#sometimes i read a gm from hell story and im like honestly you guys are lucky your gm didnt shoot you with a real gun for that

[elftwink]

my toxic trait is that i can't listen to those "GM/DM from hell" ttrpg horror stories because i almost always agree with the GM even if they're being extremely unreasonable because at least 80% of the time it's immediately obvious that the entire table is trash and the GM put up with it for a saintly amount of time before snapping and now the players have to crawl to reddit to be validated, where they will be validated because any GM who wont take a bullet for their players and then suck their dick is lazy and selfish, obviously!!

for example one "unreasonable" rule ive seen floating around abt dnd is "you have to act out all charisma checks" and look. i am aware at least some DMs with this rule are trying to be the next Matt Mercer and want you to play the part of the next Sam Riegel, damn your comfort and either of your skill levels and capabilities. this should obviously be addressed with exactly what the DM expects and why; after all, they don't make you do a backflip for an acrobatics check

BUT. but. imagine, if you will. you're the DM. your players come to a tavern. you describe a bunch of NPCs and wait for players to instigate roleplay. one of them rolls a die without asking you and then says "I want to seduce the innkeeper. I rolled an 18"

"ok," you say, (even though they should have just said what they did and waited for you to ask them for a skill check) because you're a good DM and you roll with the punches, "cool. what do you say to her?"

"uhm. I rolled an 18."

"ok yeah but what do you say. like what happens. what do you want the outcome to be"

"im seducing her. I rolled to seduce. I got 18"

"okay I know— you know seduction is not a skill right? whatever. what happens?"

"I dunno, you're the DM. I rolled an 18 though"

you now have a couple choices. you can continue trying to coax this player into roleplay, and risk the table think you are denying them the success of the roll (a roll you didnt even ask them to make), or you can sigh and say "okay fine. you seduce the innkeeper. you retreat to your quarters after dinner" even though this isn't fun for you and is barely fun for anyone else, including the player in question who stopped caring about the specifics the second they saw a high roll.

NOW imagine this happens several times a session, at least.

this is a fairly common occurrence at most tables, mostly due to lack of skill and comfort with roleplay, but it can happen to anyone who just isnt feeling 100% that day for any reason. im extremely fortunate to have DMed at tables where prompts like "and what do you say" actually do kick-start roleplay, and when it doesn't we're all comfortable enough to take a pause and try to figure out what we want from the scene, if anything. some sessions may be full on dialogue and others just quick narration depending on what the party wants to focus on and if they feel like getting into roleplay that day. & because I know what my players want, it's way easier to nudge them in that direction, and I don't get any resistance because we understand we share a common goal.

but if this were to happen at my table frequently when I was less experienced, with players who internalize the players vs DM antagonism rife in so many dnd spaces, where my attempts to direct the game were belittled or ignored but also where every single player had to be fucking micromanaged in order to keep the game rolling... i also might deal with this by putting my foot down and saying "if you don't roleplay a charisma check, you do not get to make a roll". to me this is not rules tyranny. this is a desperate attempt to get players to actually play the fucking game with you rather than chat and fuck around at your expense, wasting your time and all the time you spent prepping. & that is why, your Honor, my client pleads NOT GUILTY!!! and furthermore the defense would like to state that this whole case is projection on the part of the plaintiffs and should have been thrown out long before getting to court.

(i will say. if you're a DM and you find yourself making extremely specific, borderline unreasonable house rules to deal with your party's antics, especially if the impact is to just make them use the RAW, you need to find a new table. yes even if you're friends. doubly so actually. your friendship will survive you quitting DMing for them. it may not survive the blowout fight you'll end up having if you continue trying to pretend that shit doesn't bother you.)