their human body, and vice versa.

All the horrors of their past.

How they all lead to them on Pandora to fight against the people, not learn from them as they had been doing.

When they finished, they went quiet. Allowing him time to process. Preparing themselves for the chance of him pushing them over the edge to get rid of another annoyance.

This was selfish of them after all. To share their sob story and tack in the addition of them being a possible weapon against the people.

"You should not have come to my aid."

They balk. What? It's as if he hears the question and continues.

"I am a warrior. A warrior should protect, not be protected."

They don't protest, too confused by his words.

"You said you are a warrior, you are not. A human child cannot be a warrior." The words come with a frost to them.

He stares ahead now as if he is still replaying the sunset and eclipse in his mind. Turning back time to that moment in the forest with his arrow against their chest. Maybe he imagines he lets go of the bowstring, and the pain is eradicated then and there.

"It is hard to believe. You are all smaller, softer, and yet violent and cowardly. Hiding away in metal contraptions." Oh. They understood now. "How can a skyperson, a child, risk their life for another? If it was that easy-"

His words were confused. Anger and confusion. Anger and sadness. It all led to this. The teaching. The begrudging acquaintanceship. Skypeople had taken too much from him. Too much. And yet they dared give him something in return. They dare save him.

"You lie and you steal and you cannot be taught. But a child-" He shakes his head slightly. "Why is a child a warrior? Why does a child risk their life?"

They dare let a child save him. A child, of all things. After all of it, they dare send a child to soften his heart.

And maybe he felt angry at himself, too. For needing to be saved. For being caught by surprise. And for letting their little ploy work. For feeling scared for the skyperson, as if their people hadn't killed his without mercy.

This is why he hated any sort of relationship. They always had to be complicated by love or hate or anything.

Granted, this surely presented itself as an outlier in its complexity. The next Na'vi to lead the people growing to care for the one the enemy with an inkling to destroy them.

The people he hated so much. The one he tried to treat like a sibling after many months of resistance, thinking that after those months they are different.

But they are not.

They are the same.

They are worse.

But in his moment of betrayal, he thinks of the night before.

When they woke up, he stayed to watch them go back to sleep before leaving. Walking to the tree of voices.

He talked to Sylwanin there. About the dreamwalker. About how he had grown to care for them and felt conflicted. Like he had betrayed the people.

She comforted him, but when he asked for advice she gave her usual words. That others wiser than her still lived. But she said something else.

"Children are children because they are growing. Grace Augustine told me that, it seemed so obvious." She laughed softly. "Perhaps your skyperson can grow to be one of the people. A child should not be blamed for what they were born to be, do you not think?"

He looks at the child beside him. A child. He had been thinking of them as a child the whole time, why did he suddenly think differently when they told him? As if they intentionally deceived him. And the People. The Tsahik. The Olo'eyktan.

"A child should not be blamed for what they were born to be," he says, repeating her words in the cool air, "or for what they have endured."

Tag list:

@rebeccao03 @eywas-heir

[luminari-mc]

My Human, My Sunshine - Part 1

Genre: Angst, hurt/comfort.

Pairing: GN!MC x Mammon

Word count: 5194

Summary: Mammon finds himself lost in the human world. Meanwhile, MC can't get ahold of Solomon, their phone dead silent.

Warnings: N/A

A/N: My first writing piece for Obey Me! It's kind of a long one so I recommend you grab a snack or two during it. While this part is occupied by a good amount of text messages between Mammon and someone else, I'm already thinking of writing a part 2 which will have way more dialogue. In the meantime, please enjoy this little scenario I came up with after listening to a song that set me in an angsty mood. :)

______________________________________________________

Wet. Cold. Exhausted. And completely lost.

Mammon felt all of those, and yet, his legs kept on marching into the dead of night, his jacket covering his head despite being too drenched to protect him from the rain anymore. Each time a droplet of water came rolling on his cheek, his wrist would come to brush it off, and Mammon would let out an annoyed groan. If only there were any shops open, but the city was definitely asleep. He was thankful for the crashing sound of the rain on the ground around him, along with the smell of the wet asphalt keeping himself awake, otherwise, he surely would have gone crazy by now. The demon had even lost count of how many hours he had been wandering through the streets, how many mailboxes he had checked, how few passersby he had come across, only to receive negative answers to his questions.

And so Mammon kept on walking, not sure where to go next. But he felt sure of one thing: he wouldn't stop moving until he had found what he was looking for. Be there rain, or no rain. Lost or not.

"Tch, the human world's weather really sucks..."

As he walked on the pavement, his brow furrowed from the lack of new clues as to where his destination was supposed to be. His eyes caught sight of a bakery he had already walked by earlier during the day, its gentle light piercing the darkness that had been accompanying him for far too long now. Mammon's brow furrowed slightly at the sight- he knew he had gone in circles time and time again, but seeing it confirmed once more rubbed him the wrong way. Despite that, he decided to walk towards it, and took shelter under the entrance's porch. Surely the owners wouldn't mind him checking his phone for a few minutes, right? Right.

Pinching between his fingers the precious D.D.D. he had tucked under his shirt to protect it from the rain, Mammon looked at the map again. His stomach dropped for the upteenth time upon seeing the address still showing in his search bar, the letters and numbers taunting him. A knot formed in his throat as he tried his best not to scream at his screen.

"It wasn't there, you idiot..."

His mouth formed into an angry pout. Mammon looked into the list of potential addresses he had made throughout the day, and all had been crossed out. He felt his jaw clench- not only was he left with no addresses, no other clues, no humans to help him, but also that stupid rain surely would keep on falling for the rest of the night.

He was truly cursed.

"What the fuck am I supposed to do now?!" Mammon groaned, his free hand reaching upward to grab at his hair in frustration.

Yes... that was a good question. What was he supposed to do? It wasn't like he could ask help from any of his brothers, or from the angels. It had already been a miracle a witch he knew accepted to snuck him into the human world without anyone knowing, but there was no way he'd get any more help from her without offering his own life in exchange. And contacting Solomon was absolutely out of the question, for his own obvious reasons that he still was suspicious of the guy.

For the longest time in a while, Mammon felt alone. More alone than he had ever been before. He had promised himself to go on this search on his own, stupidly thinking that it'd be over by the end of the day, and look where that got him. Lost in the human world, on the verge of catching some nasty human virus from all this rain that had poured on him, and without anyone by his side.

The grip on his phone tightened, the hand holding it shaking slightly as the anger was starting to consume the demon. Even Mammon's patience had its limits, and he was starting to reach it.

"Dammit, where the hell are ya-"

A pathetic yelp escaped his mouth as he looked in fear at his phone, which had buzzed for a very short second in his palm. Wait, was it a notification? But from who? He had taken all the necessary precautions before leaving, so who was still able to reach his number?

His mind ran through all possibilities as he quickly checked his screen, the name of the sender making him open his eyes wide.

Leviathan: Mammon!!

Leviathan: Where are you???

Leviathan: You promised me you'd play this new game with me after coming home from RAD, don't tell me you forgot?? It's been HOURS.

Leviathan: Also the others say they can't reach your DDD and Lucifer is seriously pissed!

Leviathan: And I know you didn't break your DDD, that wouldn't explain why I can send texts now and the others still can't. Even though mine didn't work before.

Leviathan: But do you know how much time and effort it took me to find a way to bypass a blocked number?? Well guess what, the same amount of hours since you broke your promise!

Leviathan: You're reading this, right? Then send something! Anything!

Mammon backed even more into the porch of the shop, his eyes stuck to the screen of his phone. All of the blood rushing to his head suddenly made him forget he was cold in the first place. Of course Levi would be the first to find a way to contact him.

The demon's chest rose as he breathed in heavily, his hands slowly wrapping around the phone. It took him a hot minute to get ahold of his trembling fingers so as to not make any typos, his mind debating whether responding was a good idea or not, even as he hit the send button.

Mammon: Sorry Levi, gonna have to postpone the gaming session.

Mammon: I got business elsewhere and I'm not sure when I'll come back home, if ever.

Leviathan: Ew stop sounding so gloomy, you're almost starting to sound like me and tbh it would be kinda creepy.

Leviathan: That still doesn't tell me where you are! I know it's like a common thing for you to get into shady stuff on a regular basis but even Lucifer seems concerned, and weirdly enough he's not even trying to hide it???

Leviathan: He's been pacing back and forth in the common room for 20 minutes and won't let go of his phone it's starting to creep me out.

Leviathan: Hey huh, if you really were in big trouble you'd let us know, right? Like, even by typing a secret message to let us know that you got kidnapped or whatever?

Leviathan: Nevermind, I really don't see why you'd even get kidnapped, so it HAS to be that you chose to disappear by yourself.

Leviathan: But anyway! It's been 2 months now since everyone's been acting weird and I've seen and heard you enough to CLEARLY see that you're getting worse but finding trouble with witches or whatever won't help you feel better. And yes I know you've been faking being fine the entire time!! Don't think you can fool me!!

Leviathan: Believe me and the hundreds of figurines I bought!! I thought they'd help and it's somehow doing nothing, I feel like the worst fraud of an otaku EVER!!! How can I call myself an otaku when I can't even find joy anymore in the things that make an otaku what he is??

Leviathan: It's like I'm losing my identity! Wait no screw that, it's not just me, we've all been losing it!!

The three dots of a message being typed disappeared and reappeared, and Mammon couldn't do anything but watch the messages of his brother pop up one after another on his screen. A sense of guilt surfaced inside of him, and it only made him frown. It's not as if he hadn't thought about asking Levi for help, before getting himself into this mess... but for both of their sakes, he had decided that it had to be him coming here, and only him.

But suddenly, just as he expected his brother to send another message, the three dots disappeared, and didn't come back right away. Mammon's focus on his phone increased at the unexplained absence of new texts from Levi, and he waited, expecting him to continue the chain of messages he had started. But nothing followed.

It wasn't in Levi's habits to suddenly stop texting in the middle of a flood of texts. The demon gripped his phone tighter, worry beginning to grow within his mind. Was it because they were in different worlds that their phones couldn't reach properly? Or worse- had Lucifer found him out?

His heart almost skipped a beat as the three dots reappeared under his eyes, before letting another message pop up.

Leviathan: wait

Leviathan: waitwaitwaitwaitwaitwait

Leviathan: OMG NO WAY

Leviathan: MAMMON TELL ME YOU'RE KIDDING

Mammon: I literally haven't said anything?

Leviathan: YOU PERFECTLY KNOW WHAT I'M TALKING ABOUT

Leviathan: DON'T TELL ME YOU'RE IN THE HUMAN WORLD RN??

Shit.

How did he even find out?! Well... he could only assume that it wouldn't take a genius to figure out where Mammon could have gone if not anywhere in the Devildom, but still, why did Levi have to type it out? His plan was supposed to be flawless after all.

Mammon: Sorry bro, I can't say where I am.

Mammon: I know Lucifer's bound to check all of your DDDs sooner or later and that's only gonna help him find me.

Mammon: And like I said, I have something to do, so I can't come back.

Leviathan: Wait! I'll delete all of our messages, and I'll even destroy my DDD if it means you tell me why you're there

Leviathan: Actually no don't even answer, there can only be one reason you took that kind of risk

Leviathan: Is it... because of MC?

Upon reading their name again, Mammon felt his stomach sink. The eyes of the Avatar of Greed closed almost instantly as if to avoid reading it, the damp air whistling through his teeth as he breathed in deeply. Of course Levi would figure that out too. Any of his brothers could have.

The demon leaned his head against the wall behind him, his eyes opening and staring into nothing as he contemplated telling Levi about his plan. It wasn't as if he had any backup plans considering the situation he was in, after all. And Levi had the advantage of being at home, and having access to technology and magic that could improve his search further. But the thought of Lucifer figuring everything out still haunted him, making the hair on his skin stand straight.

And yet... At this point, he had nothing else to lose.

Mammon: Ya gotta promise not to tell anyone about this.

Leviathan: Who do you take me for? I'm not a snitch!

Leviathan: Especially if it's about MC.

Leviathan: But huh... what about Lucifer? You know that if when he finds out you went to the human world, he's going to kill you.

Mammon: Fuck Lucifer.

Mammon: I'm tired of hearin' him say he's "taking care of it". He clearly knows something but won't tell any of us and I'm tired of not getting any news from MC since they left the Devildom 2 months ago.

Mammon: And what's with his excuse about them not havin' their DDD anymore to contact us? I call that a load of bullshit.

Mammon: Something weird happened and Lucifer's too stuck-up to let us know what it is.

Mammon: So I'm done waiting around to see when they'll come back, or IF they'll even come back. So I'm going to get them myself.

Mammon: Problem is, I went to MC's place, and they weren't there. Their neighbor told me that they moved out a while ago with, get this, "a guy with white hair".

Leviathan: ??????? Solomon?????

Mammon: I'd bet my Demonio and all the things I possess that it's him.

Mammon: Not only Lucifer's in on this secret thing about MC, but Solomon too. I've already booked him an appointment with my fists if he did anythin' to them.

Mammon: Hell, even Diavolo and Barbatos seem to be in it too, which sucks even bigger time.

Mammon: So that means it's just us 6 who don't know shit. I wasn't about to play nice and dumb for Lucifer any longer.

Leviathan: Mammon

Leviathan: I never thought I'd ever write something like that to YOU

Leviathan: but

Leviathan: you sound super cool rn!! That just makes me wish I could have gone too!!

Leviathan: Pleasepleaseplease let me help!!! I'm also worried about MC and I miss having them here. The atmosphere at the house has sucked ever since we realized we couldn't text or call them anymore and I huh... kinda miss seeing them around the others too.

For a split second, Mammon considered taking a screenshot of Levi's last message to sell it as "the proof that the Avatar of Envy can control his jealousy!", but now wasn't the time for that. He had Levi's approval for helping him find the whereabouts of MC, and that's all he needed at the moment. He hadn't even noticed his lips turning into a small grin upon reading his brother offering his support.

Mammon: Alright Levi listen.

Mammon: All I'm tryin' right now is to find where MC might be.

Mammon: I don't think they left the place I'm at, but I ain't about to search at every damn house there is here. Would take too much time anyway.

Mammon: So can ya use your shut-in powers and figure somethin' out? Like I don't know, catch their human phone's signal or whatever through hacking?

Leviathan: Lol? I'll let you know it's not because I spend my entire days in my room that I know how to find a human phone!

Leviathan: I know how to hack yeah, but I don't know how to hack human technology! Not that I maybe tried once or twice and it resulted in failure each time.

Leviathan: But huh... I could try?

Leviathan: Let me ask Satan if we could use magic too.

Mammon: Satan? Levi, are you stupid? Last thing we want is to get more people to know about what I'm doing.

Leviathan: Oh huh yeaaaah, about that.

Leviathan: I should have told you sooner, but when I stopped answering earlier it's because Satan caught me texting you.

Leviathan: But he actually knew you had left to the human world! So we don't have to worry! He's on our side... obviously.

Mammon: Then the two of you get on it.

Mammon: And don't catch Lucifer's attention.

Leviathan: Yeah!

Leviathan: I'll let you know when we've found something.

Leviathan: BRB!

And then just like earlier, Levi's texts stopped appearing on his screen. A sigh left Mammon's lips as he closed his eyes, and the demon allowed his body to slide against the wall behind him until he was sitting on the ground. As he stretched out his sore body, the second-born finally realized that after two whole months of not getting to hear MC's voice, seeing their smile, getting to touch them... he had gotten closer to finding them, all thanks to his brothers. He had let Lucifer's intimidation get the best of him throughout all this time, but not anymore. No matter whether his older brother would catch wind of where he was, and what he was doing, Mammon would never stop trying to bring back MC where they belonged. With him, in the Devildom, back with the family they had found and grown to love.

Closing the messaging app with his thumb, the picture of MC he had set as his D.D.D. background seemed to radiate like the sun. How dared them all try to separate his human from their first man? From the one who'd they come to whenever they had a nightmare and couldn't fall asleep? The demon who'd hug them as tight as possible in their bed after a long day at RAD? The one who'd had the chance to fall asleep with them, getting the absolute honor of seeing their face so close to his, and who'd protect their dreams from any bad thoughts and scary nightmares?

The anxiety that Mammon had worn on his face all day slowly disappeared, and a small smile was placed upon it instead as his eyes met MC's in the picture.

"I'm almost there. Ya just gotta be patient a little more."

I'll find ya.

Time went on as Mammon waited for any news of Levi and Satan's research. The rain showed no sign of clearing soon, and the demon was starting to doze off after spending his entire day without taking a single break. He could have almost fallen asleep if it hadn't been for the owner of the bakery opening the door to close his shop and asking him to sit somewhere else. So Mammon moved from one spot to another, and took shelter near another store instead.

After what seemed like an eternity of waiting on the stone steps he had sat on, his phone's screen flashed a bright light as a new notification from Levi appeared from the top. Quickly passing his wrist on his tired eyes, Mammon tapped on the new message at the speed of light. The contents made him gasp, and for a second, he had almost forgotten how to breathe, as his now wide-open eyes were glued on the content of the message.

A full-on address, along with a picture of the place.

Mammon instantly stood up at the sight of the picture, the memories of his day resurfacing in a flash. He remembered very clearly seeing this particular building sometime during his search- its height had been making it stand out very easily amongst the other buildings in the city. Nobody couldn't mistake it with anything else.

Mammon: This is it?

Leviathan: Yeah, we placed down a map and confirmed it was there.

Leviathan: Satan actually found a book in his room with a spell that can help find a person's specific item with just some of their DNA.

Leviathan: So we went to MC's room and found some hair that Satan used for the spell, along with his phone so it could narrow down the list of MC's items.

Leviathan: I didn't think Satan's room could look even more of a mess, but he spent 10 minutes shoveling through his collection and now you can't even see the floor or his bed anymore lol

Leviathan: Anyway now that you got what you wanted, go and check if MC is there!

Mammon felt his legs move on their own as he flipped his jacket above his head and stepped under the rain again, a confident grin now brightly adorning his face as he typed on his phone to reply.

Mammon: Thanks Levi. I'll owe ya one.

Leviathan: Find MC and bring them back. Then you can consider us even.

Mammon nodded, a newfound hope filling his entire body and mind. After confirming that Levi had ceased texting him, the demon turned the phone off. He opened his hand to drop it on the wet floor, and let his right foot crash down upon it, the object almost breaking in half. Mammon promptly gathered in his hand the shattered item, now completely unusable, and threw it down a nearby sewer before letting his excitement take the best of him and sprint further in the direction of the building from the picture. At least, now Lucifer wouldn't be able to track him down with it if Levi and Satan got caught.

The more distance he covered, the more Mammon could swear he was about to take on his demon form at any moment. The thoughts of MC began to fill his head even more, as if they were the one pushing him to find them, to get to them as soon as possible. For the first time in 2 months, Mammon felt truly alive.

"Almost there. The Great Mammon's coming for ya, MC!!" he let out in the form of an encouragement to himself, his legs having found their energy again as his form was engulfed further into the city.

. . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . .

Anxiously pacing around the room, their head low and their phone in their hands, MC was growing more and more impatient. They were supposed to receive an update from Solomon about three hours earlier in the form of a phone call, but no matter the amount of messages they'd spent in the hopes of the wizard finally answering them, all they received was a dreadful silence. Grabbing a nearby chair, they let their body fall onto the seat as their fingers typed yet another message. They couldn't really understand how they had come to grow so persistent when it came to getting Solomon to reply to them, but having no other person to talk to ever since they left the Devildom 2 months prior would do that to anyone, they assumed.

'Solomon, sorry, I know I'm sending a lot of texts, but you said you'd visit today and I'm starting to be worried and... honestly a bit lonely. I thought going out today would help, but I just sat in the park for an hour before going back home and not doing much of the day.'

'You were supposed to meet with other wizards today, right? I hope nothing bad happened. But in case you're alright, all I'm asking is just one reply to at least get some sort of human connection. Not that I had a lot of it in the past few months.'

They felt their throat tighten upon writing their last sentence, feeling the frustration spilling out of their own words right back into their face. But who could blame them?

2 months without seeing, hearing, or even texting their friends back in the Devildom. 2 months without receiving a single visit from Luke or Simeon. 2 months spent exclusively with the company of Solomon, who had been acting strange ever since and had made them move out of their home under the excuse that it was to "train them at magic in a more private setting". But more importantly... those had been 2 months without having Mammon around, and MC would lie if they said they hadn't spent several nights crying themself to sleep, wondering how the demon was dealing with their absence.

The memories of their latest departure from the Devildom played in their head like a movie as they placed a hand on their forehead. Everything had seemed alright at the time, with them getting to say their usual goodbyes to the brothers, wishing to see them again once the new year at RAD would start, foolishly thinking that they'd get to spend their time hearing their voices on a daily basis once they were back in the human world. And before they could understand, their DDD had been taken from them, Solomon had been more present in their life than ever before, and for a reason they still couldn't grasp, it was as if the brothers had vanished from their life completely. No news whatsoever. Complete radio silence.

Just thinking back to this period, and how they could have probably caught that something was up as soon as Diavolo asked for their DDD after the brothers had left... it just made them want to puke.

But nothing could make them want to do so as much as the long-awaited reply of Solomon appearing on their screen.

'Hi MC. I'm deeply sorry I couldn't get ahold of you throughout the day. I won't be able to visit you today, since my services are still required here. Besides, it's getting late. I recommend you go have a good night's sleep as soon as possible.'

'If everything goes smoothly, I should be able to come back tomorrow. Then, we'll be able to go walk wherever you want. How does that sound?'

'I need to be going, but I shall wish you a good night. Take care, MC.'

And just as quickly as he had answered, Solomon went silent again. Leaving them in this apartment they had grown to hate, this prison cell he had put them in. A place where no fun could be found for them. MC didn't even bother sending anything else after that.

Their head sunk even lower, until their forehead slowly met with the hard surface of the dinner table. The phone faceplanted onto the wood as MC's hands turned into hard fists, a deep groan shaking the walls of their throat. It was hard not to let the tears escape their eyes, but instead, they opted to punch the table several times as hard as they could, until they felt their anger diminish.

How long was Solomon going to act ignorant towards them? How long was he going to ignore their pleas to get news from the Devildom, anything that would let them know why they couldn't contact the brothers, Diavolo and Barbatos? Even if the lords had been in some sort of trouble... they'd still find time to talk to their human, right? There was no way Mammon, the one they loved, wouldn't try to reach them one way or another... right?

Him who had been so clingy in such an adorable way every time they'd be at the House of Lamentation, he who had revealed to them that there wasn't a single day where his thoughts wouldn't drift to them no matter how hard he tried...

No. No amount of important duties would explain why Mammon of all demons, would ignore them like that.

They missed his antics. His entire being. The warmth he'd bring them each time he'd hold their hand before tucking his face into their neck like a pouting child, desperately trying to sneak one or two kisses in there, in the hopes he'd get to hear that sweet giggle of them. It wasn't for nothing that Lucifer had come to name them the chaotic duo of the House of Lamentation. They were two parts of a whole.

And yet, the world had dared to separate them. And MC was tired, oh so tired of not having their other half near them. The only feeling they had left, was one of pure desperation to see their greedy demon.

"I'm not asking for much... even a single word would do." MC replied to no one as they turned their head to rest their cheek onto the table. They closed their eyes, the anger slowly being replaced by a profound exhaustion. Could they really do nothing but act normal around Solomon, and accept that this was now their new life? No demons, no angels, just... humans around them?

Before they could slap the thought away, a loud banging coming from the entrance door made them straighten in their seat, their head turning towards the hallway in a panic. Their heart pounded inside their chest as the banging seemed to go on forever, until they used the back of their chair to push themself up, their legs shaking.

"S...Solomon?" They asked, way too silently for anyone to hear, and fully knowing that the person behind the door couldn't be the wizard.

As if they were waiting for an answer, MC stood there, their hand grasped onto the chair. The banging was insistent, demanding, angry. At this time of night, there were few reasons they could think why someone would mistreat their door in such a way, and MC wasn't sure they wanted to find the reason for it.

That is, until the person behind the door finally let their voice be heard.

"Oi, MC! Ya can hear me right?! Come on, open the door!"

It didn't take long for MC to let the familiar voice enter their ears, and it took less time for them to nearly stumble over the chair as their legs moved in a hurry to lead them towards the door as quickly as possible. Their hands messily trying to open the locks on the door, they were sure their mind had just played a trick on them, and the person outside was going to leave them completely disappointed, but they didn't care. This voice they could only remember so well despite the time since they had last heard it, was simply inviting them to open the door, to check for themselves whether it was true, or just a nasty joke played by their brain.

But as the last lock was undone, and the door was swung open, MC couldn't do anything but just stand there, their mouth agape.

Mammon kept on drawing breaths, his wet hair stuck to his forehead and drops of rain falling from his clothes onto the floor below, so much so that it had started to create a small puddle underneath him. As if the person who opened the door wasn't the one he expected, the demon took a step back, letting his eyes wander up and down on the human he had in front of him, almost in an attempt to check if it was really them. He too, couldn't stop his mouth from hanging open at the sight.

The two of them just stood there for a few seconds, taken by so many emotions at once that they weren't sure what to do. But right as Mammon took a step forward, his mouth opening some more to let out words that he so desperately had wanted to say for so long now, MC's face contorted into one of pure sadness before they rushed towards him. Mammon greedily welcomed them into his arms as they jumped and wrapped their arms around his shoulders, and their legs around his waist. They buried their face into his neck, the warmth of their tears mixing with the rain on his skin.

His embrace only tightened even more as they mumbled his name amidst broken sobs, the sound ever so close to his ear that even though he had his eyes firmly closed, he might have cried on the spot too. But he had found them. He had them in his arms again. After what had seemed like a million years, finally, they were back where they belonged, and he was back with his human.

Almost as if they were about to be pulled away from him, Mammon placed a hand on the back of their head, wanting to protect their entire being from harm no matter the cost. He still wasn't sure why it had taken so long for him to reunite with them despite the obstacles, but at the present moment, nothing else could matter.

The lord had finally found them, and he wasn't about to let anyone interfer between their happiness once more.

"I ain't letting you go." He whispered through gritted teeth, his head lowering into their shoulder. "Ever again."

[minigoblinnn]

Hello! Long Time No See

Hello everyone idk how many people will see this because I don’t have a lot of followers but that’s okay. HI! I haven’t used this account in almost three years I think. I’m pretty sure the last time I used this was possibly my freshman year of high school and I am now going to be a senior in September. So the world has kind of gone to shit recently but I had some soul searching while stuck in my house for over 3 months and realized that I needed to try to find what makes me happy. So bc we have all the time in the world rn bc 1. quarantine and 2. school is over, I thought I would try to revisit things that I used to love from freshman year and before. Yes I am 17 and I am no longer a hardcore stan like I was in middle school but it’s been a little refreshing trying to find myself again. If you’ve made it this far on this post thank you so much! This is more of a revamp of myself bc I realized over quarantine that I haven’t been truly happy in almost 3 years so whoops. 

Anyways this is gonna be sort of like a long rant but if you end up reading to the end I really appreciate it I hope I don’t bore you!

1. A major thing I had to come to terms with during quarantine was that I am indeed depressed. For the past 3 years I have been shoving down my inner struggles really deep within myself and never officially addressed it. As I’m sure many others who struggle with mental health have had to deal with the same difficulties of being stuck at home, it was a very shitty experience that I had to endure. I think a lot that attributed to it was the pressure of school and the rapid change of being in school one day to having a complete flip was also a major adjustment. As someone who has major control issues and hates very big change all at once this was very overwhelming for me as I’m sure it was for many of you. With this, I also realized I never prioritized myself before quarantine. I never talked about my struggles with friends and I was very irritable around late April/early May when it came to a specific friend. I previously had a major breakdown in school bc I was super anxious over losing this friendship back in February so that was also affecting my mental health extremely. Since my birthday in May, I have since slowly learned to prioritize myself and to face my struggles instead of avoiding the problem like I usually do. I now have a therapist that I talk to weekly over the phone and also with school ending it has released a lot of pressure that I had on me before. I still haven’t really discussed it all yet but I am the type that doesn’t like talking about me in that way or discussing myself in a vulnerable way but I hope I will slowly learn to improve on that. School wise, let’s just say the 4th marking period was an extremely ugly one. My sleep is something that is on and off. I am constantly exhausted but I cannot sleep so I’m trying different methods to try to fix my sleep but that is a uphill battle. I am currently writing this at 4:39 am so if that gives you any indication there you go.

2. Since there hasn’t been anything else to do and I don’t have my license yet, I have been getting back into things I used to enjoy freshman year and prior as I stated above. On my journey of trying to find any ounce of happiness again, I have been re-watching and revisiting things I used to “fangirl” over such as tv shows, youtubers, etc. 

Shows I have re-visitied include: The Vampire Diaries, Teen Wolf, Reign, Avatar: The Last Airbender, I finally watched Shadowhunters all the way through and not just the first season

Youtubers: Maddi Bragg (she recently rejoined youtube so...), I also have re-watched Dan and Phil Games, specifically the sims series bc I used to love it. 

And bc I re-watched Shadowhunters I re-watched the Mortal Instruments: City Of Bones movie that is on Netflix and before I get bashed I used to love that movie bc I personally think it is more of what I envisioned of what the books come to life would look like minus the ending...I also really like Jamie Campbell Bower and Lily Collins so personal bias but Malec on the tv show are immaculate. Controversial topic I know. And just earlier last night ig I finished reading City of Bones and I’m gonna re-read the entire TMI series and re-read/finish TID series. 

3. Along with revisiting things I have sort of slowly reinvented myself ig. I cut my hair right after my birthday so before it was about right past my chest and I cut it to roughly above my shoulders and I re-dyed my hair black bc I cannot be a ginger. My music taste has also slightly put more alt music and indie groups. Everyday I find new bands such as Meet me @ the altar, 100 gecs, and I recently got into $uicideBoy$...but honestly I get good music recommendations from tiktok so ofc. Also with the current climate in the US I have been a lot more outspoken when it comes to politics and my activism. I have a pretty conservative republican father who listens to fox news for however long I can remember. And after the 2016 election, I never really tried to argue/debate my father about Trump and everything but I also was not super informed in politics. But now I am absolutely never silence. I have gotten in plenty of arguments mostly with my mother about my activism. I have also gotten into painting political statement paintings after I painted my BLM protests signs. I have put these paintings around my room but my mom does not like them but I don’t care. So I am definitely wayyyyy more vocal when it comes to social issues and politics and I am not afraid to back down. I think before I didn’t speak up bc I didn’t want to argue with my father bc he would shut me down immediately when I tried to say anything against trump. But now I don’t care. Bc everything he stands for goes against me and my existence so I will not be silent as much as my parents want to. They don’t understand that I have always had these opinions, I just never expressed them as much until now bc I didn’t know how to properly express it. That I am super proud of.

4. Another thing I sort of realized ig was that I can now fully say I am definitely pansexual. Bro even typing that is like wow. Okay okay back story. So freshman year I told my two best friends at the time that I believed I was pan bc I’ve always thought that but I was never comfortable enough to say I was apart of the lgbtq+ community bc idk I just don’t feel like I have a right to? Bc after freshman year I slowly moved to other best friends and with them and my family I have always referenced to only being interested in men and ig I instilled this norm that I could only talk about liking men in front of them and my friends so I never felt comfortable addressing it. I still always had that thought in my head and especially in recent months I have been turned off from guys in general besides maybe 4, all who are actors or Kurtis Conner lowkey. So I’m not really looking to date anytime soon so it doesn’t really matter but I just don’t see me dating a guy. I think about it for about 2 seconds and then I snap back to reality. But yeah I made a pan flag painting and put it in my room and my parents have no idea what it is so they won’t even question me. But I don’t feel comfortable addressing it to my friends or my family, oh definitely not. I’ve put it on my second tiktok account but I don’t let my best friends ig see it so yeah i will probably never tell them until college. I’m sure most of them won’t care but again, I never really addressed personal things about myself with them unless it’s like my depression where I couldn’t hide it anymore but anyways that’s just how I am.

So things I’ve learned since being stuck at home for 3 months: I’m depressed, I’m pan, I’m a leftist/left-leaning, and I will no longer just say I will beat someone up but I will actually do it not that I haven’t already but that’s not important. But anyways, idk how often I will use this but this is an update. I might delete some old posts based on me now and everything but yeah I will hopefully use this to update on the things I revisit! Hope everyone is doing mostly well! If you read all of this thank you thank you thank you! Sending virtual hugs and kisses!

sorry for any errors, I recently put on these long acrylics and I’m using my laptop and I haven’t had long nails in a while so bear with me :)