#some of these quotes taken rl out of context to fit lol its fine

[intearsaboutrobots]

legally blonde (the musical) elle ships, as ranked by me:

elle/emmett (romantic): i am a bitter aro and kind of hard to impress wrt romance. THAT BEING SAID, i think they are a cute couple and they have good chemistry and the dept store scene does a lot of work here to get me invested.

rating: 8/10 “what’s that smell?” “love.... by calvin klein”

elle&emmett (qp): they never kiss or anything pre-time-skip so you legally cannot PROVE that their relationship is romo!! as a teen my fav thing abt this musical is that theyre kind of just best friends the whole time and like. yeah i was right. 16 yr old me knew wtf e was abt. this was absolutely formative and turned me aromantic.

rating: 100000/10 “guess you never can tell with little miss woods comma elle”

elle/vivian: so fucking good. let warner’s exes unionise. vivian staring directly at elle when she accepts warner’s proposal is for sure the behaviour of someone 0% attracted to the man proposing and definitely attracted to his ex.

rating: 9.5/10 “all that pink you’re wearing? is that even legal”

elle/enid: l o o k enid is in the harvard variations, shes supposed to be part of the harvard in-group as like contrast to elle. but also a professor mocks her for being gay in her First Class and so like maybe posturing her and elle as allies in different but not unrelated boats is like... better?

also i like the “chip on my shoulder“ dynamic but its two peers studying together instead of the TA or w/e (dont get me started on wtf emmett’s job is in this musical) And i think they could b a genuinely good pair and give each other some new perspectives on the world (in this context elle bringing up gloria steinem at the “costume” party is like also a callback to a convo betw her and enid earlier!!! guys it WORKS).

then they kiss.

rating: 10/10 “us girls have to stick together”

enid/elle&emmett: so first of all im very weak to this ship format, renardroi on ao3 has a gr9 w359 fic thats kepler/jacobi&maxwell and like, YES. its all the benefits of the ships alone combined!

it also cuts the like kind-of-weird-if-u-think-abt-it-too-much thing of her studying w the TA all the time by having a peer involved and emmett not like, so central, BUT it means we still get TAKE IT LIKE A MAN, UNCHANGED, bc i love that sONG and its VERY TRANS, ACTUALLY- (im forcefully dragged off stage bc thats a different post)

rating: 15/10 “you've got your future all planned, what if i’m standing there too”

elle/kate: kate, for those of u that somehow dont remember (/j she is so minor), is the girl who tutors elle for the LSAT and gets told off for chewing gum.

so FIRST of all, im very invested in learning more abt kate bc she obvs sticks out in the sorority and like it makes me wonder why shes there? she doesnt seem to be getting the same things out of it that everyone else is, like, what are her motivations yk.

also consider what if a like accelerated adapted riff on the elle/emmett romance happens over the time elle is studying for the LSAT.. im just saying i bet her and kate were pulling all-nighters... kate falls asleep on the couch in elle’s room and elle puts a pillow under her head and like puts a blanket over her.......... kate is gay and like not not-out but its not a thing she brings up unprompted usually and like shes like oh my godd i cant believe i hav a crush on a straight girl riP and elle’s like i am straight and also kates hair looks so soft and i want to run my fingers thru it. she asks kate Defs not jealously if she has a boyfriend and kate blinks and is like ...im a lesbian? and elle blinks and is like. oh! right! for sure! and isnt freaking out at all.

GOD

rating: 200/10 “what you want is right in front of you”