#something about it being the last part of the rush and the EASIEST at the same time is hmm 🤔

[unexpectedbrickattack]

I still listen to the end of unexpectancy phase 3 looking like this

[ahgasegotarmy116]

Faking It | Jeon Jungkook | Chapter One

Summary: Being divorced by the time you're thirty isn't the best feeling in the world but what happens when your parents find someone from your past that's in a similar boat? Pairing: f!reader (30) x Single Dad Jungkook (33) (Arranged Marriage Slow Burn?) Word Count: 11.3k (oh man holy shit) Warnings: Troubles with conceiving/seeing pregnancies to full term, Jungkook's first wife passed away in childbirth. (These themes will be spoken about throughout the fic and I will add extra warnings when need be in future chapters) a/n: Okay this one is gonna be a long one (in terms of chapter length, idk how many parts there will be) I'm really really in love with this story line so I hope you'll come along this cute, silly, awkward, heartwarming and heartbreaking journey with me 🥰 p.s. I've been brainstorming with @kkusadmirer (ofc 🤭) about this fic for a while now and I've just fallen in love with these characters too much that I had to get at least one part out. Okay okay enough from me. I hope you enjoy! (barely edited per usual I'm sry 😅)

"You should start dating again" my mom says to me, a dinner with a table for two this time since she said she wanted to talk to me about something important. If I would've known it was to nag me about something like this again I would've declined the invitation.

"Mom I already told you, I just got divo-" "You got divorced last year" she cuts me off and I sigh, knowing I'll probably get no where with this argument but continue on nevertheless.

"Point being, it hasn't been that long since Robert and I got divorced. I need time and space to figure out what I want out of life. I'm not interested in rushing into another marriage just for it to fail again" I explain and she simply downs the rest of her champagne in response, polishing it off in record time.

"You don't want to end up an old maid who didn't give me any grandchildren do you?" she says, repeating the same old argument again. "Mom I'm thirty, not forty five. I still have plenty of time to worry about babies and getting married again" I argue and she rolls her eyes before asking for another glass when the waiter passes by.

"You should at least try. Don't you like going out on dates?" she asks and I sigh, hating having this conversation over and over again.

"Dating was fun in my twenties but now that I'm more interested in finding someone to settle down with, it seems like all the guys that are remotely my age and happen to be decent human beings are already married" I explain and watch how she immediately takes her glass of champagne off the table once it's placed in front of her.

I'm glad she's drinking because having this conversation with her when she's sober is even more painful.

"You're exaggerating honey. I'm sure there is a fine young man just waiting for you around the corner" but before I'm able to respond to her, her eyes suddenly light up and she quickly gets out of her seat.

"Is it really you?" she says and another woman around her age that I've never seen before comes up to greet her. "How are you? It's been so long!" the mystery woman says and they quickly share an embrace before she turns to face me.

"And who is this beautiful young woman here with you?" she asks, making me shy away from them. "Oh this is my daughter y/n. Y/n this is Mrs. Jeon" she introduces us and tells me all about how they used to go to college together.

"Oh wow I think I remember my mom mentioning you before. You used to come over when I was little right?" I question, now remembering seeing her face in some of the pictures in my baby album.

"That's right! Little Jungkook and I used to come visit you all the time when you were just a teeny tiny little thing. You were the easiest baby I've ever come across, always sleeping and when you woke up you were as happy as can be" she rambles and I get a warm feeling in my chest, loving to have met someone who clearly cared so deeply for my mother and I.

"Who's Jungkook" I ask, looking back and forth between the two of them. "Jungkook is my son, he's just a few years older than you. I remember he was so fascinated by you, always wanting to come over and would watch over you as you slept, never causing a fuss as long as you were around" she says and I blush at the fact that her son would care about me just as much if not more than she does.

"How is he? Is he doing alright?" my mother asks and Mrs. Jeon gets a somber look on her face eyes fluttering to the floor before responding.

"Actually, he lost his wife a few years ago. She passed away after she gave birth to their daughter" she mumbles and I feel my chest tighten up at the thought of someone so young losing their life to something that is supposed to be so beautiful.

"My condolences to you all" I say, my eyes going glossy and she smiles in return, the memory bringing a tear to her eye as well. "Thank you love, that's very kind of you" she says, placing a hand on my shoulder before she clears her throat and blinks back her tears, wanting to put on a brave face in public.

"Why don't you come visit us at our home tomorrow evening? I would love to catch up and it would be good if the kids got reacquainted again" my mother suggests and I glare at her, knowing exactly what she's doing but also knowing there's no way I could stop her. 

"I would love that! Our husbands might enjoy catching up too since they used to get along so well" Mrs. Jeon points out. "Then it's settled! How would you feel about making it a dinner instead?" my mother questions, digging us deeper into this evening we'll all be spending together. "I think that sounds perfect!" she agrees and I tune out the rest of the conversation, already trying to mentally prepare myself for the scheming I know my mother has planned.

~~~~

Kicking off my shoes and walking into my apartment I'm greeted by the serene sound of silence. 

My black tuxedo cat meows as he jumps down from his cat tower and stretches for a second before coming over to greet me. "Hi Salem" I say, scooping him up and carrying him with me into my bedroom where I plop him down in the middle of my bed. "Mom only invited me to dinner because she wanted to tell me to start dating again" I relay to him, while I walk around my room, grabbing all the things I'll need to get ready for bed.

"I should've known she was up to something when she decided to invite me out on a random Wednesday night to go to my favorite restaurant. If the previous glances I had of the totals on those receipts didn't clue me in enough I don't know what would" I say in disbelief, having convinced myself hours earlier that it might've been about something good instead of another chance to nag me about something.

"I don't know why I even bother sometimes. She just has this worst case scenario mindset that I'm going to die alone and not leave a legacy. I understand that I'm their only child but with the way she talks, you would think I was well into my forties already" I say, verbally processing to him while he curls up into a ball, his eyes watch me walk back and forth until I walk into the en-suite bathroom to turn on the shower.

"Thanks for always listening to me Salem" I say, walking back over to him and scratching his head, "Don't know what I would do without you" I mumble before walking back over to the bathroom and closing the door.

Looking in the mirror I study my features, my hair styled just how I like it, my brows perfectly shaped but when I get to my eyes I notice it. I notice why my mother has gotten so worried about me.

It's as if the light's gone out of them. It's more than just 'Hey it's been a long day and I'm tired' no it's 'I don't even know what I'm doing here anymore' and for the first time, I admit to myself that I truly feel that way.

I reach for my cleanser and quickly wash off the little makeup that I still have on, lips completely plain and gone back to their natural color and some how my cheeks don't seem to be as rosy anymore after I had made sure to put on some more blush today to bring some color back to my face. Maybe it's not the makeup that's been washing me out, but the way that I've been living.

I will admit my days consist of going to work and coming home and doing that same thing over and over again. I don't really go out much and I only have a few friends but ever since I got divorced I just end up politely declining any sort of invitation I get from them. Doesn't matter if it's dinner or drinks or clubbing or even just a shopping trip.

I just can't get myself wanting to do anything anymore.

I step into the shower and I flinch slightly at the burning sensation the hot water brings to me but adjust it and step further under the stream once it's just to my liking. While going though my shower routine mindlessly I start trying to get to the bottom of what has got me living like this.

Robert wasn't the best husband in the world, mainly because he cheated on me but before that things were good between us. He made me laugh and was a perfect gentleman that always made me feel special and when we got married I swear I thought I couldn't be happier. 

It felt like my life was falling into place, our life.

Until it wasn't.

I'm knocked out of my train of thought when I hear Salem pawing at the door and remember now that in my whirl winded state of mind I forgot to feed him. "Sorry Salem I'll be right out!" I call out for him and he meows in response. I swear that cat is more intelligent than I am most days.

I finish up my uninteresting night as I always do, turning out the lights and cuddling up with Salem until I eventually fall asleep but it took a little longer tonight. Thoughts full of what my future might look like if I don't start living instead of just existing. 

As the 'what ifs' plague my mind they eventually drown themselves out as that same welcoming feeling of calm finally lulls me to sleep. 

~~~~~~

"Hurry up they're almost here" my mother says, yanking me inside the house before I even have a chance to knock on the front door. "Nice to see you too mom" I say under my breath and she's wound up so tight it doesn't even phase her. I can tell she's been working hard to make sure everything is perfect once the Jeons arrive.

"Did you get that wine I told you to get?" she questions, her eyes lighting up at the sight of the wine bottle carrier in my hand, quickly taking it and rushing into the kitchen. "Yeah no problem mom you're welcome" I say, talking to the air in front of me still waiting for her to show any sign of gratitude.

"Go place your things in your old room so they're out of the way" she call out, leaving me sighing and trudging off to do as she says.

Once I retrace my steps and walk past the door to go to join her in the kitchen I'm stopped in my tracks when the doorbell rings.

"Oh honey can you get that? My hands are tied here" my mom yells and I take a deep breath in and out before doing just that.

"Hello y/n! It's so nice to see you again" Mrs. Jeon greets me as I step aside and let them in, soon after her is her husband who holds out his hand in greeting. "It's been quiet a long time hasn't it? I remember when you use to be-" "Grandpa! Grandpa! I wanna meet the pretty lady too!" a little girl no older than five years old says, walking around her grandfather's legs to get to me, greeting me with the most adorable bunny smile.

"And now who might this be?" I ask, already melting into a puddle from seeing how absolutely adorable she is. "I'm Juni" she laughs when I go down to her level. "Well it's very nice to meet you Juni and how old are you?" I ask and she lights up when I continue taking an interest in her. "I'm four! Well Daddy says I'm turning five soon but it feels like it's taking forever. Right Daddy?" she says and looks back towards the man now left standing in the doorway.

"That's right Juni" he responds and the deep tenor of his voice sends a slight shiver down my spine, so full of love and admiration that is obvious to anyone who might come across the pair. "Oh!" I say, quickly straightening back up to meet this mysterious Jungkook and my throat goes dry once I've laid eyes on him.

Tall, strong build, dark brown hair that's well taken care of and styled perfectly, strong jawline accompanied by the contrast of the softest look in his brown almost black galaxy eyes that are still focused on his beautiful daughter.

"I'm sorry" I say but he shakes his head before he turns his head in my direction, taking in the sight of me as well before speaking. "That's alright, Juni kind of grabs everyone's attention right away" he says giving me a soft smile. "I'm Jungkook" he says, holding his hand out to me. "Y/n" I say shyly and shake it, his hands being much larger than mine is comforting in a way.

"My mom told me we used to come see you when we still lived here" he says once we let go, Juni now quietly watching our exchange. "Used to?" I question, curious to know more about why our mothers had lost touch. "We went back to our hometown for a while and then moved back to the city soon after Juni was born" he says and I nod my head, accepting that as an answer for now but wanting to know more.

"Sounds like I was just an infant though so I don't really have any memory of it" I admit while rocking back and forth on my heels, a nervous habit I've picked up over the years. "It's alright, I didn't expect you to remember" he chuckles, "I was only three so I don't remember much of it either" we laugh at his returned confession and a more comfortable air settles between us.

"Well it's nice to finally meet you" I say and he nods his head. "Likewise" he replies and we stand there for a moment, not really knowing where to go from here then, thankfully Juni breaks the silence.

"Daddy I wanna talk to the pretty lady" she says and grabs my hand and pulls me away from him. "Be nice Juni" he warns and she pouts, leaving me crouching down to her level and tilting my head to meet her gaze. "There's enough of me to go around little one. Don't worry" I say, booping her on the nose and making her giggle again.

Jungkook walks in a bit more and closes the door behind him, watching our little exchange before my mother comes out to check on us.

"Y/n why don't you take Jungkook and..." she says trailing off, not having learned his daughter's name yet. "Juni" Jungkook says and my mother smiles at the sound of the adorable name. "Jungkook and Juni outside. I'm sure she'd love to run around a little bit before dinner is ready" she suggests and I agree while Juni starts jumping up and down, excited to explore an unfamiliar place.

Jungkook follows closely behind as I lead the way but I ultimately end up getting dragged along by Juni who is surprisingly perceptive and has already mapped out the door that we'll be going through. "Come on Daddy keep up!" she calls after him once we've reached the door, looking back and seeing that he's fallen behind.

"I'm right behind you Juni" Jungkook chuckles and once we step outside Juni lets go and runs back and forth all around the yard, looking at anything and everything she can find.

"Be careful!" I say, worried that she could hurt herself but Jungkook comes over and stands next to me and reassures me she'll be fine.

"It's alright, if she gets hurt it'll be a little reminder to pay attention to what she's doing next time. That's the only way kids really learn right?" he says turning towards me, granting me with a soft smile, almost as if he's looking for validation on his parenting choice.

"Of course," I respond, returning the smile, "even some adults need to crash and burn before they learn their lesson sometimes" I point out and it makes him relax a bit more, thankful to see that he's right in his dealings with situations like this.

"She's a good kid" I say after leading him over to the patio set we have out here so we can sit down and watch her. "Thanks, it's been difficult raising her on my own so I'm never really sure if I'm doing a good job or not" he admits and I nod my head, taking a second to think about my response since it's a sensitive subject.

"I can tell that you love her very much so I have no doubt in my mind that you'll always do right by her" and I can tell that my words bring him a sense of comfort. Being a single parent can be extremely difficult especially when you lose the love of your life as soon as you become a father. 

I wouldn't wish that pain on anyone.

"Y/n?" I hear him call out and realize that my mind had drifted off for a second. "I'm sorry what did you say?" I say, my cheeks heating up from having been caught daydreaming. "I asked if you had any children of your own" he chuckles and I again try to figure out the best way to word this but figure the best way to go about it is to be honest. 

I've got no reason to hide from him.

"No, I got divorced last year and my ex husband and I were never able to have children" I say, looking down at my lap, embarrassed to have admitted it but also feeling a certain weight lifted off my shoulders.

"Oh, I'm sorry. I didn't know" he trails off and I panic, realizing I might've made him feel uncomfortable, telling him something so personal so soon. "No don't be, I honestly dodged a bullet with that one" I chuckle, hoping to lighten the situation a bit which thankfully it does as I see his body relax a bit.

"Our relationship had been on the rocks soon after we got married and I don't think we were a good match for each other so I think it was the universe's way of doing me a favor in making us somewhat biologically incompatible" I chuckle and he softly does the same.

"Biologically incompatible" he questions, a deeper meaning obviously hidden behind those words. "We both got checked out and everything looked completely fine but I guess it wasn't meant to be, thank God" I sigh, sincerely thanking whoever might've been in charge of making that executive decision for us.

"I'm not exactly sure what to say to that but I'm glad it worked out?" he states almost as if it was a question and I laugh, in response hoping I can recover this incredibly awkward conversation. "I'm sorry, that was a huge overshare that I probably should've kept to myself" I say, clearing my throat in hopes it would aid in clearing the peculiar air that had settled between us.

"You have nothing to apologize for, I asked and I feel honored that you felt comfortable enough to be so transparent with your answer" he says, the warmth in his tone giving me an ache in my chest. How could someone be so kind to someone they've just met? It's as if I could tell him anything and he would listen to me as if I was the only person in the world.

"Daddy!" 'Well me and Juni', I say to myself and watch as his attention now shifts to his daughter who is running up behind me. "Daddy look!" Juni says, holding out her hands that are now thoroughly caked in mud but hold a rock that is almost a perfectly shaped heart in the center of her palm. "Oh Juni" Jungkook chuckles, the ends of her dress now matching the state of her hands and neither Jungkook nor I can hold in our laughter.

"That's a very beautiful rock Juni! You're so clever" I say and I can see a sense of pride straighten her posture a little bit. "Juni your beautiful dress" Jungkook chuckles, clearly not minding but also trying to figure out what to do. "I'm sorry Daddy" she say, that pride slowly dwindling after seeing the mess she's made of herself.

"Hey Juni" I say, turning her attention back to me and I can see her spirits lift a little. "Would you like to see some of the clothes that I used to wear when I was your age?" I ask and her eyes light up at the thought. "Did you wear pretty dresses too?" she asks, clearly excited about seeing more new things. Her childlike wonderment makes my heart ache. Must run in the family.

"I did, but none of them were as pretty as yours. If you like, you can borrow one of mine while we wash this one" I suggest and the way her head nods up and down so fast makes me chuckle.

"Let's go to my room then! Hopefully we can find something you'll like" I say, standing up and straightening my dress while Jungkook reaches out for Juni's foot.

"Let's take your shoes off before we go back inside baby. We wouldn't want to track any mud into the pretty lady's house right?" Jungkook says, flashing a soft smile at me before looking back down to complete his intended task and Juni complies right away. 

My breath hitches as he purposefully uses the nickname Juni had given me and I quickly walk past them and open the door to go inside, trying to clear my head for a second, willing myself to keep it together.  

"Are you coming with us?" Juni asks and he nods his head, "I gotta go clean your shoes off first though" he says and I walk all three of us over to the bathroom so Jungkook can do just that as well as wash Juni's hands off.

"Wow!" is the first word that comes out of her mouth when we walk into the butterfly themed bedroom, mesmerizing her from the first glance. "Your room is so pretty!" she says, quickly running around here and there, being careful not to get too close since we haven't gotten a chance to change her dress yet.

"You like it?" I question and she's quick to nod her head again. "I wish my room looked like this" she says, spying all of the little butterfly details from the dainty embroidering on the bedspread to the knobs on the dresser, all of them working in harmony.

"We can go look for some butterfly stuff next time we go to the store if you'd like" Jungkook says while he walks into the room and right up to her while she stares up at the ceiling where there are a couple scattered across it. Nothing is too over the top but there is clearly a theme going on that she is captivated by.

"Really?" she asks, confirmation of what he's said being important to make sure she's hear him right. "Promise" he says holding out his pinky that she quickly wraps her's around as best as she can with her little ones being so tiny in comparison to his. She looks at the two of us before beckoning Jungkook to come closer so she can whisper something in his ear.

"Can the pretty lady come with us too?" she 'whispers' in his ear almost as loud as her speaking voice and I try to hold back my laughter, pretending like I didn't hear a thing. "Why don't you ask her?" he whispers and when he leans back she looks him in the eyes and he nods to further encourage her.

"Um, would you like to go shopping with us to get butterflies for my room too?" she asks, walking up to me shyly. Jungkook looks at me with a soft smile and I notice how the tips of his ears have almost gotten a little pink, his expression soft and charming but his body still showing tell tale signs of nervousness.

"Sure Juni, I'd love to go shopping with you" I say and she giggles in response while running back to her Daddy. "Can we go right now?" she asks jumping up and down. "We'll go another time don't worry baby, we've gotta set up a time so the pretty lady can go with us too right?" he reminds her and although she's sad she has to wait she nods in agreement. "Good, now let's get you out of this so we can make you all nice and clean again" he says, unzipping the back of her dress and revealing the cute little white tank top and tights that she wore under it.

I focus my attention on opening up the closet and grabbing a couple of dresses out for her to choose from. "These ones should fit. Which one would you like to wear Juni?" I say and her eyes flitter back and forth between all of them before giving her a Daddy a devious smile and hugging them to her chest. "I want all of them" she giggles and my heart melts, thinking about how fun it would be if I had a daughter just like her.

"Pick one Juni" Jungkook chuckles and she pulls back flipping through the selection I've made before her eyes light up and find the one she's dying to wear. "This one, this one!" she says, lightly holding onto the skirt and jumping up and down. I shift my grasp on them and hold out the one she chose for Jungkook to take and once he does there a static jolt of electricity that shocks us leaving the both of us pulling away slightly.

"Sorry it's probably from all the fabric of the dresses" I explain and he smiles in response. "Don't worry about it. A little spark never hurt anyone" he says and it's almost as if his voice had dropped a bit with that remark, leaving me widening my eyes a bit before turning back around and placing the dresses back in the closet. 

Why does he make me so nervous?

"Lady, lady look!" I hear from behind, and watch as Juni turns this way and that once Jungkook has finished putting the dress on her. "My goodness Juni don't you look adorable!" I say and she runs up to the the mirror in the corner of the room, watching the skirt swish this way and that. "Say thank you Ms y/n" Jungkook says, correcting Juni and finally telling her my name. She sounded too cute calling me 'the pretty lady' I just didn't have the heart to tell her otherwise.

"Thank you Ms y/n!" she says, running up to me and wrapping her arms around my legs since she is still  too small to reach anywhere else. "You're welcome Juni" I say, smiling down at her and smoothing her hair down. "Remember Juni, we're just borrowing it so we can wash your dress. We have to give it back to Ms. y/n before we leave" Jungkook says and I can see her excitement dwindle a bit but is no less thankful for being able to wear it tonight.

"Thank you for letting me borrow it Ms. y/n!" she says and I smile again, falling more and more in love with this adorable little girl with every smile she graces me with. "You're welcome" I say and she lets go of me and twirls around in it before stopping.

"Oh! I promise to be really careful and keep this one clean" she says holding out her pinky to do just as she had done with her father moments ago and I kneel down to her level and do just that before booping her on the nose causing another fit of giggles to spill out of her.

"Y/n, dinner is ready" my mother says while poking her head around the corner and I can tell she is completely satisfied by the scene that she's walked in on. "Oh Juni what a beautiful dress!" my mother says, noticing it right away, remembering it was one of my favorites. "Ms y/n gave it to me!" she says, swishing around in it again before doing a full twirl for us.

"Well aren't you the most darling little girl I've ever seen! Are you ready to eat? I heard that mashed potatoes are one of your favorite foods right?" my mom says, holding out her hand for Juni to take and she gladly does.

"Did my grandma tell you that?" she asks, clearly surprised that this complete stranger already knew something about her. "Yes she did. I hope you like them!" my mom says and Juni rushes down the hallway dragging my mom behind her. "Juni be careful!" Jungkook calls out to her but my mom just laughs it off.

"Why don't you show Jungkook where the laundry room is so you can put her dress in the washer" my mom offers up and I nod my head and look up at him. "That's okay I can just wash it when we get home" he says, politely declining the offer. "It's alright, it's best to wash it right away so it doesn't stain" I say, holding out my hand for the dress and he smiles before handing it to me and following my lead.

"You have a lovely home" he says shyly, looking this way and that taking notice of the small details just as Juni did. 'Like father like daughter' I think to myself. "It was my childhood home as you could probably tell from my old room" I say and he hums in response as I stop at the door to the laundry room.

"I know Juni is never going to stop talking about it" he chuckles and I smile at the loving tone that is always present in his voice whenever he speaks about her. We stand there in silence for a bit while I gather the various cleaning products I'll need.

"If you like, I can show you how to get stains like this out? If there was ever a day when I was her age that I didn't get some sort of dirt, mud or grass stains on my clothes my mother would write that down as a national holiday" I say and he laughs at that before accepting the offer.

"Sure, I'd like that" for some reason I can't seem to find the right words so I simply turn around and rinse off the mud in the little sink we have in here. "Do you think you could get that one for me?" I ask, nodding toward one of the stain removers. He wordlessly does as I ask and helps apply a drop or two of it to each of the areas I point out.

"I could've done that" he says now realizing how he's just standing there watching me clean his daughter's dress. "No, that's okay I offered!" I say, reassuring him that I don't mind. I wordlessly ask for the next stain remover before rubbing it in and ringing out the excess water. He opens up the washer lid for me and I toss it in and look this way and that for the laundry detergent.

"Looking for this?" he asks, pulling it off the shelf above the washer. "See, that's a perk of living on my own now. I don't have to worry about things being up too high for me anymore" I chuckle and quickly scoop in the appropriate amount and start the washer.

"Well let me know if you ever need anyone to get something that's out of your reach, it's one of the perks of being tall" he jokes and I laugh but almost shy away from the fact that he expects to see me again. "So I've heard" I say and try to put the detergent back on my own but it soon tips back over and is close to crashing down until he catches it, which in turn ends with him trapping me between him and the washer.

He slides the detergent back in it's spot and takes half a step back, giving me the smallest bit of space. "Why didn't you let me help you? I was standing right here?" he asks, tilting his head at me. "I don't know, I guess I'm just used to doing things on my own now" I chuckle awkwardly. "Well hopefully you'll get used to letting me help you soon" he says, finally taking another step back and giving me a bit more space to breathe.

"Sorry about that" I apologize awkwardly, leaning my back against the washer now with him leaning up against the wall directly in front of me and giving me a crooked smile. "Don't apologize, there's nothing wrong with being independent" he says and quickly scans my body but he does it so fast that if I would've blinked I would've missed it.

"Daddy it's time for dinner" Juni says, her soft steps not having been heard by either of us over the sound of the washer, breaking us out of the little moment that we had been having. "Okay Juni we're coming" he chuckles and holds out his hand for her to take but she giggles and dodges it, reaching for mine instead.

I squeeze past Jungkook as this little room is only wide enough for one person to walk through and the front of our bodies brush up against each other only for a moment until she's tugged me halfway out the door. "Let's be a train Daddy! Grab onto Ms. y/n's hand so you can be the caboose!" she says, turning this trip down the hallway into a game.

"Oh that's okay sweetie why don't you-" he starts but I hold out my hand for him to take, him only having refused for my sake, not wanting to make me uncomfortable with any unwanted skinship. "Grab on Daddy!" Juni giggles and I look up at him and see that he's looking down at me. He chuckles before grabbing onto my hand and the both of us are soon trailing behind Juni as she drags us to the dining room.

Once we get to the dinner table Juni lets go of my hand and runs back to where Jungkook's mom is so she can continue to help her eat her mashed potatoes. 

When everyone notices that Jungkook and I have arrived, we're greeted with four sets of eyes, all of them extremely happy to see us. It's then when I realize that we were still holding hands so I gently slide mine out of his, almost wishing I didn't have to.

He looks down at where our hands had been connected when I do and I can almost see that he's also disappointed that I let go but his expression is quickly replaced by an awkward smile aimed at our parents. 

When I look at the table I see that Jungkook and I are meant to sit directly across from each other. Which I'm sure is another one of my mother's ploys to get us to keep glancing up at each other, this time though I don't really mind.

When I go to walk to one side to sit down next to Mr. Jeon, Jungkook follows right behind me. 

"Oh did you want to sit on this side?" I ask him and he shakes his head, "No, I just wanted to pull your chair out for you" he says and I feel butterflies in my stomach. "Oh, okay" I say quietly and watch as he does just that and slides the chair in behind me once I've sat down. "Thank you" I reply, smiling up at him and he does so in return before rounding the table to take a seat in his place.

"So y/n, your mother told us that you work in photography, is that right?" she asks and I take a drink of water before responding. "Well not really, I've done a few freelance jobs here and there. Enough to keep me afloat so to say but I hope to do it full time soon!" I say and I see Jungkook perk up at that.

"Jungkook has always loved photography as well! He's always been tinkering away with cameras since he was just a few years older than Juni" his mother says while Jungkook cleans off Juni's face as it seems like she's gotten more food on her face than in her mouth.

"What subject do you usually shoot?" I ask, curious to see where his interests lie. "Mostly editorial, but I tend to enjoy the shoots a lot more when they have to do with nature. I believe beauty can be found in almost anything so I tend to just capture whatever inspires me at the moment" he says, his answer being very similar to mine.

"I feel the same way" I respond simply before shying away from the topic as I feel our parents are studying our interaction.

Once they notice the silence they decide to pick up the conversation just throwing facts about Jungkook and I back and forth, pretty much doing the getting to know you game for us without giving us much room to get a word in edgewise. Which leaves the both of us to just follow the conversation and occasionally making eye contact when either side makes a slightly embarrassing comment.

"Hey Dad" Jungkook calls out to his father over the never ending conversation they're having about us. "How's that new project at work going?" he says and I can already tell that it's one of those kinds of topics that once you get him started on it he won't stop and that's just the case as we now watch the conversation take a turn that is thankfully so far off from the two of us.

As time ticks by and the subjects change a few more times I notice that Jungkook has started to get up and clear the table to which I jump up in response to help him.

"Oh Jungkook don't worry about that I can do it later" my mother says but he shakes his head. "It's the least I could do after you've provided this wonderful dinner for my family and I" he says and I can almost see my mother swooning from his response. "Well thank you very much, sweetie can you show him where to place them, just next to the sink is fine" she says to me and I nod, looking up at him and nodding my head towards the direction of the kitchen.

Once we've gone there and back from the table a few times I decide to just start loading up the dishwasher, trying to escape that mortifying conversation for as long as I can. "I brought your glass for you. Wasn't sure if you were planning to finish it or not" he says, walking over and placing my wine glass on the counter next to me. "Thanks" I say quietly, neither of us having said a word to each other since the very beginning of that dinner.

"Your parents are really sweet" he says, breaking the ice and clearly acknowledging how obvious they all were about their motives. "Yours too. I'm sorry about tonight" I say and his brows furrow, clearly not understanding why I would need to apologize. "I knew my mom would end up doing something like this but once her mind is made up there's no stopping her" I admit and he gives me a crooked smile in response.

"Don't worry, I knew what all of them were up to too. My mother was praising you so much and telling me how beautiful and smart and respectful you are so I had an inkling that this was their plan all along" he says and I turn away from him, trying to hide my flustered expression.

"She's right you know" he says, coming around to stand next to me, leaning against the counter while I face it, cleaning up the inside of the sink and grabbing the towel next to me to dry my hands.

"Right about what?" I question, now turning to face him and noticing just how close he's gotten. "About how beautiful you are" he says and I have to blink a few times, trying to figure out why this incredibly handsome man in my kitchen is flirting with me.

I just wanna thank past me because whatever I did in my last life must've been incredible if I'm being offered up a man as remarkable as he is.

"I-" I start but am soon interrupted by my mom walking in on us. "Y/n could you- oh! I'm sorry, as you were" she says, taking small backward steps out of the kitchen, keeping hers eyes on the two of us before turning around to walk back to the living room that they had moved to.

"I'm sorry about her" I say, taking a drink of my wine but he laughs it off. "It's alright, I don't mind" he says watching me with curious eyes as I polish off the rest of it. "Juni has taken a real liking to you" he says and my heart melts at the sound of her name.

"Really? She's probably the happiest child I've ever seen. I really like her too" I say and he smiles, no doubts memories over the years flashing through his head.

"You've done a really good job raising her Jungkook" I say, and his eyes flutter back to mine, this time being the first time I've spoken his name and it looks as if just that alone brought him so much satisfaction. "Thank you y/n" he says, and I feel my heart flutter, the deep baritone of his voice sending a shiver down my spine.

"Daddy can I have some cake?" we hear as Juni walks into the kitchen, "Can I have some cake..." Jungkook says, trailing off and waiting for those magic words. "Please?" she says, realizing what he had been getting at.

"Sure baby, Ms. y/n and I will bring it out in a second okay?" he says making her smile as she runs out of the kitchen "Thank you" she calls out over her shoulder leaving the two of us laughing at her enthusiasm.

"That's probably what my mom was coming in to ask us for" I say and he nods in agreement, helping me carry everything out so we can all have a slice of the small cake my mom had gotten for tonight. "How much you want to bet that they sent Juni looking for us earlier too?" he whispers to me as we make our way over to where everyone else has gathered. "You might be right about that one" I whisper back, quickly catching onto all of their little games.

After setting the cake and all of the plates and forks down on the coffee table my mom takes on the task of cutting it up and serving it, with the very first piece going to little Miss Juni. "Thank you!" she says, eyes wide as saucers leaving all of us cooing at her. "Eat slow Juni" Jungkook reminds her, no doubt having troubles with her eating her desserts too quickly.

I take on the task of helping my mother hand out the slices and once I give one to Jungkook I finally notice that the only empty seat is right next to him and he looks down at it before looking back up at me in a silent invitation to sit down and I take it cautiously.

The couch that we're sitting on is kind of a love seat ironically, seeing as the whole theme of tonight is trying to set us up with each other.

Once I've sat down I realize that I've sat right next to him to the point of where my shoulder ended up bumping into his. "Oh! I'm sorry" I say, scooting away from him but with the size of the couch I don't really end up moving all that much. "It's okay I don't mind" he says, before taking a bite of his cake and turning to face the rest of the group.

The seven of us continue talking and talking until we notice that Juni has fallen asleep in her grandma's lap. "Here mom let me take her" Jungkook says, standing up but both my mom and his stand up and wave him off. "That's okay, we're just gonna go put her down in y/n's room" my mom says and before he's able to say otherwise they've disappeared down the hallway.

"Does she have school tomorrow?" I ask once he's settled back down. "No, she's on spring break right now until next Monday" he relays and I nod my head. "And what about you? Do you work tomorrow?" I ask and he gives me a shy smile before responding. "I had a shoot scheduled in the morning but we went ahead and pushed it to the afternoon so I don't have to worry about going home anytime soon" he says and my heart skips a beat.

"No, I mean, well I don't want to keep you for too long. You probably have other things you'd like to get done tonight?" I ask and he shakes his head. "No, this is the only thing I have planned for the night so I guess you're stuck with me" he chuckles. "I didn't mean to make you feel like I wanted you to leave I just-"

"It's okay I know what you meant" he laughs and I now take notice that we're the only ones left in the room. "Oh! Where did my dad go?" I ask, my eyes darting this way and that, not even being able to hear his voice.

"I think I heard something about them setting up the fire pit? I'm not sure but he's outside with my dad right now" he says and I spy both of them looking through the glass door before quickly ducking out of view once they realize they've been spotted.

"Maybe we should head out there" I say but he cuts off that thought by asking me a question that keeps me frozen on the spot. 

"Is there a reason why you don't want to be alone with me?" he asks, arm now having been draped around the back of the couch a while ago, completely unknown to me making this all seem a lot more intimate than before.

"Who said that?" I chuckle nervously, clearing my throat before sinking back into my seat. "You just did" he says, nodding towards me and I feel like I want to crawl in a hole and die. I thought I could escape this night without being awkward like this but I guess not.

"You trying to get rid of me?" he teases and I shake my head right away, "No I'm sorry I just-" "It's okay, I'm only joking" he says and I laugh nervously. "So why don't you tell me about yourself?" he says, giving me the most open ended question ever and I scramble to find something but I just can't seem to come up with anything interesting enough to mention.

"Well, my parents pretty much said everything there is to know about me over dinner earlier" I say and he shakes his head. "I want to hear something about you from you. Like what are some of your hope, your dreams, something you're passionate about" he says, being a little more specific this time.

"My dreams?" I trail off, thinking for a second and he watches me as I wrack my brain for something notable. "It's kind of silly" I admit once I've settled on something. "Good thing I've got a sense of humor" he replies, trying to encourage me to continue. 

"Well, I've always wanted one of my photos to be on the cover of TIME magazine" I admit and see his eyes light up. "I have a similar dream" he says and my eyes widen in surprise turning my body to face him, wordlessly asking him to share his too. 

"I'd like one of mine to end up on the cover of National Geographic" he relays and I smile in turn. "That would be perfect for you! Well, since the subject you love to capture the most is nature I could definitely see your work fitting right in!" I say, excited to see someone else who's trying to aim as high as I am.

"And I could see yours being a shoe in for TIME as well" he says, and I shy away from his praise. "Okay and what's something you're passionate about, and don't say photography" he says, interrupting me causing me to slump down, having to take another second to come up with an answer. 

He chuckles a bit at my reaction and I glare at him causing him to smile at me even more so look up to the celling as if it had the answers to something interesting about me. 

"Well, I really love reading. I know it might not seem like a passion but when I read a really good book and I find someone who has read it or will at least let me talk about it it's as if I gain a boost of energy and can't contain my excitement. That's definitely the nerdy side of me showing but that's all I can really think of at the moment" I say honestly and when I look back at him it's as if he thought I was the most fascinating thing he's ever seen. 

"Sorry, I think I got a little carried away there" I say, getting shy from being looked at like that, his soft gaze an expression I'm not used to, especially from someone I just met. "Um, your turn" I say, hoping to get some of the spotlight off of me. 

"I know this might be cheating but I do enjoy taking video and editing them. Even if it were as simple as filming Juni for an afternoon, it's something that if given the chance, would be something I could be extremely passionate about" he says and although it is cheating since it's somewhat similar to photography, I'll let it slide. 

"Have you thought about switching up your profession to include video as well as pictures?" I ask and he nods before answering. "I have but I haven't taken enough time to seriously consider it. Juni is still young and I want to make sure I have a stable income in order to take care of her and if I'm being honest I feel almost as if a career change could jeopardize that" he says and I watch him with the same intent that he had given me and he too seems to shy away from it. 

"It's silly since it would probably be a seamless transition but I can't help but feel reservations towards it" he says and I place my hand on top of his that's in his lap. 

"It's normal for a parent to worry about providing for their child. I don't think it's silly at all and it shows how much you truly care about Juni and her well being. She's lucky to have you as her father" I say and he cringes only for a moment before his expression goes back to a softer one. I want to ask what would've warranted a reaction like that but I leave it alone. 

"Okay your turn, what is something you hope for?" he asks and I already know the answer to it but I'm hesitant to say. I take a second to try and figure out how to formulate it properly but decide to just go for it. 

"I hope to be a mother and have children of my own someday. Doesn't matter if it's naturally or through adoption, I just hope to have someone I can love and care for unconditionally and watch them as they grow and change and pray I'll receive that love and care back from them" I say and he gives me a wary expression and I quickly try to backtrack, not knowing if I've messed up or not. 

"I'm sorry that was probably extremely insensitive of me" I say, pulling away my hand but he holds onto it and gives me a sad smile before responding. "I think you would be a wonderful mother. If you were to give your children even half the time and attention you've given to Juni today they would still be incredibly lucky to call you their mother" he says, reassuring me that it's okay to talk about these topics around him. 

"Last one?" I question, seeing if he's up to telling me something he's hopeful for. "I just hope that no matter what my family and friends stay happy and healthy. It might be simple but I enjoy the simple things in life" he says and I smile, seeing how truly kind and compassionate he is just from his simple answer. "That's a good answer" I say and we both chuckle a bit before we're broken out of yet again another moment by the sound of our mothers stumbling into the room. 

"Oh don't let us bother you we're just going to head outside with your father" Jungkook's mom says to him and I can see now from the warm glow shining through the glass door that they've finally started up the fire pit. 

"Oh we'll come outside too!" I say and try to get up off the loveseat. I'm able to stand but immediately lose my balance and feel a strong set of hands on my hips and end up falling into Jungkook's lap. "I-" I start, turning towards him and trying to get out an apology but stop short when I see how close his face is to mine, our noses almost touching. 

I hear our mothers head outside quickly and close the door but neither of us pay any mind, both focused on each other to the point where neither of us move for what feels like forever but was only a matter of seconds. When I do try to get up I feel his grip on me tighten. 

"I'm s-sorry, this couch is always difficult to get off of" I explain and he smiles. "Like I said before, you have nothing to apologize for" he says, his voice a bit deeper than before and it takes every fiber of my being to stop myself from looking at his lips but when I see his flutter down to mine I can't help but do the same. 

"Daddy, why is Ms. y/n sitting on your lap?" we hear Juni say and I immediately get off of him and throw my face in my hands, trying to hide the embarrassment written all over me but Jungkook handles it like a champ. 

"Ms. y/n just fell down Juni and I caught her. You know how I catch you sometimes before you fall?" he offers and she walks over to us, rubbing her eyes and immediately climbing onto Jungkook's lap. "Oh okay" she says, yawning again after Jungkook places a kiss on the crown of her head. 

"Do you wanna go see the fire that grandpa and Ms. y/n's dad made?" he asks and she hums in approval, still half asleep but wanting to go outside with everyone. "Okay let's go" he says, standing up with Juni in one arm and holding his hand out to help me up. I glare up at him and he smiles, knowing he's added to my embarrassment but I take his hand anyways and he makes no moves to let go once I'm up on my feet, walking us all towards the back door. 

Once we're outside though that's when he lets go so he can hold Juni properly while he walks down the patio steps so we can get to the fire pit. 

"Juni woke up?" his mother asks and Jungkook nods. "Yeah she wanted to come outside with everyone even though she is still very very sleepy" he says, talking in a silly sweet voice that makes Juni pout although her eyes are still closed. "I'm not sleepy" she says mid yawn causing me to coo at her and when she realizes I'm still close by she sits up off of Jungkook's chest and reaches towards me. 

I look between her and Jungkook for a second and he nods his head in approval and hands her to me, grabbing a chair afterwards for me to sit on and pulling up another one next to mine and looks over at Juni to see she's practically sound asleep again. "Are you okay with her?" he asks and I hum in approval leaving him placing another kiss on Juni's head before leaning back in his chair. 

"So Jungkook, what do you think of my daughter?" my mother asks and Jungkook chokes on air, not expecting the straightforward question. "Mom!" I scold and she chuckles, "What? It's a simple question. No need to give a complex answer, unless he wants to" she teases and I swear I can even hear Jungkook's dad chuckling at my mother's antics. 

They couldn't make it more obvious that they're trying to set us up even if they tried. 

My dad luckily somewhat comes to Jungkook's aide and hands him a bottle of water to hopefully help him stop coughing which it does thankfully.

He takes a second to clear his throat and I would be lying if I said I wasn't on edge, waiting to hear what his answer might be. "I think she is a very kind hearted and very intelligent young woman" he says simply and the echos of him calling me beautiful earlier on tonight attach to the end of that. 

"And would you like to see her again?" she continues and he then looks over at me, giving me a soft smile and glancing down at Juni before looking me in the eyes again. "We've already planned to see each other again" he says, memories of Juni's invitation to the butterfly shopping trip fluttering through my mind again. 

"Did you hear that? Jungkook has already asked to see her again" my mom says, calling over to Jungkook's mom as if she hadn't been listening the whole time. "Well technically Juni asked if I could go shopping with them" I explain and Jungkook chuckles. "Juni is a very smart girl" my mother compliments and Jungkook and I can't help but laugh. 

The rest of the night flies by and before I know it we're already standing in the doorway saying goodbye. "It's was so nice seeing you again y/n! I hope to be seeing you again soon" Jungkook mom says, winking at me. "Oh come on honey leave the girl alone" Jungkook's dad says, coming to my aide and saying his goodbyes as well. 

Jungkook's parents say a quick goodbye to Jungkook and Juni as well since they came in separate cars and I notice after that my dad pulls Jungkook aside and says something that I regretfully can't make out. Luckily he doesn't seem bothered by it as they smile and shake hands before my dad pats him on the back, sending him off with I can only assume is well wishes. 

Jungkook says goodbye to my mother and I can tell how much she's praising him, he thanks her for everything and makes his way over to me a few moments later and it's almost as if it was a ghost town with only Jungkook and I in the entryway now, with him holding a still very sleepy Juni in his arms. 

"Thank you for coming, I know this was probably a lot for you" I say, rocking back and forth on my heels and he smiles before answering. "I had fun, and I know Juni did too" he says and I can feel my heart skip a beat, "I did too" I reply shyly. He reaches into his pocket and unlocks his phone before handing it to me.

"Do you think I could have your number? You know, so we can set up that shopping day soon? I know Juni won't be able to stop talking about it until we go" he says, turning into what I could only describe as a shy teenage boy, asking his crush for her number. "Sure" I say, putting it in and calling my number so I have his too. 

"Let me know when you get home safe" I say and place my hand on Juni's back and whisper a quick goodbye which regrettably stirs her awake and I mouth a quite sorry to Jungkook but he smiles in response. 

"Wanna say goodbye to Ms. y/n?" Jungkook asks and she nods her head before opening her eyes and leaning towards me to give me a kiss on the cheek leaving me speechless. "Goodnight pretty lady" she mumbles before laying back down on Jungkook's chest. He chuckles after seeing my reaction and gives Juni a kiss on her head in response. 

"Goodnight y/n" he whispers to me and I send him the same sentiment, walking him to the door and watching as he walks over to his car while he puts Juni in her carseat. He looks back to see if I'm still watching and smiles at me again before getting in his car and driving off. 

"So should I schedule an appointment with the caterers tomorrow or...?" I hear my mother say behind me, making me jump before taking a few steps back into the house and closing the door. "Very funny mom" I say, walking over to the living room and plopping down on the couch Jungkook and I had been sharing a couple hours ago. 

"What's wrong? He's a nice man isn't he? Plus his daughter seems like she loves you! Why don't you give it a shot?" she asks and I sigh, sinking further back into the couch. "I don't know, I just don't want to get my hopes up" I mumble and she sits next to me, placing a comforting hand on my thigh. "What makes you say that?" she asks curiously.

"It's almost as if he's too perfect. He's handsome, charming, charismatic, a great dad and I don't know, he just seems too good to be true" I admit and she nods her head, understanding my hesitation. "Everyone puts their best foot forward when they're meeting someone for the first time. Just go out with him and Juni in a few days and keep an open mind. It's not the fact that he has Juni that's holding you back right?" she questions, trying to figure out what exactly has got me doubting. 

"No not at all! If anything Juni is an added bonus" I say truthfully and she smiles at me. "Good, because I think she's already become very attached to you" she says and I nod my head. "Yeah I think I have too" I mumble and she claps her hands, jolting me out of my train of thought. 

"Now all we have to do is get a ring attached to that finger and the three of you can live happily ever after" she says, getting up to clean up the cake plates that sit on the coffee table in front of us. 

"Mom" I groan and she laughs, "I want some beautiful grandchildren and if that handsome young man can't help you give them to me then I don't know who could" she continues leaving me sighing, not bothering to argue back since she is definitely right about that one. 

I hear my phone chime in my purse moments later after I walk into my bedroom to gather up my things to go back home and see a message from an unknown number but check my call log and see that the numbers match up from when I called myself off Jungkook's phone. 

I quickly add him to my contacts before opening up our chat and see a short but sweet message from him. 

'Home safe and sound. Thanks for having us tonight. Hope to see you soon?' he sends with a question mark at the end, clearly still wanting to double check on if I'll actually want to see them again. I wait a few seconds, my thumbs hovering over the keyboard before finally composing a message and hitting send before I chicken out. 

'See you soon Jungkook. I really enjoyed getting to know you and Juni. Looking forward to shopping for butterflies together!' I say and cringe once I reread it. 'Ugh could I possibly sound more desperate?' I say to myself and toss my phone on the bed, sitting down at the computer chair across from it. 

A minute later I hear another message come in and I practically lunge for the phone, praying I didn't weird him out but moments later I feel heat rushing to my cheeks and have to will myself into not squealing.

'We're counting down the minutes until we can see you again. Let's talk tomorrow and set up a date and time'  he says and I rush to respond. 

'Sounds great! Goodnight Jungkook'  I say, ending the conversation before I end up embarrassing myself even more but before I can even lock my phone his message pops up. 

'Goodnight y/n, sweet dreams' the message is so simple but it still makes me smile. 

"Is that Jungkook texting you?" my mom asks, poking her head into the room and I quickly lock my phone and grab my purse. "Yes it is, goodnight mom" I say, walking past her and straight to the front door with her trailing after me. "Oh come on sweetie you know I'm just teasing you. I really think he's going to be a good match for you" she says and I turn to face her before I leave. 

"I really hope so. Say goodnight to dad for me" I say giving her a kiss on the cheek and getting in my car to drive home. 

~~~~

Once I walk in I'm greeted again by Salem and he walks up, waiting for me to pick him up. "You're such a little baby you know that?" I chuckle and he meows in response. 

I follow the same routine as I always do, carrying him with me into my room and rambling off to him about my day before hopping in the shower but this time I have a lot more to say, leaving me wasting half the hot water and causing me to have to finish up the last bit of my shower in a freezing cold stream. 

After finishing up and finally settling into bed I lay down and Salem curls up next to me. "Things might be changing around here boy. I only hope they're for the better, what do you think?" I ask after having told him everything and I'm met with the feeling of him purring and if that isn't a good sign then I don't know what is. 

"I hope he likes cats" I say, giving him one last pet before turning off the light and for the first time in a very long time I can finally say I've gone to sleep feeling content. The last thought that runs through my head is one that helps me fall asleep with a soft smile on my face. 

I can't wait to see him again...

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[httpsryu]

muse? pt. 4

pairing: kang haerin x fem newjeans!reader

summary: getting a new member way long after debut and before a comeback isn't really the best idea to haerin

category: enemies-to-lovers (?), kpop idol au

genre: slow burn, angst, and fluff

warnings: a bit frustrating and A LOT of jealousy

a/n: i appreciate all the love muse has gotten so far! tysm everyone :)

With a small sigh, you proceed to walk into the dressing room, following your hair and makeup stylists. Seeing the fellow '06 liner, you can't help but to already roll your eyes knowing she's probably going to say some remark to you. 

"I would think you've gotten lost or something." Haerin immediately starts upon seeing you at the doorway. 

Huddling the already soaked towel around your frame, you can't help but chatter your teeth. "I think I'm knowing my way around this building since we were here pretty early." 

"Hmm. Good for you." Haerin shuts her eyes for the makeup artist to do her eye makeup. 

You can't help but to let out another very obvious eye roll at the other. 

"Y/N-shi, inside the changing room, there's a new outfit for you to change into." Your makeup stylist says, handing you another warm towel to which you immediately reach out for.

You bow at the older lady, thanking her with a smile before disappearing off into the changing room.

Haerin watches through the mirror, the door closing. She's still thinking about how there was a glowing energy around you, you're a different vibe when it comes to work.

However, Haerin will never admit that. Never in her life.

"Y/N-shi did amazing today." Haerin's stylist starts to talk to the other stylist. "I was so amazed at how well she grasped the cameras!"

"She used to be in a pre-debut show with other SM trainees." The other said, getting your seat ready and making it comfortable for you. "I heard that Min Hee-Jin wanted to bring Y/N with her after leaving SM but the other upper people didn't let her."

Haerin goes on her phone, pretending to not "care" about whatever the two pretty unnies are gossiping about.

"Really?!"

"Yes! She practically grew up in Min Hee-Jin's arms." The other explains, looking over and making sure each makeup product is sitting on the makeup table. "Apparently, not only did she grew up in Min Hee-Jin's arms but also in Yoo Young Jin's arms, he only trains the special trainees."

The cat-like female controls herself from rolling her eyes; yet again. Everyone is praising you for being this special star but why has Haerin not seen it yet? This supposed star that Min Hee-Jin went through lengths of bringing over here messes up the easiest part of the choreography?

Haerin doesn't get it; she really doesn't.

It pisses her off even more.

And because it pisses her off, something in her is intrigued by you.

"Unnie?" You call out from the changing room.

Haerin's stylist cannot help but to let out a small 'awe' at the tone of your voice.

"Yes, Y/N-shi?" Your stylist responds, coming over to stand in front of the changing room. "Is everything okay?"

You immediately panic at that statement, looking over in the mirror at the small rip in your dress. Only the second day of being in the group and you've already ruined a dress.

"Something happened to the dress."

"What's wrong?"

You opened the door slowly, peeking your head out with a derpy smile. "There's a rip in the dress."

"Let me see?"

With some shyness in the steps of your feet, you walk out the changing room.

Haerin almost feels her breath hitch at the sight of you in the mirror, her eyes looked at you, trailing from head to toe. Somehow, just somehow you manage to look stunning with wet hair and the "ripped" dress.

Wow.

This doesn't get past the pretty unnie who just finished up the last final touches of both Haerin's hair and makeup. She lets out a silent giggle at how cute the two groupmates are.

"Hmm, we don't have any backup dresses but..I think we can work with this somehow." Your stylist thinks, rushing out the room.

"Haerin-shi, take care of Y/N-shi. We'll be right back shortly." Haerin's stylist says before shortly following the other out in need of aid.

The feline-like female sighs once again. "You cause trouble everywhere you go."

"Here we go again.." You shake your head in astonishment, genuinely surprised at how someone could ruin the mood SO FAST. "Let me give you a word of advice. you should change your personality. no one would ever like someone who’s fussy and sensitive.”

Haerin snaps her head to turn at you. “I won’t ever ask you to like me, so don’t worry.” 

“Who says I'm worried? Stick close to your words, Haerin."

Haerin could only stare back at you, blinking blankly. She opens her mouth to say something but nothing ends up coming out of her mouth. She lets out a huff silently before turning back around and paying attention to her phone.

"Always trying to start something." You grumble under your tone, which does NOT go pass the cat-eyed female.

Haerin is starting to feel ticked off.

First, she had to wake up early in the morning to do a reshoot for the album (keep in mind that these photos were taken a couple months ago). Second, as if the company wanted to torture her enough, she got assigned with you for the duo shoots (which wasn't even a thing til now because of six members). Lastly, you just LOVE to mumble stuff knowing that she can hear.

Before Haerin could say anything, the two stylists enter the dressing room with various of ribbons and different fabrics to layer over the slight tear.

"Y/N-shi, you can help in the decision of which one looks well with the dress."

The cat-eyed female is a bit curious, so she constantly darts her pupils back and fourth with the screen of her phone and the reflection of you and the two pretty older ladies through the mirror. And somehow, Haerin's eyes focuses on you more than her phone.

Your stylist holds up a pretty piece of pale pink lace and Haerin feels her throat dry up in the back at how pretty the pink looks against you.

"Haerin-shi, what do you think?" Haerin's stylist questions, smiling a bit too wide.

You look up at your group mate in anticipation on what she'll say.

"It's pretty."

The oldest member watches the couple shoot between Haerin and you with her arms crossed in dissatisfaction. Anyone could tell that Haerin and you don't get along like the others.

"Haerin-shi, could we have you whispering something in Y/N-shi's ears? Like you're telling her a secret only for the two of you." The director suggests, hoping the shot will turn out beautiful like the how the others did.

You can't help but to feel a sense of electricity at how close the two of you are.

Haerin fights her eye roll back, scooting a bit more closer towards you and she holds up her hand besides your ear. She slowly moves her face to your ear, she's a bit nervous and uncomfortable with how close this is.

"Y/N-shi, could you tilt your head towards Haerin-shi a bit more?"

Listening to the directions given to you, you move a bit too close but a butterfly leads you to move a bit too far to where Haerin accidentally kisses your cheek. Both girls turn pink at the sudden contact, looking shy afterwards.

What just happened?

However, this shot comes out perfect.

Minji smiles in satisfaction, pushing down the bitter taste in the back of her mouth.

"No fair!" Hanni protests, sitting down on the picnic blanket in a tantrum-like manner as she watches with envy at Haerin and you.

Danielle could only pat the back of her group mate while she too holds back the bitter taste in the back of her throat with a pout.

Hyein can only shake her head at the way the others are acting. "They are so down bad."

Both Haerin and you pull apart immediately after the accidental kiss.

"S-sorry." You apologize, playing with the grass in your hands while looking down to avoid looking at her.

She clears her throat, rubbing the back of her nape in embarrassment. "It's whatever."

Another shot came out perfect.

"They're naturals at this." Your manager views the photos, impressed with how they're looking so far.

The director and staff all nod in agreement at how the two of you look so perfectly paired up.

"There's something in your hair." Haerin points out, prompting you to look up as you brush your hand through your hair. "No, it's there. Careful, you might take off your headpiece."

"Here?"

The feline-like female lets out a small silent laugh, bringing her hand up to fix the falling elf-ears. Fixing your hair afterwards.

"Thanks."

She hums in response.

"Oh! Haerin is so going to get it for trying to get to MY woman!" Hanni fists the blanket in her hand in frustration.

Being in the van close to midnight is a nightmare for the girls. All they want to do is eat and go to bed. Yet, here they are. Stuck in traffic on the busiest road in Seoul.

"Unnie, I'm so hungry." Hyein whines to Danielle, laying her head down on the older's shoulders.

Danielle could only pat the youngest's head to console her. "We'll be home soon."

Haerin looks from the rear view's mirror of the van from her seat, noticing you asleep. Minji, being the oldest she is, besides you as she keeps trying to protect your head from falling into the windows.

Wait; did she just put your head on her shoulders?

"OMG NO!" Hanni whisper-shouts, looking at her ex-roommate in frustration. "Minji is making moves on MY Y/N."

There goes the Vietnamese's delusions again. Haerin wants to just roll her eyes at the way Hanni keeps claiming you as hers. Since when were you a property?

"She sleeps so peacefully." Danielle softly speaks, looking over at you with pureness in her eyes. Oh, how she wishes you were the one laying on her shoulder.

Hyein fights back a giggle at the way everyone is acting.

"She's my roommate at the end of the day." Haerin flatly says, inserting her headphones in to not get bothered and bombarded questions about why she just said that.

Haerin doesn't know either.

Why does she feel the need to tell everyone that you're her roommate? Like why did she even bring it up?

Resting her head against the window, the cat-eyed girl couldn't help but to let her mind flashback to the accidental kiss. Her lips softly grazing against the plumpness of your cheeks. Haerin brings her fingers to her lips again and she can't help but to smile a little over the moment from earlier.

Realization seeps in and her smile drops, eyes blank as she returns back to her usual expression and shuts her eyes. Drowning herself in the music coming from her headphones and traveling into her ears. (in the back of her mind; she doesn't know why her stomach is feeling funny).

"I think Haerin thinks Y/N is cute." Hyein smiles at the others, gulping nervously at the three girls' expressions.

The bang-haired girl waves her hand, brushing it off. "Yeah right."

"No. I'm being serious." The youngest defends her case. "She just doesn't know it yet herself."

The oldest of the bunch shrugs carefully, not wanting to wake you up. "It's only been the 2nd day, who knows?"

"Come on~ everyone knows Y/N is quite cute." Danielle says, understanding Haerin. "And Haerin does like pretty girls."

Hanni rolls her eyes, covering her ears with her hands. "Stop. Stop. Stop. She's my pretty girl, though."

Hyein sarcastically shakes her head while sighing. "Y/N unnie is actually mines, so..."

The other three could only look at her, assuming that it may be a part of puberty.

Pacing back in and out of the shared bathroom in the room, Haerin wonders if she should wake you up to freshen up. Each time she walks out the bathroom, she's met with you peacefully sleeping and she doesn't dare wake you up with how content you look in your bed.

BUT, there's practice tomorrow! If anything, Haerin would not want you messing up tomorrow. AT ALL.

With full decision in her mind, she strides towards your sleeping figure.

"Hey. Wake up." She taps on your shoulder repeatedly. "We have practice tomorrow."

Opening your eyes tiredly, you're met with your member peering over you. And somehow in the dim light of the bedroom, she looks somehow angelic and not annoying like the past day. If only she looked like this all the time, perhaps you would be able to tolerate the introverted member.

Haerin's eyes widen at the sudden eye contact you and her both made, backing away.

"It's 2 in the morning, I figure you'd want to wash up before going back to bed." She rubs the back of her nape, looking at the ground. "We have practice tomorrow."

Letting out a small incoherent noise, ultimately, you listen to your roommate and sit up from the bed. "Thanks."

"You need to get better at knowing the schedules." The other states, walking back to her side of the room. "I may be your member but it's up to you whether you want this spot on the team or not."

Too out of energy to defend yourself, you let out a nod before vanishing into the bathroom. Leaving Haerin wondering why you didn't argue back with her.

Could everything be okay with you? Perhaps, was Haerin a bit mean to you? Not that she cared or anything.

She was only just warning her; she has no idea why you would be upset by her words. The cat-eyed girl shakes her head to forget all about it and keep her mind CLEAR from you. She DOES NOT want you to be the last thought in her head before going to bed.

That sounds like a definite nightmare.

Charging her phone, she places it on the bedside table before drowning herself into her covers. Shutting her eyes to get some rest for tomorrow's day, your face suddenly pops up.

The raven-haired female immediately opens her eyes in a frantic state. What the hell? She sits up, trying to process what just happened. Alarmed and frightened, she gets out of bed to walk out to the kitchen for some air.

Grabbing some water from the fridge, Haerin could only chug it down in hopes of being able to sleep and it was all just a fragment of imagination because she was EXTREMELY drained and over-worked.

"Rin?" Jihye comes walking down the halls to a rare sight of Haerin. "Everything alright?"

Haerin shuts the fridge, smiling at her best friend to not worry her. "Of course."

"How's Y/N? Is she sleeping well?" The Australian asks, walking over to grab a cup of milk. "I hope she's not too exhausted, she just got here and she's getting into all these schedules all of a sudden."

The other could only roll her eyes, agitated at how other other girls are worrying about you. After all, you're her roommate not THEIRS. So why does it matter that you end up being on her best friend's mind at the end of the night.

"After the concept photos, I think I saw her in a new light." Jihye shyly confesses, looking down at the cup of milk with a soft smile. "She's just so fresh, I don't know how to describe it."

"Do you have a crush on her or something?"

The curly-haired couldn't help but to giggle lightly. "Of course not."

That was the biggest lie Jihye could've ever said.

"Good."

prev. part ----- next. part

finally finally pt. 4 is up!!

taglist: @xszn , @airice , @nnewjeansstuff , @xeiinpain , @jiwoneric , @brocoliisscared , @ilamara , @linnnsworld , @gayforall , @lorsstar1st , @haechansbbg , @dhdhdjjf , @hyejin67 , @mushroom-main , @ilovekimminji , @justme-idle , @kyuusberry , @masuowo , @iraa567 , @shycreationdreamland , @idunnofr , @imahybridicannotbekilled , @twicesserafim, @awkwardtoafault 

[pigdemonart]

Battle Subway Depot Agents (by pig-demon)

When I made designs for these guys last year I didn’t really think they needed colored references/master post, but since then I’ve drawn them a lot! Also people have added them to their fanfics and drawn fanart! So I figured it was time I made a post for easy ref. :]

These designs are obviously free to use, just give credit (and link me your work if you're comfortable, because it makes me happy to see!) All I request is to stay respectful to their pronouns and skin colors, ya knooow… 👍 note: The pokemon on their cards are all companions, not the ones they use on the Battle Subway. Except Jackie...the litwicks are just there to fill space/give them company.

More info under cut:

Edit: Important disclaimer:

These are again my designs/interpretations for the agents. Please don’t treat them as canon or as the only, quintessential designs for these literal background npcs. Many people have done takes on them before and after me, even back in 2010. It feels silly to ask, but due to past experience, I ask that you please DONT hunt down anyone that does a different take on the depot agents!! 👍

Tags:

I'm gonna start tagging them individually, but for now all Depot Agent comics and art on this blog are tagged under Depot Agents.

Height chart:

I’m not too strict about heights, so I don’t really care about actual measurements. Here’s an approximation of what I tend to visualize though:

Sexualities/Gender Identities: I don't have official labels for each and every agent because I like keeping things fluid for characters to develop these traits on their own. However, as a queer person, I enjoy designing characters who are also queer, therefore I can safely say none of these characters are straight. The ones who are set in stone are Ramses (gay man), Cloud (lesbian woman,) Jackie (non-binary.) Furze uses he/they pronouns but their gender is undetermined. I also welcome anyone giving the agents a different gender identity to suit them (as long as it's done respectfully.)

Notes about each agent...

Cameron:

- Cameron dyes parts of his hair blonde and keeps other parts in black. This is because he is a big fan of Elesa and her fashion choices.  - Though there have been a few occasions to meet his idol, he is always way too nervous to approach her, feeling deep down that he'll mess up somehow. - He practices modeling poses in secret. He loves flourishes and flare, but is simply too insecure to put it on display. - Of his coworkers, he gets along the best with Furze. He's the easiest to talk to because Furze will do most of the talking. - Cameron is easily intimidated — even mean Pokémon can make him nervous. Though, his two worst fears are being left in a room alone with Jackie, and being left alone in a room with Isadore. - He takes advantage of his height to sometimes hide behind some of his coworkers. - Cameron is much better at Pokémon battles than he gives himself credit for. Emmet and Ingo were pleasantly surprised by this, since Cameron was promoted to fit a temporary role on the Battle Subway. They happily made him a permanent member when he proved himself capable. - His Dwebble (Pebby) is secretly very strong, and rushes to protect Cameron when it can. Cam sometimes thinks Pebby helps him feel more confident in himself too.  - If he stumbled into any of his coworkers outside of work, he would simply explode of embarrassment. - He is the youngest child and only son of his family. He lives in his own apartment in Nimbasa.

Cloud:

- Cloud (like Ramses) knew the twins when they were very young. - She used to be an ace trainer in her youth, even going so far to compete in the Pokémon league. Winning and becoming the champ was the most important part of her journey, but something happened along the way that changed that outlook. - It seems with age, her competitiveness has mellowed out. However, she maintains an intense energy when battling.  - Her favorite types are Psychic and Flying types. Swoobat (Sweetie) is her ace.  - Her favorite hobby is baking, and she often bakes sweets for the crew. She knows all their favorite flavors by now! - She prioritizes keeping a friendly relationship with all her coworkers and thinks of them fondly. She considers Ramses family after all the years of working together!  - She is a big fan of Brycen's movies and can recite the lines. - She lives with her wife in Anville. - Cloud loves doing maintenance work both at home and in Gear Station. She enjoys bringing her own tools and industrial flashlight.

Furze:

- Furze only has one volume setting (mid loud,) but he finds himself feeling right at home when talking to either one of the twins. - Furze has ADHD, and this is reflected in some of his habits, most visibly is his fidgeting when sitting still for too long. - He rides a bike to work every day. When he is late, Cloud clocks in for him so he doesn't get in trouble. - This is a kind of a guy that sits crouched gargoyle style on chairs. Only outside of work, of course. Bad posture could get him in trouble. - While working on the Battle Subway, there will be times Furze feels sorry for his opponents and offers to quietly let them pass anyways. This...has also gotten him in trouble. :[ - He went to the same elementary school as Isadore in Castelia. Though Isadore seems to have forgotten their short-lived acquaintance, Furze has not. This is part of the reason Furze claims they are in fact good friends!!! - Furze is the middle child of a big family. He lives with his mom and takes care of her, along with his many Darumakas and Darmanitan. All of his Pokemon have famous trains names. - He collects model trains. Naturally.

Isadore

- Isadore had plans to become the station master the moment he was hired as a depot agent, but alas... (sad trumpet sound.) - As a youth, he was more interested in science and engineering over Pokemon battles. He enjoys the strategizing aspect, at most. Not so much the competitiveness. - In addition, his Pokemon are all rescues and not used for battling. He's had his Watchog (Winston) since he was in his late teens. - His Electrode (Gregor) and Voltorb (Leonard) were rescued from the likes of Team Plasma. - Isadore admits he understands Pokemon better than humans. This has been apparent his whole life. - In spite of acting like a sitcom villain, Isadore cares about the management of Gear Station and the safety of the passengers to an incredible degree. He sees it as a personal life goal to assist in the management of Gear Station, as well as the success of the Battle Subway. - Though it pained him to become a subordinate to the twins, he begrudgingly accepts it for the greater good. - His almost militant efficiency certainly made up for his years of antagonizing the twins before they became the bosses. Ingo and Emmet understand this better than anyone. - Isadore keeps tabs on all of the staff members. So he very well knows all their birthdays and makes it a point to celebrate it. This is by no means a -happy- or -festive- event. It's just customary. - Like Furze, he was originally from Castelia, but now resides in Nimbasa. Isadore's only family is his mom and she lives in his childhood home with their Stoutland. - Isadore would have probably been voiced by every glasses guy ever J. Michael Tatum had he not already been cast as dear Emmet lmao

Jackie

- Jackie is a mystery and they like keeping it that way. When they talk, it's practically impossible to determine what is a lie or truth, especially if the subject is themselves or their background. - They love scaring Cameron the most and will ask to be paired with him whenever possible. They claim Cameron is their "favorite coworker," while Isadore is the least favorite. - It's plain to see why -- Jackie is the only one that doesn't passively tolerate Isadore's tirades. - Though my comics sometimes may allude to Jackie being a ghost/supernatural, this is not confirmed nor canon. I just personally enjoy toying with the concept. : ) That being said...

- Item #: SCP 7453

- Object Class: Euclid

- Special Containment Procedures: The ████ ██████ is ██████ within ████-██████. - Ingo and Emmet choose to not question anything about Jackie, since it's clear they're one of the more efficient workers. However it can be a safety concern... - Cloud and Ramses have worked with Jackie for a long time, though they've forgotten somehow. They believe Jackie is a new hire since they appear to be young. - Anyone trying to make sense of Jackie's employee records simply can't bring themselves to any conclusions. It's better to ignore the inconsistencies. - Jackie has never been seen to leave Gear Station. Jackie has never been seen in anything but their uniform. Jackie has never been confirmed to eat, drink or blink. Jackie knows your secrets. Jackie thinks it's... amusing.

Ramses

- Ramses sometimes misses having a full head of hair, but he thinks his signs of age make him look distinguished. (he is correct.) - Ramses is sort of the "mom friend," making sure everyone's concerns are heard, as well as trying to keep the peace whenever a conflict might arise. - If another coworker is feeling low, Ramses will try to cheer them up with a lighthearted joke or offer advice if they'd like it. - When the twins were promoted to bosses of the Battle Subway, Ramses cried because he felt so proud. - In most circumstances, he is a very simple and logical man. He is quick to find solutions and tries not to fret over the little stuff. It's not good for his heart after all. - His ace is his Pikachu (Musa,) though the mouse is more of a lap pet now. At home, he also has an Audino (Sara) and a Manectric (Nubi) who keep Ramses' husband company. His Klinklang (Moli) is the only one of his personal pokemon that accompany him to work nowadays. - Ramses considers Cloud family. They are best friends and love having family gatherings outside of work. They also gossip a lot, and don't mind when Jackie decides to join. - Ramses jokes about looking forward to retirement, but really doesn't want to leave until he is physically incapable of working anymore. Gear Station is like a second home to him.

In-Game Quotes

The most important reference of all are their in-game quotes, of course, so I'm adding it to the post. A lot of their personality traits can be extracted and interpreted from these few lines. And I personally love that about Pokemon NPCs -- there's a lot of room to explore and play with. Some appear very obvious. Cameron practically announces that he isn't ready for the battle that's about to ensue and seems genuinely surprised to win. Furze comes out the gate talking about the subject they actually care about, which is their job and their love for trains. The two of them are very easy to understand. Now, Ramses lines allude to a gentle and simple personality. He views himself with humility, and maybe even with a bit of humor comparing himself to a train and to his opponent to a station. If he loses he shows no signs of disappointment, he just accepts defeat with one last honest quip. It s also amusing to see the Depot Agents all use train metaphors to describe themselves since it falls in line with how Ingo and Emmet talk.

In comparison, Cloud does the same thing calling herself the terminal instead. Immediately, she is way more daring, though still keeping a sense of professionalism. To me, it's obvious she is competitive as she even admits she was expecting to win ("Ah...I didn't see it coming.") Jackie's lines are fun since it's up to interpretation if they are being literal or lying. It's almost like they are more interested in confusing/creeping out their opponent than actually beating them. To me, it gives off a mischievous vibe. Isadore's opener "There are only two roads in life." is a curious one because it almost feels like he is trying to be philosophical. Definitely a guy who views himself as an intellectual, regardless if that’s true or not. I like to think it's a saying he really believes in, and it applies to his life. The road he likes (long route) vs the road he hates (shortcut) -- fighting tooth and nail to become boss vs biting his tongue and accepting Ingo and Emmet as the Subway Masters.

Those are just my thoughts on how I write these characters. Please have fun playing with these lines too!

[readychilledwine]

Home to Me

Summary - After the death of Beron, Lucien is finally free to move to the Day Court, and he could not be more ecstatic to have you and Elain by his side

Warnings - moving anxiety, Helion being the best father in law, fluff

Prompt - Day 4 - Adventure

A/n - Happy @polyacotarweek! I was really excited to play with Elucien and a Spring Court reader. Something about them as a trouple with another flower girl makes my heart skip.

💕Poly+ACOTAR Week Masterlist💕

Freedom was a concept Lucien so rarely knew. From living under his father's thumb to Tamlin's command to Rhysand's control, it had always felt like a goal, some far-off dream he would never reach.

Until he met Elain, of course. Elain, as difficult as chasing her was, quickly became his light. He had made her chase him in return for the years of waiting, and she had fought tooth and nail for him. He had never met someone with so much love to give, and who wished to give it so freely.

Meeting you just made sense due to that. Elain had met you in Spring as they were helping Tamlin with rebuilds where you personally were in charge of the garden overhauls due to your powers. He would never forget the way Elain ran back into the house, sliding down the wall as she held her heart, and Briar rushed to her as she whispered "Mate," over and over again.

Lucien went to where she had been and stopped. Your kind was rare, but there you were, iridescent wings tucked on your back, shifting yourself to a smaller size to move pollen from flower to flower. “Ah, y/n,” Tamlin had admired you as Lucien did. “She will be fine with all of this. They are all used to marrying in pairs.”

Courting you had been the easiest thing both of them had ever done. Lucien had joked you were a simple female. You were wooed by shiny things, by chocolates left at your door late at night, by long walks through your garden. Elain adored you first, but Lucien fell in love the hardest. You were so kind, so gentle. He could hardly imagine life without you or Elain.

Now, 10 years later, that life could openly be a reality. He put the last of your boxes into the portal Helion had opened from your home in Spring to the home you three would share in Day, clapping his hands together as it closed.

Elain was already there, unpacking and decorating the home. She wanted it to feel as safe and loving as possible for you, seeing as you had never once left the Spring Court borders in your 300 years of life.

You were the most nervous of the 3, moving to Day was a lot to ask of you, but with Beron finally gone, Lucien was free to be with his dad, to be home, and you and Elain both wanted to give him this chance. He deserved it. He had earned it.

He found you in your garden, overlooking centuries of hard work, “Blossom, are you ready to go?” His heart almost sank as you quickly wiped your cheeks before turning.

“Of course!” The lie was so obvious it was almost insulting as he walked to you and took your upper arms in his large hands.

“You're frightened?” You could only nod. “Tamlin promised to care for the home. You will be back here every Autumn and Winter along with the honeybees and butterflies. Your garden will be fine, my love.”

“It's not the garden. This whole thing is just scary.” You both paused as the sound of winnowing came followed by Elain's soft footsteps.

“Tulip?” She ran the distance to you, tugging you into her while being mindful of your delicate wings. “My heart, what's wrong?”

Lucien answered for you, pulling you both to him. “She's a little scared of the move.”

Elain hummed, kissing away the tear that fell on to your cheek. “I can't imagine how hard it is, leaving behind all you've ever known by choice. You are so brave for our happiness. Your fear is so justified, y/n. I can understand that part, trust me.”

“If you want to stay,” Lucien's throat tightened at the thought. “We will make this work. We can-”

“No,” you sighed, heavily leaning into them. “I want to be with you. Both of you. This is just a whole new experience and a new world and a new high lord.”

“If I am what you are worried about, I am pleased to inform you there is nothing to be afraid of.”

Lucien looked down at you two, metal eye whirling as the other rolled. “Dad, we're having a moment here.”

“And I am joining. Come here, sweet pixie.” Lucien And Elain released you, allowing you to move to the Lord of Day. “I know your kind was hunted outside of this court, but I promise you, you and those precious wings will be safe in my home.”

That slow realization hit Elain and Lucien like bricks. They were asking you to leave Spring, a place your kind had been allowed to make a haven, and you had selflessly agreed. “Your new home is within the walls of my palace. No guards or guests will be able to get to you without my approval, and you will have your own guards approved by Lucien and Elain. You will be safe to fly and pollinate all you wish. My gardens could use that.” Helion kissed your hand where the rose gold and pink diamond ring sat. “Give Day a chance. Let it be your first big adventure.”

You nodded at him, letting your father in law take your hand. “My butterflies and bees are already there?”

“They are.”

"And they are happy?"

"They are dining on the most exotic pollen and nectars they have ever had. They were very excited about the move." Helion offered you a soft smile as Lucien and Elain both tugged the bond.

You turned to them, taking one last moment to memorize them in the archway of Wisteria and Roses. “Alright. I'm ready.”

General Taglist:

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Poly+ACOTAR Week Taglist:

@amara-moonlight @toporecall @littlestw01f @prettylittlewrites @anuttellaa @nayaniasworld @123345566

[estrellami-1]

The Easiest Thing (I’ve Ever Done)

Had an idea. I don’t know if it’s anything, or if it makes any sense, but I like it. I hope y’all do too!

The camera’s shaky, moving from Eddie trying to place his phone down, making sure to keep his face in frame. “Baby,” he sings, looking off-camera. “Would you peel me an orange?”

A slight pause before, “Hypothetical or literal?”

Eddie blinks. “Uh. Literal?”

“How many do you want?”

Eddie gapes. “Just- just like that? No teasing? Nothing about me being capable? Nothing at all?”

“It’s an orange, babe. ‘S not like me carrying you out of-”

Eddie scrambles for his phone, and the video cuts off.

It picks up again later. They’re in the living room now, and Eddie’s filming Steve, who had just asked him a question. “Say it again.”

“Say-?”

“The question you just asked me. Ask me again.”

Steve gestures to the TV. “We just watched 50 First Dates, Eds, I don’t think it’s crazy of me to ask if you’d do that for me.”

“Stevie. Baby. Light of my life. Look me in my eyes and ask me again. But before you do, think about two years ago when you got a concussion and the resulting short-term amnesia.”

Steve closes his eyes and leans his head back with a groan. “I’m an idiot.”

“Are not,” Eddie says hotly, and the video cuts off again.

It picks up again later. It’s dark in the room, and Eddie’s got his finger to his lips, as if he’s telling the audience to be quiet. “Say that again, baby?”

Steve mumbles something unintelligible, then, “The elephant’s back.”

“Yeah? What’s it doing?”

The camera moves to focus on Steve’s face. He’s clearly still asleep, even as he frowns. “He’s proposing. ‘S my job.”

“Your job?”

“Mhm. ‘M gonna do it.” Another frown. “Screw you, elephant.”

The camera jumps to Eddie, who’s got a hand covering his mouth. The video cuts off again.

It picks up again later. Eddie’s in the same position as the first part of the video. There’s background sounds—rushing water and clanking porcelain—that means Steve’s washing dishes.

“I feel like you’re mad at me.”

The clanking stops. The water shuts off. “What?”

Eddie shrugs. “You’ve been kinda tense ever since I got home.”

“Baby,” Steve whispers. “No. No, I’m not mad at you. I’m so sorry I made you feel that way. I’ve just got a lot in my head right now.”

Eddie nods. “Can I help?”

Steve hums. “You can listen.”

Eddie smiles. “I can do that.”

“Okay, cool.” The water turns back on. “So I was talking to Robin earlier-”

The video cuts off again.

It picks up again later. They’re back on the couch, but this time Steve’s engrossed in a book, lips silently moving as he reads. “Baby.”

“Hm?”

“You mouth the words to yourself when you read.”

Steve flushes scarlet. “Shuddup.”

“No!” Eddie laughs. “No, I love it! It’s adorable!”

“You don’t.” He sniffs, but does nothing to hide the smile on his face. “It’s not.”

“It is,” Eddie argues back, camera jumping around as he shifts to sit up. “And I’ll prove it.”

“Yeah? How?”

“Uh. That part I don’t know yet. But I’ll figure it out!”

“Mhm.” Steve’s lips twitch up at the corners.

“I’m serious.”

“Mhm.”

“I love every part of you.”

Steve’s smile softens into something lovesick. “I know.”

“Especially the parts you don’t like.”

Steve groans and covers his face with the book, and Eddie chuckles as he turns the camera off.

The last time it picks up, Steve’s the one setting it up. “Babe?” He calls.

“Yeah?”

“Would you love me if I was a worm?”

“If you were a worm?”

“Yeah. Would you love me.”

Eddie walks into frame to grab Steve’s hands and hold them. “My darling,” he murmurs, “I fall more in love with you every day. It’s the easiest thing I’ve ever done and the easiest decision I’ll ever make. And I make it every day, I have for years now. If you were a worm, I’d build you the best little worm house. I’d do all the research and find out what you can eat, and I’d always have that. I’d learn to speak worm so I could talk to you.” He lifts one of Steve’s hands to his lips. “If you were a worm? Baby, I’d love you more than any worm’s ever been loved before.”

“Oh,” Steve squeaks.

Eddie presses a brief kiss to his lips before pulling away. “Why don’t you turn the camera off and come join me upstairs?”

Steve gapes even as he reaches for his phone. “You absolute asshole-”

“I meant every word, baby. Let me show you how much?”

Steve flounders, and the video cuts off for the last time.

Permanent Taglist: @justforthedead89 @ilovecupcakesandtea @madigoround @bookbinderbitch @suddenlyinlove @nburkhardt @artiststarme @paintsplatteredandimperfect @i-less-than-three-you @alyelf @quarble @messrs-weasley @littlewildflowerkitten @vankaar @starman-jpg @bornonthesavage @steddie-there @goodolefashionedloverboi @mischivarien @cinnamon-mushroomabomination @platinum-sunset @just-ladyme @steddiestains @swimmingbirdrunningrock @imhereforthelolzdontyellatme @martinskis-lydias @notaqueenakhaleesi @sleepyboosstuff @bestwifehaver @m-owo-n @thatonebadideapanda @finalmoondragon @velocitytimes2 @callmeanythjing @ajeff855 @ilikeititspretty @knitsforthetrail @sillysparrow @that-one-corvid @ace-is-bored @inadequatecowboy @harpymoth @weirdandabsurd42

[cupidkenji]

Virginia vampire - 1/2

Pairing: Aaron Hotch x vampire!fem!reader Cw: SLOWBURN BRO, descriptions of hunting/blood consumption, angst, fluff, non-descriptive mentions of an abusive dad, cursing, typical criminal minds violence, possible ED trigger (more in disclaimer), idk bro you tell me Summary: You escaped your scientist father when you were 17. When requested by Quantico PD to deal with a stemming serial killer, you realize you recognize the wounds. You used to be the one inflicting them. Disclaimer 1: Reader is chubby! She's not physically described here at all but a fat woman is always the MC. Disclaimer 2: Reader lives strictly on blood. This story discusses themes of intense bloodlust/hunger, UNINTENTIONAL avoidance of blood (food), and physical consequences due to not eating (more so in the next chapter). This is NOT pro-ana or anything like that, and while these themes are explicitly negative, they are still there and may affect those struggling. Please look after yourself, this is all fantasy and is not meant to trigger you. That's all <3 WC: 9.6k - read part 2 here Like I said, please head the disclaimer as I would hate for anyone to feel negatively about this. I personally have struggled with a restrictive ED and would not write/publish anything I felt would trigger/contribute to pro-ED rhetoric. I'm actually rlly proud of this one I think it's cool and neat and I'm excited to share. I also looped eat your young by Hozier while writing this so would recommend as ambiance. Enjoy <33

The Quantico streets seemed to get darker the more you came out. It was late - technically early, as midnight had passed two hours ago - but still a time of pungent heathenism. Nobody out at this hour had good intentions. You knew yours were certainly questionable, discreetly following a man decked in club attire as he stumbled his way down the street. This was the worst part - having to stalk behind them, giving you nothing but time to humanize them in your head. He was probably going home, back to safety. The process of hiding a body is one you could recite with your eyes closed. It’s bitter and metallic, but familiar, and you seemed to project that harbored guilt onto him. It wasn’t as though he’d never see that safety again, you didn’t kill people anymore. Your unusual diet required this type of robbery, but you’d busted your ass for almost three years to figure out the perfect amount. The amount that keeps you just on the cusp of living, closer to death than most but still able to function effectively. The number of times you felt a heart cease it’s beating against your lips because you went too far would strike envy in the evilest of individuals. The amount you took was pure necessity - a full syringe, never a drop more. It would last you about half the week when rationed out. It was livable, doable, only ever being a problem if you couldn’t get more the exact night you needed to. 

You hated preying on drunks, the alcohol in their blood making it taste rancid, but this was the easiest target you could ask for. Beggars can’t be choosers. He took a moment to catch his breath after he nearly toppled over, and you saw your opportunity on a silver platter. Contrary to the movies, stealth was not an inherent trait you get when you live on blood, you’d gained yours from experience. You never liked being so good at this, but as you rendered the man unconscious and silenced his fall to the ground, you relished in the fact that you were. The days of amateur hunting were long over, and the cries of people as the blood rushed from their necks are ones that echo - ones that sit with you. 

You dragged the man to the innards of the closest alley, propping him against the wall and rolling up his jacket sleeve. You took off the bag hanging from your shoulders, removing a syringe and a flashlight. Since you hunted at night, it was impossible to find a vein without lighting. It was something you realized quick when you made the switch from neck to wrist. You turned the thing on, clamping it between your teeth and angling it down at his arm. Growing up with the world’s cruelest biologist as a father, you were well versed in the world of human anatomy per his insistence. You watched the vial fill with liquid, cursing your entire situation for being so despicable. The only way to properly describe your father was Frankenstein, eagerly allowing his only child to grow into the role of his monster. He’d handcrafted your DNA in a petri dish, ensuring that malice was weaved throughout your most instinctual needs. He was a well off man, respectively referred to as the brightest mind in our current age. He’d gained fame after presenting his magnum opus - the invention of literal vampirism. Somehow, something only he knew how to do, he’d made a string of DNA that derived the body’s energy from the nutrients in blood. He started with insects, impregnating beetles with the specific code, making embryos that fed purely on blood of the same species, which manifested into a hostile blood lust once the thing was born. He’d reached rodents and promised he would be ending his tests there, not wanting to breach the topic of morality and push forward with mammals. Unfortunately, your father was as honest as he was kind, so here you were. 

You finished the extraction and pulled the needle from the man’s flesh, apologizing profusely under your breath. You patched him up, a bandaid over the small hole, and hid him amongst some garbage bags. Nobody out at this hour had good intentions, and you weren’t about to offer them a possible victim for whatever desire they may be looking to express. You hated that you had to hurt him at all, no matter how minimally. The least you could do was shield him from the people who truly intended harm. You tossed the now full syringe back into your bag, the flashlight following a second later, and exited the alley. The only thing that kept your feet moving was the few days of peace you would get now that you had food. Your head pounded with the feeling of blood just sitting in your bag, the body full of blood laying defenseless just a few feet away. It was a battle you fought everyday, seeing those closest to you as two separate entities - one was a person you loved, one just a plethora of functioning veins and arteries. Their lifeforce was the closest thing to ambrosia you could imagine. It’d taken you years to get control, though, and you refused to undo that for a couple minutes of gratification. You couldn’t. Losing control would grant your father the victory he ached for, and you would die before letting that happen. You rushed to walk away, choosing to propel yourself with the image of his disappointed face rather than the breathing blood bag leaning on a dumpster. He’d killed your mother before you even got to know her, you refused to be the reason someone didn’t get to know their parent.

–

The BAU was an unwelcome sight when the time was five in the morning instead of your usual seven. You’d been ushered to the building by a sleep deprived JJ, spouting off different remarks of remorse for the early hour but needing the team there immediately. The whole table seemed to share in the disdain, as half of them could barely hold their eyes open and the other half were practically chugging shitty break-room coffee. Aaron was, surprisingly, the last to walk in. Greeting everyone with attempted normalcy while visibly fighting off his own exhaustion. His hair was messy, his torso lacking the coverage of his uniform baggy blazer. The sight of him slightly unkempt from the spontaneity of the gathering caused the air to flee from your lungs. You’d had a bit of a staring problem since you started working here, but his appearance now displayed a casualness that was making you dizzy. The deviation from his standard presentation felt strangely intimate, a more personal version of him. You looked away quickly, you had to. He took his spot next to you, having reserved that place for himself when you were first hired. He greeted you personally once he sat down, something for just the two of you. You had looked at him, about to reciprocate when JJ officially started the meeting. 

“Good morning, everyone. I’m sorry for the early start but we’ve been urgently requested by our local PD. They think we’ve got the start of a serial killer, three bodies were found last night with the same MO.”

“Three bodies?” Morgan’s words were laced with bewilderment. “As in three people were actually killed or three bodies were dumped?” The table knew what he was getting at. Three murders in a single night was quite the task. Especially considering the police had to find the bodies, meaning no pedestrian had seen anything worth reporting.

“They’ve left the crime scenes untouched for us, but they’re betting all of them happened in the same time span.”

As if he could read your mind, Hotch asked the main question that’d been circling your mind. “How are they being killed?”

“That’s why we’ve been asked for.” JJ started distributing files containing the crime scene details. “All the victims so far have the same stab wound in their carotid. Nothing had been stolen, and they were all found in alleyways. For the amount of blood that comes with puncturing an artery, there wasn’t a drop found at the scene.” 

“No signs of torture?” Morgan was looking at the photos as he asked, double checking the information he was reading in the file.

“All of them were basically untouched from the neck down. There weren’t even indications of defense.” JJ shook her head as she spoke. “This guy definitely gets the jump on them.”

“A blitz attacker.” Prentiss concluded, closing her file as she reached the end of it. “Any witnesses?”

“None.” The worst answer JJ could have. “Police found them while on patrol.” 

“Alright.” Hotch stood from his seat. “Prentiss, Morgan, I want you at the first scene.” The agents nodded at the orders, exiting the room to complete the task. He looked towards Spencer, drawing his attention away from the file as he addressed him. “When Rossi gets here I want you guys at the second body.”  The man just uttered a “got it” and looked back down, waiting on Rossi’s presence to start moving. Aaron’s eyes made their way to you. “I want you with me. We’re gonna go meet the officers at the latest discovery.” You couldn’t meet his eyes, feigning preoccupation with closing your folder and simply muttering a noise of agreement before standing. 

“I told the press to keep it quiet. Last thing we need is word of a mini spree leaking to the public.” JJ informed the remaining people of this on her way out, peeking her head back through the door to say it before returning to her office. You watched Rossi finally show up and retrieve Reid from the conference room as you were leaving, heading to the car with Aaron close behind. 

Once you were buckled into the passenger seat, you started talking. “Three bodies in under twelve hours. Haven’t heard those numbers since the Barly Butcher in ‘64.” 

“Let’s hope it doesn’t reach that.” His eyes, although you couldn’t see them, went slightly vacant at the thought. He couldn’t imagine dealing with that level of killer in the modern age - he certainly didn’t want to. “One was too many. God knows we don’t need a Quantico butcher.”

You couldn’t imagine either. “No kidding.” The drive wasn’t shaping up to be a long one, seven minutes went by and you were already approaching the flashing lights of cop cruisers. You got out of the car, the sheriff swiftly coming over to talk. She had thanked you for taking the case, grateful that her precinct wouldn’t be dealing with this one alone. There were CSI already there, but you slid gloves on your hand and headed towards the body regardless. They were respectful, allowing you control of the scene, walking away as you got closer to give you space. 

You turned the woman’s neck slightly to get a better view of the injury, the image shaking the ground beneath your feet and causing the water in your tear ducts to form a haze over your eyes. There were teeth marks around the incision. Such a minor indent that it was no surprise it went over looked. You could see it because you’d once been the cause of such a thing. The closer you examined, the more parallels you drew to your beginner days. The skin around the wound was curling upwards, a sign of applied suction. No wonder they couldn’t find any blood, it’d been sucked out. You nearly fell off your feet from where you were crouching. The unsub clearly knew enough about the human body to inflict such a precise cut, pair that with the obvious motivation to feed and you got the bone-chilling realization currently seeping through you. He’d made another one. You had a sibling, and he was hungry.

–

When the regroup was called back at headquarters, you lead an uninformed and slightly confused Aaron to meet the rest of the team. He’d noticed your determination at the scene, questioning your findings and being eager to get back when you made him wait to hear about it. You wasted no time as you entered the room, pulling up the image on the big screen to properly show them your theory. 

“The unsub is drinking their blood.” Looks of defeat and absurdity were present in all of their eyes, but you continued explaining, zooming in so close that the image went slightly blurry. “If you look close enough there are teeth prints around the wound, not bite marks, but the type of print you get from resting your teeth around the wound and applying pressure. The edges of the wound are curling in and up, so it can be assumed some type of suction followed the stabbing.” Most of the team was squinting at the screen, absorbing the details you pointed out and already trying to form a timeline, a motive - something. “That’s why they couldn’t find any blood. It was consumed.”

“So we’re dealing with a vampire?” Morgan sighed, his eyes detailing a reluctant belief. He couldn’t argue with your theory yet, it was the only logical thing they had. “Maybe we should visit your dad, Y/n.” 

You scoffed at the quip, images of the man throughout your early life flashing through your head. “Funny.” You furrowed your brows at him. “You’d have to find him first.” You had slipped from his grasp when you were seventeen. The home you spent your childhood in was vacant a few years later, effectively severing all your remaining knowledge of his life. You’d never had any way to contact him, only the relics of his stories that refused to leave you. The only thing he ever spoke about was himself, and most of his tales were burned into your memory like a branding. If you were honest, you’re surprised he’d never physically branded you, he’d surely thought about it. The dread started to build in your gut. You handled most cases with a healthy distance, some could regard it as a coldness but you preferred the simplicity of your process. This, however, was impossible to deal with impersonally. This threw you headfirst into a situation you had never bothered to prep for. Not only would you be seeing how your team feels about what was essentially an early version of you, but you didn’t want to prosecute this unsub. His path was one you walked for years before acquiring the life you have now. You hadn’t been a villain, there was a high chance he wasn’t either. The bloodlust was controllable, he just needed someone to teach him. Pursuing him with the vigor of a typical unsub would wreck you. You felt protective, almost maternal. Your father had made another monster, but that didn’t have to mean they live a life of his design. You could get him out.

“Can I speak with you?” You hadn’t even noticed the analytical gaze Aaron held, too focused on your own internal spiraling. “Outside?” He motioned his head towards the hallway, instructing you to follow him.

You always felt like a kid in the principal’s office when he called you away from the team. “What’s up?” You hadn’t even waited for him to fully shut the door before you prompted the conversation. You were fully prepared to raise hell and high water to find your unsub, and you needed all the time you could get.

“Is something going on?” He always took extra time to check on your wellbeing. You figured at first it was pity, some type of undermining or an indication he thought you were less equipped for the job than others. He’d never hinted at any of those, always showing genuine concern for you, and eventually you stopped thinking he had ulterior motives. “You’ve been skittish and antsy since you saw the body. You’re speaking faster and can’t look me in the eyes. You’re nervous. Why?”

“Hotch.” You sighed his name, and he tilted his head, leaning in slightly as though pulled in by the sound. “I am nervous. There were three people murdered last night. If this guy is drinking the blood of his victims seconds after he kills, there’s no predicting how long the cool-down will be. He could strike again tonight or he could be gone for weeks. I don’t want more people losing their lives because we waited around too long. I need to figure this out.”

He could tell you were withholding something, you saw it in the way he looked at you. Thankfully, though, he allowed you to keep your secret. Breathing out a sigh of his own and just nodding. “You know where to find me if you want to talk.” 

You held back the look of pure adoration you wanted to send his way, settling for the appropriate neutrality. “I know.”

You both rejoined the team shortly after, ignoring the curious looks of your coworkers and instead inserting yourself into the conversation. Reid went over the typical blood fetishists, along with the multiple philias and phobias associated with blood consumption. All of them falling flat in one way or another. You suggested swabbing the victim’s neck for traces of saliva, Prentiss calling to request the task be performed the second you’d said it. With hours going by and the promise of lab results by tomorrow, you all said your goodbyes. You said a silent prayer under your breath for a body-less night and drove home with a plan. If he was like you, he’d be out again tonight, and you had every intention of finding him.

–

This was the first time in your life you’d ever felt thankful for your knowledge of nightlife. Patrol was amping up, tonight it was one too many cop cars on the street. Tomorrow it could be officers searching the area on foot. With no way to predict the criminal, there was also no way to predict the response, and that was scary as hell. Any attempts they were making to stop him from feeding would affect you just as bad. There hadn’t been a single event since you started hunting more ethically that you’d had to break routine. You wanted to help him, but you also needed to stop him from fucking up your regimen. You were wandering, aimless and anxious. You tried connecting to whatever energetic wavelength you might have with him considering your partial relation, getting nothing but a firm reminder of why that stuff wasn’t considered fact. You ducked away from the second police cruiser of the night, just barely evading the lights before their illumination painted your face red and blue. The alley was a welcoming partner, allowing her shadows to drape over you and create a solitude unique to that darkness. You’d heard the noises a second later - panting, consistent and ragged, followed by a period of silence before resuming. You clicked on your flashlight, shining it maybe ten feet ahead of you and feeling like someone threw sand in your eyes. He was here, dressed in jeans and a black zip-up, hood over the back of his head. You wouldn’t have been able to see him even if his hood was down - he was crouched over a woman, shoulders hunched and mouth greedily stealing what little life she had left to give. He was so small, you physically felt your lips curl in sorrow when you realized he couldn’t be more than fifteen. The woman’s fingers were still flexed, and you assumed she’d died less than a minute ago by her arm placement. They were crooked at the elbow but weirdly resting on the assailant, as though she’d been gripping his shoulders before her strength blew out with the wind. 

You waited, just a moment, stilling to see what move - if any - he would make. He was completely entrenched in his task, but you were surprised your light hadn’t set him off yet. It was only when the river ran dry that he seemed to notice your voyeurism. His head snapped in your direction so fast that you jumped on your feet a little. You thought back to how volatile you’d been in his shoes, deciding the best way to approach him would be that of a rabid animal. You inched closer, seeing him mirror you with a slight back-step. 

“Hey.” You talked quietly, breathily, trying to subdue any dominant undertones you could be carrying. “I need you to listen to me, ok?” You crouched, hoping to put the two of you on the same level. “I know you’re not trying to hurt anyone. You’re hungry, yeah? You’re hungry and I know it fucking hurts. Worse than you ever imagined it could.” You thought back to the days of captivity. Your father made you the absolute pinnacle of gluttony, feeding you even when you finally didn’t want it, engorging you with the only thing you could sustain yourself with. Going from a state of constant overflow to barely a drip-feed was agony, causing fits of hunger so extreme that it was a miracle he hadn’t hit double digits by now. “I can help you, alright? I’ve been there. It doesn’t have to be this way - I promise it’s manageable.” You really should have planned some sort of script for this, you were winging it and from the accusatory look he was wearing, you didn’t think it was working. 

You asked if he knew your father, hoping to establish some reputability in his mind and prove you knew what you were talking about. The name, though, seemed to hit him like a bullet. He took off running and blew past you so fast it knocked you over. You jumped up as quick as you’d been put down and set off after him. The kid was fast, and you knew it wouldn’t be long before you lost him. He had the advantage of being half your height in a city full of narrow shortcuts. You pleaded with him in between breaths to just listen to you, promised you didn’t want to hurt him, all of it was futile. He ducked into a subway and slipped from your grasp before you even knew you had him. Your eyes teared up from frustration, so close to being the saving grace you were desperate to be but just managing to graze it before it leaped away from you. You felt the toll of such a run immediately sodden your legs and weaken your lungs. You didn’t have nearly enough fuel in the tank to give chase, but what were you supposed to do? You’d seen him, almost had him before the acidity of your fathers name melted all the progress you were making. Fitting, you thought. You slipped your phone out of your pocket, you were still an agent who had just found a body. Another victim in a string of serial killings; if you didn’t report it and were traced at all back to the scene you could be fired - or arrested. Hotch’s contact burned a hole straight through your pupils. How the fuck were you gonna explain this? You just happened to be on a classic midnight walk alone as a woman in the city currently housing a vampiric serial killer. You could almost hear the crease of his eyebrows as you told him where you were, requesting the team be awoken and the local PD be sent to you. You’re sure he could hear the ball in your throat as your vision got watery again. He promised he’d be there soon, telling you to hang tight. He was comforting, but there was a determination in his voice that told you he wasn’t letting it go this time. You didn’t know how to prepare for whatever that meant, but you knew some worms would be leaving the can. 

Ten minutes later and you heard the familiar shout of your last name. “What the hell happened?” Morgan seemed worried you’d been attacked, scanning over you to check for any signs of injury. He wouldn’t find anything but your rapidly rising chest.

You watched the EMTs wheel away the woman in a body bag, locking your gaze on Derek when you started to feel nauseous. “I’m fine.” You crossed your arms, rationalizing that maybe a physical security would grant you the strength needed to conceal this mess. “I live right up the road. I go out walking sometimes when I can’t sleep. I just saw the body in the alley, guy was gone by the time I found her.” 

He seemed relieved at your avoidance but also completely floored by the stupidity of walking so late. “Stop walking alone at night.” He was clearly protective. “That's why some of these cases are even possible.” He looked at you, taking your story as truth without a second thought and letting a sense of mourning flood his irises. “I don’t know how I’d cope with having to put you in one of those bags.” How charming. “You get me?”

You looked at him, putting on a face of regretful understanding and simply uttered back a quiet “I got you.” to hopefully dodge all the attention he was giving you. 

He chuckled, looking behind you and gaining a sort of cringe in his smile. “Good luck with that.” He nodded towards whatever was approaching and joined the congregation of other agents and officers, essentially isolating you with the thing you’d been dreading most. Aaron Hotch.

“Aaron-” You turned around to face him but stopped talking when you saw the look he cast at you. Something so curious and pleading for the knowledge you withheld, he seemed to manually dim it with the aspect of his authority. He was your supervisor, but he cared for you as something deeper than that.

“We’re heading back to the BAU. I want you in my office when we get there. We need to talk about this.” He waited a second, letting the unusual professionalism sink into you before seeking confirmation. “Am I clear?” He was gentle in delivery, but the fear you’d betrayed him weighed heavy on you.

“Yes, sir.” You nodded, looking at him. He wasn’t mad, and you didn’t regret the decisions that got you here. Your mind was simply racing with any plausible lie you could tell him to escape this situation unscathed. He knew you better than you were even aware of, you didn’t know if you could get away with lying at all, let alone lying in excess. You just prayed he was feeling particularly forgiving, along with hoping he was especially tired due to the hour. If you lucked out, you might only have to relinquish your integrity instead of the truth.

–

The sound of his door closing felt like the final sign of your demise. He hadn’t slammed it, he’d shut it gently and moved to sit opposite you in his office chair. You couldn’t remember a time he’d been genuinely angry with you. Right now he simply reeked of desperation, of empathy, and it was that notion that kept your eyes from meeting his.

“What’s going on, Y/n?” He was so soft, the tone of his voice combing through your ears like hypnotism. You were so fucking guilty.

You stared at his name card and wondered immaturely how it would feel to share a surname with the man. “I told you what happened.”

He leaned forward, propping his elbows on the desk. “You told them what happened.” You begged him internally to just leave it alone. “Now I’m asking you to talk to me. You can’t even look at me. You seem to think that because you can conceal the standard signs of lying that nobody can tell. You slip past their radar because they don’t know your tells, Y/n.” Your heart sped up, he’d probably known you were keeping something from him before you’d even made the choice to. “The top of your middle finger covers your index when you’re lying or when you’re not telling me something, you know that? Every single time. You haven’t held a conversation in the past week without doing it.” He clasped his hands on the table, readjusting to really focus on you. “What aren’t you telling me?”

Something about him always had a way of wearing you down. You’d been smothering the feelings you held for him for years, so when he showed such devotion to you, he could wring you out like a sponge with just a sentence. You visibly deflated, shoulder slumping forward. “I saw him.”

He straightened, assessing how to tackle a statement like that. “You saw the unsub?” You just nodded. “Do you know how important that information is?” He seemed bewildered, even a little angry at the fact you didn’t tell them. “You know better than most how significant every sighting is. Why would you ever keep something like that from us?” He was speaking slightly faster, confused frustration filling his words as he continued. “It’s a miracle you weren’t hurt, Y/n. This was extremely reckless, I don’t understand how you could-”

“Hotch.” You’d never had to speak over him before. “He’s my family.” The words were coated in bile as they left you - this was a steep slope. You hadn’t anticipated sharing even that piece of information, your family history was far too close to your less than common genetic misfortune to ever be talked about. 

“...What?”

Your eyes teared up. You were going to tell him, and you were also going to cry. “I have to tell you something.” You felt the quiver of your lips, heard the shake of your voice as it circled the air. What the fuck were you thinking? 

“My father - um…lied to the public about his testing. He promised everyone that he would stop at mice, but he didn't plan on actually doing that.” You shook your head in tune with your words, speaking slowly as you thought of how to drop this bomb and cause the least amount of damage. “He kidnapped a woman, my mother. At that point he’d figured out a way to implement the DNA strand he was using on rodents into human sperm, and he managed to get her pregnant with it.”

His face went slack, an emotion reaching far beyond shock, beyond disbelief. “You mean…?”

“It’s not vampirism in the cinematic sense, Aaron. We don’t burn in the sun or have heightened senses or speed. It’s just a cruel mutation. Human blood is the only substance our body can process.”

“You - you keep saying ‘we’.” He was frantic, you didn’t blame him. “Are there more?”

“Just the unsub.” The look in your eyes was begging for acceptance, for empathy and tenderness. You hadn’t even expected him to believe you, but now you feared the possibility of him running for the hills and spilling your secret to anyone he came across. “He’s the only one I know of. I didn’t expect my father to do it again.”

“Jesus Christ.” You concealed a laugh at how expressive the confession was making him. You knew it was the worst possible time, but you’d never seen him so human. “Is this - I mean how do you live, Y/n? Are you killing people?” You understood the accusation, but that didn’t dilute the sting of it as it hit your ears.

“No, Aaron. God, no.” You rushed out a denial before he could think too hard on it. “It took me years to figure out the bare minimum I could live on, ok? It’s two full syringes a week, nobody ever dies. Ever.” He seemed out of it, you didn’t know how to gauge whether this was a good or bad reaction. You’d never told anybody. How did you even proceed in a situation like this? “Look, I know, ok? This is fucking crazy, but you can’t tell the team.” He widened his eyes at you slightly like the thought of not telling them was wilder than anything you just told him. 

“You can’t seriously expect-”

“Aaron.” You were on the brink of losing your breath. “I’m not a threat. I’ve worked here for years. I’ve lived with this my entire life and I have control. We need to focus on finding the boy and that won’t happen if they know.”

“Boy?” He furrowed his eyebrows deeper than you’ve ever seen. “He’s- It’s a kid?”

You thought back to the encounter. You could cup him in your palms. “He has to be. He’s tiny, fourteen or fifteen I’d say.” You nearly broke as you thought of the child he’d never get to be. 

“There’s no protocol for this, Y/n.” This was one of the first times you’d seen him speak with his hands. “I don’t even know how to approach it anymore. It’s hard enough dealing with a child unsub when they’re human. How do you suggest we deal with a vampire?”

“Hotch.” Your eyes held disappointment. He was coping with the situation, and you knew that, but his words still didn’t sit right with you. “He is human. A very scared and lost human boy. My dad overfed me as a kid, wanting to disable the signal that tells you when it’s enough. It’s why he’s killing so many, he must have recently broken out. You get…I don’t know, insatiable. You start and don’t know when to stop, it's just blind instinct. He doesn’t want to be hurting people.”

“You speak from experience.” You didn’t want to tell him he was missing the point, but there certainly wasn’t a mutual focus between the two of you.

“Nobody’s perfect, Aaron.” You spoke with tears lining your eyes, your past was the most shameful thing you carried with you. “I need to find him. I can help him.”

He sighed, baffled and exhausted at the entire situation. He nodded soon after. “I won’t tell them.” You felt the increase in oxygen as you practically gasped in relief.

You stood up, stopping with your hand on the doorknob. Were you running? Yes, most definitely. But he wasn’t speaking and you couldn’t imagine he wanted to stay in your company. “I promise I’m not a monster.” You didn’t quite know if you were trying to convince him of this, or if you were hoping to affirm what he was already thinking, but it was the only thing you could think to say. 

He just stared at you, eyes vacant but clearly attempting to imitate the warmth that would normally reside there. “Goodnight, Y/n.” It was such a familiar phrase that it nearly made you puke from the comfort flooding your body. You scoffed at the casual nature of the remark in the face of such an unusual time, but were still unfathomably thankful for it. 

“Goodnight, Aaron.”

–

Three days later, and you were really feeling the distance. He stopped the routine of checking in - he stopped speaking almost entirely. He spoke of you, giving you orders or assigning your assistance to others but never talking directly to you. He used to pull you aside sometimes just to ask about your day, now he wouldn’t even look at you. The bodies had only been piling, patrol increasing night by night all hell bent on catching the so-called ‘virginia vampire.’ The absolute last thing you needed was a media wave of infamy to drown the boy, but there was no stopping the press once they were off and running. You doubted it made a difference, internet access was fully forbidden within the iron fist that was life with your father. You were hopeful some type of DNA could be pulled from the bodies, as the clean up was nonexistent and some of the necks had still been wet upon police arrival, but you got nothing. Or rather, nothing within the system. Garcia had compared the results of the sample to every database in the country - sometimes branching beyond that - but nothing proved useful. It was foolish to be disappointed, obviously your father wouldn’t have registered the baby of his hostage with the required legal standards. You hadn’t even known what you wanted to find, but the presence of absolutely nothing was crushing.

With the new surveillance demands your local PD wanted to meet, the BAU ended up pitching in to night monitor with them. It wasn’t difficult by any means - just tedious. You sat in turned off cop cars for most hours of the night while trying to ignore the persistent burn of hunger that was lighting up your stomach. You knew it’d been too long since you went out, but you were out of luck. People weren’t on the street hardly at all, and even if there was a small population to prey on, the cops breathing down your neck made it nearly impossible. You’d been paired up with Morgan for the last two nights you’d done this, time moving faster with him there to entertain you. Needless to say, sitting in the dead silence of the Quantico pm with Hotch was not what you were anticipating when you came for your shift tonight. You were only two feet away from him, but you could almost gaze into the sinkhole that sat between you two. Cold and dark, brutally reminding you that you’d volunteered for this abyss when you spilled your guts. You stopped yourself from shifting in your seat as another contraction of hunger pulled at your abdominal muscles. You knew that if someone were looking, they’d be able to notice the decline in your recent performance. You were slower, more zoned out, antsy, irritable. You were good at suppressing those things, confident in your ability to conceal them, but you had a feeling the man beside you could tell. He’d been looking at you all night, analytical and lukewarm, letting the start of a conversation sit just on the tip of his tongue. The silence, though, was taking it’s toll on you. It seemed to morph into a ringing that bounced between your ears like it was determined to slip into your skull and bury itself there. You realized you would take the most awkward conversation over a night of partnered solitude. 

You wrestled with what to say, deciding to stick with your streak of brutal honesty. “Will you ever wanna talk to me again?”

He sniffed, continuing to stare forward like he was expecting the question. “I don’t know what you want from me, Y/n.” You didn’t know either. 

You took a moment to mentally gawk at his words, tripping over them in your attempt to process the answer and decide how to respond appropriately. “Anger?” You felt yourself ramp up slightly, your hands moving as you spoke. “Resentment? Sadness? I mean… you’ve just been cold and I can’t work with that, Aaron.” You looked at him, mouth slightly open as you laid your helplessness out for him to see. “I need something.”

“I just-” He shrugged, shaking his head while figuring out the words he needed to say. “You can’t expect me to adjust to that information in three days. I don’t know how I’m supposed to act around you.” It was deeper than that. You both held a sort of mutual understanding that these lumps weren’t as surface level as confusion. The woman he’d been infatuated with for years had confessed she lived on the blood of her fellow man, how the hell do you act after learning that?

You tried your hardest to be empathetic towards his situation. You’d lived with this arrangement your entire life, so it was hard to put yourself in the shoes of shattered expectation, but you tried. It hurt to hear him refer to you like you were a different entity all of a sudden - but to him, you were. “So ask me. Ask me any question you can think of. If you want to know something, I’ll tell you. I just can’t stand the silence, Aaron.” You put your hand to your forehead as you relaxed into your seat. “I miss you. I’m the same person I was a week ago.” 

You heard him sigh and shift to be leaning forward slightly. “Do you have a…” He trailed off for a second, searching for the way to put it that would ensure you understood his question. “You know, a bloodlust? Do you feel what the kid is feeling?”

The air solidified in your lungs. Yes, you absolutely fucking did. However, you weren’t going to sit there and profess your never ending homicidal urges to a man who was already struggling to accept your bare minimum. You weren’t going to scare the man you cared for more than you already had. “Um…you could call it that, I guess. I do know what he’s feeling right now, but I don’t live in his mindset anymore. It gets less the more you live with it.” You weren’t lying, per say. It truly did get easier to manage, you were simply omitting the follow up of still being a bottomless pit for the substance. Just because you weren’t enslaved to it anymore didn’t mean the constant possibility wasn’t a part of your very being. 

He looked over at you, and in the dim glow of the street light his eyes seemed fuller, pupils rivaling puddles of tar. “What does it feel like?”

Your lips parted to let out your breath as it elevated slightly. The car seemed to humidify in the moments between his last question and now. Was he actually asking that? “It feels like…this-” Jesus Chist how did you even put words to it? “this constant…pulsing…in your gums.” You thought back to the haze it used to cast over your mind. You could barely think clearly when you first got out, focused on stealing the life force from beneath the skin of others. “Your whole body just fucking aches for it.” The eye contact between you and him was searing past your eyes and sinking into your soul itself. It was different than any way you’d looked at him before, so full of remorse and pure want that you’re surprised he didn’t laugh at your patheticism.

You caught quick movement draped in a shadow from your peripheral and were knocked back into your actual purpose. You and him both exited the car, creeping up to the spot previously occupied by the figure. You didn’t see him, simply felt the force of him pelt past you and crash into your shoulder. You, to your surprise, held your footing and were running after him a second later. Hotch was just behind you, both of you sprinting desperately to catch the boy. But, just like the last time you’d walked this path, the nimbleness of his smaller frame won almost effortlessly against the two of you, and you lost him. This time, you’d lost yourself right after. You felt the nonexistent padding of concrete on the sidewalk bruise your body before you even registered you’d fallen over. The world wasn’t fading, you were very awake and very aware of the pain spreading to your entire right side. You determined - rather quickly - that your legs had just given out from lack of proper energy. The embarrassment of doing this in front of Hotch severely trumped the pain of hitting the ground. 

“Jesus.” You heard the concerned mumble come from him as he crouched down to your level. “Are you ok?”

You said you were fine, but oxygen seemed to adopt the weight of a semi-truck and it got harder to accept the necessity into your body. You simply told him to stand up, following his lead and rising from your position with difficulty you hadn’t faced before. Your legs failed you for the second time, though, and you fell back onto your knees with a small sob of exertion being expelled from your chest. He crouched back down, stabilizing himself on his knees and letting you lean against him when you couldn’t hold yourself up.

“Y/n.” The shame of your current situation kept your eyes from his, only looking at him when he forced you to. “When was the last time you ate?”

You just shook your head, weakly trying to free yourself from his hands but failing. “Patrol’s been so high I just couldn’t - “ You sniffed slightly, gasping lightly as breathing became harder to do than the chase you just gave. “I couldn’t get out.” 

He muttered ‘ok’ under his breath a few times, seemingly coming to terms with something, looking around in all directions before rolling up his shirt sleeve. The implication of the action registered instantly and you began squirming away from him. Mumbling words of disagreement that you knew he could hear.

“I can’t, Aaron. I can’t drink straight from the source - I can’t stop.” You felt your lips tremble as you recalled the feeling of impending doom clashing messily against the rush of excitement that coursed through you at the possibility. You hadn’t known that specific cocktail in years, you thought you’d go the rest of your life without feeling it again. “I can’t - please.”

“Well -” He started, pulling up his pant leg in search of the small switchblade he started carrying after being disarmed one too many times. “If we don’t do this, you’ll lose consciousness. That means they’ll take you to the hospital on an IV and you’ll have to explain why none of the nutrients are helping you.” You were so fucked. He was right, a rock and a hard place didn’t even break the surface of your situation. This was hell.

Your vision went blurry as the water in them doubled in quantity. “I don’t want to hurt you.”

“Then don’t.” Bastard. 

“Aaron-”

“You’re practically catatonic, Y/n.” He let energy surge through the response, saying it more as an exclamation than a statement. “I’m not watching you die and I’m not letting you out yourself to some random workers because you’re scared. You need blood.” He positioned the knife away from any major arteries and dug deep, exhaling slightly at the sting. Softening his voice, he looked to you again, and moved his wounded wrist slightly closer to you.“Just let me help you.” You watched it run off his wrist and swore you felt the impact of the drops as they fell like a phantom pressure lighting up your skin. He was breathing heavy, you didn’t know if you were breathing at all; only being able to gauge the depth of your existence by how badly you needed what he was offering. You hadn’t felt yourself accept the invitation, only tasted the poison of it all once it bypassed your lips. You wondered if this was how Eve had felt when she succumbed to the serpent. If so, you didn’t blame her. You would have condemned all of humanity for this feeling too. It hadn’t ever felt this personal, this euphoric. You fed on strangers, never on someone who held as much importance as him. This trampled the idea of simply knowing him, this was a bond you could never backstep. It was done, and it was terrifying. The warmth he always seemed to emanate infested in you from the inside-out, beaming through your entire body and fending off any destruction being done by the famished vines winding around you. He held you against him as it happened, safe and welcoming, and it made a heat line your stomach with such intensity that it teased the idea of burning right through you.

He wallowed in the feeling for a few minutes, only stopping the exchange when he felt his head become too heavy for his neck to hold. “Enough, enough.” His way of tapping out, the words making you detach immediately with a slight gasp that prompted your panting breath. You realized he was panting too, eyes slightly wide and skull resting uncomfortably against the brick wall that sat behind him as he recovered. You assumed your face was painted with the horror that was flooding your system, but he couldn’t see the extent of the expression in the darkness surrounding you. “Does it always-” He was cut off by the approaching vehicles of your team and other officers. It was time for a shift change, and you felt a small sob intertwine with your exhaling breath and extend to the air around you. With your newly acquired strength, you got up and limped to the closest cop car. You forced away the urge to cry as you asked the officer to take you home, claiming an urgent need to check on your pets. Just add lying to an officer to your list of sins committed in the last 24 hours. You watched your team congregate around the still bleeding Hotch and bit your tongue. His actions had been so instinctual, so automatic in the way he rose to the occasion. He’d given you something nobody ever had, and you weren’t sure you would ever be looking at him again. 

–

In the week that had dragged by since then, bodies were being found significantly less than they were. You’d successfully halted all interaction between your boss and you - which is much easier said than done - and had essentially treated him as though he didn’t exist. It hurt him - visibly - and you despised being the one to instill such a wounded haze to his eyes, but you couldn’t help it. No amount of oral hygiene procedures could singe the taste of him off your tongue. If you let the thoughts linger in your mind too long, you could almost feel the flow of his blood cascading down your throat. It threw you so effortlessly back to your freshly escaped fledgling days that it fucking horrified you how badly you wanted it. You really should have assumed that consuming the blood of someone you treasured would dramatically increase the craving. You weren’t prepared, not even slightly, and that would certainly manifest into some less than work appropriate advances should you acknowledge your boss again. 

The lack of frequent bodies unfortunately didn’t reduce the amount of cops on the street, but you’d managed to slip back into your routine. It was about ten times harder than it used to be to both evade officers and find people outside but you were fed, and that was all you chose to focus on. You had left tonight’s guy under a park platform a couple blocks over, having to resort to unconventional means when hiding them post-theft. You hadn’t stopped your search for the boy, having been out every night since it started. Sometimes on the clock, sometimes off - always trying to think outside of the box. Clearly, that all proved futile, as there was a boy sitting on your front steps practically consumed by the surrounding shadows when you arrived home. You simply continued your trek, stopping maybe five feet away and giving him the space to control the situation. He looked up at you, pulling down his hood and standing to his full height. He was practically gleaming in the dim porch light, his skin seemed to reflect the moon in a way only rivaled by the finest china. 

“What did you mean?” He was as timid as a mouse, looking at the ground as he spoke. “You saw me that night in the alley and you said you knew what was happening. What did you mean?”

You couldn’t say you were surprised your father didn’t inform him of your existence. Knowing the man, he would most likely deny your relation if questioned directly. “I’m like you, buddy.” You slowly let the bag on your back swing forward to a place of accessibility, grabbing the vial of the inky substance and flashing it slightly before returning it to your bag. “I’d offer you some, but I can’t imagine you’re needing it.” You swung it back to rest behind you again, settling the straps comfortably on your shoulders.

He furrowed his eyebrows, confused but apprehensive, as though the motion might upset you. “You live on that?”

You chuckled at his innocence, barely being able to comprehend the pure dichotomy you were talking to. You understood it fully, but such a sweet boy holding such intense homicidal capabilities was an absurd notion. “Took me a while.” You nodded as you confirmed his question. “But yeah, about two of these a week.”

Disbelief quickly befriended the features on his face. “You aren’t…hungry?”

You looked at the boy with undiluted sympathy, you knew the feeling he hinted at well. If you were him right now, you’d have probably lashed out in a jealous rage at such an ability to control consumption. You hadn’t believed it was a livable amount until you’d contained yourself within it’s limits. “A little, I won’t lie to you. But it’s well worth it to avoid killing someone. You get used to it after a while.” He simply looked down, and you realized you might have made him slightly guilty with your wording. In an eager attempt to pivot the conversation, you told him your name, hoping to get a proper introduction from him.  

“I’m Daniel.” You crouched down after he said that, wanting to open him up a little more by shrinking below his height. “You know my dad?”

You smiled at the ignorance, it wasn’t often somebody didn’t know exactly who resided on your family tree. “I do. He’s actually my dad too.” You preyed with everything in you that you were coming off as comforting, docile. You wanted him to trust you. “How old are you, Daniel?”

“Twelve.” Jesus Christ. 

You tried not to let the shock ricochet along your face. You wouldn’t earn his alliance by being wobbly, you needed to be a dependent structure for him to lean on. “You’ve got me beat, kid.” He tilted his head, the meaning of your statement lost on him. “I was seventeen when I got away. Quite an impressive thing for someone your age.” Praise, you hoped, would solidify you as a place he could receive affection. He definitely wasn’t getting it from your father. 

His eyes went wide, lips parted as you saw his head lean forward in response. “You escaped?” His breathing sped up, microscopic, something you wouldn’t have noticed had you worked in a different profession. “How?”

You felt the bottom of your stomach rip and release every ounce of hope you ever carried. Something wasn’t right. “How?” You questioned him rhetorically, mentally pleading that he wasn’t about to confirm your suspicion. “Are you still with him?”

He nodded his head with such casualty it broke your heart. You knew it was all he’d ever known, but seeing him have such peace with his predicament was a sight made of pure devastation. “Yeah.” He sighed out the response. “He says there’s no use in running away. That if I decide to just stay out one night, he knows how to find me.” You notice his averted eyes, a sudden embarrassment becoming evident in his stance. “I’ve…kinda been too scared to see if that’s true or not.”

“Why don’t you come in?” It took all the effort you had to suppress the desperation begging to penetrate the look you were giving him. “I can protect you, Daniel. He’s not as tough as he pretends to be.” In all honesty, you didn’t know if that was true. He’d never sent you out on hunts when you were younger. He gave you any indulgence you wanted, absolutely trampling your hunger cues and making you a nightmare on anyone with a pulse once you finally broke out. You figured it was a fail safe for if you were ever on your own. He couldn’t have you, but you would start piling bodies and would eventually be put down when they traced it back to you. You didn’t understand his game plan here. Why did he suddenly want a high body count? Had he been starving Daniel out just to set him loose like some feral bull? 

He frantically shook his head, stepping away from you slightly and waving you off. “No, I need to go back.” He started tearing up, remembering the true reason he’d stepped foot on your lawn at all. “I need you to help me, Y/n.” He swiped at his nose as he bit back the tears. “You have to get rid of him.”

You felt your own eyes go watery at the ask. “I’m gonna get you out of there.”

He chuckled, light and short, puzzling you for a moment at what he could be finding humor in. “It’s not even about me.” He looked down. “I just wanna stop hurting people.” 

You covered the tremble in your lips in a pathetic attempt to mask the sadness that poured from you at his declaration. “I’m so sorry.”

He returned his head to the safety of his hood, refusing your apology with a shake of it. “It was nice meeting you.”

You stared at him, every instinct you had sparking with the urge to shield him. Absorb him into the atoms that made you up and let live through your screen of security. But you couldn’t, so you just sniffed, reigning in any emotion that slipped from your grasp during the conversation and sealing it back inside. “I’ll see you soon.” And then he was walking away, turning slightly to offer a wave before resuming his role as part of the abyss around you. Only one thought remained in your head - You were gonna kill your dad.

[coeluvr]

You're so wonderfully devious. Your IF is so well written. I've played through it once several months ago, lost track of it, then found it again 🤗 but seriously, the complex emotions you pull out of me is what makes me keep coming back.

There's no time to not grieve for the MC. And your time jumps make it so no matter how much time has passed for MC, we don't get that relief. It makes me wonder if the MC feels that way all the time for the last 9 years if the grief we experience is just as intense. So I absolutely adore how you give MCs the ability to name a journal Alistair and to have a tattoo to keep them with you.

I don't know what to do with Rosea. I think the only way to hurt Luceris is by hurting the ones they love, Lancelot and Helios. But then this cycle of revenge continues and warps, and it's this massive spiders web because when you hurt Lancelot and Helios, then you hurt Farah, Vincent, and Hunter. It makes even more people want to put a stop to MC's machinations.

I know we're going to see it in writing, but the generational guilt on these kids [cause fuck they are basically still kids] heads is crushing.

The adults trying to alleviate guilt by saying "Mc is protected as consort" and has the "freedom to do what they want" is a poor consolation prize. They can't get rid of how they were complicit in MCs trauma.

Somehow, you have me litterally insane, tinfoil hat and all, do you play a kind MC so everyone can see how unhinged Luceris idea was? Because I'd love to play this game as quiet and kind MC, one who's forgive and try to move on, but when MCs twin died, I became just as crazy as Luceris. Now I have to be okay with the fact that I'm playing the long game of revenge and whatever that looks like.

Anyway, thank you for your work. It's amazing and I can't wait to see what happens next.

My toxic trait is I like being called evil or devious or anything insane. 🥰 Thank you for your kind words! 💗

Honestly, the time jumps do serve that purpose. Mainly because I think MC gets a little better each time jump but then something happens and it brings back what they felt that night in Vesphire.

For example, the time jump to meeting Fadiya is kind of supposed to be like "well at least someone wants to be friends with our baby" and that feeling is kind of hopeful, at least to me. With the 1st short story, I wanted to cement that feeling since it's like "world against MC but this little kid is here!!" and again it's hopeful. Chapter 2 is softer too with Fadiya, there isn't much angst until the very end where it's like "ah right, shit still sucks." and a part of the healing that the player might have felt just dies lol.

Chapter 3 is kind of different but technically MC is doing "better" or well coping better so there has been some progress on their part albeit it can be unhealthy.

I've gotten the "Oh this is kinda rushed" comment a few times but I don't think I could've taken these first few chapters more slowly since it is supposed to be kind of like a blur to MC. In my head, chapter 3 is when things are more slow for them but now they're leaving on a trip so...

I think revenge (that isn't like "get power throw him into jail") will always come with the loss of people. The only reason Luceris didn't lose people is because he didn't really have anyone to lose except for Lancelot and we all know how that's going. (Ikram doesn't count, if she refused he could just get another military general and been like okay. Don't be friends with your boss people. /j)

A Luceris that had Farah wouldn't have done that ever because she would have left him so yeah! It's normal to be stuck between what to do when you have people you care about who actually have somewhat of a normal moral compass.

Easiest way is to simply not have anyone (unless they're 100% in love with you and would throw away all their morals just for you ofc) and well maybe I can help with that! 🤭

The adults are insane and the kids are burdened with the problems that their parents are to blame for. I love the whole "burdened by the sins of your parents" trope. ✨️

God this got a bit too long lmao 😭 it was fun discussing some of the points. 🤝

[kandlewick]

ace trappola and deuce spade; the company's new hires and your new underlings office au, aged up au, gn reader

ace trappola - the lucky kouhai

It was unbelievably unfair how good Ace was at doing his job. It was frustrating watching him pull solutions out of his ass like they were simple answers that nobody was smart enough to come up with. He had just started this job and your boss was already singing his praises! And of course, Ace Trappola couldn't have been a humble guy, oh no, this guy was cocky. He soaked up all the praise like a damn kitchen sponge and walked around the office like he was a lucky charm.

The only lucky he was was lucky that nobody in the office wanted him DEAD.

Ahem.

Anyways, while you both were rarely ever in the same social circle in the office, it was only a matter of time before wires crossed and you two were slapped together on a project. A big project. Something the boss wanted to be absolutely perfect. And what was perfect for the job? His Ace (ha ha, get it! He would belly laugh with beer in hand at the faculty drinking parties) and you, his most trusted advisor. It would've been a fine assignment if Trappola hadn't completely screwed up his half of the job!!!!

"What do you mean it was sent in an email!" He screamed, eyes wide as he frantically dove in to his seat, fingers quickly typing on his keyboard. You could feel the panic and tension rise in the room with every passing second.

"I told you, Ace!" You grabbed the back of his chair and shook it, the wheels groaning in protest, "I told you yesterday over email that your numbers were wrong! What made you think you could use last year's quarters for this years budget! Do you know how much has changed the past few months!!"

Ace quickly hid his head in his hands, too embarrassed to look as you pulled up the email, gesturing at it wildly with your hands, "How are we supposed to turn this in!!"

"Overtime...?"

"UNPAID OVERTIME!!!"

deuce spade - the unlucky kouhai

...sometimes you wonder how Deuce Spade had managed to get hired here. Not that there was anything wrong with his work ethic or his personality but if anything went wrong in the office, it was usually Spade's fault. It was rather heartbreaking actually because you could tell that he worked hard! really hard!! but things just never seemed to work out for him... so for the most part, your colleagues would reduce him to the office gopher, sending him out to get drinks or file paper work, the stuff usually reserved for interns. You could tell that while he appreciated everyone's patience, he was feeling a little upset and bitter about being treated as someone so bottom of the ladder.

And today was one of those days.

It was a humid summer day and it was only exasperated by the office's AC breaking down which left everyone a sweaty and miserable mess. Honestly, you were about to call it quits for the day, more then ready to jump into your shower to wash away all the sweat and grime, but the sound of your boss screaming and the frantic apologies of Deuce were loud enough to startle everyone in the office. You cringed and watched as the man nearly chased the young employee out of this office, slamming the door shut as soon as he managed to slip out. Deuce nearly tripped over his own feet in his effort to get away, dropping his manilla folders and scattering them across the floor.

"There he goes again..." Someone said in a low whisper, "but today of all days? He has the easiest job here and he still manages to screw it up."

"What do you think it was this time? You think he spilt the boss's iced coffee on his paperwork again?"

"I bet he filed something wrong...Seems like an easy enough thing for him to mess up."

You frowned at your coworkers harsh criticisms and watched as the youngest employee bent down to pick up his work. You could tell he was shaking. From tears? or was it anger?

You were quick to drop your things and rushed over to him, ignoring your deskmates as you bent down and began helping, picking up the papers that had managed to scatter out of his arms reach. Deuce watched in barely contained surprise as you handed them over to him, a small smile on your face as you gestured for him to take them.

"Here," You smiled as Deuce reached for the documents in your hand, "Why don't I help you out a bit?"

Deuce's eyes widened at your offer but he was quick to shake his head, his cheeks dotted with a light flush, "Oh no, senpai! I can't ask that of you! I have to work overtime today to make up for the mess I made and I'd feel horrible if you had to be stuck here all night with me..."

You were quick to wave him off although you appreciated his thoughtfulness, "No, really! It's ok! What kind of senpai would I be if I left you by yourself?"

[josphitia]

TigerCow HRT part 2

“Jo? The Doctor will see you now.”

Jo was walked by the nurse towards the same sparsely decorated room that Jo had been in just recently. Why were there no furnishings? Was it simply because Dr. Erian was that kind of man, considering himself too busy to be trifled with such concerns? Before Jo could give it much thought Dr. Erian sat before Jo. Between them was the only thing that seemed of any monetary worth in the entire office: An intricately designed desk of some wood that Jo, while not knowing the exact material, could surmise was very expensive.

“Ah, Jo. Nice to see you again. How have you been?”

“Jo has been okay. Have simply been waiting for call. Now am here.”

“I see your manner of speech is still… the same. If I may ask, is there any particular reason why you speak like that?”

“No. You may not ask. Is it not enough that Jo simply talks like this?”

“...I suppose. Okay. Well, I’m sure you can guess why I called you in. I’ve been working diligently on your request. Believe it or not, the easiest aspect was making the fur purple. Simply adjusting the amino acids until they produce the right combination of eumelanin and pheomelanin. No, as I said in our last appointment the hardest thing to tackle was finding the right balance between the carnivorous and the herbivorous. Too much of one, and you’re simply a striped cow with fangs. Too much of the other, you’re a tiger with hooves. Although, thank you for what you provided the nurse last visit regarding your own specific phantom feelings. While I may not be able to replicate it 100%, your form should be close enough to provide you relief. But anyway, last week I think I finally figured it out. I won’t bore you with the details but I feel I’ve developed an injection-model HRT that will provide you with the results you’re seeking.”

“Thank you, Doctor. It means a lot to Jo that you would work so hard.”

“Oh by all means, you’re quite welcome. I must admit at some point it became something of a challenge for me. I needed to figure it out just as much for myself as I wanted to for you. I wish I could have simply told you this over the phone, but due to those new laws they’ve been implementing, legally I’m only able to disclose information about your treatment in person. As well as requiring you to sign these forms.”

“More forms?”

“Yes, there’s always some new fear to stoke and it seems you therian folk are the next in the crosshairs. These forms simply state that you understand the risks inherent in Human Removal Therapy. That you are technically a unique species and thus are not protected by nor constrained by the current laws set in place for species that you may be, and I apologize this is their wording, ‘mimicking and/or adopting traits of.’ I assure you this is mostly legalese and a way to protect people from being sued.”

“Hrm. Okay…” Jo signed the papers, probably putting too much trust in the man. But he was the only barrier left to what Jo needed.

“Thank you! Now, I’ll go ahead and fax your prescription to your pharmacy as well as needles and syringes. I’ll fax the instructions as well. I’d like to see you again in about two weeks, to assess how you’re feeling about the preliminary changes. I’ll walk you out.”

-------------------------

Jo picked up their prescription as the pharmacist explained the dosage. 1 shot every other day for 3 weeks, then to speak to the doctor regarding upping or lowering the dosage. Enough in this vial to last 3 weeks.

Jo put on a MeTube video simply labeled “How to inject yourself! (For HRT purposes).” The instructions seemed simple enough. Jo filled the syringe, cleaned the area, and began to inject themselves in the way the video displayed. A rush of adrenaline filled Jo’s body as they pushed the thick liquid through the needle and into their body. A typical reaction to a needle prick, to be sure, but Jo liked to think it was their body's own excitement and eagerness as the new hormones rushing through the body.

Jo went to bed that night with thoughts of the tigercow they were soon to become filling every crevice of their mind.

________________________________

TigerCow HRT

First|Previous|Next

Another entry in TigerCow HRT. Hope people enjoy, thanks for looking!

[gojoscalico]

Turn Back Time || s i x

Summary: You were never sure when it started to fall apart but it did. 10 Years later and now you're facing him again. Will it reignite the feelings you both once had for one another? Or will you both end up walking away from each other once again? Word Count: 2228 A/N: WARNING!! MENTIONS OF CHILD ABUSE. Her story past is finally revealed.

Tag List: @coffee-on-a-rainyautumn @thefictionalcharacterssimp @picievi @tqd4455 @lenasvoid @gojosatorubrainrot @yozora7154 @luciiferian

<- Previous Next ->

“So who’s going to go first?” You were anxious. You were about to reveal everything that had happened ten years ago and you were scared that Satoru would hate his clan. Or worse maybe even hate you for lying and running away. “I’ll go first.” You looked up at Riko who took a sip of her drink before speaking, “Satoru and I are not actually in love or engaged. The only way that we could stop my sacrifice to Tengen-sama was if the Gojo clan was supporting my decision. Also I am actually dating Suguru.” Riko let out a sigh of relief, cheeks tinted red as she said the last part of her statement. Suguru placed his hand on hers with a smile that made you so sure he was  absolutely enamored with her, “You did good, baby.” You felt a rush of relief. It took everything in you to not smile. He hadn’t moved on. It was fucked up but you were happy because that would just mean that maybe after you tell him everything you can be by his side again. You looked around the table to find only Hime was shocked. Typical. Of course all three of them knew their deepest darkest secrets but left everyone else out. “Wait What?!” You slightly giggled at her slightly exaggerated reaction. Satoru watched you giggle. There it was. Your sweet innocent smile he had missed. A smile he hadn’t seen since the day you vanished. 

You cleared your throat, “Okay I guess it’s my turn.” You felt everyone’s eyes suddenly focus on you. ”For my story it goes back before I had even met the three of you…As you all know my past wasn’t exactly the easiest, I have never told anyone about it. Not even Satoru, I never had the chance.” You paused as you started to feel your heart beat faster. Here you were about to talk about a part of you that you had never once told anyone or spoke to anyone about unless they already knew about it. You took a deep breath. “My mother hated me. That much you all knew when you saw the bruises and the cuts on me when we had all first met.” You paused. You never realized how painful those memories were for you until you mentioned it. Satoru watched as you bit the inside of your cheek. He knew you were stopping the tears, a habit that he knew you picked up from the abuse. “The reason she hated me so much was behind the secret of my birth. My mother’s family is a very affluent family. They had political pulls, so when they found out that their youngest daughter had gotten pregnant, unwed, they had tried their best to hide the scandalous affairs. They were quick to find her a husband to hide the fact that she was pregnant from some unknown man. Except to my mother that man wasn’t unknown. It was just someone that had been born with no status or money. Something my grandparents had required from her. She tried to run from her family but they had been one step ahead and murdered him. Losing the love of her life she took it out on me. At first she was just negligent of my needs, she never cared to pick me up or hold me as a child. Everything really just escalated when she had a child with her husband. She cared for and loved her in a way she never was able to with me.” You choked on your words. For once you realized that you were jealous. Jealous that you never received that warmth from her but it was all too late now. So why were you hurt by it? 

 “Her husband was never home because he just wanted to be connected to my mother’s family,for their influence on his political career, since being married to my mother he was able to become more successful. He did care for me and my sister. He would buy us toys and he would read us stories, he would give me the parental love I lacked from my mother. And he loved me because to him I was his first-born…But my mother was jealous of the attention he was giving me so in a drunken state, one night, she told everyone…including myself the truth behind my birth. Then just as she wanted all that had stopped. My father would push me away or completely ignore me when he was home. At this point I was alone, even the maids had treated me like trash since they knew my parents didn’t give a damn about me…Just like how she wanted.” 

Satoru watched as you weren’t able to stop the tears any longer. “Then the abuse escalated as I got older. She would hit me,starve me, burn me,or cut me. But only in places no one would ever find, I always wore baggy clothes or long sleeves. The dresses I wore were always past my ankles. Like a doll on display they made sure I looked picture perfect. To keep their little illusion that our family was perfect, alive. I mean after all I am still a politician’s adored daughter. I mastered smiling at a crowd and waving when I had two broken ribs from a beating I received the night before. At school, my sister’s friend’s would make my life a living hell. Of course no one did anything. But all the reasons for my resentment towards her to grow. Because why was I receiving this treatment but she was always clothed in the best brands, given the best food,and was protected from harm. Wasn’t I their daughter too?” You wiped your eyes as the tears started to blur your vision. Remembering the times when she would make friends you made somehow hate you or move away. “Then I started to see things, curses. Created from my mother’s hatred towards me,  my father and sister’s indifference to my treatment and the way everyone around me treated me. It manifested into something that was killing those around us. I was able to see them and I tried to protect them…but instead they blamed me and wanted me gone. Dead.”

Satoru’s heart sank. He can only imagine how you felt knowing that the people who earned a God-given right to love someone as precious as you wanted you dead. He clenched his fist, he thought how right you were not to tell him about this when he was younger because he knew he would’ve killed them for even thinking about killing you. He didn’t understand why they were unable to find the need to protect your sweet innocent smile he fell for. “So they heard of the sorcerers, called them to come and exorcize me, I suppose. That’s when I met Principal Yaga. Everyone around me had harbored such great hatred for me that the curse they had manifested was a special-grade.” You laughed, pain being so apparent in it. You began to sob as you remembered the fear you felt that night. At sixteen you were sitting on the floor of your childhood home’s basement. Looking up at the man towering over you as his gaze softened realizing that you weren’t the threat. You remembered trembling but quietly accepting your fate. To die in his hands. You remembered just as clearly as Principal Yaga did, the look of defeat on your face. You had already gone through so much, so as an act of kindness he brought you to his world. You had always remembered to thank him for his decision that day. You recalled that for the first time in the past ten years you endured your abuse, you cried. You sobbed uncontrollably as he picked you up and coddled you like you were his own child. You remembered asking yourself that maybe if your father had lived you would know the warm embrace of a parent’s unconditional love. You held your hands to your mouth to muffle the whimpers you let out between your sobs. Too busy muffling your sobs you hadn’t realized that Satoru was now sitting next to you.

“I…I remembered how he looked at me that day. But I also thought that was it. I was going to die finally. I did think about how I can fight it. But why? Next thing I knew the curse started to attack the Principal and I didn’t want anyone else to die so with the little energy I had left I activated my curse and saved him. That  was when he decided to protect me. To save me. For my family they aren’t dead but they did hand me over to Principal Yaga...willingly. They told everyone they knew that I had died from an illness and so now I live in the shadows as a long-lost relative of the Yamaguchi clan.” 

You paused as you looked up at Satoru who is now where Suguru had been. He had a pained expression painted on his face. You were embarrassed now that he knew your pathetic past. “I was born as a curse.” Satoru’s face cringed as he felt the pain of you calling yourself a curse. Because to him you were a blessing, a blessing bestowed to him by the gods. Because he alone was the honored one and he strongly believes you are his greatest gift. “Something who reminded my mother of the love she lost. I never thought I deserved love until I met you. But the Gojo clan…they heard about us. Our ‘great’ love story they called it. So they looked into my birth and looked into my past. They were able to find out about the history behind my birth father. And they told me that for you I wasn’t good enough. They said that if you were to become the strongest I would have to let you go.That my past would only hold you back…that the same way I held back my mother, who was now thriving now that I was gone.” You sniffled, looking back on the pain of seeing your family happily on tv. Smiles that reached their ears. Something they had never been able to do when you were in their life. Recollecting your thoughts about their lives being better off if you hadn’t been born. “Seeing that they were right, my family had been better since I had left. Because I was their curse. I thought about how I was affecting you all. Both of you almost dying and Shoko almost losing Haibara…all those would never have happened if I hadn’t showed up. That’s what I thought…so they forced me to make a decision. That I leave while you were unconscious or I stay and you no longer become part of the clan.” You bit your lip as you remembered looking to Principal Yaga for help. You looked at him to defend you, to protect you as he did when he saved you from your family. Your heart shattered as he averted your gaze and agreed with the elders. And once again you remembered that you were alone. In this world there is just Y/N, everyone’s adoration will fade in time even if they state how much you mean the world to them because if they found out about your history they will hate you just as much or maybe even more than your mother did. And that was something you wouldn’t be able to handle. To watch Satoru lose interest in you. To find him resenting you for making him choose between being a Gojo or being with you. 

“I didn’t want you to resent me for taking what you thought made you so great. So I left for Kyoto, where I made sure there was a wall between where I stood and where everyone else stood. All I wanted was the best for you. For all of you.” You said while flailing your arms as you sobbed harder. You felt Satoru pull you gently into his arms. A warmth you have always craved and missed. “I’m sorry…”  Satoru heard how defeated you were. He can only imagine the agony you had felt when you decided to carry the burden of leaving him. He patted your head and you sobbed into his arms as if you were a child again. “I’m sorry…Y/N…all this time I resented you when I should’ve been there to protect you.”

“Those fuck-ass geezers. They picked at her weakness. Played her trauma so that she would leave you willingly. I should’ve known something was off…I’m going to kill those fuckers.” Suguru stated as he watched his two best friends torn apart by a generation that cared nothing more than who was gonna stay on top. Cared more about the past that they completely neglected the youth with their dumb ambitions.  “And I knew everything…I didn’t say anything because it wasn’t my place but if I had stepped in and told you…” You shook your head as you walked up to Shoko hugging her. “No…I know now that we weren’t at fault. It was the adults who exploited our feelings and emotions. So don’t apologize!” Shoko cried harder as she saw you plaster that smile that always felt like home to her.

[dilfspitdrinker]

Let The Light In | Joel Miller x reader

Description: You’ve been babysitting Joel Miller’s daughter all summer. No matter now much you try to deny it, you know you’re into him. But it’s just a little crush that you thought could never be reciprocated, until one fateful phone call. The shift between you two is irresistible, and you’re in for more than you ever anticipated. A/N: I love me some good tension and two characters who clearly want each other but constantly wallow in self doubt and completely misread each other lmao (way more of that in next chapter) Masterlist

Chapter 3

On Monday, you could hardly focus in your classes, anxiously watching the hours go by. Thankfully, your last class was dismissed early, and you wasted no time in rushing back to your apartment. Your place was hardly more than a one-bed, one-bath, and open kitchen, but with the extra time you could clean up a bit. Do the dishes, fold some laundry, wipe down the countertops. Once those chores were completed, you changed into a tank top and shorts, telling yourself that it’s because it’s hot today, not because Joel would be here any minute now. You even bothered to sweep the notebooks and pens scattered on your desk into a drawer, as if he would be in your bedroom or care at all.

You jolted when there was a knock at the door. You quickly checked yourself in the mirror, ignoring how ridiculous that was, and then hurried over to the door, straightening the rug on your way.

You opened it up and immediately met Joel’s eyes, somehow looking more handsome than ever before. He looked like he’d just gotten done with some particularly strenuous labor, there was a light sheen on his forehead, and his skin looked a bit more bronzed. You greeted him with your best smile and a cheery, “Hi!”

“Hey you,” he grinned, forcing himself to not let his gaze drift. He’d seen you in shorts plenty of times – the Texas heat after all – but he’d never seen this particular pair. Cut off at the perfect length, in his opinion. He hardly heard what you said as he followed you into the kitchen, having to rip his gaze away from the sway of your hips. Focus.

You demonstrated the issue with the sink, “So yeah, it comes out really weak, see? Pain in the ass when I’m trying to do anything fast.”

He set his toolbox on the counter, “Let’s see what we’re workin’ with here.”

As he started, you pretended to pay attention to what he was doing, but that was just a ploy to stare at his hands and arms. You leaned against the counter, eyes glazing over a bit as you thought about how those hands could grab you.

Normally, being watched while doing a job didn’t make him nervous, but somehow you had him more wound up than any overly-involved client.

“How was class?” he asked, hoping some small talk would ease the tension.

“It was alright. Chemistry isn’t the easiest subject for me.”

“Just the fact that you got into college makes you twice as smart as me.”

“Oh come on, that’s not true.”

“You get a lot further in life if you have brains.”

Your eyes flickered between his fingers and his concentrated face. “It’s important to be good with your hands, too.”

He tilted his head to glance at you. So much for easing any tension.

His eyes looked so tantalizing, wide but with a certain coyness behind them. Everything else seemed to fade, like you could just melt into his gaze. Then he held something in front of you, and you had to force your eyes refocus. Right, the sink, he’s here to fix the sink. And he’s doing exactly that while you’re busy ogling.

“You could clean it, but with the state of this one, you’re better off just replacin’ it,” he fished out an identical but shinier part from his toolbox.

“Is that gonna cost me extra?”

“This is complementary.” He returned to his task, replacing that thingy you were too dazed to pay attention to.

You rolled your eyes, pushing yourself up to sit on the counter. “By the way, did I get promoted or something? What’s with the pay raise?” Last night when you checked your bank account you saw that Joel had transferred you more than your usual babysitting rate.

“Just thought you deserved it,” he smirked.

“That’s really not necessary.”

“Knew you’d say that,” he murmured. “Woulda paid you more if I could,” he added, just to get a rise out of you.

“You don’t have to pay me to spend time with you,” you remarked, forgetting that he actually paid you for spending time with Sarah.

But he played along, “You’d hang around an old man for free?”

He could hear the smirk in your voice, “Only if it’s you,” he rocked when you lightly pushed his shoulder, “and you’re not old.”

He let out a deep laugh, then stepped back from the sink. “Looks like that should do it. You let me know if it starts acting up again.”

“Will do,” you said, masking your disappointment at his efficiency.

“Anything else ‘round here that needs fixing?”

“Ummm…” you scanned the area, trying to think of any random annoyance he could work on just to keep him here longer. “This cabinet is kinda squeaky,” you pointed to the one right next to your head.

“Can’t have that,” he sidled up to you, his hip brushing your knee.

He worked leisurely, and your eyes raked over him, no longer caring about being obvious. He could practically feel your gaze burning his skin.

You spoke up, “But seriously, how much do I owe you for this?”

“You don’t have to pay me to spend time with you,” he echoed your words from earlier, then added, “or come up with odd jobs.”

“Hey, I just mentioned the issues, you’re the one who offered to help. Sounds like you’re looking for excuses.”

He smirked, eyeing you up and down. “Maybe I am,” he rested his large hand on your bare thigh. Your breath hitched.

A sharp knock at the door startled you.

You hopped off the counter, sharing a look with Joel. He stayed back while you opened the door, and to your displeasure, it was the guy from Saturday night’s party.

You couldn’t even offer a fake pleasantry before he demanded, “Where have you been?”

“Why do you need to know?” you retorted.

“Why’d you ditch me at the party?”

“Because I got bored,” you began closing the door in his face, but he pushed to keep it open.

“You weren’t home that night, or yesterday.”

“No I wasn’t. And don’t come back here.”

He raised his voice, “I’m just checking on you-“

“Didn’t ask you to.”

“Damn bitch, then I won’t!” he seethed, but then his face dropped.

You could feel Joel’s presence just over your shoulder.

His voice was a deep rumble, a tone you’d never heard out of him before, “Get out and don’t come back.”

The guy’s eyes flitted to yours, “Who the fuck is this?”

“None of your business,” you snapped. Joel reached around you, and together you slammed the door shut.

After a moment of silence, you turned and leaned against the door, pinching the bridge of your nose. “Sorry about that,” you muttered, but that barely began to cover it. That was horribly embarrassing.

“Not your fault, darlin’,” Joel said softly.

You looked up at his face, but avoided eye contact. His hand was still planted on the door at your side.

“It’s a good thing I stayed at your place the other night,” you said quietly, matching his volume.

He nodded, eyes scanning your whole face.

Realizing your proximity, the space between you felt electrified, and you ached to lean in and close it.

Carefully, as if to not startle you, he moved his hand that was on the door, and held the side of your face. You gratefully leaned into his palm, letting your eyes fall closed. His skin was calloused but his touch was soft.

You let out a breathy laugh, “See? I don’t have the best luck with boys.”

He quirked an eyebrow, “What’d I tell you? Boys will only waste your time.” He hesitated, savoring the serenity on your face before he was sure to ruin it, “Maybe you do need a man.”

Over the pounding of your heart you barely heard yourself say, “A man like you?”

“If that’s what you want,” he breathed.

You opened your eyes to look directly into his, an air of boldness behind your expression, “It is.”

As your gaze fell to his lips, his hand shifted back from your cheek to cradle more of your neck. You drew closer to each other, magnetized. He could practically taste your soft breath. This could be a horrible mistake, and you both knew it, but you each selfishly shoved those anxieties down. You just needed this so bad, you swore just one kiss from this man could satisfy every need. Your heart was now thundering in your chest as the inches between you shrunk.

And finally – god, finally – your lips met his, and you felt like you might burst with emotion. It was a long, steady kiss, but so soft, you could sense his apprehension. You weren’t about to let this moment get cut short, so when he began pulling away, you were already leaning in again. That eagerness might’ve been the sign he way looking for, because this time he wasn’t so shy. He deepened the kiss, and you were so quickly losing yourself in him. The only thing grounding you was his hand still holding your face, and the added warmth of his other hand curling around your waist. He pressed you up against him and you clutched his t-shirt.

You were begging for this moment to never end, because whatever came after would be complicated. He began pulling away again, and again you drew him back in. He smiled against your lips. “Relax baby,” he murmured, “I’m not goin’ anywhere.”

You looked up at him through your eyelashes, and it made him wonder how he had ever resisted you before.

This time he initiated the kiss, and with more intention. He let you lead before because he had to be sure this was what you wanted. With the way you didn’t even want your lips to separate, safe to say it was. He kissed you tenderly, swiping his tongue across your bottom lip. Your soul practically left your body. You realized every kiss before Joel was an extremely mediocre experience.

And it was like he read your mind, his voice deliciously smooth and low, “How was that, hm? Better than those stupid boys you’ve been hanging around all summer?”

You’d been on a handful of dates in the past few months, none of which amounted to anything. Occasionally you’d mention an embarrassing or sour moment from them when Joel asked about your weekend. You didn’t think he’d remember. And Joel himself was finally admitting to every thought he’d repressed for months now. These fucking idiot boys didn’t know anything. Didn’t know how to treat you right, didn’t care about your comfort, didn’t want to make the effort. You were settling for less because you didn’t know what it’s like to be taken care of by a real man. He swore he’d show you if you let him.

He hummed again and you finally responded with a nod, eyes locked with his. No one’s ever made you feel like this, no crush has ever driven you this crazy, no kiss has ever given you goosebumps like this.

“That’s right baby, I know,” he stroked your cheek with his thumb before pulling you in for another sweet kiss. You were surprised your knees weren’t buckling at that.

You separated enough to tell him, “Yeah, I’m never bothering with boys again.”

“Ruined ‘em for you, did I?”

You giggled softly, and your cheeks were a rosy tint, and you were so precious it hurt him.

He tucked you under his chin, your nose pressed against his neck. You breathed deeply, logging his scent. You resisted the urge to taste his skin.

He held you for a minute, thumb rubbing circles on your hip. 

“I gotta pick up Sarah from school,” he said, untangling his fingers from your hair.

You nodded wordlessly, arms dropping to your sides. That was it then, fantasy fulfilled, moment over. Who knew when you’d do this again, if ever. He would probably want to forget about the whole thing as soon as he’s out the door.

The time had honestly slipped his mind, and he did have to go, but he didn’t want to just leave you hanging. He lifted your chin so you’d look at him, “I’ll call you later, okay?”

“Okay,” you gave him a small smile.

Moments later, you stood in your apartment alone, the space feeling impossibly empty.

Chapter 4

Masterlist

[ughkat]

focus on me | l.r.h

part one

tutor!luke au

your college professor assigns you to an unexpected tutor for your music class. ❥

overall story cw: smut, fluff, tutor x student

wordcount : 1131

-

Soft rock played through my headphone's as I took in the unfamiliar sights around me. It was my second week at my dream college in Los Angeles, but I had yet to make myself at home. I swiftly guided my way down sidewalks with my head down, and towards a building labeled "Music" and "Theater", the building containing my next subject.

My school counselor aided me to join a special elective or extracurricular for more credits, my options being an extra math class, or a music class. I went with what I thought was the easiest choice, choosing to not subject myself to extra math. Not that I had anymore interest in playing an instrument.

Within seconds of entering my class, my professor quietly beckoned me. I let out a heavy sigh, knowing he was going to mention my work ethic in his class.

"How's your morning going?" He spoke respectfully, not looking at me while he sipped a coffee. I took a seat at a small stool beside his desk.

"Fine." I smiled with a nod.

"I've noticed you're struggling a bit in here. Have you been practicing out of class?" He questioned.

"Uhm. A little, here and there. I get busy with my other classes." I tried my best to create an excuse for my lack of passion for guitar. My professor let out a quiet "Hm." before turning his chair towards me.

"A past student of mine is a tutor, every fall he comes back down here to help out my students." he began, "I think you would benefit greatly from his knowledge." I mentally rolled my eyes at the thought of someone tutoring me about something I had no drive to expand my knowledge on.

"I think I'll be okay." I spoke kindly. My professor let out a small chuckle.

"Y/n, I wasn't so much asking you as I was informing you." He spoke slowly. "You will continue losing credits if you keep up the work you're doing." I looked at him with frustration.

"So I have no choice?" I sighed.

"I'm sorry, I just want you to succeed, and

Luke is an amazing tutor." I stood up from the chair at took my assigned seat, dwelling on the idea of being taught guitar by a stranger for the rest of class.

"Y/n!" I heard a cheerful shout ahead of me.

I looked up from the floor as I exited the music building, and was met with the face of my best friend, Leah.

"Hey." I spoke flatly. Leah frowned.

"What's the matter with you?" We continued our way towards the courtyard for lunch, dodging the rush of students in our path.

"I have to have a tutor for my stupid guitar class." I began, "I don't even wanna be in that class."

"Have you met the tutor yet? Maybe it'll be fun?" Leah spoke with optimism.

"Not yet. He used to go here though, his name's Luke, I guess." I muttered. Leah stopped in her tracks, turning to me slowly.

"Luke what?" She questioned. I shrugged, confused to why his last name was so important to her.

"I don't know, I didn't ask." I mumbled.

"Find out and let me know." I raised an eyebrow at my friends eagerness as we arrived to the courtyard.

2:00

I swiftly finished my day, my music and sketchbooks helping the minutes pass. As I made my way towards my dorm, I had accidentally brushed shoulders with a faceless figure. Before I could see their face, they were paces behind me. He was tall, really tall. His hair had a slight sandy blond curl to it, and he walked with grace, but with a purpose.

Thinking nothing of it, I continued to my dorm.

I tossed my black tote bag onto my bed, myself following shortly after. I let out a sigh as I bent down to unlace my converse, kicking them off of my tired feet.

The burdening thought of my mystery tutor ached my head, I began to feel my mood slowly decline. Why should I have to put effort into something I have genuinely no interest in? And why is it my fault when I do bad in that subject? I reached for my phone and saw a text from Leah.

"Can I come to your room? I'm boreddd."

I giggled at the message before giving her a yes, beginning to tidy up the small space.

My roommate mysteriously disappeared after the first three days of school—by disappearing I mean she dropped out, and none of us are really allowed to talk about it—, leaving me with the dorm to myself. I thought I would appreciate the alone time, but I find myself wishing I had more company. I did my best to decorate the dull room with posters and plants, and some decorations from home.

Three simple knocks landed in my door, I sat up from my seat to let my friend in.

"Can you please elaborate why you need to know my tutor so desperately?" I laughed as we took our seats on my bed.

"It's so dumb, honestly." She began, shaking her head with a giggle, "I guess there was a boy in one of the music classes last year named Luke, and everyone I know says he's like, outrageously hot or something." She explained. I raised my eyebrow and laughed.

"Well, he can't be the only Luke in this school. It's probably not the same kid." I shrugged.

"Hopefully it is. I've heard every girl who tried to ask him out got rejected." Leah dramatically widened her eyes.

"Whatever." I giggled.

We spent the after noon and early evening gossiping about professors, new students, and my mystery tutor.

5:30

After Leah's departure, I stared blankly at the guitar in its case across the room from me. I huffed before getting up and grabbing it from its enclosure, taking my seat again.

I plucked cluelessly, unsure of where to even begin. I placed my fingers to where I thought I remembered was a C chord, and hesitantly strummed down. The guitar emitted a strenuous tune, causing my face to scrunch. I tried once more, readjusting my fingers and strumming again.

"Ugh!" I groaned, shoving the guitar to the side of me. I was aware of my own impatience, but was too prideful to admit that it was my own lack of motivation to practice that was causing it to sound bad, and not the guitar itself. I began to think to myself, maybe a tutor wouldn't hurt? The faster I get help with the tutor and do the bare minimum, the faster I can leave the class.

I laid on my back in my bed, soaking in my own boredom.

[yutafrita]

[12:02pm]

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Sungchan x Superhero!Reader

A part of Through the webs but can be read as a one-shot. this will def spoil that story!

Genre: Fluff, some angst, but mostly fluff, sci-fi

Warnings: spiders and spider imagery, alcohol, references to vomiting, organized crime, depictions of violence, near death experiences

WC: <4k

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Sungchan felt like he lost his mind.

It was you. It had to be you. He just wanted to tell you thank you for saving his life was all. So, why was he sitting awkwardly on the other end of the cafe staring at you?

You weren’t completely oblivious to the soccer player burning holes in your back as you worked on your own project. While Sungchan had been working to figure out your identity, you had been working to maintain your appearance as an average person despite being a super powered vigilante.

“Are you gonna tell him something? It’s creeping me out?” Ten asked. He sat across from you doodling on his notebook. Ten was easiest to identify for a few reasons, but his tattoos made him extremely easy to catch. You had seen him around campus before, so seeing the video of him pulling a sword out from his skin to fight a robber made it click pretty easily for you.

You shrugged, “I don’t have the energy to deal with a mild creep when there’s bigger fish to fry.”

“You’re still focused on the Capsik case, huh.”

You cringed. Capsik was one of the richest men in the city, and you were heavily suspicious of his wealth and true intentions.

“My intel is saying there’s going to be a robbery in the Mayor’s home soon.”

“Hm, I think Jaemin has a friend that works by the Mayor’s place. We can stake out there to see if we catch something.”

“Perfect,” You nodded.

“Hopefully we keep up the good luck,” he got up shortly afterwards, rushing out to his next class on campus.

You went back to your notebook, writing out some last notes before you felt the air shift in front of you.

“Can I help you?” You didn’t bother looking up, already feeling irritated.

"I'm Sungchan," he spoke, and you still didn't look up.

Sungchan on the other hand was shaking in his sneakers. “Why would you acid wash your shoes?”

This caught your attention. You glanced down at your stupidly expensive boots and flinched. A few weeks back, you saved someone after they slipped and fell off a building. Lucky for you, they didn’t catch a glimpse of you, but unlucky for you, they were drunk and threw up on your boots. When you got back to your apartment, you grumbled to yourself as you tried to disinfect them in vinegar, only to accidentally stain the boots.

They were too expensive for you to not keep wearing!

“It makes them look cooler, no?” You lied, plastering a smile on your face and kicking your foot on the table for him to see. He blinked quickly, and you swear you almost had him fooled until he shook his head.

“You saved my life,” he whispered, his eyes wide. Shit.

Quickly, you shoved all of your stuff into your backpack and walked out of the cafe. Maybe if you went fast enough you could outrun the athlete.

This was a bold, foolish thought. He was fully in a soccer uniform with his hair held back with a sweatband and a large duffel bag sitting at his hip. He was fully ready to confront you.

“I told you, I don’t know what you’re talking about,” you hissed, turning around to glare at him.

“I know it was you who saved my life,” he tried again, his voice low. You furrowed your eyebrows, and took a step forward to stand closer to the soccer player.

“Do I look like someone who cares enough to save your life? I don’t even know your name,” you countered, obviously forcing a confidence that was not there. You hated being so mean, but you were desperate- you had barely been a vigilante for long and already someone had figured out your identity.

Sungchan paused, analyzing your face before nodding, clearly standing his ground. Sungchan had thought for a long while if it was really you, and between your voice, the shoes, your stature, and your attempt to brush him off, he felt certain that you saved his life.

“You’re not going to let this go, are you?”

“Nope,” he smiled in a smug, excited way. He was so forward with his thinking and emotions, it was jarring to you.

You huffed, before looking around to inspect who else was around you both as you stood in the University's grass courtyard. “Come with me.”

“Where are we going?”

“You sure do ask a lot of questions.”

“And you don’t give a lot of answers,” he countered. You let out a harsh laugh, earning additional looks from your fellow students as you moved through and out of campus. After a block, you lead him into the building you've begun to regard as your home.

“Is this your place?” He asked as you entered your apartment. He stood at the door, afraid to enter.

“I’m not gonna bite,” you announced, arms crossed in your living room as you waited for him to enter. You took him to your balcony, and you two stood on there for a moment, staring out in silence.

"This is a sick view," Sungchan noted, looking out at the horizon. Sighing, you pointed to the building across the street and his eyes widened.

"I was annoyed at how loud that rooftop party was and just came out to glare. I didn't think someone would be drunk enough to slip off a roof," you explained, staring at the ledge the lanky man slipped off of.

"I'm not going to tell anyone," Sungchan spoke. He was sincere, this was obvious as you studied his face.

"Okay, I trust you."

"Thanks," you were quiet for a moment.

"This doesn't make us friends, by the way," you added. You didn't want to owe him anything, and you didn't want him to force himself to hang out with you.

"Thank you, for saving my life... and I'm sorry about your shoes," his voice was so small and he moved so quietly, you almost didn't hear him leave.

*****

“Twenty bucks! I’ll pay you twenty bucks, Bambi!” Yangyang’s voice was loud in the morning, and something about him being over the phone made his begging almost intolerable to Sungchan.

“Where’s the class again?”

“In the science hall! It starts in twenty minutes! I need to cover my coworkers shift so I can get these concert tickets but I need you to record the lecture or else I’m screwed.”

“Fine. I’ll sit in the back and record it.”

“Oh my god dude I love you!”

Sungchan made it to the class ten minutes later, his bed hair swooped into a baseball cap and his body snuggled into a hoodie and old soccer pants that had a grass stain on them.

The classroom could hold up to 75 students, so Sungchan wasn't too worried about the professor noticing him. Sitting in the back he opened his laptop and set a show on silent with the captions on, and had his phone ready to record.

"Are you watching One Punch Man?" he looked next to him in shock to see you standing over the empty seat next to him, looking over his shoulder at his laptop.

Yangyang did say you were classmates, he just never said what class.

"Uh... erm yes," Sungchan answered once he realized how long he was staring at you for. Without giving it much thought, you sat next to him and throughout class silently watched three episodes together. Throughout the lecture, you two took to writing notes on your notebook, sliding it to each other in hopes of the professor not noticing.

You’re not in this class

I’m not, my friend just asked me to record the lecture for him.

You’re a good friend

I know. I need to stop that.

You held back a laugh at his note. You were trying to not be too friendly with him, but he frankly seemed like a deer in headlights most of the time. You liked it.

“Do you like Demon Slayer?” He asked once class ended. You were packing up your notebook, so hearing his actual voice to you aback. You nodded in response.

“The theatre down the road is playing the new movie in an hour. I was already planning on going… do you wanna come with?”

Why were you so drawn to the lanky, nervous soccer player? Maybe it was his inability to hide his thoughts and feelings, or the way you would catch him taking notes during the movie because he wanted to talk to you about it afterwards and didn’t want to forget anything.

“Sungchan,” you stated his name as you were about to part ways. You were going to do a solo hike this weekend but had read online that some portions were difficult to do on your own. Your Mom was busy volunteering, so your options were slim. Sungchan was a soccer player, and you figured if anyone could keep up with it, it would be him.

“I’d love to join,” he replied after you asked him.

“Cool, I’ll text you the details,” you turned on your heel and headed back to campus.

****

“Spiderweb,” you called too late, watching as Sungchan walked straight into an old spider’s web.

“Gah! Can’t you tell them to remove their old webs?” He asked, removing the webbing that attached itself to his hat. You picked up Sungchan near the crack of dawn to get to the hiking trail that was a few hours away.

“Why would I tell them that?” You hummed, waving at the small spiders that had taken to following you two along the trail.

“I can’t help that I’m tall but I also don’t want to keep accidentally destroying their webs with my face,” Sungchan complained. He seemed genuinely distressed, so you sighed and turned back to the small formation of spiders.

“Can you guys take care of the webs along the trail please?”

Sounds like a lot of work. But fine.

“Thank you,” you said as they began to scamper off.

“Oh, thank you!” Sungchan called over slowly, his eyes wide as he watched them run along the trail and out of your line of sight.

“You’re not freaked out?” You asked, now taking the lead.

“Why would I be? Spiders are an important part of our ecosystem,” he shrugged it off. He was so… clear. It’s like he was just unable to hide his feelings or his thoughts.

“So, how long have you had your powers?”

“When I started puberty. When did you start playing soccer?”

“Since I could walk. Do you know the other masked vigilantes?”

“Are we playing 20 questions here?” You joked, looking back to see his face unwavering. “I…. Yeah. I figured it out a few weeks ago and thought it would make sense for us all to work together.”

“Woah! That’s awesome… hey, was that guy at the cafe-.”

“I’m not telling you who they are,” you snapped, your breathing getting difficult the higher up the elevation got. The trail was up along a mountain headed towards a really cool peak, but the elevation change was sharp and left it difficult for your lungs to adjust.

“Fine fine- oh look!” You had come across an opening in the line of trees, and Sungchan immediately moved slightly off path to get a better look. “Wow, this is awesome!”

He was right, the view was pretty breathtaking. Considering that the elevation was beating you down and that the trail was empty, you found yourself glad to have invited the soccer player. Your mom had been berating you for not making more friends, and maybe she was right- you wouldn’t let her know that, though.

Wednesday’s became movie nights because that’s when the theatre would have $5 movie tickets, and Saturday’s would be your outdoorsy activity. The only time this would vary would be if your vigilante side got caught up, in which case Sungchan would ask as many questions as possible.

“So, you think Capsik is selling faulty medical equipment?” Sungchan whispered as you sat in on your Wednesday movie. You had picked an early afternoon movie on purpose knowing it would just be you two. Sungchan and you had a horrible habit of talking in the middle of movies, so this was the best compromise.

“That’s one of my theories, that or he’s injecting baby’s with drugs only his group makes,” you posited, taking a handful of the popcorn Sungchan held and eating it.

“Hm. Hey, are you going to go to my states game by the way?”

“I thought I already told you yes.”

“Oh, okay cool. That guy Jaemin is gonna be there since he’s friends with YangYang,” he noted. You nodded, staring at the screen and still eating popcorn. “Are you guys, a thing?”

You choked on a kernel, coughing until it came up. “Oh my god! No, absolutely not, he’s just a coworker,” you half lied. Coworker really just meant he was another vigilante, but Sungchan didn’t need to know that detail.

“Oh, cool.”

“Sungchan I think I’ve told you like, everything there is to know about me. Does Jaemin seem like someone I’d date?” You taunted. You went to grab more kernels until Sungchan lifted the tub out of your reach.

“What kind of person would you date?” He asked. You frowned, and within the blink of an eye used the webbing from your wrist to grab the tub and bring it back into your lap.

“Not someone that takes my popcorn,” you taunted.

“Until you tell me, there’s no way I’ll actually know it all!”

You furrowed your brows, “why are you so interested?”

Sungchan panicked. It was clear to him you didn’t pick up on less obvious social cues, but he was still shy- he hadn’t worked up the nerve to tell you about his romantic feelings yet.

“I… I have a friend that you might be into!”

“…oh. What are they like?” You hoped Sungchan didn’t catch the disappointment you felt. You weren’t even sure why you felt that.

“Well, he’s on the soccer team with me.”

“Is that like, his whole personality?”

Sungchan glared at you, and you raised your hand in defeat to let him continue talking. “He loves nature, is moderately sociable, and his big brother used to have a pet tarantula so he’s cool with spiders.”

Maybe it was the way Sungchan sold this person to you, but you found yourself agreeing to go on a date with the guy. He refused to tell you his name, just that he would be holding yellow roses in the park at the agreed upon day and time.

You felt stupid as you sat on the park bench. You wiped the sweat off of your hands and onto the sundress Jisoo has insisted you wear. You were already planning on how to let this guy down gently when you felt a tap on your shoulder.

“Sungchan? What are you-?” You stopped, seeing the large bouquet of yellow roses he held in his shaking hands.

“I like you as more than a friend,” the sentence came out clumsy despite him having rehearsed it a million times. You stood up from the bench in complete shock as he continued to ramble on, “you’re awesome. I feel like I could talk to you for hours without ever getting bored. You push me out of my comfort zone and you’re really, really pretty and I just want to be there for you if you’ll let me.”

You were quiet, studying the tall man whose hands were still shaking with the bouquet. Carefully, you leaned forward and pressed a soft kiss against his cheek.

“I think you’re really, really pretty too,” you giggled, taking the flowers from his hands. “You make me feel loved. That’s all I’ve ever wanted.”

Sungchan quickly wrapped you in a hug, squishing the flowers as he tried to hide just how giddy he felt.

“So, if we’re dating, that means I can call you my boyfriend?” You teased, walking hand in hand through the park with sungchan.

He pretended to think before responding, “only if it means I get to call you my girlfriend.”

Permatag! @nini0620 @enhazen

[maximoff-pan]

why do fools… | steve harrington (preview)

steve harrington x fem!reader | preview of part one of ??? | 3k words (so far)

summary: you never thought being Jonathan Byers’ best friend would get you into so much trouble, you also never thought it would lead you to him: Steve Harrington…

warning(s): bullying, retelling of season 1, asshole steve and his asshole friends

a/n: this has been sitting in my drafts for a number of months and I haven’t had the time to work on it, but I was wondering if this series was something anyone would want before I continue it… it’s essentially a rewrite of stranger things (hopefully all the seasons but for now starting with seasons 1 and 2) with bestfriend!jonathan and a future steve x reader…

So, if you’d like, take a little read of this snippet and see what you think! Let me know if you’d be interested in this in the future :) comments and feedback are greatly appreciated

• ж • ж •

“Mom’s convinced it was him.”

Jonathan’s elbows rest on his knees as his head drops in defeat. His ankles reach the edge of your bed creating a right angle with the remaining length of his body.

The urge to fall back and just lay there forever passes through his mind. He wants nothing more than to forget this nightmare he’s living.

“Him?” Your stomach turns. Inferring on what you think he’s trying to say seems like the easiest option, albeit risky, but you’re not quite sure you want to assume anything just yet. Maybe he’s talking about his dad, or Hopper, or God knows anyone else. Him doesn’t have to mean him.

But as he turns his head to face yours, you can tell by the look in his eyes that your original assumption would have been correct. So, you tread carefully posing, “What exactly do you mean by that?”

The expression that crosses his face is heart breaking, the moonlight casting an eery darkness across his cheek. It’s the most emotion you’ve seen from him since...well since this entire shit storm began.

“I’m sorry.” You apologize bashfully. You don’t know if he can see it, but you’re struggling with this almost as much as he is.

Jonathan exhales shakily from beside you, waving off your apology gently. If anything, he’s glad he has someone to go to at all. “Last night on the phone.” He clarifies, voice muffled from the sound of his face pressing up against his palms. He’s worried you’re going to think his mom’s crazy, or better yet, that he’s crazy for even thinking of believing her.

And maybe they both are, even if just a little. Regardless, he knows how weird this is going to sound.

“What?” Your brows furrow in confusion.

Caving in to his subconscious, Jonathan allows his body to fall, until his back hits the plush of your mattress.

“Someone called late last night,” he admits with a sigh. “Mom picked up and they just started breathing into the receiver—” He cuts himself off with another deep breath. “Then the power surged and took the whole thing out. Mom swears she heard Will breathing. But she said it was like he was somewhere else, like she could feel him in the walls or something.”

Eyes dropping suddenly, your heart lurches. “In the walls…” You repeat the words breathlessly. But your voice doesn’t go up at the end of your sentence; you’re not asking a question, merely echoing him, as if you’re trying to convince yourself that what he said is exactly what you heard. 

You trail off slowly until the only thing you can hear is the blood rushing through your ears. Falling back beside him, an exasperated puff of air leaves you as your body makes contact with the mattress. 

“God. I don’t even know what I’m saying anymore.” Jonathan groans, dragging out the first word like some kind of prayer, even though you and he both know he’s never believed in God a day in his life. “I sound so—” he struggles, before you provide an answer for him.

“…fucking crazy?”

And he actually laughs for the first time in over two days. Because that’s exactly how he feels. Fucking crazy.

“Pretty much.” The breathless whisper falls from his lips without so much as a second thought.

And you chuckle lightly to yourself as a blanket of silence engulfs you, leaving you momentarily to your thoughts.

It’s not an entirely difficult concept for you to wrap your brain around. The implication that there’s some inter-dimensional phenomenon at play in Hawkins is nothing new to you. If you’re being honest, hanging around Dustin Henderson as often as you have has opened your mind to some pretty out there scenarios.

The kid’s got so many bogged up, bat shit crazy ideas of what’s roaming in the shadows that almost nothing can surprise you now.

Let’s see… Aliens? Not really. The shock factor on that one died out a long time ago, what with the release of all those extraterrestrial movies that Dustin keeps dragging you to. How about, monsters that go bump in the night? Not even close. Or, god forbid, mutant children with super human powers? Now that one’s a little harder to digest, but Dustin Henderson has his own hypothesis (with albeit somewhat convincing evidence) on why all of the above exist. Because of course he does.

And most of the time, you’re just playing along with him to keep him busy, but now? Now you’re not entirely sure he’s so far off from reality.

But then again, you’ve always entertained some of Dustin’s (and hell, even Joyce’s) more adventurous theories, while others have been less than keen to, writing them off as the town’s conspiracy nuts. Let alone the likes of Murray Bauman… He’s been driving Hopper mad for a few years, but you’re starting to think that maybe there’s some truth to his wild conspiracies. A glimmer of hope to his madness, if you could even call it that. 

“I know how it sounds.” Jonathan’s voice is soft, but mellow, breaking the silence delicately, (you almost laugh, as if Jonathan Byers knows how to do anything harshly). It cracks at the end, like a choked up sob. He’s not quite crying, yet it sounds like he’s on the verge, barely holding it together as it is. 

It’s so hard to see him this way. But it might be harder to feel it too. Because despite having known Jonathan for what feels like forever, you’ve known Will for just as long, loved him just as long. In a strange way, he’s your little brother too, blood be damned.

Exhaling softly, you wring your hands together. It only takes you a couple of moments to collect yourself to respond, trying to banish the sadness from your tone. With everything that’s in you, you don’t want him to hear your pain, even though you’re sure he knows it’s there. 

And it really shouldn’t surprise Jonathan, but he can’t help himself, because when you do finally speak, you’re more than composed. Not at all like he’s just dropped some whack job theory on you, that he’s not even sure he believes himself.

“I believe you.” You say with so much surety that Jonathan almost doesn’t know what to do. Your blind faith is both reassuring, and paradoxically, a tad unsettling. But before he can say anything, you’ve beat him to it. 

“The more important question is, do you think it was Will?” The cadence of your voice rises and falls calmly.

Head turning to the right, he locks his gaze with yours, soft brown orbs meeting your (e/c) ones. He blinks a couple times, trying to ground himself. And when he finally does, he sighs.

“I don’t know.”

• ж • ж •

Jonathan Byers is an interesting character to say the least. An enigma, wrapped up in a riddle, draped in an-impossible-to-solve-puzzle. And yet, you understand him better than just about anyone else. 

What that says about you, you’re not entirely sure, nor do you really care.

He’s your best friend, your confidant, and pretty much your everything melded into one; as well as being the most constant person in your life for the better part of the past decade. You’ve known him since you were six, when you both were all bright eyed and bushy tailed, ready to tackle everything the first grade had to throw at you. And it sure had a lot to throw at you.

Your understanding on the workings of the Hawkins inner-social-circle got off to a slow start. Begrudgingly, you didn’t fit in. Not that you thought you had much of a chance to begin with. As a kid from the other side of town, you were doomed from the moment you stepped foot in Hawkins Elementary, destined to always be an outsider. Though, you weren’t the only one.

It wasn’t hard to see that you didn’t make friends easily, but that was okay, because neither did Jonathan. So when you saw him sitting all alone while the other kids played together, with more confidence than he thought anyone capable of having, you strolled up to him, arm outstretched and announced that you and he were going to be very good friends.

And he’s never doubted you since.

“You took these?” Joyce’s voice snaps you back to reality. 

Jonathan nods silently, glancing at his mom for a moment before quickly turning his attention back to the photos in front of him.

“These are great.” She muses melodically, picking one up with a sad smile. Seeing Will’s sweet grin causes her heart to yearn. He should be here. 

“They really are Jon.” You echo, placing a comforting hand on his shoulder.

He doesn’t say anything in response, but you can see how much he’s hurting.

“I know I haven’t really been there for you,” Joyce’s voice is filled with guilt. Emotionally, she’s reaching for her son, trying to get him to engage with her. “I’ve been working so hard, and I just feel so bad.” She pauses for a moment. “I barely know what’s going on with you.”

A choked back sob is all you hear. 

“It’s okay.” You urge with a coo. Jonathan has never been good at expressing his feelings, especially when they’re negative.

“What is it?” Joyce questions.

Jonathan shakes his head. He refuses to be a burden. “No.” His breathing is shallow, laced with regret. It’s that self sacrificing tone that you have to fight him on all the time.

“You can tell us baby,” she wraps her arms around his shoulders. “Please, honey, it’s okay.”

And finally, he breaks, gaze meeting yours as his eyes fill with tears.

“I should have been there for him.” You’ve never seen him look so broken. “If I had just been home, then he--”

Joyce murmurs, “Oh Jonathan.”

You feel your own eyes begin to water. “You can’t do that to yourself.” You reach over to place your hand in his. “It’s not your fault.”

A flicker of belief crosses his features, the corners of his lips lifting ever so slightly.

“He’s close.” Joyce says reassuringly. “I can feel it in my heart. You just have to trust me on this, okay?”

The two of you nod together, solemnly. You don’t know why, and you certainly don’t know how, but for some reason that is far beyond you, you not only believe her, but you share her feeling. You can feel Will.

“Oh.” Joyce’s soft laughter rings through. “How about this one?” She’s holding that picture of Will again, his smile brighter than the sun.

“It’s perfect.” You muse.

“Yeah.” Jonathan agrees. “It is.”

• ж • ж •

The next day feels like a bit of a blur, the hours melding together like they never even happened in the first place. It’s been an absolute shit show to say the least, the kids at school not making it any easier for Jonathan to simply exist. Where he once roamed in the shadows of Hawkins High as a bit of an unknown, now, a shiny red target has been painted on his back.

You almost lost it when a group of Juniors chanted ‘freak’ at him in the halls on your way to AP Bio. Among them was Tommy Hagan, who in your humble opinion, is the biggest obligatory psychotic jackass to walk this godforsaken earth. Every school has one, you guess. 

If Jonathan hadn’t have held you back from physically attacking them, you would have surely found yourself in a lot more trouble. That didn’t stop you from sending a few verbal expletives their way, after Jonathan had left for his class.

It’s not like you expected it to get any better; Will’s still missing, and your heart aches for him and his family.

You’re just, enormously frustrated, you suppose. Because while you’re more than aware that the vast majority of this town is made up of severe assholes, you thought maybe this time would be different.

Maybe, given the circumstances, people at school (and elsewhere really), would treat Jonathan better. Honestly, you blame yourself for having any faith in them at all.

Stapling another poster to the bulletin board in front of you, you grumble to yourself lightly. You can hear the laughs echoing through the hallway, the whispers that just won’t seem to stop. You’re not sure how Jonathan is doing it. He’s a better person than you, you suppose.

“Oh god.” You hear from behind you. Turning around, you glance in the direction the voice came from. Carol. 

“That’s depressing.” Steve Harrington muses. You’ve never been a big fan of his. Quite frankly, you’re just lucky Jonathan is out of earshot, because that’s the only thing that’s keeping you from jumping them right about now.

At least Nancy looks sympathetic, her eyes soft as she asks, “Should we say something?” And it’s genuine, not at all mocking.

“I don’t think he speaks.” Carol laughs. She nudges Tommy, eliciting a laugh from him as well. One word from his mouth and it’s over. 

A moment passes, two, three, then: “How much you want to bet he killed him?”

And honestly, that’s all it takes for your blood to boil over, watching as Nancy calmly makes her way towards Jonathan as he tapes another poster up. You appreciate her gesture; she’s checking up on him, making sure he doesn’t hear the vile things they have to say about him.

You on the other hand? You’re far from calm. Livid would probably be the better word.

But before you step any closer to the trio of obnoxious teens, you glance back to make sure Jonathan is occupied. And when you’re sure that he is, watching as he shares a moment of kindness with Nancy, you make your way over, red hot, and absolutely fuming.

“What a freak.” Tommy spits, eyes pouring with disgust. 

“You wanna say that again?” Your arms are crossed across your chest, stance wide. It takes you barely a second to reach them. 

“Oh look.” Carol sneers. “Trailer trash incoming.”

Hilarious, you think to yourself. It’s not like you haven’t heard that one before. Does she ever have an original thought?

You almost wish you had said that out loud.

Truly, it’s not the comment that gets to you, not really. It’s the reaction it gets from the people around her. Tommy’s laugh is unmissable. He takes a sip from the styrofoam coffee cup that rests in his hand; he’s enjoying this.

“You think this is funny huh?” Your eyes burn straight through his. 

“Enormously.” You really should have expected that response, but it still grates at your patience. 

“Well,” you leer. “If everything is this much of a joke to you, you wouldn’t mind if I just--” you grab the white cup right from his hand, unleashing the (what you’re hoping is scalding hot) liquid onto his navy sweater.

Tommy lets out a yelp of surprise. “You psychotic bitch!”

“I thought you liked a good joke,” you muse sarcastically. “Funny, huh freckles.” You say, handing the cup back to him. 

“You’re going to pay for this, you whore!”

Ah yes, Tommy’s always had this way with words. A true poet laureate.

“Oh, I’m sure I am.” Your laugh couldn’t be any more mocking. “You better remember that the next time you even think of breathing his air.” 

Tommy’s eyes follow your gaze to where Nancy and Jonathan are still standing, except now, they’re both staring at you. You should have expected your outburst to bring some attention, you just hoped it wouldn’t have been Jonathan’s.

But seeing as he’s so obviously seen and heard you by now, you may as well throw caution to the wind. What’s that cliche say? Go big or go home?

“Hey Harrington?” You chant to the boy who up until now had been entirely silent. “Because I’m sure your sidekick,” you gesture to Tommy with as much poison as you can muster, “won’t listen to my warning, I suggest you put it through his thick skull, that if he, or any of your douche lord friends try anything like that again, I’ll fucking end you.”

He doesn’t say anything, brown eyes simply pouring into yours. He never perpetuates the hate and vitriol that students like Jonathan experience, no. But he also never does a goddamn thing to stop it. That’s almost worse, you think.

He’s a bystander to the pain his friends cause, with the power to end it all. And yet, despite it all, his eyes tell you another story. You feel like maybe he understands. You feel like he’s actually listened. Even though he is a coward. 

Regardless, it’s safe to say that if King Steve (or the rest of the student body of Hawkins High) didn’t know you before, they sure as hell do now….

So much for going under the radar.

• ж • ж •

[qiangweirosa]

Thank you for taking my request! I loved it. The girls are just so amazing and I love them a lot 🩷🩷 p4 is also my favourite, the vibe there is just so nice😌🌸

Could I request some specific x reader thing? Like, I saw your latest post and ik you didn’t write headcanons before so just pick whatever form you find the easiest (and drop one character if you don’t want to do both)

This might be very specific but like, can I get something about a reader who used to be very sporty and graceful but has had a bad injury that kind of affects the way they walk and their balance. They don’t say it but they are secretly self conscious over it. They still do sports and stuff but they worry about never being enough again (and also ppl making comments about their limp). For characters that would be paired with the reader, I was thinking Mishima (love him sm🩷) and, unsurprisingly,, Ryuji (it’s a bit silly but this character helped me a bit to feel better about my situation)

Once again, thank you for doing my previous request and taking the time to read this one. I hope it’s not too heavy or self indulgent in my part, its a bit embarrassing to be fair haha

-★🐶

Mishima + Ryuji x Reader (separate)

relationships: mishima/reader, ryuji/reader tws: none wc: 462 extra: reader is gender neutral // I LOVE MISHIMA??? hes one of my favorite characters in p5 hes so silly... i actually had a lot of trouble writing this so i hope its good enough for you... dont ever apologize for being self indulgent with me i am literally the most self indulgent reader ever. ty for the request and i'm glad you liked the last one!

Mishima :

You stood in front of the diner in Shibuya, looking around with your bag on your shoulder and your phone in hand. Yuuki had texted you he’d be here in 5 minutes, exactly 5 minutes ago. You kept glancing at your screen, checking to see if he had texted you again. 

You usually tried to keep an eye on your surroundings, but you must’ve been too focused on your phone to see the crowd of people rushing into you. You tried keeping yourself up, but it was no use - you felt yourself falling over, almost resigning yourself to your fate before a pair of arms clumsily held you up. 

You looked to your side to see Yuuki, looking frantic and panicked as he slowly made sure you were back up on your feet. Just as you were about to thank him, he held you by the shoulders and yelled. 

“Are you alright?!”

After taking a second to recover, you chuckled and held onto his arms. 

“I am, no need to worry.”

He looked you over worriedly, and finally let out a sigh of relief as he saw that you were indeed alright. Yuuki brought you closer to him in a hug, which you returned. 

“Should we go inside? I don’t want you to get hurt if someone bumps into you again.”

He offered as he pulled back, taking one of your hands in his bashfully. 

“I’m not that fragile, you know… But sure, let’s go.”

He pulled you up the stairs behind him for your date. Yuuki could be a little too protective when it came to your injury, but he ultimately just didn’t want it to get worse for you. 

Ryuji :

Dating Ryuji naturally meant accompanying him on his runs, when he felt like practicing. 

Today was one of those days. You both sat down on a bench as you handed him a water bottle, which he thanked you for before drinking practically half of it. 

Your chest heaved with your breaths, trying to calm down the ache in your body as you took a break. Ryuji was sitting next to you, massaging his leg. 

“You okay?”

He glanced at you upon hearing your question. He flashed you a grin and a thumbs up, reassuring you with a nod. 

“Yeah, no worries! I can keep going. What about you?”

You nodded too. 

“Same here. Just need a short break.”

He hummed in acknowledgement, offering you the water bottle back. You drank a bit, and not long after, you two were back up and running for another lap. 

Really, you probably could’ve gone longer before your injury, and the same was true for him. Still, you two enjoyed doing this together, going at a rhythm that you were both comfortable with.