#sometimes I write things

[emlovessid]

@jegulus-microfic april 25, headlights, 217 words, nsfw

“Ow,” James whines.

“Stop being a baby,” Regulus teases, continuing to try to untangle James’ glasses from his hair, which has worked itself into a knot around one of the nose pads.

James sighs, stepping closer into the gap between Regulus’ legs where he’s sitting on the edge of the bathroom counter, hands settling on Regulus’ hips. He presses a kiss to James’ forehead before continuing, humming under his breath.

“What are you doing?”

Regulus looks up over James’ shoulder to find Sirius leant against the bathroom door, smirk on his lips.

“James’ glasses are tangled in his hair.”

“How the hell did you manage that, mate?” Sirius says with a laugh, and James’ head immediately snaps up and meets Regulus’ eyes like a deer caught in headlights.

He can feel the heat in cheeks but struggles to hold back his smile as he thinks back to the sight of James between his thighs, glasses pushed up onto his head as he licked through his folds. So maybe Regulus had something to do with this predicament they’re in now, with the way his hands grasped desperately at James’ hair as he fell over the edge.

His face must give something away because Regulus is brought back to reality by Sirius groaning, “Oh god, please forget I asked.”

[luminousalicorn]

New short story. Fantasy, < 3,600 words.

[whoopssteddiefeels]

Penny in the Air

Robin is a lot of things: judgey, hyperactive, anxious, impulsive, talkative, loud- there’s a list okay, and she’s very familiar with it. High up the list is that she is very, very gay (if possible, she’s pretty sure she’s actually getting gayer. She blames Steve for this, as she’s pretty sure it has to do with being able to finally talk about her crushes to someone other than her reflection.)

The point is, she’s gay, so she’s not surprised that she notices first. The Steve-Eddie thing. Because it is, in fact, a thing at this point.

She knows Eddie is gay- knows it like the sky is blue and David Bowie rocks- because of, y’know, the way he is (if she had any doubt, the way he leaned in while calling Steve “big boy”, ew, killed it dead.) Her research suggests this is “gaydar,” but its very unfair, she thinks, that so far it has only detected exactly (2) gays, both men, making it pretty much useless. It has given her exactly 0 information on Vickie.

She empathizes with Eddie’s position. Feels it pang under her sternum when his eyes go soft watching Steve talk emphatically, hair flopping around in that ridiculous way it does. Knows how it must catch in his throat when his hand suddenly retracts halfway to Steve’s shoulder, going to his own hair to cover the aborted movement. Tries hard to not over-identify with the sharp tug he gives there, trying to snap himself out of it (fails because she did literally exactly that when Vickie was in the video store the previous day, almost as if he had seen and copied the mechanism).

The part of the puzzle she can’t figure out is Steve. She’s annoyingly aware that he likes (groan) boobies, thanks Fast Times, and he isn’t treating Eddie like a girl whose number he’s trying to score. That being said, whenever the older boy appears, Steve lights up like a damn Christmas tree. Affection doesn’t have to be romantic; she knows this- wants to hit several of the kiddos over the head with it whenever they allude to her dating Steve- but empathy for Eddie is tinting her judgement, and once you put on the gay rose-tinted glasses it’s hard to unsee the possibility. It certainly seems like flirting. Rearranging his hair every three seconds, drawing Eddie’s eyes to the mane that is his pride and joy. Getting what she can only describe as unnecessarily close when he squeezes by Eddie in the video store aisles or whoever’s living room they’re sprawled in, hands brushing a shoulder, back, or one time his hip under the pretense of maintaining balance. The soft blush whenever Eddie flirts hard in a way he knows can be passed off as a joke. The honest megawatt smile Steve gets whenever Eddie starts in on his usual antics is infinitely more endearing than the smolder he’s learned to use like a weapon.

She usually knows exactly what Steve is thinking or feeling before he does. They’ve got that whole platonic soul mate telepathy thing, and he’s easily the center of her social world. So, since she can’t tell what he’s thinking (other than the obvious but unhelpful “Eddie, yay!”), she’s 99.9% sure, from experience, ok, that it means he isn’t thinking. Like at all. So, what she’s witnessing is instinctive, his body just moving into Eddie’s space because it feels correct, and he hasn’t paused to think about it.

             He’s walking that line of comfortable and affectionate that is ambiguously intimate. Could be platonic, could be more. It would be frustrating for anyone with a crush, but she knows from bitter experience with straight-girl crushes that Eddie must be going insane. And yes, Robin and Eddie are friends, but not close enough for her to open a conversation with “So you’re obviously gay and into Steve, my best friend who I talk to every second of every day, and no he hasn’t mentioned it, and neither have I. What’s up with that?” Similarly, she can’t quite figure out how to bring it up to Steve without accidentally outing Eddie in the process.

That’s the main reason she’s keeping her mouth uncharacteristically shut on the subject. She is not, however, above the occasional raised eyebrow, ok, especially as Eddie’s flirting slowly becomes ridiculously obvious. The man is literally leaning on the counter, chin on his hand, mooning up at Steve through his eyelashes. Steve has his hip propped on the opposite side, leaning into the shared space. How are either of them this oblivious, seriously.

~*~

She’s there when the penny finally drops.

They’re not even watching a romantic movie, it’s fucking Life of Brian, all three of them calling out their favorite lines along with the actors, throwing things and generally goofing off. If she takes the armchair to force the boys together on the couch, she doesn’t think anyone can blame her. If she’s feeling a little smug that they both sit in the middle, right next to each other, instead of taking opposite ends, she keeps it to herself. She might not want to stick her foot right in the middle of that mess, but she’s not above setting booby traps.

Robin couldn’t tell you exactly when Steve’s arm went around Eddie’s shoulder; it was somewhere between Eddie practically climbing into Steve’s lap for a “Biggus Dickus” re-enactment, the closeness and flirting safely enveloped in humor, and Steve attempting to force Eddie to “haggle” for the bag of chips. When she glances over from the safety of her armchair, Steve’s arm is trapped behind Eddie’s head, draped over his shoulder on the opposite side. Eddie, usually a constant ball of fidgety motion, is frozen stiff like he’s trying not to scare off a nervous rabbit. Even in the blue light coming off the screen she can see the flush coloring his usually nocturnal-pale cheeks.

The thing is, Steve had just discussed this move with her. Told her to invite Vickie to movie night, recommended light, easily joked off roughhousing and settling an arm around her in a way specifically gaged to judge the reaction. Which means he knows. No way he hasn’t finally figured out what his lizard brain has clearly been screaming for months (seriously, she deserves a medal. Someone tell her future girlfriends about her stamina), not with the way he’s twirling a soft brown curl around and around his finger. He must know Eddie can feel that. And oh. Steve is not-so-subtly glancing to his right, trying to gage that reaction like they discussed, to see if this is ok.

Yup. Robin needs to be literally anywhere else. She tries to be subtle (insert laugh here), muttering “bathroom” and legging it out of the room, seeking the safety of the kitchen. She wasn’t worried though- odds are she could start playing trumpet and those two wouldn’t hear it past the tension of the moment.

 ~*~

In addition to gay, Robin is also easily bored. She hums along to “Always look on the bright side of life,” drifting in from the living room, crunching on some peppery crackers she found in a cabinet in a way that vaguely matches the song’s rhythm. She would just leave the boys to whatever they were going to do (yuck, don’t think about it), but unfortunately the two people most likely to give her a ride home were occupied (seriously, no thinking about it). She’d held out for as long as she could, really, but if the movie was ending, surely she had given them enough time?

Hoping she wasn’t going to regret it, she peaked out of the kitchen, and was relieved to see that 1) everyone still had clothes on and 2) Steve and Eddie were cuddling. Fucking finally.

“SO, BOYS,” she boomed (remember loud is on the list of things she is), trying not to enjoy the way two ridiculous heads of hair jumped and then shifted away from one another anxiously. “Who finally lost the longest game of gay chicken I’ve ever seen?”

Steve’s head makes an audible thump as it drops against the back of the couch, hands coming up to rub at his face as she rounds the furniture to face them, feeling deliciously smug. Eddie gave up any pretense and buried his face in Steve’s shoulder, sweater and hair completely hiding his face.

“Shut up Robin, go away,” Steve groans.

“Nope! This has been the slowest burn of all time, you guys were killing me. I have to balance it out by being just as insufferable.” she chirped, doing her best Steve impression, hands on her hips and eyebrow quirked.

“Technically, I would say we both won gay chicken since neither of us pulled back. No chickens here. Roosters only, in fact.” Eddie surfaces with a smug little smile, dimples on full display.

“Oh you’re definitely a cock Munson, I’ll give you that,”

“Don’t make me flip you the bird-”

“That’s a bit of ostritch-”

“Well toucan play at that game-”

“I’m so happy I like tits-“

“Why me?” Steve grumbled at the same time Eddie dropped his teasing tone to ask, “Wait what?”

“Me? Lesbian. You? Obviously gay. Steve has been flirting back at you for months you dingus.”

“I’ve been what?” Steve sits up straight, suddenly laser focused on Robin. “I have not. I only realized, like, a week ago-”

He was seriously going to be the death of her.

“Steve. Stephen. My guy. What would you say if I told you a girl had been giving me a hair show, the unnecessary squeeze-by, and big eyes? Consistently. For weeks.”

Eddie starts laughing. Then cackling. Steve went an even deeper shade of red, though she could tell this one was more indignant ruby than embarrassed scarlet.

“Thank you,” Eddie wheezed out, fighting down another fit, picking himself up from where he had slid down the couch. “Oh my god, thank you for fucking noticing that. He was wasn’t he? I thought it was just in my head, y’know, and Gareth always said I tend to imagine signs that aren’t there.”

“Oh I know, you think you have a hard time, girls are so physically affectionate platonically, it’s impossible to tell-”

“Ok. Done with this conversation!” Steve interrupted, standing up between the two of them, hands furiously combing through his hair.

Robin only grinned wider at Eddie. “So, Munson, care to give me a ride home?”

“You know, Buckley, I would be delighted.”

“Hey now-” Steve tried to interject as the two of them moved towards the door.

“Why thank you, kind sir.”

“Don’t mention it, fair lady. Your chariot awaits.”

“Wait, hang on, Eddie-” Steve’s tone shifted from confused to plaintive as she stepped out into the night. And she resolutely pretended to not hear Eddie’s reply before he closed the door behind them.

“Sit tight, big boy, I’ll be right back!”

[bodhimcbodeface]

I wrote a song!

The chords are an approximation; I found a four-chord loop on an app I don't really know how to use.

Anyway, here's wonderwall (no it's a song about OCD sorry)

lyrics:

I got your message at quarter to four in the morning I’d been trying to keep you away since dawn Cause if you knew what was crawling its way through my brain You’d want me gone as bad as I did. But I was tired of them dancing in front of my eyelids So I told you a little, only what you knew  You told me I wasn’t going insane. I said, “I guess that means I’ve got no excuses left.”

Breathe out, Breathe in, Try to drown in cleaner water.

And it wasn’t the worms in my head But that I liked the way they slithered and I thought of them in bed And it wasn’t the dirt on my hands but the scalpel I used to clean out under my fingernails. I got tired of them swimming upstream through my veins. I got mad they wouldn’t open me up and bleed me dry  You told me that I wasn’t going insane. I said “Please god, let me call it any other name.”

Breathe out, Breathe in Try to drown in cleaner water.

When you knocked on my door it was almost dawn And your fingers were candy cane colors from the cold I was sure when you pushed your breath into my lungs I’d reject it like a transplant And I’d already done wrong just by leaving you a handprint Stubborn like blood on your favorite jeans When you said you were scared I was going insane, I said, “I just want to…

“Breathe out, Breathe in, Try to drown in cleaner water.”

[mourningliliesmorningglories]

hey i'm ash - pls accept this handy navigation tool

song fics aka the 'i couldn't stop thinking of them and this song' series

hot & heavy - jegulus

waiting room - unrequited jegulus / jily

bruno is orange - wolfstar

seven - drarry

line without a hook - wolfstar

view between villages - remus lupin (wolfstar)

my tears ricochet - sirius & regulus

please stay - jegulus

blowing smoke - jegulus

other micro fics

you (don’t) know how it feels - rosekiller

scary? my god you’re divine - nsfw wolfstar

do you know? (Who you are?) - drarry

but you (shall be mine) - regulus & sirius

in conversation, an excerpt: Draco Malfoy

ao3

HD Tarot Fest: Towers of glory and the hands that felled them

posts | masterlist

Fic rec 1

Fic rec 2

playlists

i couldn't stop thinking of them and this song

marauders summer special

save a horse, ride a cowboy

substack - tabula rasa

[corey-writes-stuff]

Chapters: 10/? Fandom: Harry Potter - J. K. Rowling Rating: Not Rated Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply Relationships: rosestarkillerchaser - Relationship, Regulus Black/Barty Crouch Jr./James Potter/Evan Rosier Characters: Regulus Black, Barty Crouch Jr., James Potter, Evan Rosier, Other(s) Additional Tags: Background Relationships, Background Wolfstar, Nobody is Dead, Everyone Is Gay, Fake/Pretend Relationship, Regulus Black & Sirius Black Have a Good Relationship, I'm Bad At Tagging, Other Additional Tags to Be Added, Other Ships Not Mentioned in Tags, Constructive Criticism Welcome, Please leave criticism, Love Confessions, fast burn, Declarations Of Love, Not Actually Unrequited Love, Background Pandalily - Freeform, Polyamory, Tags Are Hard Summary:

Basically, all of Hogwarts thinks Barty, Evan, Regulus, and James are dating. So, they decide to prank the school and fake date. But how long does it stay fake? Where is the line between just putting on a show and actually enjoying the kisses?

[ladymalchav]

I don't write for the weewoo fandom, but I just got gobsmacked with the image of Buck showing Tommy a tattoo of Tommy's name on Buck's hip.

Tommy says that's too much. They're not even married, not even engaged! and Buck's says something like 'We may not be forever, but you'll always be my first*.'

and then they fuck

*a very simple way to say something very complex, I know. I can't control my brain!

[veliseraptor]

Crime and Punishment in Mo Dao Zu Shi

So I've finally finished the essay I've been threatening to write for more than a year. A hearty thank you to @paradife-loft for early editing eyes and a coherence check, and @neuxue for further editing as well as last minute bonus translation.

First of all, a big ol’ disclaimer: I am working from a translated text where I do not have access to the original language. That generates a gap where potentially a great deal can be lost or altered in translation; hence, I’m going to avoid as much as possible attempting to do a close reading or lean too hard on language or word choice in my assessment of the novel, speaking in broader strokes. 

Additionally, I am coming at this from a perspective where I am predisposed to feel sympathy for villains/antagonists in a story, and I recognize that potentially creates a bias in my assessment. That being said, I think it’s a fair reading at the very least, if not an authoritative one. This essay will include spoilers for the entirety of the Grandmaster of Demonic Cultivation (MDZS) novel, as well as The Untamed (CQL), and minor spoilers in footnotes and a brief additional section for MXTX's other novels.

I will be touching on CQL in an appendix at the end, though to a lesser degree because analyzing visual media is less of my strong point. Nonetheless I think it is relevant that, despite the alteration of story details to arguably make the morality of the story more black/white, certain thematic resonances remain. 

All that being said, my point here is: MXTX (Mo Xiang Tong Xiu) as an author, and MDZS in particular, is at best skeptical of punitive justice; to put it more bluntly, the concept of characters “getting what they deserve” is, if not directly repudiated, then certainly not the point. To put it even more bluntly, MDZS doesn’t want to punish its villains, it just kills them, which (importantly) isn’t the same thing.

[READ THE REST, IT'S LONG AND HEAVILY FOOTNOTED]

[impossiblepluto]

Hello! Thank you so much for your interest in the Pick Your Poison Mini Event hosted by the Hurt & Comfort Bingo! Here’s your card, and feel free to use them as much as you want until the next round opens.Some reminders for the Pick Your Poison Mini Event:

There is no word minimum, and no word maximum.

Your work must be newly written and completed before marking off its square.

PYP cards are granted 1 reroll; I will use the prompts you have selected during signing up, but if you choose to have a new set of prompts, let me know!

Prompts are open to interpretation, but you are always free to ask for the definition or my interpretation of the prompts. Especially for prompts that are herbs, or come from another media/work!

Please DM the Hurt and Comfort Bingo blog to let me know that you received the card.

That’s all, thank you and have fun!

[alihightowers]

the labyrinth of us~

'July 18th, 2009 

My brain is defective, so they tell me /A tangled web of misfired neurons / Strung together like uneven roads with jagged edges that lead nowhere / Full of landmines hoping for a misstep / Carved fissures between thought and memory / Unfinished, temporary. / I don’t tell them the blackouts are getting worse / That sometimes I become lost in that empty space where nothing connects, swallowed by the void / Instead, I wait in the darkness, make friends with the silence until it speaks, reaching out with a faint whisper.

Two words. Simple. Heavy. 

“Save her.” '

(the butterfly effect au no one asked for, but I'll be writing anyways because this post by @ladyalayne gave me thoughts and feelings. so credits to you babes for the mess I'm about to make lol!)

[emlovessid]

@jegulus-microfic december 13, jail, 92 words

“Would you still love me if I went to jail?” Regulus asks one morning over breakfast.

James pauses with a piece of toast halfway to his mouth, “Depends what you did.”

“Depends?”

“Yes, depends,” James laughs. “I love you, but there’s some things even I couldn’t forgive.”

“Like what?”

James takes a bite of his toast, chewing as he tilts his head to the side, deep in thought before saying, “Like if you killed Sirius. Or Remus.”

“What if I killed Barty?” Regulus adds.

“Oh, love. I’d help you hide the body.”

[luminousalicorn]

New short story, science fiction, < 3,500 words.

[hedgerose]

Rules: Make a new post with the names of all the files in your WIP folder, regardless of how non-descriptive or ridiculous. Let people send you an ask with the title that most intrigues them, and then post a little snippet or tell them something about it! And then tag as many people as you have WIPs.

Stealing this from @ralbeleren

I haven't been writing a whole lot recently so here are things that I actually might finish.

of course it hurts (Young Royals, Wille/Simon, 2k)

(def)use (9-1-1, Buck/Eddie probably, 4.5k)

hopeless fountain kingdom (remix) (Black Sails, Flint/Thomas/Miranda, 7k)

hello, hello, hello (The Batman, gen, 1.5k)

Tagging @idoltina, @penguinutopia, @hollyandvice, and anyone else who wants to!

[sixerry]

Hey I did a thing. Not a thing that should be the first thing I write in forever, but fuck it, ya know?

[adnauseum11]

Northern Attitude Ch 9

“Me too.” She breathed and he looked up at her, her pulse already fluttering under his palm. She shifted above him, moving her legs to bring her hips into better alignment with his. Mac kissed him as her weight settled onto him, making him groan into her mouth, tugging on the base of her braid again. His hands were slow, making a meal out of getting her free from her cardigan and tracing the shape of her body under her shirt. She broke away from his mouth with a gasp when he tweaked her nipples, making her back arch. Logan used the opportunity to tug her shirt over her head, throwing it without looking. She looked down at his intense face, his palms cupping her breasts, her bra tugged low. His eyes were locked on her dusky pink nipples, inches from his face. She watched as his eyes fluttered closed and his mouth wrapped around one tightened bud, her palm instantly cupping the back of his head to keep him close. He groaned against her skin, the sound and vibration making her nerve endings sing. He leaned back, releasing her hard nipple with a pop and undid her bra, tugging the useless fabric from her body and throwing it in the same vague direction as the rest of her clothes. She bit her lip as his eyes stayed locked on her tits and tugged on his hair hard enough to finally break his concentration, the pale ring of blue nearly obliterated by the dilated black of his pupils.

Northern Attitude (48110 words) by Ad_nauseum Chapters: 9/? Fandom: Marvel, Marvel Cinematic Universe, Marvel (Comics) Rating: Explicit Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence Relationships: Logan (X-Men)/Original Female Character, Jane Foster/Thor, Pepper Potts/Tony Stark, Clint Barton/Laura Barton Characters: Logan (X-Men), James "Bucky" Barnes, Steve Rogers, Tony Stark, Clint Barton, Natasha Romanov (Marvel), Hank McCoy, Bruce Banner, Charles Xavier, Kurt Wagner, Pepper Potts, Darcy Lewis, Jane Foster (Marvel), Sam Wilson (Marvel), Matt Murdock, Nick Fury Additional Tags: no beta we die like women, Tony Stark Has A Heart, Bucky Barnes Needs a Hug, Bucky Barnes Recovering, Bucky Barnes Needs Therapy, Winter Soldier Bucky Barnes, Avengers Compound, Protective Steve Rogers, Steve Rogers Needs a Hug, Captain America Steve Rogers, Sam Wilson is a Gift, Protective Sam Wilson, Steve Rogers & Sam Wilson Friendship, Frenemies Bucky Barnes & Sam Wilson, Sam Wilson is not here for your shit, Human Disaster Matt Murdock, Clint Barton & Natasha Romanov Friendship, Past Bucky Barnes/Natasha Romanov, Alcoholic OFC, Depression, Suicide Attempt, Canada Olympic Women's Hockey Team Ensemble, Tony Stark Needs a Hug, Tony Stark Feels, Genius Tony Stark, Sassy Bucky Barnes, Sassy Steve Rogers, Logan is a Softie (X-Men), Protective Logan (X-Men), martial arts master Logan, Angst and Fluff and Smut, Shameless Smut, Original Character(s), X-Men References, Alternate Universe - X-Men Fusion, SHIP DARCY LEWIS WITH ALL THE THINGS, Therapist Sam Wilson, I'll Probably Keep Adding Tags, Medical Doctor Hank McCoy, Mental Health Issues, Logan has forgotten more about combat than you'll ever know, Logan in love is a dangerous man, hello unstoppable force, meet immovable object, Hockey, Alternate Universe - Canon Divergence, Spy Natasha Romanov, Penis In Vagina Sex, Cunnilingus, Blow Jobs Series: Part 3 of The Labyrinth Song Summary: As former Olympian Mackenzie Drouin tries to navigate life as a new amputee, her freshly minted boyfriend is reluctantly drawn into another intrigue. With the Winter Solider needing intervention before being cleared for field work again, the Avengers are down not one, but multiple members. They turn to Logan for help in filling the gap - only to have things go even further off the rails when worlds collide.

[corey-writes-stuff]

*Casually spends the entire day editing your WIP instead of writing the next chapter*