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#someone came up to me in court and told me I look like a Pakistani actress
neotan-astrology · 2 years
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Saheli
A Raazi Fanfiction.
“Tumhara rishta Pakistan mein kyun hua ye sirf hum jante hein, Sehmat. Toh apni saheliyon ko batane ke liye koi munasib kahani soch lo.”
Translation :
“Only we know why you are being married away to Pakistan, Sehmat. So think up an appropriate story to tell your friends.”
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Mitali knows something is off the moment Sehmat tells her that she is getting married and then leaving the country. She looks at her with wide eyes for a moment, almost hoping for her best friend to burst out in laughter and tell her that it was a joke, even if a very bad one. 
“Mitali?” Sehmat asks her, frowning slightly on not receiving a reply.
“But why?”
 She wants to hit herself with the largest tome she can get her hands on the next moment. That is not what you say to your friend two minutes after she tells you that she is getting married. You are supposed to congratulate her, maybe tease her and needle her for more information on her husband-to-be. ‘But why?’ Way to go, Mitali. She diverts her attention back to Sehmat, however, who is now blushing.
“Well …” she begins, then stops. “They’ve been talking of marriage for a while now, and now that our course is coming to an end, it won’t even hinder college.”
Mitali simply raises an eyebrow. “There has been talk of marriage for a while now? And you didn't tell me? Weren't you going to marry for love anyway?”
Sehmat ducks her head at this point but Mitali can see her cheeks turn a shade brighter. Her eyebrow arches higher.
“Sehmat?”
“Well… umm…” she looks up, sees her friend’s bemused gaze and looks back towards her hands toying with her pen. “We met a few months ago, when Abbu had held a party to celebrate his company’s successful expansion beyond the borders. He’s from over there, too. We’ve been communicating over letters since then. The topic of marriage was breached about a month ago.”
Mitali looks at her friend in wonder. Maybe she is a little hurt but more than anything she is baffled. She has known the girl sitting beside her since they were in third grade. Sehmat couldn't keep a secret to save her life. Even so, they told each other everything. How come she never told her about this? And how come she was going to simply leave for Pakistan after marriage and live as a housewife? 
Sehmat had plans for the future. Teaching had always been her passion. She wanted to open a school for the underprivileged children of Srinagar. Somehow the fact that she is getting married this early and giving up on her dream by her choice doesn't sit right with her. 
Her indecision about how she feels is more than a little apparent on her face, seeing which Sehmat scoots over and links her arm in hers. 
“I did mean to tell you, Titli, but somehow it never came up and I was so embarrassed, I don’t know… I’m sorry.” Mitali finally gives Sehmat a smile, although her mind is still whirring. Titli. She doesn't remember the last time Sehmat had called her by her childhood nickname. She must look very upset then. She is still far from convinced, but for Sehmat’s sake she smiles.
They turn back to their books after that—they are preparing to give their final exams for their last year in college in a few days—but Mitali finds that she cannot concentrate on the text after all. It’s not like she can be blamed, anyway. This news has hit her like a freight train for some reason, and all of it completely different from what anyone would have expected. 
They have talked about things all twenty year old girls talk about before, and she knows that Sehmat had not had any intention of marrying anyone anytime soon (a voice in the back of her head says that she could very well have been lying but she ignores it). And being married into Pakistan? Sehmat is patriotic—the Khan family is patriotic—sometimes almost to a fault. If there was one thing about Sehmat’s potential grooms that she had been certain about it was that they would be Indian. But it is not so—Iqbal Syed is Pakistani. He serves in the Pakistani Army. And anyhow, she remembers quite clearly Sehmat telling her that she was going to steer clear of any and all boys for the foreseeable future not three weeks ago.  
Something is not quite right in this entire matter, even though she cannot put her finger on it. Sehmat has never contradicted her own self this dramatically. She doesn't know why, but she gets an ill feeling on thinking about this upcoming event, a feeling that makes her feel scared for her companion. 
~~~~~~~
Sehmat knows that she has done a really bad job as far as telling Mitali about her upcoming wedding is concerned. She can lie to a thousand and ten people but she cannot lie to Mitali—she knows her too well. She tries to keep beaming and blushing as a bride-to-be is expected to throughout the conversation but she can practically hear the gears turning in her friend’s head. 
It is quite clear that Mitali is not able to digest this idea at all. Sehmat doesn't blame her, really, she has shown no inclination at all to get married in the past few months, and then she comes up and says that she’s getting married. She doesn't think she has ever behaved or felt this out of character before. She has to admit she is more oblivious than a brick wall as far as men are concerned. It has always been Mitali who tells Sehmat that the boy she was talking to was, in fact, trying to flirt with her. They would always laugh over it later on.
“...Weren't you going to marry for love anyway?” She has to cover up fast, trying to not seem as out of character as she feels and says that she was practically being courted and didn't tell her about it. She cannot even look at her when she says this for the fear of being found out. Mitali is hurt, of course she is hurt. This girl knows her inside out and to keep something like this from her… 
She does finally seem to accept it, though or at least pretends that she has, and both of them bury their heads back into a book, although Sehmat isn't really reading. Mitali can tell something is wrong even when Sehmat is trying her level best to act happy and content and as if her entire universe has not been ripped apart. She feels honoured, somewhere inside, that she has Mitali for a friend. She wonders briefly if she should say more on the topic of her getting married but then decides against it, not wanting to lie again, and no more is spoken of it.
~~~~~~~~~
After their exams and then the graduation ceremony are over she gets to see Mitali only two weeks before she is to be wed. Mitali has been in Uttrakhand for the past month, visiting her grandparents, so Sehmat really doesn't have to cover up for the extra month she has spent in Delhi undergoing training, although when they finally do meet she wonders if it really is to her benefit. Training has changed her, she knows. She is not as carefree, not as oblivious, not as lost in a different world. More than anything Mir sahab has made sure that she is always in anticipation of an attack or of getting her cover blown. Mitali notices this the moment she sets her eyes on her, of course, and then takes her to a more sheltered nook of the house to ask her if she is truly okay. 
“You look terrible, Sehmat, as if you haven't peacefully slept in a thousand days. And you're quiet. Are you sure everything is okay?” Sehmat doesn't think she has ever felt such a rush of affection for someone. She is truly, eternally grateful to God for Mitali.
She manages to somehow convince her that it is all okay, not that she thinks that Mitali is convinced for even a single second, but she isn't exactly lying when she says to her that she has turned into a bundle of nerves due to the excitement and nervousness that is a part and parcel of getting married.
~~~~~~~~~
Sehmat really laughs out loud on the day on which she is to be wed when Mitali asks her if she really wants to do this, although she isn't quite sure if she is laughing at the audacity of the question or of the situation. It’s too late now to back out anyway. Still, she pretends to be happy all through the day and quietly sighs to herself when she is finally left alone in her bedroom—minutes before groom’s party is set to arrive—and allows herself to truly thank God for giving her such a wonderful friend, a friend whom she would probably never see after this day.
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