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rainconfettis · 7 years ago

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Obligatory Coffee Shop AU Part 2

Welcome back to OCSAU! The long name is really funny to me for some reason.

I have a real tag list now????? ahhhhhhh thank you all who were interested enough

Tag List: @virgilswritings @creative-robot @katatles-the-fish @margarethx @icecoldparadise @angst-patton

Part 1

“But that's all one, our play is done, and we'll strive to please you every day.” Logan watched as the clown finished his song and bowed, then waited for the curtains to close. This was his first time watching Roman perform, and although he had a few issues with Twelfth Night, he was blown away by how good Roman was. Shakespeare was well-known, considered the greatest play-writer of all time, so obviously Logan was going to read a play or two. Nothing, however, compared to seeing it acted out.

Logan waited by the stage for Roman. As he leaned against the stage, he watched the people file out. Everyone seemed to have enjoyed the play, and those who didn’t were dragged along by someone who did. He suppressed a laughed as two siblings bickered over which couple was the most compatible, before their mother interrupted them to stop them from obliviously running into the older couple in front of them. A few people behind them was a group of friends, animatedly talking about their favorite scene, including one where Roman saved the actress playing Olivia when she forgot one of her lines. Logan thought it was incredible how he interrupted her stammering with ease, not missing a beat or even slipping out of character. He made the crowd laugh with his exaggerated hand motions, which Logan assumed were to distract them from Olivia trying to hide her embarrassment.

He felt a tap on his shoulder, and smiled. “You did-” he turned to face Roman, but instead was face-to-face with a much shorter man. Despite the height, he had a confidence that said authority, and a smile reaching his eyes that said friend.

“You must be Logan! You're waiting for Roman right?” He paused to see Logan’s curt nod before continuing, “I'm his roommate, Patton. He's told me a lot about you.” and, like a suburban father, he lowered his glasses and gave an exaggerated wink. Logan wasn't sure whether that meant Roman actually had told him everything, or Patton was trying to flatter Logan. Either way, Logan smiled politely.

“That's reassuring. He’s interested enough to discuss me with his friends. That is how it goes, right?”

Patton laughed, and although it was rhetorical, he nodded, “Yes, Roman is very interested.”

“Roman can also tell him that himself.” Logan felt a rush of- well, something- go through him. He lifted his head to see Roman on the stage. While they were talking, he had changed out of his costume and into normal clothes, but he still had some makeup on. Although Logan wasn’t sure of all the names of makeup products, he knew it didn’t usually involve this much glitter. It didn’t detract from Roman’s natural radiance, however, so Logan didn’t mind.

As Logan was examining the way Roman’s arms and chest looked in his tighter-than-average shirt, Patton had started a conversation, and it supposedly included both Roman and him. “...down the street has those comfy seats and the good crunchy ice. But that’s just my opinion.” Patton was bouncing from foot to foot, and turned to look at him, “What do you think Logan?”

Logan, who still wasn’t sure what was going on, but could deduce what was going on, said “Yes, that sounds fine.”

Roman crouched down, placing one hand on the floor of the stage and then jumping off to be on the same level as the other two. Logan instinctively reached his arm out to catch Roman when he landed, wrapping his hand around Roman’s shoulder. Both of them froze slightly, still unused to the subtle touches, and Logan dropped his hand after a lingering moment. Patton pretended not to see, but was visibly faking it with an exaggerated looking the other way with one hand on his hip, the other fidgeting with his sweater, which at this point in the night was wrapped around his neck.

Roman fussed with a strand of hair that was currently falling into his eyes, but made a clicking sound with his mouth, “I think we should get going then. We can walk.” His eyes slid over to Logan’s, and he saw mischief in those light brown eyes, “Shall we?” he bowed, exaggerated and slow, then held out his arm, inviting Logan to take his hand. Logan rolled his eyes, but happily obliged, and Patton bounced in front of them, on his phone and leading the way out simultaneously.

The night was beautiful. There was a soft glow surrounding the three as they traveled a couple blocks down. Logan wasn’t very well-versed in this part of the city, but Roman took it upon himself to point out every location he’s ever frequented. Logan made note of the light tone the actor used to describe the frozen yogurt shop across the street, and he made a personal note to visit the bookstore a few buildings down from the theatre. Maybe if he visited Roman after rehearsals, or something unimportant like that, he could, possibly, wait there. Read something new. Like Whitman. Or Cervantes. Not that it mattered.

Roman pulled, bringing Logan out of his mindscape. Logan reached his hand up to readjust his glasses, a habit, and looked at the eyes of the one whose hand he was holding, tilting his head slightly and opening his mouth to form a question before realizing Roman was holding the door to a restaurant open for him, and was waiting for him to go inside. Logan smiled, and murmured a quiet ‘thank you’ before walking in, refusing to let go of Roman’s hand and therefore pulling the actor in after him.

While he assumed Patton had skipped ahead to get them a table, it appeared that the energetic man wasn’t just third-wheeling. Logan watched as he scanned the room for less than three seconds, catching a glance of someone and immediately working his way over. Before moving to follow him, Logan shot a look at Roman, who wasn’t giving any indication of what was happening. He only looked resigned, and gently pushed Logan toward the table, since he was in front of Roman. Logan started moving, and as he got closer, he caught a glimpse of purple hair.

Coming up to the table, Patton was animatedly talking to a younger man. The most prominent features to Logan? The dark violet hair with black roots, the pale complexion, and the bags under his eyes that were actually darker than Logan’s own sleep deprived features. Or maybe that was eyeshadow. Upon further (and subtle) investigation, it was a mixture of bags and lightly applied eyeshadow that made his eyes seem very bright hazel. The rest of him seemed normal, a dark hoodie and black jeans.

Logan slid into the booth, pulling Roman in with him. It occurred to him then that they hadn’t stopped holding hands since the theatre, and took the opportunity of grabbing the menu to let go. Before he scanned the menu, he locked eyes with the man across from him, and politely waited until Patton stopped gushing about Roman’s play to introduce himself. He didn’t get the chance, however, as Roman interjected.

“Edgar Allen Woe, I would like to introduce you to my boyfriend, Logan. Logan, this is Patton’s friend.” Logan detected hints of pride when Roman introduced him, and it made his chest thump a little harder.

‘Edgar Allen Woe’ rolled his eyes and flipped Roman off, only stopping when Patton pushed his hand down, “I’m Virgil, actually. Fresh Prince of Nowhere likes to use nicknames regarding my more, as he would call it, ‘edgy’ appearance. Sorry you had to get stuck with him.” The words had no bite behind them, and Virgil and Logan smiled at each other.

“It’s alright, I’m sure I can learn how to deal with him, and I am well aware of the nicknames.” He glanced over to look at the subject of this conversation, who was content to be the subject, and repressed the urge to hold his hand once again.

The conversation would have continued had the waiter not come to take their orders, and when she left the conversation changed to whether breakfast food was better when at the time it should be eaten or when it shouldn’t. Patton and Logan thought it was best eaten in the morning, when it should, but Virgil and Roman, who had both just ordered breakfast foods, disagreed.

It stayed like this the whole night, light-hearted and open. Logan couldn’t believe this was his and Roman’s third date. It felt like a longer amount of time had actually passed. But, he thought, he was now meeting two of Roman’s friends, and they were much more knowledgeable about him than he was. He felt a pull, a longing, to be as close as they were. Not just with Roman, but the other two as well. Virgil was witty, and shared some similar opinions with Logan, and although Patton was completely opposite in personality, Logan admired the way he seemed to be the heart of the group.

And then there was Roman. Beautiful, outgoing, just a tad bit headstrong Roman. Logan never missed the way he would laugh, his eyes squinting and head thrown back. The way his hair continuously fell into his face, and he unconsciously combed it back with his hand every time. The way he checked on Logan to make sure he felt included in the group. Roman was someone he very much liked, and someone he wanted to continue liking.

After the dinner, Patton had Virgil drive him home. He said, and not too nonchalantly, that he wanted to give Roman and Logan some ‘alone time’. The pair wasn’t quite sure what they were supposed to do with that on the streets, on a Saturday night, with people everywhere, but they didn’t mind being alone. Roman once again took Logan’s hand, and they walked back toward the theatre where Roman’s car was. They didn’t speak, just listened to the noise around them. The people, the wind in the trees, and the cars. They were all an acceptable substitution for their own voices, in Logan’s opinion.

Roman drove Logan home. He was aware of where Logan lived from dropping him off after their second date, but he still needed Logan to guide him. Logan yawned as he stepped out of the car, checking his watch to see how late it was. It was late. He reached into his pocket to find his keys, and was vaguely aware that Roman was now out of the car, too. Pulling out his keys, he looked up and watched as Roman walked toward him, nervously. Logan smiled. He knew what the other was going to do. It’s been three dates, and each time, Roman was flustered and made excuses at the end of the night. Not that Logan minded. He believed in everything in its own time.

Apparently now was the time. Roman took hold of Logan’s hands, meeting eyes to be sure Logan didn’t mind, and leaned forward, pressing his lips softly against the other’s. Logan leaned down, tilting his head and relaxing into the feeling of Roman. Both were quite nervous, but when they broke apart, they grinned. Logan whispered, “You were amazing on stage. I didn’t tell you that yet, but you held my attention the entire time.”

Roman blushed, and scoffed a little, backing away enough to give them a little space, “You’re biased.”

“Well, that’s true.” Logan laughed, and Roman laughed with him. Logan placed his hand on Roman’s shoulder, and pulled him in for one more kiss, separating enough to whisper, “But you are insufferably attractive, so anyone would watch you when given the opportunity.” Roman sucked in a breath, and a smiled spread over his face, slowly, like he was dreaming.

They said goodnight then, and Logan made him promise to text him when he got home safe. When Logan got ready for bed, he pressed his fingers gently to his lips, and grinned. He was happier than he had been in a long time, and the reason was now texting him.

Home safe but you should be with me

Logan laughed and text back: Oh? A little confident after our first kiss, aren’t you?

R: I have an extensive collection of Disney movies that arent worth watching alone

L: Ah, so you’re using me to fill a space

R: That’s not all I’m using you for

L: That’s ominous yet flattering. However, I’m going to bed

R: Lame but understood

R: Gn xx

Logan took a deep breath, trying to calm his heart: Goodnight, love

#obligatory coffee shop au #ocsau #sanders sides #logince #logan sanders #roman sanders #human au #coffee shop au #someone also put in the tags they wanted this from logans pov #well i didnt know beforehand but i answered that wish

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iclaimedtobethebetterbard · 3 years ago

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@girlfaglogan OKAY i MEANT to respond to all ur comments as u made them, but then brain said no, so. i am now going to respond to all of ur tag comments from the Lore Infodumping session i have been holding the last few days at once, instead of rbing each individual post and flooding everyone’s dashes. i think i did not miss any, but if i did i apologize lol. here we go (again under a cut bc Long):

#ALSO!! REMUS WHY WOULD U FLIRT W SHAPESHIFTED JANUS WHY NOT JUST. SAY JANUS#remus i understand ur logic (not rlly) but literally evedything couldv been avoided if u were just normal /t (remus)

[post] hehehe ur correct, remus did 100% create this problem unecessarily. however from his own pov in that very specific situation it made sense. bc 1) remus has v strong adhd, so he kept forgetting to ask janus about this, and then remembered Suddenly in the scene where the miscommunication happened and was like “well i am going to do this Now while i still have the Thought in my brain.” 2) remus is extreeeemely sensitive to potential dangers in any situation featuring interpersonal dynamics, bc of his backstory that i am not talking about hehe. so, there being another superhero in the room while janus was shapeshifted registered as a Potential Danger to remus. and when he registers potential dangers like that, he is 100% committed to helping with any kinds of deception that could be protecting someone’s personal safety. so, while trying to check if it was janus or not before he forgot again, remus was also working with the assumption that it was possible janus Didn’t want the other superhero in the room to know who they were, and was like “okay, i need to not risk spilling that for them, just in case.”

so the combination of those two things is why he did the flirting thing instead of just asking. in most other situations he would have asked, but he just kept Not Thinking Of It in those other situations. it was essentially bad luck lol.

#LOGAN HAS MET PATTON. ok well then u have 2 write a scene where hes baby sitting patton.#legally . just 4 me ! /j#theyre such a family im gonna start crying

YEAH hard agree. every comment you made abt the janus & logan & patton family situation is so important and correct. they r precious and they all care abt each other sm.

#I DIDNT GET A NOTIF 4 THIS NOOOO#anyway#uhm. i have lots of things 2 say idk where 2 start#1. listening 2 music isnt 2 hard i promise !#i use spotify so it has like a uhm. discover weekly playlist that updates every monday and has a playlist of songs#based on what u usually listen 2#i also listen 2 a lot of friends recs 4 songs! so when i want a new song ill ask 1 of my friends#or mutuals 'hey do u have a song rec 4 me?" and usually they do!#if u ever need dif music 2 listen 2 plz let me know bcuz i LOVEE music and i love finding new music n genres so i am bound 2 have something#u like#i also look 4 music based on genre / subculture#ex i am punk so i look 4 punk music. i am emo so i look 4 emo music. i have friends who r goth n they look 4 goth music#i like harsh noise (the genre) so i look 4 harsh noise#if u want 2 find new music u shoukd look up different genres n pick 1 and just... type it in2 utube.#u can also branch out from ur fave artists & find what sounds like them.#sorry 4 rambling si long abt. how 2 find music help NDHSKDNSJDN#2. RHYTHMIC NOISES 4 LOGAN IS SO TRUE#i totally think he likes experimental music like harsh noise and electronica#and splittercore and speedcore and and. i could go on and on abt logans music tastes i rlly think he liks NOISES!!#ur so right...#3. fun fact: u dont have 2 put logsn thru that#i mean like. ableism towards autistic ppl exist yes but also u can just.... not include it in ur story.. no1 is forcing u 2 put it in#4. i 100% get janus .#was goinf 2 add more but i 4got wverything help#if you're going my way fic

[post]

1) you are literally so sweet thank you for all the advice aaa!! tis very helpful thank u.

2) i am going to look up all of those next time i remember to, but yessss i am glad u agree.

3) that is a good point!!!!!! i thought abt it some more after u said that, and i realized the Actual Problem i was worried about was a) allistic readers making the savant stereotype connection in their heads if i said logan was autistic, and b) autistic readers who don’t know me being concerned that *i* was doing that stereoptype on purpose. so that was the actual problem i was trying to solve. but it occurs to me i could just make a really passive aggressive author’s note about it on any of the relevant chapters instead lol, and that would be much less stressful to write. so i will probably do that instead. yay!!!!

4) im so glad u get that, because i literally had No Idea how to put my point into words there, so im delighted that i seem to have succeeded lol.

#i have many good questions cuz itz called i am autistic n this story is a hyperfixation. i think abt it a lot#constantly#do u know how AWESOME it was 2 come up w/ theories w/ my friends abt janus n going 'what is they had a teen pregancy?"#AND THEN BEING /RIGHT?/#best feeling in the world.#ANYWAY my brain stopped working but all of this is so ciol#so like.#if u have a uterus and ur on ur period u cant... shapeshift 2 make it go away or. can u? im still a little confused#id love 2 know how thatd work . id love 2 know how shapeshifting would work in GENERAL like irl.#NOT THE POINT BUT GESTURES VAGUELY#im just curious cuz like... where does it go#if ur having a period and then u shapeshift. so u rnt having a period. where does... where does it go#how does it. go away like.#HELP IDK HOW 2 EXPLAIN BUT IM JUST. .... its COOL i love thinking abt shapeshifting#also giggling at janus stabbing thingsbcuz hes angry#i think janus should stab ppl rolls eyes. LOGAN !!! LET HER KILL !!!!#if you're going my way fic

[post]

skhksdhklsjfgks 1) yes excellent explanation 2) SAME tho. i think abt this story So much. it’s great. (also. people theorizing about my fics??? is such a wild concept to me????? thats so cool?????)

more clarification about how periods impact shapeshifting powers!! bc i thought abt it more after. so:

shapeshifters cannot stop their period once it has started. they don’t entirely lose their shapeshifting powers, but they do lose some of them. basically, they’re stuck with the same, like, “base” body until the period is over. so they can’t change the height of the body, or the fact that it’s having a period, or its bone structure, or things like its digestive or nervous systems, or things like that—anything the body needs to maintain to run. they can change things like hair, eye color, fat and muscle distribution (to some degree), and so on—anything that’s not integral to the body running. shapeshifting those things is also harder than it would usually be, it takes more concentration and energy. and then once the period is over their powers go back to normal.

for how shapeshifting generally works: the shapeshifter essentially just. imagines the thing they want to shapeshift into. and then they turn into it. they do have to like, make it happen after they imagine the shape they want? like. their brain is making a command for their body to do the thing. kind of like,, intentionally blinking. it feels like that. and then the actual shapeshift happens very fast, like maybe 1-2 seconds for the whole thing. it’s usually pretty easy and doesn’t take much energy, the main exception being if they are shifting to have non-human features (like gills wings etc) or appearances (like making themself be, like, stretched-out-mike-teavee-from-charlie-and-the-chocolate-factory shape). non-human shapeshifts like those do take some extra energy to do, kind of like pushing through a barrier, and the time it takes increases to like 3-5 seconds. also healing by regenerating cells takes more energy and time too. but aside from those cases, and the period case i talked abt in the last paragraph, shapeshifting does not take a noticeable amount of energy. again like blinking. also, shapeshifters can unintentionally shapeshift in their sleep, specifically while they are dreaming. that’s more common for some and less common for others, almost like how sleepwalking is a thing for some people and not for others.

ALSO janus stabbing things is especially funny bc. it doesn’t go with their powers. and it gives them 0 advantage over their nemesis. so there’s literally no reason for them to do it, they just like stabbing things. like, viper (his nemesis) has laser powers. stabbing helps, like, 0% with fighting lasers. janus has like some mirror weapon tool things for when they actually fight viper. and viper now wears protective armor built into her suit’s stomach and chest, and has bracers on her arms. to protect from janus’s illogical stabbing habits. it’s rlly funny.

also, unrelated, but since im talking about viper: she’s a lesbian, and janus is only into men, which both of them are very happy about, because (although janus’s genderfluidity sometimes does make this a tiiiiny bit wobbly, that’s not mostly a problem) it allows them to have all the inherent gay tension of a super nemesis relationship without ever having to worry about actual attraction or feelings getting involved. they’ve literally had whole conversations about this while fighting, and they actually are pretty friendly with each other despite being nemeses. they platonically flirt while trying really hard to beat each other up. they Have given each other relationship advice while fighting before. they have literally so much fun. i love them. im going to see if i can find an excuse to write one of their fights sometimes. it’ll be delightful.

#WHY R U MEAN 2 JANUS PLEASE LEAVE THEM ALONE... /T /NM#also why doesnt janus want virgil 2 meet patton :(#if you're going my way fic#im so tired rn but this is all very cool

>:) but it’s rlly fun to be mean to them lol

part of the answer to the virgil and janus and patton question is spoilers, but also even aside from that bit. janus is a superhero. janus is very protective of their baby. janus does not want the biggest supervillain in the city to ever ever ever interact with their baby for any reason. that’s all the explanation im sharing for now, but there are more specific reasons too.

also i hope u have the opportunity to be well rested soon!!

#I AM EATING RN I CANT TYPE A LOT BUT YAYYy#lovw them lots#so ur ONLY mean 2 janus. giving logan n virgil loving parents but not him.... i see how it is... /j /nm NSHSJDND#if you're going my way fic

no no no no no, im not ONLY mean to janus!!! /lh i have also been Horrifically mean to remus!!!! :) i just haven’t talked about that yet, i’m keeping that a secret until after the next remus pov scene in the fic. after that i will be Happy to talk about it as much as ppl would like me to. but yeah, janus’s trauma does not even hold a candle to remus’s!! :D

#peregrin said a thing #if you're going my way i'll go with you #ghasper tag!!#iygmw lore

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yourneighborhooddisaster · 4 years ago

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kings of unconventional (part one) VIRGIL

This is the first part of my DLAMP soulmate AU ft. aro soulmates Remy and Remus. The first chapter is from Virgil’s POV (still third person tho, don’t worry).

Warnings: swearing, mentions of arophobia and homophobia, Remy has an asshole dad, mentions of alcohol, this story will have mentions of nsfw stuff but no direct sex.

Tagging: @emiisanxious @genderfluidmoma @my-life-is-an-artistic-mess @penguins-penguins Hopefully that’s everyone. Please ask to be tagged in the upcoming parts. I would be honored! And I love reblogs, comments, and constructive critcism. Fic under the cut.

VIRGIL flopped down on the couch with a sigh. Today had been a long day. It was some sort of sick joke the universe played on him, making the guy with extreme social anxiety the one with four soulmates. He was so tired of people he sometimes was glad he hadn’t met his soulmates, but he knew they would be different. They also couldn’t make fun of him because they were stuck with it too. Roman, Logan, Patton, and Janus, the list on his arm read. They were all in neat black print, for now. Virgil knew someone who met their soulmate in middle school, the writing changing immediately to grey lopsided chicken scratch. He at least hoped his soulmates would have legible handwriting.

“Sup gurl!” Remy strutted into the living room like he owned it; to be fair, he technically did. Handing Virgil a coffee so black it practically poisoned you, he sipped his own drink, not bothering to take off his sunglasses. They were the fancy kind that adjusted to different amounts of light, so Remy basically never took them off. Virgil mumbled his gratitude before chugging half his coffee, glad to feel the jolt to his system. “How was work?”

“Like usual. Shit.” Virgil didn’t even have to look up at his roommate leaning over the edge of the couch to know that Remy rolled his eyes. “I won’t let you pay my rent.”

“Oh come on, you know I don’t have to work, and then we could just sleep all day and party all night! Then nobody would bother us about-” Remy cut himself short, not really wanting to say it. Soulmates. Truth be told, Virgil knew Remy was under more stress than he was about the whole thing. Remy’s name was still neat black print - and he was desperate to keep it that way. He was aromantic, and Virgil couldn’t even imagine not having that attraction, and yet having a name, everything you did never really changing the fact that you felt so invalidated if you even looked at your wrist. At least Virgil was polyamorous, and gay. He hoped, for his friend’s sake, that he would never ever meet this Remus.

“You know my answer Rem. And besides, this way we interact with your parents as little as possible. You know it’s my job as the bad influence to keep you away from them.” Remy snorted, nearly choking on his coffee.

“Please. You think you’re the bad influence? Remember that time when you passed out after one drink and I-”

“Shut your damn mouth.” Remy erupted into laughter, nearly spilling his coffee.

“B-but I didn’t even-” He was struggling to speak through his laughter. Virgil huffed and chugged half of his coffee. “I hadn’t even mentioned that it was a spiked punch, it wasn’t even a real drink. You used to be such a lightweight.”

“I used to be a normal person with a functional liver and then you corrupted me, you mean bastard.” Remy snorted, then handed Virgil his computer.

“Whatever. Have fun scrolling through Tumblr for the next couple hours you fucking nerd. I’m gonna get ready to go out.” Virgil raised an eyebrow. “Oh come on, you know I always get hammered at Sandy’s club on Thursdays. And tonight I’m wearing my sequin jacket, so I have to decide which way I wanna flip the sequins.”

“...It’s five o’clock, you lunatic.” Remy sniffed and strutted to his room, not bothering to answer. Virgil sighed, opening his computer, immediately going to Tumblr. It seemed that Logan, a.k.a. logan_environmental_scientist, had a new campaign up. Virgil skimmed the post, but he stopped when he read that Logan was working with his friend Emile to help those with anxiety and depression by setting up a communal garden, something about plants being biologically calming. The fact that Logan was one of his soulmate names had never been completely out of the equation. But Virgil could hardly believe that he could ever deserve someone so smart and motivated.

“Damn it!” Virgil jumped at the yell from Remy’s room. “Dad! I can’t just-” Here he was obviously cut off. Virgil scowled. Remy’s father was a greasy businessman who was still deluded that ‘Remus’ was a girl’s name and that Remy would find his soulmate and fall in love and get married and have a son to pass down the family name. The only reason Remy still associated with his father was to receive the money he gave him. But it was not out of any kindness. His father was only concerned about the press and tax benefits. “Fine! I want an extra thousand dollars by next month then!” Remy stormed out of his room, taking the rest of Virgil’s coffee. He didn’t protest, knowing that Remy deserved it for putting up with this asshole.

“Are you okay bud?” Remy sighed.

“I’m fine, I just… Dad wants me to make a huge donation to some charity in the name of the company. Says it’s good for press. He’ll provide the money but…” Remy sat down next to Virgil. “I don’t know! I’m not his fucking researcher, and I don’t want to make his company look better. His company isn’t even that bad, it’s just the fact that it’s his. And I have no clue who I’m gonna donate to. Something local and small should piss him off.” Virgil hesitated.

“Well, I may know a worthy campaign. It’s raising money for a communal garden, and I’ve been following the guy for a while. He’s all about the environment, but he doesn’t have the funds to go bigger. And he’s gay too, which should anger your father sufficiently.” He showed Remy his computer screen and let him skim the post.

“Perfect! This is why I’m friends with you.”

“Why, because I’m stunningly clever?” Virgil joked.

“No, because you manage to simp for the right people.” Virgil stammered in indignation, hating the fact that his face reddened so easily. “Oh come on, don’t be so serious! So, which way should I wear the sequins tonight?”

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hopelessly-aro · 4 years ago

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Chapter 2: The First Conversation

Better Than It Was Before, chapter 1, chapter 3

Tags: Soulmate AU, Patton angst, coffee shop AU, fluff

Summary: The four soulmates sit down to discuss their relationship and boundaries.

Words: 2951

Pairings: LAMP

Notes: This chapter got so close to the Talking About Our Issues that it was meant to be and then I got an idea and it derailed into fluff. At this point I'm pretty sure this story is going to end up quite long because I'm not very good at sticking to a plan.

Warnings: this is all Patton's POV so slightly unreliable narrator I guess, some swearing, mention of someone being slightly drunk

Also apologies for any random British words in here. Some of it may be accidental, some of it is because I didn't want to use the American word. I hope it doesn't get annoying.

AO3

All afternoon, Patton served customers and watched his soulmates chat from across the cafe. The others had said they wanted to hang around so they could all be together properly for a while, and for the first time in his life Patton couldn't wait for the last customer to leave.

He tried very hard not to let the feeling of being left out return, as he watched them talk and laugh more and more freely while the hours ticked by, but it was nigh on impossible.

For years, Patton had a hold on his emotions, keeping them locked up and out of the way by focussing on other things. But one moment of letting his guard down and allowing hope to flood back had made that so much harder. Barely a few hours since he'd admitted to being their soulmates and he was already regretting it.

They were so happy together, was Patton capable of that anymore?

He didn't notice the way the conversation was stilted. He didn't notice the longing glances the other three sent his way every other minute. He didn't hear how many times they each held off from talking too much about themselves, not wanting to leave him out of things.

Between the constant flow of customers and the thoughts that circled round his head, blaming himself for five years of silence, how could he?

The last customer left five minutes before closing time. For all of thirty seconds, Patton wondered whether closing up early would seem too needy before Roman was out of his chair and flipping the sign on the door to closed, bringing the A-board inside in the process.

He grinned at Patton's surprised expression.

"What? I don't want to wait another minute to get to talk to you properly!"

"Aw kiddo!" Patton internally winced at his own tone. His customer service voice.

Truth be told, he couldn't really remember how he used to act around people he knew, it had been so long since- "I still have to clear up but you don't have to wait around for me, I'll be able to join in just fine!"

To his own ears, his voice sounded too falsely chipper, though he doubted the others would notice.

Logan frowned a little, looking slightly confused in an adorable way. "Patton, it would be completely irrational to have any important relationship discussions with a quarter of our group indisposed."

"Yeah Pat. Just tell us what to do, we'll help you clear up."

"O-oh." Why were they going out of their way to be so nice to him? No one ever did that. "You really don't have to! I don't mind-"

"Nonsense!" Roman stopped wrestling with the A-board to put it away and looked up. "Of course we don't have to help, but we want to. Now how does one work this blasted thing-ah!"

It seemed Roman had found the catch for the A-board for it suddenly collapsed shut in his hands.

"Oh goodness are you okay?" Patton rushed over to him. What if he was hurt? Would he be angry? Would-

"I'm fine darling, really," Roman reached out a hand to gently cup Patton's cheek, "you mustn't fret so."

Patton's heart was threatening to beat out of his chest at the touch. It sent little shivers all through him. When was the last time someone touched him?

"Indeed. Right, would it be helpful if I were to put the chairs onto the tables now, or do you need to wipe them down first?"

"N-no I cleaned them as I went..."

"Excellent."

"You got any washing up you need doing?" Virgil asked.

"Oh I couldn't ask you to do that!" Patton tried to protest but Virgil just took that as a yes and disappeared into the kitchen with an "on it" as he went.

"And I shall start sweeping!"

"Oh really Roman I can-"

"If it was good enough for Cinderella, its good enough for me. Besides," he tucked a strand of hair behind Patton's ear, making his brain short circuit, "a prince must be chivalrous for his prince."

With a wink, Roman waltzed off to grab the broom and Patton, in a slight daze, wandered over to switch off the coffee machine. His soulmates were making quick work of tidying up, and if Patton didn't know better he would have said they seemed eager to get done quickly so they could talk to him.

But Patton did know better. The three of them were far too kind to leave Patton to do all the cleaning himself, and they wanted to be done so they could get back to their previous conversation. With each other.

Not him.

He told himself he had to stop being so self-centred and focussed on clearing away the remaining cakes from the counter.

The saying "many hands make light work" proved true, and the cafe was cleared up in no time at all. They turned all the main lights off, leaving only the lamps around the sofas in the back corner switched on, bathing the area in a gentle golden glow.

It looked positively romantic.

Roman kept readjusting the lights, the cushions, fiddling with the radiator, until Logan just grabbed his arm and pulled him down onto the sofa next to him.

"Everything is more than satisfactory, please sit down."

"But it has to be perfect!" Roman protested, trying to get up again.

"Princey, if you don't stay put I swear I will sit on you." Virgil threatened jokingly, plopping down into the seat opposite him.

Roman made some very offended noises and almost tired to get up again before Patton intervened.

"It really is lovely Roman, you don't need to worry so much."

"Says you!"

Logan raised an eyebrow. "Virgil, I do not believe you have a metaphorical leg to stand on when it comes to worrying, either."

Now it was Virgil's turn to act offended and Patton felt his heart sink a little. They already knew each other, and got on so well without him. They didn't really need him.

Had he only been included in this soul bond to make sure their own love story went smoothly?

What that it?

Patton pulled himself out of his head again to sit down and listen to what Logan was saying.

"Now, I believe the main purpose of this conversation is to discus how we wish to proceed with our relationship. Does anyone have any particularly major boundaries they would like to discus first?"

I'm ace.

Patton almost said it out-loud, but then had the sudden thought that it might come off as presumptuous, and bit his tongue. They barely knew each other! He mustn't assume they would even want that sort of relationship with him.

When no-one else spoke, Patton was relieved he hadn't said anything. He didn't to be the only one being difficult.

"In that case, may I propose that we keep this relationship platonic at first? I am open to being romantic with all of you but I do not wish to rush into anything."

"Yeah, I'd prefer that too actually. I- yeah..." Virgil trailed off like he had been about to elaborate on something but thought better of it.

Roman had a strange look on his face, gaze resting firmly on his hands. "How strictly platonic do you mean? Should I...would you prefer if I stopped with the flirting?"

A light blush appeared on Logan's cheeks. "I did not say romantic advances would be unwelcome...I am just not comfortable kissing and/or dating this early on."

"I just want to keep this as low stakes as possible until I've made sure I'm not gonna screw up somehow," Virgil shrugged, "its nothing personal."

Roman seemed relieved with that answer, nodding and sitting up a little straighter (ha).

Suddenly, Patton realised they were all looking at him questioningly. Were they seeking his input on this? He hadn't raised any objections so why...?

Oh, this was another opportunity for him to say his own boundaries. He should just be honest and say it.

I'm ace.

But he didn't even want to say it. Worries about whether it was presumptuous aside, he just didn't know these men well enough to be comfortable saying it. Well, if it really came to it, he supposed he could tell them some other time.

"I'm perfectly happy to go at your paces! I really don't mind!" The whole sentence came out awkwardly, his tone sounding off, but he felt better for not telling the whole truth. He hoped the others hadn't noticed.

Barely a few hours into knowing them and he was already lying.

Truly, he was happy to have whatever relationship the others wanted, at whatever pace - he didn't want to make them uncomfortable after all. But there was a small (read: very large) part of him that would have been far happier to rush into things head first, to stop holding back, to let himself fall in love with them in one go, to shower them with the affection they deserved.

Logan, so smart and curious. Roman, dramatic and talented. Virgil all sarcasm and gentle smiles. Each one of them so different and yet so equally wonderful.

And Patton always was lead by his heart.

Sure, he wasn't in love with them just yet, and maybe he wasn't even ready to do more than just hold hands, but he knew for certain he would fall sooner rather than later. It was a bit like watching a car crash and being able to slow down time only to delay the inevitable, not prevent it. Or standing on the edge of a cliff, about to tip over, waving your arms to try to stop the inevitable descent, even though it's futile.

He didn't know what he'd do if they never loved him back like that.

With a start, Patton realised they were all looking at him again.

"Oh sorry, I totally zoned out there for a second!"

"Yeah we saw, darling."

Patton felt a jolt of panic. Did they think he wasn't interested in getting to know them?

"You okay there Pat?"

"Heh yeah, sorry what were you saying?"

"I was proposing the next item in our agenda for this evening should be to properly introduce ourselves," Logan explained. "I realise it may have made more sense to have done that first..."

He trailed off and everyone looked at everyone else expectantly. No-one seemed to want to volunteer information, which sort of made sense. The other three probably didn't have anything much new to say to one another.

"Well..." he started hesitantly, seeing the others all look slightly relieved someone had broken the silence, "you know I'm Patton, I own this place, I do all the baking and stuff-"

"You do it all? On your own?" Roman gasped. "Does that not get lonely?"

"Sounds kinda stressful."

"Indeed. I had assumed you must have someone to help out in the kitchen, or on busier days. It does not sound very efficient."

Patton was glad for Logan's comment. He would not have liked to address what Roman said.

"Oh its fine! I do all the baking in the morning and most of what I need is out the front so I don't have to run back to the kitchen for it. Sure, it gets a bit hectic in busy times, but its nothing I can't handle." He punctuated his words with a grin, hoping to just move on.

"Well if you say so..." Roman seemed doubtful.

"And I've been running it for two years so I've got the hang of it now."

"Two years?" Virgil interrupted, "wait, how old are you?"

"Twenty. I moved here and opened this cafe when I was eighteen." Then he realised the others' surprise. "Yeah, I uh didn't go to college..." God, they must think he was so stupid!

"Well thats quite alright Patton," Logan said, tone surprisingly gentle, "Not everyone is suited to that sort of education, its a very narrow-minded system, and I'd say you are objectively the most successful of all of us."

"Logan you're like, really smart, why do you dislike the education system?" Virgil asked

"Yeah pocket protector, I thought you were training to be a teacher?"

"Just because I succeeded in the education system does not mean I think it is objectively good. I hope I will be able to use better teaching methods to give more people a chance."

"It's more that my parents just didn't think I was worth the money."

Everyone turned to look at Patton.

Oh no.

He didn't think they'd hear that.

He realised he was shrinking in on himself and made an effort to sit up straighter again.

"Anyway!" he said with forced brightness, "I knew you were studying to be a teacher but what subject are you teaching, Logan?"

"Pat..."

They were all still looking at him worriedly.

"Patton darling, please don't brush that off like its nothing." Roman was looking at him with so much concern it threatened to take his breath away. "We barely know each other so I'll understand if you're hesitant to talk about it, but if you ever need someone to talk to or just a shoulder to cry on, we are all here for you, okay?"

Patton couldn't speak. His throat was tight, his mouth was dry, his eyes stung. He didn't remember anyone ever actually saying that to him, let alone making good on their promise. It was all he could do to nod and shoot Roman a smile that felt like a far cry from his bright grins. It was small and sad.

We're here for you.

If only they actually wanted to be.

"I may not be the best at giving advice, but I will certainly always make time whenever any of you need me," Logan said, looking around at them all, Roman nodding along with him.

"Yeah same. I mean, I'm not the most comforting person but I can try," Virgil added.

Patton managed to find his voice again. "And I'll always be there for you whenever you kiddos need me too," he chirped, not quite back to his usual cheerfulness but pretty close.

There was a slight pause. The silence didn't feel so awkward now, just calm and contemplative. Then...

"Pat we're all older than you!"

Patton giggled at Virgil's mock confusion, a real, natural laugh for once.

(In that moment, Logan, Virgil and Roman all thought the exact same thing: it was the loveliest sound they had ever heard.)

"Oh I call everyone kiddo! But Roman, I thought you were in your last year of college, and you said your birthday's in June so you must be younger than me!"

"I took a gap year so I'm actually twenty one. Don't you remember the time I came in here tipsy after a show?"

"You were drunk? I thought you were just extra excitable that day!"

"Patton, sweetheart, I tried to climb on a table to sing I Can Go The Distance-"

"That was YOU?!?"

Patton blinked, glancing between Logan and Virgil who'd both just spoken and were now looking at each other in surprise.

"Oh goodness!" Patton burst out laughing. (Real. Genuine.) "I'd forgotten one day you were all here at the same time! It was so frustrating! I kept getting distracted trying to see if the other two were looking at you-"

"-but I was already leaving-" Logan interjected,

"-and I walked in, took one look at the crowd of theatre kids, decided fuck that and left."

"Virgil, I believe I held the door open for you on our way out."

"Oh my god you did!"

By this point Patton was a mess of giggles at the memory of Roman, who in hindsight was obviously drunk, trying to sing one song while another played in the background, getting the tune muddled, and pretending to sword fight with his co-star from the show. Roman was fanning his hands in front of his face to try and calm himself down, Virgil was failing spectacularly to control his grin, and Logan had rueful smile, and a soft look in his eye.

"The irony is quite astonishing, that was almost a month ago."

"What a shame that it wasn't my insatiable love for Disney that brought us together."

"Nope! It was Patton all the way!" Virgil slumped against Patton's shoulder as he spoke, making Patton tense up for a second at the contact he hadn't felt the likes of in years.

"Is this okay?" Virgil asked, looking up at Patton but not moving just yet. The angle meant he was gazing through his eyelashes and Patton thought he might combust at how beautiful he was.

"Yep!" was all he was able to squeak.

Virgil leaned in further, one arm wrapping around the back of his waist, and Patton found himself sighing. He was so warm. And so real.

It wasn't a proper hug, but it was the first thing like it Patton had since he left home. And it was wonderful.

Opposite them, Roman had thrown an arm across the back of the sofa, behind Logan, like that cinema-date cliche, and Logan hesitantly lent his head onto Roman's shoulder, encouraging the other to drop his arm onto his own shoulder and pull him in a little further.

Patton reached up to card his fingers through Virgil's hair, gazing at his other two soulmates as Longan entwined his fingers with Roman's, and they both gazed back.

In the dim golden light of the lamps, in their little corner of the cafe, it almost seemed too intimate for four men who'd only met that day, and were supposed to be taking it slow, but they were all thinking the same thing - this felt...right.

~~*~~

End notes: As evidenced by the writing process of this chapter, I am not very good at sticking to plans. So even though I have one, how long it takes to get there and what happens on the way will be probably more of a surprise to me than anyone else lol

Btw let me know if its confusing who is talking at which points. When I'm writing I have a clear voice in my head for how they each speak so I can't tell if its ambiguous or not.

Well it took me a hot second but I hope you liked it!

#sanders sides #sanders sides fanfiction #lamp #patton sanders #roman sanders #logan sanders #virgil sanders #asexual patton #coffee shop au #swearing tw #drinking mention #gosh I hope this is okay #everything is chaos in my brain rn #any writers out there who are capable of sticking to a plan #how do you do it?#ro's writing

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shadowtrooper1414 · 4 years ago

Text

Ricochet

Hey, guys! I know I don’t post my own stuff often, but I wanted to share this over here for people that may or may not be keeping an eye out for it. This fic was inspired by this post, asked by @rosytheribbiter over on @delimeful‘s page. I’m not entirely sure how I did, so please be nice to me. (Also, if enough people want me to, I’ll make an angstier follow-up that is all from Virgil’s POV)

Ao3 link for those of you who prefer that

Ships: Platonic DRLAMP (but can be read as vaguely romantic) tw: blood, injury, minor swearing, talk of dueling, gross mention of eyeballs (because Remus), sympathetic Remus and Janus - let me know if anything else needs to be tagged!

-----

Being a figment of the mind was a unique thing. Roman, Logan, and Patton had never had long-lasting injuries. Any wounds they did get would vanish sooner rather than later. Most of the time, it didn't even hurt. It made sense for them - they weren't real, after all. Even with eating and drinking water, it was unnecessary. Uncomfortable, if one doesn't do it for a while, yes, but it wasn't required to live. Obviously, at first, the other sides had assumed Virgil was the same as them. However, they noticed certain things about the anxious side, the closer he got to them.

Virgil always took a sharp breath when someone stubbed their toe, or he winced when one of the others grazed the stove. He would hide away when Roman came back from the Imagination with injuries. He kept his hands in his pockets the morning Logan spilled some scalding coffee on himself in a half-asleep state. No amount of coercing could get Virgil to remove his jacket the day after Patton ran his arm into a doorframe, despite the hundred-degree weather.

On top of that, Virgil had always been wary of injury, even when they were kids. It was assumed that it was an Anxiety thing - a Paranoia thing, at the time, really - but the Light Sides were unsure if that was really the case.

It took an unexpected turn one evening. Virgil was busy helping Patton with dinner while Roman was in the Imagination with Remus. Logan had been sitting in the community room reading when he heard a loud crash and a surprised gasp from Patton.

Logan stood quickly, book forgotten, and made his way to the kitchen. When he entered, Patton had corralled an exasperated-looking Virgil into a chair and pulled his jacket off. One sleeve of his purple long-sleeve shirt was slowly turning a dark reddish color, along with a patch on his back.

"Patton, really, I'm fine," Virgil said with an eye-roll.

"Kiddo, you're bleeding!" Patton exclaimed. "You are certainly not 'fine.'"

"What appears to be the problem?" Logan asked, announcing his presence. He eyed Virgil for a few moments. "Do you need any medical attention, Virgil?"

Virgil swore under his breath before pushing himself up, grabbing his jacket from the table. One hand was pressed firmly to his stomach. "I'll be fine. Just... I need some space."

Logan gently grabbed Virgil's arm as he tried to brush past. "Are you sure you are alright, Virgil?"

Virgil seemed to not process Logan for a second, as if he hadn't even noticed him before, then shot him a smirk. "Sure am, L." He carefully pulled his arm away before continuing to the stairs, which he half-stumbled up.

Logan looked to Patton with a raised eyebrow. Patton furrowed his brow, exceedingly concerned.

"Should we check on him?" Patton asked.

Logan paused for a few moments. "I'm... unsure."

-----

Later that evening, Roman came back from the Imagination, Remus in tow. Both were boasting about the "epic" duel they'd had with each other. It took a few minutes of no questions from Patton, and no statements about the event's absurdities from Logan before either twin realized something was wrong.

"What's up, Padre, nothing to congratulate us on?" Roman asked, vaguely teasing.

Patton blinked, then shot Roman a half-grin. "Sorry, just thinking about this dueling day!"

Logan let out a groan while Roman furrowed his brow. "Dueling - like... grueling?"

"Yeah, not my best, but..." Patton trailed off to shrug. He shook his head. "Anyway, who won in your duel?"

"I got impaled, so technically, Romano Cheesy over here won," Remus said, shouldering Roman a bit roughly. Roman winced a bit.

"Yeesh, careful with that shoulder," Roman half-whined. "You can't even remember that you mercilessly slammed your mace on it."

"Whoopsie, my bad," Remus said unapologetically.

Throughout the exchange, Logan shot Patton a careful look. Patton furrowed his brow, then looked to the twins.

"You two... got hurt?"

"Yeah, but it was no big deal," Roman said. "They're already gone."

"Can't say the same for ol' Virgie, though," Remus said, sounding a bit unhinged. A heavy silence fell over the room before Remus said. "Hey Calculator Watch, pass me those eyes. I want to put them in my pasta."

"Eyes..?" Logan asked, gazing at the table where there were, indeed, eyes. An entire jar of them. Unperturbed, Logan slid the container across the table. "Remus, what did you mean by 'can't say the same for Virgil?'"

Remus hummed distractedly, pouring the eyes all over his spaghetti. "What? Oh, it's nothin'. Don't mind me."

Roman shot Logan a puzzled glance. Logan shook his head and mouthed, "Later." Roman shrugged, seemingly satisfied with that. Logan, however, was starting to string together the pieces of this worrying picture.

When Virgil came down, his shoulders tense and back slouched, Logan very carefully kept his questions and thoughts to himself.

-----

Logan decided to confront Janus about it at a later date. It took a while before he could get the tricky side alone, and the answers he got... weren't exactly straight - pun completely unintended, Patton.

"I was wondering about Virgil," Logan had started one early morning - it was before even Patton got up.

"Do not go on," Janus had replied, putting together a hot cup of tea. "I just hate sharing things about people."

Logan waited a few moments, cataloging every strange event involving injuries and Virgil. "You noticed it too, have you not? The way he hides after one of us gets hurt, or when he covers up his reaction to a minor cut or burn. Even in the way he is wary about injuries, it is... strange. And I feel like it means something."

Janus hummed softly, sipping his tea. "Well, it is not the first thing he has hidden from you three, I will give him that." He side-eyed Logan. "Why do you ask?"

"The other day, during dinner preparations, he fled the kitchen after suffering from two large wounds that could not have come from anything in the kitchen."

"And why do you think I would know what is wrong?" Janus asked.

Logan hesitated. "You... knew Virgil. Before he came to us. He had to have trusted you at some point - more than he trusts us, at least."

"Well, he's definitely not doing it because he's concerned about you," Janus deflected. "I would most certainly ask, he'd love that."

Logan sighed. "I suppose you are right, Janus. I am simply... worried about him."

Janus let out a slow breath through his nose. "Logan, let Virgil come to you. He will, in time."

Logan nodded despite his frustration with that answer. There was some shuffling from the hall before Virgil entered. He looked halfway between bewildered and exhausted. He gently bumped Logan's shoulder before resting his chin over it.

Virgil gazed at Janus carefully before closing his eyes. "Hey, L. Jan. What're you two talking about?"

"Oh, you know, the sky, space, the ozone layer," Janus said. He looked at Logan. "This was definitely not a pleasant chat, Logan, I most certainly did not enjoy it. I would hate to have another one sometime." With that, he half-sashayed out of the room. Logan watched him go, contemplating his non-answers.

"Did he bug you about anything, Lo?" Virgil asked sleepily.

"Not at all," Logan said. "I had been the one to seek him out. I had some questions for him, is all."

Virgil hummed, leaning further into Logan. "As long as he didn't bother you."

Logan smiled softly at Virgil. "Of course." He continued about his morning with Virgil literally half-asleep on his shoulder the whole time. He supposed he could postpone his investigation for a little while.

-----

The next couple of weeks passed, and Logan cataloged every out-of-place behavior Virgil exhibited when one of the others were injured. A burn here and there from Patton, some bruises from the twins adventuring in the Imagination. There was even a paper cut from Logan at some point - Logan had only seen it for a few moments, and it could have easily been dismissed. However, it had been too similar to the one he had gotten.

The next time Logan was able to document a significant injury, however, was an average Sunday afternoon. Roman and Virgil were cuddled close on the couch, debating about something or another when Remus and Janus entered, the latter limping.

Patton immediately jumped up from his place on the floor, concern on his face. "Janus is everything alright?!"

"Everything is just fine," Janus drawled, face set in a grimace. "Absolutely nothing happened."

"He fell down the stairs in the Subconscious while we were checking on the Other," Remus noted cheerfully. He plopped himself down next to Virgil. "Twisted an ankle. It'll fade eventually but probably hurts like a bitch."

Logan noticed Virgil glance down at his own ankle and wince. The anxious side cleared his throat and made to stand.

"It's getting kind of late, I should go to bed," Virgil said conspicuously.

"It's 2 PM," Janus deadpanned, moving to the couch. He gently pushed Virgil back onto the sofa, to which Virgil glared at him. "You will be going to your room."

Remus leaned into Virgil, grinning when Virgil grimaced. "Awe, c'mon, Virgie! It'll be like old times!"

"Yeah, sure," Virgil said, rolling his eyes.

Logan gently cleared his throat, drawing the attention of the three not-quite-bickering sides and the confused Light Sides. "Virgil, if I may..?" He carefully gestured to Virgil's ankle.

Virgil tensed, going pale, before looking to Janus. When Janus nodded and moved to sit on the couch armrest, Virgil sighed and rolled up his pant leg. The ankle was slowly swelling to a dark purple color.

Roman furrowed his brow. "Virgil, did you get hurt?"

"Not... exactly?" Virgil asked more than answered. He heaved a breath, fisting his hands in the sleeves of his hoodie. "More like... I took Janus's injury? I'm used to it, though. It's been happening since Thomas was a kid, so it's really no big deal. When any of you get hurt, it... ricochets to me." His voice had gotten tight and quiet near the end, and Virgil was hunching into himself. "I can deal with it myself - I usually do. Well, I did." He shot Janus and Remus a meaningful look.

Logan hummed. "So it is as I thought, then." At Virgil's surprised look, he continued. "Those few weeks ago, when you were seemingly injured out of nowhere, I decided to... try looking into it. As best as I could, anyway. I did my best not to pry into anything personal."

"Virgil, why didn't you tell us?" Patton said, seeming to just now find his voice.

"I... didn't want to make you worry," Virgil mumbled.

"You very much did not succeed," Roman said, tone gentle despite his words.

Logan stood. "If you would allow us to assist you, I will go get the first aid kit from the bathroom."

Virgil hesitated before sighing with a nod.

"Oh, I'll go bake some cookies while Logan patches you up, kiddo!" Patton exclaimed, quickly racing to the kitchen.

"Hey, RoRo, let's build an epic blanket fort," Remus said, jumping up from the couch. Roman quickly followed him, setting up the furniture so the fort would have good structural integrity.

Still perched on the couch's armrest, Janus shot Virgil a smirk. "Totally didn't tell you so."

Virgil ducked his head, face flushing. "Shuddup." And maybe lowering his head also allowed him to hide the soft smile on his face.

And that's how Virgil ended up in the middle of a cuddle pile, ankle bandaged and iced, with a Disney movie marathon running for the night.

#sanders sides #virgil sanders #logan sanders #sympathetic remus #sympathetic janus #tw: injury #tw: blood #platonic all the way #fake-title inspired #fluff #janus sanders #remus sanders #roman sanders #patton sanders #tiny bit of angst #might come back to this later

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always-anxious612 · 5 years ago

Text

Overworked and Overwhelmed (Final Chapter)

Description: Virgil is oblivious and just wants to help Roman

Genre: hurt/comfort

Pairings: Prinxiety, Logicality, platonic LAMP

warnings: crying, food mention (let me know if I missed something or if you need something specific tagged!)

Chapter 1, Chapter 2, Chapter 3, Chapter 4

Virgil’s POV

It had been a couple of weeks since the whole ordeal with Roman had happened. It felt like everyone was stepping on eggshells, just trying to go back to how everything was, but knowing that nobody really could. Still, we all at least tried to create a semblance of normalcy around the place. Patton still made breakfast and dinner. Logan still nagged us all about our sleeping schedules and drinking adequate water. I still worried about every little thing (although the worries may have shifted to focus mostly on Roman now), and Roman…well, Roman was just trying to pick up the pieces of his confidence.

At first, he did his best to put on his act once again. To pretend that he was ok. To act like he had everything all together. But we had seen him crumble. And we assured him that it was ok to…to not be ok. And then there was still the whole relationship thing to work out. Apparently, Patton and Logan had confessed to each other while I was asleep. Finally. But…well Roman and I—well, I still wasn’t sure if he knew what he said that night. He hadn’t brought it up and I hadn’t wanted to stress him out more by trying to figure out romantic feelings along with everything else.

“Kiddo?” Patton’s voice rang out from the kitchen. “Will you go and get Roman? Supper is almost ready.”

“Sure Pat.” I muttered, dragging myself up from where I’d been on the couch and walking up to Roman’s room. Once I got there, I raised a hand to knock, but the door swung open before I had the chance to.

Before I knew it, Roman had wrapped me in a hug and buried his face in my shoulder.

“Um, you ok, Ro?” I asked, gently wrapping my arms around him. Roman’s sniffle and hitched breath answered my question, and I just held him tighter.

“What’s wrong, Ro? Having trouble with a project?” I prodded after a short silence. Shaking his head, he pulled away slightly and wiped at his eyes.

“No, it’s stu—It’s not...It doesn’t make any sense.” Roman stammered, searching for a phrase that wouldn’t be self-deprecating. At least he was getting a little better at that.

“What doesn’t?”

“It—I don’t know. I don’t know why I feel bad. I d-don’t have a reason. Everything is going well. Everything is on track. I—” he cut himself off as another tear slid down his face, making my heart ache. I certainly knew what it felt like to have no reason for feeling bad. I also knew how horrible it felt to feel like you were bothering someone without even having a reason for making them worry other than you feel bad and don’t know why, but I had no idea how to make it better except to reassure him. I had to try to help somehow.

“That’s ok, Ro. It’s ok not to know what’s bothering you.”

“But—” he started only to cut himself off once again, this time seemingly at a loss of how to explain.

“It’s not stupid or pointless to feel bad and not know why. It’s super frustrating, yeah, but not stupid or pointless. There’s most likely a reason or even several reasons for the way you feel that you just can’t see right now. Feelings are confusing and most of the time don’t make sense in the moment. You have to let yourself feel bad, Roman. I know it sucks, but it’ll help if you just let your feelings out. Let yourself cry. Let yourself be sad. Just remember that it’ll pass and that we’re here for you.” I assured after his continued silence, ignoring my slight blush as I took one of his hands.

“Ok?” I confirmed. He smiled tiredly, wiping the rest of his tears away and nodding before leaning over and pulling me into a kiss. I gasped softly but quickly melted into it, wrapping the hand that wasn’t gripping his around his waist. When we pulled away, we were both breathless, bright red, and smiling.

“Wh-What was that?” I asked once I recovered slightly.

“It was a kiss. Oh, um, sorry. I guess you still weren’t ready, huh.” Roman apologized, looking down.

“W-Wasn’t ready? What are you talking about? How could I have been ready? We aren’t even together?”

“What do you mean we aren’t together? Aren’t we dating?” he asked, looking thoroughly confused.

“Dating? Since when?”

“Since I said I love you and you said it back?”

“You—You were—I didn’t think you were coherent when you said that. I thought you were just tired. Have we been dating all this time? Why haven’t we kissed before now?” I rambled, thrilled and dumbfounded at the same time.

“Oh gosh. You really didn’t know. We were literally cuddling just the other day. But then you were distant when I did romantic things, so I just assumed you wanted to take it slow and didn’t want to kiss yet.” Roman explained, on the verge of laughter.

“Wha—what romantic things?” I blanched.

“What do you mean ‘what romantic things?’ I made you coffee the other morning with a heart in the foam.”

“Ok, to be fair. I tend to drink coffee in one gulp and am barely sentient in the mornings.”

“Then I put on a movie and we got a bunch of snacks and cuddled all night.”

“I thought that you just wanted a movie night.”

“Virgil, we had a candlelight picnic dinner under the stars in the imagination.”

“I-I thought that friends do that too?” I offered weakly. Roman raised an eyebrow before he couldn’t help it anymore and burst out laughing.

“I can’t believe you didn’t—You thought—oh gosh Virgil this is hilarious.” He cackled.

“Sh-Shut up. I’m unobservant when it comes to flirting.” I huffed, trying to push down the overwhelming blush trying to climb onto my face.

“It’s ok, storm cloud. Even though it was more full out dates than flirting that you were unobservant of.” He smiled, still letting out a few chuckles here and there. “Well, now that you know, we—you do want to date right? I mean, it’s ok if you don’t, I just—” I cut him off quickly, by pulling him into another kiss.

“Yes.” I whispered when we pulled away. He beamed and pulled me into a bone-crushing hug.

“Can’t breathe.” I gasped with a small giggle.

“You’re adorable.” Roman muttered, voice muffled since his face was still buried in my hoodie. My face burned once again as I stammered for a reply. Roman only laughed and pulled back with a bright smile. Well, at least it seemed I had distracted him from the bad feelings for now.

“Ok, now that that’s cleared up. Patton said that dinner was ready. It’s been about thirty minutes since then so we should probably go.” I urged, checking my phone for the time.

“Hmm, alright; but after dinner, first cuddles and movie marathon as an official couple?” Roman offered hopefully, taking my hand.

“Of course, Ro.” I grinned squeezing his hand as we started toward the kitchen. As Logan’s voice and Patton’s giggled drifted out of the dining room and with Roman’s hand gripped firmly in mine, I really believed things were getting better. Sure, things were different, but different wasn’t always bad. We were all struggling, but none of us were alone. And as for Roman, now that I actually knew we were dating, I’d make sure that he felt loved. I’d make sure that he knew it was ok to be sad. I’d make sure he knew it wasn’t bothering me to come talk about his problems if he needed it. I’d give him everything I wished I had but was too scared to ask for when I was in the place he was now. And overall, I knew he’d come out of this stronger. We all would. Our famILY was a little broken and very battered, but with a little rest and a lot of patchwork, we’d be ok again. For now, though I was content to just listen to the others’ laughter and savor the little moments. Looks like the patchwork had already begun.

Taglist:

@catolicabuena

@patches-of-mist

#tw crying #tw food mention #sanders sides fic #sanders sides #roman sander #virgil sanders #patton sanders #logan sanders #sanders sides angst #prinxiety #logicality #platonic lamp #my fics #thomas sanders

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anxiouslyfred · 4 years ago

Text

Love After Exile - All Dating?

Authors Note: we’ve reached the conclusion and I can’t wait for some time to pass so I can read this all anew for myself

Summary: Virgil loved Remus and Deceit long before they fell out. Now he’s dating Logan after beginning to recognise similar feelings. They’ve been having game nights together for a while, and Virgil’s starting to wonder if the offer might be repeated when Remus says something a little unexpected.

Formatting: There’s a shifting POV, anytime you see Bold starts of a paragraph then there’s been a perspective shift.

Pairings: Analoceitmus

Warnings for this part: suggestive talk, quite a few mentions towards sex

/\/\/\/\/\ Part One /\ Part Two /\/\ Part Three /\/\Part Four /\/\ Part Five /\/\ Part Six /\/\ Part Seven /\/\/\/\ Part Eight /\/\/\/\

Remus couldn't be happier than he had been over the last few weeks. Virgil wasn't scared by his outbursts and actually welcomed his visits again. He'd even gotten to argue with Logan more while just hanging out in the living room and Dee was slowly joining them all more often without the random pretences he thought had been needed.

It wasn't often that his intrusive thoughts were as calm as they had been but with the games there was even an outlet for them. "We could stay here forever and I'd be happy with You all." he sighed, never one to shy from sharing his thoughts.

Conversation paused at his words which was the first Remus realised they'd been discussing the next game they could play rather than anything related to his enjoyment.

" I'm glad to hear that Remus. Are you attempting to say you'd like to play one of our games with your statement or just generally expressing your feelings?" Remus couldn't help but smile and relax at the slightly confused, slightly flattered tone Logan spoke with.

Inside Virgil's mind the words were spinning around. It fed into one of his main worries that Deceit and Remus had actually decided to just put any feelings beyond the platonic behind them after his earlier reaction.

"You're actually happy just hanging out with us? Neither of you has brought up what happened in the imagination since our first chats after it happened." Virgil had been expecting a repeat request sooner or later but even after Dee joined their game nights nothing was said.

He wasn't sure what to think, and honestly feared any answer to his question as it fell far too close to the ones he'd already been thinking: Did Remus and Dee decide they didn't want to date them after all? Were they just being careful to give him time to speak his emotions now? He couldn't be sure and being anxiety that meant sooner than later he'd have to challenge what was going on.

Above all he dreaded hearing that he'd missed the chance he'd been given to be with the people he first fell in love with. To have his rightful reluctance to trust them deprive him of any chance to date them as the trust is being rebuilt.

"We're happy with whatever relationship you are comfortable sharing with us, Virgil. If friendship is all you are comfortable with then we are delighted to simply be your friends and share these evenings with you." Deceit's words sounded like he intended to comfort Virgil but they were too vague for him to believe.

A glance at Logan had him wondering if his doubts were unfounded as Logic was looking quietly pleased as though finally understanding something which had puzzled him.

"Wow, it's like you have no clue just how many concerns and worries I can come up with from that sentence. Has it been too long since you took a turn helping me with anxiety?" The sarcasm might have been exaggerated, and probably a little too much but Remus jumping to wrap around him was a perfect response.

"My thunderclap. We're idiots and have no clue how to act so you aren't feeling pressured to be with us while still showing we want to be with you. Tell me how and I'd do anything you want, even follow the Disney chased lemmings off a cliff." Remus crooned, leaning his head over Virgil's shoulder once he was able to sit behind him properly.

Virgil easily leant back into him, watching the shocked expressions flitting over Logic and Deceit's faces. It couldn't be any clearer that they'd both thought their interest was evident. "Right, let's leave jumping off cliffs for someone else to do. I worry about you enough without adding that to the mix."

"Oh what else can I mix together? What's already in there?" Remus was bouncing in his seat with ideas, nuzzling into Anxiety's neck intermittently. He'd seen the door of chance opening and even if it left Deceit staring he was going to grab it by the balls and party.

His people just blinked back at him before Virgil started snickering. "I think we're already trying to add romance into it, so we can probably wait a while before you offer any suggestions."

"So we aren't starting with a decision of kinks or me trying to find all your erogenous zones? Shame, sounds like a fun focus." he shrugged.

Logan's frown and Deceit covering his face were milder reactions than he could have gotten, but Virgil's reaction was the most interesting. He shuffled in Remus's hold until they were facing each other, tilting his head. "Well it would help us know how to get you to back off things we might not be ready for. You've always preferred to have a safe word rather than unbending boundaries."

"You're going straight to safe words without confirmation of everyone's relationship status? I think some more clarity would be useful in this conversation." Logic stated, unflinching under Creativity's gaze.

The turns of the conversation had left Deceit a little dumbfounded.

He'd forgotten to include anxiety in his calculations over how long to wait to ask to date Anxiety and Logic again and thinking about it like that made him feel more than a little imbecilic. Of course Virgil would eventually challenge them over their emotions and actions.

That didn't mean Deceit knew how to respond to Remus turning the conversation from not just confirming they still wanted to date Virgil but straight to sex and kinks.

"I agree, Logan. Is this your way of saying we can all date now or just confirming our interest, Virgil darling?" he asked, silently praising Logic for his question by squeezing his knee.

Anxiety hesitated, thinking for a moment before responding. "Both. You've been building trust for like 3 months now, dude. Did you think I'd be that slow to trust You?"

"My dear Einstein, are you okay with the change also?" Of course Deceit had to ask Logan as the one person that had not spoken up with a view since the subject began.

He could see thoughts and ideas racing through Logan's mind at the question even as a gentle smile formed on his lips. "I believe I've already agreed to date the both of you so long as it didn't cause so much concern to Virgil." the agreement was enough for Dee to move from his seat to beside Logan.

"Then can I suggest we change tonight from a games night to either a date or a discussion of everything that Remus is already about to bring up?" it seemed only reasonable but the bouncing head shakes were enough to show Remus had his own ideas.

Back when Remus had been planning to ask Virgil and Logan out with Dee he'd come up with a grand location for a date and so many idea of what they could do all together or individual date he could take Anxiety or Logic out on. He had put those ideas away after Virgil's reaction but still remembered them and could for the imagination into them quickly.

Now they were finally all dating he didn't want to wait to whisk them away. "I have a perfect location for our first date we can got too right now!" he insisted.

The agreement was given far more easily than he'd expected given Deceit had always protested imagination dates since they got together but Remus was just thrilled to be able to lead them all off to his place for them.

Of course he tried to reassure them that their destination was only surrounded by the swamp and not just the centre of it but his cackling didn't help in convincing anyone. He was just so overjoyed now.

All 3 of his people were his boyfriends too and they would let him arrange dates like this one for them. It was the best thought ever.

Once Virgil was kicked out by two people he knew he loved but now he could follow the three people he loved and adored through a swamp for what was sure to be just the first adventure of many more.

Tags: @cheshiren @book-of-charlie

#virgil sanders #remus sanders #deceit sanders #Janus Sanders #logan sanders #analoceitmus #getting together #suggestive conversation

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today-only-happens-once · 5 years ago

Text

the only exception

Title: the only exception

Word Count: 4,549

Summary: College!AU, Musician!AU. Patton shows up to a music festival that Virgil—along with his twin brother, Roman—is headlining, hoping to surprise him. Turns out, it’s Virgil that surprises him first. Romantic Moxiety, brief background Logince. Song-fic.

Warnings: lots of fluff and softness and sappiness, mutual pining elements, declarations of love, description of crowds, cursing, discussion of anxiety, mention of anxiety attacks, kissing, Virgil “writes” a song that’s actually written irl by Paramore but ssshhh Paramore doesn’t exist in this AU, please let me know if I forgot anything.

A/N: Someone on tumblr once made a textpost that said “The Only Exception” was a Moxiety song, and weeks later I listened to it and realized they were right. And then I had this image in my head that wouldn’t go away for like. Months. And then eventually I decided to write this. It’s basically a song-fic. Crazy self-indulgent, heh. Also, I’ve never written Romantic Moxiety before, nor have I written a Patton-POV focused fic. So writing this was a whole boatload of new. I hope it turned out okay! Edited by yours truly, so all mistakes are mine.

You can listen to the song Virgil sings at the end here!

Tags: @creativenostalgiastuff, @helloisthisusernametaken, @ren-allen, @quoth-the-sparrow, @princelogical, @random-pianist, @ravenclawicecream, @erlenmeyertrash, @milomeepit, @at-least-seven-pretty-potatoes, @rileyfirstname, @pinkeasteregg, @sassy-in-glasses, @vigilantvirgil, @generalfandomfabulousness, @lacrimosathedark, @thepoolofthedead, @monikastec, @heir-of-the-founders, @yourworstnightmare999, @artistictaurean, @kanejandkruge, @cdragontogacotar, @damienswifeolicitydallysgirl, @angst-patton, @savingshae, @noneed4thistbh, @awesomelissawho, @unikornavenger, @bopthesnoz, @spiralofsilencetheory, @finger-gunsss, @crownswriter123, @swlotakulady34, @gaylotusthatexists, @analogical-mess, @dolphidragon, @flix-net, @narniasfinestavengingsociopath, @friedlieb-ferdinand-runge, @bibbidy-bobbity-booyah, @procrastinations-my-middle-name, and also @randomslasher because moxiety! ^u^

…

Present. March. Junior Year.

Patton shoulders his way through the crowd as rock music blares loudly over the speakers. The late March air is cool, and the breeze tugs at the COLLEGE-PALOOZA MUSIC FEST banner hanging from the amphitheater’s stage. A few people he recognizes from his classes wave to him as they nod their head to the music. Patton slows as he finds a small gap in the crowd, not particularly keen on getting into the tightly packed mosh pit that had formed right in front of the stage.

The sun is beginning to set, casting the sky in a light purple hue. Perhaps ironically, it reminds Patton of the guy he’s actually here to see perform. Patton glances at the stage, but there’s no sign of him. He checks his phone for the time. The group was supposed to be on now, but perhaps he’d missed them already.

He looks at the guy beside him—leather jacket and sunglasses, holding a Starbucks cup—and asks over the music, “Which group is this?”

The guy takes a long swallow and then jerks his head towards the stage. “Planets Align. They had trouble getting the sound system working, so they’re running behind.”

Patton nods his understanding, smiles, and thanks him. Planets Align was scheduled to go on right before them, if the pamphlet he’d found on Virgil’s desk was anything to go by. He’d felt terrible at the time when he realized that the band Virgil had formed with his twin brother, Roman, would be headlining a music festival the same day Patton had already promised to help with a group project.

But the other members of his group canceled the meeting earlier today and rescheduled it for next week. So Patton really didn’t see any reason why he couldn’t come support Virgil. And if he maybe didn’t tell Virge in the hopes of being able to surprise him… well.

Besides, he had a feeling Virgil could use a nice surprise. He’d seemed really nervous about the festival when Patton was talking to him about it when he found the pamphlet. Virgil often seemed nervous, but… more nervous than even Virgil’s normal.

Patton smiles a bit to himself when he remembers when they first met.

…

September. Sophomore year.

“For the purposes of this research presentation, I will allow you to choose partners. We will need one group of three, but that certainly seems manageable.”

Patton glances around the stuffy lecture hall. It was only the third time the class had met, so Patton hadn’t had the opportunity to talk to many of his classmates yet. On top of that, it was a pretty big class. Patton had a feeling that he wouldn’t know everybody even by the end of the year. The professor waves her hand to indicate that they should select a partner and begin discussing the project.

Chatter rose up—most people leaning over towards people they were sitting next to, a few calling to friends across the room—and there was shuffling movement and the scraping of chairs as students milled about to find a research partner. Then Patton caught sight of a black and purple hoodie in the back row.

What was his name? Patton couldn’t remember, despite the ice breaker during their first class. He does remember the snort the guy had released when Patton had made a pun about his name when introducing himself. He also remembers the way he’d immediately ducked his head a second later when Patton grinned at him.

Patton gathers his things and squeezes through his classmates. “Hey,” he says. The guy in the hoodie looks up, seeming startled. “Wanna be partners?”

The guy blinks at him, then shifts in his seat and motions to the empty chair on the other side of his desk. “Uh, yeah. Sure.”

“I’m Patton, by the way.”

“Virgil. What, uh, what are you studying?”

Patton pulls his laptop out of his bag. “Oh! I’m an early education major. What about you?” As he asks, Patton casts a quick glance at the laptop in front of Virgil and notices the stickers on it: SANDERS in messy black scrawl, a thundercloud with a bolt of lightning, a small circle with a paint-smear style gay pride flag, and a few music notes.

“Graphic design with a minor in music,” he replies. Patton notices him glancing at the buttons on Patton’s backpack that he threw in the empty chair beside him—some about cats, some about dogs, a heart with glasses that he thought was cute, and a pride pin from last year’s Pride week.

“That’s pretty cool. You play music?”

Virgil lifts a shoulder. “With my brother, mostly.”

“Wow. That’s… really awesome,” Patton says, sincerely impressed. He’d always loved music, but really only dabbled in the ukulele. He’d always thought musicians were cool: having skills like that took a lot of work, and a lot of dedication. That seemed pretty admirable to Patton.

Virgil smirks. “If you say so.”

“I do. I mean it.” For a fleeting moment, Virgil looks taken aback by the insistence in Patton’s voice. “What do you play?”

…

Present.

“Roman is totally the hot one,” Patton hears a girl behind him say to her friends.

“Elliot thinks he has a crush on Logan Berry, you know.”

“He’s gay?” The girl sounds surprised, but not hostile.

“Ace, I think. Panromantic, if the stickers on his laptop are anything to go by.” Patton recognizes that voice as one of the girls in the LGBTQ+ club that Patton was secretary for.

“You have class with him?”

“We had English 100 together freshman year. Elliot’s in class with him and Logan, though, and says they want to gag literally any time the two so much as talk to each other.”

Patton grins to himself. Subtlety when he had a crush had never really been Roman’s strong suit. That was another place where Virgil was markedly different from his twin brother. Both Roman and Virgil had ways of keeping their distance from others, but where Roman put up a front of fearlessness and confidence and friendliness… Virgil seemed more likely to withdraw into himself.

Patton had learned that, and many other things about Virgil, slowly as meetings for the research project gradually developed into hanging out regularly and casually. Patton picked up on things about Virgil relatively quickly. He gets quiet and irritable when he’s actually anxious about something. He tends to catastrophize, especially when it comes to academics. He hasn’t yet learned how to accept compliments—something Patton didn’t let deter him from giving them. He hopes that the more he’s able to expose Virgil to them, the easier it will eventually get for him to accept them.

Patton learned that Virgil is fiercely protective, too. The fastest way for Virgil to overcome his anxiety about a situation is usually when it’s related to someone he cares about. He still remembers the fire that had alighted in his eyes when someone had started harassing Roman when he, Patton, Roman, and Logan had been heading back from a party on a Friday night a couple of months ago. Logan had been the one to diffuse that particular situation, but Patton hadn’t missed the way Virgil hovered closer to his brother and looked ready to fight when he’d seen the shaken look in Roman’s eyes.

But then there were the softer moments from Virgil, too. The fleeting moments when Patton saw something gentle and relaxed from him that a secret part of Patton liked to believe were just for him. They were a sign of trust from Virgil, and Patton had always cherished that trust precisely because it was so rare.

…

April. Sophomore year.

“What time is it?” Virgil asks with a yawn. He’s sitting on the floor of his dorm, his guitar in his hands. His back is leaned up against the drawers of his desk. Patton sits on the floor across from him with his back against the cinderblock wall and his legs stretched out in front of him.

Patton digs his phone out of his pocket and checks. “Almost 1 in the morning.”

Virgil nods and strums a few chords softly. “You’re welcome to stick around, Patton, but… y’know. It’s chill if you’d rather go home.”

Patton shakes his head “I like it here,” he says. For reasons he is still figuring out, there’s nowhere else he’d rather be.

Patton watches him; he watches the way Virgil’s bangs fall in a soft sweep across his face, the dark eyeshadow smudged under his eyes, the slight parting of his lips as he mouths unheard lyrics. He always loves watching Virgil play guitar. There’s something about watching him hold the light brown acoustic instrument—like it steadies him, like it’s a shield that protects him—that Patton can’t help but love. Virgil seems to… breathe easier when he has a guitar in his hands.

“Virgil? Can I ask you something?” Patton says suddenly.

Virgil glances quickly at him, then back down at the guitar in his hands. Avoiding his eyes. “Yeah. Sure.” His voice sounds oddly tight to Patton.

“Why do you play music?”

The question seems to catch him off guard. Virgil stops short for a moment, glancing back up at Patton. His hands still against the instrument, his eyes flit away in thought.

Then—to Patton’s surprise—he sets the guitar aside.

“It… gives me a space where I can… connect, I guess?” He rubs the back of his head, glancing at Patton as if unsure whether or not his own words made sense.

“Connect?”

“Well,” Virgil pulls his knees up to his chest and rests his chin on top of them, “Yeah. I’ve never been good at… at the whole…” He waves a hand and sighs. “At the whole ‘words’ thing that’s required for making friends or helping someone or… whatever. I’m always afraid I’m gonna say the wrong thing, or make them feel awkward, or… shit, I don’t know. But music is different. It…” He huffs a frustrated sigh as the words escape him. Then he tosses Patton a wry smile. “See what I mean? Words aren’t really my thing. Music is different, though.”

Patton nods. He glances around at the MCR and Dear Evan Hansen poster on walls of Virgil’s side of the room. “I think I get it. Music lets you speak from where you are emotionally at a given moment, and people can come to you—or your music—to find that connection and community. It… lets you express yourself, and by doing that, lets you connect to other people.”

When Patton looks back at Virgil, he’s looking at him with something like disbelief. But there’s a softness and light in his eyes that makes Patton’s stomach flutter. “Yeah,” Virgil says eventually. “Exactly.” Patton meets his gaze with a small smile, even as he feels suddenly like Virgil can see all the parts of himself that he wants to hide.

The corner of Virgil’s mouth quirks slightly and he digs a small purple leather notepad out of his back pocket. He grabs a pen from the top of his desk and scribbles something down.

“Whatcha writing?” Patton asks curiously.

Virgil folds it and slips it back into his pocket. “Nothing, Pat.” He still has that soft kind of smile and look in his eyes even as he grabs his guitar and pulls it back into his lap.

…

Present.

“Ladies and gentlemen, give it up for Planets Align!” The emcee shouts into the mic as he runs on stage and the band waves as they exit to the cheers of the crowd. Patton applauds them and briefly considers moving closer to the stage before deciding against it. He’d never done well with tight crowds.

The sun has dipped below the horizon now, the sky darkening quickly. The lights from the stage bleed out onto the grass clearing, providing some lighting of the crowd itself as well. The air is a bit colder now, but Patton doesn’t mind. Besides, all the people around him moving and dancing have helped keep it from getting too cold anyway.

“Next up, the ones you’ve all been waiting for. Let’s hear it for… SANDERS!”

Patton lets out a cheer as the crowd screams. He sees Virgil’s twin brother—though you’d never know it from how differently they do make up and their hair—run on stage with his arms up to encourage the crowd’s response. The cheers get louder, and Roman grins and strikes a hero pose. He’s energized. Patton smiles at his evident excitement.

Virgil follows behind him, an electric guitar strapped to his back. Even from his distance from the stage, Patton can see him shaking his head at his brother’s antics. He gives a small, appreciative wave to the crowd. His eyes scan it, and a part of Patton can’t help but wonder if he’s looking for him someone.

Reasoning, though, reminds him that Virgil said he always tries to get a feel for the size of a crowd when he goes out on stage at a venue for the first time. It had started as a nervous thing—how many people might see me fail?—but as Virgil’s confidence in performing grew, it had mostly just become a habit.

“What is UP, everybody?” Roman says into the mic. He’s wearing a bright red leather jacket with a white shirt underneath, shiny gold skinny jeans, and red high top converse. “We’re so glad you could come out tonight. How about this awesome weather, yeah?”

More cheers. Patton watches as Virgil pulls the guitar from around his back with a smile. He’s in his familiar hoodie, purple shirt, black ripped skinny jeans, and his black sneakers with purple laces. At first glance, he doesn’t seem too nervous—Patton had long ago gotten in the habit of glancing at him to check if he’s okay when he knows Virgil might be getting anxious—but it’s hard to tell from this distance.

“My brother, Virgil, and I thought we’d kick things off with an original song. How’s that sound, guys, gals, and nonbinary pals?” There’s louder cheering, and the two of them waste no time starting a song that Patton remembers from previous concerts of theirs he’d attended.

…

November. Junior Year.

Patton’s phone dings while he’s eating lunch in the student union and flipping through an education textbook to study for his quiz tomorrow on Vygotsky’s Zone of Proximal Development. Exams are quickly approaching, and Patton had always struggled to remember theorists’ names for some reason.

It’s a text from Roman. Is V with you?

Patton frowns and types back quickly. No. It’s Tuesday. Then he sends a second text. Why?

The student union is bustling with students breezing through to grab lunch before rushing off to the library or their class. Groups are clustered around tables to hash out the details of final projects as their deadlines approach in the next week or two. Exhausted English majors slump over their stale coffee cups and computers as they edit their final paper for the eighth time. Engineering students running on caffeine and spite chug another energy drink before hurrying off to the lab building. A couple others that Patton can see are watching Netflix in a desperate attempt to give themselves a break before plunging back into the grind of end-of-the-semester assignments.

Roman’s reply comes almost immediately. He sent me a single letter text which usually means he’s freaking out but idek where he is

Patton stands up and forgets his half-eaten sandwich, dropping it in the compost bin as he slings his backpack over his shoulder and hurries out of the building. Have you tried calling him? He texts quickly.

R: Yeah. No response… just lemme know if you see him or if he texts you or something ok

Patton rolls his eyes. As if he’s just going to go about his day and not try to help. Especially if V might be freaking out. We’ll find him, Roman. You check the science center and I’ll check the music floor of Stokes Hall.

R: ok.

R: Thanks

Patton turns his ringer on at full volume and braces against the cold air as he hurries to the building beside the Student Union. The November air is biting. Students bustle with their noses tucked into their scarves and red fingers curled around coffee cups. There was no snow on the ground, but the grass still crunches under Patton’s shoes as he hurries across the quad towards Stokes Hall. His light blue beanie is pulled low over his light brown hair.

He’s wishing he had a scarf to hide his nose in—instead opting to try to tuck it into the sleeves of the sweatshirt tied around his shoulders—when he walks straight into someone.

“Shit! I’m so sorry—”

“Virgil?” Patton asks, immediately recognizing the voice. He looks up, and Virgil seems frozen for a moment. It only takes Patton a second to realize that his eyes are red and sunken slightly. His usual sweep of hair is a disheveled mess under the hood of his sweatshirt that engulfs his frame.

If Patton’s being honest, he looks… rough. Concern twists in Patton’s chest.

“I’m so sorry, Patton. I’m an idiot, I just wasn’t watching where—”

“Hey, it’s all good, Virge,” Patton says, quickly but sincerely. He places his hands on Virgil’s shoulder to anchor him. “Breathe.”

Virgil laughs but it’s humorless and shrugs out from under his grip. Patton frowns. “I’m fine. I know I look like a mess, but really. It’s fine now. I was just. Um. Coming outside for some air.”

Patton considers the deflection and decides to meet Virgil half-way. “I could use some too.”

“You don’t have to do that—”

“Honest, V. The cold air is kind of nice.” Patton slips his phone out of his pocket and sends a quick text to Roman. Got him. He offers a small, reassuring smile to Virgil.“ You wanna take a seat?”

Virgil meets his gaze, then glances away. He seems to think about it for a moment, then relents with a slight sag to his shoulders. “Sure. Fine.”

Patton wanders over to a bench across the pathway and takes a seat. He looks around as students rush quickly towards their classes, smiling brightly as a service dog trots dutifully beside his owner and pushes the button to open the door as the student hurries inside. He intentionally keeps his gaze from lingering on Virgil, even as he hesitates before sitting beside him.

Virgil waits until most of the students have rushed off before breaking the silence between them. “You aren’t going to ask?”

Patton glances over at him. “I didn’t want to make you uncomfortable, and you seemed reluctant to talk about it…. Should I ask?”

“No. Yes?” Virgil groans, zipping up his hoodie against the chilly air. “It wasn’t anything like. That bad. Y’know? I just get… anxiety attacks sometimes, and sometimes they get…” He trails off. Patton senses more than sees the way Virgil glances quickly at him. “Anyway. I’m fine now.”

Patton isn’t sure what to say. He’d known for a long time now that Virgil struggled with anxiety. That Virgil had anxiety attacks doesn’t exactly surprise him, and it definitely isn’t off-putting or anything of the sort. But Patton hates the way Virgil keeps trying to deflect… something. Judgement. Concern. Patton suddenly and fiercely wishes Virgil would just let someone care about him. Let someone love him.

Patton thinks maybe he already does.

“Virgil….” Patton says softly, looking at his hands folded between his knees, “It’s okay. You know that, right? You can talk to me about it. And I’m not gonna judge you or think you’re weird or that there’s anything wrong with you.”

“I… I’m fine.”

Patton lifts a shoulder. “Okay. But… it’s okay if you aren’t, too. And either way… you’re definitely not alone. You know? You know Roman’s there for you, but… but I am too. I care about you.”

In his peripheral, he sees Virgil look at him. “Patton—”

“There you guys are!” Roman exclaims as he jogs up to the two of them. Patton smiles at Virgil—who looks, for all the world, like the ground has shifted underneath him.

Patton wants to ask him why. He never does.

…

Present.

SANDERS has played through five songs, which means they’re nearing the end of their set. Patton is beaming. Virgil and Roman play off each other so well, and their music seems to be a blend of both of them in a way. They balance each other on stage. They’re fun to watch. Patton can’t help but think, though he may be biased, that if they really wanted to… they could make a career out of it.

But then they do something that surprises Patton, and apparently everyone else too from the way the crowd starts to murmur.

Virgil trades out his electric guitar for his light brown acoustic one. Roman grabs a wooden stool from one of the wings and sets it in the middle of the stage. Virgil adjusts the strap of the guitar around his shoulders, nodding his thanks to Roman.

“So I hope you all don’t mind if we close out with something a little different than our usual pace,” Virgil is saying into the wireless mic attached to him. “But I lost a bet against Roman, and that means I gotta do this.”

“If I lost I was gonna have to wear jorts for this concert. You all should be thanking me,” Roman quips back through his own mic. There’s a chuckle from Virgil as well as the crowd.

“Yeah, well. This is a song I wrote over the course of… probably about a year. It’s about someone very… important to me. He couldn’t be here tonight, but… he’s pretty great. Anyway, it’s a little different, so uh.” Even under the stage lights, Patton thinks he can see Virgil flushing slightly. “I hope you all like it.”

Virgil starts strumming and all Patton can do is watch him, transfixed by the sound of an acoustic guitar and the sight of Virgil under a spotlight on stage. It’s a much softer song already than any other song in their entire set. Virgil ducks his head slightly, his black sneaker tapping out the ¾ meter. And then Virgil starts to sing.

“When I was younger I saw my daddy cry, and curse at the wind.

He broke his own heart and I watched as he tried to reassemble it.

And my momma swore that she would never let herself forget.

And that was the day that I promised I’d never sing of love if it does not exist.

But darlin’ you are the only exception. You are the only exception…”

As Virgil sings, Patton can’t help but feel rooted to the spot. Virgil sitting and playing his acoustic guitar reminds Patton suddenly of that moment again back in Virgil’s dorm room. That moment of honesty and openness from him that always felt so rare. Patton feels like he’s experiencing that again, despite the crowd and the spotlights. Because this is not performance-Virgil, this is just…. Virgil. At his most honest. At his mot exposed. And it’s breathtaking.

Patton doesn’t even fully realize that he’s moving closer to the stage until he almost trips over a girl that’s swaying and holding her phone with a flashlight up in the air.

Virgil breaks into the second verse, and Patton feels his stomach fluttering all over again at the sound of his voice.

“Well maybe I know somewhere deep in my soul that love never lasts.

And we’ve got to find other ways to make it alone or keep a straight face.

And I’ve always lived like this. Keeping a comfortable distance.

And up until now I had sworn to myself that I’m content with loneliness,

‘Cuz none of it was ever worth the risk.

Well you are the only exception. You are the only exception…”

And a part of Patton—a part he’s afraid to admit to—suddenly starts to grow insistent with the realization that he might be really, truly, unequivocally in love with the person singing on the stage in this moment. The one with his bangs falling into eyes that had always looked to Patton to be a little bit afraid and a lot brave.

This song, this moment, is no exception to that. Music, for Virgil, had always started from some place deeply personal. It is what allows him to connect to others, after all. And Patton doesn’t know if the song is about him, but he wants it to be. Because that deeply personal space that Virgil is singing from resonates with Patton in a way that leaves only one thought repeating in his head. I love you, I love you, I love you.

Almost as if he hears the thought itself, Virgil looks up and starts scanning the crowd again as he reaches the bridge.

“I’ve got a tight grip on reality

But I can’t let go of what’s in front of me here.” He’s scanning, scanning, scanning…

“I know you’re leaving in the morning. When you wake up,

Leave me with some kind of proof it’s not a dream. Oh…”

And then his eyes settle squarely on Patton, and Patton swears he hears the very faint catch of Virgil’s breath through the mic.

Patton gives him a small, faint smile. There’s a brief moment where uncertainty flickers through Virgil’s dark eyes, and then something sets firmly in them. As if he’s made some kind of split-second decision. Virgil stands up from the stool and starts making his way towards the stage stairs, continuing to play and sing as he does so.

“You are the only exception. You are the only exception….”

Patton loses sight of him as he steps down to ground level, the crowd blocking his view. But Virgil keeps singing that line over and over, you are the only exception, as if imploring Patton to hear it and understand it and know it is meant for him. As if perhaps Virgil has to repeat it himself to fully believe in its truth, but each time he sings it, Patton can hear the conviction growing. Far ahead of him, Patton can see people shifting around in the mosh pit in front of him.

Patton doesn’t move. He doesn’t think he knows how to.

And then through the crowd of people in front of him steps Virgil, still playing. Still singing. And Patton can’t help but notice his eyes look wide and scared and vulnerable—but unwavering—as he sings the final line.

“But I’m on my way to believing…”

He plays the final chord and stands there, looking up at Patton. He’s so close. The guitar and a few inches is all that separates them. Patton swallows past the lump in his throat and brings a hand up to cup Virgil’s jaw before leaning his forehead against Virgil’s and whispering.

“Can I kiss you?”

His eyes are closed, so he doesn’t see Virgil’s relieved, crooked grin. But he feels it when Virgil presses his lips to his own.

#sanders sides #sanders sides fanfiction #romantic moxiety #moxiety #romantic moxiety fanfiction #fluff #crowds #cursing #kissing #softness #sappiness #virgil sanders #patton sanders

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something-tofightfor · 5 years ago

Text

Tonight: Part 6

Pairing: Logan Delos x Reader (first person POV)

Word Count: 7160

Rating: R (language, mentions of violence, sex, drug use)

Trigger Warnings: Restraint, mention of drug use and casual sex

Summary: After the night (and morning) with Logan, what’s next for the two of you? Was it one night - or could it mean more?

Author’s Note: I apologize so much for taking three months to finish this one, but as many of you know, Logan’s... very important to me. I wanted this to be right, and I didn’t want to end it on a low note. I wanted to make sure that I was completely happy with this final part of the story, because Logan deserves the best.

Thank you for going along on this journey with me. Thank you for supporting me and supporting Logan. Thank you for all of your comments and asks and compliments.

Tag list: @benbarnestongue @its-my-little-dumpster-fire @the-blind-assassin-12 @disengagefrmreality @suchatinyinfinity @elanor-of-imladris @lexxierave @ms-delos @blah-blah-fuckit-shit @drinix @gollyderek @ymariejp @traeumerinwitzhelden @obscurilicious @thesumofmychoices @breanime @madamrogersstorytelling @songtoyou @ethereal-heavcns @editboutique @marauderskeeper @ilkaeliseb @delicatelilyflower @king4thesirens @mr-robot-x @rageshots @shinebrightlikeafanbase @littlemermaidprobz @introvertedlibrary @writing-for-a-chance @yesixoxo @ilikebeachessushiandsmallanimals @likeorions @swiftyhowlz @dylanobrusso @luminex3 @malik-payne @lynne1993 @bucky-is-my-precious @mfackenthal @weallhaveadestiny @ladyblablabla @sweetybuzz25 @dreamwritesimagines @audreychaz @tc-elliot @dreams-with-thoughts @kind-wolf @honeyydippaa @thesandbeneathmytoes @geeksareunique

We slept the majority of the day, and when I finally opened my eyes, the light in the room had changed again. Logan was still sleeping next to me, hair messy and spread out over the pillow, but he was no longer touching me. He’d shifted away slightly, on his side from the waist down, the blanket pushed down to his knees, but the top half of his body was flat against the bed, chest pressed to the comforter. He’d shoved his hand and forearm beneath the pillow to support his head, the other arm trapped beneath his body. Oh, Logan. I’d never watched him sleep before, but figured that he wouldn’t mind, and so I stared at him, fighting the urge to reach out and run my fingers through his hair. He asked you to stay. He didn’t give you permission to touch him.

Eyes moving over his pale skin - still with a few red marks present on his back from my greedy fingers hours prior - I thought carefully. I cared about Logan, and he knew it. Even if I didn’t say it in so many words, the trust I had in him - the belief in his ability to control himself, even when I’d seen and felt him at less than his best - was apparent. I knew that he’d been with many women and men before me, and likely would be with even more after me, but I desperately wanted to believe that no one had shown Logan what I had - no one had ever willingly put their life in his hands in the way that I chose to. I want to help you, Logan. But I also want you… and want you to help yourself.

Keeping things casual had been an option at first, but I’d been a fool to think that I wouldn’t fall for the man the longer things continued between us and the more I got to know him. Sober or not, Logan and I had been toeing the line for months, and we’d finally crossed it for good with my request the previous night. What that meant exactly for us, though, remained to be seen. I shifted on the mattress, realizing that I had to pee, and with a wince, I rolled away from Logan, carefully getting out of the bed so that I didn’t disturb him. Shutting the door quietly behind me, I gripped the edge of the counter for a moment, steadying myself before I sat down, my mind racing. Do I get back into bed? Do I sneak out? What do I do?

Before washing my hands, I used one of Logan’s towels to clean myself up, dampening it with warm water and running it over my lower half and between my breasts. What I really need is a shower. That done, I stared at myself in the mirror, fighting back the same terror that I’d felt before going back to sleep. What happens now? My hair was a mess of tangles, lips still somewhat swollen, and there was a faint bruise on my shoulder to go with the ones on my neck. Hmm. Taking a breath, I twisted my hair into a knot at the top of my head, securing it with the same elastic that I’d removed earlier before quietly opening the door and stepping back into the room. “Hey.” Freezing at the sound of his voice, my eyes went back to the bed, where Logan was still in the same position as before, except now, his eyes were open. Shit. “Gonna get back in bed?”

I nodded and climbed back in next to him without speaking, and as soon as the sheet had been pulled up to my chest, Logan moved, pulling the hand from beneath the pillows and reaching over to squeeze my bicep. “Yeah, Logan?” He looked peaceful, still half asleep, and I couldn’t help staring at him, my gaze focused on his face. “Sleep well?” He nodded, his hand sliding up my arm to my shoulder, thumb circling over it. Don’t get used to this.

“Can I…” He swallowed, closing his eyes and reopening them before he spoke. “Can I take you out to dinner tonight?” What? He must have seen the look in my eyes because he continued quickly, not giving me a chance to speak. “I’d offer to cook for you, but there’s nothin’ here for real food.” Logan cleared his throat. “I don’t want you to go, not until…” He paused, thinking. “Not until I understand.” Understand what?

“I don’t have anything to wear, Logan. Just the jeans I was in last night, and-”

“You left a dress here once.” I did? “I washed it, and then kept it in the closet. I didn’t realize it was yours at first, but then I saw a picture of you in it, and I knew.” He waited a second. “You can shower and then put it on, and we can go, if you want.” Oh.

“I… Logan…” God, I want to. I rubbed a hand over my face, groaning. “You don’t owe me anything, Logan.” Looking back at him, I expected to see relief in his eyes, but instead I saw something else entirely. “Logan, what’s wrong?”

“If you want to leave, leave.” He rolled away from me, hands dropping immediately to pull the blanket up over himself. “Just fucking go, if you want to get out of here so much.” What? He sat up, facing away from me and leaned forward, head in his hands. I only caught a few words - too good, known better, doesn’t matter - before he shoved off of the mattress, crouching down to pull his pants back on. “Go.” No, that’s not… that isn’t what I wanted at all. “Get out of my bed.” You’re naked. Remember that.

“Logan.” I said his name, sitting up and holding the sheet to my chest. “Logan, look at me.” He’d started striding toward the bathroom, but my words stopped him at the foot of the bed, his head turning toward me. “I don’t want to leave.” He faced me fully, leaning forward to grip the footboard of his bed. “That’s not what I was…” Rising onto my knees and moving to the end of the bed while keeping the sheet pressed to my chest, I reached out to Logan with one hand, closing my fingers around his wrist. “I wasn’t making excuses, Logan. But you don’t owe me anything.” I took a breath, focusing my gaze on his bare chest. “I don’t expect anything between us to change because of… earlier.” Look at him. Look at him when you speak to him. “You’ve got a lot of shit to work through, Logan. I know that. I’m just…” I tried to find words, but all I wanted to do was tell him that I wanted to be there for him while he sorted through everything, while he made changes. You can’t do that.

“What are you saying?” Logan leaned in further, his face only a few inches from mine. “That’s all I get? That one time where someone treated me like I’m not a fuckin’ failure?” He curled his upper lip, scoffing. “One time to show me that maybe I can get past this bullshit with someone that I... and that’s it?” I sucked in a breath, grip on his wrist tightening. “I don’t owe you anything, you’re right.” Logan’s eyes closed for a second, brow furrowing. “But I need to know.” Need to know what? “Take a shower. I’ll get that dress. We’ll have dinner, and then we can talk, alright?” More talking?

“Yeah, Logan.” I nodded, and was surprised to feel Logan’s forehead resting against mine, hair soft against my skin. “That sounds good.”

---

The two of us were showered and ready to go within the hour, my hair secured in a loose braid that hung over one shoulder and hid the side of my neck, my skin makeup free. As I sat in the passenger seat of Logan’s car, I was silent, staring out the window. He didn’t try to speak to me, but a few minutes into the drive, Logan reached over, fingers tentatively linking with mine. “This alright?” His voice was quiet, and I jerked my head toward him, watching as his eyes flicked from the road to our hands and then back.

“Yeah, Logan.” More than alright. I squeezed his hand and returned to staring out the window.

“Italian alright?” He’s repeating himself. I told him that it was, and after only a few more minutes, Logan pulled into a parking lot that I was familiar with. “Wanna eat here? We can go somewhere else, I just -”

“No, Logan. This is great.” But instead of getting out of the car, Logan turned the engine off, pulling his hand from mine and using it - and the other one - to grip the steering wheel tightly. “Logan, are you… is everything ok?” He’s not.

“I’m… I’ve been better.” He looked over at me, and I again saw how pale his skin was. “But we’re not going to talk about that right now, we’re going to go and have dinner.” He let go of the steering wheel, using one hand to run his fingers through his hair. “Least I can do is feed you properly, right?” Smiling, I nodded at him, unable to stop myself from leaning in and kissing his cheek, my lips catching the corner of his mouth. I shouldn’t have done that. But when I went to pull away, I felt Logan’s hand at my cheek, stopping my movement. “Nope.” He turned his head toward me, staying close. “You’re gonna kiss me, kiss me.”

And I did, wasting no time meeting his lips with mine, one hand moving through his hair as I angled my body toward him. I’m making out with Logan sober in the front seat of his car, this cannot be real life. He kissed me like he had that morning after we’d gotten back into bed and I was reluctant to pull back, but when Logan’s stomach growled, I sighed into his mouth, dropping my hand to his shoulder and pushing him playfully. “C’mon, Logan. Let’s eat.”

Throughout the meal, we made small talk, avoiding all potential conversation about the previous night - and earlier this morning. Logan”s focus was on me the whole meal, but he was off, tone a little too cheery, eyes a little too bright. He’s embarrassed. It’s… shit. I waved the waiter off when he offered dessert, even though the Red Velvet cake at the restaurant was my favorite and I always joked with my friends that I’d have it at my wedding, wanting only to get Logan back into a place where it was just the two of us. He paid the bill, handing over his card and signing the receipt without even looking at the total, and then stood, waiting. “Wanna get out of here?” How many times have you used that line, Logan? But I nodded, standing, and we started walking back toward the doors, space left between us.

More than one woman in the restaurant turned her head to follow Logan’s path past her, eyebrows raised as they stared him down, lips pushed out in a pout, cleavage on display - but he didn’t even look twice at them. Reaching the car, Logan paused before unlocking it, one hand again moving almost nervously through his hair. “Logan, I… what do you need? Tell me.” I frowned at him, stepping closer and reaching out for his arm, pausing before I actually touched him. “Logan…”

“Is this a date?” He swallowed, eyes on my face. “I know that seems like bullshit to ask it after… but… fuck.” He lowered his gaze, sighing. “I’m not good at this, usually it’s just leavin’ early and not lookin’ back, but…”

“Do you want it to be, Logan?” My heart racing, I waited. What does… could he? He said my name, and I snapped back to attention, finally laying my fingers against his arm.

“I think I do.” Nodding, Logan’s other arm moved, hand stopping on my hip. “I want…” But he stopped speaking, looking over my shoulder and across the parking lot, nose wrinkled. “Let’s go back to my place, and we can talk about it.” I nodded, wordlessly, expecting him to drop his hand, but Logan didn’t, instead stepping forward and sliding it around to my lower back, pulling me against him and wrapping his other arm around my shoulders in a hug. Oh. I hugged him back, closing my eyes and inhaling. I like this, but I need to be careful.

We were both silent in the car almost the entire way home, Logan’s eyes on the road and mine focused on the side window, though our hands were again joined between us. What am I gonna say to him? I knew what I wanted to say - that I’d be there for him whenever and however he needed me, even if it meant that nothing like the previous night happened again, that I just wanted to help. I wanted him to know that he wasn’t alone, that he didn’t have to pretend he was - that I cared about him. But is that the right call? He parked the car in front of his garage, right next to mine, but before he could get out, I made my decision as I touched his knee. “Let’s walk, Logan. The beach is good. We can sit on the sand.” He seemed surprised, but I nodded twice, opening the door and stepping out of the car quickly.

The skirt of my dress fluttered in the wind as we walked down the path between houses and toward the beach, but Logan didn’t try to take my hand, instead walking a step or two behind me the entire way. When we reached the bottom, I took my shoes off, setting them on the final step and looking back at him, smiling. “Take ‘em off, Delos.” He smiled too - a small one - and slid his feet out of the shoes before taking his socks off, too. Though he was dressed casually - a pair of jeans and a short sleeved shirt, Logan’s posture was rigid as we walked across the sand and toward the water, unlike I’d ever seen him before. In the months I’d known him, Logan always carried himself with grace and ease, even when he was out of it. There was something comforting about the way Logan moved - confidence in every step, with every syllable, but that was nothing like the Logan that was beside me. Glancing over my shoulder and making sure that we were still within sight of his house, I reached toward the sky, stretching as I planted my feet. “Here’s good, Logan.”

He stopped walking, waiting until I’d settled on the sand, dress tucked around my legs as I crossed them beneath me to sit, again leaving space between us. I hate this. We silently watched the waves crash against the shore, daylight beginning to fade, and I sighed deeply, eyes on the water though all I wanted to do was turn my head and look at Logan. Did I ruin everything? He’d never been distant with me, not like this, and I didn’t know what to think. Sure, in the moment, and even after, things had seemed good between us, but maybe I’d been wrong. Logan, what did I do? Tell me how to fix this. “No matter who I’ve been with in the past, human or Host, they didn’t… treat me like I mattered much.” Logan finally spoke, voice strong even though it was quiet. “Yeah, I got what I wanted and so did they, but it’s never been real, you know?” I turned my head, watching as Logan pressed his lips together, eyes out and on the horizon. “Westworld and the other parks are the same thing, over and over. Drinking and fucking and killing and…” He shrugged. “It is what it is - an outlet, a fuckin’ escape, somewhere I don’t have to think because it’s all bullshit.” Logan closed his eyes. “I treat the Hosts there like people here treat me, use ‘em and leave ‘em and don’t even think twice about it.” He fell silent again, finally looking over at me. “And so I started treatin’ people like that, too. I didn’t want to hurt them physically or anything, but I didn’t care… what I did to them or how they felt when I was done with ‘em because it’s easy.”

“Logan, I -” He smiled, the expression sad.

“No, please. Let me get this out.” I nodded, swallowing. “I’ve got a pretty high tolerance, so I’m… aware when I’m with people out here, but haven’t had to make a conscious decision about the way I treat someone in years.” Logan swallowed too, looking down at his lap and then back at me. “I had to do that with you last night. I had to be sure that I didn’t hurt you worse than I did before.” Logan’s eyes went to my neck again, pain registering in them for a split second. “Because I cared. Because I didn’t want to go too far, because I … I want to be able to …” Logan shook his head back and forth violently, biting down on his lower lip and wrinkling his nose. “People move in and out of my life when it’s convenient for them, and when it’s convenient for me. That’s a part of this, a part of bein’ a Delos, part of being me.” He finally looked back at me, eyes wide. “And I’ve been ok with that, because it’s what I … it’s what I deserve for the things I’ve done and the way I’ve acted.” Oh, Logan. No. “My dad thinks I’m a failure, the board members… half of LA thinks that I’m a piece of shit and the other half knows it because I’ve fucked ‘em over.”

“But, Logan -”

“I don’t wanna fuck you over.” He spoke quietly, eyes locked on mine. “I don’t care what else I do, I don’t ever wanna fuck you over.” He reached out, moving the end of my braid back over my shoulder and dropped his gaze. “I don’t know if this can work. I don’t know what this working would even look like.” Logan narrowed his eyes before closing them. “One night means nothing. One night is a fluke.” I… yeah. “But it’s proof that I can still control myself.” He moved his hands in his lap, clearing his throat. “When you turned me down this morning, I thought it was because you… got what you wanted, and weren’t interested in sticking around for the normal things.” Oh, Logan. “Do you know what it felt like to wake up with a clear head and feel you next to me?” Scary? “It felt like hope.”

“Logan, you need to... “ I shifted closer to him, reaching out to touch his hands. “I don’t want to leave, Logan. I told you yesterday that I want to help you.” He watched me carefully, waiting for me to speak again. “It’s not healthy for us to feel… for you to feel scared when you touch me, or when we’re…” I sighed, shaking my head. “This has been years for you, Logan. It’s not going to change in a day.” Logan laughed, nodding as he looked back out over the water. “It won’t be easy, Logan. I’m not a qualified… I don’t know exactly how to help you with this, I can’t give you all of the answers.” He was still nodding, the expression on his face stoic again. “You called me a friend, right?” Logan nodded, agreeing. “Then let me be your friend.” I exhaled, adjusting my position so that I was kneeling on the sand, facing him. “Let me be here for you, Logan.” Even if it’s only as a friend. Would it kill me to watch him with other people? Yes. Would I do it if I knew it would make him better? Without question. “I’m not a professional, Logan. But I care about you, and I think that means more.” He finally looked at me again, unblinking. “I care about what happens to you, Logan.” He kept staring at me, but finally nodded, hands reaching out toward me.

Moving again, I let Logan pull me to him, adjusting myself in the sand so that I knelt over Logan’s legs, which were stretched out in front of him, knees slightly bent. “Do you?” I nodded too, using one hand to touch his face, not breaking eye contact. “Do you mean it?” Oh, Logan. My heart broke for him - for the man sitting in front of me on the sand, skin pale and eyes empty. “They don’t. None of them do, no matter how many times they tell me, and I can’t believe…”

“I do care about you, Logan.” Leaning in to press my forehead against his, I closed my eyes, steadying myself. “What do I have to do to make you believe that?” He gripped my hips, pushing downward so that I settled against his thighs, but still didn’t let go. “I wouldn’t lie to you.” Without pulling away from him, I shook my head. “I can’t lie to you.”

“Tell me.” He sighed and I felt a dampness on my fingers, feeling him shudder beneath my touch. “Tell me you’ll help me, that you won’t… that you won’t leave if it gets hard or that you won’t give up on me.” Without pause, I straightened up, using my hand to lift his face so that he was looking at me again. Silent tears were leaking down Logan’s face and I could feel myself crumbling in front of him, at the fact that Logan was showing such vulnerability. “Tell me last night and this morning weren’t just another reminder of something in my life that’s not real, that can’t ever be real.” He took a deep breath. “Tell me that this was a date, that you want… this isn’t just another… fuck.” Logan looked away, his eyes on the setting sun. “This is stupid, so stupid.”

“It’s not, Logan.” Moving my hands, I cradled his face between them, forcing him to look back at me. “I don’t think any less of you because you’re asking for help.” Shaking my head back and forth, I continued, wanting him to feel the truth in my words. “You’re strong. You’re honest. You’re a good man, Logan Delos.” I nodded my head at the shake of his, holding eye contact. “Yes. You are. And anyone that’s ever told you otherwise, Logan, can fuck right off. They don’t know you. William doesn’t know you. Your… Jim doesn’t know you. Those men and women? They mean nothing, Logan.”

“But -” I sighed, closing my eyes,

“No ‘buts’, Logan. You’re not perfect - far from it.” He cracked a weak smile at that and I continued, watching as the wind whipped Logan’s hair around his face. “And yeah, you’ve got some issues to work through, you know that… but I care about you, Logan. I wouldn’t be here if I didn’t, I wouldn’t have… risked…” I trailed off, not wanting to go too deep into his actions from the night before, but knowing that I needed to. “You’re not like this because you want to be, Logan. This isn’t fun for you, and I don’t think it’s ever really been.”

“I wouldn’t say that.” Logan swallowed, looking down. “Some of it is. I like the money and the status, like being able to do what I want when I want.” He turned his head, lips meeting the heel of my hand. “But it’s not worth it when I see the look in your eyes that I saw last night, when I... “ He swore again, huffing under his breath. “You were afraid of me, even if only for a few seconds, and it’s never mattered before, with... but if I’d…” He finally looked up and back at me, resolve in his eyes. “I can’t risk hurting you - hurting anyone.” Anyone. I felt the crushing disappointment in my chest at that - at the thought there’d be someone else with him the way that I’d been the night before and fought to hide it, staring at him. “I can’t do that anymore.”

“What are you saying, Logan?” Leaning in, I waited, both hands still on his face.

“I need to… I need to see someone.” Logan closed his eyes as if the admission embarrassed him. “No rehab, not right away, but I need to talk to someone, need to…” Yes. Talk to someone, let them help you figure this out. “I need to figure out how to be with you without needing to be handcuffed to a bed.” He paused and my eyebrows shot up in surprise. What? “You.” He nodded, still looking vulnerable, and then continued. “You’ve always been there for me, ever since we met, and when you weren’t anymore, something changed with how I... I’m different when I’m with you. I don’t… I’m tryin’ to impress you, yeah, but it’s different.” Logan leaned forward, forehead against mine. “I’m doing it because I want to, not because I feel like I have to.”

“Logan, what are you…” My heart was pounding, and I was almost certain that he could hear it over the sound of the surf. “Be with me? You’ve never…”

“Shit,” Logan said, licking his lips. “Before yesterday, I thought that this was just… I thought you stopped talkin’ to me because you were sick of my shit, because you realized you don’t want…”

“I told you, Logan.” I pulled back from him, putting space between us even though all I wanted to do was lean in. “I won’t be the person you call at 2 am anymore, won’t be the girl that gets drunk with you and falls into your bed only to leave before you wake up the next day and have to pretend like I don’t care.” I dropped my hands to his shoulders. “I am sick of that, Logan. No reason to lie about it. But it’s not because I’m sick of you, it’s because…” This is it. All of this - the last twenty four hours… hell, the last eight months. “It’s because I want more than that, Logan. With you. I want us to have a shot at this, I have for a while, but I’ve never been… it’s not my place to ask that. You’re, well, you. You do things a certain way and you don’t settle and it’s just sex and you -”

“It’s not settling, not with you.” Logan leaned in again, kissing me on the lips briefly. “How could it be?” There’s no way. “Shit’s gotta change, and I know that, but I’m telling you that I want you to be here with me when it does.” Logan kissed me again, even more gently than he had previously. “I don’t wanna just be your friend.” I inhaled at the declaration, eyes widening. “I want last night and this morning all the time.” You do? “But I want to earn the right to ask you for that.” He paused, sitting up straight and moving his hands from my hips to my thighs, shoulders straight. “I gotta earn your respect and your trust. I have to earn those dates, that … time with you..”

“Logan.” Unconsciously, my hands slid back to his neck, thumbs stroking his jaw and the tips of my fingers resting against the hair at the nape of his neck. “Yes.” There was no reason to overcomplicate things. Both of us had said a great deal already - spilled secrets, admitted our fears, opened up to each other. Why keep going? It’s simple. “I want that, too.” He seemed shocked, his eyes brightening and lips parting in surprise. “With you, Logan.” He wasted no time, leaning in and kissing me again, grip tightening on my legs. His tongue slipped back into my mouth, and as we kissed, I moved a hand up and into his hair, stroking the back of his head. This is what I want. You.

“I can do this,” he whispered after breaking the kiss, nodding slowly. “I want to do this.”

“Yeah, Logan. I know you can.”

---

Six months later

I stood in front of the door, hand raised to knock and a frown on my face. I hadn’t seen Logan in a week and a half; he’d been on a business trip to Westworld with potential Delos clients, but he’d texted me to let me know he was home - and that he wanted to see me. It was the first time since our night together that he’d been back to the park, and I knew that he’d been nervous about it. Alright, Logan, let’s do this. I knocked on the door, waiting as I put my hands into the pockets of my hoodie, head down. The door opened a few seconds later, and I glanced up, not knowing what I expected to see. “Logan?”

The man in front of me looked perfectly put together - cheeks full, hair and beard neatly trimmed, clothes casual. “Hey.” He grinned at me, reaching out with one hand for mine and I took it, still surprised. “What?” I…

“You look good, Logan.” We stepped into his kitchen, Logan stopping as we reached the edge of the counter. “How was -” I was cut off with a kiss, his hand squeezing mine tightly as he moved his other one to my hip, pulling me into him. Though surprised, I kissed him back, smiling against his lips before pulling away and taking a deep breath. “What was that for?”

“I missed you.” He shrugged, running his hand through his hair. “We haven’t gone that long without seein’ each other in months.” It was true, since the night I’d spent at his place where we’d hashed everything out, Logan and I had been in constant contact, seeing each other almost daily. He’d sought out a therapist, staring with sessions twice a week, upping it to three times a week for a two month period when things got bad for him, and then dropping back down to two - and then finally to one visit a week just before he’d left for Westworld. I could see and feel the difference in him once he’d started to get comfortable in his sessions, and Logan and I had definitely made personal progress, too. “Did you miss me?” The question coming from anyone else would have seemed redundant or excessive, but from Logan, it was serious, an honest fear of his that I was still questioning what he meant to me.

“Of course I did, Logan. This wasn’t just a regular business trip, I haven’t spoken to you in - “ He surged forward, kissing me again, and this time when we pulled apart, we were both breathing hard and my chest was red above the zipper of my hoodie. “Jesus, Logan.”

“I didn’t… hurt any of them this time.” He spoke quietly and I could hear the apprehension in his voice. “I… I mean, I shot a few Hosts, but it was part of a narrative. I didn’t… when I had the chance, I didn’t... “Didn’t what? Didn’t fuck them? Didn’t kill them, didn’t want to? He licked his lips. “The anger’s not there anymore.” Oh, Logan, that’s… “Jim really fucked me before I left, too. This trip was supposed to be a disaster for me, he gave me all the wrong information, but I wasn’t… I didn’t... “ He grinned. “I made the deal. They’re going to invest, and they fucking love the park.”

I smiled too, hand squeezing his arm. “That’s a huge deal you made, right?” He nodded. “I’m proud of you, Logan. That’s incredible.” He gestured toward the refrigerator, asking if I wanted a drink. “Yeah, Logan. A beer’d be great.” He moved over, grabbing two of them and then we walked through the kitchen and down the hall, returning to the deck with the swing that we’d sat on the first night. This time, when we sat, there was no space between us, my head resting on his shoulder and his arm tightly around me. We sat in silence for a while, swinging back and forth gently, but finally my curiosity got the better of me. “So… who was the lucky Host this time? Clementine? Angela? Hector?” Logan laughed, and I felt his lips meet the top of my head before he spoke again.

“Nope.” Logan cleared his throat. “I went for it, picked the one that I figured I’d have the most negative reaction to.” What? I sat up straight, shocked. “Yeah, that’s how I figured you’d react. I picked Dolores.” I’d attended therapy with Logan a few times at his request, and during one of the sessions, he’d told me about the trip to the park with William in detail - Dolores and the Confederados and Pariah, picking at William until the man finally broke, showing his true colors and almost killing Logan. I understood the aversion to rope, the unwillingness to have his hands tied together, why he didn’t like being out in the sun for long periods of time, the disdain for William and his advances within Delos after that day… and it was a turning point for him - and for us. But for him to challenge himself the first visit into the park by choosing to take to bed a Host that he’d killed and hurt over and over in various ways? I couldn’t believe it. “I never even wanted to hurt her when I was with her, and it was multiple times. Yeah, I was annoyed and I still feel the anger about William and what she… meant to him, but hurting her won’t do anything for me, and I get that now.”

We’d had long discussions about what going to Westworld would mean for Logan after we’d decided to be together, and he’d been surprised when I’d been open to the thought of him being with Hosts in the park. “They’re not real, Logan. It’s no different than using a vibrator or…” I shrugged. “That’s part of you. The park is the park, it’s not like they’re coming home with you, or you want to be with them.” I bumped his shoulder with mine, smirking. “And if I ever make it out to Westworld, Logan? Maybe I’ll get to see what it’s like to be with a Host, too.” Thinking about him with someone else, someone real was painful, but the Hosts? Glorified sex robots? I didn’t care - and I knew that at the very least, he’d need to try in order to see if the therapy was working, to see if things had changed for him on that end, although he still didn’t trust himself to be with me sober and unrestrained, even months later. “How’d it feel, Logan?”

“It felt…” He sipped his beer, leaning back against the backrest of the swing, glancing down at me. “It felt like it used to, when I first started going there. It was a release for me, a way to blow off steam, a way for me to unwind.” He shook his head. “She fuckin’ sucks, don’t get me wrong, but for the first time in a few years, I could … I felt the difference between what I was thinkin’ and what I was feeling. It was fun again” He squeezed my shoulder, shifting so that he was angled toward me and took my hand in his. “It’s helping. All the therapy and the talking to you, and cuttin’ off the people…” Logan pressed his lips together, using his free hand to rub at his eyes. “It’s been hard, but it’s working, and it’s… worth it.”

He hadn’t said those words in the previous months, instead lashing out occasionally, yelling about how he needed a fix, about how he just wanted to go back to his old life. I’d stood firm, telling him that if that’s what he really wanted, I couldn’t - and wouldn’t - stop him. He’d walked out once, leaving me standing in his kitchen with tears in my eyes, the sound of the door slamming echoing in my ears, but he’d reentered the room only a few minutes later, apologizing in broken sentences, begging me to forgive him. Another time,about two months in, he’d called me on the phone after a rough day at work, telling me that it wasn’t working, that all he could think about was sticking a needle in his arm, that nothing was worth not having that feeling, the ability to forget, that he’d already called one of his contacts, that they were waiting for him at one of his favorite clubs. I hadn’t known how to reply, so I asked him if that’s what he really wanted, waiting for his answer with my car keys in hand, giving him the chance to make his choice.

And he had after a while, after remaining silent on the other end of the phone, breathing heavily. My heartbeat echoing in my ears, I’d waited for Logan to respond, hoping that he’d make the right choice, the one that would keep him safe and on the right path. “Will you come over? I don’t want to be alone.” I knew that I couldn’t singlehandedly save Logan, that it wasn’t my job, but it was my choice - it was my decision to be there for him, to help him when and how I could - so I’d gone, driving quickly to Logan’s and spending the night with him on his couch, arms wrapped around each other as he explained what had happened at work, what William had said to him, how the talk of removing him completely from his position had escalated.

Logan had doubled down after that day, increasing the therapy sessions, working harder to secure deals and clients for Delos, and the difference had been noticed - not only by me and the woman Logan saw in a cozy office in downtown Long Beach, but by Jim and William, too, the latter growing more and more worried by the day as Logan regained more of a foothold within Delos. “I’m happy for you, Logan. That’s great to hear.” He smiled again, teeth bright and white in the low light.

“Jim called me into his office when I got back and asked me to sit down, which isn’t normal.” Logan shrugged, teeth digging into his lower lip. “He uh, he… he promoted me, and congratulated me for it.” I gasped, my arms going around Logan and causing the swing to shake hard, the chains rattling in their hooks. “Yeah.” Logan hugged me tightly, lips finding the side of my neck. “Yeah, that was my reaction, too.” We stayed like that for a few moments and then Logan pulled away, raising a hand to my face. “Still got a long way to go to get William out of there, but this is a start.” I nodded, feeling his fingers stroking against my cheek. “Thank you.” He said it with such sincerity that it shocked me. “You being here has been exactly what I need.” I looked down, glancing back up at Logan through my lashes simply because I didn’t know what to say. This is on you, too. “Thank you for not giving up when you probably should have.”

“I’d never, Logan.” I wet my lips, moving my head back and forth. “Even after I cut you off, I couldn’t… you asked me to come here and I couldn’t tell you no.” He watched me, staying silent, and I saw the way his eyes moved over my face, the way he waited for me to continue instead of cutting in. “I hope you understand that me ever giving up on you isn’t possible.” Logan smiled at my words, lips twitching, and even though it was dark out, I knew that his skin was reddening, that he was embarrassed at my words. They’re true. Even now, after so many months of progress, Logan second guessed himself, what he said to me and to others, wanting to focus on making a good impression. “God, Logan.” I continued, leaning into his touch and smiling back at him. “I can’t tell you how happy I am for you, how proud I am of -”

“I love you.” His fingers kept moving against my cheek as he spoke, never faltering though his eyes were filled with terror. “You know that, right?” I… what? “I wanted to tell you before I left for the park, but I didn’t… I needed to make sure that…” His eyes flashed and then he closed them, taking a deep breath. “Now I know.” Know? “I’m… I’ve never said that to…”

“Logan?” I swallowed, shifting so that I was sitting up straight, wanting to be sure that he understood I was listening. “Say it again.” He blinked twice, hand dropping from my cheek to my neck in the same place it had been in on that first night.

“I love you.” I didn’t flinch as his grip tightened slightly, thumb rubbing along my jaw. “I’ve loved you s-”

“I love you too, Logan.” I’d thought the words in my head multiple times - over and over, both while in bed with him and out, hoping that the opportunity to say them would present itself someday. Here it is. “I’m in love with you, Logan Delos.” He smiled at that, nodding again as he lowered his face to mine, stopping just before he kissed me. “You’re -” I stopped, closing my eyes and letting out a breath. “Fuck, Logan, what are you waiting for?”

His quiet laugh stopped as his mouth met mine, our lips moving together fluidly. We’d kissed hundreds of times in the months we’d spent together, but this kiss felt different, somehow, as if there was nothing hidden between us anymore. Sure, he was still working through things, and of course it would take some getting used to to hear (and know) that Logan loved me, but if there was one thing I knew for certain, it was that he wouldn’t have said it if he didn’t mean it. With Logan, I could always count on the truth, no matter how much it hurt or caught me off guard. He loves me. He used his free hand to pull me onto his lap, wrapping it around my waist as I settled in place, our mouths still connected. “Hey.” He pulled away, taking a deep breath and pressing his forehead against mine. “Wanna go to bed?”

Without pause, I answered, tugging on his hair with one hand and nodding. “Yeah, Logan.” I tilted my head, kissing him again, unable to keep the smile off of my face and the excitement out of my voice. “And I don’t think we need the cuffs tonight.”

---

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walkerismychoice · 6 years ago

Text

I Can Love You Better

Book: ROD

Pairing: Logan X MC, Colt X MC

Rating: A bit NSFW/Mature/18+

Note: This story is all contained within Chapter 11 of ROD. Most of the dialogue comes directly from the book except for the parts I added in the beginning from Colt’s POV, a bit of Colt’s diamond scene in the car, and the end conversation with Riya. Speaking of the diamond scene, be warned that I added in some details that were left to the imagination and it gets a bit NSFW in this part. Also a shout-out to @bizzyschoices, as her YouTube video helped me immensely in transcribing the dialog.

Word Count: 3820

Tag List: @zaffrenotes @tmarie82 @boneandfur @lizeboredom @debramcg1106 @fluffy-marshmallow-heart @give-me-ernest-sinclaire @plutostudie-s @akrenich @rhymesmenagerie @confessionsofabrokegirl @alegria1580 @i-miss-trr @going-down-downtown @choicesarehard @choiceslife @teenytinymagician @a-whore-of-rome @frugalchoicer @mfackenthal

Colt watches stunned as Gabi storms out through the garage door. He didn't think before blurting out Logan's secret in front of the whole crew, but he was desperate to hang onto her and to not let his own secret out. He'd finally felt like she might actually like him as much as he'd come to like her, to want him more than she wanted Logan. No matter what she would think of Colt's plan for the brotherhood, it couldn't compare in his mind to how low Logan had stooped to get her to fall for him, so he had to risk it all and tell her. Colt should have told Gabi the second he found out, or found a better way than this, but what's done is done.

"Gabi, wait!" Colt calls out even though she probably can't hear him." He makes a move to run after her, but he's held back by a strong arm.

"Let her go, son." Teppei Kaneko nods in the direction of the door where Logan is already headed. "This is between Logan and Gabi right now."

"Fuck that!" Colt picks up a wrench among the tools scattered on the floor and chucks it at the nearest wall. A chunk of cement falls out as the wrench hits it and drops to the floor with a clatter.

"Enough!" Kaneko shouts. "Letting your temper get the best of you and getting too emotionally invested is what got you into this situation in the first place. You won't be helping yourself right now by running after her."

Colt glowers at his father. This whole situation is really his father’s fault, but Teppei is right. Colt will just look like even more of an asshole if he tries to interrupt them now. He huffs and stomps over to the couch, sinking down with his head in his hands. He doesn't want to hear what anyone has to say right now.

~~~~~

Logan races out of the shop to catch up to Gabi already halfway down the block. "Gabi, Wait! Let me explain-"

"And why should I believe a word of your 'explanation'? You've done nothing but lie to me since day one," Gabi hisses, the typical warmth and sparkle in her eyes replaced by an icy glare.

"I didn't know you back then. I didn't care about you. You were just a random stranger, someone the crew could use." As the words come out, Logan realizes he's not making it sound any better.

"I was nobody to you," her voice softens and the sadness and disappointment evident on her face are almost worse than her stone cold anger.

"You were. But once I actually got to know you..." Fuck he's bad at this. "At some point it all stopped being pretend."

"I wish I could believe you..." Gabi trails off.

Logan runs a hand through his hair. "Let me be honest for once. Whether you believe me of not...whether you forgive me or not...please let me explain." She crosses her arms and waits, so Logan continues. "Okay, let's go somewhere more private."

Gabi's eyes narrow. "I'm not going anywhere with you, Logan. You're telling me right here."

Logan sighs. "...Alright, what do you want to know?"

"I said everything, that means everything."

Logan inhales deeply and proceeds to tell Gabi how Kaneko paid some people off and got information on Gabi's dad. How Kaneko came up with the plan to have Logan get to know Gabi's and get her on their side, but how it was Logan's idea to call the cops on the house party to gain her trust faster by helping her escape.

Gabi's face falls again after taking in his words. "Did you feel anything that night?"

"Of course I did Gabi, how could I not have?" If only he could make her understand even though it was his job to win her over, all the feelings were real - are still real. It didn’t feel like a work to hang out with such a smart and pretty girl. He didn’t plan to kiss her that night, but he hadn’t been able to help himself.

She rolls her eyes. "Was it guilt?"

“No...not guilt. When I was with you I forgot about everything. About the crew, about your dad...I was just happy." Happier than he can ever remember in his life if he’s honest.

"I'm so stupid, how could this have turned out any different. You're a criminal!” Hearing this word from her lips cuts Logan deep, even though it is the truth. “I should have known someone like you could never care about someone like me. It was only ever about my father."

“That’s not true--”

“All those time you were asking me about my dad...You were pumping me for information?”

“I was asking for your help to stay out of prison--”

“You still can’t be honest with me, huh?” Gabi scoffs.

“Okay, yes, I was trying to keep us one step ahead of your dad. But the moment you told me your dad’s partner knew, I told you to go home. I was trying to protect you. I knew you shouldn’t be here.”

“You were right. I should have left. But you still should have come clean to me then, instead of just ignoring me or yelling at me.”

“I know. But I was afraid of--”

“Of what?” She snaps.

“Of this! Of what’s happening right now!” Logan takes a step closer, but she takes another step back. He wants to take her in his arms, to show her that however this started, it is now the most real thing he’s ever had, and as much as it killed him to try and make her leave that first time, he thought she’d listen and he’d spare her the pain and humiliation of finding everything out. He really had thought she wouldn’t come back, but when she did, he hadn’t known what to do. “This has been killing me forever. I kept trying to find a way to tell you.”

“This is what you wanted to get off your chest? Right before the stadium job?” He can see her wheels turning as she puts the pieces together.

“Yes, Gabi, please.” Logan pleads. “Yes things started out as a lie. But the crew? You’re one of us now. Even Kaneko believes it. They care about you. Toby, Ximena...hell, even Mona. I care about you and I’m...I’m sorry.”

“How do you expect me to believe that?”

“I can barely believe it myself. I can barely believe that some girl I just met takes over my every waking thought. I can’t believe that, every time I look at you, I feel like the luckiest bastard on the planet.” He hesitates, but he has to tell her because it might be the only chance he gets. “I can’t believe I love someone.”

He notices a flash of something in her that gives him hope, but then it’s gone all too soon. “Don’t say that, Logan. Please don’t say that now just to get me to change my mind--”

“I’m saying it now because I think this is the last time I’m ever gonna see you. And if I don’t say it, I’ll regret it the rest of my life. So, I’m not trying to stop you from leaving. I’m just asking you to believe me when I say I never wanted to hurt you.”

“It doesn’t matter if you didn’t want to hurt me, Logan. What matters is that you didn’t care.”

“You’re right, I didn’t.” He’d learned throughout his life to see other people as a means to an end. He’d found out way too young that loving and trusting only ever left him hurt and disappointed, and as much as Kaneko did for him, he only ever reinforced that. He told Logan not to get attached, and he could have left everyone else there in heartbeat, until he met Gabi. “But I do now.”

“Too little, too late. Anything else to say for yourself?” Logan stares at her for a long beat. He’s left it all out on the table, and she still doesn’t believe him, or he’s done too much damage for her to ever be able to trust him again. “Well?” She demands a response.

“I keep thinking there’s gotta be something I can say to take it all back, the right combination of words...But there’s not, is there?” She’s the only person he’s ever truly loved, and possibly loved him back, and he’s fucked it all up.

“No, there’s not.” And with that, Gabi turns and walks away.

Logan watches her go, hoping she’ll realize she’s not ready to let him go and come back. He sees her look back as she rounds the corner but she keeps on going. Logan wonders if she can see the tears forming in his eyes from that distance away and if it makes her feel anything at all. He waits until she’s completely out of site to break down. He hunches over with his hands on his thighs, barely able to breathe, tears falling like raindrops on the pavement.

~~~~~

Logan walks back in through garage door with his head down goes straight up to his loft without saying a word. Colt still hasn’t moved from his spot on the couch, but now that Logan is back, he’s not waiting around any longer. He gets in Gabi’s car and peels out of the garage. He has no idea where she went, but he takes his best guess, and sure enough he catches her heading towards the the bus stop. He honks to get her attention and she turns around, startled.

“Gabi, Get in the car.”

“Leave me alone,” she growls back at him.

“Come on. Let me drive you somewhere. It’s your car.” Maybe he can appeal to her practical side because nobody really wants to take the bus.

“Not anymore. I don’t want anything from you people.”

He honestly hadn’t expected her to be this mad at him. He was the only one who had the guts to tell her the truth. “Hey, we didn’t all lie to you like Logan.

“Yeah, because you care so much about me, humiliating me in front of everyone,” Gabi seethes.

That wasn’t his intention, but he can see her point. “If you’re gonna yell at me, at least do it up close from the comfort of the car. Besides...you’ll definitely regret letting your pride win next time you’re riding a bus to school.”

Gabi rolls her eyes but stops and gets in anyway.

~~~~~

Gabi can’t believe Colt thought he could just show up like a white knight and rescue her. He’s hardly apologetic, thinking he’s done her some great service by telling her about Logan. He finally seems to get how angry she is after she lays into him for not having a home to go to.

“Look, you have every right to be pissed at me. That’s definitely not how I wanted to tell you. But I hated knowing how that asshole was using you.

“How long have you known?”

“Dad didn’t tell me until after the Grapevine job. He didn’t tell me about anything at all until he had no other choice but to trust me. What was I supposed to do, knowing Logan was using you, knowing I wasn’t supposed to say anything? It was eating me up inside, and I just...snapped. I’ve seen the way you look at him. I knew the longer we waited, the more it would hurt you.”

That’s really what this is about, isn’t it? He knew she was torn between the two of him, so he threw it in her face when he was afraid he’d lose his advantage. “But you’ve seen the way I look at you too, haven’t you? Why couldn’t you of all people be honest with me?”

“It never seemed like the right time.” They pull up to Riya’s house and he looks at her sincerely. “You deserve so much more than Logan, Gabi.”

“And who can give me that, you?” She challenges.

“Hell yeah I can. The rest of the crew, they’re not like us. They’re just scraping by. But the two of us?” He brushes a strand of hair from her face and she feels the first bit of her resolve start to crumble. “We put our brains together, you and me could run this whole town.

Colt leans in closer and she stops him. “Colt...”

“All I’m saying is...You belong with someone who knows how much you’re capable of.”

Gabi meets his intense gaze, and she remembers why she fell for Colt so hard in the first place. He gets her and values her for what she’s worth. It’s dumb and she knows it, but she’s vulnerable and emotional and she just can’t help herself, leaning over the center console she captures Colt’s lips with her own.

Colt pulls away stunned but then a smile creeps back on his face. Like she’s lit a fire inside him, he responds, wrapping her in his arms and pulling her onto his lap. He parts her lips and kisses her deeply, and she lets a moan escape. “Colt...” His hands roam up and down her back leaving her skin alight with fiery trails wherever he’s touched.

“Is that a ‘yes’?

She feels dizzy, intoxicated by the sight, the scent, the feel of him. “To your whole ‘rule the world together scheme?”

Colt smirks. “That’s the one.”

Her world’s been turned upside down and she doesn’t know what she wants, except being with him in this moment. “The only promise I can make you about the future is that I’m gonna want a lot more of this.” Gabi gestures between them. She swings her leg over so she’s straddling him now, their hips pressed together.

Colt’s grin widens as he pulls her even closer. “Then I’ll just have to ask you again later.”

“As long as you keep kissing me in the meantime,” Gabi replies and Colt doesn’t wait for any further invitation. He kisses the curve of her neck, swirling his tongue around and sucking just hard enough, sending a rush of blood to her core.

“Like this?” Colt grins cockily, knowing exactly what he’s doing to her.

“Yes...” Gabi purrs. She closes her eyes and tosses her head back getting lost in the feeling. He kisses up to her ear, down her jaw, and back to her lips, his mouth leaving a path of electrical current in its wake. He swallows her moan with another fiery kiss, her hands tugging at his hair. “Colt...”

Colts hands wander to the hem of her sweatshirt. He plays with the fabric and strokes the sliver of bare skin there, tentatively, like he’s trying to gauge her reaction. Gabi tilts back slightly and grab’s Colt’s hand, surprising him. “What’re you...?”

She guides his hand under her shirt, relishing the feel of his calloused fingers against her soft skin. “Just touch me.”

Colt smirks again before descending to the dip in her collarbone and Gabi lolls her head to the side to grant his mouth better access. “Don’t have to tell me twice.” His hands creep up further and further until he’s tracing the curve of her breasts over her thin lace bra. She gasps as his thumbs graze her nipples, stiff peaks forming underneath.

Their lips crash together again, Colt’s unhooks her bra, and slips his hands underneath, thumbs tracing circles over her sensitive buds sending heat and wetness pooling between her legs. She grinds down onto him, and Colt groans. Even between their layers of clothing, she can feel how hard he is and she needs more. She rhythmically rolls her hips, rubbing her clit in just the right way to keep the pleasurable tingle building and building in intensity. Just as she feels she’s about to burst he pulls her nipples between his thumbs and forefingers, sending her over the edge. She bites down on his shoulder to muffle her whimper as waves of pleasure course through her body.

Colt stills and waits for her to look back up at him. “Did you just....?” Gabi nods, embarrassed. She’s only ever done that on her own, and she thinks maybe her inexperience is showing, like she shouldn’t have been able come just from that. “Hey, look at me.” He lifts up her chin. “You are so sexy, Gabi. I wish I could feel how wet you are right now.”

His words give her a resurgence of confidence. She stares at him intently as gets up on her knees, leaving enough space for her to guide his hand up the leg of her cut-off shorts. He doesn’t wait for a verbal invitation this time, pushing her panties to the side and gliding a finger through her folds. “Fuck, Gabi...” Colt moans. He dips a finger inside her. “I wish I could be inside you right now. If we weren’t on a public street in broad daylight right now....” He pumps his finger in and out a few times before withdrawing it, and if that feels this good, she can only imagine what the real thing feels like.

Colt kisses her again and when they come up for air, Gabi pulls back. “...Colt?”

“Mmm?” He mumbles as he distracts her with teasing kisses along her jawline.

“Where do we go from here?”

Her question finally causes him to stop and look her in the eye. “What do you mean?”

“I don’t think I can go back to the garage any time soon. Not after what Logan did, what your dad did...” She stares out the window, trying to find the right way to say it. “And I don’t think it’s such a good idea for you to be visiting me, for a little while, at least.” As desperately as she wants him now, she needs time and space to get her head sorted out, and that’s definitely not possible when she’s anywhere near him.

Colt softly and soothingly runs a hand up and down her back. “So let’s keep driving. We can go anywhere.Just say the word and I’ll start the engine.”

“Colt...I can’t just leave my entire life behind. I’ve still got my family.” She hopes, at least. “I can’t just leave my dad completely. It would break his heart...and mine. You understand that, don’t you?”

“Yeah. Yeah, I do. I just hate the idea of going back without you.”

“Well, maybe next time you’ll come talk to me privately before getting in a big fight and blabbing my business to the entire crew.” She’s half joking, but she’s still not completely over it.

“...Fair point. Can we kiss and make up? He smiles cheekily.

“I thought that’s what we were doing?”

“No, you were talking, I was trying to--”

Gabi doesn’t let him finish, cutting him off with a kiss and melting into his embrace as he pulls her close. Leaning back Gabi’s eyes search Colt’s face and his gaze never falters. “...Thank you.”

“For what?”

“For seeing my worth.”

Colt reaches up to cup her cheek. “You shouldn’t thank me for that, it’s the very least I can do.

Gabi smiles and leans into his touch, wishing she could freeze time for a while and stay here safe and happy with Colt, but she knows she can’t. She leans down to kiss him again before they reluctantly get out of the car.

Colt tosses Gabi the keys. “Take the car, will ya? Toby’d never forgive me if I didn’t make you keep it.”

“How will you get back?”

“Don’t worry about me.”

Gabi nods and colt shoves his hands in his pockets, rocking back on his heels. “See you around, Colt. Maybe” Colt nods with a somber expression on his face. She stays and watches him go until he’s out of view and then heads to Riya’s door to grovel for her forgiveness.

~~~~~

Gabi knows Riya won’t be thrilled to see her, but their reunion is rough to say the least. Riya isn’t happy with the idea of Gabi staying, but she agrees and leaves Gabi to get some rest while she goes to school. Things aren’t much better when Riya gets back, but Riya agrees to hear her out, and vents her own frustrations about Gabi moving on and not being there for her. They still have a long road to get back to where the were, if that’t even possible, but Gabi feels like she has her friend back. She talks Riya into an old fashioned sleepover with scary movies, snacks, and all.

It’s not long before Riya presses Gabi on what happened to make her leave the garage. She takes a deep breath and lets everything out. Tells her how Kaneko and Logan had targeted her, but that Logan claims his feeling are real. How Colt sat on the information until he could use it at his convenience, but that he’d do just about anything for her.

Riya’s eyes go wide. “Woah. That’s a lot to take in. But how do you feel?”

Gabi sighs. “I still don’t know. I thought Logan was my first love. I felt so deeply for him but he destroyed my trust. When he said he loved me, there was a moment I wanted to jump in his arms but-”

“Wait, he said he loves you? Oh my god, Gabi!”

“I wanted to believe him. I think I do, but I just can’t deal with that right now. If it were just him it would be hard enough, but I started to care about Colt just as much. When I’m with him, I forget about everyone and everything, and it’s just us. He was ready to drop everything for me and go wherever I wanted, and part of me almost considered it. But what would I be getting into? Colt thinks he wants this life as an organized crime boss, but is that really me? When I’m in it, it’s exhilarating and feels like I’m part of something big, but when I step away for a minute, like right now, I wonder what the hell I’m doing. I told Colt it would be best to have some time apart given all the circumstances, and I know Logan won’t come looking for me. This school year is almost over, and I can’t blow it now. Maybe if I focus on my studies, patching things up with my dad, and keeping my distance for a while, I’ll be able to see things more objectively.

“Wow, Gabi. I don’t even know what to say.” Riya leans in to give her a hug. “I’m here for you, but please don’t shut me out again.”

“Deal.” Gabi squeezes Riya back. “Now lets get back to watching movies, stuffing our faces, and forgetting that boys exist.

#playchoices fanfic #ROD #colt x mc #logan x mc #colt kaneko #rod logan #n*fw

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mrs-mystica · 5 years ago

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Fight For Me [Prinxiety]

Pairing : Roman and Virgil (Romantic)

Author’s note : This was a challenge for me. I had a hard time to write this, but I really wanted to write this story. Hope you’ll enjoy it!

Masterlink

Human/Medieval AU(?)

Third Person POV

In a kingdom, far, far away, there was a king and a queen, who ruled over their land with a lot of care. They wanted nothing but the best for their people, and they always stood by their principles. This also applied to both their sons, Roman and Remus. There was a tradition that was passed from generation to generation in the royal family. To be sure to have the best of the best on the throne, princes and princesses were trained from their young age to the art of the sword and self-defense. All potential heirs had to go through this training, no matter their position . And their other half also had to be worthy. But how to be sure that a strong individual would be sitting on the throne next to the royal heir? To win the hand of the princes, a duel against them must be won.

Contenders would be coming from all across the land, even from distant lands, just to test their luck to win a place on the throne. Men, women or non-binary people, it didn't matter. Anyone could challenge one of the princes. The crown was open for every challenger. But the princes wouldn't let the place next to them to anyone. They trained, and trained, to make sure that they could repel any contenders that they didn't like or find worthy of their love.

The two princes had different views toward this tradition. Remus hated it. People would continually come at the castle door to challenge him. He knew they weren't there because they thought he was particularly good-looking. He knew that he didn't care enough of his appearence, his hair being always messy and his clothes usually being ripped or stained. Thus, he knew his challengers were lying when they told him they were blinded by his beauty, that they wanted to fight for his love. He hated those hypocritical good for nothing, and for a long time he took an immense joy to make them bite the dust. But it became boring after a while. So he had an idea. He declared that he would fight to death anyone who would challenge him for his hand. You either win his hand, or you die. Needless to say that it worked pretty efficiently.

On the other hand, Roman thought this tradition had its charm. He found the idea oddly romantic and he was determined to find his soul mate. Normally, princes and princesses would only accept one challenge a day, but Prince Roman thought that the more he fought, the more he had the probability to find the one who would win his heart. He would fight anyone who would show off the slightest interest in him. He fought so many people that he ran out of pretenders. Annoyed and bored, he would wander in the little town near the castle, his sword sitting in his scabbard, searching for someone to challenge. It was pretty uncommon for a member of the royal family to wander near the villagers, and it was even less common for a prince to challenge people for his own hand. Prince Roman surely was one of a kind.

On one of these days, he would witness scenes of the everyday lives of his subjects. An old woman selling fruits, children playing tag together, a man kissing a woman on the cheek, a cat sitting on a roof and watching the humans from above... Prince Roman likes to watch the town moving around him. It helped him fight the boredom from not fighting. It was all he would do in his free time. Either training, fighting or trying to find someone to fight him. Maybe he was a little obsessed, he thought.

A sound caught his attention. Someone was begging someone else to stop with a broken voice. The prince was alerted by the voice and he followed it. In a dark alley, between two stores, he saw one man holding another one, while a third one would kick their victim in the stomach. Two of those men were laughing and the broken voice belonged to the other one. He looked hurt, but there were no tears in his eyes. He was looking at his aggressor with a stare filled with hatred. Roman could feel a shiver going through his spine, although he didn't truly understand why. He didn't know the man in front of him, but as a prince, it was his duty to intervene and to protect his subjects.

- HEY!

He called out the men. The two attackers jumped and froze when their eyes saw the prince. Roman had already unsheathed his sword and he pointed it at the men.

- This is a royal order. Release him. Or else...

Filled with fear, the two men dropped their victims and flee the scene as fast as they could. The poor man fell on the ground, cursing as he touched to cold hard ground under him. He rubbed his stomach, trying to make the pain go away. The prince put back his sword in its scabbard and approached the man.

- Are you alright, my dear citizen?

He put his hand in front of the man, palm facing the sky, inviting him to take it to help him get up. The man looked at the prince, and it was at this moment that he truly saw him. He had thick black hair who partially fell onto his face. He had deep black eyes, beautiful eyes that he couldn't help but to stare at. And those lips. A thought came through his head, noting that he sure had pulpy lips for a tough looking guy like him.

Both men stared at each other for a moment, until the dark man finally took the hand and got up. The prince was hypnotized by the man in front of him. He only managed to say two words.

- Fight me.

He didn't realize how weird it would sound out loud. The thankful look on the man's face was quickly replaced by fear. Roman cough, trying to break the awkward vibes that were now suffocating both of them.

- What I mean... is... erm... You know who I am, right?

The scared man carefully nodded, afraid that saying the wrong thing would make him ending up between the guard and the tip of the sword. Roman sighed. He definitely didn't mean to scare the man like that.

He couldn't place another word that he was interrupted by two newcomers. Two other men appeared in the alley, both wearing glasses. One of them was wearing a tie and the other one had a cardigan attached around his shoulder. They both were wearing blue clothes, one baby blue and the other navy.

- Virgil! Oh Virgil! There you are!

One of the two men covered the distance that was separating him from them and he hugged the dark man. He looked relieved.

- I'm so happy to see that you're okay!!! We were so scared! You didn't come home at your usual time and we were afraid that something had happened to you!

It was only when the third man, the one wearing a tie, put a hand on his shoulder that the newcomer realized there was someone else in the alley. He broke his embrace and gasped as he recognized the prince.

- Oh my lord! Prince Roman!! What gives us the honor to be blessed by your presence?

The man laughed nervously, clearly uncomfortable by the royal presence. He wondered what he was doing with his precious son Virgil. Did something happen? He sure was worried.

The prince took a dramatic pose, his hand in the air, trying to look awesome and at his best. He smiled, showing his perfect teeth.

- I, the wonderful and brave Roman, am here to challenge this man in a duel for a place by my side on the throne.

The two newcomers looked at him like he was hit on the head or something. Now Patton was sure that something had happened. But the prince, really uncomfortable, didn't let him the time to speak that he spoke again.

- Tomorrow, when the sun rises, you will come to the arena next to the castle, and you will duel me in a sword fight. I look forward into fighting you, Virgil.

He gave the dark man his sweetest smile before leaving the scene. Virgil. It was a name he was not ready to forget.

***

The three men were now back in their home, all sat at their table. What was once confusion had turned into fear. Virgil was panicking.

- What the HELL am I suppose to do?!

- It's okay, it's not a big de--

His second dad, Logan, tried to reassure him, but Virgil was too far gone. All the emotions he was feeling, it was too much for him. The prince was awesomely good looking, he felt helpless when their eyes met, he was speechless and unable to say anything, blinded by his beauty. And since their encounter, he couldn't stop thinking about him, even thought it was only an hour ago. And it seemed he made a great first impression to the prince because he now had a chance to challenge him for his hand. But what if he threw it? What if he messed up? Prince Roman was the best sword wielder of the entire kingdom. Did he even stand a chance?

- The ONLY thing I can wield is a knife! Tomorrow will be a DISASTER!

Patton wanted to reassure his son so bad, but he didn't know what to say.

- I will never be happy. This is a chance of a lifetime, and I'll blow it...

Logan hated to see his child like this. Suddenly, he got up, went out of the room and came back with two swords.

- I will train you.

The two men looked at him with a confused look. Logan sighed, but kept his determined look in his eyes.

- Ok, I've never actually wield one of these, but I've read plenty of books about the art of the sword. With some training and experimentations, I'm sure we can transform theory into practice.

With tears still in his eyes, Virgil looked at his father, unsure. Logan gave him a reassuring smile.

- We will get through this, together. And if you lose, you will at least have given your best. What do you think?

It took Virgil some time to take a decision, but he looked at his brother, a determined look now in his puffy eyes.

- Alright. Let's do this.

***

When it was finally time for the duel, Virgil hadn't slept at all. He and Logan had trained all night, trying their best to execute what was in Logan's books. He wished he had more time to prepare, but he had no choice. Adrenaline was already going through his veins when he arrived in the arena. A wave of anxiety hit him when he stepped into it. Virgil thought he looked ridiculous. Since he didn't have an armour of his own, he had to borrow someone else's and it definitely was too big for him. He was floating in it. It sure wasn't ideal, but what other choice did he have?

The seats were all taken, a lot of people had gathered to watch the daily dual of Prince Roman. They were loud, really loud. They didn't seem to notice him at first, they all seemed busy talking at each other, waiting for the show to start. The dark man looked through the crowd until he finally saw his family. Logan and Patton were waving at him, giving him thumbs up to tell him that everything was going to be alright. At their sight, Virgil relaxed a little and the tension that was building up through his body decreased in intensity. Virgil continued to examine his surroundings. He then saw the royal family, sitting above all the other. Virgil noticed that they all looked bored, especially Prince Remus. They didn't seem to have noticed him yet, so Virgil assumed it was probably because Roman was having these challenges daily and it must become boring after a while.

Trumpets started to play, announcing the beginning of the show. The whole crowd went silent, their attention was now entirely focussed in front of them. A well-dressed man stepped into the arena and went in the middle of it. Virgil then noticed the big circle on the ground. He wondered what it was for. The man looked at the piece of paper in his hands. He started talking loudly, trying to be heard by the whole arena.

- Ladies, gentlemen and other precious citizens of our great kingdom, I welcome you all today for this ceremony wher--

- Cut the formalities and hurry up, ringmaster.

The king's voice was firm and loud. Virgil was surprised that he could hear him so clearly, even though he was really far away from him. The poor man in front of him was shaking in fear, not expecting to be cut by the king himself like this. He continued with a shaky voice.

- Yes my King. Everyone, please welcome today's challenger, Virgil Sanders.

The man invited Virgil to approach. The crowd was clapping and screaming, loudly. Carefully, he approached the man and stood next to him, waiting for the next instructions.

- And now, please welcome warmly our ''Really Obviously Muscular And Nice'' Prince Roman into the arena.

The cheers coming from the crowd were even louder. He looked at his right and saw Roman entering the arena. The man didn't think it was possible, but the prince looked even better than when he met him in the alley. He was wearing a big armour that was entirely painted white, with little golden ornaments along the line. He had the red logo of the kingdom painted on his chest and back. As the prince approached him in the middle of the circle, he could only think of how the armour was highlighting his attributes, especially his face. When Roman was finally next to him, they stared at each other, and the prince gave Virgil a tender smile. He was really happy that the mysterious man hadn't back down his challenge and that he was willing to give it a shot. It was worth a lot of points in Roman's book. Maybe he finally found the one he was looking for after all? He wanted him to be, but he refused to give up his hand easily. He had to fight him, like all the others before him.

- The rules of the challenge are simple. The two challengers must duel with their swords until one of them exit the circle traced on the ground. The last standing person in the circle is declared the winner. Do you, gentlemen, accepts the terms of this duel?

Both of them nodded, without looking away from each other. Virgil smirked, which destabilized the prince. He quickly regained his confident look and winked at Virgil. The arbitrator asked them to take a few steps back and to unsheathe their weapons, which they did. The arbitrator was ready to start the duel.

- En garde. Prêt? Allez.

And the duel started. Both men looked at each other, their knees bent a little so they were ready to jump at any moment. They were moving to their right, not stopping to look at the other, trying to evaluate their opponent. They were both on the defensive, waiting for the other to strike first, ready to strike back. Virgil's anxiety was at his highest, but he was not paralyzed by his own fears. It seemed that, for once, his anxiety decided to be on his side. His fight or flee instincts were kicking in, and he had no intentions of fleeing. His heart was beating like madness in his chest. It was like he could see everything, every little detail, every sound, he could sense it all.

They continued to walk in circles for some time. Roman was the first to move. He took a step forward, in Virgil's direction, and he executed a lunge, trying to hit his opponent's right. Virgil was quick to parry with the guard of his sword. Their faces were close for a second, which destabilized Virgil a little. He quickly made a leap backward when he noticed that Roman was trying to press his sword against his in an attempt to touch his chest with the tip of his sword. Virgil was careful, he was getting closer to the line on the ground. Roman charged again and their blades crossed a few times, emitting sharp sounds each time. It was pretty clear that Virgil was lacking experience with the sword. His movements were clumsy at times and his defense had serious weaknesses. If it was a duel to death, he would've had a lot of opportunities to pierce through his heart. Knowing his opponent was inferior to him in the art of the sword, Roman got cocky. He thought he could end this duel anytime he wanted, but first he wanted to play a little bit with his prey. Roman leap back and opened his arms, taunting Virgil to come get him. The dark man didn't fall for the trap and instead taunted back the prince. It made Roman giggles.

He quickly covered the distance between them and assaulted his opponent with a series of quick hit. It was too fast for Virgil and he couldn't parry them all. His plate chest was assaulted and he had to take steps back at each hit. Virgil knew he was getting dangerously close to the line. Roman knew his strategy was working. When he got Virgil close enough to the line, he took a step back and prepared his next move. The crowd was cheering and screaming his name repeatedly, it boosted Roman's confidence. He wanted to finish in beauty with a Fleche. It was a hit or miss situation. Roman gained momentum and rushed in Virgil's direction. But Virgil had noticed that the prince was preparing something. And when Roman struck, Virgil was ready and he immediately moved to his left. Roman had already crossed his legs and it was too late to go back. He tried his best to regain his stance, but Virgil pushed him forward with his hand, dooming Roman to fall forward.

- Halte!

The duel had ended, Roman had crossed the line. The crowd had become silent, and for a moment, Virgil was afraid he had done something wrong, but then the crowd screamed and cheered, louder than they ever cheered before in the duel. They were screaming his name, ecstatic to have a new prince. Virgil felt so proud, a big smile had appeared on his face. He went next to Roman and offered him a hand, to help him get up. The prince giggled and took the offer, getting up, hands in hands with the man who had just won his heart. They gazed at each other and, for once in his life, Roman wasn't angry to have lost.

- Well done, my dark prince.

They were staring at each other, smiling like idiots. The prince put one of his hands on Virgil's cheek and whispered to him as he got his face closer to his.

- I'm happy it is you.

And they kissed, sealing their fate together as lovers and future husbands.

3267 words

A.N. : I have an idea for a bonus scene staring Deceit and Remus in this universe. If this is something that would interest you, please tell me !

#sanders sides #fanfiction #prinxiety #virgil sanders #roman sanders #logan sanders #patton sanders #remus sanders #romantic

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i-can-get-extra-with-my-ships · 5 years ago

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A Slice Of My Love Chapter 3. Kiddo?

Hello children! Once again, I am present with a story about an insane boy, and a piece of bread. Well, this chapter isn’t about the bread as much as it is about a dad worried about his dark strange son.

This chapter goes a little far back from where chapter 2 ended. Actually to the beginning of chapter 2. But from a different point of view. (I’ve given you two hints as to who’s POV it’s from.) Also, no angst in this chapter. Just stupid humor.

Pairings: The glasses gays. (Aka Logicality, you wanna know why we be doing the glasses gays show today? BECAUSE I AM THE GODDESS OF WHAT HAPPENS IN THIS FIC!!! I COULD FUCKEN END A LAIFU UP IN HERE IF I FELT LIKE IT!!! I don’t tho.)

Tw: Major “What the fuck is wrong with Virgil” moments but not “What the fuck” because Patton doesn’t curse, Patton rambling, a little Patton breakdown, cursing (Only in the A/N tho. Because I like to run my mouth apparently)

Patton’s POV

----

I couldn’t believe it. Virgil wasn’t taking care of himself at all!! As far as I knew, he hadn’t slept since he locked himself in his room. I didn’t even know what I was saying at this point. I was too tired and too worried at the same time.

“Kiddo you need to sleep! This is so terrible for you!! You haven't slept in GOD knows how long!!!”

He was staring at the counter, well, the bread bag to be more specific. Logan’s been teaching me how important being specific is. Virgil looked like he was debating with himself, then he started to stare with interest at the bread. What’s so interesting about bread? I thought.

“Virgil are you even-” He cut me off.

“Hey, Pat?”

“Yeah, kiddo?”

“Who’s that guy on the counter?”

In that moment I thought he was insane. I didn’t want to show it, but I know I did. I just stared at Vee, then the counter, then Vee, then the counter. This went on for a little while before the shock left. “Virgil, are you sure you’re ok? There’s no one there.”

“I’m never ok. But there is someone there. He’s just chilling on the counter. Staring at us.”

If I didn’t look at him like he was insane before, then I totally did this time. I felt like physically fighting him at that self-deprecation, but now wasn’t the place or time to do so. He started to drink his coffee again. Most likely to drown out the silence.

I didn’t know what to do. But I had a hunch as to who would know. Granted, he’s probably sleeping. I don’t want to worry him with Virgil’s not sleeping, and the fact that I’m up at 3 am. But, he’d much rather I come to him than try to solve a problem that I don’t know how to. I’m gonna go ask Logan.

“Excuse me for one moment kiddo.” Then I went back upstairs.

Once I got to Logan’s door I hesitated. Are you gonna knock on the door or what? Are you crazy!! We can’t knock on the door!! Logan’s gonna be so ticked that we woke him up!!! I’M CRAZY??? Hun, you’re the crazy one!! Logan loves us!! He won’t be ticked for very long if we go ask him for help with the Virgil thing. But- Butts are for sitting. Our kiddo needs to sleep. I honestly think that he’s going insane!! We need to help him. If Logan is the only way to do that then so be it. FINE!!

After the miny argument with myself had resolved itself, I knocked on the door.

“Patton? What brings you here at this hour?”

Logan’s voice was layered thick with exhaustion. He was still in his normal outfit of jeans, a black polo, and tie. However, his hair was a mess and his glasses were slightly askew. He must’ve fallen asleep at his desk.

Oh god. I immediately regretted my decision. As I was just about to turn around and go downstairs, Logan invited me inside.

“Patton, you can come inside if you so wish.”

I didn’t need to be told twice.

I practically ran inside his room. Then I started pacing, and rambling.

“Logan, we gotta problem. Virgil hasn’t been sleeping and I think there’s something wrong with him. He thought that there was a person sitting on the counter when really there was only the bread bag. And I know that it’s like 3am and that I should be sleeping and that I shouldn’t have bothered you at 3 am with this stupid kind of stuff. But I-”

Logan must’ve been really tired. Like REALLY tired. On a normal day, I would have never expected him to do what he did next.

He kissed me.

Like we’ve kissed before, but when I start to ramble he just sits there and listens, or he interrupts me and tells me that I’m being ridiculous.

He’s never cut me off by kissing me.

It isn’t a very Logan thing to do. If anything, I’d expect Roman to do something like that. But not Logan.

Now, I’m not complaining. It was amazing. Logan is a really good kisser. It was just really unexpected. And most likely the result of it being 3am.

Once we broke apart, I started to blush like crazy!! I’m talken like ears red and everything. Once Logan realized what he’d done he jumped on the blush boat really quickly.

“I apologize for that sudden outburst Patton.” Between you and me, he hardly kept a stri gay face. (Must I remind you, none of the sides can do anything straight? They’re all gay.)

“But I’m not that sorry at the same time. You were ranting again. All I understood from that was ‘And I know that it’s like 3am and that I should be sleeping and that I shouldn’t have bothered you at 3am with this stupid kind of stuff.’ Like we’ve been over several times, if it’s big enough to bother you, it’s not stupid.”

His tone of voice was soft. It was the same tone when Thomas became “Mr. Sanders” temporarily. (I’m thinking the “Morality, what are we doing wrong?” tone.) I’m pretty sure he’s only used this tone with me. It made me feel special, to have such an amazing person care for me so much.

“You’re right.” I started. I took a deep breath to calm me down, and to hopefully help me not rant this time. “Virgil hasn’t been sleeping. I’m assuming since he locked himself in his room. And I think he’s starting to lose it. He thought that someone was sitting on the counter when really, it was just the bread bag.”

My voice quivered and threatened to speed up, but I managed to keep relatively calm during that statement. Emphasis on that statement.

The reality must’ve sunk all the way in, after saying it out loud, or something. Why? Because at that moment, I almost started to cry. Logan noticed this and pulled me in close for a hug before I started crying.

“See? There we go! I could understand you. Now I can help you.” He kept the soft tone of voice. If we’re all being honest here, that tone of voice could turn me into butter in seconds!!

“Why don’t we go downstairs and check on him. Then we can see what we can do to help.”

Why did I ever doubt coming to Logan for help? He can seem cold, but he is the most caring and amazing boyfriend anyone could ask for.

“Thank you, Logan.”

I must’ve not have been functioning like a normal human being, as well. What I did wasn’t a very me thing, at all. But I got to pay him back for earlier. This time…

I kissed him.

Short and sweet, but still.

Once we got downstairs, I half expected to see Virgil either:

Sitting on the counter drinking from the coffee pot.,

Sitting on the tabletop drinking from the coffee pot or,

Passed out at the table or anywhere really.

But I didn’t expect to see a piece of bread sitting on the couch, Virgil standing halfway between the commons and the kitchen, bright red, like the kind of blush that the blush boat brought earlier, and him saying “Okay. Don’t quote Heathers at me and just walk away.” to the bread.

He ran to a weird random spot. Logan was going to say something. I put up a hand to tell him not to.

“Excuse me. Hi. Uhh… I never did catch your name.” Virgil went even more red with that statement. He stood there in shock almost. Like he saw and heard something that we couldn’t.

Logan and I looked at each other and then Virgil. I don’t think Logan had fully grasped the situation from what I told him upstairs. Now, standing here, watching Virgil quote one of the musicals that he quotes with Roman, by himself, with a piece of bread sitting on the couch, I think we both grasped how crazy the whole thing was.

Logan cleared his throat and I finished his thought for him.

“Kiddo? Why are you talking to yourself?

----

I know that it is Friday, but it’s not 11:59 pm. I am still victorious!! I have no clue where I want to take chapter 4. I might be coming down with writer's block. Who knows?

I don’t think I’m ever gonna stop with that cursed phrase.

I hope y’all liked this chapter. I personally think I could have done better but I still like it.

The random person on the internet who claims to be your mother,

(P.s I’ve run out of weird ways to do the sign off already. I really suck at this.)

----

Taglist (Lemme know if you wanna be added or removed): @winterswishing-reblogs @thetomorrowshow @iixclementine @just-some-gt-trash

Umm... @stop-it-anxiety-official you said that you liked to be tagged? I’m the person who sent you that ask about Virgil and the piece of bread and how stupid it was. This is the third chapter but this is some of the stupidity. Sooo... umm... yeah?

@just-some-gt-trash I’m so sorry you weren't added sooner!! You hid the fact that you wanted to be added in the tags. I only just saw the tags!!!

#A Slice Of My Love #Em's crappy attempts at writing #Yeah.#Chapter 3 #I don't have much to say.

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ilovemygaydad · 6 years ago

Text

Dance, Dance

Part One: Introductions

Based off this post that you really need to read for context!

Pairings: Analogical and Royality (past sleeplogical)

Characters: Virgil, Patton, Logan, Roman, Sleep/Remy, Deceit/Dominic, October/Toby, September/Ember

Warnings: domestic abuse, swearing, sexual humor, crude comments, bullying, making out, abusive deceit, i can’t think of anything else but tell me if you want me to tag something

A/N: Thank you to @wisepuma23 for being excited about this for me! Also, if the scenes seem weird, it’s because I’m trying to incorporate a bunch of povs because the movie is like that and it’s!!! important!!! oh and uhhhhh sorry for not writing since literally before the new blog but i’m dumb so yeah

Masterlist | Ask Blog | READ ON AO3

The shrill call of the intercom startled Virgil awake. It beeped, but no voice came out. Frustrated, Virgil slammed the talk button and spoke through gritted teeth. “What?”

“Virgil, do not get sassy with me. Your phone privileges are still on thin ice,” Dominic drawled.

“Of course. Sorry.” Virgil wanted so, so bad to bludgeon the damned intercom.

“Get me breakfast. I want eggs benedict and a grande in a venti cup of nonfat vanilla chai tea filled to the top with cream and three Stevias. THREE! Oh, and bring it here in five minutes. And get the twins their breakfasts.” The intercom clicked off.

Great! Virgil thought. What a totally realistic goal for me to accomplish. Fucking kill me.

And, needless to say, Virgil didn’t have the stupid eggs and the even more stupid drink in five minutes, so Dominic made Virgil cough up his phone for the next two months. And then the twins dumped their smoothies onto him because they weren’t right. Virgil had to change his clothes and then make new smoothies.

Virgil barely made it out the door in time due to his chores, and then he almost forgot his skateboard, so by the time that he had rolled up to Patton’s beat-up van, he was late. Patton gave him a quizzical look, but he just shook his head and climbed into shotgun.

Once they started their journey to school, Virgil actually took in what Patton was wearing. The top half was pretty normal looking; Pat’s purple-streaked curls were neatly swooped back, and he had on one of Virgil’s old flannel shirts. On his bottom half, he had—

“Patton, are you wearing a blue tutu?”

The friend in question grinned. “Yeah! I think that it perfectly fits my playful personality!”

Virgil suppressed a smile. “It sure does, Pat.”

“I think I’m going to add tutus to my future fashion line. It’s a winner for sure. And then I’ll get famous, and you’re going to become an all-star dancer, so I can pick you up in my private jet for lunch in Paris!” Patton spoke animatedly, flinging his hands around and ignoring the road. Virgil, practically used to it already, took the wheel in his own hands to make sure they wouldn’t go off road.

“Dude, I have to get into dance school before I can become famous.”

“Yeah, but you’re gonna!” Patton waved dismissively at Virgil’s worries. “Oh, anyway, did you hear that Logan Parker is coming back today?”

“Obviously. I live—turn right—with Toby, Ember, and Dominic. I never hear the end of that shiiii… stuff. Never hear the end of that stuff.”

Patton shrugged. “Fair.”

Virgil rolled his eyes and began to rummage around his pocket for a second, pulling out a pan of black eyeshadow. He flipped down the visor to use the mirror, but as he let go, the whole visor clattered to the floor, completely unhinged. “Fuck, Patton. Would it kill you to fix this thing?”

“Don’t upset her! She’s sensitive, and I don’t want her breaking down on me!” He paused for a second before smirking at his best friend. “Plus, it’s not like you really need the mirror to apply your eyeshadow, anyway.”

“Fuck off.”

“Oh, you love me.”

“I wish you were dead.”

Patton just smiled pleasantly, pulling into the parking lot. “Okay, dear.”

It took a whole ten seconds to swipe on the eyeshadow under Virgil’s eyes. As soon as he was done, he stepped out of Patton’s awful van and took a step onto the sidewalk.

“Honestly, Ember. I can’t believe you still drink those awful frappuccinos! They’re so full of sugar,” Remy Sinclair drawled, driving his silver convertible with his two cronies. “Black coffee is obviously superi—oh.” Remy had spotted Virgil.

Shit!

The black coffee in Remy’s hand flew right onto the front of Virgil’s shirt. The boys in the car all laughed; though, it sounded more like a cackle. “Oh, Virgil. I’m so sorry!”

From the van, Patton started to yell, “You’ll be sorry when I shove my fist up your—”

Virgil rushed to put his hand over Patton’s mouth, and Remy just drove away.

“Loganloganloganloganloganlo—”

“Roman, I swear to god. If you don’t stop that insufferable babbling, I will throw you out the window of this limousine on the 405.”

Roman pouted. “You won’t pay attention to me.”

“Yeah, well,” Logan muttered as he flipped over his schedule again. “I would like to know where my classes are so I don’t look like an idiot on my first day back.”

“You’ve read that thing a billion times! Can’t we get hyped for all of your fans—”

“Roman. For the last time, I am here to learn. You are free to spend your time frivolously flirting with every guy with a pulse; however, I am dedicating this year to my education.”

“Ugh, fine. You’re no fun!” Roman huffed, crossing his arms. “Are you at least excited for school?”

Logan smiled at Roman for the first time during their ride. “Yes, actually, I am. Thank you for asking. Are you?”

“I’m excited if you’re excited. You know how much I love to see you smile, man.”

“It almost sounds like you’re into me, Ro,” teased Logan. Roman’s eyes widened for a second, but when he saw Logan’s tiny smirk, he calmed down.

“Mr. Parker?” The driver was looking at the duo in the rearview mirror. “We have arrived at the school.”

“OH MY GOD, IT’S LOGAN PARKER!”

“Oh my god, Pat, Logan Parker is here. What a surprise! It’s almost like he goes here again,” Virgil mocked, turning as a swarm of people ran to the entrance. When he wasn’t being shoved around, he was able to see Logan Parker’s tall, lean figure looming above most of the students fawning over him. Someone else—a slightly shorter and far more muscular boy in clothes more fancy than should ever be on a teenager—stood at his side, a charming grin on his face. But seriously, who wore black dress pants, a white button up, and a red vest to school? This kid, apparently.

Patton both physically and mentally tore Virgil from the scene. “C’mon, let’s get to class before we’re literally run over.”

Logan shot a panicked glance at Roman as the hoard of kids surrounded them. He was used to crowds, sure, but not at his freaking school! He was trying desperately to be a normal teenager for once, damn it! He couldn’t even arrive at school without making a scene.

“Hey, hey, hey, friends and fans!” Roman shouted. Logan recoiled away from the noise, physically feeling all of the love that he felt for Roman drain out of his body in one fell swoop.

The crowd screamed in response:

”I love you, Logan!”

“I’m your biggest fan!”

“Logan, I wanna fuck you!”

Gross. Why couldn’t people understand that he was ace?

“Right, well, I know that you’re all super excited to see Logan, but we’re here to learn! Well, he’s here to learn.” Roman made eye contact with a handsome boy and winked. “We’ll be doing a meet and greet after school—” Oh, and there was more of that screaming— “For now, though, we’re going to get to class! Part ways, everyone! Roman Ellington and Logan Parker coming through!”

Somehow—and Logan had no idea what kind of witchcraft that Roman pulled—the crowd made way for them to pass. As the pair walked into the school, Logan pulled Roman close.

“What the fuck do you mean ‘we’re having a meet and greet after school,’ Roman?” he snarled. His bright smile never faltered.

“I had to placate them somehow! And it worked, didn’t it? It’ll only be an hour, and then you can go home and do whatever it is that you asexuals like to do.”

“God, don’t phrase it like that—and you owe me big time, Roman. Like, Crofters for a month big.”

Roman muttered something about how expensive that would be, but he cut himself off. “Shit! Logan, watch out—”

SMACK!

All of the books and papers that Virgil was carrying flew out of his hands, fluttering to the ground like snow as he was bumped to the floor. He had stopped paying attention for, what, two whole seconds, and someone just happened to slam into him. Not to mention that he probably had a concussion with how aggressively he was flung to the ground.

“Oh my god, I’m so sorry!” The voice paused for a second, and another one yelped. “Roman, what the hell did you push me for?” Virgil groaned and looked up.

Oh. It was Logan Parker. Great.

“It’s fine. Uh, don’t—fuck, ow—don’t worry about it.” Virgil vaguely waved his hand and shoved himself up into a sitting position.

“Here, wait. Let me help you up.” Logan held out his hand for a moment, but it was pulled away to spin him towards—what a fucking surprise—Remy. Who then pulled him into a deep kiss. Right in the hallway.

“Logan! I’ve missed you so much!” Remy squealed, ignoring the way that Logan winced and tried to protest. “Oh my god, I’ve got to show you the dance studio. You’re going to love it.”

And they were gone in a flash.

The weird dressed guy who was always with Logan stepped into Virgil’s line of view with an apologetic smile. “Uh, sorry about Logan, kind sirs. Things are still very wild after the move, though I’m sure you can tell.”

“Yeah…” Virgil said, rubbing his head.

The boy’s eyes flicked to Patton, and he smiled more genuinely. “Nice tutu.”

“Thank you! Uh, I think…” A light dusting of pink spread across Patton’s cheeks, and Virgil was already loathing having to deal with a crushing Patton.

“Of course! Oh, where are my manners? I’m Roman Ellington, Logan Parker’s best friend and manager. You guys can call me The Prince.” He winked at Patton.

Virgil decided that enough was enough. “Yeah, sure thing, Princey. Oh, and you might want to go after Logan. It looked like Remy was planning to drag him to the studio for some, uh, ‘dancing.’”

“Yeah…” Roman winced. “I’ll see you two later, um…?”

“Patton! And this is Virgil.”

Roman took Patton’s hand gently. “Until next time, dear Patton.” Roman kissed the hand as punctuation and walked away.

“Oh my god… Virge, I think I’m in love.”

“Jesus. Come on, Patton. I need to get you to a cold shower before homeroom.”

Part Two

#analogical #royality #sanders sides fic #thomas sanders fic #m writes things #cinderella!au #dance dance fic #virgil sanders #logan sanders #roman sanders #patton sanders

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