#solubivnus atfakoji

[bukitanukiart]

Solubivnus: a day of chaos

Today has been potentially the most eventful day of my life, so I'm going to hype it up as such.

To preface the story (and title), I live with 5 roommates, and we have a calendar in our kitchen for communal events, and written on today (May 25th) was the phrase "solubivnus atfakoji".

This has been here since the beginning of the month, and frankly, none of us know who wrote it, or what it's supposed to mean/actually say, so for the whole month, we've been hyping up today as a joke, even deciding to have a big dinner as "celebration" for solubivnus.

But starting about a week ago, we've been having issues in our house, mainly the fact that our water heater wasn't working, and any attempts to contact our landlord failed, so today we took our anxious asses over to their residence services to actually help us. Thankfully, they listened to our begging and sent over our saviour: Kyle. Kyle has saved us many times before, we adore this man, I would die for Kyle.  So over Kyle comes in record time and takes a look at the heater and was like “yeah, that’s weird” and calls over a plumber to take a closer look, so off Kyle goes, and about 20ish minutes later, the plumbers come by and just say “oh yeah, Your gas got shut off, call your gas company.” and the 5 of us that were home look at each other because, why is our gas off? we've payed the bill on time since we’ve moved in?  and then we remembered something very important.  remember how our hot water went out about a week ago? yeah, the day before, we had seen a man in our backyard with a jacket that read “Meter reader”. we didn't see him do anything, just the tail end of him being in our yard and going on his merry way. we thought it was weird as fuck, but he didn't do anything so we just ignored it.  except he did do something...

he turned off our gas and we didn't even notice.  so I call the stupid gas company, and say “yo, why is our gas off?” and the poor guy on the other side of the line is like “off? its not, your file says your fine, I can send someone over to check it out though. 45 Road st right?” and I pause. “no” I say “I live at 54 Road st” and there was another pause. “your file says 45″. I feel a sense of dread as I look at my account details. there it was. 45 Road st. “Oh god. have I been paying someone else’s gas bill?” and my man on the other side lets out a small “I think so...” so for almost a year, our dumb asses have been footing a random strangers bill. and you might be thinking, Buki, how the fuck did you not notice this? how come they didn't shut it off 3 months in? well my friend, I live in the north, where its illegal to shut off gas during the cold months as it supplies heating, and wouldn't you know it? our lease started 2 months before the cold months. and so I wait on hold, trying to get this all figured out and eventually get told “we can transfer all your payments to a new account for your correct address and hook you back up to gas, it’ll be done in... around 20 days.” and I'm like “what the fuck, I cannot go without hot water for another 20 days, is there anything you can do?” and then I get put on hold again. 

when I finally hear from this guy again, I'm told “okay yeah, we can hook you back up sometime between 6 - 8 pm tonight, you'll still have to wait for someone to call you in 20 days for the account changes though” and tbh, that's cool man, thats fine, I just cant go a total of a whole month without hot water.  and once I hang up the waiting game is played again. by the time we hear from this guy, we we’re ready to sit down for our solubivnus dinner.  it was 5 min to 8 when we hear a knock, and we think “oh god, its finally over” as this guy hooks our gas back up and sets up our water heater and leaves.  we have a nice dinner, hanging out until 10pm It’s finally over.

except it’s not. we go downstairs and what do we see? our water heater spewing water all over our basement floor. and we panic naturally. so here we are, filling buckets with the coming onslaught of water as I panic call the emergency line for our rental company, and let me tell you that was the longest phone call of my life. finally they say they’ll send someone over, I say “great, please hurry” and not even 10 minutes later our saviour returns. Kyle.  my man Kyle comes to the rescue and turns the water off, looking at the mess to try and figure out what's wrong before calling us another plumber, these ones coming in 45 min. and when they come, what are we told? “yeah, we’ll have to replace the whole thing tomorrow.”  and that's where we are now. 

what an eventful solubivnus.