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knox-knocks · 6 years ago

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Restart ~ Chapter 14

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There was a knock at the door. Frustrated, Neil twisted the pencil in his hands and tried to coax back the focus on his math homework he’d just lost. He was only starting to get into it; finally, the problems were beginning to make sense. They were a puzzle that gave him a thrill of satisfaction every time he found a new piece that fit. Usually Neil was good at math – quick, efficient, but he’d been struggling with this assignment all week.

The knock sounded again, an insistent rapping that chased away what was left of Neil’s concentration. Neil threw down his pencil and watched it bounce off his textbook and roll to the floor. When it landed somewhere near his shoes, he glared at the door and wished whoever was on the other side a slow death.

No one else was here to open the door, so that left the job to Neil. Kevin was at the store for groceries, not trusting his roommates to get food that was ‘actually edible and not something that’ll clog our arteries,’ as Kevin put it. Andrew wouldn’t get the door either, even if he wasn’t taking a nap in the other room.

Just when Neil thought that the person had given up and walked away, the third knock sounded. Sighing, Neil pushed himself up and went to go get it. It was probably Kevin, he’d already forgotten his key twice this month, Neil didn’t put it past him to do it again. He debated leaving him out there, punishment for making Neil lose the motivation to do his homework that he’d been scrounging up to all week.

When Neil unlocked the doorknob, whoever was waiting outside pushed their way in before Neil could even open it himself. Neil braced himself, his mind reeling with thoughts of his father’s men kicking in doors and Ichirou sneaking into houses while the inhabitants slept.

But it wasn’t the mafia knocking on Neil’s door. It was Dan, looking as she always did with her messy curls and determination in her eyes.

“Dan?” Neil asked, bemused. “Is everything alright?”

“We’re going out to lunch,” she replied. When Neil just stared at her she blew her curls out of her face and smiled that familiar grin of hers. It was a little early for lunch, but Neil decided to stop the complaint at the tip of his tongue when his stomach growled a reminder that he skipped breakfast that morning. Dan gave him a knowing look and shooed him away to get ready.

Bewildered, Neil made his way to the bedroom and snuck in, careful not to wake Andrew who was still nestled in a bundle of pillows and blankets on his bed. The only indication that anyone was under the pile at all was the tufts of blonde hair poking out near the pillows and the quiet snores that told Neil that Andrew was having a good nap. Neil paused in pulling a clean shirt and jeans out of his drawer when he realized Andrew had hisblanket as well. Neil huffed. He’d have to steal it back when he and Dan were done with lunch.

Neil shucked off his t-shirt and threw it in the direction of his other dirty clothes. When he turned around, he found Andrew blinking sleepily in the dim light.

“You’re loud,” Andrew mumbled, his voice scratchy from sleep. Something warm bloomed in Neil’s chest. He considered the strange sensation before he grimaced in apology.

“Sorry,” he whispered back, trading his sweatpants for the jeans. “I’m going to lunch with Dan so I’ll be back in a few.”

Andrew squinted up at Neil in consideration before his eyes drifted down to Neil’s bare chest. Neil stilled as he looked for a minute before nodding in sleepy appreciation and curling up further under the stolen blankets. He was asleep by the time Neil was finished dressing.

Neil left the bedroom to find Dan waiting for him to be done. “Come on, slow-poke. I want to be back before afternoon practice,” she said, already on her way out the door.

There was a slight bounce to Dan’s step as she led them out of Fox Tower. She’d been elated since the Foxes won the last two game of the death match, knocking out Belmonte and UT. The Foxes had run themselves ragged against the Longhorns last Saturday, but it was worth it when they came out on top with a score of 5-9.

If Neil was being honest with himself, he didn’t think he could feel excited about their success until they played their game against Penn State. Two more death match games, and then the last two games of semi-finals. Depending on how many points the Foxes racked up in those games – if they even make it through the death matches – they would be moving on to finals or they would drop out in round three.

Luckily for the Foxes, Edgar Allen and USC were both in the odds bracket for the death match. They’ll face each other next week and only one of them would be moving on to Finals, meaning the Foxes would only have to play two of the big three for the chance to take the Championships again.

The Foxes have to win four more games and Neil and Kevin have to overperform in order for Ichirou to consider sparing their lives. So far, so good. But Neil could never be too careful.

“Earth-to-Neil.” Dan snapped her fingers in Neil’s face, breaking him from his thoughts of winning and losing and life and death. “There’s this café across campus that I want to go to. I was going to go with Matt but he had to make up a test. You down?”

“Sure,” Neil said. He knew the café Dan was talking about. It was more of a retro diner like the ones Neil and his mother had slipped into during their years on the run. Even when they were nearly empty in the middle of the night, the greasy diners provided acceptable cover for Neil and Mary to hide in. Plus, no one ever asked any questions in those kinds of places. But the Fox Café was considerably newer and cleaner than all those other diners. Neil remembered going with Andrew at the beginning of the school year one night, but he wasn’t going to tell Dan he’d already been before. “Am I your replacement date?” Neil asked instead.

Dan scoffed. “Please. You’re too short for me, totally not my type. And anyway, this is business. Cap to Vice-Cap-Soon-to-be-Cap.”

“Shouldn’t you wait to see if I’m still going to be around next year before we talk about me being captain?” Neil asked wryly before he could stop himself. Dan’s grin slid of her face. Neil was surprised at the stab of guilt he felt in his stomach.

Dan pressed her lips in a thin line and started on the five-minute walk to the café. She regrouped quickly though, and turned back to Neil. “We’ve been winning our games so far, and we’re going to keep winning. Binghamton was a fluke. After we have the championship trophy, Ichirou won’t have any reason to hurt you.”

Neil hummed, not able to bring himself to meet Dan’s eyes. If Neil failed, he wasn’t going to just hurt Neil. He wasn’t going to receive a simple slap on the wrist and a demand to do better next time. This was it for him.

“I’m serious. We’re going to win this, Neil. And you’re going to be captain next year and win it all over again.”

“What if Ichirou decides he’s done with me anyway? Even if we win, there’s no guarantee he’ll keep me as an investment. I might be more trouble than I’m worth,” Neil said, finally voicing the thought that had been eating at him for weeks.

Dan stopped walking. When Neil realized she wasn’t by his side anymore, he turned around to find his captain with a furiously resolute look on her face. Nothing in the world could make Dan budge when she wore that expression. “It doesn’t matter, we’re not giving you up so easily. Ichirou can go fuck himself for all I care. We’re Foxes, and if he wants one of us, he has to go through all of us because Foxes don’t go down without a fight,” she said with the unbreakable confidence she would have needed to lead the Foxes all these years.

In that moment, Neil couldn’t help but admire Dan Wilds. She stood tall no matter the insults flung at her, from opponents and teammates alike. Not once did she give up or stand down. She was the strength of the team, the fire, the force that drove the Foxes to triumph. Now Neil wasn’t thinking about if he’d be captain next year, but how.

“You do realize that we aren’t going to let the Moriyamas take you so easily, right? You’re family, Neil. No matter what,” Dan said, her voice several shades quieter but lacking none of the steel from before.

Neil had to swallow several times before he could speak. “I know,” he managed to say around the lump in his throat.

Dan nodded in satisfaction and tugged on Neil’s arm. Neil could see the diner up a head and luckily, it didn’t seem to be too busy considering it was a Tuesday and classes should be getting out. When they were seated, the waitress set out menus in front of them and then left with their drink orders.

“So…” Dan started. Neil looked up from the pasta section on the menu and found her studying him. “You’re going to be captain next year and – don’t give me that look, Neil Josten, we just went through this – how do you feel? Are you ready for it?”

Neil decided to let himself think of the future, if only to humor Dan. He pushed the imminent threat hanging over his head to the back of his mind and pretended that he was going to become captain of the Palmetto State Foxes no matter what. He took a deep breath and said, “Honestly? I don’t even know where to start. Even without the whole amnesia thing, I have no idea what I’m doing. Most of the freshmen don’t even like me.”

“They’ll listen to you,” Dan said as if it were a fact. “And if they don’t want to, then that’s their problem. You don’t realize it, Neil, but people look to you to know what to do. How much do you remember from last year?”

Neil tilted his head to the side and stopped himself from rubbing at the scar on his head. “Most of it, I think. Some memories are still blurry, but I don’t think there are any more gaps.”

“I’m glad to hear it.” Dan smiled in genuine delight. “And that means you remember how the team rallied around you last year. We were so divided, before you came along. Even after everything that happened, the Foxes were the most united last year when you pulled us together.”

“I…” Neil trailed off. He’d never thought of it like that. When he told Dan as much, she kicked him in the shin under the table, not quite hard enough for it to hurt.

“You are going to be a great captain, Neil. And if you need help, you have my number. Use it.”

The waitress came back with their drinks before Neil could respond. Dan thanked her when she set their drinks down to take out a pad of paper and a pen and asked if they knew what they wanted to eat.

Neil sipped at his water and let himself tentatively hope.

~ ~ ~

Several weeks later, the rest of the team had already deserted the locker room by the time Neil was done stuffing all his gear in his duffel bag. Neil had expected to be alone but when he zipped up his bag and turned around, Andrew was leaning against the other lockers with his arms crossed over his chest. His expression was calm and his posture relaxed. He let Neil look his fill before he turned away in a silent request for Neil to follow.

They’d won the last of the death matches and wracked up seven points in the game against the Terrapins. Tomorrow, Palmetto will play Penn State. They needed eight more points in order to secure their spot in Championships. Neil had spent the past couple nights tossing and turning thinking about it. While most people thought of Edgar Allen or USC, Penn State was still one of the highest ranked teams in the nation. Championship title or no Championship title, the Foxes would have to work hard in the game tomorrow. That thought alone was enough to make Neil lose sleep.

When Andrew and Neil made their way to where the rest of the team was waiting by the bus, Andrew snagged Neil’s duffel and went to throw it in with the rest of the luggage under the bus. Neil inclined his head gratefully and went to save their usual seat.

Even though the game wasn’t until tomorrow, Wymack wanted the team to have plenty of rest before the game so they were driving to Pennsylvania early. A cheap motel was booked so they wouldn’t have to sleep on the bus, and while Neil and Andrew were rooming with Kevin and Nicky, Neil was grateful for the extra rest. He didn’t want to have to worry about playing one of the most important games of the season after spending all day riding in a cramped bus.

Neil passed the front rows on his way to the back. Kevin shot him a look when Neil went by, but Neil ignored him. Usually when the Foxes drove to a game, Neil would sit with the rest of the strikers and talk about different strategies, but today Neil just wanted to spend as much time with Andrew as possible.

Once the bus was all loaded up and the team was situated, Wymack started the bus and pulled out of the parking lot. Andrew stared quietly out the window for the first hour of the ride while Neil watched him. With all the craziness of practice and games and classes, Neil and Andrew were left with very little time for just the two of them. They’d stolen moments here and there, quick, frantic kisses in the locker room after everyone else had left and a couple of minutes on the roof at night sharing a cigarette before they succumbed to sleep, but Neil still found himself craving the simple comfort of just being in Andrew’s presence.

“Staring,” Andrew pointed out without turning away from the window. When Neil only hummed in agreement, Andrew sighed in faux-exasperation and reached for Neil. When Andrew directed Neil’s head to his shoulder, Neil started in surprise before he melted into his side.

The hours of sleep Neil lost to worrying about the upcoming game finally caught up to him and Neil fell asleep against Andrew’s shoulder. He was just barely holding onto consciousness when Andrew placed his hand in Neil’s hair and kept it there.

Neil didn’t wake up until they were at the motel, and even then, he didn’t wake up until Andrew shoved him off his shoulder. Neil opened his eyes and glared but Andrew shrugged unapologetically.

“I was tired of you drooling all over my shirt,” Andrew said in explanation. Neil huffed and got up.

There was still several hours of daylight left until it started getting dark, so after they were done lugging their bags to their room, Nicky suggested they invited the other Foxes over and order takeout.

“I saw a Chinese place on the way here and I’m craving chow mein,” he said, rolling his eyes at Kevin’s disgruntled look at the mention of unhealthy food. “Don’t worry, Kev. I’m sure they have something there for you, too.”

Andrew didn’t seem to care what they did, but Neil thought spending the rest of the day with his team was a good idea. Nicky told Dan and Dan announced it to the rest of the Foxes. Within ten minutes, everyone was crammed in one of the small motel rooms, sprawled across the bed and scattered across the floor. Robin and Nicky were even perched on the coffee table.

When the food got there and the chaos of passing the cartons of orange chicken and chow mein around and arguing over who got the last of it was done with, Neil tucked into his fried rice. Most of the team chatted about this and that, but Neil was content to just sit back and watch.

After an hour, Andrew left to go to their room. Neil watched him go but decided to leave him be. He didn’t expect Andrew to stay the whole night and he knew Andrew tired quickly of social interaction after a while, so Neil wasn’t concerned. Andrew being there even for a little bit was enough. Neil turned back to the argument Dan and Allison were having about different celebrities and chimed in occasionally, even though he didn’t really know who they were talking about.

A movie about a fish trying to find his son that Renee found playing on one of the staticky channels was playing on the old TV. When Nicky noticed Neil was watching, he launched into a discussion about Disney movies. Neil remembered seeing a couple of them during movie nights, but he just let Nicky talk. Eventually Matt mentioned something, and even Robin commented on one of the movies Nicky was chattering away about.

“Are you worried about the game?”

Neil turned to the quiet voice behind him to find Kevin leaning against one of the beds, his legs pulled up to his chest. A plate scraped clean of whatever he’d been eating balanced on his knees. Kevin looked tired, but he also looked determined. The panic that Neil had glimpsed so many times before, the same panic Neil had felt, was nowhere to be seen.

“Yes,” Neil said. He didn’t need to say anything else, Kevin wasn’t looking for an explanation. He was in the same boat Neil was in, for the most part. He understood. Kevin just nodded and moved his plate to the side so he could stretch his legs out in front of him.

“I think we can do this,” Kevin said quietly. Neil couldn’t tell if Kevin was scared that he’d jinx it if he said it any louder or if he just didn’t want the others to overhear. A loud eruption of laughter from Matt and Nicky told Neil that they weren’t listening in to their conversation, but he kept his voice low as well.

“Yeah,” he said. “Me too.”

~ ~ ~

When Neil glanced at the alarm clock the next morning, the face read just a little after seven in the morning. Beside Neil, Andrew was still sleeping.

Last night, Neil came back to the room to find Andrew watching a dumb show on TV while he waited up for Neil and the others to get back. He didn’t remember falling asleep, he must have drifted off sometime between changing into sweatpants and settling in beside Andrew. Even after his long nap on the bus, spending the evening with the Foxes wore Neil down again. He loved them, but sometimes their rowdiness was exhausting for someone like Neil, who preferred the quiet.

He should have gotten up earlier to go for a morning run, but Neil really didn’t feel like it today. He would be spending plenty of time running around when the Foxes practiced before they played against Penn State, and even more when they played them. Right now, he was more than content to stay in bed for a little bit longer and study Andrew’s face, lax with sleep, smushed into the pillows.

Neil shifted, feeling the fatigue in his muscles fade away with every passing second. He briefly tore his gaze away from Andrew to look behind him at Kevin and Nicky sprawled across the other bed, arms and legs thrown off the sides and over one another. Nicky had his foot wedged between Kevin’s spine and the mattress, something Kevin would be sure to complain about when he woke up with a sore back.

When Neil turned back to face him, Andrew was already watching him with clear eyes. They stared at each other for a moment, stretching seconds into minutes. Neil was tracing the hard edges of Andrew’s cheek bones and the lines of his lips with his eyes, wishing he was doing it with his lips, when Andrew turned Neil’s face away.

“Did anyone ever tell you that you have a staring problem?” Andrew asked, his voice muffled from the sheets.

“I like looking at you,” Neil said unapologetically.

“Disgusting,” Andrew replied, but within seconds his hand found its place in the collar of Neil’s ratty t-shirt. He tugged on it. “You need to get rid of this.”

“Do you want me to do that right now or do you want to wait until Nicky and Kevin vacate the room?” Neil quipped.

“Smart mouth.” Andrew pulled the pillow over Neil’s face. “It’s too early for this.”

Neil took the moment to stretch out his legs before sitting up. The pillow Andrew used to half-heartedly smother Neil fell to his lap so Neil returned it to its spot on the bed. He stretched his back next, letting out a small grunt when it gave a few satisfying pops and cracks.

A hand on his hip made Neil pause. When he turned around, Andrew was squinting up at him. “We still have a couple more hours until we have to be up,” he said.

Neil took the offer for what it was and slid back under the sheets, closer to Andrew than before but still leaving several inches of space between them. Andrew’s hand trailed up Neil’s side, idly tracing patterns over his t-shirt. Neil couldn’t complain. It wasn’t often he and Andrew could have a lazy morning together.

Anxiety spread through Neil’s veins like a cold poison, sudden and unwelcome. His expression must have shuttered because Andrew withdrew his hand. “No, it’s okay,” Neil said.

When Andrew just stared at him, Neil swallowed the lump forming in his throat and explained, “I’m worried about the game tonight. I feel like my mind is spinning in constant circles, always going back to wondering what will happen if we don’t win.”

But Neil knew what would happen, and so did Andrew.

Andrew settled his hand on the nape of Neil’s neck. Neil leaned into the comforting and solid presence. “If something goes wrong, I am not going to let you go.”

“You can’t stop Ichirou from getting to me, Andrew,” Neil said. He glanced at Nicky when he let out a particularly loud snore, a reminder that he and Kevin were still in the room. When he looked back at Andrew, he saw the familiar stubborn jut of his jaw. “No matter what happens, you can’t follow me. I don’t want you to get hurt.”

“I will not let you just die.”

Neil’s shoulders slumped forward as much as they could when he was laying on his side. “I don’t want you to die, too. And I’m not going to run again. I can’t. Not anymore.”

Andrew said nothing to that. He stared Neil down with an intensity Neil would never flinch from. The hand Andrew had clasped around Neil’s neck squeezed. “I’m not going to lose you again,” he said with steel finality after minutes had ticked by.

A shuffling from the other side of the room broke them from their staring contest. Neil turned his head to see Kevin and Nicky in the process of waking. The intensity of the moment was gone when Kevin nearly shoved Nicky off the side of the bed and stole the blanket. When Kevin was soundly snoring again, Nicky got out of bed, grumbling, and turned to see Andrew and Neil both staring him.

Nicky hitched a thumb over his shoulder. “He is horrible to share a bed with. I don’t know how he ever gets laid.”

Nicky wandered out of the room, mumbling under his breath. Neil thought he heard Kevin’s name and something about a bucket of cold water. The creak of the mattress when it was pressed down told Neil that Andrew was getting out of bed. When Neil looked back at him, Andrew motioned to the bathroom door and said he was going to take a shower.

The rest of the hours leading up to the game were a blur. The Foxes went to a nearby gym and Neil spent most of the time on the treadmill to make up for skipping his morning run. After that, they went to get lunch at some café that Kevin said was good.

Since they had a couple hours to themselves before they had to load up the bus and head to the stadium, most of the Foxes returned to the motel. Matt spotted a park nearby so he and Nicky took some of the freshmen. When they’d gone, Neil went over to the girls’ room when Allison texted him to come over.

Allison was closest to the door when Neil walked in. She sat cross-legged on the vanity counter in front of the mirror. She was dressed in pajama shorts and an old t-shirt that still looked better than any of the ragged shirts Neil owned that Nicky and Andrew hadn’t gotten rid of. She didn’t look up when Neil entered, she was too focused on braiding her long hair in two French braids, but she acknowledged him with a nod.

“Hey, Neil,” Dan greeted from her spot on one of the beds. “Is Andrew behind you?”

“No. He and Renee are hanging out, I think,” Neil replied, sitting on the edge of the bed.

Dan threw her legs over Neil’s lap and frowned. “Are they sparring? I don’t want either one of them hurt before the game.”

“Renee told me they’re just going for coffee.” Allison rolled her eyes, still facing the mirror. She grimaced and undid one of the braids and started over again. “She said something about not spending enough time with him or whatever.”

A knock sounded at the door and Kevin poked his head in. With one hand still gripping the loose braid in her hair, Allison chucked a nail polish at Kevin’s head. Kevin ducked and narrowly avoided getting hit in the forehead.

“What the fuck, Day!” Allison screeched. “What if one of us was getting dressed?”

“I knocked.” Kevin’s scowl deepened. “Is Neil in here?”

Dan waved her hand at Neil as if presenting him on a silver platter. “He’s right here, your royal highness.”

Kevin rolled his eyes. “Stop being immature.”

Both Dan and Allison laughed and Neil swore he saw Kevin’s frown flicker upwards just a tiny bit. Dan motioned for Kevin to come in and Kevin closed the door behind him.

By the time Allison started painting her nails a pale blue, Dan had pulled up a rerun of the USC vs. Edgar Allen death match game from a couple weeks ago. The Trojans had won that game, eliminating the Ravens in semifinals and making history. Neil had watched that game live with Kevin, and when the final buzzer sounded Neil witnessed Kevin smile sincerely for the first time in a long time. If the Foxes won their game tonight, they’d play the Trojans in the championship game.

“That’s going to get ruined in the game, you know,” Dan said, tearing her gaze away from the screen after Jean Moreau checked one of the Raven strikers so hard, he sent them skidding across the court floor. Jean wasn’t even carded for that move. For an ex-Raven, he was playing fairly clean. Being with the Trojans for a year obviously had a positive impact on him.

Allison shrugged, already painting the same color on her toes. “I can paint yours, if you want. Then we’ll have matching trashy nails.”

When the rest of the Foxes returned to the motel and Allison’s nails were done drying, the Foxes packed up their things while Wymack and Abby went down to the lobby to check them out.

By the time they were all on the bus and heading for the Penn State Exy stadium, Neil felt jittery and wired with anxiety. Not even Andrew’s shoulder pressed into his could leach away any of his nerves. He stared out the window, watching the trees silhouetted across the dark sky fly past as he picked a stray thread on his jacket. After about ten minutes, Andrew was apparently done with Neil’s restlessness and flattened his hand against Neil’s leg to stop it from bouncing.

“Sorry,” Neil mumbled. He forced his hands and feet to be still. Andrew kept his hand on Neil’s thigh, even after he stopped moving.

Five minutes later, the stadium came into view and ten minutes after that, the Foxes were in the locker room dressing out in their gear and jerseys. No one really had anything to say, not even Jack who surprisingly kept his mouth shut for the ride there.

Neil thought he could already hear the crowd screaming in the stands, but it was hard to tell over the blood pounding in his ears. When Wymack announced that there was forty-five minutes until first serve and ushered them out of the locker room and into the outer court, Neil thought his heart would leap right out of his chest.

The crowd roared when they caught sight of the Foxes. Interrupting the sea of navy blue of the Nittany Lions, entire sections of the bleachers were orange where Palmetto’s fans came to support their Foxes. The Vixens were already riling up the crowd by throwing each other in the air and shouting cheers while Palmetto’s mascot ran up and down the rows. The thousands of people in the stands clapping and stomping and screaming an arrhythmic beat disrupted the desperate pounding in Neil’s chest.

In front of him, Kevin froze and Neil had to skid to a halt to prevent running into him. He flipped around and although Neil was right behind him, Kevin’s eyes frantically searched the crowd before they found Neil.

“What is it?” Neil shouted over the crowd.

“He’s here,” Kevin said, his face pale. “Neil, Ichirou is here.”

Neil’s stomach bottomed out as the world skid to a halt. He pushed past Kevin to see into the writhing crowd, looking for one face in thousands of others. Neil’s eyes caught on the black in the swarm of orange and blue, a few rows from the front. Ichirou sat with two men on either side of him, his face calm and impassive as he surveyed the court with apparent disinterest.

Swallowing a couple times to get the metallic taste of fear out of his mouth, Neil reasoned, “He’s just watching us play. It makes sense that he’d be here tonight. We can’t let him distract us from our game.”

Kevin nodded but he still jumped when the referees’ whistles signaled for the Foxes to begin their warm-ups. Neil pushed thoughts of Ichirou and the threat he brought with him to the back of his mind and started the slow jog around the outer court, easily taking the lead of the group with Dan. After they lapped the court twice, Dan ordered them to start on simple drills.

When the teams retreated back to their respective sides in the outer court, Neil reached up and clapped Kevin on the shoulder. Kevin grasped Neil’s gloved hand and squeezed it briefly. No matter what happened, no matter how scared Neil was, they were in this together.

“Alright, Foxes,” Wymack started, flipping through the papers on his clipboard without reading anything on them. “This is the last game before Championships. In order to move on, we need to score at least eight points.

“Neil, you and Robin are going to be playing first quarter. Aaron, Matt, you two better make sure no strikers get past you to score or I’m signing both of you up for a marathon. Renee will be in goal for most of first half to save your asses, just in case. Allison is going to be in there with you so I expect a strong start.” Wymack clapped his hands as the Foxes scrambled to put on helmets and gloves.

“The Nittany Lions won’t make it easy for you. You are going to have to fight for this, and fight for it hard. I don’t want to hear any excuses, I just want to see you play your best. I believe in you, and you should believe in yourselves.” With that, Wymack tossed his clipboard to the side and pushed up his sleeves, revealing the black flames tattooed on his arms. “I expect five points in the bag by half-time or you all are running so many laps next practice you won’t be able to feel your legs. Now, get your asses on the court.”

Neil shook out his arms and twisted his racquet in his hands as he eyed the other team. Wymack gave them the rundown of the starting line or Penn State earlier so Neil mostly knew what to expect, but the Nittany Lions still had twice the number of players than they did. Palmetto’s team was larger than it was last year, but they still had few players to cycle through. Penn State could burn through half their line-up and still have more fresh players than the Foxes to put on the court.

Robin clacked her stick against Neil’s as they took their places on the line and Neil nodded in appreciation. Palmetto had first serve, so Allison held the ball in her hand, ready to throw it in the air and send it down the court for Neil to catch. She caught his eye threw and nodded.

Taking a deep breath, Neil squeezed his eyes shut until he heard the referee’s whistle to start. Then he took off down the court like a bullet.

The game started off as rough as Wymack said it would. Within minutes, players were colliding with each other and the Plexiglas walls. Neil had the ball hugged between his chest and the net of his racquet as he took his allowed ten steps and swung, aiming for Robin’s waiting net. Although she was several inches taller than Neil, she was nearly just as fast and zig-zagged across the court. Just before her backliner marked checked her and sent her sprawling to the floor, she sent the ball back to Neil.

Between them, they were able to get the ball up the court. But before Neil could score, his mark slammed into him and the ball was dislodged from his net. The backliner caught it and sent it to one of the strikers. Neil cursed and chased after it before it could get too far away from him.

He was the fastest player in NCAA Exy, but he wasn’t fast enough to catch up to the striker before he took a shot on the goal and made it. Four minutes into the game, and Penn State scored the first point.

Neil didn’t have time to dwell on the score when Renee hit the ball back up the court. The rest of the team banged their fists against the Plexiglas and cheered them on. Neil leapt and caught the ball and rebounded it to Robin.

Within minutes, a fight broke out. Both Matt and a one of the tall Nittany Lion strikers earned themselves a yellow card. By the time the first quarter was over and Neil was subbed out for Jack, the score was 2-3, Penn State’s favor.

As soon as Neil slumped down on the bench beside Andrew, Abby swarmed him and shoved cups of water and Gatorade in his hands to drink. Neil waved her off after the third cup and leaned forward to catch his breath. He was already drenched in sweat and his side was throbbing from an errant elbow to his gut when his backliner mark checked him.

Neil wondered what Ichirou was thinking. He wondered if he saw Neil stumble and mess up a shot or if he saw him fight past the brutal backliners and score just out of the goalie’s reach. Neil’s breathing didn’t slow after five minutes sitting on the bench so he tore off his helmet and doubled over it in his lap. He had until fourth quarter to get it together. He couldn’t afford to have a breakdown right now.

Neil hadn’t realized Andrew was saying something to him until Andrew ripped his helmet out of his hands and dropped it to the floor. Andrew’s hand wrapped loosely around Neil’s neck as he brought Neil’s face close to his. When Neil was finally able to breathe, Andrew leaned in close and said, “Get it together, Abram. You do not have time for this.”

Neil nodded in agreement and took a deep breath. Behind Andrew, Neil could see Kevin glancing nervously at him. Neil raised his hand, pleased to see that it didn’t shake, and waved him off. Andrew squeezed once, just enough for Neil to feel it, and let go.

At half time, the score was 5-4, Penn State leading. The court cleared and Abby went from player to player, checking aches and growing bruises and handing each a cup of water. Wymack paced in front of them, tapping his fingers on the side of his arm as he barked orders to the Foxes scrambling around him. When the fifteen minutes of half-time was up, Kevin, Jack, Nicky, Andrew, Sheena, and Dan filed onto the court and took their places against Penn State’s fresh line-up.

If the first half was rough, third quarter was worse. About ten minutes in, Jack was thrown against the wall so hard he slid to the ground and stayed down for several seconds. He struggled to get up but ultimately raised his racquet for the game to be put on hold so he could be subbed out. Two refs passed him to Abby for her to fret over and Wymack sent out Robin in his place.

Energy coursed through Neil’s body. He could have gone out and played the rest of the second half instead of just waiting out on the bench. He should be out there, not here. Last year he played full games with Kevin, he was more than capable of playing the rest of the game. He wanted to call Robin back and take her place himself, but the door was already closed when Neil stood up from the bench. Aaron, who was close by, grabbed Neil’s arm and slammed him back down before Neil could even take a step towards the court doors. Neil shook him off, snarling, but Aaron only rolled his eyes and turned back to his discussion with Matt.

Third quarter ended and two more goals had gotten past Andrew. Considering how much he blocked, a lot more should have gotten through, but Andrew had always been amazing. Kevin and Robin scored two goals between them, putting the score at 7-6, with Penn State leading. Neil’s heart was in his throat.

Neil scrambled up and snatched his helmet and gloves from the bench when Wymack called his name to take Robin’s place. Every step he took sent his heart racing. His palms were sweating but Neil was still able to get a good grip on his racquet, which was the only thing that mattered. By the time the ball was swerved, Neil was already running for it.

Kevin caught the ball and took three steps toward goal before spinning around and sending the ball to Neil. Without hesitation, Neil jumped to meet it and snagged it in his net. He dodged his backliner mark and smacked it back to Kevin. They’d practiced this a million times, hundreds of hours spent on the court well into the night, perfecting the footwork and the angles until neither one of them could move anymore. Kevin caught the ball and flicked his arm so that it slammed into the wall and lit the goal up red before Penn State could even react.

Kevin raised his racquet in the air as the Foxes and the crowd around them screamed. Neil’s grin was fast and triumphant. The stadium around them seemed to shake the entire court. They were tied with Penn State now, and they only needed one more point to progress to finals. They hadn’t won yet, but Neil’s blood was pumping fast through his veins and they had the rest of the fourth quarter to get that point and pull into the lead.

The Penn State goalie served the ball and Neil didn’t waste time watching it fly through the air. He calculated the arc and shot after it, swerving past players in orange and blue on his way to the ball. He reached out to catch it, stretching his entire body forward on the tips of his toes like a bird poised to fly. He was so close, the ball just about to fall into the net when a flash of blue and white slammed into Neil and pinned him against the Plexiglass wall hard enough to knock all the air from his lungs. Neil’s head careened with the glass behind him with a resounding crack, sending a spasm through his body and rocking the ground beneath his feet.

The world tilted dangerously to the side as Neil slumped to the ground like a ragdoll, his racquet slipping from limp fingers to crash to the floor. Tires screeched against asphalt and lights flashed in Neil’s eyes. Someone, far away, was screaming, shrill and sharp in his ears. He could taste blood in his mouth, thick and coppery on his tongue. It felt like someone was squeezing Neil’s entire skull in their hands, making his head pound so hard all he could do was screw his eyes shut and curl into a ball to wait it out.

Neil blinked. He was on the floor of the court in Penn State’s stadium, hundreds of miles and thousands of minutes away from the scene of the car accident.

His vision cleared and Andrew’s face came into focus, hovering several inches in front of Neil’s. Behind the face guard, Neil could see the concern swimming in his hazel eyes, the wrinkle in his brow. Sound slammed into Neil like a freight train, rushing back to him all at once. He could hear the inquisitive rumble of the crowd and the echo from the announcers, replaying Neil’s crash with the backliner.

“Neil.” Andrew’s mouth was moving, but the words came slower. “Are you done?”

Neil shook his head, ignoring the bolt of that went through his skull and pushed himself up. “I’m okay. I can do this,” he said. His words came out intact and clear. It was a good sign that he wasn’t slurring his speech.

Andrew still looked unsure, but Neil’s vision was clear and other than a headache and a bruised shoulder, he was fine.

The people in the stands went fanatic when Neil stood and motioned for the game to continue. They were riled up and eager for the excitement of the game to go on. Andrew’s grip on Neil’s arm loosened as he made his way back to goal after he made sure Neil really was okay. But Neil stood still for a couple more seconds, staring out at the court and its players as the world moved around him.

This was his future, and he wasn’t going to give it up without a fight. Neil hoped Ichirou was watching, he hoped he saw the crash and Neil getting back to his feet. Neil wasn’t so easy to keep down. Eight years on the run made Neil a survivor, but two years with the Foxes made him a fighter.

Neil returned to his place beside Kevin and the game began again when the ball was served.

It was a frenzy, players checking and dodging past each other. Yellow and red cards were handed out like candy to players of both teams as the game grew increasingly more violent. Neil’s muscles and joints throbbed, his head worse of all, but neither he or Kevin gave an inch to the other team.

Andrew had shut down the goal, no matter how many shots the strikers tried to take, Andrew didn’t let a single one hit its mark. A thrill went through Neil as he raced across the court. They could do this. The Foxes could do this.

The timer was counting down. With two minutes left on the clock, the Foxes and the Nittany Lions were at a stalemate with seven points each. Both teams fought against each other, pushing past each other’s backliners and aiming for the goal only to get denied the delicious taste of victory.

A stitch was forming in Neil’s side and no matter how much Neil fought to resist the tug of fatigue, he was starting to slow down. Neil knew Kevin felt it too, when he glanced over and saw Kevin struggling for every breath when they lined up for Penn State to take a penalty shot. Neil grit his teeth. One more point. They just needed one more point.

The Penn State striker took a single step and swung, aiming for the top right corner of the goal. Andrew reacted instantly, deflecting the ball and batting it with enough force it flew all the way to the other side of the court. Kevin and Neil followed as one, a two-part creature sharing one brain, communicating through quick glances and small movements from their racquets.

Kevin caught the ball and swung around to Neil when a backliner blocked his path. Neil caught it with ease and doubled back when he saw his way to the goal was blocked as well. He passed it to Kevin but Kevin rebounded it off the wall back to Dan as he fought with his backliner. Dan tossed it in the air, her position on the court not much better than Kevin’s.

There was a space between Neil’s backliner mark and the Penn State dealer dogging his steps. Neil saw his opportunity when Kevin and Dan juggled the ball back and forth between each other to keep it away from Penn State. He ran through the gap of bodies and twisted around just in time to catch the ball Dan passed to him.

Time slowed down. The world narrowed and the only thing Neil could hear in the large stadium was his ragged breathing and his footsteps across the court. The thirty seconds left of the game counted down slowly, in time with his steady heartbeat. An arm interrupted Neil’s view of the goal but Neil ducked under it and dodged the other backliner waiting for him. Twenty seconds left on the clock, two more steps for Neil to take.

One step towards the goal. Neil shifted and aimed the ball to line up his shot. At the last second, Neil took his second and last step and pivoted on his right foot. He swung for the bottom corner of the goal and watched the ball leave his racquet.

It was out of Neil’s hands now. The goalie dove for it, but she was too late. Neil’s shot slammed into the corner of the goal, lighting up Neil’s world red as the buzzer reverberated through his body.

Before Neil could even catch his breath or before Penn State could snatch up the ball and take it down the court to try for another point, the second buzzer announced the end of the game. Kevin and Dan were at Neil’s side in an instant, yelling so loudly Neil’s ears rang with their voices. Down the court, Neil could see the rest of the Foxes cheering and celebrating. They won, 7-8. Eight points. The Foxes were going to finals for the second year in a row.

A slow grin spread across Neil’s face. Across the court, Andrew leaned across his racquet. The only sign he was affected at all was the heavy rise and fall of his chest. Dan looped her arm around Neil’s shoulders before his legs could give out and send him toppling to the floor again. Together they made their way to the rest of the teams lining up to shake each other’s hands.

The only thing Neil felt when the Foxes made their way off the court was the savage triumph swelling in his chest. Ichirou was an afterthought. Neil didn’t think he could be scared when victory was coursing through his veins. Matt and Sheena were assigned press duty while the rest of the Foxes made their way to the locker rooms. Neil was grateful, he didn’t think he had the breath for dealing with reporters.

Neil met up with Andrew in the locker room. He hadn’t quite managed to erase the grin on his face when Andrew rounded on him, but Andrew didn’t seem to mind.

“You closed down the goal,” Neil said, his grin only growing wider with awe. “That’s a lot of work for someone who doesn’t care about Exy.”

Andrew rolled his eyes. “Well, unfortunately I care about your dumbass. Now go shower before the smell sets in. I can barely stand you as it is.”

The steadying hand Andrew had around Neil’s wrist easily negated his words. Neil laughed and fetched his clothes. He waited for the rest of the team to finish before he made his way to the stall-less showers. Even after a win like that, Neil didn’t feel like stripping in front of the rest of the team.

After letting the hot water work the ache in his muscles, he turned off the shower and toweled the rest of the water off of his body so he could get dressed. When he left the showers, the first thing Neil saw Andrew. Alarm bells immediately went off in his head. The line of Andrew’s shoulders was tense and he held his body as if preparing for a fight. When Neil rounded the corner, he saw why.

Ichirou Moriyama stood in front of Neil, his guards flanking both his sides. They were all dressed in impeccable black suits and ties. They looked like they had finished an important business meeting more than they looked like they had just watched an Exy game. Looking at them, the only thing that gave away what a danger they presented were the guns resting at their hips. Neil raised his chin and met Ichirou’s unerring stare, refusing to back down.

Kevin’s face was strained from where he stood beside Andrew. When Neil entered the room, his eyes found Neil’s. Where Neil expected to find panic and desperation, he saw determination behind the fear.

“Wesninski,” Ichirou greeted. It sounded more like a threat than a pleasantry. In the corner of his eye, Andrew stiffened and clenched his fists while Kevin shot sharp glances between the two of them. Ichirou then looked to Kevin and Andrew and flicked his fingers dismissively. “You two may leave. I will speak to Nathaniel alone.”

Kevin looked confused before Ichirou’s words set in. His eyes widened. Kevin was free to go, but Neil was not. Andrew’s mouth tightened like he was about to argue but there was only one of him and four of Ichirou’s guards. Even with knives, Andrew didn’t stand a chance against armed guards. Neil met his eyes and gave a near imperceptible nod. Andrew stared at him for a long time before he dragged a lagging Kevin from the room.

Neil knew he should wait before Ichirou addressed him, but Neil’s blood was laced with fire. His father was the butcher, after all. Neil met Ichirou’s gaze head-on. “My Lord, if I may. My team played well tonight and will be advancing to finals in the coming weeks. I scored several of those points and even scored us the final goal. To dispose of me now would be a lost opportunity for winning finals a second year in a row.”

Ichirou inclined his head. His eyes glinted, and Neil knew he wasn’t pleased with him speaking out of turn. “Are you suggesting I extend the deadline? You are bargaining for a few more weeks of your life until I come again at the end of that game as well. You cannot keep pushing this back.”

“I’m not asking for you to extend the deadline. I’m asking for you to abolish it.” Neil paused and waited for Ichirou to motion for him to continue. “I have proved, time and again, that I am a valuable asset.”

“I am not happy with you, Wesninski. You still speak out of turn and plead for your dying case. I would save myself from so much trouble if I washed my hands of you completely,” Ichirou said, his voice never wavering. Neil swallowed.

“I am sorry, Lord Moriyama.” Neil bowed his head, still not taking his eyes off of the mob boss. “But happy or not, I will continue to make you money through my future career as a professional Exy player, if you’d let me. If you get rid of me now, you will not get the money I promised you.”

Ichirou was silent. Neil really hoped he was considering Neil’s words and not thinking about all the ways to kill him. Minutes seemed to pass, marked only by the loud thudding of Neil’s heart. Andrew was waiting outside for him, like he always would be. The Foxes were there as well, still drunk on their victory. Neil’s death would ruin more than just an Exy season.

He couldn’t die now, not after all of this, after all he survived. Neil had fought hard to get back to where he was before the car accident so many months ago. He didn’t want all of that to go to waste.

“Very well,” Ichirou finally conceded and Neil let out a small breath that was trapped in his lungs. “I suppose you can still be of use to me. But I expect you to keep your mouth more in check, next time we meet. And yes, there will be many next times. Now leave.”

Neil didn’t need to be told twice. He kept his footsteps even until he was out of the door and down the hall, away from Ichirou’s sight. He staggered with relief and squeezed his eyes shut as he leaned against the wall. When he opened them, Andrew was standing in front of him with his arms loose at his sides. Andrew was the only one in the long hallway. He must have sent Kevin ahead to the others.

Neil looked at him. He had all the time in the world to be with Andrew, now that Neil no longer had a death sentence. He felt the smile spreading across his face even before Andrew narrowed his eyes. “I’m going to be captain next year,” he said.

“Yes or no –”

“Yes.”

Neil answered Andrew’s question before he could even finish it. Andrew leaned in but Neil was already falling into him. He pressed Neil against the wall and gave him a bruising kiss that burned through his body like a wildfire. Neil thought it was the sweetest thing he had ever tasted.

They had to keep it brief, but Neil let himself drop his head against Andrew’s shoulder for a couple minutes as he laughed with giddy relief. Andrew’s fingers worked through his hair, sending the droplets of water still clinging to the strands dripping to the floor. Andrew lifted Neil’s head with a hand on his chin and leveled him an even stare. Neil twined his fingers with Andrew’s, still tangled in his hair. Neil didn’t believe in a god, but the kiss he placed on the corner of Andrew’s mouth was the closest he’d ever come to a prayer.

Andrew pulled away and leaned his forehead against Neil’s. Neil’s breathing was even, his heartbeat steady. He was alive, and he had the permission to continue to live. To play Exy. To love Andrew.

Neil grinned and pulled Andrew closer. “Let’s go home,” he whispered in the scant inches between them. Andrew lifted his head, his hazel eyes reminding Neil that he already had his home right in front of him.

“You did it, Abram.”

#tfc #aftg #the foxhole court #all for the game #neil josten #andrew minyard #andreil #she's finished!!!!!!#whew i might actually cry #wow #pause and restart #now we just need an epilogue #my writing #mine #finished fic #man that felt good to type

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