#sometimes i'm all happy that my interests are niche and sometimes it makes me feel othered and physically ill

[therevengeoffrankenstein]

am a little bitter that multiple of my primary interests only surge in popularity (aka people only ever talk about them) during the september-october(-november too sometimes but usually only the beginning of the month) period of the year. they are a year-round thing for me and most of the other people who are into them year-round too either have me blocked or are blocked by me.

and things like the general rise of gothlit fandom in recent years has made the non-hammer tags mostly unusable for finding people to follow/talk to about my interests besides OMG Friend Jonathan ! + the rampant bigotism is so bad it makes me sick to my stomach with stress and disgust. so even though now i can find people who like one (1) of my interests the tags are too oversaturated for me to actually benefit from it. and still none of you want to touch the hammer films, which is truly where my interest hits its highest peak 😭

[zelenbug]

Omg... I saw your speculative biology post about rayman creatures, i am so weak for those!

Do you have any more headcanons you could tell me about? Personally I'm most interested in the Teensies and flies (ahem, Murfy) but you can tell me about anyone you feel like. I'd see it as a win either way :D

If you want to offcourse!

surprised this wasnt as niche as i expected ! i dont really have much more to say that i havent mentioned in the post but this is giving me something to fink about so im happy to pull some more out of my brain

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teensies have pupils in much the same way mice and rats etc do. its just that they have really dark colored irises so you cant see the pupils under most conditions. however some teensies are weird and have really light irises, as in these guys. the eyes are set up like the same otherwise

globteens case is explainable with how incredibly pale he is. he might just have some kind of leucism

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also i concluded from rayman 3 that they have 2 toes on their feet and this is the closest visual approximation

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something i also concluded from rayman 3 is that teensy heights vary a LOT. several are taller than rayman! explicitly! and i think it gave romeo permanent back problems hence his incredible posture (i have no idea why ottos posture is really weird but in like, the opposite way, why is he this upright)

most teensies still live up to their name, but some ethnic groups will tend to be noticeably taller, like sylkins tufkins nookins (especially nookins) etc. but they can all be randomly tall. i think this is a given for any species of anything but its kind of notable for the people literally named teensies, also just how much the heights seem to vary (this is obtained with raymap also, theyre not found on the same map but the heights are relative to rayman and should be accurate)

its funny sometimes my headcanons are just . descriptions of things that literally are canon. but like. you get me this is something that is remarkable in my hc lore

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nose does has cartilage in it (gotta protect the magic organ thing somehow) but its still like. very squeezable. makes a honk through cartoon logic, hurts some people if honked though (Ales Mansay)

speaking of him. if the magic organ is broken, its still like. present it just doesnt function well. i have no idea what it actually looks like other than some kind of blob thing that takes up most of the schnozzle (with some space for like. the nasal cavity). the closest thing i could think of is. the melon on cetaceans. i dont know if itd be like that i just think it wouldnt be much like a brain??? its hard to imagine An Organ Dedicated Specifically To Synthesizing Magic.

ive been thinking about it but im not sure if other species have that too, just much smaller placed somewhere else on the head, just allowing them to use magic. i think i like it better if Everyone gets access to it regardless of having An Organ Dedicated Specifically To Synthesizing Magic

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i doodled baby murfy once

greenbottle larvae dont tend to talk much, or do much other than eat rotted meat all day. you cant really socialize or play games with them or anything

they dont end up remembering how it was like to be a larva or a pupa. pupating would feel like going to bed for like a week and then you wake up suddenly having conciousness and wings. its around this time they get named too, larvae are treated almost like a weird pet that will suddenly turn into a person eventually

also like, imagine the adaptation period after emerging from the pupa. its like being a 13 year old and a newborn at the same time. they do adapt fairly quickly though, one whos 15 or even 14 (both ages equivalent, not glade years) can already seem pretty normal

also the actual hatchday, and the day they stop being a pupa, are treated as separate, so its like they get TWO free birthdays! unless the dates overlap

much of this Larva Information applies to the other bugs as well. they have larvae and then pupate and then emerge as actual concious beings

[dribs-and-drabbles]

Get to Know Me Tag :)

I was tagged by @telomeke and @hughungrybear. Thanks for tagging me!

do you make your bed?

It depends... I live in the part of the world where it's usual to have a duvet in a duvet cover and a sheet covering the mattress, and I have a duvet twice the width of my bed so it usually doesn't get rucked up during the night, so when I get up I fold over the top third of the duvet to air out the mattress/sheet. If it's a work day, it will stay like this until I get home, then I will usually pull the duvet back over the bed. If it's a weekend, I might make the bed again midday. I like it when my bed looks made.

what's your favourite number?

I'm not sure why but I like the number 7, and then also the numbers 4 and 3 because they make up 7. I've never really considered numbers beyond single digits to be 'favourites'. But if I did it would be my birthday day. Oh and I don't really use favourite numbers as important passwords or pins or the such...jsyk.

what is your job?

The work I do is quite niche, so I never really want to say too much because I'm pretty discoverable online with a few key words...but then sometimes I really want y'all to know what I do because it's unusual (and, I think, quite cool!)...but without revealing too much I work in the arts sector - specifically dance.

if you could go back to school, would you?

School, as in aged 11-16? Absolutely the hell no. But school as in higher education, degrees, masters, or smaller qualifications for my general interests? Well, I sort of did a few years ago (*she looks at the calendar and realises it's more than 'a few'*). I did a Creative Writing Masters over 2019-2020, which was GREAT to do but sort of killed my spirit and drive to be a writer...but whatever, I can always pick it back up again in the future if it returns. I also went to classes to learn Swedish when I lived in Sweden and I'm going to a different language class now one evening a week. I enjoy studying...but I get too focused on getting good grades.

can you parallel park?

Yes but I only do it when the space is big enough for me to confidently do it (especially with all these sensors beeping nowadays) and usually only on the side of the road opposite to the steering wheel (I can drive on both sides of the road).

a job you had that would surprise people?

I think my whole career is probably surprising to people but in the sense that I think people are mostly confused because they don't really understand what I really do on a day to day basis.

do you think aliens are real?

I think it would be incredible if in this whole universe we are the only planet who has developed 'life'. Aliens don't necessarily have to be intelligent life like us (and that's debatable sometimes!), so yes, I think somewhere in this universe there is another planet which has the conditions for some form of life, whether we could survive there or not.

can you drive a manual car?

Yes, I learnt on one and have managed to adapt to both right-hand and left-hand gear sticks, although I'm still a little 'fumbly' with the right-hand gear stick. I prefer automatics when in a traffic jam but otherwise I'm happy to drive whichever. Sometimes it's good to have something to focus on when driving, so a manual is good. The problem happens if I've used different hire cars in a short period of time (which I need to do sometimes with work) and when I forget I'm in a manual and brake coming up to to a junction and just...stall because I forget to change down gears 😂

what's your guilty pleasure?

If a guilty pleasure is something I'd feel shy or embarrassed admitting or talking to others about...then it would probably be watching ql or reading fanfic 😂 Other than that I'm not sure I have anything...I enjoy what I enjoy and don't feel guilt over it.

tattoos?

No but I've always thought about getting one but I think the thought of the work I'd have to do to find someone I would really trust to permanently mark my skin means I've just never done it. But I would like some kind of minimalist abstract colour art that starts on my shoulder and trails down my arm. Maybe. I've never been able to find exactly what I'm imagining, which is also why I've never pursued it.

favorite color?

I think I'm in my blue stage in my life, looking at the majority of colours surrounding me, but I also like pops of red.

favorite type of music?

The music playlists I listen to most are 1) OSTs and similar style songs from all the qls I've watched over the past 3 years 2) the instrumental background music from all the qls I've watched and 3) Swedish pop (to keep the language fresh in my brain). I do like all kinds of music - just NOT drum and bass - anything can work for me in the right mood.

do you like puzzles?

Yes, although I don't often do them. I enjoy the 'escape room' type Exit games as well as sudoku, and for a few months several years ago I really got into hanjie puzzles.

any phobias?

I'm not sure if this is a phobia or not but I absolutely CANNOT deal with cotton wool. Just thinking about pulling it apart makes me want to crawl out of my skin and lay down in a bath of acid just to get away from it let alone actually TOUCHING it and pulling it apart 🤢🤮 The cotton wool pads are ok because they have smooth sides and I don't...pull 🤮 them 🤮 apart 🤮. Ok, I gotta stop talking about this now, I'm squirming in my seat.

favorite childhood sport?

I did gymnastics as a child, from about aged 8 to 13, but I don't know if that counts as a 'sport', although I did compete. I didn't really enjoy most ball sports as a kid.

do you talk to yourself?

ALL. THE. DAMN. TIME. I talk to myself in my head. I talk to myself out loud. Sometimes, if I'm talking to myself aloud about something important and then do something that means I can't continue (cleaning my teeth, drinking/eating etc) then for some reason I can't continue in my head. I have to wait until I'm finished to then talk out loud again. But I also talk to myself aloud when I'm out 😬 but I do it quietly and without moving my mouth too much so people don't notice. I was in a shop recently and a gentleman was talking to himself out loud (commenting on the offering of tea towels ikea had and wondering whether to buy any) - loud enough that I thought that he was actually talking to someone else but he wasn't - and I felt like I had a glimpse of my future if I wasn't careful 😂

what movies do you adore?

I don't watch a lot of movies nowadays - the last I saw was Barbie. But the one that has stayed with me as a favourite since I first saw it is Some Kind of Wonderful. And I love The Holiday as a Christmas movie (although I haven't watched it for ages). Oh and it's not a movie, so maybe doesn't count, but the BBC's adaptation of Pride and Prejudice has my whole heart.

coffee or tea?

I'm definitely a tea drinker (approx 3 cups of black Earl Grey plus one or two herbal teas every day) but sometimes I'll crave a coffee...but then I'll have decaf. I'll crave it because I think the milkiness of it (oat milk though) makes it feel like a comfort drink, and I like a small shot of gingerbread syrup in it too.

first thing you wanted to be growing up?

I remember things like 'lawyer', 'journalist', and 'doctor' were common aspirations when I was a kid which I also contemplated but when I decided I wanted to be a dancer at aged 13 that was it for me. My 'back-up' career plan was some kind of palaeontology or archaeology ("you get an -ology you're a scientist!" 😂) but I never needed to pursue that.

Onward tagging: I'm not sure by now who has done this or not, so I'll tag some people and if you have done it then tag me in your post so I can read it! @grapejuicegay @dimplesandfierceeyes @casualavocados @ranchthoughts @jourquet @lollygirlpops @airenyah @incandescentflower and @linosaur

Like @telomeke, I also get tagged now and then by others in various tag games but then get too busy with work to be able to do them. So if you've tagged me and I've not responded, please know that I really wanted to but I just didn't have the time and then probably forgot.

[werepuppy-steve]

taylor (@steddie-island) and i have been in the trenches for the past week creating the most beautiful (and smutty) steddissy au and i'm very 🥹🥹🥹🥹🥹 about it. it's still mostly headcanons right now with inklings of plot sprinkled in, so i thought i should make a worldbuilding post about it since it's officially being added to my wip pile <3

tagging some people i think would be interested in this: @dangerous-disposition @tboybuck @patchworkgargoyle @thefreakandthehair @starryeyedjanai

@corrodedbisexual @sidekick-hero @spectrum-spectre @munsondickprint @augustjustice

@worstsequence @rozzieroos

it doesn't get real graphic under the cut but putting it under one bc it's a lil long

the beginnings of it are touched on here, but it's expanded a little bit.

it's a modern au. steddissy are still in that platonic/friends with benefits stage: steve and eddie are dating but chrissy is very happy and content being single. she likes that it gives her more freedom to do things without having a controlling partner breathing down her neck every time she turns around.

they're streamers. i don't have their niche's fleshed out yet but they do collabs with each other a lot.

we went into dirty details in dms about the three of them sexting constantly, which turns into them rolling out their onlyfans accounts. they already have so many things filmed just from their texts alone, so why not make money off of it?

some more headcanons and ideas were thrown around (along with taylor giving me snippets of her own steddissy wips that you should def ask her about if she's willing to share them 👀) that i'll probably make a separate post for.

it's been established that chrissy is a squirter

but between all the filthy smut, there's love. so much of it that i get choked up just thinking about it.

i started thinking of people who are in mostly online spaces and have probably never interacted with the queer community in real life, and how they wouldn't have the kindest opinions.

so eddie would get all of these tweets that are like "you're gay but you enjoy having sex with a woman??? [confused math lady] make it make sense." he ignores them at first because randos on the internet aren't entitled to his relationships, but it becomes frequent enough that he starts getting accused of "calling himself gay for clout" and dragging steve and chrissy into it, and then he has to address it.

he does it in a video because he's still dramatic.

"having sex with a woman doesn't make me not gay. i've been gay since i was 15 and a boy gave me my first hickey. chrissy is my platonic partner. yes, she's very cute and adorable and it makes me want to scream sometimes, but i'm not attracted to her because she's a woman. i'm attracted to her because she's my best friend and my feelings for her run so much deeper than romantic love. chrissy doesn't even label herself with a sexuality. she just likes people.

steve is my boyfriend. i'm romantically involved with him and physically attracted to him because he's a man. steve, however, is bi, so he does find chrissy attractive as a woman, and there's nothing wrong with that. they're also not interested in dating each other. the three of us fool around with each other because it's fun and we like making each other feel good and we trust each other. it's nobody else's business what we do."

and because he's a petty little shit (a trait he learned from steve) he posts a video of him and chrissy having the most tendernasty missionary sex, complete with kissing and hand holding.

then it turned into the three of them being roommates. and then somewhere along the line it turned into chrissy being steve and eddie's surrogate and the three of them coparenting (a big win for steve "breeding kink" harrington), because at this stage in their relationship, they're pretty secure in knowing that chrissy is their life partner. they're not Together together, but they know she's not going anywhere.

i think that for them to get to this point, something would've had to happen between chrissy and someone outside of their relationship. someone she's had frequent collabs on onlyfans with, who maybe wanted something more and called her a hypocrite when she said she wasn't looking for anything serious, because of steve and eddie, and wouldn't listen when she insisted that it was different with them.

she tells the boys this and it turns into her coming with sobs of "i'm yours" as she rides steve while eddie fucks him. taylor mentioned they dp her and i said that that would be the moment it kind of clicks for them that this is how they were always meant to be.

and it gave me thoughts about possibly arospec chrissy. she loves her boys with her entire being, but she knows it's not romantic love. like eddie says, it feels deeper than that. to call it "romantic" almost feels like it cheapens their relationship (she knows it doesn't, she knows that eddie and steve's romantic feelings for each other are real and just as important). she's not sure if she's ever felt romantic love for anyone.

and that's all we have for now, outside of the smut alkgjldkfgj. none of them actually care about who the kid belongs to. they've got chrissy's light hair and dark eyes.

[blackbirdffxiv]

I wanted to come by and say thank you so much for all your amazing hair ports! I'm also wondering how or why you got into modding and if its easy for anyone to do?? Or any tips for those who want to get into it? Hope you have a lovely evening!

No need to thank me, but I do appreciate the support regardless (it actually makes me super happy to see people enjoy my work, it makes the effort worth it)

As to why I got into modding, the short version is when I got into it because I wanted to have mods for myself instead of paying god knows how much money for someone else to make/port something for me. The longer story is basically what I said above but with more detail: I play the races that are considered "the niche races" as I've heard some people in the modding community call them ( I have a variety of theories why they don't port to "the niche races", but I don't need a witch hunt after me).

About two years ago, the final straw was when I asked a hair modder if they had plans on porting a hair to highlander, as it was a paid hair that I bought because it said "for hyur" (and in reality: it was only midlander). They told me "you can port it yourself if you want it for your race :)" (smiley face and all), and I not only showed great restraint on my infamous hot temper, but I started to learn how to port hair myself.

Once I started to get better at it? I thought "why not try other races", so I tried knocking hairs out for multiple races, including the popular ones, but realized that NONE of them used the hairs I ported. The ones that were though were elezens, roes, and highlanders. And I'd often hear from elezen, roe and highlander players how they were glad to see SOMEONE doing something for them, and I will admit, it fed my ego, I got a lil big for my britches at times (but who doesn't?).

But it also gave me the desire to do more for them; it made me happy to make others happy, and to hear people feel like they're FINALLY getting to be able to get nice stuff like everyone else does. I also mod because despite my gripes: I do enjoy modding, it gives me a sense of fulfillment, and it makes me happy to see others happy. Even moreso if I see friends using the stuff I create.

I also encourage everyone to get into modding if they have a desire to, but I cannot emphasize enough: do NOT get into modding if your only desire is to make a quick buck out of it, it will not end well for you. Do I think creators deserve compensation for their work? Absolutely, but I've seen creators set themselves up on a long path of failure disguised as success because as soon as they learned the very bare bones of modding? They immediately started charging for it, and then broke down if they got complaints about it, or if someone shared it, etc.

And then there's the need to keep up with demand, and the burnout that follows (this also happens to free modders; it happened to me three times). Burnout is extremely common with modders, paid and free, especially if you rely on modding in XIV for income (which is HIGHLY discouraged due to modding in XIV being on shaky ground on a constant basis). Burnout not only kills your desire for modding when it happens, but it can even just ruin your desire to even log into XIV (I speak from experience; there was a period of time I didn't log in for two weeks because of modding burnout).

I could go on for hours on the benefits and cons of modding, but despite what I say: I do think if you're interested in modding, even if its just for yourself/your friends? You should go for it; there's thankfully a number of guides out there to get you started, hell, sometimes just EXPERIMENTING is better than nothing (it's how I learned!) and eventually it just clicks.

Plus there's just a sense of fulfillment knowing if you want something you can just make it yourself, and there's something rewarding about making something for yourself, looking at it and going "Holy shit I did that". And there's also the fact that if you want something done for yourself, you don't need to go to anyone asking for help; you can just sit down one moment when you're free and just do it, and you can pat yourself on the back knowing you did it on your own.

The TLDR:

I appreciate the support on my mods; I like modding, I think everyone who is interested should look into trying to get into it, but please please PLEASE be mindful of what you're doing if you get further into it. Remember the risks, and don't do it out of greed because it will come back and bite you.

[egg-emperor]

Initially I lost a lot when I started being myself here even harder and not holding back on anything I wanna say but now it's so freeing knowing I'm surrounded by people I don't have to hide things from in fear of being outcased again. Now I'm left with people that expect me to be a weird pervert freak that talks about wanting to fuck Eggman, is too autistic and passionate and precise about the things I love, and exist and express myself at earnestly and unapologetically in ways many others cringe at- but those people actually like it this time

The things that people hated me and tried to make me be ashamed of and encouraged me hide to be someone they liked better as if it was the only way I'd ever be liked and accepted are now the very same things that other people actually like about me now. It's a really nice feeling to be truly accepted. To not have to live up to some idea of what people want me to be of some perfect unflawed unembrassing pure unproblematic sqeaky clean person with all the right interests and takes to be good enough for the morally righteous ones

Being around that was so miserable and suffocating for years. I'm so happy to be free because I chose being myself and losing them instead of keeping them and losing myself. And now I get to be a weird passionate freak freely and openly and I have cool friends, mutuals, followers, and askers that know it and see it as something interesting, fun, funny, or can relate to me. Whatever it may be- it's positive and that makes me really happy. And I don't live with the pressure of the possibility of everyone hating me if I make one wrong move

I also like how most of the time it's a pretty good drama free place on my blog now. Sometimes people discover my kink stuff elsewhere and come to complain in my inbox, some people clearly don't understand where I stand on things despite posts of mine speaking for themself, or make assumptions that I'd somehow be on the bandwagon of some latest drama and expect me to echo their sentiments so I just don't answer lol, some onesided beef and stalkers and other silly things like but most aren't people that are actually frequent visitors of my blog

the majority of you are really cool and chill and bring some fun and life to my blog and inbox daily and I appreciate that a lot :) I used to feel like I was alone after a big harrasment campaign happened and I was blocked by all the popular blog cliques and all their followers but now I don't want it or miss it at all. Now I feel like I have a place with my niche and what I lost and the numbers don't matter to me because it was worth it all to just be me and do what I love and find the cool people who can handle me XD Thank you for that 💜

[dreamgirljune]

Hi 💐 I adore your poetry and I had a question. How would you suggest to improve poetry? I write and I've posted here as well but never received any proper feedback which I can use. Tips?

hello!!! this is so sweet, thank u for the support and i'm so honored u'd want my advice.

first of all, im gonna say poetry is a very individual thing, and what works for one person doesn't work for others. also, if u'd like me to critique specific works, i could probably be more thorough and i am so happy to do so, but that's obviously entitely up to u.

that being said, here's some things i've learned.

1. don't write what you think people will like, write what works in ur brain. this doesn't mean it has to be smth u have directly experienced, but more so an emphasis on having smth that matters to u more than smth u think others will care abt. i've found that my poems that have received the most love are the ones i thought "this is so niche and specific, i have no idea if anyone will relate to this or like this at all." as cheesy as it sounds, being honest in whatever way that works for u rlly is best

2. this is actually a rule i believe i heard abt comedy, but i find it rings very true of poetry as well: combine the specific w the broad. there are certain points of humanity i think are shown pretty much across the board. finding the very exact and nitty gritty feelings and thoughts and expressing that is usually what makes a great poem. to give an example, all of us are lonely sometimes. what makes writing abt it interesting could be writing smth like feeling lonely when u go to the grocery store, wishing u had someone to grab something from the top shelf for u and hold ur hand in the dairy aisle.

3. this is more personal preference, but i like the opening and closing lines to kinda form a circle. i don't know how to explain this exactly, but i like it all kinda come back to this point, not necessarily in words but more so in theme. i especially like when something's changed, and the same idea now has new nuance. a good example of this from my works would be in the world is ending. i began with the sentiment "there's nothing i can do about it" and ended with "it will be enough" both involve a lack of control, but where it began with helplessness, it ended with acceptance.

4. experiment!! try so many cool things!!! change up spacing and structures! try new words and phrases! use repitition! use long lines, use short phrases! the best way to find your specific writing niche is through trial and error.

5. similarly, in terms of gaining skill in writing poetry, quantity over quality. the best way to write a poem u love is to write a hundred u think are garbage. eventually u learn what works for u, but more than that, practice really does make perfect. or at least better. i started off writing the cringiest, most angsty and awful poems u can imagine. since u already have been writing and posting, u've already started this. but don't let urself get so frustrated u stop writing. writing is so beautiful and healing and wonderful. if u love it, keep it in ur heart forever and don't let it go.

this has already been so long so i think im gonna stop there. i hope this was helpful, i am by no means an expert and i am sure none of this is new advice. i bet ur writing is rlly cool!! and regardless, we all have smth worth saying, and im proud of u for saying it.

be warm and well fed

[seokjinsonlyone]

Ari hi! This thought just came to me. You know those “this is what your bias says about you” yeah I think you should do that! Like I literally love your headcanons and takes on members so I think you’d kill this too! I know you’re a working woman, getting your bag and all so no rush with this or even if you didn’t want to, its all good! Lol

first of all THANK YOOOUUU crazy the amount of faith you have in me 🤪 it's funny bc when i first read this i was like i don't even know if i'm capable of that but then immediately after my lil brain started churning SO

this is what i think your bias says about you:

jin: chaotic and unserious; like really just be doing stuff just to do it; treats life like a social experiment probably; don’t take yourself or anything really too serious; but at the end of the day you handle your bidness; big proponent of rest and relaxation; got a rebellious spirit like you really just have a level of autonomy that you have to have like you bend where you can but if you can’t you don’t; you’re probably hot like even if you’re not physically you got that hot state of mind

yoongi: you got issues <333 like you’re probably mentally ill in one way or another; you probably have an rbf; you know exactly what you wanna do and you gonna make it happen one way or another like there’s just a tenacity about you that makes things work; you probably always late; you’re as soft as you are sharp like you got a big heart and you’re not afraid to show it but at the same time you not about to sit up there and be treated any kind of way; you probably always up to something be plotting and scheming sometimes it amounts to something 

hobi: you’re loud and energetic like there’s just something about you that screams rainbows and unicorns; probably a horse girl; chronically online; a little cringe but also very cool; you like to have a good time; a little air headed at times but also you always know what to do and not afraid to take charge; you have some kind of natural talent and are good/can get good at multiple other things; you probably have a good fashion sense and an affinity toward chunky shoes

joon: you’re kind like you’re always looking out for other people and willing to put their needs above your own; you’re an over thinker; you probably got a temper; there’s an obsessive side to you like sometimes you just can’t like things a normal amount; as mature and capable as you are you’re also like a little lost puppy like you’re probably a lawyer who gets off work and calls their mommy to get step by step instructions on how to make spaghetti; you probably out the house more than you in the house

jimin: you’re a hard worker; you have goals and you’re going to reach them no matter what; you like a sour patch kid like there’s a streak of evil within you but also you’re very sweet; you’re probably in a constant state of existential crises; lowkey intimidating; got that 1d syndrome like you don’t know you’re beautiful and that’s what makes you beautiful; despite being in the midst of modern society you probably don’t know what’s going on; former gifted kid

tae: you probably feel like you were born in the wrong generation; babygirl; you probably have a lot of guilty pleasures and struggle with a couple vices; you have a diverse music taste; hard headed; if you saw a shooting star you’d probably wish for either world peace or a stick of bubble gum there is no in between; you feel things very deeply; super creative; you just want everyone to be happy frfr; secretly a furry

jk: your head is in the clouds; probably a hopeless romantic; you had an alt phase complete with 6 layers of eyeliner and side swept bangs; you like things done in a sequential manner; you probably shut down when you’re frustrated; you have at least 3 niche interests like if i asked you could probably tell me the current active volcanoes and their most recent eruptions or something; you like sets and collections; you probably stay up late at night; you unabashedly enjoy pop music; hello kitty girl 

so like was i way off or what 👁️👄👁️

[diezmil10000]

hi 👋 you can call me diez or chisi

i am from spain and i like to draw lesbians. this is my main blog, if you're only here for my art and not for my reblogs you can follow my art-only blog!!

(FAQ under the cut)

what software and brushes do you use?

i work on ibisPaint X and Krita on a Samsung Galaxy Tab S6 Lite. i use a lot of different brushes for lineart but mostly these ones:

are your commissions open?

i will never do commissions, but thank you for your interest.

will you someday sell your art through an online shop / convention?

no, but feel free to print my stuff in good quality paper if you want to hang it on your wall.

how can i financially support you?

i have no need for that right now. please give your money to other artists or organizations.

can i repost your art / use it for edits?

i don't encourage it, but i don't mind. asking for permission and linking back to any of my social media would be appreciated too ♡ just don't use it for commercial purposes (sell merch, use as streaming layouts, etc)

how do you do X part of your drawing?

i recommend checking my speedpaints if you're curious, the name of the videos is the day i finished that drawing in YYMMDD format (as in, year-month-day). i also made a tag for my art thoughts, but if you still have a question feel free to send me an ask and i'll try my best to explain it!!

where did you learn anatomy?

i used to watch a lot of proko and sycra videos (on youtube), and also do gesture/figure drawings from photo references and k-pop dance practice videos.

when / why did you start drawing?

i started taking it seriously when i was 15. seeing lesbian fanart was what caused my gay awakening and i felt like there wasn't enough of it, so i decided to get better.

do you do traditional art?

i kind of dislike it, actually. i have filled over 1000 A4 sheets and 7 sketchbooks over the years, but it's all quick doodles to practise or warm up. when i bought a tablet i could carry around i stopped drawing traditionally as often, but i still find myself drawing in my sketchbook from time to time when i want to sketch midlessly or get better at something.

do you draw nsfw art?

very rarely, but i only show it to my friends. i do consume a lot of nsfw content tho, just not in public 👍

how do you keep yourself motivated?

a combination of drawing only what i like and a strong desire of seeing more lesbian art. that's why i mostly make fanart and almost never participate in art trades or make art gifts. i also don't want to make a career out of drawing.

have you gone to art school?

i have a college degree in graphic design, but it has almost no correlation with the kind of art i share online. before that i never studied art academically.

are you seriously a furry?

yes.

are you seriously a communist?

you call me a communist, socialist, leftist– i just want people to be happy and i heavily oppose capitalism on its fundamentals.

are you an anti or a pro shipper?

i am neither, i don't care about this.

are you aware that you follow someone who did something problematic?

i mostly follow other artists, so if i've been following someone problematic for a long time it probably isn't that deep for me to unfollow them.

do you have any ocs?

plenty! but i don't like to talk about them in public

can i be your friend / talk regularly with you?

i don't like to talk to strangers, but if i'm following you feel free to interact with me at any time~

what's the name of your cat?

yonyon ! she's a female cat but i treat her by any and all gendered terms

why have you disabled your DMs, story replies and sometimes comments?

because i dislike interacting with fandoms, especially big ones. i draw for myself and for the lesbians with niche interests, so i don't want to read weird comments, block overly friendly DMs or watch strangers have a public debate about my moral standards. i'm very thankful towards all of you who love my art tho, even if i can't read all of your positive thoughts!! also, there are plenty of ways to contact me, they're just not in plain sight 💋

[momochizoey]

Thank you for tagging me @celinou !!

1. How many works do you have on AO3? 

I've got 12 on my AO3! 9 ATLA/TLOK fics, and 3 Wednesday fics.

2. What's your total AO3 word count? 

46,759 words in total! Most of it is one shots so that tracks tbh, though I'm actually pretty impressed with how much that actually is, especially cause it doesn't count how much I've written for WIPs.

4. What are your top 5 fics by kudos? 

#1) Scrapped Scenes, a Wenclair fic, at 1,632 kudos (which is frankly insane, I hadn't realized it got that much)

#2) Crying Wolf, another Wenclair fic, at 759 kudos

#3) And Iphigenia Felt Rage, a Yuezula fic, at 225 kudos

#4) The Future Looks Brighter Together, a Sokkla fic, at 163 kudos

And at #5) Yours In Body And Soul, another Sokkla fic, at 154 kudos

I'm not surprised the two Wenclair fics are on top by such a wide margin, I wrote those when the show had only just come out so the fandom was at its peak. Very glad that many people liked what I wrote though! Since most of the other fandoms I've written for (on ao3 or here) are a lot less active, it was a new experience!

5. Do you respond to comments? Why or why not? 

I usually do, but I do have to admit I've been struggling a bit with it recently 😅. I read them all, and I'm so grateful for them, but especially on fics that I had huge plans for still, and which are in no way close to progressing, I have this feeling like I should have a new chapter to offer when I do answer them. I'm blaming it on my social anxiety 😬

6. What's the fic you wrote with the angstiest ending?

Ooh, that's a hard one cause I definitely tend to go in a more fluffy, feel-good direction. But I'd have to say it's Keep Your Fire On A Leash (Let The Ashes Bring You Peace). It's a June/Azula oneshot, mainly focused on Azula dealing with the pyromania she developed in captivity (as a need to reclaim complete control over at least this aspect of her life). She tries to manage it a little by working in pottery, where continuous, constant temperature control is crucial to porcelain quality, but it's not perfect. It's not angsty per-se, but it's definitely more ambiguously neutral.

7. What's the fic you wrote with the happiest ending? 

Oooh, I'd say it's a toss up between two of my fics:

The first is Not Alone, a TyZula band AU fic about Azula recovering from bottom surgery. I wrote it while I myself was still recovering from bottom surgery, and I wanted to explore a facet of trans characters journeys that isn't often discussed? It's a bit more niche, and I only recently made it open to anyone, not just ao3 users, so it's one of my less popular fics for sure, but it's very hopeful portrayal of a trans experience.

And the second is Yours In Body And Soul, a Sokkla soulmates AU, where soulmates bodyswap at night when either of them has had a bad day, in order to try to cheer them up. I got the idea from a korrasami fic called Paralyzed I read a while back, and changed the mechanics a little bit to make it work. It's definitely a more traditional happy ending, romantic getting together included (up to a point, they are still kids in the timeline so just an excited hug).

8. Do you get hate on fics? 

I don't! Sometimes people disagree on one interpretation of something, but never disrespectful or anything, so I'm pretty happy!

9. Do you write smut? 

I've tried it before in private, got some good feedback. But no, never anything that I'd share.

10. Do you write crossovers? What's the craziest one you've ever written? 

I'm not sure if ATLA/TLOK counts😂. I've had some ideas for crossovers though, and written a few draft snippets, I think it was a TLT/ATLA one, an ATLA/Shang-Chi, and a Naruto/ATLA one that I've actually posted a few snippets from on here if I remember correctly.

That last one was a Sakura reincarnated into Azula idea, to explore some interesting anti-imperialist ideals, because that's actually a blind spot Sakura has as well with Konoha. It's easy for her to fall into the same ideological fallacies as before, especially with the significantly lower usage of child soldiers in the Fire Nation making it seem like the epitome of peace and human rights to her. Like looking at the same problem in a different font, at a slightly different angle, it gives Sakura an opportunity for growth by maybe showing her some of the issues she had been ignoring or missing in Konoha, shaking some of her loyalty.

11. Have you ever had a fic stolen? 

Nope, not as far as I'm aware!

12. Have you ever had a fic translated? 

Also nope, theoretically I could translate it in Dutch, but I'm a lot better at expressing myself in English I think, and almost every Dutch person can read English (especially on ao3), so I don't think it would add much. Maybe one day though!

13. Have you ever co-written a fic before? 

I haven't, though it seems like it'd be very cool, I'd definitely be open to it!

14. What's your all time favorite ship? 

God, don't make me choose 😭😭 I guess it's probably Chasefield? I'm such a sucker for those two it's unreal. Otherwise maybe Yuezula, Maizula or Sokkla? They each have such interesting possible dynamics, in such varying ways.

15. What's a WIP you want to finish, but doubt you ever will? 

Again, that's a tough one cause I'm afraid I have a lot. I still have several half-written chapters of Getting Family Approval In Six Fool-Proof Steps (Cue The Fools, Sokka And Azula), as well as the start of a longer fic that continues on from And Iphigenia Felt Rage that I've fully outlined and would love to write someday but can't be sure I ever will. There's also Indelible Mark which I've been blocked on forever. As for WIPs that haven't even been partially published yet, I've got 11k for a Chasefield fic I've posted a scene or two for on here called Muse on My Mind, that I wish I could finish but I'm not confident I can manage any time soon. I've also got the start and the outline of a TLT griddlehark fic, where I'm absolutely in love with the premise and the twist I'm building it on, but which, again, I've not progressed much with in a good 6 months. There's a few others, but these are the ones I'd really like to finish at some point.

18. Thoughts on writing dialogue in another language for a fic? 

I love reading it, writing it I could do Dutch or Google translate a different language, but much preferably I'd be able to check it with someone who actually speaks the language for accuracy. Best to use some of the more advanced ao3 html uses to make a translation appear when you hover over it though, unless not understanding it is an important part of the reading experience, in which case people can look it up later if they want to.

19. First fandom you wrote for? 

My very first fic was actually a The 100 song fic based on an opera song, which is too embarrassing so I won't share where it is🤐 I was like 17 so it's too embarrassing.

20. Favourite fic you've ever written?

Tbh, it's either Muse on My Mind (the chasefield fic I mentioned that isn't posted anywhere except for 1 or 2 scenes on Tumblr), which is super fun because it's playing with the perspective of a character that just straight up doesn't understand half the plot happening in the background that is hinted at for the reader who does know. Oblivious characters too caught up in their own shit to pay attention are so so so much fun to write, especially when you have fun with it, implying things but never outright confirming it!

Otherwise it's Haunted By Runaway Ghosts. That one is a Sokkla fic that explores their past through flashbacks while Zuko and Katara are both grappling with the discovery of their niece and nephew they had no idea existed (or could exist). Which, not to brag, but from a technical standpoint I really think that one is probably one of the most skilled fics I've written and published, and it was so much fun to write and puzzle it all together; the slow build up and explanations slowly coming together to form the bigger picture, the hidden ties between locations in the show and events in the story and how they fit into each other perfectly - genuinely a joy to write (and if people are interested in reading it please do, imo it's on par with And Iphigenia Felt Rage, if in a pretty different style, definitely something I'd love for more people to enjoy the way I did writing it).

Thanks again for tagging me @celinou, this was very fun to do! I see you've already tagged @sourrind, who I'd have tagged as well, so next I'll tag @dawnsiren @ly0nstea and @likeadragonfruit , and of course whoever else wants to do it!

[oh-cramity-its-amity]

You have a real niche taste in music

Ah- I don't know if I would call it niche per say but rather extremely refined and self curated. A lot of it amounts to me exploring and trying to constantly expand my knowledge on artists I might not know but have heard in passing. We are fortunate to exist in the age where something like Spotify exists and is widly accessible. A way that I look for artists is mainly through vinyl hauls on YouTube, I pull up Spotify in a different tab on my phone, and whenever an album looks even remotely intriguing or like it sounds of the genres I like, I add it to the library for later.

You gotta love an album a lot if your gonna spend money on a new vinyl; unfortunately the prices are godawful to buy multiple albums at one time but seeing someone talk about their vinyl collection and haul is something that I go to for recommendations. Album artwork is a good factor too! If it looks cool then why not, Spotify being so accessible makes the barrier of entry to consume an album almost without effort. If you listen to the album later and its not your jam then it too is a learning experience. Maybe that album didnt register for you at that time too, theres some albums I come back to months after a first listen that click and I enjoy. You gotta really have an open mind and not be afraid to discover something different thats out of your comfort realm. Its extremely fun for me, especially too when a friend or someone in passing mentions an album or song. Chances are even if I'm not engaging with you at the time and I see the post I'll pull my Spotify up and add it to my library. I'm always interested in figuring out what there is that's out there.

Obviously you dont ever have to approach music this way, if you are someone who only wants to listen to one or two artists then thats cool!!! Music is subjective and its something your supposed to enjoy as a whole. If it makes you feel good and happy then thats what matters.

Too- I find that sometimes an artist wont always click and sometimes its just the album itself. Not all artists have good albums, you dont need to consume all of an artist's catalog to "be a fan" you can just like one album by them. That's some of what I do. I try an album, like it, move on. But the trick is to try to figure out your favorite genres as well and find artists that fit within them or people who like those artists but also additional artists.

So- Examples of this is I like Phoebe Bridgers, yeah? Well this girl I watched mentioned Radiohead - Which is kind of not toward the same genres at all but you get the point. She liked Radiohead so I decided "Well maybe I should try to see what this album sounds like" and at first Radiohead was HARD to get into. Super slow for my taste, but a different youtuber said that In Rainbows was her favorite album, so I tried that one. And guess what? It clicked. I love In Rainbows. Then I went back to Ok Computer and it made sense. You just gotta approach it all with an open mind and not be afraid of trying something you might not like in the end, in every case its always a learning experience to help you refine your taste better!!! Also albums too sometimes need relistening for you to get a better feel for them. I can go on and on about music but I will leave it here. My taste is niche if you say it is anon, but I just know what I like lol

[panzerprincess33]

yes! xx a fic i really like is snow angel and how the three (hh, jg, ah) all are attracted to the mc. it definitely made me interested in that dynamic and how would you think they’d act if they were very in-love, (obsessed, even), with a mc who didn’t notice? since himmler was a bit of a people-pleaser i think he’d be try to make mc happy and try to demonstrate how capable he is, or something of that nature.

your himmler fics feel so real, so i can see that 100%. goebbels is such a complex guy, i feel like he’s hard to capture in writing but you do that very well, in clean that is definitely how he’d act towards a maid he liked. i think fics about more niche guys would be fun and different, and would make its own audience if there wasn’t already one.

at times i’m like, i wish there was more information about these guys and their personal lives. like, what was himmlers favorite music genre, or favorite color? what was goebbles favorite season? but when i write little short stories about them the mystery kinda pushes creativity it’s interesting that way, imo! it makes head-canons feel more original, cause everyone has a different interpretation of them and what they did.

one more thing, lol, sorry to keep writing thru anon asks! at first i was a bit nervous to send in an ask but I didn’t wanna pass up the chance to say something, cause before i had no idea about reichblr/fandom and just read a03 about them (specifically your stories). anyway, my day was good, and i hope yours is great! xx

Aw yeah I’m always happy to answer anything or chat! And yeah, I think your perceptions of them are also bang on. The dynamics in snow angel would be super fun to get more into for sure, maybe in a more developed story.

I'm really happy to hear you found the stories on Ao3! I remember when I wrote them and posted about the I felt like I was shouting into the void, that no one else really feels this way, but I was so pleasantly surprised that people actually cared and read the works! I agree with you about the headcanons, reading the different interpretations people have about them is all the more interesting. It's as though you can create a patchwork of their character, taking what resonates with you from each work you read. And yes, it would be awesome to know little intimate details, simple things about them, that are overlooked or never mentioned in history texts.

I think it's because it's so taboo to express any attraction towards these men, which makes sense, given how the war ended, and all those events in between. That being said, I don't think desire for men is evil, I don't think attraction to men is evil, for healthy young women :) There's a lot more nuance that I think I have, and maybe you can relate to, rather than just expression attraction to these guys for the purpose of being "edgy" or attention-seeking. Like, it's more complex than that.

Honestly, I think if anything, it kind of goes to show how you can't choose your attraction/interest in things, that they choose you. What you can control, is how you deal with it. I think writing and sometimes drawing about it helps me a ton.

Anyway, it means the world to me to hear you like the stories :))

[munson-blurbs]

I say this with so much love and respect but your post about engagement being down has garnered more notes and interaction for you already than I would normally get on a fic spanning anywhere from 5k - 20k words. Your interpretation of interactions being down when your last, very niche creation got 200 notes is astounding to me. I understand that it can be really hard sometimes to see a dip in numbers and it makes you wonder what you've done wrong as an author. But I promise you it is nothing personal and that you do not need to change anything. I do think though that it is worth reflecting a little on the fact that you are still so lucky to receive the number of notes you do on most works. Often I see you get more asks about your fics and people asking for updates than I do readers in general. I understand that I must sound bitter and I am sorry for that. It's hard to see people asking what they should change about themselves and their work because interaction is down when it is still numbers I would kill for and makes me wonder what exactly is wrong with my own work to have so little people care about it in the first place. I'm sorry you're feeling this way too.

Hi, anon!

First of all, your ask doesn't sound bitter at all. You're absolutely right in saying that I'm lucky to receive the engagement and interaction that I have, especially at a time when overall engagement is low.

For me, the drop-off in interest on my work compared to my previous fics is disheartening. I'm comparing current fics like Living After Midnight to Trapped Under Ice. And I'm not even referring to note count; more so talking about comments and even asks with people's reactions and questions they have about characters/plot/etc.

I write what makes me happy (or sad, depending on what emotions I need to process), but I also want to make sure that people are enjoying what I post. The lowered engagement compared to my older fics had me wondering if there was something I was missing that people wanted to read. I appreciate you giving me some perspective on that.

All that being said, I do try to make sure I read/reblog fics that haven't garnered as much traction in addition to fics written by my longtime fandom friends, so if you send me a DM, I'd be happy to read your work!

[diaphin93]

Your musings reminded me of my own thoughts about fe3h fandom in general and w.r.t. Edie, and it is such a weird beast… It makes for an uneasy neighborhood. On one hand, it's hard to find anything pro-Edelgard that doesn't have a token "her decisions are so stupid" comment. On the other, the analysis arms-race between subfandoms resulted in some of the most intricate and interesting media analyses I've ever seen haha, including literature and film

On one hand, you can find extreeeemely well done character studies exploring personhood, bodily autonomy, nature of authority — all incredible themes. Both popular and very niche. Some genuinely superbly written, and some more amature-ish but still sporting cool ideas. And somehow, this cohabits one ao3 tag with horrific humiliation-torture-porn of a too-radical woman. Brr, I steel sometimes think about it (and the existence of AG) and can barely avoid getting miserably triggered. I think that one time you spoke about historical treatment of transgressive ladies you hit the nail on the head.

[On a side note, 3Hopes is such a funny game. Heroic Edelgard w/ Claude in SB and GW enraged all the anti-Edelgard people, and AG is an atrocity to anyone who is pro-Edelgard and/or is remotely feminist. Imho, I could be wrong, of course, I'd love to be wrong, but that's the strong impression I got from my limited information]

I think I would've been more able to enjoy Dimitri and Claude, if none of their fans espoused deeply disturbing sexual assault jokes targeting a fictional abuse survivor… Ok fine I think I still wouldn't be fine with Dimitri and his whole "let's dismember that woman and make a spectacle out of it" spiel, but maybe it would be easier for me to not read it as misogyny if it wasn't weaponized by misogynists…

Sorry for the rant with some troubling topics! :( I figured you kinda enjoyed engaging with them, so I hope that's no bother

Hi. No worries, it doesn't bother me and I'm sorry that many aspects of the community have a triggering and uncomfortable effect to you. I'm always happy to reply here.

Personally I must say, on one hand the fact that Discourse is so heated and active even 5 years after the games release is on one hand testiment to the games success at deeply resonating with people and making the choice of horde and which side to fight the war on impactful and important.

On the other hand, it lead to a massive moral panic because alot of people simply can't handle a morally grey and nuanced female Antagonist/Protagonist or a game that lets you play opposing factions. I can't imagine how bad many people in the FE3H Fandom would have been in World of Warcraft back when everyone was obsessed with the Faction System. Not leaving myself out, especialy last year where I, admittedly, really went down the deep end due to personal reasons.

Though I will say, I also dislike the narrative of Edelgard just doing nothing wrong and being a flawless pure morally good character on our side of discourse. I get it, I went there too because Discourse got so heated and the sheer volume and intensityof the poison and outright misogyny many people on the Edelcrit side of things spill and I projected alot of it, unfairly, on Dimitri myself. Sometimes I still do, though I try to be more reasonable and remind myself of the fact, that similarily to Edelgard, Dimitri is for many people a comfort character whose narrative, trauma and personal development deeply resonates with them, and I really don't want to ruin that for the people who can at least respect and acknowledge the reasons why many people, especially queer women, feel drawn to Dimitri. I mean, I once convinced a person to be more open towards Edelgard but unevitably embittered them to Dimitri and thinking back on it, it kinda felt shitty. Sure, I want people to be more appreciative and less bashful towards Edelgard, but I think I don't really want them to in turn loss enjoyment of a character that before resonated strongly with them, because thats just not a nice thing to do.

Personally, I would actually love to play Azure Moon through the eyes of a Dimitri Fan, as it is clear, that for many people the writing, themes and emotions of this story were clearly very powerful, I just can't really enjoy the route that much and don't get emotionally invested into it, it is just not for me. And the discourse probably made it even worse over time, when originally, playing CF as my first route, I was hella excited to to play Dimitris route immediately afterwards, because he seemed like such a fascinating character and I've heard so much good about it. Maybe I should return to it nowadays and look at it with different expectations and a reopened mind.

I mean, I think really the most weird and problematic people are the church fans in my opinion. Not even for liking the church cast, outside of Gilbert, whoever likes him is yikes, but for this insistance of everything it doing being this bastion of moral righteousness and absolutely correct, when the games entire story is about how its not.

But yeah, probably less of an answer, but I saw it as a good opportunity to just talk about some things that are on my mind as of late.

[thecoolerliauditore]

hey, hey, hello.

I'm not actually following you, because I think seeing some of your takes on the life series in the middle of my dash in the broad daylight would probably make me combust. but when the mood strikes right, your blog is one of the most entertaining and interesting things i've seen. I admire your analysis posts and I think you have a very interesting (and sometimes even a bit eye-opening) perspective. I don't agree with like half of your opinions, but hey, it is nice to see people having different opinions in a fandom (it is the beauty of any fandom really, at least for me).

So, yeah, very cool blog indeed.

I know, it's a bit of weird ask, but I just wanted to tell you that I really appreciate your blog. (sorry, if I made some things sound weird, my english is a bit rusty)

yes i agree!! The fandom ecosystem or. whatever. I think more differing interpretations and opinions is good for this sort of environment and keeps things interesting.

i see a lot of negativity towards this or that overrated design trope/interpretation/so on these days which then get met with confusion from the ppl who originated them because they have no idea or intended for their version of the story/characters to dominate and that kinda sucks for everyone involved. i think more ppl being genuine abt their interpretations however niche or disagreeable is how you get a more happy fandom overall and less people feeling like they're the only one in the world who sees a certain character or moment in a specific way.

also i don't actually know why anyone at all follows this blog so like shrugs. I actively warned ppl not to follow it at first cus it really is just like. the equivalent of me having a priv twitter but with no character limit. whatever tho thankyou for the kind words!

[nyarlathotep-thecrawlingchaos]

Get to Know the Unknowable!!

14 DEC 2023 Lest I ever forget this momentous day

Hey so I found a list of weird unambiguous questions so we're doing a get-to-know-the-blogger thing for shits and giggles, which I guess I'll link in my masterlist or something.

Gonna include some blog-driven questions first and then just delve straight into what-the-actual-fuck territory.

Here we goooooooooooo

Fandoms?

One Piece Live Action is the only one I'm actively writing right now, largely for my own sanity. Fandoms I also write for include One Piece anime/manga (of course, though I'm painfully behind), Death Note, Harry Potter, Supernatural, Seven Deadly Sins anime, Durarara!, Chrono Trigger/Chrono Cross, and maybe some others I might remember and add later or something. Feel free to make a random ask request for literally anything listed, there's a chance I might end up responding to it. But OPLA is my hyperfixation at the moment, with a little spice added here and there from manga. I make my own canon, don't like it then sail on.

Genres?

Oh fuck me up, I will write any genre. My original work is primarily horror, sometimes with a touch or fantasy or science fiction, almost always with a splash of crime. Fanfiction often revolves around romance, but if you want something niche, DEAR GODS TELL ME I WANT TO PARTAKE especially if it's horror please ask me to write horror

Reply time to ask requests?

My life is very chaotic right now, and thus therefore also is my reply time. Do not get disheartened if I write a few headcanons and/or a one-shot or two before I get to your request. Writing is very much a coping mechanism for me, so I write what I feel. That does NOT mean I'm not interested in your request, it just means that I want to make sure I'm in the right mindset to do it justice because I love you people and the fact that you like the shit I'm shoveling makes me so unreasonably happy.

Are you really an ageless unknowable horror?

Yes. We get into fandoms, too. Eternity gets fucking boring okay don't judge. Especially when your bff has been napping for LITERAL CENTURIES WOULD YOU WAKE UP ALREADY YOU TENTACLED DIPSHIT I'M STARTING TO RELATE TO THESE MORTALS AND IT'S UNCOMFORTABLE

What is the most ridiculous nightmare you have ever had?

Actually I wrote a whole ass horror story about it, which I might share here someday. So there was this epidemic of huge windstorms one night that knocked out the power in a handful of small towns around the world. Then the next day there were these weird little black rocks, oval shaped, about an two inches long and one inch wide. Smooth like river rocks with a white line running through them, just scattered around the towns here and there. Not super noticeable, not tons of them, but just enough that they looked out of place. If one came in contact with your skin, e.g. you picked one up or kicked one up into your shoe, you'd get this weird little pinprick of pain just behind your left shoulder. Three nights later, at precisely 2:43 in the morning (nonidea why, but it was 2:43, Inwill never forget that), you hear footsteps. Quick footsteps, small footsteps, coming toward wherever you happen to be, and then you're asleep. Then you wake up the next missing a limb or an organ, no signs of any injury or surgery or anything, just like it was never there to begin with (and obviously if itbwas a major organ then you never woke up again at all). There was a lot more detail, the dream was like living in some weird sci-fi horror movie, and it was so vivid that when I woke up from it I literally sat up and jerked away all my covers to make sure I still had all my limbs.

Tell us an embarrassing story.

Seventh grade. Close to the end of the school year. Was reading a book (I think it was The Shining), had one of my ankles crossed over my other knee, didn't realize I was somehow pinching a nerve. Had to stand up at end of class period, and one of my legs had gone completely numb. I stood, took one step, went down like a sack of bricks. The group of boys who used to bully me were all in the class and spent at least a month mocking the spectacle. Still think about that sometimes.

Explain an inside joke you have with a friend or family member.

Any time hubs and I go out together for any reason, one of us inevitably does Rick Sanchez voice "And awwwAAAAAyyy we gooo" before we leave the driveway. No idea how this started. No idea when it will end. I have a feeling we'll still be doing this into our 80s with no idea why.

Tell me your life story in exactly one sentence.

"Oh no, not again."

What is the strangest coincidence that ever happened to you?

Went to the beach when I was seventeen. Was sitting out on the boardwalk playing guitar by myself because toxic family members were doing nothing but argue and fight in our hotel room, I literally just walked out and no one noticed for hours. Was super peaceful. Got into a conversation with two strangers who had just met each other as well and were hanging out, two kind elderly men. As we were talking, I found out that one of them was from my very small hometown in New York and had moved to the beach recently; and the other was from the very small town I lived in at that present time in South Carolina, and had recently moved to the beach. Both of them had moved there at around the same time. I still think about that a lot.

What is your favorite random fact?

Pineapple eats you while you eat it.

What is your useless talent?

I can bend the top joint of all of my fingers without bending the second joint, a la Sith Force Lightning. Arguably it makes me better at music, but I've never had to bend my fingers like that playing guitar, so I disagree.

What is the strangest food combination you enjoy?

I literally have no idea. I'm a tremendous foodie and "strange" is relative when you're willing to eat literally anything put in front of you at least one time just to experience it.

What would you name your heavy metal band?

Plastic Peanutbutter

If you could choose one superpower, what would it be?

Invisibility, so people would like just leave me alone seriously I'm antisocial as shit just give me peace and quiet (not internet people, you guys are cool af)

What is your strangest irrational fear?

Gamma Ray Bursts. Do yourself a favor amd don't Google it. I spent literally two years of middle school fucking petrified of that shit. It still gets under my skin if I think about it too long now.

Describe your most eccentric family member.

It me! 😁 or maybe my niece, but she's basically my personality twin so either way.

Have you ever met a celebrity? Which celebrity would you like to meet?

Nope. But I really would love to have coffee with Stephen King and just talk about life. His On Writing memoir changed everything I thought about writing, taught me that imposter syndrome was a thing, and that even the most talented and successful artists have it. Really I just want to thank him.

What is the craziest thing you ever did on a dare?

Got a tattoo. It's a skeleton key, on the outer side of my right thigh. I have another, but I got that one on a dare. Basically just because why not, and I literally forget it's there sometimes and sort of jump when I notice it.

What is the grossest thing you would do for $100?

Probably eat something super weird. Will literally try anything once, food-wise. In fact I'll usually try it twice, just to be sure.

What songs are on the soundtrack to your life?

Don't ask me that, we'll be here all goddamned year. A few right off hand though are "Doesn't Remind Me" by Audioslave, "This Train Don't Stop There Anymore" by Elton John, "What it's Like" by Everlast, "Gone Away" by The Offspring, and "Vienna" by Billy Joel. I'm also unreasonably hyperfixated on The Fratellis right now because I suddenly remembered they existed a few months ago after more than ten years not hearing them at all and now I know almost their entire discography by heart. They're my feel-good band right now and pretty much all I'm listening to. Yes, there definitely is something wrong with me.

What actor would you choose to play you in your biopic?

Samuel L. Jackson. My life requires hefty use of the word "motherfucker." He might need a wig or two but I think he can handle it.

What is your go-to karaoke song?

I've never karaoked, but probably something from Chris Cornell, Ella Fitzgerald, Jewel, or Fleetwood Mac. Or "American Pie" by Don McLean.

If you were a superhero, who would be your archnemesis?

Probably myself rofl kinda don't like me very much

Create and describe an undercover alias.

Fancy black bowler hat, and a pair of those joke glasses with an attached giant nose and mustache. But like, be completely and totally serious about it, to the point that people are afraid to question you.

What is your most random impulse buy?

Death Note manga, complete box set. I was seventeen. I had money. Many years later and I do not regret it at all and it sits very close to my bedside.

What did you do as a teenager that makes you cringe now?

Let bullying bother me.

What would your warning label say?

"CONTENTS HIGHLY UNSTABLE, DO NOT TOUCH MIGHT TAKE OVER THE KNOWN UNIVERSE ON CONTACT or possibly cry hard to tell"

What is your guilty pleasure?

I don't think I have one. If it brings you happiness, don't waste your time being guilty about it. Just enjoy it and kick anyone who makes fun of you for it directly in the shin-bone. Actually don't do that just ignore them I'm not into violence.

What emoji do you use most often?

Combination of 🙄😒 to signify eyerolling.

Does your family practice any unusual practices?

Does emotional unavailability count asking for a friend

A genie grants you the ability to have infinite amounts of one item. What is it?

Guitar strings. Please. Dear sweet fuck PLEASE

What is your favorite joke?

A big moron and a little moron sit on a bridge. Which one falls off?

The big moron. Because the other one was a little more on.

Aaaaaahahaha

What is the best Halloween costume you ever wore?

Pirate. Always. I have so many clothes tucked in my closet and jewelry hidden away that are strictly there for the sole purpose of putting together an impromptu pirate costume it's honestly kind of sad honestly

What is the most awkward situation you ever found yourself in?

My very very religious mother-in-law noticing that I have a tattoo on my forearm...after SEVEN YEARS. Awkward af, but it was also hilarious.

What is the most ridiculous thing you believed as a child?

My older brother once told me when I was very young that vehicles move by rolling over and over end to end so fast that you don't know it's happening, and crashes happen when they hit a rock or a crack in the road the wrong way. I spent TWO YEARS secretly terrified of getting in a car before finally asking my mom about it and she just sort of sighed and said "oh god please stop listening to your brother"

What is the most outrageous lie you told a child?

I don't know Santa or something? I've got a ton of nieces and nephews. I try not to lie to kids, apart from letting them think magic exists for as long as possible, because everyone deserves to believe that.

What is the dumbest way you injured yourself?

Broke my pinky toe, because my dog got under my foot and I didn't want to step on her paw by accident so I jerked the wrong way

How do you waste time most often?

Probably napping. But given I have trouble sleeping at night that's sorta necessary or something I guess.