#some vv manipulative kyle energy exuding from this part 💀🥴

[bnhxx]

What Do I Tell My Friends?

Part one of a little yandere shinsou x reader fic I felt like doing! Ngl, it kinda hurt to do my man dirty like this but shinsou as a degenerate yandere is just....👌🤌 ya know ya know

(Also @gummy-dummy recommended me Mr. Fear by Siames for this series and ohhh it fits so well 😳🙏 we know im a hoe for song fics so if you want smth to listen to this song is perfect)

I tried to make this obvious, but Shinsou and Reader are college age here.

I was originally going to post the entire thing, but I got wayy too ahead of myself here ksbsjdvd.

Character: Hitoshi Shinsou

Ship: Hitoshi Shinsou x reader

Genre: Yandere, not canon! Shinsou (yandere shinsou is very ooc imo)

Warnings: Yandere themes all over this series, isolation, stalking, gaslighting, manipulation, emotionally abusive relationship, DEAD DOVE: DO NOT EAT!

part one | part two | part three | part four-final |

Since when did it become so hard to love Shinsou Hitoshi? Were you were meant to crumble and fall into his hands, subservient and malleable to his unseen desires? Maybe your fate had been cursed. Did you do something wrong in a past life?

You fell so easily into his arms, you could almost justify it as fate. He said you were meant to fall, all broken and desperate and clinging to his love. The same way he fell for you.

It had all started in a convenient accident. Your time, your glances, then your morning coffee was stolen; all by his convenient little accident.

It started out as an innocent mistake you wouldn't usually be so forgiving to. Your Tuesday morning coffee always gets you through the day so much easier after all. Still...Hitoshi, who came into your life as the guy who took your order instead of his was cute-and his impossibly strong coffee did you just fine for the day. Maybe that was it- a convenient, unfortunate accident.

Only it was never destined to be just that. What started as an accident on a gloomy Tuesday morning grew so fast-you were so innocent to what your new found friend had in store for you. Naive to the sick obsession unravelling before your eyes.

That fateful day, you kept getting reminded of the handsome, polite man. Purple blurred your vision on the way back to the office, then again on your way home. You were either seeing things, or that had been the third time you'd seen his lavender hair today. Maybe you were in need of an early night tonight.

Maybe you were over-reacting. The mornings events had put a rosey tint to the rest of your terribly busy day, that was all. There was no way your routes were this coordinated all of a sudden, right? You convinced yourself at the time you were seeing things. Laughed about it to your coworker, as they told you to give dating a second chance if you were fantasising over the first cute person who gave you attention.

The next day, he was at the coffee shop the same time, just about to exit. He insisted on paying you back for yesterday's mishap, even as you reassured him it was fine. You didn't even need to tell him your order- he knew it exactly from yesterday. He really was planning on seeing you again, huh.

So you decided to chat with the man while you both waited for your order to be made, and then some more before you went your separate ways. Shinsou was in university; yet he preferred to take late night classes and take the early morning shifts at his part time job.

"No wonder your coffee is so strong. I don't know how you do it! That takes some crazy dedication," That managed a ghost of a smile from him.

"Heh, thanks. I guess that means I'll see you tomorrow morning to?" He rubbed his hand over the back of his neck, and you beamed. You were hoping he'd say something like that; you were eager to know more about this attractive stranger.

"Of course!"

After that first week, he started showing up in your life more and more. It seems as though you both had a similar schedule, bumping into each other on your weekend jogs as well as your morning coffee runs. Then at the movie theatre that was airing your favourite show; coincidently, it was his too. Before you knew it, you were seeing Shinsou almost every week. Maybe you'd been too wrapped up in your intrigue to notice, but he was slowly covering all aspects of your life.

Your intrigue had turned to curiosity. And the more he crept into your life, the less you could help yourself. The more time you spent with Shinsou, the more you needed to crack open his mysterious, private shell. You liked all the same shows, enjoyed the same hobbies, even your values seemingly aligned. So why did it still feel like you were running a marathon trying to figure him out? Why did you get the strangest feeling he was already doing laps around you?

It wasn't just what you knew about him, either. He hardly introduced you to many of his friends and colleagues-you didn't even know if he had friends outside of you. And yet, he had seemingly made it his mission to know your own social circle like the back of his hand. Maybe he was bad at making friends? Protective of his new found friend? You let him tag along with your friends so they could get to know each other, but he never really made an effort to befriend them.

He would tell you it was because he didn't feel the need to be around anyone else, that you were enough for him. He laughed when you asked if he had many friends, and waved off your concerns. "A few. None like you, though," That earned him a blush. If he was treating you differently, maybe you should do the same. You started prioritising his time over your friends, much to their chagrin.

----

When you look back to the way he confessed to you, you wished you picked up on the signs then and there. He was an all consuming force in your life before; and yet, this was the complete opposite.

As if he was a ghost of your imagination, Hitoshi Shinsou had all but disappeared from your life. Not only had he not replied to your texts or calls, he was nowhere to be found in your routine, either.

You kept your eyes peeled for his familiar figure on your morning runs.

You swallowed your pride and asked the barista if they'd seen the lavender haired man at all; they offered you a sympathetic smile and shook their head.

You even took walks around the building where he claimed to work at, hoping to catch a glance of the man. It was to no avail; your efforts were all in vain. He slotted himself into your life so easily, only to slip out of your grasp just as quickly.

It hurt to have been so invested in him, the man that showed up out of nowhere and all but swept you off your feet, all to have it cut off so suddenly. Like vertigo, you stumbled through the rest of the week in a whiplash.

So when he came to you that Friday night, you were hesitant. If the guilt ridden look on his face was anything to go by, he was ready to apologise. Well, good. You were ready for an explanation.

He was seemingly ready for you to slam the door right in his face, and the look of shock on his face made your heart pang with guilt. He did say he didn't have many friends. Maybe he was simply busy? But, the way he went about ghosting you for an entire week hurt...well, he would explain for himself. The two of you could work things out, you were sure of it.

He was sorry. He didn't mean to distance himself so fast, so coldly. He only gave you one excuse.

"I guess you could say I got cold feet," he sheepishly excused.

"In truth...I was debating whether you'd accept me as something more than just friends," And you thought the past week had uprooted you. You blinked, and his sheepish, hopeful face (that was frustratinginly attractive even when you were mad at him) dropped.

"I mean, I really haven't gone about this the right way, have I? And for that, I'm sorry. I promise, I won't leave you in the dark like that again. But, if you'd hear me out for a moment..." That smile again...it really was going to be the death of you. With a nod, you sealed your fate that night.

At least he didn't try and buy your forgiveness with some expensive chocolates.

----

It was your second mistake to take his possessiveness as passion.

Darling as Hitoshi was when it was just the two of you, you found your new lover to have quite the jealous streak. Gentle teasing from your friends turned into back handed comments whenever Shinsou insisted to invite himself to your friends hangouts.

"Great, here comes the guard dog," You were almost afraid he would actually start growling at the next stranger who offered you a smile or wink as they passed you by.

You took your friends advice, and attempted to reassure him- for him to place more trust in your friends. Maybe they were occasionally late or flakey, but it didn't warrant such policing behaviour from him. If there was a problem, you could deal with it yourself. You didn't need to distance yourself from your friends any more than you already were.

It's like he thinks your some child who can't even tie their own shoes! The comment, from your friends last argument sparked something in you. It sat in the back of your mind and haunted you for weeks before you decided to confront Shinsou on his behaviour.

This only proved to make him more distressed. He started pointing fingers-who said that? What was her name, again? Wasn't she the one who left you all alone at that bar for some guy? You tried to tune him out, only to have those fingers turn to you.

Why were you defending all of your so called friends anyways? He'd given you all the facts, why couldn't you see they were clearly not deserving of your time like he was? They didn't see you like he did. Couldn't care for you, like he could. He gives you his everything, always; so why were you making him out to be the villian?

Perhaps you were too naive to call him an enigma. You weren't ready to admit it to yourself, but your friends were right. The tight leash he held on you wasn't passion-it was possession. His interrogations and guilting were never just trust issues, and a part of you knew it. Perhaps it was nothing but a pathetic, pitiful excuse on your end.

You had realised that you were in too deep a moment too late. If only you'd acted on it more sooner; Hitoshi Shinsou would remain the unsolvable enigma you wished you could have the resolve to unravel.

If only you weren't so stubborn to see it through.

"You're trying to defend them again, aren't you?"  He asked as you were one foot out the door of your shared apartment. This time he caught you sneaking out to see your friends. You felt like some rebellious teen acting out against their parents.

Like a kid who can't tie their own shoes.

You turned, frowned, and opened your mouth to deny his allegations as you always would. To reassure him that you love him, and understand his concern. To reiterate loving you didn't mean keeping you to himself in your shared apartment like a bird in a cage. These four walls sure were starting to feel like one.

Maybe you should've listened to the rumours you all but ignored. The ones that told you to never answer his questions.

----

When you first woke up, you had no knowledge of the past few hours-nothing, except Shinsou's shaking arms around you as his sobs muffled the apologies and pleas tumbling out of his lips. You tensed in his hold.

You wanted to glare icicles into his sunken, crumpled form. To scream and yell and curse at him for breaking your trust in such a way.

Even still...you couldn't. You couldn't bring yourself to hold your boundaries strong. To see your composed, mysterious, private boyfriend- before you, all frazzled, open and vulnerable.

It was a vulnerability you had never seen-yet always craved from him. Finally, you had unravelled his mystery. Under it all, he really was just a lovely, lonely boy with a unfair, cruel fate. He was clearly distraught with what he had done to you. Now wasn't the time for your pain. You had to stop yourself from lashing out for your own selfish reasons. You'd have a talk with him tomorrow, you promised.

This was your Hitoshi, you reasoned as he cried in your arms. He didn't have anyone else who trusted him like you did. He had closed himself off from everyone, because they didn't trust him- and neither did he, you realised as he clung to you and begged you not to leave him through his broken sobs. He didn't deserve to have you leave him. Not over one little mistake.

While you soothed his cries, you imagined everything to be better. Yeah, things would turn out fine. He would make it up to you and let you see your friends, and you could move to helping him trust more. To be a little less possessive, and a little more friendly. To not see you as the only light in his life.

Only, he never gave any indication to changing his mind before. Everyone else was always too kind to be trusted, or not doing enough. He could better spend his time with you, because you was perfect. Perfect when you were next to him.

You weren't naive enough to believe he would be the only person you'd need in your life. But you looked down at your boyfriends doubtful, teary eyed face. Poor, broken, vulnerable Hitoshi.

You'd tell your friends you were sick this time round and couldn't make it. Your time was better spent with him, anyways.

Next time, you promised, he'd be more accepting. He'd learn to trust others again. Just like you'd learn to trust him all over.

And as much as you tried to reassure yourself, a voice in your head spoke venom into your ear.

This won't be the last time he breaks your trust, it whispered.

"A bit of passion and possessiveness never hurt anyone, right?"

He gave you the first weak smile you'd seen from him all night, and you relaxed your face as much as you could. He didn't have to know you weren't talking to him.

He promised he'd never do it again. He couldn't-wouldn't. So you forgave him that day. But that little voice in your head weighed heavy in your heart-you knew, deep down, that you didn't believe him one bit.

It was time to start un-muting all of your friends notifications. You would text them more freely-baby steps. The thought warmed your smile into a genuine one.

----