#sometimes in her impulse she forgets she cant touch his face

[pokemon-ash-aus]

Hey, Jay, do you have any human pals? Or, well, maybe not pals, but people you’re somewhat OK with? If not, fair, I’m just curious.

Jay: Mon is pretty cool, she forgets a lot that she can’t touch my face, but i dont blame her- she knew me before… before my face I guess

[stardustprompts]

the dragon republic - r.f kuang   sentence starters change tenses/pronouns as needed !!  some lines have been edited for clarity / length / ease of roleplaying tw :   drugs , suicide mention , illness , addiction , death , murder , nsfw  , language

‘I’m telling you, you’re not in any state to be useful.’

‘get out of bed and stop being such a brat.

‘you will learn to control yourself, and you will start protecting them.’

‘you think you’re on the brink of madness, you think that this moment is going to be when you finally snap, but it’s not.’

‘eventually you learn to exist on the precipice of insanity.’

‘it should have been you. you should have died.’

‘revolution is fine in theory. but nobody wants to die.’

‘you can stop pretending to be my friend, because I know that’s all you came for.’

‘you’re dead. I saw you die.’

‘all you want is to get your revenge. but you could be so much more. do so much more. you could change history.’

‘can’t I be happy? I’ve missed you.’

‘of course you’re in on this madness. what did I expect?’

‘you’re frightened all the time. you think everyone’s out to get you, and you want them to be out to get you because then that’ll give you an excuse to hurt them.’

‘fuck your pain.’

‘you asked how large my sorrow is, and I answered, like a river in spring flowing east.’

‘if you just keep breathing, I’ll tell you a story.’

‘you spend your whole life chasing after some illusion you think is real, only to realize you’re a damned fool, and that if you reach any further, you’ll drown.’

‘you don’t have to suffer alone, you know.’

‘you’re so strong. whatever you’re seeing, whatever you’re feeling, it’s not as strong as you are.’

‘she thinks it’s funny to watch her prey squirm before she kills it.’

‘she knows what drives men, and she takes their deepest desire and makes them believe that she is the only thing that can give it to them.’

‘I don’t need your fake sympathy.’

‘I know nothing. I help no one. let’s leave it at that, shall we?’

‘you are my greatest weapon. do not disappoint.’

‘you’ve been feeling the pull, haven’t you? it’s consuming you. your mind is not your own.’

‘does it ever bother you? that you are only a pale imitation of ____?’

‘are you insane? you want to live, you fucking hide.’

‘I know you’ll fight her to the end. but I hope you realize you’re going to go mad trying.’

‘I would never lie to you.’

‘I mean, sometimes I think maybe I can stop, maybe I can just run away. but what I’ve seen—-what I’ve done—- I can’t come back from that.’

‘when you have the power that you do, your life is not your own.’

‘people will seek to use you or destroy you.’

‘you can’t do it alone. I’m all you got. you have to trust me.’

‘you don’t know how to fix me, do you? you never did.’

‘good men are dead because of you. I hope you know.’

‘I saw how you were hurting. that looked like torture. I thought you might be relieved.’

‘you’re always talking about ____ like he was some great hero. but he wasn’t.’

‘I’d die before I let anyone hurt you’

‘you can’t keep me safe, so you might as well let me fight.’

‘I like you better. aren’t you flattered?’

‘how does it feel getting a taste of your own medicine?’

‘it’s like I’m frozen in one moment. and no one knows it because everyone else moved on except me.’

‘I can’t figure out who’s right or wrong, and I’m the smart one, I’m always supposed to have the right answer, but I don’t.’

‘I just wanted it to be over. I wasn’t thinking. I didn’t want to hurt them, not really, I just wanted it to end.’

‘I suppose it’s not easy going to war against friends.’

‘___ made her choice. she just happened to be dead fucking wrong.’

‘he’s still grieving. and there’s nothing you can do to make that hurt less.’

‘you know what your problem is? you have no impulse control. absolutely zero. none.’

‘you have to fight for something, you can’t just—just live your life like a fucking coward.’

‘it’s not about who you are, it’s about how they see you. and once you’re mud in this country, you’re always mud.’

‘I stuck with you because we thought we’d stay together. we’re always supposed to be together.’

‘it sounds like you’re saying that people have to die for progress.’

‘war’s different when you’re not struggling for survival.’

‘your secret is safe from ___, if that what you’re asking. but I don’t understand why you’re lying to me.’

‘I’m not stupid. I know what I saw.’

‘don’t sentence us to death just because you’ve been humiliated.’

‘she’s telling the truth. you’re just not listening because you’re terrified that someone else is right.’

‘cant give orders for shit, but you love taking them.’

‘I realized that he’d gone crazy and that something had broken and that that path was just going to lead to his death.’

‘did you think he’d fall in love with you if you just did what he asked?’

‘don’t lie to me. I know what you’ve done.’

‘we  /  I don’t need your permission to exist.’

‘you’re little children, grasping in a void that you don’t understand for toys that don’t belong to you.’

‘he dared to threaten us  /  me. he deserved what he got.’

‘would a simple thank-you suffice? or did you also want a hug?’

‘you think it makes you strong, but it’s going to destroy you.’

‘I didn’t think it was worth scaring you when I couldn’t do anything about it.’

‘you weren’t going to tell me I was going mad!’

‘she promises you peace when you know you ought to be fighting a war. that’s worse.’

‘no one has to die. you can have everything back. everyone. no one has to go.’

‘he only has as much power as you give him.’

‘you can tell me everything I hate about myself, but I already know. you can’t say anything to hurt me more.’

‘I loved an idea of you. I was infatuated with you. I wanted to be you.’

‘I loved you too. do you believe that?’

‘it’s alright to cry. I know what you saw.’

‘our dead don’t leave us. they’ll haunt you as long as you let them.’

‘that boy is a disease on your mind. forget him.’

‘he was brilliant. he was different. you’d have never met anyone like him.’

‘this is why we are polite to our allies.’

‘we’re soldiers. we’re always about to die.’

‘I want it more than anything. but I can’t ask you to do this for me.’

‘you are going to kill him. and then nothing will save you.’

‘if you love him, then you can trust yourself to protect him.’

‘you have the same eyes. angry. desperate. you’ve seen too much. you hate too much.’

‘all we have is this story unfolding, and in the script of this world, nothing’s going to bring ___ back to life.’

‘I can’t look at you and not see him.’

‘we’re fighting for something good. something worth fighting for.’

‘I have to do this. otherwise I have nothing.’

‘i’m going to tell you a story. I want you to just listen. and I want you to believe me. please.’

‘I don’t think I can die. i’ve tried.’

‘when you have this much power and this much is at stake you don’t fucking run from it.’

‘I’m scared for you. for both of us. I can’t help that.’

‘if you stay here you’ll die for nothing.’

‘you’re my sister. how could I not remember you?’

‘holy shit. you’re going to die. we’re all going to die.’

‘you never think, do you? you always just pick whatever fights you want, whenever you want, and fuck the consequences—-’

‘if you die, I die.’

‘we’ll keep surviving until we’re safe and the world can’t touch us. one enemy at a time, agreed?’

‘you don’t know anything going into a battle. you only know the stakes.’

‘I had a dream. you died.’

‘I just want to make things right between us. what’s that going to take?’

‘I really am sorry. please, I don’t want us to end like this.’

‘please—- you have more enemies than you think you do—-’

‘you taught me the meaning of fear. nothing more.’

‘I know what kind of person you are— you betray those who help you and you throw lives away like they’re nothing.’

‘we are precisely the same, you and I.’

‘we’ve acquired more power than any mortal should have the right to, which means we have to make the decisions no one else can.’

‘the world is our chessboard. it’s not our fault if the pieces get broken.’

‘would you really do things differently, if you had another chance?’

‘tell me you wouldn’t have given up everything. tell me you wouldn’t sacrifice everything and everyone you knew for the power to take back your country.’

‘you don’t understand the stakes, because you don’t know the meaning of true fear. you don’t know how much worse it could have been.’

‘I’m sorry I hurt you. but I had a plan to protect my people, and you simply got in the way.’

‘____ discards allies without blinking when they are no longer convenient, and if you don’t believe me when I say you’re next, then you’re a fool.’

‘you need me far more than you need them.’

‘you think that he’s invincible, but he is more fragile than you think.’

‘I know that he’d throw himself off a cliff for you. please stop trying to break him.’

‘a puppet to the end. when are you going to learn?���

‘I know what you told him. now I want you to tell me the truth.’

‘have you ever considered being less of a pretentious fuck?’

‘do you have any idea how much trouble you are?’

‘do you want someone to rearrange your face? because I’ll do it for free.’

‘I just don’t want the world to break you.’

‘don’t you dare puke on me.’

‘if you’re trying to drown me, then you’re being a little obvious about it.’

‘why do you always think someone’s trying to kill you?’

‘I feared you, I hated you, and that never really went away.’

‘you can’t beat that thing. you have no idea what you’re up against.’

‘this is what happens when men are fool enough to toy with heaven.’

‘chaos is clever. it can disguise itself as rational and benevolent. it can make us merciful. but in the end, it must always be hunted down and destroyed.’

‘if you’re going to kill us all then you’ll have to kill him, too.’

‘he’s not the one we’re trying to save.’

‘you’ll be alright. it’s not as bad as you think it is.’

‘I’m supposed to be a soldier! what the fuck am I supposed to do now?’

[harley-michaels-main]

Hi! Can I please have a Haikyuu matchup? It is absolutely fine if you cant!

MBTI: ENFP

Hogwarts house: Hufflepuff

Random fact: I’m associated with the color pink a lot and I’m bi 🏳️‍🌈 she/her prounouns

Looks: 4’11 female, pear body type, brown skin, dark brown eyes, dark brown short hair, long lashes, eye bags, thunder thighs, Big pouty lips (the one thing I actually like about my face) and a few freckles. I also have reading glasses

Personality: I’m very shy and reserved at first, you will definitely have to make the first move cause I refuse. But once you get to know me it’s a 180, I go on long rants about literally anything and everything, (if I have a shit day I recommend ear plugs) Im dramatic, loud, energetic, super Sarcastic, Honest, funny, childish, forgetful, and pretty go with the flow! I’m a pretty rational And logical person I think about pros and cons and probability and am usually aware of what is going on around me. I will try to break down what the problem is and find a way to solve it. I can adapt pretty well in social situations I know what to put out for certain groups and can just adapt to situations generally. Then there is the other part of me that is completely impulse and emotional even tho rational wins most times if I’m stressed good luck with getting me to make good decisions. I like playing around but have hard lines with boundaries when it comes to physical touch at first. I have anxiety real bad and I’m worried that my friends actually hate me and have a hard time being myself. I love making people laugh I think I’m pretty smart but I have no common sense. I’ll tell you random facts I just learned for the hell of it. If I was to describe myself in another way I’d say burnt out gifted kid who just said F it. I’m sneaky. I thrive off praise and people cheering me on especially at sports events and will work harder for criticism. Im a “I’ll do anything for 5 dollars” kinda person. Im low key kinda a know it all and a smart ass I always have something to say and I am not one to sugar coat. I’m a huge foodie! My love language is physical touch and giving gifts, especially food! I’m pretty caring if your sad I’ll bake for you and try to emotionally comfort you as much as possible and friends have told me I give good advice, I’m very protective of all my friends and family, Im pretty creative I laugh at pretty much anything.

Cons: i accidentally overshare, I get frustrated really easy.I am prone to procrastinating and giving up sometimes even if Ik the deadline is tomorrow, its hard to get motivated to do anything without someone being on my ass about it but once I start I can continue without much pushing as long as I don’t have too many distractions. I’m emotional I’ll cry without realizing it, I’m very stubborn. Behind closed doors I’m very clingy.

Likes: working out, reading, sleeping, going out to party’s with friends ( yea ik a girl with social anxiety loves partying and people I’m just as confused), milkshakes, fashion, world building, drawing, animated movies, STUFFED ANIMALS!!! I love cuddles, sports (cross country, volleyball, and wrestling) writing story’s, blankets, cheesy romance novels, I love cooking and eating new food from new places! Shopping, fantasy stuff.

Dislikes: being dirty. I can get sweaty, muddy, messy but if I don’t have a shower there will be hell to pay, I don’t like eating or drinking after people, felt fabric, dolls, The cold in general, sad movies, coffee, being sick, being picked at for my height.

Random fact: I’m the shortest girl on all my sports teams, I played all around for my volleyball team and then got moved to right back and server.

Hi Darling. I hope you're doing good and I have to say, I wish you would love more than just your lips because you sound like a beautiful girl and I'm sure anyone would find you gorgeous and if they don't, then they must be blind.

Your Haikyuu Match Up is...

Sugawara Koshi

Y'all are the type of couple that people thought you were going out before you actually started going out.

You two simply compliment each other so well that it's hard not to think so. Honestly, there was no drastic change when you two started dating.

In the words of Grey's Anatomy, he is your person. You person that you can tell anything to and the person you go to when you have trouble. He is the person that you trust with your life.

Koshi is always the one who will be at your side in times of happiness and sorrow. He will wake up in the morning and his first words will be telling you how beautiful you are.

He knows the feeling of self-doubt and he understands it well which is why he constantly will be there to help you.

However, he will need the help as well. He may try to hide it, but he isn't the best liar in the world.

For those times when you are dared to do something dangerous, he will pull you away before you attempt to make a fool of yourself because let's be honest, we all make fools of ourselves.

Koshi will always be there to lend an ear when you feel the need to rant. He loves to listen to you talk and if you want his advice he is more than willing to give it to you.

Koshi's love language is words of affirmation so it feels nice to him whenever you talk to him about your troubles. It makes him feel more validated in a way.

Don't fret though because he will always be there to tell you how much you mean to him and how much you help him even if you don't think you do.

He also loves to get you small memorabilia for every date. Anything from a quick photo to some jewelry, he likes to know that you have something to look at and remember these moments buy.

However, Koshi isn't perfect and does have his flaws. He tends to push you away when he has his rougher days. He says it's because he doesn't want to burden you when in reality he is too scared to show you that he is afraid of a lot of things.

It definitely takes time, but he has gotten better at opening up to you and realizing that he isn't a second choice to you.

Altogether, he is someone who will be your person as you will be to him.

Alternate Choices

Osamu Miya

Keiji Akaashi

Daichi Sawamura

[ayellowcurtain]

Can you write more about alpha Sander and him being friends with Senne? 

please write more of the abo au, im obsessed with the whole robbe/sander/britt. Like maybe a moment where robbe feels pushed over the edge? like he cant take anymore that sander doesnt choose him alone?

you could add Sander ending Britt and she for revenge looks for Sander again making Robbe see them making them separate, but then reconsider and come back.

Part 3 or 4, idk

Sander is not a good person. He cares deeply for Robbe, maybe he was impulsive when he bit him, but he doesn’t regret it for one second, Robbe is and will always be the one. The thing is: Sander sometimes likes to make dumb, dumb decisions based on nothing but his instant needs.

He needs to settle down already or to take it easy, but then he’s at a party, and Britt is constantly all over him, waiting for him to do something about it and they’ve been drinking together for a few hours, talking and flirting. And Sander is really not trying, but it’s just natural. Before he can think he’s already falling for the flirting game that Britt taught him to be a master in.

Like always, they end up stumbling their way to the second floor of Senne’s place, Sander touching the wall behind Britt until he finds an unlocked door that he opens and pushes her inside, locking the door behind him, quickly getting rid of his clothes with her help.

-

Robbe is not answering his texts or calls. Sander tries not to worry, but with every minute without an answer, he starts to get even more anxious. Why is it always like this with them?

Things with Britt were different last time. His body is still sore from all the scratching and for how long they went, so many rounds Sander lost count. Sander knows her well and she was very vocal about what she wanted, but that he can’t give her.

Sander doesn’t plan on being a dad any time soon. And when he said it was just goodbye sex, she was pissed. Britt is also really bad at hiding her emotions and Sander knew a thunderstorm was coming his way when he didn’t do as she wanted, but he was determined to stay as far away as possible from Britt from now on. For his sake and for Robbe’s, but it was too late.

Robbe knows about what happened, Sander feels it like it’s his own emotions. This is the worst part about being connected to Robbe: he knows the pain he not so accidentally caused.

He wasn’t planning on telling Robbe, even if it’s hard these days to keep any type of secret between them. Even though they’re in love, Sander doesn’t feel like he needs to tell his every action. Robbe knows how he is, this shouldn’t be a surprise. They’re young and have their entire lives to be together, Robbe is living his life too.

Please, Robbe, just pick up your fucking phone. Please?

Sander sighs, hanging up without being able to reach Robbe again. He almost goes to Britt’s place, asking nicely for her to stay away from Robbe, but there’s no point in that. The damage is already done. Sander knows she went to Robbe to try and ruin what they have.

-

Robbe is at his place, Sander can smell him, almost sure he’s right behind the door, choosing not to open it, but Sander needs to talk to him, so he knocks again, inhaling sharply, not totally comfortable in forcing Robbe to do things he doesn’t want to, but he won’t go home before they talk.

“Robbe, open the door.” He takes his hands off the door when he hears Robbe unlocking it, opening against his will, just because Sander said he had to.

“What are you doing here?”

Sander feels all his insides writhe as he sees Robbe after a few days. His eyes are red and swollen from crying, talking with a choked voice. “Robbe, you know that’s what she wants, that’s why she came here to tell you everything. You’re giving her exactly what she wants!”

“You? Yeah, she can have it. I’m not willing to waste my life for your love.” Robbe tries to walk away, but Sander holds his hand, keeping him close.

“You know you don’t mean that. I’m yours and you’re mine.” Sander puts his other hand on Robbe’s chest, where he feels the scar he left months and months ago. Not as a threat, but as a reminder that nobody else has this, they’re different.

“Why are you still fucking her then?” Sander sighs loudly, stepping back, still holding Robbe by his fingertips.

“Because! Robbe, we’re so fucking young. Do you really want to spend 50, 60 years just with me? Not knowing anyone else? Not living your youth because you’re stuck with me? You’re even younger, needs to live your life, we’re gonna be together in the end, no matter what.”

Robbe snorts, stepping back, shaking his head. “This is so much bullshit! What kind of thought is that? I don’t want just the end, I want all of it.”

Sander tries to think about what to say, but he just stutters, trying to understand what kind of feeling Robbe brings out of him. He’s never seen Robbe like this, so serious and hurt, and because of him. He never felt like this before, Sander doesn’t even know what this is.

Robbe looks down and Sander’s anxiety starts to get the best of him, making his ears ring. “Is it true that you breeded her?”

“What? No! Of course not!” Robbe is instantly relieved, but not at all happy yet and Sander just wants them to be ok. “We had sex, Robbe, that was it. I used a condom, I’m not that dumb.”

Robbe quietly pulls his hand away, walking to his kitchen in silence.

They’ve been playing this game of push and pull for too long, over a year and they went through some crazy times. Sander’s life changed a lot because of Robbe and their relationship. Anyone before and after Robbe was just fun, just a way to put his energy out, Senne went from a threat to his closest friend, knowing too much about Sander’s feelings for Robbe because, apparently, their smells are constantly mixed nowadays.

Only when he gets to the kitchen that he smells the pasta that Robbe was making, putting spices and cheese inside the pan, stirring a little too quickly. Sander walks carefully to him, resting his forehead against the back of Robbe’s head, pressing his nose against the nape of his neck.

“I’m sorry again. Always.” He whispers, trying to calm his breaths, closing his eyes and just enjoying being this close to Robbe, smelling his every emotion, even the bad ones. Sander will gladly accept all of them.

“I’m tired of your excuses.”

“I know.” Sander thinks that he can’t risk this, to hurt Robbe so much he gives up eventually. “Do you want me to stop? I won’t kiss anyone else, have sex with anyone else but you.”

Robbe stops stirring his pasta, looking over his shoulder after a second. Sander knows he’s offering a promise that’s hard for him to keep, but he’s more than willing to try if that makes Robbe happy.

“Would you?” He raises his eyebrows, turning his body slowly to face Sander, making him step back, already rethinking his words. “Not even flirting with people?”

Sander huffs a laughter, looking into Robbe’s eyes. “If that’s what you want, yes.”

Robbe’s excitement fades away a little bit and he sighs, shaking his head. “It’s not me who needs to want this, Sander.”

Sander steps back, not knowing what else to say or do to make Robbe believe him. “Fuck, Robbe…I know! Just give me something to work with.”

He thinks for a second, meeting Sander’s eyes again as he answers, “Yes. I want that.”

“So consider it done.” Robbe raises his eyebrows, his cheeks slowly turning a soft pink, his inside getting warmer, softer and Sander laughs, quietly coming closer again. Robbe and his feelings have just that much power over him. “Now, we can forget about the rest of the world and maybe eat something?”

[trailerparkflower]

Borderline personality disorder + Steve Harrington?...

So I was thinking about how Steve acts in relationships, researched dependency from the partner and then found a lot of info about BPD, wich made me think what many of the disorder symptoms are very fitting to Steve and explains some things in his behaviour. Lets starts, guys!

Promiscuity.

All his teen life Steve been slutting around probably too scared for serious relationships (because its better that way, no one will leave him if he leaves them first), all charming and needy and touch-starved, calming down his desire for attention and affection. 

Unstable relationships/idealization of the partner, lack of boundares.

Then he settled in the realationships with Nancy (who are brave and smart and oh, so stable), which turned out pretty much unhealthy from both of the sides, and Steve became so depended on his her to the point of breaking up his bounds with everyone else( including his probably childhood best friend Tommy) except her and planning all his life to revolve around Nancy.

Fear of abandoment, frantic efforts to avoid being alone.

He fears what Nancy will abandon him so much what he becomes even more clingy and needy, while she gains even more control in relationships and becomes a “top dog” (from Joe words). In ST1 we also see how insecure and  jealous Steve was to Jonathan, his dramatic reaction on John and Nacny hug, jumping in conclusions without any evidences. He even breaks Jonathan camera in the begining just out of his “insecurity” (again, based on Joe interview), fear what Nancy and Jonathan have better understanding of each other. In other words, he afraid what Nacny will leave him for someone else and he will stay alone again. Steve Harrington canonically has big abandoment issues, probably cased by neglecting parents.

Needing attention+validation

Idk if I even should comment it. We all know what King Steve persona was build for getting attention, admiration and validation from others, know how much time Steve spends on his looks and hair, how pleased he is when Tommy and Carol have all eyes on him. When he doesnt get compliments from Nancy, he pouts and praises himself on his own because he needs that.... “see, a ninja”; “make sure you wont forget this pretty face”, ect. You ask me, Steve has the biggest praise kink in all Hawkins.

Inability to regulate emotion, difficultes with anger controlling. Impulsivity.

Steve is one yelling bitch. He is a soft boy, but when he gets really upset and angry, he becomes mean and yelly and acts without thinking. He tears apart his own essay because Nancy couldnt help him with it, he pouts, storms of the rooms, screams at people. 

Getting upset easily + habit of blocking out intense painful emotions.

If you ask Steve how he doing, he probably will smile and say “peachy!”. Not because everything is really peachy, but because Steve prefers to ignore his own problems and things what makes him sad and pretend what everything is perfectly alright. He asks Nancy go to the movie and “pretend everything is normal for a few hours.”, says what his parents totally gave him hell for drinking beer but “who cares, screw them” and changes the theme. Tommy screams “run away, Stevie boy, like you always do!”, wich suggest us what Steve has a tendentions to avoid confrontations and stressful situations. He once again says Nancy go to the party and pretend to be normal teens in ST2 when she voices her concerns, and we see what ignoring problems and pretending is Steves constant coping mechanism for stress fear and sadness.

Distorted self-image.

Steves sense of self also seems to be instable and based on how people around him see him, like with Tommy he was a school bad boy, with Nancy he became a good guy, with Dustin he became a total soft dork as we see in ST3 trailer. He is unsure about his own goals, he doesnt knows who he is and who he wants to be, like wich job he prefers and what he likes to do in his life generally. Tending to base his own self on his relationships with other people, he gets complitely lost in the end of ST2 when Nancy is no longer with him.

Self-harm, self-desctuctive behaviour. Self damaging acts as drinking, drugs, vandalism.

Steve smokes, drinks, gets into the fights he cant win. Stands near Tommy when he writes about Nancy the slut and Jonathan the creep, runs away from cops. I would even say what his fight with Jonathan was quite maschostic, because Steve rilled him up and then barely protected himself and almost didnt resisted when Jonathan pushed him to the ground and started to punch non stop. Tbh for me it seemed like if Steve was so upset what he wanted some physical pain to blur his emotional one.

Dissociation, "zoning out"

Sometimes if you pay enough attention, you see Steve standing/sitting here with blank empty face. Usually it happens in stressful events, when he has some free time by himself. He also gets slow time to time, like hes habing hard time to concentrate. Cant be sure, but its does seems like zoning out. Im think there was even some parody video where people noticed what Steve sometimes gets blank faced and slow in the middle of the talk.

Paranoidal ideas, anixety, nervousness

Oh, this one is easy. You honestly wont find another ST character who is so full of anixety. He is fidgety, he hugs himself in a self-defense manner, he makes himself look smaller than he is, he constantly has the deer in the highlights look on his face, he cant think and act straight when he meets the Upside Down monster first time, so Jonathan even has to grab his hand and yank him to run. We also see how Steve is afraid of the goverment in the ST2, I would say its paranoidal behaviour-its seems like he does think what they are constantly being watched. Says what they will destroy their lives and families and changes the theme what Nancy wants to discuss.

In ST1 he is also ridiculously scared what his parents, dad especially, will find out what he drunk some beer, he gets so scared of this idea what he even calls Nancy and asks not to mention that to the cops, says what his parents will “Murder him”. 

In ST2 he is also pretty freaked out by Billy, in basketball scene when he is pushed down and Billy holds his hand you can see what Steve is trembling and looks like he is going to cry. Im not joking guys, just rewatch the scene....Poor guy just cant have a rest!

Presistent feelings of emptiness & guilt

“I'm sorry? What the hell am I sorry for?”

No matter is he guilty or not, if Steve having a conflict with someone, most of the times he will feel guilty and be sorry, as we see in the show. He wants to apologize to Jonathan for telling him means things, saying, “I just wanna be good, make things right”, buys him new camera (and giving it to Nancy, not presenting it to Jonathan himself.), cleans local theatre, he says sorry to Nancy, calls himself a jerk, a shitty boyfriend (wich is kinda downgrading himself), wanting to bring her roses and say how sorry he is again. Dustin also easily kind of guilt trips (”you promised to protect us”)  him to protect the party in the tonnels, while Steve clearly was against the whole thing, and feeling really unwell after getting his ass beaten by Billy.

Learning disability/scool problems. BPD can make it difficult for them to control the focus of their attention, to concentrate.

Steve plays it cool and pretends unbothered, but he actually tries hard to learn stuff. Even in ST1 we see in his room, what his table is covered by various homework papers. Its been shown what Steve having a hard time with study, what he is eager to be useful but not the smartest guy around, from his really chaotic essay and getting C-, to the Nazis comment. Its seems like he has some learning disability and doesnt even knows about it himself.

 Its also a known hinted fact what Steve doesnt have a good relationships with his parents, especially with strict father, he even calls him a “grade A asshole”. By their absence in the series, when we saw all the main character families, Steve remains all alone in big house, wich makes us think about how neglecting they are. The thing is, “people with BPD  have been found to be significantly more likely to having been abused by parents.”

During development, Joe Keery and the Duffers spoke about “what kind of family life [Steve] comes from and maybe this girl Nancy is quiet and listens in a way that other people haven't listened to him at this point.”-wich is pretty fitting to the portrayal of “neglecting, denying the validity of childnren thoughts and feelings parents”-that type of the bad parenting what BPD people mostly experenced.

“Parents were also reported to have failed to provide needed protection and to have neglected their child's physical care”, what gaves us the possible reason of Steves constant anixety and running away from the problems issues.

So, while we dont know can it be canon or not, I would say what there is high possibilities what Steve has BPD.

[diveronarpg]

Congratulations, SIDNEY! You’ve been accepted for the role of IMOGEN. Admin Rosey: First and foremost let me just say that Imogen has been one of my favorite characters in any play ever. She is the epitome of virtue and whenever I think of Lady Justice, I think of Imogen. I truly didn’t think that others would be as taken with them as I was, but Sidney, I’m so, so very happy that you’ve become as infatuated with them as I have. What got me was the tally that you kept running between their head and their heart. It’s something that encapsulates their struggle in both Shakespeare’s plays and in Isabella as well. You know how to ruin us, so ruin us well with Imogen why don’t you?  Please read over the checklist and send in your blog within 24 hours.

Out of Character

Alias | Sidney Age | 21 Preferred Pronouns | She/her Activity Level | I’m fairly active! I’m usually here when I’m not working or sleeping, and most likely mobile and available to plot. I get to replies within 1-3 days depending on muse and time management! On a numerical scale, I’d say I’m a 6-7/10. Timezone | EST Current/Past RP Accounts | My current DV account is here.

In Character

Character | Imogen / Isabella Gagliano (this would be my second character!)

Isabella ‘Izzy’ Beatriz Gagliano

ISABELLA - devoted to God; quite literal but not chosen for its meaning but because it was their grandmother’s name, something their father was adamant about his child bearing. To this day, they hate it on pure principle and prefer Izzy above all else. Bella, but only if you’re lucky.

BEATRIZ - happiness, bringer of joy; chosen by their mother especially for her baby girl, for her daughter’s face always brought out a smile in whoever held them. This is often the name they give out as their last and it is the name attached to all articles they’ve written for public consumption. They have identification to match as well; very few know their true surname and that’s the way they prefers it.

GAGLIANO - joyous, hard, brave; wholly not of their choosing and one they hated much throughout their youth as it followed them wherever they went, tragedy in tow. They shed it the moment they left Spain and never looked back. It belongs to their father and for all they care, he can fucking keep it.

What is a future plot idea you have in mind for the character?

ONE: COMEUPPANCE

Undeniably, Izzy has a lot of rage. Granted, it lies in wait deep beneath the surface, often clouded by their ever changing emotions and the vast spectrum of creativity that encompasses their mind on any given day, but it’s there if you know where to look. If you cut deep enough, there’s no telling what they’ll do to retaliate. What I’d love to explore is their hunger for justice. How far are they willing to go to expose the truth? They want nothing more than to lay Verona’s sins before the people’s feet, for all the world to see. And while they think they’re doing all these things for the greater good, I’d love to push them into a much more morally grey territory. They’ve already dabbled in anarchy when they watched as Nikolai set the Northern Grove aflame. But do they know Puck seriously injured someone? And are they okay with that as long as it means justice will be served? I’m a sucker for negative development and I think Izzy is the perfect person to nudge closer and closer to the edge of their own haphazardly constructed set of rules in hopes they breaks them. They’re bound and determined to punish someone, but I don’t think they realize you cannot pick and choose the lives lost in times of war. And their reckless wrath is guaranteed to take down an innocent person or two much sooner rather than later.

TWO: INTELLECT

They’re so smart, well read, and kept up-to-date on all current events as they make it their business to be, but their heart — Izzy’s fickle, fickle heart — and the madness it contains is almost too strong for the sharpest of minds to compete with. It’s taken them a long while to learn how to balance that fire that resides deep within their chest, the flames licking along the edges of their heart against the natural intellect and heaps of knowledge embedded inside their mind. It’s a constant battle, from one moment to the next a fight between head and heart, and sometimes — a lot of the time, if they’re being truthful — their heart wins. They can’t help it; they feel so deeply. This was always something their mother encouraged, though. To not feel is to not live, she’d say but as Izzy aged, the more they were penalized for daring to do such a thing. The more tears they shed, the dirtier the looks were from their peers and the less they were listened to. But the farther Izzy is pushed, the more these horrible people get away with ruining an entire city, the more likely Izzy is to crumble and crack under pressure. The results of which could be catastrophic for not only her but everyone else. This is a daily struggle for Izzy, balancing decision making between what they feel is right and what they know is probable. As of late that intellect they’re so proud of has taken a bit of a back seat in favor of such strong emotions. I think it’s entirely possible that Izzy will make a very poor decision based on what their heart wants versus what they know is the right choice. And furthermore I want them to make that decision! Whether its furthering their trust in Nikolai even though they know they shouldn’t. There’s no going back once the deed is done; you can’t take back decisions of a vengeful heart, you can only move forward once they’re made. That’s the funny thing about love, especially when Izzy since loves so intensely. And they’re the type of person who will do anything their heart tells them to. Anything.

THREE: HUBRIS

Working with the likes of Puck and Nikolai, Izzy has gained a certain confidence. Everything has been going their way and they’ve gotten exactly what they wanted. But does Izzy truly even know what that is? I think whether the Montagues and Capulets live or die has become a second burner problem for them right now. The light of the sun is far too bright for them to make out anything other than the vengeance that has been so prevalent in their vision for so long. And the successful ruination at the Northern Grove has only made them more confident that what they’re doing, this mission they’re on, is exactly the right answer. I want to develop this further as Izzy will surely begin to dance with many a devil in the streets of Verona. The only way to win a war is to secure allied forces and then strike. But will they be foolish enough to trust the devil himself? I don’t know that Izzy will be able to see past a fatal deceit as they cascade closer and closer to the sun. If only they could just reach it. Touch it. It’d make everything better, wouldn’t it? If they can just get it, that holy grail, that one vital piece of information that could make the whole house of cards come crashing down, it’d all be worth it. Every sacrifice, every life lost. At least that’s what they tell themselves. But what of the hero who thinks themselves a god? It’s one thing to save people for the sake of saving them but it is an entirely different kind of monster to demand they revere you for your work. I’d love to put Izzy in a situation in which there’s the chance to put their name on one of the many good deeds they do! They’ve lived a life of modesty for so long, even going so far as to conceal their true surname, but how will they fair if they start to garner recognition? I can’t wait to find out.

Are you comfortable with killing off your character? | Yes.

In Depth

In-Character Interview:

What is your favorite place in Verona?

She first thinks of To Tame A Soup and all the people it helps, all the mouths it feeds and the beds it offers to those in need of a warm night’s sleep. It brings a smile to her face, eyes lulling shut as she leans back in the couch. The question, on the lips of someone she doesn’t trust but is indebted to for exactly this purpose, begs to be answered. Truthfully. Thankfully the first lesson she’d learned when she’d arrived in Verona was how to lie, something every citizen needs to become proficient in if they intend to survive.

“The Library,” she lied with a smile and a slight cant of her head. “All those books,” she leans in close, eyes widening at the mention of literature, which wasn’t a falsehood by the slightest. It’s always better to tell an adjacent truth. The advice sings in her head like a sweet melody she’ll never forget. “I could spend hours in there,” she smiles, thinking back to the past five Sundays she has spent there. At least a dozen books all spread out across the table before her, laptop open as she typed furiously, looking from one text to the other every so often.

From a distance, she looked as inconspicuous as anyone. A student studying for an exam, that was her cover, and naturally, it worked. Her notes, however, would beg to differ, covering nothing from the books before her but instead noting every Montague who came and went.

“But I’m sure I’m not the only one who loves it there.”

What does your typical day look like?

“It depends if I’m on a deadline,” she clears her throat and adjusts in her seat, letting the deception fall off her shoulders as she rests back again. “If I am, I wake early and head out to find a quiet place to write,” her eyes wander over to her desk in the corner, papers littered about. “It’s hard for me to write here most times. There’s too much to distract me,” she lets out a small laugh, self-deprecating in its tone. “I have horrible impulse control.”

“I volunteer as much as I can throughout the week when I’m not working as well, but other than that…” arms now crossed, one hand drifts up and she begins to tap an index finger against her chin as she thinks back over the past week, “I like the theater…” she’s grasping at straws now, quite nervous to tell them she rather enjoys just sitting at home most nights.

“I’m relatively boring, I suppose.”

What has been your biggest mistake thus far?

Falling in love.

Izzy doesn’t even have to think before the answer comes to her in a rushing tidal wave of bittersweet happiness, the image of Celeste peeking into her closed eyes. Now that is the truest answer of them all and it’s something she’d never want Celeste to know. Regret is never something Izzy wants to carry around, but at this point, the guise of calm, cool, and collected is bound to shatter. The thought breaks her heart in this moment, sitting before a stranger asking shallow questions one moment and asking Izzy to bear her soul the next. Tears sting in her eyes the moment she opens them, the dam that rests between her head and her heart threatening to break at any moment.

“I’m not sure…” she stutters, unable to form the right words — unable to come up with a suitable lie on the spot. She repeats the same gesture as before, one arm raising to rest beneath her chin as an index finger taps furiously against her chin. This time it rises and runs along her bottom lip. The truth is Izzy has never had to look this deep inside. She’s never been asked to critique her own character, nor should she. She is always justified in any of her actions and has to answer to no one.

“Next question,” she says firmly, digit rising a couple more inches to wipe away the one tear that broke through. It’s damp against the pad of her finger but she doesn’t linger and wipes it away on her knee.

Head: 1 Heart: 0

What has been the most difficult task asked of you?

In an instant, she’s agitated. Frustrated beyond belief at the audacity of this person that she barely knows asking all these questions of which they have no right to the answer.She was doing them the favor after all, so how dare they?

“This,” she blurted, eyes rolling too fast for her to stop herself.

Head: 1 Heart: 1

Fuck.

What are your thoughts on the war between the Capulets and the Montagues?

The mere mention of them is enough to cause her to clench her fists where she sits. She clenches so tight a knuckle cracks and she plays it off by cracking a few more and forcing a complacent smile onto her features.

“Truthfully?” she asks as calmly as she can, but she can’t resist the offer to say her piece. If they really wanted to know, Izzy would tell them exactly what she thinks. “I think they’re going to rip this city a part.” Her statement is matter of fact, concluded with a nod and a stern look of intent at the asker. It’s a truth she believes deep in her bones, all the way into her core. “They will take what they want,” her teeth grind against the t, “kill who they want.” There’s a flash in her mind of her mother, knife slipping between her ribs as she cries out in pain. Izzy clenches her fists once more, pushing them to either side of her thighs against the couch. “They corrupt whoever they like and care not for who they hurt.”

And I’ll take down every last one of them.

She’s seething now, nails digging into her own palms to keep her from smashing them against something, like the face of the person before her.

“Is that enough?” she asks, again through gritted teeth, but she doesn’t wait for an answer and instead rises from her seat. “Great.” She snaps,  walking across the living room and opening the front door to her apartment.

“Leave.”

Head: 1 Heart: 2

Extras:

Pinterest Mockblog

HEADCANONS:

— ASTROLOGY: Born March 24th, Izzy is an Aries.       +Element: fire - quite emotional and compassionate to a fault, always giving far more than they receive if for no other reason than to remain loyal to those emotions.       + Ruler: mars - an animalistic nature, it calls to their impetuous tendencies, inciting rage and destruction at the drop of a hat.       + Color(s): red - vibrant and attention-seeking, it’s rare that they don it but are instead often drawn to its excitement and promise of adventure.

— STRENGTHS: audacious, determined, self-assured, ardent, creative, insightful, altruistic, honest.

— WEAKNESSES: impatient, sensitive, moody, short-tempered, perfectionistic, impulsive, contentious.

— MBTI: INFJ, the advocate - takes great happiness from helping people, spends the time to get to the root of issues and work through them, sees a world full of inequity but knows it doesn’t have to be that way, and truly believes a little help can go a long way, but sometimes they forget to care for themselves and overcorrect for certain causes which puts them in jeopardy, though they write it off as having been worth it all in the end if progress was made.

— ALIGNMENT: Lawful Neutral, the judge - their mother, the basis of their entire moral compass, taught them right from wrong and shaped their entire view of the world with just a few kind acts. Feeding the homeless was something they did every Sunday afternoon together, mother and daughter each with smiles upon their face, filled with joy at the simple act of helping. But it wasn’t until they watched the very woman who gave them life fight tooth and nail, time and time again for those less fortunate than them. Their mother would have offered a stranger on the street the clothes off her back and the shoes on her feet if she felt it would improve their life. She was generous and kind and expected nothing in return for all her good deeds. It taught Izzy how to love, this ever apparent generosity present throughout their youth, and as they aged, they did so with their whole heart. They dove head first into philanthropy the moment they left Spain, using their knack for words to shine a light on the injustices of the world in hopes of making a real change. And they have no intent on stopping within Verona. They’ll burn the whole city down if it means it’ll return, but this time just and pure of heart.

— GENDER/SEXUALITY: Izzy, while not a fan of labels at all and if forced, identifies as a demigirl and prefers she/her and they/them pronouns. Femininity has never been something they’ve felt terribly attached to, nor do they shy away from what society would deem as ‘for women’, but there’s always been a bit of a disconnect from it. It’s a sore subject if pressed, causing Izzy immense stress when brought up. Memories of their stepmother spewing hate for every little thing about them flood their mind and tears swell in their eyes from the echo of rejection for simply being themself. / They’d call themselves a lover of everyone, if they’re being honest. At least ten times a day they turn smitten in an instant! With just one glance from a handsome stockbroker who held the door for them at a cafe. A coy smile from a waitress at Hotel Emelia can send them into a giggling fit, cheeks flushing a rosy red. They’re a biromantic, through and through, enjoying — indulging in whoever’s holding their heart in their palm for the moment, regardless of their gender. But for them to give themselves to you, it needs to mean something. It has to matter. Izzy is smart; they know their heart is fickle, and while most days it rules their choices, those welcome in their bed must earn it first. Some would call them a slut, if they were lacking character and down to their two brain cells. Most call them a tease, leaving a trail of kisses in their indecisive wake. But Izzy knows themself to be demisexual, and in need of a strong emotional bond before spreading their legs.

— CELESTE: It defies logic, how much Izzy loves her. All normal, rational thought evades her whenever the girl is near. The fact that she remains, to this day, a part of one of the very organizations Izzy is bound and determined to take down seemingly makes no difference. Not when her heart practically sings in the face of Celeste Duval. It’s assuredly unnatural, of which the two have discussed at length. She’s married, after all and that fact seems to evade her lover’s mind as well. Perhaps that’s what makes it exciting, but it’s also what makes it that much more stressful. Izzy is in constant battle with herself when it comes to Celeste. It’s as if each time they’re apart, she formulates a plan to sever the bond for the good of the both of them, but the moment she lays eyes on Celeste, she can’t think. She can only feel. And what she feels is so much stronger than any argument her brain could muster. But is Izzy willing to sacrifice everything for her? Deep down she knows the answer and deep down she hates herself for it.

— NIKOLAI: He’s so handsome, of this she’s positive simply because of the way his smile causes her heart to race. To say she fell in love with him the first moment they met would be entirely accurate, for he knew exactly what to say to tug at her weaknesses. By far one of her worst qualities, she wears her heart on her sleeve, like an open wound laid bare for anyone to rub salt in. Though deep down, she always hopes it’ll be sugar. She always wants to believe the best in people, and certainly the same goes for Nik. He was so earnest during their first talks, so generous with his information and sympathetic to her cause, to her fight for justice within the bloodied streets of Verona. She barely had time to check on him, to look him up and sink her teeth into his past like any good journalist would. If she isn’t careful, he could expose her entire plot, but damn if he doesn’t have the deepest of sea blue eyes. And each time he’s near, all careful planning and hard earned wisdom Izzy has gathered fades away in favor of going for a swim.

— DELILAH: It breaks her heart to see a good woman silenced, especially when she’s been falsely promised so much. The Capulets appease her doubts over and over, each time she dares to break her silence if but just for a moment; but Izzy can see the storm behind her eyes, if only Delilah would let the floodgates flow open. With the whisper of a few secrets and a pen put to paper, the entire underbelly of Verona could rest in the palm of their hands. All she needs is a little push. And Izzy has every intention of doing so, no matter what.