#sorry I just read THE WROST TAKE somewhere and had to get this out

[kunaigirl]

Why are we just supposed to be….over COVID??? Thousands upon thousands upon THOUSANDS people were dying by the bus load EVERY. SINGLE. DAY. For well over a year straight. People lost people they cared about. People lost their jobs. Nobody was safe. We were all under lockdown for a year and even longer than that for some. People couldn’t visit loved ones. Friends couldn’t attend friend’s funerals because they were always mandatorily set to close blood family only. Everything was closed down. City and state boarders were closed. Biohazard notices were taped to windows everywhere. National emergency notices were broadcast every few hours.

And then when vaccines were finally available OVER AN ENTIRE YEAR later we all had to get them in hazard/emergency distribution tents that were set up on college campuses and in parking lots. I was sitting in a room full of masked strangers for the first time in over a year in what used to be the college library that had been transformed into a vaccine distribution center after having to be screened and seen in a parking lot tent first. We all did. And we were all sobbing. Total strangers, completely afraid. Total strangers sharing our unspoken universal mourning, crying softly behind our masks.

Why the FUCK are we just supposed to be over it??? ON WHAT FUCKIGN PLANET CAN WE JUST BE OVER THAT???? Not even to mention IT’S STILL FUCKING HERE BY THE WAY.

I’m so tired.

We’re all so tired.

Don’t let people shit on our shared trauma.

[martinsblackwood]

Hey baby, I think I wanna marry you.

Inspired by my own prompt: “This place has the best Oreo cake and I have heard that if you propose to someone in here they’ll give you two free pieces so, please, pretend to be my boyfriend and let’s do a fake propose; it’s for a good cause!”

Warning: English is not my native language, and, honestly, I’m a bad writer who hasn’t finished writing a fanfiction for ages so don’t expect much. If you read this and end up thinking it’s the wrost fanfiction you have ever read, please, just pretend I never wrote it, okay? Ily. ❤

"Oh, yesterday at the café near here there was a marriage propose. I mean, who the hell propose to someone else in a café? The house offered them the Oreo cake that Simon never shut up about, though." Nick starts yet another conversation.

Simon is at Nick’s garage with his usually group of friends and all they’re doing is talking about random things.

"Really?" Says Simon, followed immediatly to an "Oh! What are you waiting for? Give your number to Cal Price, he has a crush on you since high school, I'm sure he wouldn't mind jumping being boyfriends and become your fiancé right away" from Abby.

Simon rolls his eyes while everyone start to laugh, everyone except Bram, who after Simon keeps watching changes his weird expression in a little smile, or at least this is what Simon thinks he is trying to do with his face.

"What about Bram?" Everyone turns their attention to Garrett, "he loves the Oreo cake, too, and I don't think he would mind getting a free piece."

"I don't l-" Garrett interrupts whatever Bram was trying to say by elbowing his side.

"I-uhm... O-okay." Simon freezes at that. Okay, he often jokes that he would anything for Oreos, and the joke is that he is actually not joking at all, but the cute and shy Bram Greenfeld willing to fake a marriage propose with him for a piece of the most delicious Oreo cake seems strange even to him.

"Are you sure?" He asks. "Yes", Bram replies. And, well, for how ridiculous faking a propose may sound, Simon isn't going to take a step back.

Because what's better than a piece of Oreo cake? A free piece of Oreo cake, of course.

[The Next Day ☀]                                              

"Shit, we didn't think about the ring." Simon realizes while he and Bram where walking towards the Cakes & Ann café shop.

"Oh, uhm... since you're proposing to m-me in a café, I think it makes sense if it's something that y-you really hadn't planned." Bram says, and Simon's sight may not be the best, I mean, he wears eyeglasses for a reason, but he swears that Bram's cheeks are tintend a bit of red now.

"Yeah, you're right", he replies. They walk for a few minutes more, and when they reach their destination, they both stops a few steps from the entrance.

"Are you ready?" Simon asks, looking at Bram. "Y-yes" Bram replies, and he gives him a small and nervous smile. There's something mischevious in his eyes, too, and Simon isn't sure if he ever saw that look on him before.

"Let's do it", Simon says and then proceeds to open the door for both of them.

Bram orders a cappuccino with a bit of chocolate powder on top, while Simon orders, of course, their Oreo milkshake.

They stay at the table for a bit sipping their drinks. Simon is a bit nervous, he doesn’t knows if he can do it, sure, he was a drama kid in high school, but he usually had a few lines, or none at all, and he never had to propose to the freaking adorable Bram Greenfeld.

He catches Bram's gaze and takes a deep breath. He suddenly get up from his seat, and goes to Bram's side. Bram turns his body a little towards Simon, and his mouth is a bit open. He actually looks surprised.

Simon kneels and takes Bram's hand with both of his hands. He looks at their hands for a bit, his heart start to beating faster, and he suddenly thinks that he wouldn't mind holding Bram's hand for hours.

He can feel Bram looking at him, he can feel everyone in this shop looking at him.

He raises his gaze to look at Bram and takes another deep breath.

"Bram, I know that this is so suddenly. I didn't really meant to do it that soon, but I have been thinking a lot about us lately. When I say that you're the best boyfriend I could ever ask for, I mean it. And when I joke about us growing old together, I'm not really joking. I don't have a freaking clue of how you're going to react and if you want this at all. But I really do, and I want to try: Do you want to marry me?"

Simon can hear a gasp of surprise escaping someone's lips somewhere in the shop.

Bram’s mouth is hanging more open now, and Simon swears that he can see that some tears have formed in his eyes.

Apparently the cute Bram Greenfeld can also act, and he can act very good because nothing about his reaction screams 'fake' to Simon. Is there something that this boy can't freaking do?

He feels Bram's squeezing gently some of his fingers. Then, he shakes his head a bit and smiles. This time, though, his expression isn't very convincing. There is something off about the smile that can usually light an entire room, this time, Simon thinks, he can't find any light on it.

"Y-yes. O-of course." Bram replies, he gives Simon a little smile, and Simon smiles back at him.

Suddenly, the few people in the café start to cheering at the fake engaged couple, and Simon's smile is a bit wider now, and he is starting to feel overwhelmed and without thinking twice, he hugs Bram.

He can feel Bram's body stiffen and just when he is starting to panicking about it, Bram hugs him back, starting to relax.

They hold each others for a few moments, and Simon wishes that he and Bram where closer because hugging him may be one of the best things he has ever done.

When they're pulling back from the hug, someone screams to 'kiss' at them, and Bram and Simon both freezes at that. Simon knows that he should say no, but Bram's lips are a few centimeters away from his, and he is all flushed and even more beautiful up close, Simon is starting to feel overwhelmed once again, and without really thinking about it he whisper to Bram: "Can I kiss you?"

"Yes." Bram whisper back, and so Simon does it. He catch Bram's lips with his own, and with his hand he takes hold of Bram's curly hair to tilt his head a little for a better angle, Bram is cupping his face, and now they are actually kissing.

It's slow and all Simon can see, feel and think about is Bram, Bram, Bram. They continue to kiss until they have to gasp for air, and if hugging Bram was one of the best thing he has ever done, kissing him was the best thing he has ever done.

In the end, they get their free pieces of Oreo cake.

Simon isn't really happy about it, though. Bram has been ignoring him since the kiss, he keeps looking at everything and everyone but him, and Simon feels like he has ruined whatever relationship they had before. He shouldn't have agreed to that freaking ridiculous plan, and even if he got to kiss Bram, he is probaby going to ignore him from now and on.

Simon mentally slaps himself all the time while he eats his piece of Oreo cake.

When they leave the shop, they decide to do it while holding each others hands.

Just after they’re out of sight, Bram quickly lets go of his hand as if it were somehow burning him. Simon's heart breaks a little at that.

"Wow, was I such a bad kisser?" He tries to joke, really, but his voice comes off wounded and Simon cringes a bit at that. He looks at Bram and stiffen.

Bram has the weird expression that he had yesterday, but this time he isn't that good at masking it, this time Simon can clearly see that he is hurt, and he looks lost, too.

Simon wishes that he could make it go away, that he could hold him and kiss him over and over again, but Bram isn't interested in him like that and now his heart is breaking a little more.

"Sorry, I was just jok-" "I liked kissing you." Simon freezers and Bram does, too.

He watches Bram's eyes growing bigger and his mouth is hanging a bit open like he is only now realizing what he has just said.

Bram's expression changes, he takes a deep breath and then he continues: "I-I wanted to try it for quite some time, actually."

Simon's heart start to beating faster, and the butterflies in his stomach are going crazy. Bram is trying to say sorry, but Simon can't really listen to him. His heartbeat is too loud in his ears, and Simon is trying to say something, too, but he seems to have lost the ability to speak so he does the only thing that he is capable to do now: He goes quickly to Bram, cups his face and then smash his lips with his own.

The kiss is passionate this time, and now Bram's taste is mixed with the Oreo cake, his hands are around Simon's waist, and he is pulling him closer, everything is just so perfect this time and Simon wishes that he could kiss Bram for eternity without stopping.

While kissing Bram for the second time, Simon comes to the conclusion that he kisses just like Elliott Smith sings.

The next time at Nick's, Simon and Bram decide to arrive together and they're holding hands when Abby opens the front door for them.

"Ooh." She says surprised, watching their hands for just a moment. Then, she gives them a big smile, and quickly turns to Leah. "Hey, Leah, I think they could take the title of being the cutest couple in town away from us.”

"Hey!" Nick suddenly interrupts. "There's no question here; me and Garrett are obviously the cutest couple!" Everyone laughs at that.

Note: Nick/Garrett may seems a joke, but they’re actually a thing. No straights were allowed in this fanfic. 

I hope you somehow enjoyed reading this mess. ❤