#some of the other ones i've got are long nonfiction or political texts that i know i'll never get through
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apocalypticdemon · 2 years ago
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for all i bang on about consumerism being bad i sure do like to purchase books, huh.
#i have bought. several. lately.#in my defense several of these are books that i have already read and really quite enjoyed or books from a series that i've been enjoying#like i got all the books from the wayward children series even though i've only read 3 or 4 of the 6 or so that are out#and part of me feels guilty about that bc i have also bought several books that i have not read#i'm trying to buy them at a discount so i'm not wasting a ton of money#some of the other ones i've got are long nonfiction or political texts that i know i'll never get through#in the span of a library loan#or that i want to annotate/mark as i read so i ensure that i grasp important sections#but like i do now have A Lot of books and i just got more today bc my self control is waning#and bc i'm going to school again soon and will be living on a dramtically reduced budget#but on the other hand i really feel like i should be buying stuff i need for living at school now#like not getting stuff i want but instead investing in like. stuff i can use for at-home workouts while at school#or a new pair of tennis or climbing shoes. etc etc.#so there's this weird guilt on top of the Wanting Of Things that i'm not really enjoying#idk i do feel like i'm leaning into some weird consumerist thing that i've def criticized online book people for doing#whether or not that's rational i'm not sure#bc what rubs me the wrong way is people who buy stuff and literally have no idea what it's about#and that seems a lil irresponsible and i have things to say about it#i'm sorry this is getting so rambly and off topic i'm just having a lot of thoughts about guilt and spending#and getting things i want vs rationing myself to only things i truly need#bc i lived for a while on the latter and only got stuff i Needed#instead of ever indulging myself with things that i wanted aside from like sweet snacks
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