#something ive observed about myself over time is that i v much gravitate to the older generation of the cast- | Explore Tumblr Posts and Blogs

felixsaussieaccent · 6 years

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To All The (Stray) Kids I’ve Loved Before | vi

Member: Minho/Lee Know

i ii iii iv v vii viii ix

“So, what about you?” Jeongin asked as I pouted “I got nothin.” I said. Every school in the area wanted students to choose an after school activity, and sadly, crying was not accepted. Jeongin decided to join a trot singing club, aka a trot version of Glee, Jisung and Changbin already had their rapping “club” and Yeojin was already doing gymnastics. I sighed and tried to think of what to do. I asked Seungmin, if he knew where I should go, but he advised that it would be best if I picked out the activity.

Something about actually enjoying myself in an after school activity and not just doing something because I have to or something...damn his smarts. But I did take his advice and try to think about something I was passionate about or wanted to do. Dancing came to mind and the idea stuck. I mean, there was a dance school next to my high school and everyone praised it. 2/3 being because of the dancing, 1/3 being because the teachers were apparently very attractive.

I decided to sign up at the dance school and I was very anxious for it. Mainly because it was something new and I was scared I wouldn’t get along with anyone or that I wouldn’t be good at it. My anxiety got bigger as the date of the first dance lesson approached. Dance lessons every Monday, Wednesday and Friday meant less spending time with my friends. But that also meant I would get to get away from seeing the guys’ faces, which made me want to punch them, due to my confusing feelings towards them.

The first dance lesson on Monday finally arrived and I wasn’t exactly jumping with joy. I got to the dance room where I saw many people already stretching, so I decided to do the same. “You new here?” A girl with ashy blonde hair next to me asked “Yeah, is it obvious?” I asked “Nah, just haven’t seen you around yet. I’m Minyeon, I’ve been dancing here for 2 and a half years now, I’m basically teacher level, so if you ever need help anything, feel free to ask me.” She answered “Thanks.” I replied.

I was happy there was at least one person who was nice to me here.....she seemed really friendly and I kinda gravitated towards her all through the lesson. After the lesson, she invited me to go get drinks with some of the other dancers. We went to a near by cafe where they talked about the dance school and tried to explain everything I might need to know at the dance school.

“Thanks for explaining and taking the time to talk to me about it. I really appreciate it.” I said “Nonsense. We treat each member of this school with as much respect as possible. And we try to talk to each other as often as possible so we have great teamwork.” Minyeon said “Which reminds me, I hear there’s a new teacher who’s gonna start teaching new week and apparently he was BTS’ backup dancer, so you know he both talented and cute.” She added.

As the conversation went on, so did the day, so eventually we all paid for our drinks and went home. I finally got good WiFi, as the mobile data in the cafe was garbage and the WiFi was nonexistent, which meant getting 25 unread messages from the group chat me, Jeongin, Jisung, Yeojin and Changbin are in, Seungmin and Minyeon.

Minyeon

Hey, Minyeon here! just wanted to text you, so you get my number haha. Anyway, see you Wednesday!

Seungmin

End me 🙃

This activity is horrible😒

I thought babysitting was suppose to be fun, not a living nightmare

I want my tutoring job back🙃

Please tell me your failing a class 😫

Also, how did the dance lessons go?

404! GC NAME NOT FOUND

Dessert Fox🖍❤️

Hey, what’s up, it’s your boy,.....star of trot Glee😏

Yeojin🤪💗

Glad you’re enjoying it. There’s some new people here because of this whole activity thing and they are so annoying

Squirrel Boi🐿🧡

And this ladies and gentlemen, is why you make your own club, in order to do nothing and not have to do some stupid after school activity

....

I replied to all of them before falling asleep as soon as my head hit the pillow. The next day, Yeojin was ranting while Jisung and Changbin were gloating. The whole day was just a big pain, as I felt all of the exercise pain from yesterday beginning to start, which made me come to the dance lessons on Wednesday earlier, allowing me more time to stretch and prepare.

“Oh, sorry, didn’t know anyone would be here yet.” I said seeing that there was a man in the dance room. “Oh it’s fine, I was just warming up for my next class.” He said “Are you by any chance in the same class a Minyeon?” He asked as I nodded “Aaa! My new student! Nice to meet you, my name is Minho.” He said “I’m Y/N.” I introduced myself back “I’m quite new at this whole teaching thing, so if I’m a bit weird or awkward, please excuse my behaviour.” He warned “No, it’s fine, I’m new here too actually.” I reassured. “Oh, so we’re in this together then.” He chuckled.The time went by and more of the dancers arrived, but before anyone else arrived, Minho disappeared to the teacher’s room, I’m guessing. Minyeon greeted me before starting to stretch, which was quickly interrupted by Minho walking into the room.

“Hello, I am Minho, your new dance teacher. I’m new to teaching, so I apologize in advance.” He said, making the whole class giggle, resulting in me overhearing some “omg he’s cute”s and “he’s really attractive”s. “Anyway, shall we start? Are you all warmed up?” He asked as we all nodded “Great! So let’s begin our lesson.” He clapped his hands and smiled before putting on the music and showing us the first moves for us to get the vibe of the dance. His body moved as if he had no bones and I had to admit that I did maybe check him out several times, not only during his dance but also the lesson itself.

After the lesson, I felt like I was lacking in some parts of the choreography, so I stayed after everyone left and approached Minho. “Um, one question, would it be possible for you to show some moves again? I can’t really wrap my head around some of them.” I said, with an uncertain tone. “Oh, of course. Which ones?” He asked as the “private” lesson went on. “You’ve got the hang of it! Remember, if you feel like you need any more private lessons, I’m always here, ok?” He asked, smiling again before I nodded and thanked him. “See you on Friday!” I said before leaving the room.

LISTEN

Yeojin🤪💗

Wassup, my homie

First of all, never call me that

Like ever again

Second of all, I GOTTA NEW TEACHER AND HE CUTE

Yeojin🤪💗

OMG SPILL

I explained everything to her before finally going to bed, feeling way too exhausted to stay awake for even a second longer. Friday came around quickly and my anxiety had turned into excitement. The lessons became more fun and more exciting. Minho brought some type of chill atmosphere to the lesson and it became so much fun to attend these lessons and before I knew it, our first performance was near. I was excited but also scared I would mess the choreography up badly, asking Minho for those extra lessons.

“Your hip should be-May I?” He asked, his hand above my hip as he looked into the mirror to which I nodded and gulped. He put his hand on my hip and guided my hips to the rhythm. The move wasn’t very sexual or suggestive, it was a more cute and fun dance so my heart wasn’t beating faster because of the hip movement. It was mainly because I didn’t expect him to be this close. Through out the whole lesson, he was very close, which made my heart beat extremely fast, making me confused and unfocused, causing me to trip over my own legs and falling onto the ground with a lot of force.

I felt a bit of tears start to form in the corners of my eyes and a pain growing in my leg. “Omg, are you ok?” Minho bent down to me before trying to examine my leg. “It doesn’t feel broken, it’s probably just a big bruise...hold on.” He said as he got up to go get a first aid kit as I tried to get the ends of my legging higher so I could see the bruise. “Owww.” I commented at my own leg. It looked very bad, so I tried not to look at it too much. Minho came back and started patching up my leg. Once he was done, he helped me stand up, but with my new injury, I could barely stand properly, so I leaned into him for balance, which made my face turn really red.

I called my parent to pick me up, and Minho helped me to the car. “I hope your leg feels better, but I don’t think you should come to practice, you should rest, ok?” He said “No, I have to come, just to watch, if nothing else.” I said as he sighed and agreed to my idea.

The next time I came to practice, I had alreqdy gotten a crutch for my leg, causing every one of my dance teammates to tell me how I should rest. I tried to calm their worries by saying I’m only gonna watch, as I don’t want my minor injury to effect my dancing. Minho arrived into the room and told me to sit at the teacher’s corner and observe before starting the lesson. As the team went over the dance a few times, Minho came and sat next to me.

“How’s your leg?” He asked “It doesn’t hurt that much, the doctor said I’ll be good enough to dance till next Wednesday.” I said, happily “Do you think that’s gonna be enough time to study the choreography?” He asked as I remembered the performance is the Monday after the week I can start dancing again. “I don’t know, I would hope so, but I doubt it.” I answered, my tone getting sadder with every word. “It’s fine, don’t be sad about it, there’s always next performance!” He said, trying to cheer me up “Yeah, you’re right.” I replied, looking at the ground “Hey, you ok?” He asked, trying to see my reaction “Yeah.” I looked up at his face.

It was like he was examinating my face for any traces of sadness. “I’m not leaving until you smile.” Minho informed “What are you, Gordon Ramsey?” I joked, making him laugh. “It’s good that you haven’t lost your spirit, keep it up, I don’t wanna see a frown today, ok?” He smiled at me, waiting for my answer. I nodded and smiled back at him before he turned around and started teaching again.

He was very sweet the whole class, he kept checking up on me and making sure I don’t feel uncomfortable. At the end of the class, he helped me get to the elevator. “You know, I admire your passion. You didn’t have to come, you could have stayed at home and rested...but you didn’t. I see how much this means to you.” Minho said, waiting for my reaction as we stood in front of the elevator “Thanks.” I blushed and looked at the floor “You’re cute when you do that.” “Do what?” I looked up at him while being confused and probably looking like a tomato. “Look at the ground when you’re nervous or blushing.” He answered, making me blush even more.

Before I could answer, the elevator arrived and he stepped into the small room with me. “You don’t have to, if you don’t want to.” I said before he hit the button for the main floor “Nonsense! You could get lost in this big space!” He joked, making me laugh and look at the ground again “You did it again.” He smiled “sorry I-“ “Don’t apologize, i said it was cute, remember?” He reminded, which resulted in me matching one of the red walls of the elevator. “You have something on you face.” He said as I tried to look at the mirror before he put his hand on my face. “It’s just an eyelash.” He explained as I realized how close we are again, looking down, making him realize as well. “I-“ I tried to say something, but my mind was blank. He stared at my face, waiting for any reaction before I felt his stare and looked at him. Our eyes were focused on each other and that’s when his eyes quickly made their way towards my lips and back to my eyes. Next thing I knew, he was leaning in as his eyes were closing and I panicked. I took a deep breath before mimicking his actions.

*Ding*

Right as our lips were about to touch, the elevator door opened, making us pull apart. “Oh, um, I’ll see you next lesson, then.” I said before quickly making my way out of the elevator “Um, yeah, see you then!” He said before pressing a button to get back up. I made my way to the car as I sighed and closed my eyes. So close.

Throughout the lessons, Minho still checked up on me and my leg, but there was an awkward aura everyone could sense, resulting in the members asking me about it, and me answering that it’s probably just in their minds. I couldn’t stop thinking about it though. His lips were so close to mine and he smelled so good. If my mind was like this after almost kissing him, I wonder what it would be like after actually kissing him. I tried to distract my mind and not think about the almost kiss or Minho, which was hard, as I kept staring at him during the lessons and I’m pretty sure everyone noticed.

Minyeon💃🏻

Omg, your crush on Minho is so obvious😂 calm down the heart eyes lol

For your information, i do not have a crush on him, my eyes just happen to drift towards him and then resemble hearts, ok 😤

Minyeon 💃🏻

Sure 👀

The day of the preformance finally arrived and I decided to come before it actually started, to cheer them on. I didn’t have my crutch anymore, but I couldn’t dance with them, so I felt really bad and guilty about it, even if they kept reassuring me that it was fine. Minho came into the room with a suit, making me “heart eyes” literally form heart eyes. He looked so good in that suit, that I forgot about the conversation I was having with Minyeon and the other dancers. “Heart eyes.” Minyeon teased, making the other dancers chuckle and me playfully slap her arm. It was time for them to preform and I sat next to Minho throughout the whole ceremony and commented about how no team can compare to ours.

“You call that dancing? My cats could do better!” He whispered to me “You have cats?” I said, excitedly “Yeah, wanna see them?” He asked, his tone resembling a proud mom. ��Duh.” I said as he took out his phone and showed me a picture “That one is named Soon-ie and this one is named Doong-ie.” He said “Awwweeee, cute.” I awed at the two cats “just like their owner.” I whispered to myself “What was that?” He asked “Nothing” I answered, smiling. “They’re a pain sometimes but when they’re that cute, you don’t mind.” He joked, making me chuckle.

Our team preformed really well and we hyped them up so much during the preformance, some of the people near us told us to be quieter, resulting in some awkward silence fro us. After the preformance, Minho decided to treat the whole team as they all cheered. I congratulated and praised them all before making my way to the door. “Where are you going?” Minho asked “You’re apart of this team too, come on.” He added, making me smile as we went to a near by restaurants, where we toasted to Minho and the team (with Coca Cola).

He kept looking at me during the meal and Minyeon even smirked at me at times, raising her eyebrow and “taking a selfie” which was really just a sly way of taking a photo of me and Minho. She later sent me that photo, almost giving me a heart attack. “So, thank you all for your hard work, it paid off and I hope you all continue to show your passion and talent! You did great!” Minho said as a goodbye before the members all left.

“How are we always left alone?” He asked me “I’m waiting for my parent to pick me up, I don’t know your excuse.” I joked as he chuckled. “Why are you looking at me like that?” I asked, blushing “I don’t know, you’re just real cute.” He answered, still staring. I blushed, looking at the ground before hearing his chuckle “As always.” He commented “Hey, leave me and my shyness alone!” I joked before a stranger bumped into him accidentally, causing Minho and I’s distance to minimize. “Oh, hi.” He chuckled, realizing our faces are centimeters apart “Hi.” I said back before I found myself in the same situation as in the elevator. But this time, there was no *ding*. His lips touched mine and we both just stood there, kissing for about half a minute before pulling away and looking at each other, both of us not knowing what to do or say.

“Oh, I gotta go, that’s my ride.” I said, looking over and seeing a car approach. “Ok, well, um, good night!” He said calmly “Good night!” I said before making my way into the car and driving off.

Dear Minho,

.......

A/N: y’all already know that

1. This is garbage

2. I didn’t proof read this at all

So I hope you enjoyed this, thought I doubt you did, since as I said, this is trash. But yeah I did this super last minute and I didn’t proof read so I apologize for that lmao. I’m also planning a soulmate au one shot but idk which member to write abt so hit my inbox up lmao

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mrsrcbinscn · 5 years

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BDRPWriMo Task #6 - 10 Short-Short Stories

Task #6: Write ten short-short stories of no more than a paragraph long.

Franny Robinson’s musical influences; ten interview quotes about other musicians and singers that she says inspire her work

i. Jenny Lewis

“I dunno, there’s just-” Robinson paused and with her palms flat up, made claws with her hands as she searched for the words. “-something so honest about Jenny. I had the honor of performing with her once and I was just in awe. I think I have a little bit of a crush on her. I was first introduced to her work in 2001 by a great friend of mine from college, Dani Weiss [currently a member of the American-Canadian newgrass band The Weepy Willows]. We were...going on a little trip -

Q: Acid or shrooms?

“My husband is sitting right there, oh god. Acid. In moderation, I think things like that can be worthwhile experiences. In moderation. We were doing acid in her apartment and listenin’ to music and she [Weiss] put on their album Take Offs and Landings. I was real into it from Go Ahead [the first track]. Which. I always liked chill music when I dropped acid, anything too loud and busy made me anxious. And when the followup, The Execution of All Things came out, it was like - I was like - just like, ‘damn, this woman is amazing.’ Her songwriting ability is just phenomenal and her voice- I feel like I’m sittin’ across from her and she’s tellin’ me stories. There’s- again, the only thing I can think of is this honesty about her.”

ii. Hizuru

“Japan actually has a vibrant history with jazz music, so I’m familiar with a lot of Japanese jazz and have had the honor of working with many talented Japanese jazz musicians. I don’t know very much about Hizuru, actually, other than I love them. I have been experimenting with incorporating traditional Cambodian music with, you know, jazz and other western styles of music. That part of my culture is very important to me, so I want - I want to show the world how beautiful instruments like tro and chapei are. Anyway- I was struggling with a balance of sounds when in 2017 I stumbled upon a Hizuru song called - oh, god, I don’t speak Japanese, so I’ll probably butcher this. The song is called Ushiwakamaru. It is an instrumental piece, as is the entire self-titled album, and the blend of traditional Japanese music and modern jazz on that entire album is perfection. I hope they come out with more soon, I am hungry for more, truly.”

iii. Ella Fitzgerald

Q: Of the early jazz vocalists, who inspires you the most?

“Oh my god, Ella Fitzgerald. Well - mm, no, absolutely her, no question. I am by no means implying I live up to her standard, in fact I never will, but I have channeled her. Especially in my earlier work when I was a bit more concerned with going what jazz fans want, expect, and love versus taking lessons from those who came before me and building on that with my own ideas, my own voice. If that makes sense? She was classic. It’s Only A Paper Moon was, I think, the first jazz song I heard when I was little. Or, it was the first that really struck me. [laughs] My oldest brother used his birthday money to buy an Ella Fitzgerald album for me on vinyl so I would stop running around the house singing the only lyrics I remembered. I think it was like [singing]- Say, its only a paper moon, sailing over a cardboard sea...and I forgot the rest so I could just repeat cardboard sea like three times.”

iv. Patsy Cline

“I’m from Georgia,” laughs Robinson, running a hand through her hair as she pulls her feet up under her on the chaise lounge in her Swynlake home. “Like, out in the country in Georgia. You couldn’t grow up there in the eighties and not have known who Patsy Cline and Dolly Parton were. Dolly was more, like, relevant and current, but Patsy’s a classic. And as a woman whose natural register is lower myself, I really appreciated being able to sing along decently well without much effort. We don’t - we don’t get to see alto voices in popular music a lot. Pop, even the jazz music that gets a following outside of hardcore jazz fans. Hitting the craziest high notes does seem to be a current trend across the genre spectrum.”

When asked if that was a bad thing, Robinson simply shook her head. “I don’t think it;s positive or negative one way or the other. It’s just an observation.”

v. Ahmad Jamal

“I mean, if you want to talk jazz pianists, you can’t not talk about Ahmad Jamal. On Green Dolphin Street? Autumn Rain? F---, man, leaving him out is criminal. He’s been in the game for five decades, that’s longer than I’ve been alive. I only hope to be on his level. Like, I hear words from his piano. I understand what I’m supposed to be feeling, thinking, or seeing when I listen to his work. And with instrumental music, that’s a challenge. Classical? I struggle to listen to classical music. I think it’s beautiful, and I really respect classical musicians, but unless I’m explicitly aware of what picture this piece is supposed to paint in my head, when I tell a classical expert what a piece makes me feel, they’re usually like ‘ACTUALLY...’

vi. Édith Piaf

“My father - well, he’s technically my stepfather,” Robinson said, scowling at the word like it was a swear. “But, he adopted me when he married my mother, and my biological father may as well have been a sperm donor. Anyway. My father is from Switzerland, and they have four official languages there. He speaks them all, plus English, plus he learned to speak Khmer when he married my mother. He’s so cool, my dad. He’s from a Francophone-Italophone Swiss family, so I grew up listening to a lot of old French, Italian, and some German music from him. I still don’t speak German and Italian though, [laughs] sorry Dad.”

“We listened to Édith Piaf a lot together. I was very protective of my mother as a child, you know how kids of single moms are? My mom was my superhero and I was used to American men thinking they had a right to touch her because she was just a poor foreign woman who owned a restaurant. So when my future dad started hanging around, I hated him. But he was determined to make me like him so I’d let him marry my mother, and he’d take me for ice cream and play Édith Piaf cassettes in the car. He’d tell me about what the love songs meant, and didn’t tell me about the songs that weren’t, and told me the love songs are how he felt about my mother. He was like, ‘Dara-’ my legal first name is Darareaksmey, it’s Khmer. My parents usually calls me ‘Dara.’ ‘Dara, if you let me, I’ll be good to your mother, and to you.’ I eventually got tired of him begging me to marry my mom so I let him. [laughs]

I asked if she ever regretted giving him her blessing.

“No, never. He’s my dad, and the two boys he brought into the marriage are my older brothers. I’m my Swiss grandparents’ only granddaughter, so they spoiled me even from Switzerland. No, we’re family.”

vii. Dolores O'Riordan

Interview date, 26th of January, 2018

Q: Let’s talk about something I just found out about you from your Twitter feed the other day.

A: Oh, no, should I tell my husband to cover his ears?

Q: No, it’s rated H for Husband.

A: Excellent.

Q: You’re a huge fan of Dolores O’Riordan. Which, I wouldn’t have guessed. But on the day the tragic news of her passing broke, you Tweeted out a tribute to her including ffive meet and greet pictures of the two of you together- the first, correct me if I’m wrong, is from 1994?

A: Yes, yes I had actually seen then the year prior, when I was thirteen, but ‘94 was the first time I could afford a backstage package with my babysitting money. The other four are from 1999, 2002, 2010, and 2016. I loved The Cranberries, they were the first concert I dragged my husband to when we were dating.

Q: Safe to say you’ve been a hardcore fan for-

A: Two and a half decades, yeah. Yeah, The Cranberries are one of my all time favorites. Dolores O’Riordan’s voice was...everything.

Q: You’re a jazz artist, primarily. What’s consistently drawn you to The Cranberries?

A: [laughs] Other than being a teenager in the 90′s? I mean, her voice. She changed the game for what it meant to be a female vocalist in rock music. And up until my second year at NYU, I wasn’t sure where I was going with music. I loved rock, I loved jazz, I was into R&B, I loved bluegrass. I sang in several bands in high school and college, and The Cranberries were usually on the setlist. Her voice was amazing. I idolized her as a young vocalist, even if I ended up gravitating toward a different genre.

Q: You uploaded a cover of Dreams with Irish alt-rock singer and guitarist Padraig Chen, and Irish indie musician Siobhán Walsh as well. How did that collaboration come about?

A: Padraig’s been a friend of mine for a long time; we met through a mutual friend who is also an Asian-diaspora musician in the UK and Ireland and it was a match made in music heaven. We’ve collaborated a lot. Siobhán is a friend of Pat’s, and we all looked up to Dolores, so we just got together and made our little tribute to her.

viii. Badi Assad

“I was first introduced to bossa nova...probably during my sophomore year of college. Her voice is like butter, but frankly, that’s not the most interesting thing about her. She combines traditional jazz, bossa nova, other Latin music elements, and traditional Middle Eastern sounds. Anything that is a marriage of different tastes and cultures is interesting to me, and when its done as well as she does it? Forget it. She is one of the best jazz and jazz-adjacent guitarists out there today. I really admire her. I hope to perform with her one day, it’s genuinely a dream of mine.”

ix. Ros Serey Sothea

“One of my most unexpected musical influences...well, I don’t - I don’t think she’s so much unexpected, as any of my following outside of my small Cambodian or Khmer-American following won’t have ever heard of. Ros Serey Sothea is one of the most important singer in Khmer popular music history, she’s called the Golden Voice. My mother would sing her songs to me as a child, whichever of them she could remember. Under the Khmer Rogue, which my mother survived, something like 90% of Cambodia’s artists, dancers, musicians, and singers died or were executed. She was one of them. And my mother’s favorite singer. Most of the master recordings from her and other singers like Pen Ran and Sinn Sisamouth were destroyed by the Khmer Rogue, so whatever recordings we do have of Khmer rock and roll from that era are so, so vital to preserve and keep record of. Even though I am a jazz music educator, at my lower level, more generic classes where I have the wiggle room to do so, I talk about Khmer music of the 60s and early 70s for a class because I feel so strongly about the legacy of this music.”

“I went on a tangent,” Robinson said apologetically. “Where was I? Oh, Ros Serey Sothea. Right, so her voice was just-” Robinson put her arms out to her side and swayed to the imaginary music in her head. “-you could just kind groove like this to only her voice, nothing else needed. Her voice danced on top of the backing band. My mother managed to get her hands on some records, her siblings who remained in Cambodia sent some to us and her other siblings who were resettled, in the mid-eighties. So, I was six or seven before I heard my first Khmer song from a record player or a cassette instead of my mother’s voice, even though she’d been singing to me since I was born. These songs are still incredibly important to Cambodians today, and diaspora as well.”

I asked her if that had anything to do with the semi-viral success of her recent cover of 70′s singer Sieng Vannthy’s ‘Console Me’.

“Oh, for sure.” Robinson said. "It’s the first time I professionally recorded a song in Khmer, a lot of people were surprised I spoke the language.”

x. Dolly Parton

“Okay, Dolly probably has less of an influence on my music than my persona, I’ll be honest. But her music means so much to me. At my wedding, during toasts, my mother mortified me by throwin’ in video footage of my first ever live performance from ‘89. Little nine-year-old Franny was on stage in little secondhand cowboy boots, this horribly 80s lookin’ frilly dress, my hair in little twin braids, singin’ and dancin’ to Why’d You Come In Here Lookin’ Like That. To this day, my husband still brings that up.”

Q: How do you mean Dolly Parton influenced your persona?

“Great question. So, our origins are similar. Kind of. She grew up poor one of twelve children, I grew up poor, one of three. My family eventually was lucky enough to make it out of the poverty I was born into but we were still always poor, you know? Like. I remember my mom rationing her food so I could eat enough until that stopped when I was about seven and my mom didn’t have to make a meal for herself last two meals. And we’re both from the American South.”

“I grew up on Dolly. She’s the queen of our people [laughs] and I’m not even being facetious. We love her. Can’t get enough of her. And I include myself in that; Dolly Parton is an icon. She is unashamed of who she is and where she comes from, which really struck a chord with me. As the American-born daughter of a refugee, I was always caught between two cultures. Am I Cambodian, am I American? Which can I claim? My mother taught to me my Cambodian culture, our Vietnamese friends taught me about Vietnamese culture, but my white father was from Switzerland so I didn’t learn to be American until school. That’s when I started droppin’ my G’s, sayin’ y’all and ain’t, and asking my parents to make grits for breakfast when they’d never eaten them before in their immigrant lives. I wanted so badly to just be seen as American, to be seen as just a girl from Georgia. If it weren’t for my mother refusing to let me speak English to her at home I would have lost my Khmer. She spoke English just fine, but English was for Out There.”

“My mom taught me to be proudly Cambodian, but I’m not just Cambodian, right? I mean, I’m biracial, sure. But more importantly, I’m bi-cultural. I’m not just Cambodian, I’m American - Southern, if we wanna get real specific. Both of my cultures are vibrant, and beautiful, and are equally important to me. My mom taught me not to be ashamed to be the daughter of a refugee - she didn’t get into specifics until I was older, but she was always made it clear she had Been Through Some Shit and could handle anything. Even now, when I go through something difficult I just tell myself, ‘Mom survived genocide, you can do whatever this is.’ I knew how to be proudly Cambodian, I knew how to wear traditional dress to nice events, and wear Khmer wedding clothes for my wedding instead of a white dress. But I didn’t know how to embrace this other part of myself - because wasn’t raised in the default Middle America. Even my American side is a type of odd culture, isn’t it?

Dolly Parton taught me not to be ashamed of the other half of where I came from. She is unapologetic about bein’ who she is. She is proud of where she came from. And I want to be the Dolly Parton of my rural Georgia town. My identities as Cambodian and Georgian are more important to be than my identity as, like, an American person in general. I want people to think, ‘that’s a Georgia woman’ when they think of me, just like you look at Dolly and say ‘that’s a Appalachian girl’ before you just go ‘oh, she’s American.’

#bdrpwrimomckala #bdrpwrimo #&&...hc #// some of these got long fight me #franny has feelings about music

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