#sofie's delayed writings

[pinkpunkdynamite]

FEBUWHUMP DAY 4: "WHERE ARE YOU?"

Febuwhump challenge by @spidersonangst English is not my first language, so please do tell me about my mistakes. This is a slightly different re-writing of my modern!au McKirk drabble in russian (because let's face it, i'm lazy and don't feel like translating everything i've ever written).

Another call goes straight to a voice mail. "Jim, where the fuck are you?" Bones presses an end call button, throwing the phone on his bed. Damn it! "Hey, Jim, it's me again," he doesn't even know which call this is already, "I've seen the news. Call me back as soon as possible." Leo sits on the bed, trying to calm down his trembling hands and muster up his unsteady breath. The noise of another breaking news is resonating in an almost empty apartment. "Goddammit, Jim..." Bones breathes out a huff, nervously ruffling his hair up. He's been trying to get ahold of Kirk for the last two hours, since the reports of a plane disappearing off radars came on the news. Jim was supposed to fly to NASA HQ for another conference while Bones had a  12 hour shift at the hospital. He remembers kissing his boyfriend  goodbye and apologizing for not going with him to the airport. Jim gave him a short laugh and "Just be there when I'll come back." Leo is bloody worried. He already called Jim's mother, Winona, who hasn't heard from Jim since his last call of two days ago, and even Spock, who they had an after-engagement party with. They just gave him a simple "Don't worry yet." speech and said their goodbyes. He's worried so much that his heart is jumping out of the ribcage and he finds it hard to breath. Tears are pooling in his eyes trying to escape, but Leo is fighting them, trying to keep himself as sane as he can in case Jim has missed his flight and on his way home. He turns attention to the TV on the wall and listens. "The remains of a crashed plane has been found...." He loses his temper, jumping up and screaming out of fear and anger, throwing the remote into the screen, breaking it. "Fucking christ!" he sobs, his knees giving out under him, sending him to the floor. He's laying on the floor, weeping for the dark hole in his heart and barely graces his engagement ring with fingertips. "Damn it, Jim..."

[sofiepoindexter]

Writing prompt #4

"I don't want to sacrifice myself anymore."

[penguintransporter]

Every You, Every Me (a Leon Goretzka story) Chapter I

New story! This is only the first chapter, and honestly it’s only intro to what’s coming. I hope you like it, and let me know what you think of it - that’s the way to make me continue writing because believe it or not, it takes me a week to write a chapter. Anyway, after Héctor and the rollercoaster that WTGCL was, this should be....equally stressful 😂 Read, enjoy, like and reblog, and let me know what you think - that’s why anons are for, and if you don’t want me to publish your ask, just let me know, and I will keep the message to myself. Tags are at the bottom, and if you want to be tagged, just let me know! Love you all!

Sofie shifted nervously in her seat, looking around the bright-lit and retro-decorated barbershop she randomly picked out in the sea of hairdressers across the city of Munich earlier that morning. The decision wasn’t a sprue-of-a-moment kind of thing, but she knew that if she kept delaying it, she would have changed her mind – as she did many times before.

The hair-salon was bathed in the pungent smell of various hair-products mixed with a faint scent of sandalwood and something citrusy – the fragrance wafting from the array of candles, strategically placed and lit around the salon. In front of her, there was a large, round mirror, attached to the brick-exposed wall, and all the brushes and other hair-cutting utensils rested neatly in round container, along with sleek-looking hair-clippers – charged and ready to be used.

Sofie breathed out a soft and slow breath, shifted in her seat again, and then met the eye of the young barber who had been watching her reflection in the mirror with, what felt like, impatient look on his face. 

No wonder – he had asked her about the chop she wanted some time ago, and she fell silent – gathering the strength while her brain raced for some courage to say it out loud.

“I was thinking of going short,” she finally answered, trying to sound cool and determined, but despite all the efforts and time she had to formulate her answer, she sounded all but that. 

Meek and cowardly – if she would describe it herself.

The young man, who upon her arrival at the salon, introduced himself as Arvin, nodded once before lifting some of Sofie’s shoulder-length hair, inspecting it closely with a knowing face expression. He was tall and broad-shouldered, and the way his V-neck clung to his torso, Sofie had no doubts that he spent a lot of his free time at the gym.

“Did you do this recently?” he asked dully, sliding his thumb and index finger along the length of Sofie’s hair, and she nodded slowly, glancing at him apprehensively.

She wasn’t lying. Her last visit to the hairdresser was not more than two months ago when she decided to get a Pinterest-worthy balayage in one of the fanciest hair-salons in the city. The entire ordeal took more than two hours of her feeling extremely uncomfortable among riches and famous of Munich, and when the girl in glittery trousers and seventies-inspired high-heeled boots told her the final price, Sofie almost shed a tear in front of everyone.

“Yes, less than two months ago,” she muttered, realising that she fell silent yet again. It was a habit of hers - disconnecting and immersing herself in her own thoughts.  

“Okay,” Arvin nodded to himself, “and, how short do you want it?”

Sofie watched him drop the hair he was holding, making it fall limply over her shoulder before making eye-contact with her in the mirror once again. She hesitated for a moment, giving herself an opportunity to take a deep breath.

Am I really doing this?

Yes.

“Short,” she finally said it, looking down at her lap and the wrinkles on the plastic cover that made her look like a some sort of a tent with a human head, and under which she kept sweating profusely ever since she was seated in the leather chair, ten minutes ago. “I want it very short, you know? As in, shaved head short.”

Arvin’s serious and seemingly uninterested face changed into a curious one in matter of seconds, and as she watched him, Sofie could notice the corners of his lips turning upwards ever so slightly. Unnecessarily, she made a quick side-note that he actually looked so much younger when he wasn’t sporting a frown on his face.

“We can go as short as you want, but I wouldn’t do a clean shave since I don’t know what shape your head is, if you know what I mean,” he started – grin never leaving his face as he grabbed the plastic comb and pair of scissors from the bag that hung around his waist, “and...excuse me for being intrusive, but just out of curiosity, who broke your heart?”

Sofie smiled warmly, clasping her hands on her lap underneath the plastic cover, wringing her fingers together. “Let’s say, I broke my own heart,” she softly whispered, “I was chasing something that was out of my reach, and along the way, I lost myself.”

“Something or someone?” Arvin asked as he brushed the hair away from her face before parting it in the middle, and meeting her eye in the mirror.

“Does it matter?” Sofie smirked back at him, making her hairdresser chuckle.

“No, I guess it doesn’t,” he started as he detangled some of the locks at the back of her head, “shaving off hair can be liberating in many ways. To some people it is a choice of lifestyle, for others it feels like a weird way to shed ones old self.”

Sofie went to say something, but quickly fell silent as she let his words wrap around her head. The way he said it, and the tone of his voice - it felt as if he wasn’t really aware of how right he was – when it came to her life and decisions she made, both good and bad; more bad than good.

For a second, she let her eyes drop to her lap again, feeling the anxiety fill her body. “Yes, I agree,” she muttered, looking up, “this is my way of starting anew.”

Arvin finished brushing away her hair and then placed both of his hands on the backrest of the chair that she was sitting on, leaning forward slightly. “I recommend we start with a bit longer cut, and then we can gradually go shorter if you feel comfortable doing so,” he advised, giving her a sympathetic smile, and Sofie felt the knot in her stomach twist. “Okay, shall we start? Are you ready?” Arvin asked, lifting his scissors and twisting some of her hair between his fingers.

There was a moment of silence between the two of them, despite the buzzing of the barbershop and all the loud noises of hairdryers and clippers, and in that tiny fragment of a second, Sofie felt a slight change of the heart evading her body, but as soon as it appeared, the feeling dispersed, and she took a deep breath. 

She had to start from the beginning, and getting ready of the hairstyle was just the first step – something that had to be done.

“Re—ready,” she breathed out, squinting her eyes at herself in the mirror, and before she could blink, Arvin made the first chop – a lock of her hair falling on the floor, causing the customers who witnessed the moment, to clap enthusiastically.

Thirty minutes later, a double espresso macchiato, some tears in the corner of her eyes, shaky breaths, and a half of the Kinder Bueno she kindly accepted from the tattooed girl who sat next to her, it was over. Arvin set the clippers down on the wheeled tray next to him before brushing her neck with a large bristle brush. With a swift move, he removed the plastic cover and stepped aside, letting her look at herself without being overwhelmed.

Like hypontised, Sofie stayed put and seated, unsure of what to think of her new look. 

Her head felt lighter, but also colder, and when she rose from the chair, bringing her face closer to the mirror, she almost couldn’t recognise herself. With her legs shaking, Sofie got up before glancing at her feet and all the hair that was scattered on the floor around her sneakers – her heartbeat accelerating.

“I hope you didn’t change your mind,” Arvin commented from where he stood on the side, watching her with an amused look on his face.

Sofie slowly shook her head, unable to voice her thoughts as she glanced at him before looking back at the mirror. In a red and white striped t-shirt, tucked lazily in a pair of loose, grey trousers, the girl that stared back at Sofie was all but not the same person she convinced herself that she was for the past two years. This girl was edgier, braver, more confident, but also more vulnerable and exposed – her blue eyes appearing bigger and brighter.

This girl was who she actually was.

This girl was the person she was supposed to be.

Nervously, she ran both of her hands across the top of her head and her fresh cut, down her nape before intertwining her fingers behind her neck – a slow, but content smile spreading across her face.

**

With a slight push, Sofie opened the doors of her apartment and walked in – ears filling with the silence of the emptiness of her flat. She had been living alone since she moved to Munich, but her best friend owned a key, and wasn’t a stranger to random uninvited and unplanned visits, and as much as Sofie loved her, she wanted to be alone. 

Quickly, she discarded her shoes before making her way towards the kitchen – her socks gliding across the parquet floor, collecting tiny particles of dust on the soles. With a glance at the clock that hung above the small dining table, Sofie sat down the bread that she bought on her way home, along with her tote-bag and set of keys with way too many keyrings and figurines attached to it.

She heaved down on one of the miss-matched chairs before bringing her bag and the bread closer to her, leaning back into her seat  which was one of the less successful purchases from the nearby flohmarkt. The chairs were pretty, but also wobbly and uncomfortable, yet cheap, and anyway, she rarely used them – eating most of her meals while watching TV was a habit she couldn’t shake off no matter how hard she tried.

Sofie ran a hand over her face as she took out her phone, looking at the screen, only to sigh softly at the name written underneath the missed-call notification. He had called her while she was waiting in the line to buy bread at the nearby bakery, but she was too scared to answer.

Why? She couldn’t say.

She let her mind wander, breaking a part of the bread before stuffing it into her mouth, chewing on it absent-mindedly – her eyes never leaving the screen of her phone that had a single screen crack in the corner of it which usually made it difficult for her to see the time. Sofie moved her hand towards her hair to tuck it behind her ears, only realise that there was almost no hair left on her head before shaking her head with a small smile, and running her fingers across the tiny hairs on the nape of her neck.

She then brushed the crumbs away from her chest before getting up and unlocking her phone yet again, quickly navigating to the missed calls – her finger hovering over his name and a tiny emoji of a  goat next to it. 

She took a deep breath, pressed the call back button before she could change her mind, and pressed the device to her ear. 

Nervously, Sofie propped herself up on her toes as she looked through the tiny window that overlooked the inner courtyard of her building, listening to the familiar tone of ongoing call before hearing a tiny click that made her heart beat just a tiny bit faster.

“Leon, sorry, I couldn’t answer before...”

**

tags: 

@footballerimaginess​, @littlebitofbluelittlebitofcoffee​, @jordanspetkovics​, @disneydaddyevans

[fresafresitawrites]

paloma’s cards and water

my latest creative writing assignment! adding onto the next series of my vignettes! involving my oc andrew as the main boi. u can find them all here  this one is a lil long but my prof really liked it so im happy w it. rest is under the read more! id be so happy if anyone reads this slkajf inspired by tarot reading, my grandma, and that one chapter in the house on mango street w the tarot reader 

I was on the first floor of my building getting the mail when I heard my downstairs neighbor sweeping her entrance mat.

“Buenos d��as, m’hijito.” Her voice was like the strum of a guitar.

“Buenas, Señora Paloma.” I replied. I gave her a quick glance as I skimmed a letter about my academic probation from last semester.

She set the broom aside and looked up at me.

“Ah, so formal now that you’re older, and taller too. You’re always getting taller and taller.” I’m only five foot six, five foot eight when anyone asks. “I haven’t seen you too much lately.”

“Oh, disculpe.” I crammed the envelopes into my messenger bag. Most of them were junk anyway, like dollar store advertisements or auto companies offering me a car loan. “I’ve just had a lot on my mind, a lot going on with school and work and everything.” I closed the mailbox unit.

“Ay, perdón, Señor Ibarra,” she teased. Somewhere after I turned eighteen, I went from calling her Mama Lola to using formalities. “Do you have some time, actually? I need help with something, si puedes.”

I checked my phone. I had work in an hour. “Sí sí sí, yeah, whatdya need?” I cracked my knuckles. Usually, she just wanted me to move furniture or get something from the top shelf of her kitchen cabinets, like the blender she used during the summer to make watermelon juice. Her oldest son also bought her an iPad for Christmas three years ago when he visited from Buffalo, and I’ve memorized the passcode after troubleshooting it for her so many times.

Paloma waved me inside her one-bedroom apartment, two floors directly underneath my family’s. We lived in an old house with four floors that probably used to belong to one rich family in the nineteenth century but was now broken up into several apartments. Paloma’s door was the first one on the ground floor across from the staircase. Her apartment always smelled like dryer sheets, and the television was always on some Spanish talk show, and water was always boiling over the kitchen stove because she didn’t trust the pipes. The yellow walls were adorned with Mexican folk paintings, plastic floral garlands, and family photos attached with Scotch tape. In every corner there were figurines of Catholic saints.

A few years ago, I asked Paloma to watch Sofi and Eli for me. I had tickets to see The Strokes at Madison Square Garden and only that morning did I double check the date of the concert. My mom was at a student’s piano recital, and I agreed a week earlier to watch the girls that night.

I was carrying Eli in one arm and held Sofi’s hand with the other outside Paloma’s door. The girls were four at the time, so I just gave them each twenty bucks to never say anything.

“Hmm!” Paloma lifted her eyebrows and crossed her arms. “And you think your momma won’t find out?”

I thought about it. “Well, don’t tell her.”

Paloma laughed, squinting her dark eyes like a fox.

Thankfully, Ma’s train got delayed on the way home that night.

In Paloma’s kitchen, two Devil’s Ivy plants sat in the sink with their vines trailing over the edge, hesitating to touch the tile floor. On the left was the glass door to her own small patio, where a few stray cats lay across the concrete. Paloma pointed to her wooden breakfast table, leaving her broom aside, so I pulled out a chair.

She sat down across from me, laying a purple and gold silk cloth between us and placed two tea lights on each side.

“Oh, is this what you wanted me for?” I sat up, surprised. She tied her long, gray-brown hair into a bun.

Paloma has never tried to use her cards on me before. I was never interested in these things. Hemera was the one who came to visit often after her break-up during freshman year with this film studies major, Vladimir, who played the accordion and was originally from Portland. Hemera and Paloma would lean over the tarot cards, speaking low, like candleflames. I usually sat on the couch and watched Looney Tunes, since Boomerang was one of the only channels on Paloma’s television other than the news or Telemundo.

“How’s your friend?” Paloma asked as if she read my mind. “Is she your girlfriend yet? Or has she found someone?” She pulled out the deck of cards from her apron pocket and shuffled them.

            “Oh, no, she’s okay. She’s doing okay.” Hemera told me two weeks ago she was “focusing on herself” which meant she deleted Tinder and would reactivate it within the next week. “And nah, she’s like a sister to me. That’d be weird.”

            Paloma watched me. “You cold?”

            “What? No…” Well, now that she mentioned it… ‘Actually, yeah, kind of, maybe.” I zipped up my wool sweater. Was there a breeze?

            “Good.” She spread the cards out with her delicate hands. “That means the spirits are here.”

            “Uh, okay. Sure, Paloma. They are.” I tried not to sound too sarcastic.

            I closed my eyes and hovered my left hand over the fanned-out cards, mimicking how Hemera used to do it. I tapped three random cards and Paloma flipped them over.

            She read them out loud. “El ermitaño, la rueda de la fortuna, y la muetre.”

            The late February sun casted a soft glow over the kitchen like a dream.

            “Your past, present, and future cards.” Paloma’s tone shifted into something softer, as if her words descended from the clouds. “Ah, look at you. Always keeping to yourself, always, always. Like the old man here on the card… alone on the mountain, holding a lantern trying to illuminate his path.”

            I tilted my head.

            “Right now, you’re in a critical position. It’s a marvelous position to be in! See all the arrows on the wheel going in all directions? They can lead you anywhere. You just steer the wheel like the helm of a sailboat and go wherever the wind takes you. How exciting!”

             I leaned forward. I examined the card that depicted what looked like a large, gold coin covered in strange symbols and surrounded by hybrid animals and angel figures.

            “And here, look, don’t be afraid of this last one. Everyone’s always afraid of this card, but don’t take it too literal. This card means transformation, it means upheaval, it means purging, it means endings.

            I picked up the card, fixated on the small boy kneeling before the skeleton-knight riding a white horse. I put the card back down.

            “This sounds… vague.” I leaned back in my chair, half skeptical and half on edge from her reading, but I didn’t want her to know the last part. “I thought you’d tell me something terrible would happen, or something like who I’m going to marry or whatever. Not that I would believe it, but I’m just wondering why you wanted me here right now.”

            Paloma smiled and crossed her arms. She’d been expecting this reaction. “It’s not like that. It’s not a math test, like in school. There are no right or wrong answers here. I know you don’t like that. Frustrating, no?”

            “Yeah, a little.”

            “Half of the work is you. It’s like looking at art or reading poetry. You’re participating. You’re drawing your own conclusions.” She placed the deck back into her pocket. “You have to marinate on the words, m’hijo. Everything will reveal itself.”

            I took a deep breath, swung my bag over my shoulder, and checked my phone.

            I had work in five minutes.    

[eucat]

SPOILERS for Forbrydelsen S1 (the Danish version) below

WHY would this show gaslight me into thinking Sarah Lund and Jan Meyer’s relationship is no big deal!? Søren Malling even said in an interview that he didn’t want to be killed off because he and Sofie Gråbøl had such good chemistry, the writers had to admit he had a point and delayed his death so his character could have more time with Lund. When I finished season one and logged on to tumblr dot com I couldn’t BELIEVE there weren’t hundreds of you shipping these two! Don’t get me wrong I think the acting and writing of their dynamic up to Meyer’s death is absolutely perfect but then after he dies it’s just soooo painful that things almost continue as if nothing happened. Which maybe was the point for the Lund character but still, it felt so pointlessly bleak and heartless not to see her break up a little more over the whole thing!?! At first I thought they had the David Tennant/Olivia Coleman thing going on as seen in Broadchurch, you know, the friendship chemistry that is borderline romantic but is never cheapened into some predictable sexy storyline even though there’s CRAZY intimacy. And then I kept watching and I was like...you know everyone goes on and on about how the English became obsessed with Nordic noir because of this show and the craze for Danish television swept through the UK etc., what if Mofftiss literally watched this show as they were writing the first season of Sherlock and got Johnlock ideas from it (maybe even unconsciously). I’m literally not kidding. Like I am saying with my full chest Lund and Meyer are dead ringers for Sherlock and John parallels. I know love when I see it! When Meyer gives that little sigh and then a second later follows Lund to accompany her on one of her unsanctioned little benders...when he literally chooses to believe, trust, and help her every time, even at the expense of having a “normal” life and being with his own family...when he KILLS FOR HER and saves her life??? Tell me that whole scene isn’t almost exactly the same, shot for shot, as the ending of A Study in Pink. I cannot be the only person who ships this, even as a “friendship”!!!

[frangipanidownunder]

Fiction/non-fiction books that informed your life philosophies or made you see things in a new way?

What a great question! I’ve had to think about this, so apologies for the delay. I’d like to think that many of the books I read change my perspective on things, simply by showing me life through other people’s eyes. Great characters do that.

But here are a few titles that have stayed with me and perhaps influenced my outlook more than others:

‘Look me in the Eye’ by John Elder Robison. I read this when our second son had been diagnosed with autism. What fascinated me most was the way Robison lost his mathematical genius when he gained more social skills. I used it as a way to understand more about the possibilities of living well with ASD, rather than trying to shape the person with ASD into a convenient mould.

‘Bird by Bird’ by Anne Lamott gave me a perspective on how to approach writing without spiralling into sheer panic. It’s a witty and wise read.

‘The Dictionary of Lost Words’ by Pip Williams is still freshly imprinted in my mind, having only just finished it. It will stay with me for a long time. It offers a gently feminist look at the world of words that apply to women and their lives and how they shape people, society and history yet didn’t appear in the official dictionary. 

‘The Eye of the Sheep’ by Sofie Laguna is a haunting novel told from the viewpoint of a young boy on the autism spectrum and it showed me how vulnerable children can be when there is a reliance on only one parent/carer. It can still scare me today that I am the only one who can truly understand my son (although this is not true and he is nearly an adult now and very resourceful) but still it was a sobering read.

‘The Idea of Perfection’ by Kate Grenville is a gentle exploration of the isolating and difficult life of two socially awkward, older people. It is heartwarming and unexpected and a wonderful insight into two less than perfect characters and reading it fills you with empathy and sadness and hope.

I’m sure there are more, as I said, all great characters affect your perspective in ways that can be profound or subtle.

Thanks for the ask, lovely.

[andrea-lyn]

@vlamis tagged me and since my wine tour got delayed, why not?

1. Are you named after anyone? I am not. Also fun story, I am actually Amanda, which I tend to shorten to Manda. My pen-name is actually my first two OCs (cough, Mary Sues) I wrote when I was younger, but Andrea is actually the name I was meant to have, but since my mother’s family is Italian, they couldn’t name me that because I was a girl and not a boy

2. When was the last time you cried? Yesterday? It wasn’t much, but I got teary-eyed at some of the scenery on the drive from Mt Cook to Queenstown

3. Do you have kids? No and no and no. I really don’t want kids and am happy to spoil my niece, but man do I not want kids.

4. Do you use sarcasm a lot? Yes. I grew up thinking if I could make people laugh with deadpan comments and sarcasm, they would not hate me or see flaws about me, so I am a little overly negatively sarcastic at times

5. What’s the first thing you notice about people? Usually, their manners? Which is odd to say, but generally how they treat people by their tone or their behaviour

6. What’s your eye color? Brown

7. Scary movie or happy ending? Happy ending! I don’t mind a scary movie, but I don’t really scare too easily, so I mostly just sit there going ‘oh, here’s where the scare will be’

8. Any special talents? I’m a very good volleyball player, thanks to many years of training when I was younger, so these days I play competitive co-ed, reverses, and women’s tournaments for cash prizes or other prizes. for instance, my last tournament, I won a set of dominoes. worst prize ever. I guess I also write? idk

9. Where were you born? in a little town outside toronto

10. What are your hobbies? writing, travelling, reading, playing vball

11. Do you have any pets? yes, my sweet fur-baby sofie, who is a golden-retriever. she is my time-share dog because I co-own her with my parents and get her when they travel

12. What sports do you play/have you played? see above, but vball is the main one. I’m a setter for co-ed and I play middle or right side with womens/reverses. when I was younger, I also played tennis and badminton, but have dabbled in just about every sport (swimming, soccer, basketball, etc.etc.)

13. How tall are you? 5'10

14. Favorite subject in school? faves? history (of any sort), physics, writing classes, drama (for a very long time, I wanted to be an actress/writer)

15. Dream job? I want to be the person who tests out hotels, activities, and restaurants for a tour and then assembles the tour and puts it together for people. Basically, I want a job that lets me travel on my own and plan things, two of my most favourite things (I’m a planner, everything must be planned, I need lists and details)

I’m sure I’ll get duplicates here, but tagging @hazel-athena @swingsetindecember, @alexmanes, @ubiestcaelum, @littlecountrymouse @annethecaptain, @insidious-intent @michalienguerin and since I am running out of time now and need to get going, anyone else who wants to!

[poprocksromance]

15 & 29 !

15.  five most influential books over your lifetime.

Where the Sidewalk Ends. I was delayed in reading. I’m a bit fuzzy on the details, but I’m pretty sure I didn’t read at school because I though the books they gave us were dumb. But Shel Silverstein’s poetry - I ate it up. This book I am particularly fond of and would read it to death back when I didn’t read anything else. My favorite poem was Boa Constrictor.

Kira Kira. I read this in fifth grade. It was about a girl whose sister who helped bring their family together through hard times was now dying. It just sticks with me; I remember how utterly sad I was at the ending. Plus, it is about sisters and I’m close to my own.

The Devil in the White City. Formative because it taught me that non fiction could be truly compelling when told well.

Unwind (series). I love all things Neal Shusterman, but I love Unwind the most because of the way it made me think and I aspire to write a story and characters as well. Plus, there is a scene in the first book that haunts me.

Harry Potter (series). Like many in my generation, I grew up on these books. They were one of my first ‘big kid’ books I read (when I started reading, book four was already out). I went to the midnight book releases and the midnight movie showings with my family and I think of these moments very fondly. Plus, I cannot forget that Harry Potter (Marauders Era, of course), was my first fandom.

29. three songs that you connect with right now.

A popular question! How the Tide Rushes In by Ann Dudley and co. (so peaceful and fun to sing), Energia by Sofi Tukker (a great dancing song) and LIfe Happens by Ardyn (heh my life is interesting atm)

[kyojuuros]

hi there! you seem to be really involved with the snk fandom and i was wondering if you be willing to recommend some snk creators - a short description of what each blogger creates would be great too! thank you and have a great day!

Hello! Sorry for the delayed reply. ^^’’

Sure, I’m happy to recommend a few content creators that I enjoy who are currently active! Just be warned that many of these bloggers have many different kinds of favorite characters/character groups and ships and that some are multi-fandom as well! 

Graphics:

@stohessdistrict, @omeinfreund, @eren-s, @ohackerman, @ravenliz, @dirtylevi, @tatakaeeren, @uttsukushi, @ackersoul, @keith-al, @aurieackerman, @fudayk, @nakamatoo, @shitpost-no-kyojin

Graphics and Art:

@sookashira

Graphics and Writing:

@kuchenackerman

Art:

@kaschy, @nelldya, @alinajames, @lolakasa, @dreamxxdream, @drinkyourfuckingmilk, @arteis, @sulkingmoon, @thebritishteapot, @alemanriq, @nikkiyan, @ermioney, @titankin, @nkyart, @omy-chan01, @lampurpleart, @sofi-yomi, @ask-secretrivamika, @gloomikasa, @cang-ye-ji, @peachymess-art, @bev-nap, @noaryr, @jaxxg, @peachylevi, @9-69, @shira-aot, @asatomii, @louwie-luna, @taramoline, @well–i-dont–know, @synstruckart, @lindowyn, @roxe-kun, @roxoah, @anitora24

Art and Writing:

@morebeesthanyoucouldimagine, @kiokushitaka, @kenken-chan, @lunarcrystals (writing sideblog is @lunarfanfics)

Writing (please note I’m pretty garbage at keeping up with fanfic nowadays and there’s so many authors it’s hard to remember them all, but these are a few to bounce off of - I always recommend checking tags for fanfics as there are a lot!):

@perksofbeingawaifu, @die-forellex, @erwin-smith, @sugarplum-senpai, @fluffymusketeer, @kaekiro, @sayaanara, @pickalilywrites, @annieleonhardt

This is honestly a pretty short list, but I’d be digging for hours trying to find everyone I can include if I tried to get everyone XD So hopefully this is a good start to bounce off from and you can get a feel of who does what around here. :P

[pinkpunkdynamite]

FEBUWHUMP DAY 1: TRAPPED

Febuwhump challenge by @spidersonangst English is not my first language, so please do tell me about my mistakes. Ann Halstead is a main character from my story "The Disappearance" that I abandoned at 3rd chapter, this is just bits and pieces that can't leave my head.

"Damn it", Ann angrily whispered, sitting down on a squeaky old bed. "Fucking hell." Somehow, swearing did help to calm down her nerves. Like it always did.

Breathe in. Hold it for a second. Breathe out.

That didn't help. Nothing did, actually. Screaming, shouting, whispering, banging on the insides of the shipping container she ended up in. Nothing helped to set her free. She was rid of her phone right after her captor knocked her out, gently lowering her on the ground. Her gun, too. And the badge. "Fucking badge", Ann swore out loud. She's in a very big trouble. Outside the container, that is. She let some asshole to steal her service gun, which already meant a bunch of problems. And the badge... That's a fucking combo. Time doesn't feel like it's going too fast or too slow, it feels like everything is just frozen. Ann doesn't really know how much time it has been.

An hour? Two? A day? She doesn't even know how long she was unconscious, for Christ's sake! "And the reason", she finally said out loud. "Who the fuck is stupid enough?" She stood up, hearing something scrape the metal wall of the container. A short, barely noticeable scrape. A scratch. Like someone is out there, listening. She tried her best to get off bed as silent as she could, the bed giving out a low squeak - low enough to pass it for some wind if you didn't know about the woman inside. Ann tiptoed on her bare feet in the direction of the sound, barely touching metal with her fingertips, trying not to lean too hard so it wouldn't give her out and started to listen. Nothing. With a shaky breath, she took a step back, wiping away the sweat off her forehead with a sleeve of grey jacket. The darkness made all sounds louder and so Ann didn't move, awaiting for another scratch. Another couple of minutes passed by and Ann heard a commotion on the other side of container, quickly stepping to that place. It was like someone was out there. Not one person, rustling with their clothed bodies and feet, maybe two, she noted. They were quiet, trying to keep themselves unnoticed. Suddenly, the lock jingled, giving a good loud rumble to the whole place, and the door opened. Ann closed her eyes of the sudden brightness for a second, trying to see something in light after being in the dark for so long, but before she opened her teary eyes, the door closed. She jumped to it, banging on the metal and screaming another set of curses. "Fuck you!" was her final note when she turned back into the darkness of an almost empty place. She was angry and tired and unbelievably disappointed at herself. Huffing out another puff of breath, she finally leaned off the door and slowly started to walk in the direction of her bed. Slowly, because the first time she got off the bed and tried to find it later, she hit her knees on the metal sticks so hard that it's still hurts a little. Slowly, step by step, reaching one hand out just in case, she started her path. One step. Two steps. She stumbled onto something on her third, so she carefully lowered down, while her heart rate jumped high in the sky. Ann shakily gulped, suddenly blind and deaf to the world out of fear while being high alerted to anything and everything at the same time. She touched the thing. The thing gasped. A human. They dropped someone else with her. "Hey," she whispered, mouth dry and voice cracking, "Are you alright?" "Annie?" the familiar hoarse voice called back, breathing hard.

[sofiepoindexter]

Dialogue prompt #2

"How about you rot in hell, darling?"

[ashlynbradshaw-blog]

6/28/18 Yesterday was such a special day (I’m writing this the next morning)! Sofi and I woke up at 4:15 to finish packing up our things and to call an Uber to the airport 35 Minutes away. We were so excited to leave that airbnb and to finally go to Italy! The plane ride was seriously 35 Minutes it was so short! And it only had a row of 2 seats and 1 seat. By far the smallest plane I’ve ever been on. We finally got to the bologna train station, which is way more confusing than the ones in France. This adorable little boy came up to us speaking Italian and was very interested in the almonds I was eating. I gave him one of my candy sour straws and the kid was ecstatic! He said “good” in Italian with a thumbs up and it melted our hearts. I’m not even doing this story justice, it was the sweetest thing. Then, 5 Minutes before our train was supposed to arrive, the screen finally showed which gate we were in. However, unlike in France, all the trains were delayed anywhere from 5-35 Minutes. Not realizing our train was probably delayed too (didn’t say it on the screen when we looked) we hopped on the first train we saw in gate 19. However we knew it was the wrong train when it left at 11:53, not 11:55. We immediately became stressed out, annoyed we’d have to spend more money on new tickets, and grew even hungrier and more tired. Our phones weren’t working because the train was going through tunnels, so we had no idea which direction we were even going. Finally, out of a tunnel and 20 Minutes later my phone finally loaded our location, and I couldn’t believe what I saw. We were in Florence! Our wrong train ended up being another train to Florence! We got there about 30 minutes earlier than the train we were supposed to get on, and we somehow avoided the ticket checker who was making her way down our coach. After dropping our things off at the hotel, we walked around and ate food at this place called Trattoria Zà Zà. The menu was huge and in English! We ordered a pizza and fried mushrooms to share and both were beyond amazing. It was a great first meal. Since we woke up at 4:15, we decided to head back and take a hour long nap so we could walk around at night, and thank god for that nap! My roommate for USC next year saw my instagram story and couldn’t believe we were in Florence! I had assumed she had already left, since I knew she’d been there for a while. We made a plan to meet up for dinner, gelato, and to go out later that night. Sofi and I walked around a little bit more before meeting Alexis and her two friends Claire and Kelly. They were waiting at our hotel when we arrived and Alexis and I immediately hugged. The five of us walked to an Italian restaurant and sat at a large table and got to know each other. Turns out we all knew a lot of the same people. They all live in Sacramento and went to an all girls school the same size as sofi and I’s. We ordered a bottle of rosé to share and our own dishes. Then we stopped at our hotel to so sofi could change, then a gelato shop and then to their apartments. They are on a trip with 14 girls from their school, but not on a official School trip. At their place we started drinking, playing “never have I ever”, and telling each other stories from high school. I seriously can’t believe my luck, Alexis is the coolest girl ever I’m so excited to be roommates. We are so similar in every aspect and we like a lot of the same things. We met some of the other girls on their trip, and everyone is just so nice. It’s funny, it’s literally xavier (my high school) girls, just norcal edition. A big group of us left to go to an american bar and it was seriously so much fun. We were there for an hour or so, left to go back to the apartment for a bit, then went back to the bar. We were all dancing together to the music (finally something other than techno lol), and meeting new people from around the world. Finally at about 2 something in the morning, we all decided to go home for the night. Sofi and I said our goodbyes and headed home. I won’t see Alexis again until August, which is less than 50 days away now! Sofi and I walked 5 Minutes back home, luckily our loves were so close! We went to bed immediately so we could wake up in time for breakfast at our hotel.

[5hfanfiction]

Snapchat Streaks

Camila was starting to worry. Why wasn’t Lauren replying? She was opening everything Camila sent her. And this was very important! It was the fruit of two years and a half work. And it could all go down the drain in three hours if Lauren didn’t reply!

Even if it was for fun, Snapchat also needed consistency. You had to send snaps everyday or you would lose your streaks with your friends. Friends! They were important too. The app made you remember them at least once a day and send them at least a funny picture of you or what you were doing.

And Camila was more important than that! After all Lauren and her weren’t just friends. No, they were girlfriends. And that put Camila on top, she was more important than anything and anyone else. So why wasn’t Lauren sending her a snap?!

After staring at the seemingly laughing at her hourglass for a few more moments, Camila reached the conclusion it was time for a call. Soon she was holding her phone to her ear, listening to the sound it made whilecalling Lauren.

“Hey babe.” The green-eyed finally picked up. “What’s up?”

“Oh, I’ll tell you what’s up. Why aren’t you answering me on Snapchat? We’ll lose our streak in a few hours.” Camila said slightly annoyed.

“Sorry, Camz. I’m busy with the girls right now.” Lauren answered sheepishly. The Cuban girl could just picture her - looking forward with bored face, shrugging her shoulders even though she knew Camila couldn’t see her. “You know, rehearsing for our concerts and all.”

“Then why are you on your phone, opening every photo and video I send you?” The brown-eyed girl huffed.

“We have breaks from time to time. The fans won’t be happy if we die of exhaustion.” Lauren chuckled quietly. Camila rolled her eyes but still smiled. Yeah, she knew how much the girls worked to make their Harmonizers happy.

“Okay, okay. Just send something on Snapchat, photo or whatever you want. Or we’ll lose our streak and I’ll kill you.” Camila tried to sound angry but failed miserably. Then she got another idea, making her voice go lower and more suggestive. “You’re rehearsing right now, huh? You know, you can send me a photo of you in this big mirrors on the walls. Like, posing or slightly leaning on the bar next to the mirror. All sweaty with tousled hair. Just like when we’re in bed and I’m…”

“Sorry Camz, breaks over, I have to head back. I’ll send you a snap soon, I promise.” And just like that Lauren ended the call in the middle of Camila’s idea for a (very sexy) photo. The brown-eyed stared at her phone for a few moments before huffing angrily and tossing it aside.

That was going to be a long afternoon. She didn’t know what to do, radio interviews and promoting were over for today and she had till tomorrow to rest. But Camila wasn’t tired, she just wanted to talk with her girlfriend, or better - actually spend time with her. And they weren’t even in the same state. So Camila just plopped face first on her bed in the yet another hotel room and yelled into her pillow.

~~~

Snapchat has been there for quite some time now. But Camila finally managed to get Lauren to send her photos there daily just over two years ago. The younger girl knew her girlfriend wasn’t big on social media. But she also knew her girlfriend loved taking pictures of anything she saw or liked. And that was her main argument when she was trying to persuade Lauren to use the app more often.

And while Camila send goofy photos of herself almost always, Lauren send pictures of beautiful flowers or nice scenery from her hotel room or a beach she went to. Or when they were spending time together Camila often received snaps of herself. When she asked Lauren about them, the green-eyed would say that she looked beautiful in this light, or that her eyes were shining really bright, or that the background just asked for a nice picture. But Camila always knew, Lauren was just always looking at her, admiring her.

(And once, when she got to Lauren’s phone when it was unlocked, Camila saw all photos of herself from Snapchat saved on it. Just another proof. Not that she needed it but… yeah.)

In time, little by little, Lauren started sending goofy pictures of herself or the girls, using different filters or just doing something funny. Then, one night, when the girls had all gone to their homes for some holiday, Camila received a… more compromising photo of Lauren. And she received it in the middle of a family dinner. Her parents weren’t very happy when she nearly jumped out of her chair from the surprise, hitting the table in the process, making everything on it tremble.

Needless to say Lauren wasn’t laughing for long when Camila visited her house with some stupid excuse for in front of their parents. Oh no, Lauren was trying (and failing) to keep quiet that night.

Since then the two girls exchanged all kinds of photos and videos on the app. Yeah, sometimes the distance was getting to them and the snaps they sent and received were only for their eyes. But other times it was just normal photos or Camila trying to make jokes with the filters and stickers. And it had been going on for so long.

But now, thanks to Lauren, it could all come to an end. There were less than two hours now. At this point she could just send anything, from a fuzzy picture to just the floor or ceiling, or just black screen. Anything!

Camila was seriously starting to panic. Maybe she should call her girlfriend again? No, better not disrupt FIfth Harmony’s rehearsal. So the brown-eyed girl decided to just spam Lauren’s phone with text messages. Since she had nothing better to do, Camila started writing whole essays about how her day had passed, what she has done recently, how bored she was right now, how she wished her girlfriend was there with her. Of course the two girls talked on the phone every day but Camila didn’t think Lauren would mind hearing, or more like reading about it again. At least the younger girl wasted a few minutes typing on her phone.

Suddenly a notification from Snapchat popped at the top of her phone screen. Camila’s eyes wided as she sat up quickly. But unfortunately the photo that she had received was from her sister Sofi. Not that it was bad that her sister was sending her photos, oh no. Camila loved her sister and cherished every photo she received from her. After all she didn’t see her much lately. So social media, phone calls and news from their mother were the only ways to keep in touch and catch up. And the brown-eyed girl had recently managed to get her sister into the app too with the argument that they could send funny pictures to one another there.

So Camila was happy she got a snap from her sister and immediately sent her one back. But then she saw the sand clock next to Lauren’s name and her mood plumed down again. She sent one snap to the green-eyed, looking sad at the camera, pouting, she then added a few sad emojis and tears, just for a good measure.

A few seconds later came another snap from Sofi, this time a video. The two girls wasted fifteen minutes fooling around before Camila called her sister to talk with her properly.

~~~

Less than half an hour now. It was time for drastic measures. Camila dialed Dinah’s number.

“Hey, Chancho! What’s up?” Came the Polynesian’s voice after two rings.

“Depends if you’re inside or outside. Either the ceiling or the sky.” The brown-eyed said. This time though, her joke lacked the girl’s normally cheery and fun voice.

“No, Mila, you’re not funny. Stop trying.” Dinah said back. Camila was sure she was rolling her eyes.

“Lauren always laughs.” The Cuban proudly stated while smirking.

“That’s only because she’s whipped for you, girl. I don’t see anyone else laughing. Ever.” Dinah sassed back.

“Only because you stupid people don’t understand good humor.” But before Dinah could say something, Camila continued. “Anyway, speaking of Lauren, where is she? What is she doing?”

Dinah huffed. “She’s your girlfriend, you should know the answers to these questions.”

“When I called her earlier she said you were rehearsing but I don’t know about now. Are you still busy?” Camila asked while chewing on her lip.

There was silence for a moment. Dinah delayed her answer. “Oh yeah. Right. We were rehearsing earlier.” She technically repeated Camila’s words.

“I know, DJ. That’s what I said.” Now it was the brown-eyed’s turn to let out a sigh.

“With that attitude I won’t tell you anything, young lady.” Dinah suddenly sounded angry but Camila knew she was joking around.

“Please, Dinah! I need to know. It’s very important!” Camila really sounded desperate.

“What happened? Someone’s between life and death?” Dinah asked curious.

“Something like it…” The brown-eyed mumbled.

Now Dinah was worried.“What’s wrong, Chancho?”

“Lauren isn’t replying to my snaps on Snapchat. We’re going to lose our streak.” Camila nearly whined.

There was silence coming from the other end of the conversation again. Then a bomb went off. “What?! Are you serious right now? That’s your important thing?! Oh my God, Camila!” Then the anger in Dinah’s voice was gone and she started laughing, clutching her stomach with her free hand.

“It is serious, Dinah!” Camila yelled into her phone. “This is two years worth of daily dedication. Come on!”

The brown-eyed could still hear her best friend giggling. But at least the younger girl had calmed down. “Okay, okay. Um… We finished rehearsing nearly an hour ago. And… Oh yeah, and as soon as she was free, Lauren yelled she had something to do and ran out. Dunno where she went. Sorry, Mila.” Dinah said with weird, emotionless voice. Then she added out of nowhere. “Normani is calling me. I’ll go now. Bye, Chancho.”

Camila stood frozen, confused, for a few seconds before responding. “Uh, yeah, of course, go. Tell Mani and Ally I say hi. Bye, Cheechee.” And just like that the call was over.

Something weird was going on.

Well, whatever it was it wasn’t more important than Lauren and Camila’s Snapchat streak. Which was over now. When the brown-eyed opened the app to check if she had miraculously missed a notification from Lauren, she saw it. The hourglass was finally gone. But so were the fire emoji and the number that showed how many days the streak had survived. It had all ended, they had run out of time.

Camila didn’t know whether to feel angry or sad. She wanted to cry, this was something big to her, even if some might think of it as childish game. But she also wanted to smack Lauren. Hard. Her girlfriend knew how important this was to the brown-eyed, she knew she had to keep it up. Was it so hard to send one photo? It didn’t even need to be something specific, she could send anything just to keep the streak going!

Camila lied down on her hotel bed again. She didn’t have anything to distract herself now. She was alone. Her mother had gone home for a while and Roger was busy arranging more interviews and shows. So the brown-eyed couldn’t talk with them right now. Camila knew she was being stupid. She’d been in this position before. She could just watch tv or listen to music. Or play on her guitar and write. But she wasn’t in the mood. The Cuban girl just wanted to talk with someone, spend time like a normal human being, talk about topics people her age talked about. Not only scheduled interviews with the same old, boring questions. But most of all, right now, Camila wanted Lauren…

The brown-eyed went under her covers, not thinking about changing her clothes. She curled into a ball and silently cried until exhaustion overtook her.

~~~

Camila woke up with a jolt. Something had woken her up. But what?

The girl looked around confused. She found her phone and checked it for notifications. Nothing. And it was on silent anyway. So what was it?

Then she heard it. Knocking at her hotel room door.

Camila didn’t remember that she cried before she fell asleep so she didn’t think of washing her face. She just assumed that her hair was messy and maybe she had drool around her mouth. Whatever, the only possible person that could be at her door had seen her like that million times. After all, Roger had seen her in her best and worse times, the latter including waking up in the morning.

But there was another person who had seen Camila in the morning and she was standing at the girl’s hotel door. As soon as she opened the entrance to her room, Camila stood frozen in surprise. There was Lauren, smiling brightly, holding bag filled with junk food. But the green-eyed’s face soon frowned.

“Camz, what’s wrong?” She stepped into the room, closer to her girlfriend and inspected her face. Then she pulled back in shock and horror. “Have you been crying?” She asked worriedly.

Camila was still just standing there, staring at her girlfriend. Was she still dreaming? “What? Uh…” The brown-eyed wiped around her mouth with her sleeve. Then suddenly she released who was in front of her straightened up, trying to fix her hair and clothes.

Lauren chuckled but still looked worried. She grabbed at Camila’s wandering hands. “Leave it, Camz. You’re beautiful as always.” She complimented with a small smile but her eyebrows were still scrunched up. “What happened? Why were you sad?” She tried asking again.

“Oh…” Camila looked down guiltily, remembering the earlier events. “It was nothing.” She mumbled quietly.

“It’s not nothing if it’s making you sad, Camz. It’s very important. Tell me.” Lauren took one of Camila’s hands and let them to the bed in the middle of the room, where they sat down. Then Lauren’s eyes widened. “Shit! Snapchat!” And the green-eyed proceeded to quickly put the bag of chips and chocolates on the floor and scramble to get her phone out of her pocket. When she opened the yellow app her mouth formed an ‘O’. Now it was her turn to look guiltily at Camila. “Sorry, Camz. I thought I had more time. I just wanted to surprise you. I know how important this is to you. Um… isn’t there a way to get it back? Like… I don’t know… Sorry, Camz.” Lauren finally stopped fumbling with her phone, locking it and hanging down her head. “I hurried to get here. You know, our schedules are busy and we can’t spend much time together. So after we finished earlier I basically broke a few driving rules to get to the airport on time. And then yelled a bit at the taxi driver to drive faster to the hotel. I was planning to send you a snap of the hotel or the air port or something. I just forgot…” She suddenly stopped rambling.

Lauren rarely stopped talking, especially is she was passionate about something. And she was definitely passionate about anything and everything concerning her Camila. But that same Camila was also the only person who knew how to shut up the green-eyed.

With just one simple kiss.

Lauren immediately shutted up, melting into the kiss. Then, when the girls pulled apart, Lauren heard Camila’s quiet giggle.

“It’s alright, Lolo. It’s all fine now.” Camila said with a little smile.

“Really? Because… Can’t we, like, call the Snapchat company and ask them to get the streak back?” Lauren asked, running her hand through her hair.

Camila laughed properly this time. Lauren loved that sound, it was her favourite thing in the world. The brown-eyed just shook her head and threw her arms around her girlfriend’s neck, pulling her closer.

“It’s alright, Lolo. You’re here, that’s all I want right now. And maybe the junk food.” Camila jumped away from her girlfriend, launching at the bag of food.

“Of course.” Lauren shook her head. “Do you want to 'Netflix and chill’?” Sheasked, wiggling her eyebrows. Then she laughed at her own antics.

“If you mean actually eat and watch 'Friends’ then yes.” Camila poked her tongue at the green-eyed.

“No, Camz.” Lauren whined. “Can’t we watch 'Orange is the new Black’? Or rewatch 'Game of Thrones’, the new season begins soon.” She tried using her puppy eyes. But so did Camila. Lauren rolled her eyes. “Alright, alright, you win.” The green-eyed kissed her girlfriend’s temple. “Come cuddle.”

And so the two girls lied on Camila’s bed, cuddling and kissing from time to time. Of course, after the brown-eyed went to the bathroom to wash her face and fix her appearance. Even if Lauren didn’t mind if her girlfriend looked like a homeless person, Camila always tried to look better for her. Then the ‘Netflix and chill’ began.

“Wait, do the others know you’re here?” Camila suddenly asked.

“Yep, I told the girls. And Roger knows too, I asked him if you’re busy.” Lauren nuzzled the brown-eyed’s neck.

“The girls know? That’s why Dinah was behaving weirdly when I called her.” Camila said with a thinking expression.

“What, you called her to ask where was I?” Lauren giggled.

“Oh shut up.” Camila slapped her girlfriend lightly. “I was freaking out here.” Then she added quietly. “Wanted to talk with someone, with you. But couldn’t find you. I felt lonely.”

“Camz…” Lauren hugged her girlfriend closer, tighter. “Well, I’m all yours for two days, even if you have interviews. Whenever you’re free, you’ll be stuck with me.” She kissed Camila’s cheek.

“No complaints from me, Lolo.” The brown-eyed kissed her girlfriend softly, smiling warmly when they pulled away, her eyes shining.

Camila really was feeling better now, really good actually. Lauren always helped her, even with only being in the same room.

And the junk food helped too. Lauren always knew that the way to Camila’s heart was through her stomach.

~~~~~

A/N: Happy belated birthday to Dinah and Lauren  <3 ^-^

You can also find more stories from me here: http://my.w.tt/UiNb/YHofKJPklE

[eveofsin-blog]

♡ child

Send me ♡ + a word, and I’ll write a headcanon.

Having a baby for Estella would have been a huge risk. The ritual and process of birthing a vampire infant is extremely draining and requires a tremendous amount of internal and physical strength to endure. Thus, Estella’s status as a fledgling of Valente would have placed her at an immediate disadvantage due to the weaker natural state of her body and likely would have left her bed-ridden for a large portion of the pregnancy. Thus, Estella only has a single child that serves as heir to the Venetian coven, her daughter Sofie. Sofie is extremely precious to the coven, not only due to being the sole heir, but because Estella delayed producing a child for centuries which aroused great unrest in a large portion of advisers and other rulers. As a result, the baby from the moment she was born was bestowed the head of Valente’s guards to serve as her bodyguard and would not be seen apart from Estella or Valente for a very high portion of her early years. It is likely other coven rulers would not be permitted access to Venice until the baby was between six months to a year old simply due to the fragile nature of the entire situation. Estella took to motherhood like a duck to water however, thoroughly delighted in spending hours in her daughter’s company and marvelling over how beautiful her little creation was. Yet, once fully recovered from the birth, Estella did not let her daughter’s presence hinder her work and was straight back into council meetings with the baby swaddled to her chest. Anyone who complained at the infant’s presence was dealt with swiftly and with zero tolerance, thus, visiting rulers soon learnt not to challenge Estella on matters concerning her child. 

[ultralifehackerguru-blog]

New Post has been published on http://www.lifehacker.guru/what-you-should-know-if-you-need-to-delay-your-student-loan-payments/

What You Should Know If You Need to Delay Your Student Loan Payments

If you’re struggling with a medical emergency, unemployment or other financial crisis, making your student loan payments can be impossible. Rather than fall behind, you can opt to put your payments on hold through student loan deferment or forbearance.

This post originally appeared on Credit.com.

Deferment is an option that lets you postpone both your principal and interest payments. If you qualify, you can pause payments for up to three years. Forbearance is more temporary—you can postpone or reduce your monthly payments for up to 12 months.

However, delaying your payments through deferment or forbearance can have serious financial repercussions. Depending on the type of loans you have, your loan balance can continue to grow due to interest and other fees.

Choosing Deferment or Forbearance

Below, find out how your loan type affects deferment and forbearance, and what alternatives you may have.

Deferring Federal Loans

With certain federal loans, you don’t have to worry about interest payments if you enter deferment.

If you have federal Perkins loans, Direct subsidized loans or subsidized Stafford loans, the government will cover the interest that accrues on your loans while your loans are in deferment. With your interest taken care of while you get back on your feet, you will have less to pay back in interest.

If you have unsubsidized federal loans or PLUS loans, the government will not pay for the interest that accrues during deferment. If you defer your loans, they will continue to gain interest, possibly causing your balance to balloon and costing you thousands. Not to mention your debt-to-income ratio will get worse, making it more difficult to qualify for new credit such as a mortgage or car loan.

Before entering deferment, use a student loan deferment calculator to find out how much interest will accrue on your student loans if you postpone your payments.

Federal Loans and Forbearance

Unlike deferment, your federal loans will continue to accrue interest in forbearance, regardless of the loan type. Because interest continues to build, entering forbearance can be costly, but it’s still better than missing payments and defaulting on your loans.

Is Deferment or Forbearance Available on Private Loans?

Technically, deferment and forbearance are federal loan benefits. Not all private loan servicers offer similar options—but some do. For example, SoFi offers deferment for students who are going back to school. And if you’re facing a financial difficulty, you may be able to enter forbearance for up to a year.

If you’re experiencing financial hardship, it’s worth asking your servicer if deferment or forbearance is an option. Just keep in mind that entering deferment or forbearance with private loans can be more expensive than federal loans. There are often fees you have to pay, and interest will accrue while you postpone your payments.

Alternatives to Deferment or Forbearance

If you want to avoid pausing your student loan payments completely, there are other ways to manage payments when they’re too high.

Income-Driven Repayment Plans

If you have federal student loans, you may be eligible for an income-driven repayment (IDR) plan. There are four IDR plans available today: income-based repayment (IBR), income-contingent repayment (ICR), Pay As You Earn (PAYE), and Revised Pay As You Earn (REPAYE).

Under each plan, the basics are about the same: The federal government extends your repayment term 20 to 25 years and caps your monthly payment at a percentage of your discretionary income. At the end of the term, your remaining balance (if any) is discharged. You still have to pay income taxes on the forgiven amount, however.

Enrolling in an IDR plan can drastically reduce your payments and give your budget more breathing room. Depending on your income and family situation, you may qualify for a payment as low as $0 per month.

Refinancing

Unfortunately, if you have private loans, your options are more limited. But one effective way to reduce your monthly payments is to refinance your debt. By refinancing, you take out a new loan that pays off your old private loans. Your new loan will have completely new terms, including—ideally—a lower interest rate.

Refinancing private loans can help lower your payments and help you pay less in interest over time. It’s a smart way to save money while giving yourself more room in your budget. Be sure to keep in mind that if you refinance federal student loans with a private lender, however, you forfeit federal protections such as IDR and deferment/forbearance eligibility.

Deciding What to Do in a Hardship

Student loan forbearance and deferment are useful options when you experience a financial hardship. If you’re facing an emergency and can’t keep up with your payments, deferment or forbearance can give you a much-needed break while you get back on your feet.

While entering deferment or forbearance is a much wiser option than defaulting on your debt, there are still consequences. Make sure you understand the financial impact of postponing your payments, as putting them off can add thousands to your student loan balance. And in the case of private loans, postponing may not be an option at all.

If you’re struggling to keep up with your loans, the most important thing is to be proactive and talk directly with your servicer to find out what options are available to you.

Want to Pause Your Student Loan Payments? Here’s What You Need to Know | Credit.com

Kat Tretina is a contributor to Student Loan Hero who writes about student loan repayment, side hustles, and other personal finance topics. Her work has appeared in publications like the Huffington Post, Money Magazine, Business Insider, and more. See below for her most recent articles.

Recommended Stories

What to Do When You Can’t Afford to Pay Your Student Loans

The Complete Guide to Refinancing Your Student Loans

PSA: Don’t Forget to Deduct Your Student Loan Interest

©

[pinkpunkdynamite]

FEBUWHUMP DAY 3: TAKEN

Febuwhump challenge by @spidersonangst

English is not my first language, so please do tell me about my mistakes.

Ann Halstead and Mike Llewelyn are main characters from my story "The Disappearance" that I abandoned at 3rd chapter, this is just bits and pieces that can't leave my head. This one's from Mike's POV.  (i also missed day 2 because i really had no idea what to do with that one, and that's the reason why this one is much bigger than the first one)

"So, what was it?" I ask, drowning the first shot. Ann questioningly stares back at me, playing with the shot glass. "What made you a cop?"

"Serious stuff, just like everyone else," she smirks, standing up, "I'll go get the next round".

I watch her walking to the bar, ordering some drinks she's into and getting a big tray for it. Ann is new at our precinct. Been here for the last six months and the only thing I know about her is that she's a hard nut to crack. Hardworking, loyal, lawful, haven't messed up a single case we've been signed up for. I don't actually think that the "hardworking" word relates to her all that much. Take the hardworking person, multiply by ten times, and then you'll get Ann Halstead. She's at work before sunrise, sometimes not even leaving the precinct. And I know that something is bothering her. Something makes her stay with all these missing persons cases all nights long. The lost ones, the closed ones, the cold cases. She's digging them up and down until she's falling asleep on the table.

"Whatcha thinking about?" she smiles, setting up a tray of twelve shots on the table. "Tequila."

I sigh, having been hoping for something simpler, when she notices my not so happy face.

"I've been thinking about getting absinthe, you know?"

I roll my eyes, and that makes her laugh.

"You want a reason, you get to drink." She points at the tray. "I ain't gonna talk until I have at least three of it."

I nod, taking my buzzing phone out of pocket, checking the caller ID - Amber, my fiancée. I press the green button and there she is, with the sweetest voice I've ever heard.

"Hey, are you at the bar yet?"

"Yeah, trying to get a word out of Halstead. Is everything alright?"

Ann is shoving two fingers in her mouth, faking being sick. I just squint at her in return.

"Tell her I said hi," Amber continues, "Just checking up on you. Forgot about your "loving fence" plan." She's laughing now.

"I'll get home when I'll finish with the weirdo," a small laugh escapes both Ann's and Amber's mouths, "Love you."

"Don't drink too much, love you too."

I'm putting the phone back in the pocket while shaking my head.

"You're a fucking kid, Halstead."

"I just finished my round," her speech is slightly slurred, "Your turn now."

Damn it. The girl sure knows how to make someone hate her. I empty the first three too fast for my liking, and stop for a second to take a couple of french fries.

"Pussy." Ann drops.

"Ain't, bitch." I drown the last three, not liking the fire pit in my mouth and stare at my partner. "So?"

She sobers up a little by my question, sitting up straighter than before and rolling the sleeves of her grey jacket to her elbows. I notice a couple of scars and a tattoo.

"I had a sister. Back when I was a kid, you know?" She nods mostly to herself, playing with the glass again and not looking at me. It's a hard thing to talk about it. "Emily." She shows the tattoo closer to her right elbow - two anatomically right hearts joined at the beginning, which somehow reminds me of lungs, with "Emily" written in child's cursive under them. It's in color and quite pretty.

"I was eight, she was twelve, we were just playing in the garden," she's shaking and tries not to cry, breathing loudly. "I don't even know what the hell happened."

I'm silent, trying not to interrupt her with a bunch of questions. She takes a deep breath, clanking with her teeth, and breathes out.

"I don't remember what happened. We were playing in the garden, and some assholes," she starts to get angry, "just came up behind us. Dad was.... Dad was at the work, dad was always at work, trying to get a promotion, and mom was busy doing something in the kitchen. I don't really know what she was doing." She blinks tears out of her eyes, wiping at her nose. "They took her first, pulling the cloth to her face, and then they came up to me... I didn't even run. I was so fucking scared. I just froze. Sometimes I think what would have had happened if I wasn't frozen. Would my scream save her? Save us?"

I catch her shaking hand with mine, moving closer to Ann. I consider giving her a hug, but all I can muster is a simple "I'm sorry." and "It's not your fault."

"I should have just screamed." She's fully crying now, ugly sobs leaving her shaking body. "I could have done something."

I'm speechless. Ann is tightly holding my hand like her whole life is depending on it. There's nothing else I can do much, so I stand up and take the tray with me. She gives a silent nod, tracing the name on her skin with her fingertips.

"Is your girlfriend alright?" asks the bartender, pouring another twelve shots.

"She's my partner," I show him the badge under my jacket, "Just clearing up some stuff."

"Kay."

"Here ya go," I set up the tray in front of Ann. "You can have it."

"Suck my ass, Mike. We gotta share." She cleaned herself up while I was busy, and now looks quite decent aside from the runny nose and the red brimmings of her eyes.

We do the shots fast and silent - I don't really want to mess with her already messed up mind. And I don't even want to imagine what it feels like to see your sister for the last time in your life. What it feels like to torture yourself for twenty goddamn years after it. Twenty fucking years. I can't even explain the range of emotions I feel at the moment.

"So," Ann sits up straight, playing with her knuckles, "To answer your question, I just want to find my sister. I really, really do."

"What happened back then?"

"The police didn't do shit. That's why I'm here."

"Shit..." I puff out a breath I didn't know I was holding.

"They didn't even listened to me. I was there with her, you know? I remember the dark grey walls of an abandoned factory, the voices, the color of the eyes of those assholes, the names of children who were there... They didn't care."

...Fuck.