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jobean12-blog · 6 months ago

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Can't Help Falling

Pairing: Marcus Acacius x female!princess!reader

Word Count: 1,748

Summary: The more time you spend with the General, the more you fall in love.

Author's Note: I love (and hate for them) the idea that they have to be sneaky all the time and the library is a place of escape for them both so I thought having something a little extra naughty but also sweet would work. The poem I used in this story can be found HERE. You can read more about Catallus if you like. The library I'm referencing is the Ulpian Library and you can find info on it HERE and HERE. I'm pretty sure my timelines are all wonky but we can just pretend it all works out bc yay fanfic! 😁

Warnings: it's soft and sweet, semi public sex, fingering, oral (male rec), a lovely poem and a pretty library.

Marcus Acacius Masterlist

Pedro Pascal Character Masterlist

With silent footsteps you hurry across the stones, passing the Colosseum as it towers above you and blots out the brightest rays of the setting sun. The streets of the city are still very much alive with crowds but as you get nearer to the Forum of Trajan their voices start to fade and the warm breeze carries only the sounds of singing birds.

The Ulpia library is the same as you remember with long columns lining the courtyard and natural light filtering through every open space. There are people walking slowly along the walkways, books in hand and completely oblivious to your presence.

Even now, though you’ve spent such time together and watched him train and fight, it still feels like the breath rushes out of you when you see him. He stands taller than everyone around him, and as his dark eyes scan the courtyard, you take the time to enjoy him.

His tunic drapes across his broad shoulders, showing off his arms and legs and the ornamental stripes show off his status as General. He wears nothing on his head today and his curls blow freely in the breeze, giving him a slightly more relaxed look that makes you smile.

He turns and finds you then, standing and staring until you drop your chin under the intensity of his gaze. When you look up again, he smiles and discreetly crooks a finger at you, beckoning.

As you draw closer, he whispers, “you were staring Princess.”

“And you were not?” you shoot back, enjoying how his eyes sparkle with mischief.

Footsteps approach and you grow quiet, feigning interest in the architecture around you. A man passes by and greets the General before his eyes fall on you.

You’re recognizable even under your cloaked disguise so you quickly turn away and play shy.

It seems to appease the man and he walks off with his book.

“I have not visited this place in too long,” you tell Marcus.

With a quick look around, he gently presses his palm to your lower back and leads you deeper into the library.

“I figured as much,” he answers.

When you enter the main library room the smell of parchment and dust assaults your senses, and you breathe in deeply.

Marcus smiles and takes your hand, leading you to one of the niches where hidden inside there is a bookcase lined with scrolls and books. He plucks one from the collection and continues walking, tucking you both behind one of the floor to ceiling columns.

The bookcases press in on you from both sides and the tight quarters force you closer to him.

“Have you read any poetry by Catallus?” he asks.

“Not much,” you admit.

Anticipation spreads along your tingling skin when his lips meet the shell of your ear and he whispers, “not much…or not any?”

When you meet his eyes, he has his answer.

“He’s most known for his words on romance and love…”

You reach for the book, but he keeps it from you, his smile growing as confusion takes over your expression.

“We are going to read it here.”

“Here. But Marcus…”

“And you are going to read it to me.”

You swallow heavily, but when his palm flattens against your cheek and his warmth spreads along your skin you breathe him in and lean into his touch.

“I would have you laid out on my bed reading each and every night but given our circumstances, this will have to do.”

“Just reading General?”

His jaw clenches and his fingers press into your skin before he drags your mouth up to his. The book is smashed between you when he hauls you closer and kisses you with such urgency it steals your breath.

“One night very soon you will be mine and I will have you not out in the open with the fear of being caught but in safety where I can hear every sound of pleasure that I draw from these beautiful lips.”

The calloused pad of his thumb runs along your lower lip and his eyes wander over your features.

“Stunning,” he whispers.

Your breathing is heavy, and you grab his wrist, steadying yourself.

“Marcus,” you purr. “I fear I no longer care who hears or sees, I need you. Each night is torture.”

Because of the tall niches of bookcases surrounding you, you’re invisible from across the room, but if anyone were to walk down from the other side of the library, you would be exposed.

He bends to kiss you, starting with the corner of your mouth and humming at the contact.

“You know I could never allow that. I despise even the idea of any other man laying eyes on you.”

He turns you to face the rows of scrolls and reaches around you to open the book, stopping at a specific passage, and then moves your hand to hold it open. His finger points to the title: “Come Live With Me and Be My Love.”

“Read,” he whispers, his breath warm against your ear.

You tongue wets your lips before you start:

“Come live with me, Lesbia, and be my love, And ignore the wagging tongues Of wilted crones and toothless geezers..”

His large hands ran up beneath your tunic, over your hips and across your stomach.

“You are so soft,” he murmurs into your neck.

Your words stutter and he stops his ministrations.

“Princess,” he orders.

You continue, willing your voice to stay steady.

“Suns rise and set, rise and set again, But we, when our brief light is blacked, Must sleep forever, and then forever.”

One of his hands smooths down your side and between your thighs. He teases the wetness he finds there, hissing out a curse when you spread your legs wider for him.

You try to focus on the words in front of you, blinking down at the book.

“Focus,” he whispers.

“So kiss me, Sweet, and kiss me plenty: First a thousand, then a hundred kisses; Then catch your breath and kiss me more: Another thousand, another hundred…”

His lips meet your neck, and at first he presses them softly against your skin then more firmly at your pulse point where he feels the hammering of your heart.

Without any warning he slips a finger inside you and starts to pump it slowly in and out. You groan, needing more and pushing onto his hand.

“Quiet,” he reminds you.

His drags his finger out and teases your clit with small and focused circles.

“Keep reading Princess.”

“I cannot,” you whimper as your hips roll. “I just…Marcus, please!”

“You can,” he says simply and pushes two fingers inside you. “Or we can stop.”

You begin reading again in a tight, stuttering cadence that drives him crazy.

“Still thousands yet till we've lost all count And must begin again, keeping Envious others guessing the sum Of how many kisses much we love.”

You string the words together and although they’re filled with a soft tenderness it does nothing to quell the heavy feeling of lust that rushes through you.

“Touch yourself,” he demands.

“Marcus,” you gasp and the book slips from your fingers.

With shaky trepidation you reach down between your legs and rub his hand brushing against yours as he pushes his fingers in and out of you.

Your legs shake and you squeeze around his fingers, your cry of pleasure muffled when his free hand covers your mouth.

When your muscles stop trembling, he keeps his fingers buried inside you and stifles his moan with his mouth pressed to your neck.

The library is now completely silent, and you realize you have no idea how loud you had been. Did you whisper each word you read? You were so completely lost in him you had no idea.

He pulls his fingers free, releasing a quiet grunt, and turns you to face him.

His lips meet yours in a desperate kiss and when you reach down to take him in your hand he sucks in a breath.

“Princess?” he asks, his eyes dark.

“It is my turn to touch you. Please Marcus.”

As if your name on his lips is his undoing, he releases you and places his palms flat on the bookshelves in front of him.

You drop to your knees, and he trembles.

“Remember, you must be quiet,” you warn with a mischievous grin.

He sucks his teeth when your hand circles around him and gently glides along his hardness. He waits, fingers digging into the wooden shelves and chest heaving, until you wrap your mouth around the tip of him.

Whatever string of words leave his lips are unknown to you and when the first taste of him hits your tongue you moan and take him deeper.

He keeps his eyes locked on you, imprinting the image onto his brain. His hips begin to rock, and he slowly pushes himself deeper, clearing trying to restrain himself.

You roll your tongue and use your hand, pumping and sucking as much of him as you can until he’s groaning a warning above you, the rhythm of his hips stuttering and slowing as he spills down your throat.

When you release him it’s with reluctance and only because he gently takes your arm and drags you up his body. He stares at you and your swollen lips then kisses you hard enough to have your back hitting the bookshelf behind with a thud.

He instantly slides his hand along the curve of your spine in a soothing manner, the only apology he can manage without breaking away.

“You are spectacular,” he breathes against your lips. “I would keep you here with me forever.”

“But I must go,” you say quietly. “My father will surely know of my absence should I stay any longer.”

He nods and reverently brushes his thumb across your cheek before stepping slowly back.

You’re nearing the exit of the library when he reaches for your hand and pulls you into a darkened alcove.

“Just one more,” he murmurs, right before he brings his lips to yours.

It’s soft and sweet and he lingers, not wanting to be the one to pull away.

“A thousand kisses will never be enough,” he whispers against your lips.

You swallow and meet his eyes again, sweeping your fingers through his messy curls.

He presses his hand over yours as you cradle his cheek then brings your knuckles to his lips.

“Until next time, Princess.”

@hiddles-rose @blackwidownat2814 @tripletstephaniescp

#marcus acacius x reader #pedro pascal #marcus acacius #marcus acacius smut #marcus acacius x you #marcus acacius x female reader #marcus acacius x y/n #pedro pascal x reader #marcus acacius fanfiction #marcus acacius x princess!reader #general marcus acacius #gladiator 2 #gladiator 2 fanfiction #pedro pascal characters

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sdr2lovemail · 1 year ago

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Saw your request open for reverse 1999! I not sure what characters you do but could you do smt like troop??idk what it call but basically 'someone ask them if you two are together despite havent establish relationships yet' for medicine pocket, dikke, and tooth fairy? What their reaction and response? If it too much you can cut it down sorry

Oblivious Encounters (GN Reader)

Synopsis: These lovely arcanists are in love and it's obvious to everyone but them.

Notes: I love oblivious pining, a wonderful trope. I'm still trying to get my footing with characters, but I will write for anyone, including NPCs! She/They pronouns are used for Medicine Pocket

Requests are open!

Medicine Pocket:

Parallel play. The act of being alone together. Some people find the best way to spend time with others is to do their own thing.

Next to you, Medicine Pocket scribbles away in their notebook. Ever since the two of you had entered Vertin’s suitcase, her documenting has gotten way more intense. There wasn’t anyone here to dampen the experiments, so Medi was thriving.

You both sit at a table near the window, the setting sun providing just enough light. It had been a few hours since either of you had spoken, finding peace in the silence. Periodically, Med would slide their notebook over for you to read. They didn’t even want any comments on their work. She just wanted to ensure you were ready for the incoming info dump they would give you. What fun is telling someone about your experiments if they’re just going to be lost the whole time?

Amid the comfortable silence, breaking the serene atmosphere, was a shrill voice.

“No! The great Matilda is never wrong, and I will prove I am correct!” The bright-eyed girl was quick with her pace, making it over to the table in just a few strides. With one hand on the table, she leans in close. “How long has this courtship gone on?”

There’s an almost comedic pause.

“What?” Medicine Pocket cocked their head.

Matilda rests her hands on her hips, tilting her head with a sly smirk. “I know a relationship when I see one. But the question is how long it’s been going on.”

It’s Medi’s turn to smirk as they respond before you can answer. “What amazing observational skills. Now tell me, just how did you figure us out?”

“Hmhmhm! Matilda always knows! And it was so obvious.” She laughed.

“Ohhh, was it now?” Medi smiled wide, those sharp teeth on display in a wolfish grin. As you are about to correct Matilda on your relationship, the scientist kicks you under the table, itching to see how this plays out.

“The note sharing, for one. You are so stingy when it comes to sharing. Those longing silences the two of you enjoy. The way you’re always together. There is no hiding it from me!”

You can feel your face grow warmer. Was this romantic? Did people really think that you and Medicine Pocket are together? And was that actually a problem for you?

With a laugh, Medicine Pocket shrugged her shoulders. “Huh, I didn’t think we were that obvious. You figured us out, Matilda. We’ve been courting for a few months now. Obviously, I was the one to start it. They were too flustered even to look my way.”

“Medicine Pocket!” You chastised, face flushing further.

“See, that’s my beloved, always so embarrassed.” Medi reached over the table to take your hand in her gloved ones.

“I knew it! Vertin owes me money!” The energetic girl ran off to find the others and her new source of cash.

Pulling your hand away from the smirking doctor, you let out a groan. “Why would you tell her that? She’s going to tell everyone.”

“I wanted to see what would happen. We are practically dating anyway.” They shrugged, acting way too nonchalant.

Dikke:

Dikke enjoyed gossip. Well, not just gossiping. She enjoyed listening to others talk about anything. Hearing people engage in idle chatter was an oddly calming pastime for her. However, she couldn’t say it was truthful when the talk of the suitcase was about her.

“Wouldn’t you like to buy your love some diamonds? I have quite the assortment. Necklaces, rings, anything that is sure to charm your lady.”

Oh, how that scammer’s voice irked Dikke. She was about to move, wanting to read somewhere quiet, but she heard another voice. One she held dearly.

“Oh, I’m sure the selection of diamonds is… lovely. But I don’t have anyone to give jewelry to.” You answered curiously, unsure of what she was talking about.

Tennant let out a chuckle, brushing her hand against your cheek. “There’s no need to be so coy. I know the judge has stolen your heart.” She knew Dikke was watching. She wanted to rile her up and get a reaction. It would be fun to watch someone so proper get a bit angry.

Dikke rises from her seat, walking over to you and Tennant with quick steps. Her face looks more than displeased.

“Why hello there, judge. To what do we owe the pleasure?” Tennant smirked, knowing she got what she wanted.

Her gaze practically bore through the blond woman’s body. The grip on her sword unconsciously grows tighter. “Thou should watch what drivel leaves thine mouth.”

“My, what harsh words. Calling your own relationship drivel.” Tennant runs a single finger down your arm with a borderline mocking frown. “I would never treat you that way, dear.”

It was quick. You barely saw when it happened. Dikke swiped the hand off you in an almost uncharacteristic act of jealousy. “Perhaps thou should mind thy own affairs.” Before there could even be a response, Dikke speaks once more. “Enough of this. Leave us.”

Figuring there was no point in taunting her further, Tennant leaves. Not without dragging her hand along your back, wanting to give Dikke one last teasing parting gift.

“I’m so sorry about that, Dikke. You know how Tennant can be sometimes.” You apologized with a sheepish smile. While you felt like you were just seeing things, her cheeks seemed slightly pink.

With the pest out of her hair, Dikke’s eyes soften slightly. “Thou shouldn’t let rumors fester. Lest they form into something more sinister.” She bows her head towards you and departs, not to finish her book but to find you a present better than diamonds.

Tooth Fairy:

“There has been an incline of cavities at the Foundation. Perhaps I’ve been handing out too many toffees.” Tooth Fairy sighed as she shuffled through her examination papers. The corners of her lips tugged down in a near-invisible frown.

Walking over to her side of the medical wing, you lean over her shoulder, taking a peek. “I doubt it’s your toffees. The kids probably aren’t brushing as often as they say. I know they lie to me about where they get their scrapes and bruises.”

“Was that a poor attempt at making me feel better?” If it were anyone else, they probably would’ve been hurt by that comment. However, as the Foundation’s current nurse, you spend a lot of your days with the dentist. You’ve learned to discern when she’s playing around from her usual tone.

You let out a puff of a laugh, lightly shoving her shoulder. “Speaking of toffee, you wouldn’t happen to have any on you, would you?” There’s a soft smile on your face as you hold out your hand.

There was a faint sound of squeaking leather as Tooth Fairy reached into her pocket. “You’ll be the one with cavities if I continue to spoil you with candies.” She hands you a sweet despite her words. Her gloved hand lingers on yours for a second too long, dainty fingers caressing your wrist as she presses the toffee into your palm.

“But you never say no.” You smiled while unwrapping the candy. After popping it into your mouth, you start to walk out of the office. “I have to go meet with Madam Z about some paperwork. I’ll see you at lunch.”

The way Tooth Fairy watched you leave was downright pining. Her gaze locked on the doorframe. Her eyes soon lower, seeing a certain silver-haired young lady.

“Excuse me, is the nurse here?”

“Hello, Ms. Vertin. I’m sorry, they just stepped out. Is there anything I can help you with?” Tooth Fairy asked as the small child sat on one of the medical beds.

Young Vertin casts her eyes to the floor, bringing a hand up to her head. “I’ve got a terrible headache. I wanted to ask for one of their remedies.”

Tooth Fairy smiled. It was the third time Vertin came complaining about a headache this week. She knew she just wanted sweets, but she couldn’t help but humor her once again. “Well, I happen to know where they keep their medicine.”

The dentist kneeled at your desk, opening the drawer to grab from your stash of lollipops.

“Are the two of you married?” Vertin asked, her head titling curiously.

Nearly dropping the lollipop, Tooth Fairy’s eyes widen a bit. It was an innocent question, but it still made her falter. “What makes you ask that?” Quickly regaining her composure, she hands Vertin the candy.

“When I read stories, the parents in the books act the way you do. They always spend time together and give each other gifts.” Vertin explained.

Tooth Fairy sits at her desk, watching the girl unwrap her sweet. “I see. No, we are not married. We are simply work acquaintances, nothing more.”

Vertin nods before speaking again. “You two should get married. I could be the flower girl.”

“I… will have to discuss that with them. For now, you should be getting to class.” Tooth Fairy turned back towards her papers, hoping to hide her slightly flushed cheeks.

#medicine pocket x reader #dikke x reader #tooth fairy x reader #reverse 1999 x reader #reverse 1999 #medicine pocket #dikke #tooth fairy #x reader

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tenofmuses · 1 year ago

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Free Witchcraft Resources for Beginners

A couple months ago I made a post shouting out the fact that witchcraft doesn’t require any money to get started (or to be practiced, for that matter), and I had a few people ask me about what they can do that’s free, especially as a beginner, so I wrote up this post. I was lost and broke when I was getting started with my craft, and it was really difficult to find tips for beginners that weren’t just “buy these things!” I’m hoping this will be useful for people who are looking for a place to begin.

So. You’re interested in witchcraft and would like to find out more. Maybe you keep seeing those “crystals/herbs/books/etc. beginner witches should have” posts, and you’re frustrated, because you want to begin your practice, but don’t have the money for those supplies. I was once in that spot, and even now that I’m five years into my practice, I have rarely purchased any of the supplies witchtok deems to be fundamental. Here are some places you can begin instead. Let’s get started!

Info continues below.

Foundations

By foundations, I’m referring to things that aren’t explicitly witchcraft, but that I have found very beneficial within my own practice.

1. Before anything, I recommend asking yourself a simple question: why do I want to practice witchcraft, and what do I hope to get out of it? You may not know for sure yet, and your answer will likely change over time, but having some intentions going in can be helpful when you’re in the early stages of research. When I was starting out, I felt very overwhelmed by the amount of info out there, so if you have a bit of an idea of what you’re specifically interested in, that can be helpful to get you going.

2. Meditation: not all witches meditate, but a lot of the skills you develop through meditation can be helpful within witchcraft. You can try out secular meditation (apps like Balance and Headspace, as well as Insight Timer—the former has a mix of secular and spiritual meditations), or you can find a witchcraft-specific guided meditation on YouTube. For neurodivergent folks out there, I recommend looking into active meditation, which I’ve found to be quite beneficial for myself.

For me, it’s always important to remain grounded when I’m doing any spiritual practice, and meditation is a good skill you can work on to help with that. I also find that having a background in meditation can be really helpful later down the line when/if you are attempting visualization and/or astral projection, witch’s flight, and so forth.

3. Journaling: another thing that isn’t specifically witchcraft-related, but is an important skill to harness, on my opinion. To me, it’s crucial to be in touch with what I’m feeling (especially when it comes to doing spellwork), and journaling is one great way to do that. If you’re stuck and don’t know where to begin, look up witchcraft (or general) journal prompts on here or somewhere else. A lot of the ones that come up will be shadow work, which can be intense, so only do what feels comfortable for you.

I’d also like to note that automatic writing/drawing is an entirely free option if you’re interested in communing with spirits or deities. Essentially it involves getting into a trance-like state (usually in a dark room only lit by candlelight or similar—this is to avoid distractions) with a piece of paper and pen, and you write or draw everything that comes to your head without thinking about it. And then you go back and see what sort of messages you may be receiving. It’s a bit hard to explain and I’m not very experienced in it myself, but it’s something worth looking into if it sounds interesting to you!

4. Look at what you have, instead of what you don’t: a lot of beginner witch resources will list specific items that you should have, without really explaining why. And without that knowledge of how/why having an item is important, you might find your Must Have crystal sitting unused on a shelf somewhere. So instead of focusing on the items you want or feel like you should have, look at what you do have. Are there plants or herbs in your house/yard that you feel drawn to? Do you have a collection of cool rocks and stones? How do these items make you feel?

For me, a large part of my craft is my belief in Animism (the belief that all living things have innate spiritual qualities, like a soul, spirit, or specific energy) and this can play into the way you interact with the natural world if it’s a belief you also subscribe to. Try and feel the presence of a plant to see if it gives you any specific feeling. It does? Great! Now you have a correspondance for that plant. And it’s even better than the correspondances you’ll get in a book because it’s based on your own personal connection and intuition. That’s what is most important.

5. When in doubt, use your intuition. You might find a source that says cinnamon should be used for protection. Another will say it should be used for abundance spells. What matters the most is what you think about an herb/plant/stone/colour, or whatever else you may utilize. I recommend to start keeping a list of what you associate these things with. It can take awhile to build up a personalized list, but once you have one, it’ll be a lot more useful than what a correspondances book says to do.

6. Scour your pantry and get cooking: are you wanting to try out a spell but you haven’t bought the ingredients? Look in your pantry. You may be surprised by how many commonly used witchcraft herbs you find in there. And if you have been starting to associate certain herbs or spices with specific feelings or energies, that’s a great way to get started with creating your own spell.

You can do a spell in many ways, but when I was starting out, one of my favourite ways was to incorporate a certain herb or spice into food I made. Say you’re making a soup and maybe you want a bit of protection, so you add some ground pepper with the intention of that pepper protecting you as you stir it into the soup. Same goes for any other ingredient you’d like to use. A little intention goes a long way!

7. Dedicate your actions, time, or energy: if you’re interested at all in working with deities, ancestors, and other spirits but don’t have the time/space to build an altar—or maybe you aren’t sure how involved you want to be with this part of witchcraft—you can devote an action to the entity. This can be simple. For example, when I worked with Apollo, I would use taking my meds and vitamins as an act of devotion to him. This is an offering. And offerings can be anything you want them to be. They don’t have to be expensive or fancy!

It’s also important to note that you do not need to work with deities or spirits to be a witch. You don’t even have to believe in them. Many witches are atheists or don’t work with any deities at all. But for those who are interested, simple offerings can be a good place to start.

8. Practice energy work: in my view, energy work is the most important skill to learn for your craft, since so many things build off of it. And with energy work, you don’t need to spend any amount of money on it. All you need is yourself, your intuition, and anything else—I mean that quite literally, you can practice feeling the energy of other people, pets, trees, buildings, foods, socks, your favourite pen, and whatever else you think of!

Once you get to know the energy of the things around you, you can more effectively utilize them as tools within your practice (this builds off of the intuition point I made earlier).

For example, as a child I lived in a house that was surrounded by cedar trees. It was a place where I felt very safe. To this day, when I see or smell a cedar tree, I feel safe and protected. You can read this any way you’d like—to me it’s both a spiritual and psychological phenomenon—but this is one example of sensing energy.

As a witch, you can practice that skill and use it to get to know the tools you’d like to use within your own craft (the things that connect to you personally, not what you’re told you should connect with). This isn’t an easy skill by any means, so if it doesn’t come naturally to you, that’s perfectly okay!

For more on this subject, I recommend two books: Braiding Sweetgrass by Robin Kimmerer (more on animism in particular) and Psychic Witch by May Auryn (lots of exercises to practice working with and sensing energy).

Where to Go for Learning

After you’ve thought a bit about some of the above, or skipped it altogether if it doesn’t suit you, you’re probably wanting some good resources that will actually tell you how to do the witchcraft thing. But before that, I want to reiterate again that this is your practice, and you should only do what you are interested in. So take what you want and leave what you don’t.

I’m going to point you in three primary directions for learning good information: books, podcasts, and YouTube.

But first, I want to issue a massive disclaimer for the YouTube information (and some books, for that matter). You should not have one sole source for your information. Books that have bibliographies are always the most trustworthy sources. And even though I trust the information coming from the YouTubers I’ll mention—especially because I’ve read similar information in several witchcraft books—don’t take their word at face-value. Be critical of what you’re told. Believe what you believe. This is a skill you’ll learn over time. It can be a bit overwhelming at first, but it will get easier to discern what’s good info vs. bad info, over time.

Before you get started, I highly recommend watching this helpful video by HearthWitch with info on how to vet your witchcraft sources: link.

Books

In my view, books are the Best source of information, period. Anyone can publish an article or video online, but not everyone can publish a book. So there tends to be a bit more reliable info in witchcraft books.

As far as knowing what book you should begin with, there are lots of lists out there for beginners, and I recommend just looking at one of those lists and picking what sounds interesting to you. Take what you like and leave what you don’t.

Most of the YouTubers I’ve listed below have videos recommending books for beginners.

If you’re interested in British folk witchcraft, I started out with Folk Witchcraft by Roger J. Horne and it was a brilliant beginners guide that I recommend to anyone who is interested in that branch of witchcraft.

As always, while you read witchcraft books, be critical of the information you are presented with. Unfortunately, lots of witchcraft books (especially the classic ones) can be rooted in concepts like bioessentialism, colonialism, and racism. My recommendation is to not take any author’s word as gospel and to use your critical thinking skills when reading witchcraft books.

Where I live, books are EXPENSIVE. And when you’re just starting out in your practice, you might not have the money or ability to go out and buy a book just yet. Maybe you’re still unsure if witchcraft is right for you. Or maybe you’re in the “broom closet.” Whatever the reason, here are some free places to find books.

1. The public library: a bit obvious, but a great resource to look at, because you never know what your library might have. Libraries are the best. And entirely free!

2. Library apps like Libby or Overdrive: especially helpful if you don’t want to bring home a physical witchcraft book, or if your branch doesn’t have any copies of what you’re looking for. You can also get some audiobooks on there.

3. Archive.org: aka the web archive. Entirely free and entirely legal, this works as an online library service where you can check out a book for a bit of time right from your computer. Sometimes you can download PDFs as well. I’ve found a lot of my favourite witchcraft books on there, so if you have a specific title in mind, search it there.

YouTube

First, as a bit of a caveat before recommending you to watch YouTube videos on witchcraft: in my view, books are the best source of information for any witch, as they are able to contain a large degree of nuanced and research-informed information. But books aren’t a simple solution for everyone, and I’ve learned a lot from informed YouTubers over the years (in fact, like many witches, I was first exposed to witchcraft via Harmony Nice on YouTube!).

I’m including a list here of witch YouTubers that I personally recommend because I have found that their content aligns with information I have read in books and other research-informed sources over the years, and because I find them to be generally reliable.

I want to note here that this list is rather biased, as I tend to watch witchcraft YouTubers whose practices mirror my own in some ways. So most of these practitioners have practices informed by European folk witchcraft, and are not very diverse as a result. If any practitioners have further recommendations to add on, especially for practitioners of colour and practices that are different from mine, please do so!

My recommendations:

ChaoticWitchAunt: folk witchcraft, specifically in the Italian tradition, some great beginner content, info on working with saints and spirits.

TheWitchOfWonderlust: death magic, spellwork, great beginner content, lots of excellent info on working with spirits.

HearthWitch: truly a well of information on British witchcraft, beginner videos on any topic you can think of, q&a livestreams, and there’s even a video on vetting witchcraft sources that I really recommend for beginners.

The Redheaded Witch: folk witchcraft and folklore, spirit and ancestor work, daily witchcraft ideas, some beginner videos.

TheGreenWitch: such an excellent resource for herbal/green witchcraft, videos on spellwork, ingredients, tools, and more.

Mintfaery: lots of beginner information, videos on working with the fae, nature witchcraft, and lots of fun witchy days in the life.

Ella Harrison: German folk witchcraft, great beginner resources, including some more niche traditional craft topics like witch’s ladders.

The Norse Witch: info on Norse witchcraft and Heathenry, Norse paganism, and some content about astrology.

simplywitched: lots of great everyday witchcraft content, pagan witchcraft, more vlog style.

Warrior Witch Nike: witchy book reviews, paganism, deity work, some astrology content.

Mhara Starling: the place to go for anyone interested in Welsh witchcraft and folk magic related to Wales.

Alwyn Oak: lots of witch’s guides, especially relating to sabbats (those popularized in Wicca), forest witchcraft, gorgeous videos.

Ivy The Occultist: chaos magick and lots of interviews with practitioners from a variety of paths/backgrounds.

Shadow Harvest: personal day in the life witchy content, some videos looking at working with dark goddesses and deity work in general.

Note: some of these YouTubers have written their own witchcraft books geared towards beginners, so if you enjoy their videos and want to learn more, check those out.

Podcasts

The Astrology Podcast: not specifically witchcraft, but if you want to learn about astrology in detail, this is an excellent place to begin. Link goes to YouTube.

Books and Broomsticks: all kinds of good info, especially pertaining to folk magic, witch guests invited on to share more about their own practice. Link goes to Spotify.

Southern Bramble: A Podcast of Crooked Ways: a variety of witchcraft related topics, interviews, and discussions, often revolving around folk magic and traditional craft—interviews show different traditions. Link goes to Spotify.

New World Witchery - The Search for American Traditional Witchcraft: what it says on the tin; various topics and conversations through an American traditional/folk magic lens by the author of the (amazing) book with the same name. Link goes to Spotify.

Salty Witches Podcast by Cat & Cauldron: traditional witchcraft through a modern lens, another podcast that has a wide variety of topics covered. Link goes to Spotify.

—

As always, if anyone has any additional (free!) resources to add onto these ones, please do so.

Good luck to all of the beginner witches who are embarking on their spiritual journeys, and I hope some of these tips have been helpful! :)

-Em

#been working on this post since october first which is just crazy…it took So Long #I searched everywhere for info like this when I was a beginner but all I found were lists of things to purchase #which isn’t helpful when you’re broke and living through a recession!#I hope this hopes someone out there <3 #witchcraft resources #witchcraft 101 #witchcraft info #beginner witchcraft #witchcraft #witchblr #beginner witch #folk witchcraft #baby witch #resources #my post

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lilbardrhi · 1 month ago

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"Broken", Not Stupid - 9: Shoulders Aren't Earrings

Pairing: alpha!Simon "Ghost" Riley x unsual omega!CO (13)

CW: Omegaverse; cult-like situation; dehumanization; selling children to cults

Author's Note: Check out 13's new ask blog! @ask13-cod and I do apologize if this part is rough, I promise I'm trying c':

Something soft and warm nuzzles against my cheek. It tickles so I srunch my nose and open my eyes.

Bright blue feline eyes stare back at me and I blink slowly.

Where am I? Salvation doesn't allow pets...

The cat, black fur shiny and smooth, nudges its nose against my cheek. It meows loudly and paws lightly at my shoulder.

"Selene, hush. She's trying to rest," a vaguely familiar voice calls quietly from beyond the cat.

Selene.

Simon and Selene.

Once I recognize Selene and Simon's voice I sit up and look around. The smell of bacon drifts towards me and my eyes drop back to Selene.

"Good morning," I greet her gently and scratch sleepily under her chin.

Simon appears in my doorway and sighs softly when he sees me sitting up.

"Did she wake you up? I'm sorry. She's been pawing at and meowing at you for the past twenty minutes. I tried to lock her out of the room but she nearly bit me over it," he huffs and sends Selene a half-hearted glare.

"It's alright, I don't mind," I assure him groggily. "What time is it? Did I sleep too late?"

"What do you mean 'too late'? It's barely 8 in the morning."

His eyes suggest he's confused but I begin dragging myself out of the bed-

No. No this is my nest.

The events of yesterday and last night finally return to my exhausted mind and my eyes widen.

"I don't... have to be up at a certain time every day anymore," I whisper as a smile pulls across my face.

"Well, not really, no. Are you alright, 13?" Simon shifts in my doorway, like he's uncomfortable.

I stand and stretch my arms over my head, still smiling.

"I can't remember the last time I slept like that," I say after a yawn and lower my hands to pet Selene. "I feel great! Are you cooking? I thought I smelled bacon."

Simon nods slowly and steps toward the direction of the kitchen.

"Yeah. Figured I'd make breakfast. Try to make you feel more comfortable," he mumbles as I step past him.

He's studying me closely as I make my way into the kitchen and snag a piece of bacon off the counter.

"Holy shit," I groan through the mouthful of bacon. "I haven't had decent bacon in actual years! Great idea, honestly."

Simon's head tilts slightly to the side, still observing me closely as he steps back up to the stove.

"You're not allergic to cheese are you? I didn't see any mention of in your information, but figured I may as well ask," he asks as he holds up a larhe block of cheese.

"Thankfully no," I assure him with a smile. After a moment of thinking, and watching him beging grating the cheese, I ask, "What all did they tell you about me? Did they just give you a massive info packet and tell you to sign on the dotted line?"

His hand slips, nearly dragging his knuckles across the cheese grater. Then he sighs and sets the block down.

"Do you want to discuss this now? Or do you want to wait until you've at least had some food?"

I frown, thinking again. Food before getting into anything to do with Salvation would probably be the best. Especially after my reaction to trying to order food last night.

"Good point," I say finally. "Tell me about you instead."

Right after I make my request, Simon's phone begins buzzing on the counter in front of me. The caller ID says "Dumbass".

"Well, that's not very nice," I tell him as he picks up the phone.

"It's affectionate. Also accurate. Alright if I answer?" Simon asks as he holds up his phone, waiting for my response.

Snagging another piece of bacon from the counter I nod.

"Don't mind me. Can even go in the other room if you need."

"No. Stay there," he says before answering, "Johnny."

I can just barely hear a deep but energetic voice on the other line.

"Yes, she's awake." He pauses. "I haven't had a chance to say anything to her yet, Johnny," he sighs. "No, she's not been up very long. I'll talk to her about it and text you her response."

With that he ends the call and starts cracking eggs into a frying pan.

"I assume 'she' is me," I start slowly then take a bite of the strip of bacon between my fingers, "so who is 'Johnny'?"

"My best mate and co-worker," Simons says without turning to me. "I planned on taking you to the shops today, get you clothes that actually fit you, and... he's wanting to go with us."

"Are you comfortable with that? Aren't you alphas supposed to be like... super territorial or something? And we're not, y'know, mated."

My line of questions and statements sound awkward. I'm not against meeting the guy, especially if he's so close to Simon. It's only natural that I'd come across the guy eventually. I just don't know that Simon, my apparent alpha, is comfortable with that.

Omegas are supposed to take that into consideration, right?

"You can say no," he says flatly, back still to me.

"I'm not against it," I frown. "I'm just... trying to be considerate of how you feel about the situation."

Simon's entire body goes still for a moment before he glances over his shoulder at me. Then he goes back to cooking.

"Stop eating bacon or you won't eat the eggs," he mumbles. "I trust Johnny with my life and more. If you want to meet him, that's fine. He's just overexcited, as per usual, and has no patience. Since you and I met not long ago, I wanted you to have say in this," he explains stiffly.

I want you to feel comfortable in the situation we put ourselves in.

Pretty sure that's what he meant, and I do appreciate it. I appreciate it a lot, actually.

"Yeah, I'm good with it," I tell him and resist the urge to pick up more bacon.

"After we eat, I'll get you fresh clothes. They'll still be mine-"

"Simon, your shoulders aren't earrings. Relax the and get them, away from your ears."

"What?" he asks, finally turning to me. But his shoulders are still pushed up and tense.

I give him a half-hearted scolding look and step closer to him. Then I reach up and rest my hands on his shoulders, pushing them down gently.

"Better?"

His eyes are wide and he seems frozen in place for a moment. But he nods.

"Yeah," he mumbles then turns back to the eggs.

He insists on making us each a plate then guides us into the sunroom to eat at the table in there.

What a strange man I've found myself tied to.

Masterlist | CoD Masterlist | Part One

Tag List: @lucienofthelakes @lostintransist @demothers-empty-blog @scaredyspooks @tessakate @one-really-annoying-tree-rat @nerdyphantomtheorist @gazsluckyhat @peanutismynickname

#rhi writes #bns

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just-dreaming-marvel · 7 days ago

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I Won't Say (I'm In Love) ~ Tony's Version

MAIN MASTERLIST / MARVEL MASTERLIST / MUSICAL INSPIRED FIC MASTERLIST

Tony Stark x Female!Reader

Word Count: 2,215ish

Request: Won't Say from Hercules + Natasha is quite sure Tony and reader are in love with each other, but she's after more info so she can try and work out a plan to get them together. She's managed to get a confession out of Tony. Now she's trying to get her best friend to confess, maybe during a girl's night in movie night along with Wanda. But she's stubborn as fuck. But so is Nat, and she ain't ending this night without the info she wants!

Notes: I hope this makes sense... I'm a little worried especially since I steered away from the request a bit.

“If there’s a prize for rotten judgement

I guess I’ve already won that

No man is worth the aggravation

That’s ancient history, been there, done that”

You sighed as you came home from yet another failed date. Another man who cared more about you being a housewife than a working Avenger. You carried your shoes in your hand as you made your way to the common room of the Compound for a drink.

“You alright?” Tony’s voice had you jumping.

“Tony!” You exclaimed. He was sitting on the couch, nursing his own drink. “You scared me.”

“Sorry,” he shot you a smile. “But seriously, you alright?”

“I’m fine. Just another failed attempt at dating.” You grabbed a beer from the fridge before plopping down next to Tony on the couch. “I’m beginning to think it’s not worth it anymore.”

“What? Dating?”

“Yeah. Searching for someone to spend your life with. They either are awful straight from the start or they hook you in and break your heart once you’re fully committed… I think I’ll stick to being single.”

“Not everyone is like that. You just have to find the right one.” Tony stood up. “Don’t drink too much of my liquor worrying about it.” He leaned down and kissed your head. “Goodnight, sweetheart.”

“Night, Tones.”

You sighed as Tony disappeared down the hall. You hated the reason behind your insistence on going on dates. Anthony Edward Stark. He was your type. Similar to guys you’ve dated before. Which is why you’d never admit to your feelings for him. You would just get hurt if you did. Tony wasn’t the type for a serious relationship, at least not anymore. He made that very clear since his and Pepper’s break up where he was back to sleeping around with any woman who looked at him a certain way. You couldn’t let yourself be one of them, knowing that you couldn’t keep your feelings in check.

~~~

Natasha woke up at her usual time to work out, surprised to see that Tony was already in the gym, a sweaty mess.

“Hard night?” She questioned, coming over to where the man was running on the treadmill.

“Something like that,” he grumbled, focusing on his running.

“Did Y/N go on another date last night?” Tony didn’t bother answering that question. “You know that there’s an easy solution to this. Just ask her out.”

“Natasha—“

“She’ll say yes.”

“You don’t know that.”

Natasha stepped onto the front of the treadmill to be face to face with the billionaire. “And if I find out it’s true, will you ask her out?”

“Maybe.”

“Great.” She jumped off the treadmill and headed for the door.

“Wait.” He paused the treadmill and jumped off it. “Where are you going?”

“To gather the evidence I need to stop you guys from being idiots any longer.”

“Who’d you think you’re kidding?

He’s the earth and heaven to you

Try to keep it hidden

Honey, we can see right through you (oh, no)

Girl, you can’t conceal it

We know how you feel and who you’re thinking of (oh)”

You were sitting on the couch in the common room, various teammates around. Vision was talking about something that you had stopped listening to some time ago. Your focus was on Tony. He was standing in the kitchen area, preparing a cup of coffee while talking to Bruce.

Natasha caught you staring and rolled her eyes. She tapped your arm, causing you to look her way, before she motioned to the hallway with her head. You knew that if she wanted to talk, there was no avoiding her. You followed her into one of the conference rooms down the hallway.

“What’s up?” You asked, taking a seat in one of the chairs.

Natasha leaned against the large glass conference table, arms folded over her chest. “Can you make it more obvious?”

“What are you talking about, Nat?”

“The fact that you’re head over heels in love with Tony.”

“No chance, no way

I won’t say it, no, no

You swoon, you sigh

Why deny it? Oh-oh

It’s too cliche (oh)

I won’t say I’m in love (shoo-doop, shoo-doop)

(Ooh)”

Your heart dropped at Natasha’s statement. “Wh—What? No, I’m not.”

“Oh, please,” she scoffed. “Your eyes were practically in the shape of hearts.”

“I seriously don’t know what you’re talking about, Nat. Tony is my friend. That is all.”

“You’re really going to try to lie to me?”

“I’m not lying.”

“Okay, I see how it is.” Natasha stood up and went to the door. “You know, keeping your feelings inside will only hurt you both more, right?”

“I’ve been hurt too many times, Nat. I can’t do it again. With anyone. No more dates for me. I’m good with being all by myself.”

“I thought my heart had learned its lesson (ooh)

It feel so good when you start out (ooh)

My head is screaming, ‘get a grip, girl!” (Ah)

Unless you’re dying to cry your heart out”

Clearly, your heart had not learned its lesson. Though you had been pushing your feelings down for Tony successfully for a while now, something happened since your talk with Natasha. You were acting like an idiot. Like some middle schooler who couldn’t talk to her crush and it was becoming a serious problem.

“Are you doing okay, Y/N?” Tony asked one day after you ruined something in his lab when he was helping fit you to a new suit. “Something’s been… off lately with you. I’m started to grow concerned.”

“I’m fine,” you said too quickly, unable to met his gaze. You internally cringed, wishing that you could just get a grip already.

“Cause that was believable.” He continued working. “You know that you can talk to me, right?”

“I know.” Just never about this, you thought.

“You keep on denying (oh)

Who you are and how you’re feeling

Baby, we’re not buying

Hon, we saw you hit the ceiling (oh)

Face it like a grown-up

When you gonna own up that you got, got, got it bad? (Whoa)”

Just another one of these stupid gala’s that the Team was forced to attend. You were standing to the side of the room, eyes focused on your drink. You were dressed in something that Natasha had picked for you and immediately noticed that Tony was wearing a matching tie as soon as you got here. You were trying to avoid everything and everyone, too caught up in your own world, to notice someone coming up to you.

“Hey, sweetheart.” You jumped at Tony’s voice, despite it being one of your favorite things to hear. “Sorry,” he chuckled. “Came to check on you. You okay?”

“Yeah,” you squeaked. “Fine.”

One of his brows rose as he looked at your unbelievingly. “Well, I think I have an idea to make it better.” He grabbed your hand and pulled you towards the dance floor.

“Tony, no, I—“

“You need to relax.”

Tony took your drink and set it on the nearby table before tugging you into the middle of the crowd of couples dancing. He readjusted the hand he was already holding so that it was better for dancing while his other hand came around your back and pulled you close to him. He began leading you in a small circle. His eyes were focused on you while you were trying to look anywhere else.

“You keep doing that,” he mumbled.

“What?” You questioned, still not looking at him.

“Avoiding me… why?”

“I— I’m not avoiding you.”

Tony scoffed. “Could’ve fooled me. You won’t even look at me.” Your eyes slowly met his deep brown ones. A small smile formed across his face. “There they are… I’ve missed those beautiful eyes.”

Your heart was hammering against your chest as your face heated up at his words. You had to force yourself not to look away.

“We used to talk about everything,” Tony admitted quietly. “But you’ve been pulling away.”

“Just a lot going on,” you muttered. “Been pulled on a lot of different missions.”

“That’s not it and you know it… Is it… are you… is there some you’re seeing? Did a date workout?”

“No,” you quickly shook your head. “I’m not seeing anyone.”

“Good.”

“Good?”

“I just mean that good that no one’s hurting you. That— That’s it.”

The Team watched as you and Tony continued to dance and chat.

“She’s clearly in love with him,” Natasha commented. “Why can’t she see how in love with her Tony is?”

“Stop meddling, Nat,” Steve reprimanded. “Let things happen when they happen.”

“Says the man who waited too long.”

“Hey! That was low.”

“But true,” Bucky commented.

“There has to be a way that we can get them together,” continued Nat. “And I will be making it happen. Just watch.”

“No chance, no way

I won’t say it, no, no

Give up, give in

Check the grin, you’re in love

This scene won’t play

I won’t say I’m in love (you’re doing flips)

(Read our lips, you’re in love)”

Tony and you were in the lab. He had requested your help with one of his suits. The suit just shot him across the lab and you couldn’t help but burst into a fit of laughter.

“Tony!” You laughed. “You alright?”

“I’m fine,” he groaned, sitting up.

You rushed over and reached out a hand. Tony grabbed your outstretched hand, but instead of using it to pull himself up, he pulled you down. You squealed as you landed on Tony. He laughed, securing you to him. You froze as you realized how close your faces were. Tony’s laughter died down too as his eyes flickered to your lips. You shivered as his hand slipped up your body to cup your cheek, thumb rubbing against your skin.

“I…” you breathed out, mind reeling. “I got to go.”

You quickly pushed yourself off of Tony and rushed out of the room. Tony sighed, putting his hands over his eyes and he got angry with himself.

“You’re way off base

I won’t say it (she won’t say it loud)

Get off my case (sha-la)

I won’t say it (ooh)

Girl, don’t be proud

It’s okay, you’re in love”

You had been completely avoiding Tony since the incident in the lab and everyone, especially Tony, can tell.

“Leave me alone, Nat!” You yelled as she tried to convince you to talk to Tony for what felt like the millionth time that day. “Seriously!”

“You are doing more harm than good at this point, Y/N!” She replied, not giving up. “Just be honest with yourself and Tony. You both deserve better than this.”

“Please, leave me be, Nat!”

“It’s okay to feel this way! It’s normal to be in love and to be scared. Tony’s scared too.”

“You don’t know what you’re taking about.”

Natasha sighed, knowing that you weren’t going to back down so it was time for her plan B to be put into place. She got a tranquilizer gun from her boot and shot you in the back. You gasped, falling forward and passing out quickly. She shook her head as she grabbed your body and began dragging you away.

~~~

You woke up with a groan. Looking around, you realized that you were laying on a table in one of the conference rooms. Tony was on the other end, sitting in one of the chairs.

“What’s—“ You cut yourself up to clear your throat as you sat up. “What’s going on?”

“Romanoff,” Tony answered. “She locked us in here and isn’t going to let us out unless…”

“Unless?”

Tony sighed, lifting his head to look at you. “Unless we confess our feelings.”

“No,” you immediately said, shaking your head. You scrambled off the table and onto your feet. “She can’t do this.”

Tony stood up and slowly began coming over to you. “Why? Why can’t she?”

“Because… Because… I… She just can’t.”

“Is it because you don’t feel the way she thinks you do or is it because you do?”

“Tony… I can’t… I won’t say anything… I can’t get hurt again.”

“I wouldn’t hurt you, sweetheart… Never.”

“You can’t promise that.”

“But I can show it. If you’d let me.”

“Tony… I…” Your heart was screaming at you to just tell him that you loved him, but your mind was winning. “I… I’m sorry… I can’t say it. I can’t. I… I care too much… I have to protect myself. I have to—“

Tony grabbed your hand and pulled you into him. His lips attached to yours in a swift motion, catching you off guard.

“Oh

At least out loud

I won’t say I’m in love

(Shoo-doop, shoo-doop, shoo-doop, shoo-doop)

(Sha-la-la-la-la-la, ah)”

Tony guided you through the tender kiss, his hands holding your face close to his. You allowed yourself to relax and melt into him.

“I love you, too,” he whispered against your lips when he finally broke the kiss. “I love you, too. And I will do whatever I can to show you every day.” His lips pecked yours. “Every damn day. I love you.”

“And if I won’t say it back just yet?” you nervously questioned.

“You don’t ever have to say it, if you’re not ready. But I’ll still be here. I promise.”

#avengers x reader #marvel fanfiction #avengers fanfiction #tony stark fanfiction #tony stark x reader #marvel imagine #the avengers x reader #avengers imagine #tony stark x you #tony stark x y/n #tony stark x female!reader #tony stark x fem!reader #tony stark x f!reader #tony stark x female reader #iron man imagine #iron man x reader #iron man fanfiction #marvel x reader

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sixosix · 1 year ago

Text

THAWED | LYNEY X FEM!READER SERIES

THAWED (MASTERLIST) — the lyney childhood-enemies-to-frenemies-to-lovers-kinda series that no one asked for, ft. fluff, a whole lot of bickering, flirting, and everything in between

STATUS. complete.

OTHER INFO.

DISCLAIMER. will contain spoilers. this series will be as dark as genshin lore can be, and this won’t strictly follow genshin’s actual lore—i’ll be making up a lot of stuff for the sake of the fic so there will be inaccuracies, NOT CANON COMPLIANT!! the timeline of events will be vastly different. each chapter will have their own warnings as well, so keep an eye out for that!

NOTES. hello, everyone !!!!!!! welcome to my lyney series inspired by taylor’s reputation album. how it works is each chapter will be titled after each song off of the album as u can see below,,, hope u enjoy reading as excited i am for rep tv!! :D

tysm to naosaki and kruinka for helping me brainstorm w this fic (and also helping me when i was visibly all over the place because of this series)

CHAPTERS.

i — are you ready for it?

The House of the Hearth was perfect. This was where you thrived—where no one else could take this feeling away. But then Lynette became a part of the ‘family’, and with it, she dragged along Lyney.

ii — i don’t wanna hurt you (i just wanna be)

You look more like a soldier than an orphan, Lyney thinks. It’s beautiful in all the wrong ways.

iii — you gotta leave before you get left

Desperately, Lyney melts them away, but your footsteps have already gone out of earshot. It’s an answer in itself: Don’t bother. Take the hint, Lyney; you already messed it up.

iv — for you i would fall from grace

“What now? What do you want me to do? Strut back into their lives and demand all their Fatui secrets as if I never left?”

Aether nestles into his seat. “Prove to me that I can trust them just as much as you do. Who knows, you might get something out of this, too.”

v — you must like me for me

Lyney laughs. It sounds like music that has haunted you for years—and with a new one playing, it’ll torment you for years more. He loosens his grip but keeps you caged in, still. You’re twirled around to face him, and something about his expression has you swallowing thickly.

“You’re even more stunning than I remember, ma chérie.”

vi — look what you made me do

You frown at him, your face upside down in his view. “That was unfair.”

“I have to be if I want to beat you.”

vii — all eyes on you, my magician

He doesn’t take his eyes off you, even once when his fingers reached out to fish out a champagne flute. Lyney still has that stupid smile on his face, the rim of his glass against his lips. You’re hit with the startling realization that you want to kiss him.

Fuck, what?

viii — you’ve ruined my life, by not being mine

“You’re so warm,” you murmur to his skin.

Goosebumps blossom all over his body. Your face brushes against the side of his neck. “Do you hate it?”

“I like it. My hands are cold. Every part of you is warm.”

ix — us traitors never win

Lyney knew that this would happen. He knew well enough to predict what ‘Father’ would make them do, but still—

“We understand,” Lynette says, her eyes darting down to Lyney’s clenched fists.

The Knave stares at Lyney, and the strength of her stare has Lyney lowering his eyes to the floor. “Do you?” she asks. They wisely stay silent: Lynette’s hesitance and Lyney’s frustration. “Then I trust this won’t happen any longer.”

x — king of my heart, body and soul

You bit back the bite of ice and wondered how ironic it was that every time your Vision acted out, it was, more often than not, tied to Lyney.

“What, so you expect me to believe you’d just go against your ‘Father’ like that?”

xi — baby can we dance, through an avalanche?

Lyney supposes he can’t hate Aether that much for that. And selfishly, Lyney supposes he can’t truly hate Aether because he brought you back to him. In a vague sense of camaraderie, Lyney understands.

xii — there is an indentation in the shape of you

And so you two stand face to face with your old home, the House of the Hearth. It still had the same grand doors you remember, the same living room, and the same fireplace, but the emptiness was unfamiliar. It was unsettling, like a bad dream.

This used to be your home.

xiii — he built a fire just to keep me warm

“I think it’s special. We’re twins, Lyney and I, but I think if I were in his body for even a day, I wouldn’t be able to recreate what you two have. He treasures you deeply, more than you know.”

xiv — hold on to the memories, and i will hold onto you

fin.

END NOTE.

thawed related tags you might want to check out:

#thawed fanart <3

#thawed memes i want to hang in a museum

of course, if you want to check out akagi's series of mind boggling fanart:

#akagi0021 carrying the entirety of thawed

FANART COMPILATION

our favorite akagi0021 has been blessing me with THAWED fanart (!!!) and i decided that i need to compile all of them for me and to make YOU see the art as well... BECAUSE THEY'RE ALL SO GOOD (with permission of course)

CH 1 | reader's new outfit reveal

CH 2 | lyney doesn’t know how he looks at reader

lyney and MC height difference before/after IM ON MY KNEES theyre so cute

CH 4 | aether and paimon confronting reader

bonus fanart of lyney and reader after training :(( so cute

CH 5 | lyney seeing reader!!!!!! aahhh his eyes

lyney as a kid and then lyney now (grown up) THIS ONE IS INSANE. little lyney is so adorable but then look at the lyney now

CH 6 | LOOK AT THIS ONE!! scene of lyney saying “she’s hiding something” except akagi made him unnecessarily sexy wtf

CH 7 | drunk reader driving lyney crazy... (i went crazy)

CH 8 | "lyney's not my boyfriend" ; the ending scene with childe, aether, and reader!! they all look so good T__T

CH 10 | lyney's "i would. i would for you" OUGH YESS

++ ADDITIONAL!!!

and look at this so so so adorable collection of doodles of chapter six by sunny @emanami !!! her artstyle is to live for its SO cute (look at the siblings!!!)

more of sunny's cute drawings: thawed!mc biting lyney's cheek like what i want to do

look at @lacrimae-lotos's version of mc!!!! SO CUTE look at her piercings and her eyes aahhhh

akagi's art dump from different chapters | theyre all so cutue im sobbing i love akagis mc and lyney so much T__T (LYNEY BRAIDING MC'S HAIR)

lyney doing the stretch tactic ohh he is so slick modern au with akagi's thawed!mc and lyney at the beach i fainted

++ LOOK AT AKAGI'S VERSION OF MC! shes so lovely

design headcanons (theyre all so precious)

akagi's reader as a genshin char !!

reader's outfit for chapter seven SO PRETTY

thawed!mc's eyepatch lore... aether is so silly

akagi's au where mc never left the house and they're enemies to lovers yes yes yes yesyse

#606: THAWED #genshin x reader #genshin impact x reader #genshin x you #genshin impact x you #genshin impact #x reader #lyney x reader #lyney x you #lyney x y/n #genshin impact series

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xzaddyzanakinx · 1 year ago

Text

| So, So, Right | final part

Stepbro! Anakin × innocent reader

18+ MDNI

Warnings: smut, inappropriate relationships, oral sex, public/semi-public, demeaning/condescending words toward reader, fingering, dom/sub dynamics, dd/lg dynamics (implied), daddy kink, unprotected PIV

Info: Modern AU, Anakin is whipped, Anakin literally worships the ground you walk on, reader is accidentally a brat, reader has oral fixation

NOT PROOFREAD

Those words tumbled out of Anakin’s mouth in a way you thought impossible, the possessive tone in his voice was almost enough to have you cum all over again. You buffered, unsure of how to answer, unsure if you could actually speak right now. All you could do was nod aggressively and hope that was answer enough for him.

He let loose a wicked smile, soaking in the powerful feeling from the way your body responded to him. Your eyes dilated beyond belief, your bottom lip tucked behind your top row of teeth, your hips rolling that tight little cunt against him.

“Alright, c’mon puppy don’t beg.” He chuckled, making fun of the way you struggled to tell him YES.

Achingly slow he plunged one thick finger back into your warm heat, sucking air through his teeth as if he were the one getting pleasured. Languidly thrusting before gently introducing another finger. You whimpered at the slight stretch, your legs involuntarily try to push you away from him. Once the weight of him settled into you he rocked his hand back and forth, watching every movement his hand made between your legs.

“This okay babydoll?” He looked up to you, mild concern on his face.

“Hurts Ani.” You whined, gasping as he put pressure against - that - spot deep within you.

“Gotta relax,” he whispered, lowering himself back between your legs.

You expected him to reintroduce his tongue to work in tandem with his fingers, but he didn’t. Instead he used his free hand to apply much needed friction on your clit with his calloused thumb. Immediately causing you to flutter around his fingers, drawing out a whimper from his throat.

“Patient, patient, - fuck -“ he moaned, feeling you clamp down harder this time, seemingly telling himself to have patience, not you.

“Feelin’ good aren’t you princess?” He asked, looking up at you from between your plush thighs.

“Uh huh.” You sniffled, bringing both hands up to hide your face. “Please, Ani I need more please.”

“Think you can take it baby girl?” He rose to his knees, dragging his fingers out of your cunt with a scissoring motion.

“I can! I can do it!” Your hands reach out to him, and he gladly takes both of them into his one large palm, lovingly squeezing them for your comfort.

“Just a little bit more, just one more,” when his fingers re-entered, he had added another.

Sucking air through your teeth you dug your nails into his palm. Fighting the urge to close your thighs around his hand, stopping him from completing his slow descent into your pussy.

“I know princess, I’m sorry.” He whined, coming down to hold you close to him.

Releasing your hands so he could pull you against his chest, securing you in place. One leg trapped between two of his to prevent you from squirming out of reach. Your whimpers made his cock throb against your abdomen, shooting a jolt of lightning straight to your cunt and giving you just a second of relief.

Anakin watched as your face flickered from hurt to pleasure, leaning in to lick your tears away. After giving you a moment to adjust he pumped his thick digits back and forth in your wet heat, lewd slick sounds echoing in the room along with your panting breath. He took note of the way you were sucking on your bottom lip, and wanted to give you a better option.

“Here, you just bite down on my shoulder.” He encouraged you, “need something to keep that mouth busy don’t you darlin’?”

You whined a soft “Yes.” Into the crook of his neck before sinking your teeth into the muscles flesh.

He groaned, bucking against your hip in search of friction. Anakin was in pain, not from your teeth, but from his weeping cock. Precum had leaked out continuously, leaving a wet spot on his checkered boxers. Without even looking he knew that his cock was an angry red, he wouldn’t last long when he finally was able to seat himself to the hilt inside the velvet walls of your perfect cunt.

Your whimpers had turned to pleasurable moans just moments ago, and Anakin’s selfish need for release made him ask for more.

“Baby?” He whispered making you release your death grip on his shoulder.

“Ani?” You questioned, furrowing your eyebrows when his fingertips brushed against a particularly sensitive area.

“Do you think you can take me?” His head dropping to your chest, nuzzling against your hardened nipple.

“I- I don’t know.” You responded, wrapping your arms around his shoulders.

“I can’t wait any more babydoll, s’hurting me.” He groaned, reluctantly breaking your embrace to kneel between your legs.

He kept up his movements to caress your gummy insides while pulling down his boxers, allowing his angry and swollen cock to slap against his stomach.

“Oh Ani-“ you gasped, he was huge, thick and veiny. “I can’t. It’s too much.”

His eyes flickered between his hand cupping your cunt and your shocked expression.

“I’ll be so gentle,” he cooed, “it’ll only hurt for minute.”

He lined himself up with your entrance, slowing his hand’s movement. You were torn between your need to please him, and self preservation, he was going to split you in half. But, he was your Ani, your favourite person in the world, if he said it’s gonna be okay, then it’ll be okay.

“Oh-okay, I can do it.” You nodded, hands gripping the sheets in preparation.

He traded his fingers for the very tip of his cock so quickly you’d think he would die if he waited much longer. The groan he let out was almost pained, his teeth clenched and his eyebrows knitted together, as if it were more painful for him than it was for you.

The creamy coating of your waiting cunt wet the head of his angry cock. You could not only feel the way each breath he took made his dick pulse, but you could also feel just how warm he was. A pant of guilt washed over you, knowing it was your fault he was hurting so badly.

“Deep breath dollface,” he warned, “just breathe.” Planting a caring kiss on your forehead as the tip breached your entrance.

His forearms resting on either side of you allowed you to claw at his biceps, holding on for dear life and he split you wide open. Tears flowed down your cheeks and you sniffled to keep more at bay.

“That’s my good girl,” whimpering encouragement for you. “Doing so good, so so good f’me babydoll.”

“Wa-wanna be good for you daddy.” You hiccuped.

“Fuckin’ shit.” His hips went slack for a second causing him to accidentally push deeper and quicker than he meant to.

You let out a choked sob that pulled at his heartstrings.

“So sorry darlin’, M’sorry.” He cooed, stilling his movement completely. He quickly cupped your burning hot cheek in his palm.

“Too much.” You cried.

“I know, I’m sorry.” He panted, clearly struggling to keep still. “Hold on, I’ll stop.”

He whimpered, trying to ease back out of your abused walls. Your left leg quickly hooking around his waist, holding him still. A look of pure confusion washed over Anakin, he wasn’t sure how to respond. Should he continue? Should he stop? He certainly didn’t want to hurt you, but it’s different if you’re - asking - him too.

“Jus’ try.” You whispered, “I can take it.”

He nodded, eagerly resuming his struggle to fully sheath himself in you, he was barely halfway. He left his position over you in favor of kneeling between your legs, knowing he’d be less likely to repeat his mistake this way. His eyes glued to the spot where his thick cock was being enveloped by your poor little cunt.

He left one hand to roam the expanse of your trembling body, the other hesitant to block his view of your body’s connection. He sighed, stilling again momentarily to spit on your red and puffy pussy. The act made you forget the pain for minute as your cunt contracted around him, a wave of slick coating his dick.

His thumb gently circled your clit, adding extra stimulation to make it easier for you. He was keeping completely still save for the involuntary twitch of his greedy cock.

“Gonna move now okay babydoll?” He whimpered, pulling his hips back.

“M’kay.” You sniffled, finding his hand that palmed at your tits so you could squeeze your small fingers around his.

Torturously slow Anakin drew his hips back and forth, fucking into you just halfway. What had felt like a terrible ripping of tissue began to fade into something pleasurable. Keening at his touch you made contact with his glassy eyes and nodded, silently telling him you were ready for more.

He sped up his ministrations on your sensitive bundle of nerves while gently pushing farther into your pussy. His thighs tense against the plush flesh of your own, while you no longer felt pain it seemed that Anakin was struggling to stay sane.

“So fuckin’ tight.” He whimpered, “I can’t.”

His hips stuttered and you watched in awe of the way he closed his eyes and held his breath, composing himself to the best of his ability before continuing. Applying pressure to your nub to distract you from the way he bullied his cock into your folds.

“Just a little more.” he said, almost chanting the words.

You whined at the burning stretch, your pussy fluttering in an attempt to push him out even though you so badly wanted him buried inside you.

“Fuck!” He stopped again, “don’t do that baby, shit.”

“M’sorry Ani.” You moaned.

“S’okay darlin’.” His head dropping so that his chin met his chest.

Your body arched into his touch, his fingers working double time to rub your clit. His cock throbbed within you, causing another involuntary clench of your pussy. Anakin sucked in a breath that sounded more like a hiss.

“Told you not to do that princess.” His voice was calm but spoke in a warning despite the tiny tremble of his lips.

“Sorry Ani, I can’t help it.” You whined, “I’m sorry, don’t stop again please.”

“Shh, shh stop.” He whined, his eyes clamped shut at the sudden pulsing of your walls, his face scrunched in a way that looked painful.

“I’m sorry!” You babbled, your cheeks hot and tear streaked, “M’sorry Daddy, so sorry.”

“God you’ve fuckin’- you,” he slurred, dropping from his kneeling position with both arms now securely under your body, holding you forcefully to his chest.

He groaned, mumbling to himself, his chest heaving with pained shallow breath. “Can’t say that to me right now darlin’ I can’t-“ he moaned again, cutting off his words as you arched into his touch.

“Please don’t stop, feels good now Ani.” You whined, “keep going Daddy please, I’ll be good.”

“Shit you’ve Fuckin’ done it now.” He groaned and you felt his muscles tense, both of his hands flying to your hips to squeeze in a grounding grip. “Gonna cum, I’m-“

He whined, sheathing fully into your abused cunt, “Shit. Good girl, good girl baby. God you’re just so tight, fuck.”

As rope after rope of sticky cum spilled into your throbbing pussy, he fucked his cum into you gently, barely moving at all while he babbled apologies into your neck.

“Oh,” you moaned, enjoying the way his hot seed coated your insides, “oh Ani, oh I love it.”

“What?” He choked out.

“More, I want more.” You whined, wrapping your legs around his hips. “Need your cum.”

The way his eyes widened with awe at your reaction told you he wasn’t at all expecting that to be your response to his little accident. His mouth descended on yours in an aggressive battle for more, more, more.

What was once tiny and tentative strokes gave way to faster, shallow thrusts. Anakin’s lips suctioned to the crook of your neck like he meant to rip your skin and dive into it. The longer he went on, the more pleasurable it became. The better it felt, the easier it was for you to relax and let loose, Anakin felt absolutely exhilarated watching you discover this new side of yourself.

“You like this?” He whispered, nipping your neck.

“Yes.” You trailed off, high pitched whines following as your nails dug into his shoulders.

“Talk to me baby, tell me what you want.” He growled.

“I want-wanna cum.” You whispered.

He grunted, bringing his hand to your chin. You blushed, gasping as he hit a particularly sensitive spot deep within you. “Fuck!” Hands palming his back sporadically as though you were trying not to drown.

“Language baby.” He panted, placing chaste kisses across your cheeks. “Not so innocent anymore are you?”

“Mmm-no.” You shook your head, starting to rock your hips to meet his.

“Look at you, cursing, asking for my cum-shit- wanting me to fuck you full of it huh?” Each thrust getting more aggressive.

“Please, Anakin, I do.”

“Such a fuckin’ dirty girl aren’t you?” He laughed.

“N-no I’m not.” You said, hiccuping.

“Say it.” He demanded, his gaze blazing into your own.

“But-but you said… you wanted me to be good.” You shook your head, confused.

“I know what I said.” He shot back, deepening his strokes. “So be a good girl and tell me how fucking nasty you are.”

“I-I’m dirty.” You whispered.

“Not good enough babydoll.”

“Ani!” You whined, embarrassment creeping in as you tried to hide your face.

He was quick to redirect your gaze back at him, “Don’t you look away from me.”

“M’sorry.” You whimpered, choking back a sob as he drilled into you at a new angle. His large hands splayed across your abdomen, pushing down on your lower stomach.

“See that?” He gripped the hair at the top of your head, forcing you to look at the space beneath his other hand.

“Uh huh.” You choked out.

“Touch it.” He said, not asking as he released your hair only to take your hand in his and press it into the softness of your lower stomach.

The movement of his cock deep within you could be felt from right there under your palm. The world seemed to fade farther and farther away with each time you felt his balls slap your ass.

“You like the way my cock feels don’t you?” He asked, taunting you.

“Y-yes.” You nodded, eyebrows knitted together as the bed shook.

“You like the way it feels when I fucked my cum in you?” He grinned.

“Yes!” You whined louder, pussy clenching down on him.

“You wanna cum on my cock and make me proud don’t you pretty girl?”

“Yes! Yes!” You nodded, the white hot coil in your stomach growing tighter and tighter with every demeaning syllable from his plump lips.

“So make Daddy proud, and tell me you’re a dirty little cumslut. Okay?” He growled.

“I’m-“ you sniffled, the humiliation so deliciously mean, “I’m a dirty cumsult.”

“See? Good girls listen, and good girls get what they want.” He laughed, bringing his fingers to your clit to furiously roll between his pointer finger and thumb.

Your back arched off the bed, hands tangling in his hair as you fought to breathe. Your vision blurring and the sounds of the room turning to white noise as lightening shot through you. A scream ripped from your throat, and you were too out of it to even comprehend that Anakin had shoved his fingers into your mouth to quiet you.

A hot liquid dribbled down your inner thighs, the next audible words you could hear were praises from Anakin.

“Oh look at you baby,” he cooed watching your bruised lips suck his fingers while your eyes rolled back in your head. “Taking Ani’s big cock so well.”

He moaned, rolling his hips against your mound, letting his dick soak up your cum.

“So proud of you princess, you did so good.” His voice soft and sweet as he brushed your hair from your face.

“Y’know I don’t mean those things right?” He whispered. “I just like to make you blush.” He nipped your nose.

“I k-know” you hiccuped.

“Did I hurt you too much?” He asked, still gently rocking into you.

“No Ani. It felt good.” You admit, wrapping your arms around his shoulders you felt his muscles twitch under your soft skin.

He laughed softly, catching your lips between his, whispering, “Want me to do it again?”

You blushed hiding your face in his neck, nodding against his sweaty skin. He held his hips flush to yours, rolling them in circles and creating a new sensation for you, his pubic hairs brushing over your clit every so often.

“Can I- um.” You giggled in his ear, “can I try?”

“You?” He pulled back, surprised you’d ask. “You want to try riding me?”

“Can I?” You asked sweetly.

“Where’d you learn that?” He squeaked, laughing. “I’m calling Ashley.”

“No!” You giggled, smacking his shoulders before leaning in to whisper, “I read it in Cosmo.”

He let out a gasp, “That’s it! I’m screening everything you read and watch from now on.”

EPILOGUE

“Look what I got in the mail!” You waved a thick envelope in front of Anakin’s face, watching him try not to choke on his lunch.

“Did you open it yet?” He mumbled through a mouth full of food.

“I was waiting for you,” you grinned, slipping your finger under the seam and ripping the envelope open.

You eagerly took out the papers, scanning them for the one line of words that could make or break your happy attitude.

“Oh my god.” A smile gripping your cheeks, “oh my god look! Look right here! I got in!”

You pointed to the acceptance letter and Anakin tossed aside your papers, leaning over the car console to tug you into his arms. He squeezed and peppered your cheeks with kisses, and as he pulled back you could’ve sworn you saw a little tear escape down his face.

“I’m so proud of you, see? I knew you’d get in.” He held his arms out as if he were presenting you to a crowd, “Now all we gotta do is find an apartment.”

He leaned in, catching your lips on a passionate kiss while his hands cupped your face.

You giggled as Anakin packed you across the threshold of your brand new apartment, a cute little shared space near his -and now your-college campus. He watched as you excitedly touched and inspected everything in sight.

Anakin had some of his lacrosse friends help him move everything in a few days prior. He had said ‘I’m not letting you sleep on a mattress on the floor. Don’t pout, I’ll have everything set up soon and then I’ll come get you okay doll face?’

No one knew of your less than normal step-sibling status here, you were free to do as you pleased. You didn’t have to worry about pop-ins from Obi-Wan or your mother seeing as how the campus was three hours away from your hometown. They didn’t even bat an eye when they were told you had switched schools and were planning on living together, they even seemed excited, glad that you would keep each other out of trouble.

Anakin came up behind you, snaking his arms around your waist and resting his chin atop your head. Swaying your body against his to a silent song, leaning down to plant a sloppy kiss on your exposed neck.

Anakin held both your hands in his, looking out over the pier he’d brought you to for a late afternoon date.

“Listen, I know things won’t always be easy. I know that it will be painful to pretend we’re something else when we visit back home.”

He turned back to you, “But most importantly, I know that I love you.”

He slowly lowered himself to one knee, pulling a tiny velvet box from his jacket pocket. A tearful grin on his sun kissed cheeks.

“We might never get a real wedding, but that’s not gonna stop me from asking,” he opened the box to reveal a teeny tiny pendant, one you’d seen before not so long ago.

“Will you marry me?”

Tears clouded your eyes as you vigorously agreed, throwing yourself down and into his arms.

You giggled as he placed the dainty necklace across your skin, fumbling with the little clasp on the chain. Once it was secured he pressed a small kiss to the nape of your neck.

“This was my moms wedding band. I had it melted down and re-shaped about a week or so after we met.” He blushed, embarrassed.

“It’s gorgeous.” You gasped, running your fingers over where it sat in the dip at the bottom of your throat.

“You’re gorgeous.” He whispered, pulling you into his chest.

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legal-poppy · 17 days ago

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how to study in (and survive) law school, from a 2L who almost failed both 1L semesters

you may be asking, "why would i want study advice from someone who clearly doesn't know how to study?" but that's the point- i'm a first-gen law student. aside from my siblings, nobody in my extended family has even been in grad school since the late 90s. i didn't know how to study last year, and definitely didn't know how to study for law school classes and exams. i ended my 1L year with 3 Cs and was placed in a remedial course last semester for the bottom 25% of students. i worked, changed, and tried different study methods throughout the semester, to figure out what works best for me and the classes i was taking. and it showed--i got an A and 3 Bs and my GPA jumped from a 2.5 to almost 2.8.

#1- do not try to do anything else during class. no social media, no reading, no shopping, no games. seriously. pay attention to your prof, your classmates, and what you did and didn't understand correctly from the reading. make corrections, note additional questions, read and re-read the book and your notes to make sure you can follow along with any questions or hypos.

#2- nothing is optional. do all of the extra readings, practice problems, and hypos. go to your prof for feedback on what you did well, what you didn't understand or apply correctly, and what you can do to write a better answer next time.

#3- go to your prof's office hours or ask questions after class. in high school and college i was told to never bug a teacher outside of class and never, ever go to their office hours. but law profs love when students ask questions and seek help. it doesn't have to be some profound theoretical question- my business law prof learned my name just from asking her about stories and problems my family had with businesses/services recently. my evidence prof learned my name because i kept asking her evidentiary questions about crime shows i was watching. in addition to the typical questions about a subject i was confused on or misunderstood, those fun questions helped me better understand and apply both the law and practical effect of the law to questions on the exam.

#4- start your outlines early and ask your prof for feedback. this was my biggest problem last year because i was paralyzed just figuring out how to format and organize my outlines. instead of going for pretty or aesthetic or perfectly detailed, just start writing. make a mess, write everywhere, scribble and erase and tape things together if you have to. it will still help you relearn and cement your understanding of those subjects. ask your prof if they would prefer to email your outline to look over ahead of time or just pop in for their office hours, and ask them if you got anything wrong, if you're too focused on the wrong details, or if there's anything you won't need to know for the exam. they won't judge if your outline is a mess, it just shows that you're trying and really want to get better.

when i studied for my evidence exam (my A last semester), i had so much trouble with my word doc that a week before the exam i just took my reading notes, my class notes, and my casebook, and spent days filling out an entire whiteboard with every bit of info on a rule. i ended up with 14 photos of that whiteboard completely covered with rules, advisory opinions, cases, and hypos. rather than wasting more time to type all of that up and send it to my prof, i sent her those photos. she knew i was struggling to stay organized on my traditional outline and saw how much better i was able to conceptualize the whole class without touching microsoft. i apologized for my horrible handwriting but all she did was send back notes on every single photo- what i had wrong, what i didn't need to know, and what i needed more detail/clarity on. no judgment for the incorrect parts or my handwriting or that i used a whiteboard, because it worked!

#5- revise your notes after every class. i didn't literally have time right after class, but every day when i went home i tried to revise my notes before i forgot what happened in class. i wasn't successful every single day and often spent a few hours on the weekend rewatching lectures and trying to remember details, but it was more effective than waiting until november to even start revising and outlining.

#6- don't follow the crowd. a lot of "gunners" and people with superiority complexes will tell you to follow their perfect notetaking format, study method, class structure, or reading style. and it might work great for them (or they're probably lying about how amazingly smart they are to look better than everyone else and make you feel worse about yourself), but they're very clearly a different person than you are because i hope you aren't trying to subtly wage psychological warfare on your stressed classmates. if you need a place to start, try to utilize those resources, but you can and should make adjustments if it isn't working for you. take a different class, join a different study group, use a different study supplement, do whatever is most helpful for you, and ignore anyone who suggests you're going to fail if you don't follow their instructions.

#7- don't listen to the noise. there's always someone with their superiority complex and intro-level psychology class and jedi mind tricks or whatever. they want to brag about how smart they are, what amazing grades they got, how easy the exam was that everyone else cried during, and that they got the best internship opportunity because of all of that. odds are, they're (1) lying and (2) exaggerating. they're probably struggling and stressing and crying just as much as you. or they're just not self-aware. you're never going to escape them too, unfortunately. but don't fall for their trap. don't study with them, don't sit by them, don't ask them for help unless you have exhausted every other person and resource in the building, take everything they say with a grain of salt and throw it over your shoulder to keep the demons away.

the other noise to avoid is the worriers who want to vent to everyone about how stressed, stupid, worried they are about the class or exam. and this isn't to say that you can't vent to your friends about it--that's your safety blanket people who will feel your stress and try to help you manage it. but if you see that person that you barely know and don't really talk to and they want to randomly start venting like that, take a step back. leave if you can, and if not, try to keep your head. don't stress because they're stressing, don't start second-guessing yourself, and don't share your own feelings of stress with them because they just want to see how miserable other people are so they can feel like they're doing better than you. if you're one of those people that everyone wants to vent to, do not do that for every person or repeat offenders who only seem to talk to you about their stress. take them to the dean, academic support staff, or on-campus counseling staff if they really need someone to talk to and help them. it's not your job to mother-duck your classmates so don't let them distract you from what you're there to do.

i had a classmate who caused drama with anyone who so much as looked at him the wrong way. accused people of cheating, violating the honor code, sleeping around for study help and good grades, or just being generally stupid. he wanted to seem so much smarter and better than those people (out of the 2 people i know who suffered his bullying, one was because she took too long to respond to his text and the other asked him too many questions about materials from a class). he just wouldn't shut up about how he was going to do way better than them and they were going to fail and drop out because they have no other career opportunities (pretty accurate paraphrase too). but to nobody's surprise, he ended that semester with a D, C and 2 Bs. no judgment to him for his grades because clearly i'm not much better, but very much judging for his attitude. people like him caused me to lose 20 lbs and half of my hair between April-September 2024 because i was so stressed about what he would think if he knew my grades or saw me in our remedial course, which he took in an earlier semester but also referred to as "the stupid class" full of students who couldn't care less about their futures. don't be like me, don't listen to anybody's judgment--focus on yourself and doing the best you can.

#8-the moment you start to feel anxious or panicked or spiraling down the drain, shut it down. talk to your professor, advisor, academic support center, dean of students, school counseling center, or even a friend--anyone that you know has your best interest at heart and will do what they can to help you. tell them that you're overwhelmed and stuck on something. law school staff, especially professors, do not judge students who reach this point. i almost cried in a prof's office because i was so worried about our mock court debate with actual lawyers and judges serving as our judges. my prof didn't judge or scold me for being so emotional at law school, she asked me why i was so worried and told me something she hadn't told the whole class: none of our mock judges actually knew anything about our assignment or the case law. they had no idea if we were misstating something or even found the right cases, they were only judging our presentation and advocacy. another professor, took me off of the cold-call list for an entire unit when i told her i was having a hard time reading the cases and didn't think i would be able to answer questions in class about them because of the personal experience i had with that topic. if you don't think a prof will listen to you or it's something more serious like accommodations or certain behaviors, you can talk to higher-ups like the dean/student services office/accommodations office for better help. those resources exist to help, so use them and don't feel bad for doing so.

#9- seek opportunities even if you don't meet the requirements. i got an interview with a federal office as a 1L, with my mediocre grades, because i applied. i didn't think they would be interested in me because i have no lawyer family members and am not the smartest candidate at our school, but i was one of 10 (TEN!!) 1L interviewees and ultimately got that (paid) internship last summer. they never even asked about my grades, but i did use it during my interview to show how hard i was working to do better and actually put in the work to do that. ignore the firms that say they only want the top 50% or 30% and apply if that's what you're interested in. if they don't want you because you don't have the grades they want, it's a sign that they're also not going to be accommodating when the bar exam comes, and you maybe didn't pass the first time, and they decide to fire you rather than hire you as a first-year associate after 6 more months of studying for the next bar date.

#10- take breaks every day and every week. personally, i take 30 minutes after back-to-back classes before i start studying, i stop studying at 6pm on the weekends unless i have a serious deadline, and i try to go out at least once a month with a non-lawyer friend to touch grass with the regular world and bring myself back into perspective. having law-school goggles on all the time throws everything out of whack. mountains and molehills and all of that. talk to regular people, let them slap you back into shape to see the whole puzzle of what lies beyond law school. and don't forget that you are more than your brain. go outside, take a walk, do some yoga, meditate, pet your goldfish. cry if you feel it and stress if it's stressful, but it's not the end of the world--no matter what happens.

good luck on the new semester, whether you've already been back for a while or are starting soon. be proud of yourself no matter what your grades look like when you get them. pause, evaluate, and set a plan to do better this semester.

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here-but-forgotten · 11 months ago

Text

you lost me. / valeria/wife!reader.

content notes — ex-wife!valeria. sweet alejandro. little shit rodolfo. mean valeria. plot heavy. el sin nombre foreshadowing. rudy weirdo rizz.

part one \ part two

A confident knock echos from the door through the walls, dancing around your ears as the noise registered, for you to finally walk to the door that had never been knocked before,

With a slender foggy window lending you a quick glimpse of the figure, you open the door, your eyes landing on a chest where you expected the eyes to be.

“Hello,” he starts, confident but still speaking volume, “Could I ask you some questions?”

You look up at him, blinking; not fully in a uniform but not in casual clothing. Lines around his eyes. Facial hair turning grey. Dark eyes. Intense eyes.

“Um,” You start, adverting your eyes from his, “Could I ask why first?”

He adjusts, halfway awkward, shifting his weight.

“That’s an understandable ask,” He answers, relaxing a little, “I’m Colonel Alejandro Vargas, I wanted to ask you some questions related to Valeria Garza.”

You pause, blinking.

“Your last name is what?”

“Vargas.”

You stifle an insecure giggle,

“I thought you said ‘Vergas’—“

“No—“ Alejandro cuts you off, letting a small smile escape from him, holding in a laugh, “no, God didn’t curse me with that.”

You let yourself giggle, covering your mouth and turning a bit away as he lets out the chuckle he held in, laughing with you.

“Sorry,” You laugh a little, finally taking a breath, “What are you asking about?”

He pulls his demeanor together, a bit more serious,

“If I have been told correctly, you are who she claimed to be her wife, yes?”

“At one time I was, yes,” You shift, “Not anymore.”

“Did she leave any sort of technology here?”

You tilt your head a bit, looking up at him.

“She did. Is that a problem?”

Alejandro sighs at your inquisition.

“I have some reason to believe she took something that could track her location with her when she has done work for me. If she did, there is a lot someone could gain from that if they did track it.”

You look aside, thinking about that damned dinged up phone.

“Would it be a threat to me?”

“I would say, without much other info, that yes it could be a threat to you.”

You don’t respond.

“I don’t know you, but I do know what has recently happened,” He starts, “If someone could track it, she could track it, and could track you.”

“Do you want me to give it to you?”

“If you are able, yes.”

You turn, leaving the door open,

“You.. You can come in, if you’d like.”

You move, his footsteps following you briefly and stopping as you walked further into the home, finding the half-held together phone that she left that you had kept in what used to be her bedside table. You stop, looking at the bed; the new sheets on it looked nice, it finally looked comfy, like somewhere safe. And theres a small pang in your chest, that the person who used to make it warm was gone, the person who was why the bed wasn’t just a humble full size, but,

it was for the best, and you told your chest that everyday.

You deserve someone who gives you the time of day, who makes time for you, even if they’re busy.

And you turn on your toes, walking back to the entrance way that the Colonel sat at—

Colonel Alejandro Vargas.

Col. A. Vargas

CAV.

“Do you think, by any chance, that you were contacting her with this phone?”

You look to him— his hip leaned against the counter with his arms casually crossed, his eyes gentle but alert, his expression once relaxed turned into his eyebrow raised.

“It is a possibility,” He murmurs, “It seems like the two of us learned a lot recently.”

“Valeria?”

“No, you and I.”

His stare is unwavering, not so assertive but ever confident, making you shift on your feet as he watched you.

“Yeah. It would seem like the two of us have.”

He lets out a small hum in response, eyeing the phone being held together by tape and faith.

“I’ve seen that one before,” He says, lowly, to himself more than you.

“She has a lot of phones.”

“Is that so?” he asks, watching you.

“Yeah, she probably had 5, at my guess now,” You shift, “But I know that you guys sometimes have a lot of phones—“

“2. We normally have 2.”

His gaze is a bit intense, not directed at you, yet it still sent a small shake through your body; there was a certain charm, yet that didn’t stop the intensity of his thoughts.

Silently, you offer the phone to him, looking up to him, soft blinks trying to pull him from his thoughts.

“Thank you,” Alejandro says after a moment in his thoughts, delicately taking the phone from your outstretched hand, fingers brushing yours softly; his touch is hot, like he was running on coals—

“Did she ever introduce you to any military personnel?”

“No.”

He raises his eyebrow at that.

“None?”

“No. I only found out about you from her accidentally saying something.”

Theres a type of pity in his gaze, maybe even guilt.

“Does she have any sort of surveillance on this property?”

“No. I don’t think she would come back for it anyway. Frankly, she hasn’t been back since she left.”

“When was that?”

“A week or so now.”

“Did she introduce you to.. anyone?”

“Not really.”

“Did that not concern you at all?”

His tone is gentle, lacking any judgement.

“It should have. But love makes you dumb sometimes.”

He tilts his head in an agreement, glancing down at the phone.

“Have you entered this phone or deleted anything off of it?”

“I’ve looked around it, but I haven’t deleted anything. It’s all as I found it.”

Alejandro nods, glancing off to the side for a moment, letting you watch his face; his hair isn’t really “done”, only combed back with fingers, some curls breaking free from pomade, curling around his ear.

“I’m sorry you had to go through all of that,” he says after a moment.

“I’m sure you’ve gone through worse.”

“I chose to go through worse. But you didn’t.”

You watch him, his words full of soft mercy.

“I suppose I didn’t, but I made it.”

He nods again, looking back to you.

“I’m going to leave you a number. You call it if you ever need something. Especially if she comes back to give you a hard time,” He explains, back to his colonel voice— you assume— not leaving much room for discussion.

You watch him, his movements are confident, leaving a small writing pad with the top sheet scribbled on, a phone number, a title— “los vaqueros”

“The cowboys?” You ask tentatively, looking up at him.

God he’s big.

Shush.

“I don’t have time to explain all of that,” He says, a bit affectionately, a little smile, “But if you need something, you call this without hesitation, okay?”

“What if it’s stupid?”

His eyes are a bit soft.

“It won’t be.”

His eyes leave you, looking at the counter, noticing the little shine on the countertop— still where Valeria left it.

“Did she really walk out and just leave her ring?”

You don’t look at it.

“Yeah.”

He rolls his eyes.

“She’s a walking headache.”

“She’s a charming walking headache.”

“I’m aware,” he grumbles shortly, not irritated at you.

“I,” you start, grabbing his attention immediately, “I don’t know what happened with you, really, but I’m sorry you had to deal with that.”

“She’s not your problem to apologize for anymore.”

“I know, but it still sucks to go through something like that, no matter who did it.”

His gaze is soft.

“You’re a very sweet woman.”

His eyes glance away from you, a bit awkwardly,

“I have one… thing to tell you, but it’s not fun.”

You pull a deep breath through your chest, crossing your arms over your chest,

“Rip the bandage off.”

Alejandro shifts, leaning against the counter, mimicking your crossed arms,

“She had that marriage license nullified, somehow, a while ago now. Maybe half a year.”

The news should rock you, pull through your bones, crush your soul a bit— but it’s hard to be disappointed by something you have no faith in.

You stand for a moment, letting the words set in, waiting for your stomach to fall, to crumble your very being up into a useless little paper ball, but it doesn’t come. Your head isn’t light. Your feet are grounded. Nothing sways your balance.

“I can’t say I’m surprised,” You finally say, not looking at him.

Alejandro is quiet for a moment, tense.

“You’ve already told me to not apologize, but,” He pauses, shifting his weight to one of his feet, “That’s why I didn’t fight back, when she approached me. She told me it was long done.”

“You can’t control her bullshit.”

That pulls a laugh out of him, from deep in his chest, releasing the tension he held.

“Yeah, I guess I can’t.”

He shifts again.

“What’s more frustrating is there is other— falsified— paperwork that now says you’re dead.”

You shift, uncomfortably.

“So now there are documents that don’t line up. On one, you two have divorced— in the United States— and on another you’ve been dead.”

“What would she gain from lying about all of that?”

He sighs.

“I have no clue. I cannot, within my position, just assume things based out of interpersonal actions; however, I don’t think anything innocent would come out of that.”

“She didn’t falsify a death certificate, did she?”

“No. That’s what tipped all of this off.”

You finally move a bit, letting your body relax.

“Something is up with her. I have no idea what.”

Alejandro is lost in thought for a moment, staring at the opposite wall; you watch him, the gears turning in his head with a focused but somewhat serene expression, eyes slightly moving as the follows his thoughts—

“I should be going now. Please, use that number. There are dangers she could have exposed you to without you knowing,” Alejandro murmurs, walking to the door, you silently following him. You grasp the door knob as he enters the door way, your hand gently touching his back— the touch making him jump a little.

“Thank you,” You murmur, your touch leaving him resting your hand on the door, meeting your eyes over his shoulder.

“Of course.”

You close the door, watching his figure walk to a jeep— confident stride, nice body hidden under military clothes, gentle eyes—

Don’t you dare.

You breathe deep, moving back into the home, the sunlight twinkling in through the curtains, warm sunset light dancing like little figures, warming up the light in the room. His voice— his words— rattle around your head, her antics annoying you more than they were able to hurt you—

This has been long dead. It has been dead, since she seems to have officially killed it, but now the dead weight had been removed, like matted hair that couldn’t be saved. It’s been shaved off; it wasn’t fun, but now it’s better. You are better. You are growing back. You are lighter. You are able to breathe.

You turn on your toes, walking back to the counter to look at the pad with the number written on it; his handwriting, or whoever wrote this, isn’t bad but it’s not pretty. A bit slanted. Legible. You take the pad in your hand, feeling over the writing— written with a ballpoint pen— before pulling out your own phone, entering it under a quick little new contact, marking it LV.

If she gets to have cryptic contacts, I do too.

You place it back down, looking into the greater house, warmth flooding in the sunlight.

You think it should hurt more— something so momentous ending— yet it also makes sense. It died slowly. There is no cruel, fast pain in a slow death. There is slow pain, the type that slowly makes your joints go still, where your chests twists and breaks, piece by piece, like peeling off old paint. It wasn’t a quick death. There was no quick cut, no guillotine, no bullet, no knife. It was a slow poison. It was terminal. When you realize it’s dying, it hurts. You wonder what you did wrong. You blame every piece that you didn’t do on yourself, just to try to rationalize it. To try to make it make sense. But sometimes, death comes, and sometimes it is slow, and sometimes it is quick, but death has to happen. It has to. Death allows for rot. Rot allows for growth. Growth is new life. There is no new life without the rot that death provides. But there is still no less hopeless ending than death, if you are not looking for the new buds of flowers.

You breathe, escaping your thoughts for a moment, looking out the windows, sun pungent and powerful.

And it should hurt more, that instead of even growing up and coming to you to say she wanted it to end, that she decided to do it on her own, to cheat with two people, to just use you as a housekeeper until she came back, just to be a bedwarmer. But at this point, it wasn’t anything new. It was the first infidelity— that you knew of— and it was two cases of it, yet it wasn’t surprising. Disappointing, but not surprising. Disappointing as a situation, not disappointing for her. Theres a few sentences, a few conversations that haunt you, between you and her, still; when her attention was on you, she still spilled her rotten blood onto you, almost to temper you into it—

Things about her impatience with partner, things about how she really didn’t like talking about her feelings, how she found relationships as a distraction. How she never admitted her feelings, she just let them die. How she knew that work would always mean more to her than a relationship. And how she tried to shroud it in telling you how you were the exception— you were the one she would put work behind for, the one she’d admit her feelings for, the one she’d stay loyal for. Exceptions to a rule are delicate. And sometimes, they’re just a lie. And how she had no hand in picking out the house, she let you pick it out, like a dog picking their favorite kennel.

Your eyes leave the sun light, blinking the haze away as you notice movement outside, grabbing the notepad quickly— throwing it in a drawer quickly— and striding to the door, an all too familiar figure standing, not moving.

Moving away from the door, you tap the newly formed contact, moving to the bedroom as the phone rang against your ear.

“¿Hola?”

It wasn’t Alejandro.

“Um, hello,” You awkwardly start, the other person breathing a sharp breath, “Colonel Ve-Vargas gave me this number in case I needed something.”

There is a pause.

“Oh. You.”

Pause.

“Is something wrong?”

“Valeria Garza is back, and she has a man with her.”

Pause.

“Do not answer the door, and keep away from it. Hang tight. Understand?”

“Yes, sir,” you say in a softer voice, the other’s breath hitching at that.

“Do you want me to stay on the phone with you?”

“You don’t have to.”

“Then you’ll see me soon.”

Click.

Ominous.

His voice wasn’t Alejandro’s, something a bit more smooth about his delivery, ever slightly colder.

And so you moved to the bedroom door, silently closing and locking it, watching the covered windows for any movement. You sit on the floor beside the bed, as to not have your silhouette in the window, watching. Waiting. There is a soft distant noise of talking, Spanish, a bit rushed and irritated. Her Spanish. Romance languages can be many things, but she fully embraced the Roman cruelty in her words. Footsteps. Around the windows, tracing the house. Only two pairs of footsteps.

Until.

A bit of irritated shouting, from the door, following the footsteps around the house. You move along the floor, against the wall closest to the window, trying to listen—

“— do you think you’re doing?”

“do not lecture me—“

“go back to the cars. now.”

The same slightly grumpy voice, and hers.

You follow the trail, standing in the kitchen, keeping an ear out.

“I own this property—“

“Valeria, I cannot tell you how little of a shit I give. You directly disobeyed an order.”

“It was an overreach!”

“Don’t care.”

“Rodolfo—“

“That’s Sergeant Major to you.”

“I am going to stab you.”

“You won’t.”

Pause.

“I just want to talk to her.”

“Leave your gun then.”

“But—“

“I’m impressed you got someone who wanted to spend the rest of their life dealing with you.”

Pause.

“Leave the gun and I’ll let you speak to her.”

“What are you, my father?”

“If I was your father, you wouldn’t act like a fucking brat.”

Pause.

“I really want to kill you sometimes.”

“The feeling is mutual.”

Knock knock.

You move to the door, peering to see a male figure standing outside of the door. You slowly open the door.

“hello?”

“Neña—“

“Shut up. I’m the one who spoke to you on the phone,” He cuts her off, “Do you want to speak to her or do you want her gone?”

“I can speak to her. I would appreciate if you stayed though,” You respond calmly, sweetly, looking up at him, his gaze gentle on you.

“I wanted to speak to you alone,” Valeria starts, her voice scarily gentle, keeping her tone even.

“I don’t want that.” You say firmly, the man standing between you and her. Another man hangs behind, looking like a dog with his tail between his legs.

The man nods, staying where he was, but moving a bit to let you see Valeria.

“Do you not trust me anymore?” Valeria asks softly, her gaze soft. A trap.

“Do you think I’m that stupid?”

He snorts.

“I know I’ve messed up, but I miss you.”

“Okay.”

He cracks a small smirk, turning his gaze away from the two of you.

“I didn’t mean to leave you behind.”

“You can accidentally hit someone with your car and it’s still manslaughter.”

She rolls her eyes, her façade dropping for a moment, only to recompose herself.

“Can I come inside?”

You look at the man, his gaze both interested and bored, his eyes meeting yours for a moment. You move, pulling his forearm inside the house, his body moving stiffly at the movement, following you. Valeria shoots you a glare, following. The other man stands outside.

“Lovely, I really never noticed how bad we had gotten,” Valeria says, reaching for you as you move back, the man standing beside you, becoming a silent comforting presence, “But I don’t want it to be over.”

“I gave you as much as I could, and that wasn’t enough. So how would now be any different?”

“I can change.”

“Just between you and me,” He interjects, leaning towards you, inches from your ear, “She’s been a bitch since she was 8 and couldn’t find the tooth she had lost.”

You giggle.

“This has nothing to do with you,” She sneers, glaring up at him. He only shrugs with a slight smile.

“This is exhausting, you know,” you say, pulled together, calm, “you can’t start caring about something once it’s dead.”

“It’s not dead, it just needs to be restarted.”

You blink.

“Valeria, we’ve been dead for months.”

“We haven’t—“

“What about that marriage certificate mess?”

She pauses.

“It was for your own good, I don’t want someone finding you because of me.”

The mans head tilts a bit in your peripheral vision.

“Aside from us not legally being one anymore, you barely gave me the time of day. I could be right in front of you and you would ignore me. I was here the entire time, like a fucking little kid, waiting on you, only for you to never give me anything in return.”

“Relationships aren’t transactional,” She says, bitter. Thick with bitter. Patience running thin.

“No, they aren’t. But they do take work on both sides to work. And I can’t carry the weight of two.”

Valeria is quiet.

“I wish you had left me wandering about you, it would have saved me a lot of heartache,” you pause, “You made me feel like I was your world, then you ripped it away the minute I accepted that.”

“You like accusing me of a lot,” She snaps, the sweet glaze finally washed away, “I gave you everything I could.”

“‘Everything I could’ is disingenuous if you had to divide it three ways.”

Valeria sighs, deep, angry,

“If you would just fucking shut up for once and let me talk you would act right!” Her voice booms, flinch taking your gaze away, your head light as your thoughts block themselves out. You stand spinning, feet still but disoriented, and all of a sudden, you were small again. You were just polishing dishes to make her happy. You were throwing out that perfume you loved and she hated. You were waiting up until you fell asleep on the couch, only to wake up alone with dirty dishes to clean. You are small again.

“Garza.”

His voice cuts through the haze, confident, unwavering. His touch rests on your shoulder blade, weighing you back down on the uncomfortable reality.

“This doesn’t fucking include you.”

He sighs, his fingers gently rubbing your back, warmth seeping through your clothes.

“Could you act grown for once?”

Valeria is quiet.

“Your picket-fence has been sharp as knives. You never loved me. You wanted to collect the hearts you took.”

“I hate how you make me out to be the bad guy.”

“Valeria, I am tired of you. I am so very tired. You owe me so much sleep.”

“Why do you want to give up on us?”

You sigh. The two of you would just talk in circles until one of you died from exhaustion.

“Valeria, I could give you my heart and you would forget you had it. I could tell you time and time again the extent of my love and you would find no worth in it. I could drop everything to make a little piece of your life easier and it isn’t enough for you.”

“You were enough.”

“You say that like a faithless prayer. If I ever was enough you wouldn’t run to other people. If I was enough you wouldn’t have attacked me over a simple question. You wouldn’t assume that I was the thing that always hurt you. You wouldn’t only think of me first when something went wrong. And it doesn’t matter what I tell you, because I know you won’t believe me.”

“Why wouldn’t I believe you?”

“You haven’t believed me before,” You hesitate, the mans presence beside you evident, vulnerable, “I held out every night for you. I thought you’d notice me— not my body, not my wit, not my helpfulness— but me. And that never happened. I told you I felt bad, and I ripped my heart apart to try to get you to care, and the only thing you did with it was turn it against me. You told me I could lean on you then guilted me when I was too heavy.”

You shift, swallowing thick, trying to soothe your constraining throat,

“I remember when you acted like you loved me. You acted like I was your favorite toy, like I was the one you’d keep on your bed, the one you’d put in pretty dresses and kiss before bed. Then the minute— the fucking second— I thought you would be gentle with me, you ripped it all away. I sought after you day after day after day and I got nothing. And now I know, you had the chance to. I just wasn’t your priority.”

She stares. Your eyes tingle.

“I kept convincing myself the more attention and love I gave you, the more I’d receive. That when you didn’t reciprocate, you were just in a bad space. But it’s been years. There hasn’t been a day where I could just talk to you. And I’ve learned now you were spending them with other people. I’ve learned I’m the thing you keep in your back pocket when no one else will talk to you. I’ve learned that I’m the pretty toy you show off that you got just to throw me under your bed. I cannot imagine that you love me when I have never been what you wanted. Bad times come, but bad times don’t mean you run away from love. You go towards it. And you found it else where.”

You swollow again, choking on your own throat,

“I’ve been the stupid schoolgirl chasing someone who never looked me in the eye this entire time. And I feel stupid for it now, but I choose now to break out of it. You never claimed you love me so until we were dead and gone. You can’t dig up the corpse to hold it.”

There is silence. Your heartbeat. Your breathing. Valeria’s eyes burning into you.

“You kept me like a secret but I kept you like an oath.”

Valeria sighs.

Valeria is quiet.

Her eyes don’t meet yours.

“Go back to base, Garza. Before anymore actions are taken over this.”

“You don’t get to be in charge of me—“

“I am. Go back.”

He stands, she stands, finally moving from her place, shooting a glare over her shoulder as she slammed the door behind her, the same pots hitting the wall in her wake. A car door slamming in the same manner. Ignition. The sound leaving in the distance.

You stood, crossing your arms over yourself.

Breathe in, breathe through, breathe deep, breathe out.

The man beside you awkwardly shifts.

“I never got your name,” You say, a little croak in your voice.

“Rodolfo. Sergeant Major Rodolfo Parra.”

You nod to yourself.

“Thank you.”

He hums a quiet response, relaxing his frame.

“I haven’t seen many to go toe to toe with her.”

“Is that a good thing?”

“I would say so,” Rodolfo glances past you, “She’s always had an assertiveness to her, but it devolves into brattiness if pushed enough.”

Quiet.

“Did you two have fights like that before?”

“We’ve had a couple. I joked I would call them the Great Wars. But now I just feel maimed.”

“If I had known about you earlier, I would have warned you earlier,” his voice is soft.

“Have you known her for long?”

“Yeah, grew up in the same area. I vomited on her at her quinceañera.”

“That was you?” You ask with a soft giggle, the noise pulling a soft smile from him.

“Did she still complain about it?”

“Yeah, yeah she did. I thought it was a little silly to still be mad about.”

“I did her a favor. I got her to take off that god-awful dress without having to seduce her.”

“I take it she’s never been able to charm you?”

“No.”

You laugh at that dry response, a comfortable little smile resting on his face, looking down at you with a certain gentleness.

“I don’t handle brats very well.”

You shoot him a curious look.

“Not right now.”

You glance away.

Quiet.

“Thank you for.. all of that.”

He nods.

“I would suggest you try to leave this place. She knows the location too well.”

“I…” You start, his eyes heavy on you, “It’s embarrassing, I don’t really have a way to do that.”

“Did she emotionally trap you to believe that she would be your sole provider while using that to control you in the way she wanted so you were pushed out of any career or financial independence?”

You pause.

“Yeah I guess, sergeant therapist.”

He snickers.

He stops, thinking over your words.

“If you would like, I can set you up living accommodations. No obligation to pay me back in anyway. No obligation to stay. How does that sound?”

“If you weren’t a pretty sergeant I’d say you were trying to kidnap me.”

He shifts a bit at that, flushing a little—

Is that blush?

“Well, If I did that, I’d have Alejandro down my throat. And it’s Sergeant Major.”

“Oh, you two are like that?”

He shoots you a glare.

“You have a dirty mind.”

You giggle, his face having another little smile break out.

“no, we are not,” he says with a head shake like a disappointed father.

You think, not fully clear, but the thought of Valeria randomly popping back up evident. You wouldn’t have to hear the door slam again. The walls rattling because you didn’t win the word game, or because you did. You could do your own dishes. You could strip her from you finally, pulling out the turpentine and mineral spirits, wiping yourself clean with Ivory.

“I think we could work something out like that,” you say softly, sweetly, looking up at him properly. Two moles. Soft eyes. Longer nose than Alejandro.

“You can call me Rudy, if you’d like.”

#valeria garza #valeria call of duty #valeria garza x fem!reader #valeria garza x reader #valeria garza x you #angst #emotional manipulation #alejandro vargas #rodolfo rudy parra #cod #call of duty #cod mw2 #tolerate it.#a kiss of weird rudy rizz

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thehighladywrites · 1 year ago

Text

— “Let’s try something new.”

pairing: professor eris x reader, feyre makes an appearance

summary: Eris surprises you with a little surprise before your exam. After a fun session you insist on going home, so your friends won’t see you. But what happens when he’s nowhere near?

warnings: 18+, nsfw, smutty scenes, fem reader, professor x student relationship, both are obviously of age,semi public sex, remote controlled vibrator, eris both slightly degrading and praising (love that),kidnapping oop👀

amara’s note: this is kind of a wild one, we also get new info of eris’s background👀 this is especially dedicated for all the eris haters and antis💗 if u find any typos, your eyes are deceiving you. Also yes I know reader getting kidnapped is SO 2014 wattpad y/n with her orbs getting sold to a mafia boss coded but it’s for the plottttt🫡🫡

part 1 part 2 part 2,5 part 3

The sound of the loud fan and random coughs echoed through the silent lecture hall, the only sounds where the clicking of mechanical pens and the rustle of turning paper.

The literature exam wasn’t really something you were worrying about since you were dating eris so you just sat there looking pretty, thinking of ways to have fun with him later on. Life really was more beautiful when you didn’t have to worry about stuff like exams and hard work.

Eris always taught you the night after anyways. And it was much more fun being in his bed as he’s teaching you things, giving you rewards if you answer correctly and punishments if you answered incorrectly.

Your thighs clenched at the idea and you subtly bit your thumb at the thought of tonight.

You felt a zap in your lower stomach, clenching your legs even harder as you remembered that you had a vibrator in you. That’s right, you nearly forgot about the way Eris had slutted you out on his desk before asking if you wanted to try something new today.

He had pulled out an oval shaped, bright pink little vibrator. It was shapes like a U so that it was nestled deep against your g-spot while stimulating the clit at the same time.

At first you were a bit embarrassed at the way he just casually put it in your palm for you to examine. His eyes had darken at the way your cheeks had heated. The goosepumps, indicating your excitement, almost made him pounce on you again.

“It’s not very big. You sure this will feel nice?”

He smiles, gently pushing your hair behind your ear before planting a soft kiss on your plush lips.

“I assure you, you will feel pleasure.”

You decided to be petty, stirring the pot a little.

“Interesting. And how exactly do you know that this feels nice? Have you tested it on other girls?”

His lips twitch in a smirk.

“I’ve tested it on myself.”

Your eyes widen at his casual answer. Eris in bed playing with himself sounded like grade A masturbation material, holy fuck.

His smirk only widened at your shocked face.

“Why deprive myself of such pleasure?”

You nodded, your mind feeling a bit fuzzy.

“Uh-huh. You really shouldn't. And neither should I. So, please put it in me.”

“Open your mouth, sweetheart.”

You obey, lolling out your tounge as he puts the toy in your mouth for you to wet.

You hop of his desk and turn around, bending over as you push your skirt up. His hand massages your ass before slapping it, enjoying the way you yelp.

Eris glances down at his F.P. Journe, clicking his tongue at the amount of time remaining before his hall fills with bothersome students.

He can’t wait for the day you graduate and he can finally leave this fucking place. There’s really nothing keeping him here anymore except you. He finally found a legal business he can use as a front so there was really no need to keep playing professor.

It really fucking irked him that teaching a bunch of hormornal idiots was the job his father had decided to use as a front for the business. But money had to come legally from somewhere right?

Convincing people that the mansion was an ancient family estate passed down through generations proved ridiculously easy. Despite the entire place being new, the idiots didn't bother checking the details.

You wiggle a bit, trying to get him out of his thoughts before the doors infront of you opened. Eris quickly put the toy in with a grin, not surprised by how easy it slid in considering how many times he had you finishing on his tounge.

You rise and shift your weight between your feet, ensuring everything feels just right.

“Oh, i just feel light pressure. Will people hear it?”

“No, not at all. Do you want to try it out before you sit down?”

You nod then almost fall to your knees at the strong vibrations. Letting out a sharp gasp you grab onto his shirt, curling your fist in his shirt.

“How do you feel, my love?”

You take a step closer, resting your head on his steady, beating heart.

“Good. I feel really fucking good.”

Once again, he slaps your ass and this time it feels so much better.

“Mind your language.”

Grabbing his shoulders, you jerk him down and kiss him hard, licking and biting his lips before grabbing your bag and using the side entrance to leave the hall, only to come in with the other students through the big doors.

—

Class started 5 minutes late because Eris needed his hard on to calm down. He was for sure getting you back for it. So when he opened the doors, he told everyone you had assigned seats because of the exams when in reality, he wanted you to have the last row to yourself. There was no one sitting in the back except for you so there was plenty of room for some fun.

The test, a multi-page character analysis and study on one of the course books, was handed to you by Eris along with a few extra pens to occupy yourself. But you still tried your best. He was still your professor and you really wanted to show him that you belonged in his class, you wanted to make him proud of you.

All that flew out of your mind when he started the toy, making your whole body tense before relaxing.

Eris started explaining everything to the class and asked if anyone had any questions before starting.

Then the bastard looked dead into your eyes and asked while he upped the speed,

“Any questions in the back?”

You clenched your legs together and gripped your pen so hard it started to crack,

“No professor.”

He nodded, a ghost of a smile on his and told everyone to start.

Seated, you struggled to answer the questions, constantly distracted by him and the pesky remote tucked in his slacks. Squirming in your seat, your face warmed, attempting to swallow with a dry throat.

It felt so good, having every part of you stimulated. Your entire body was always on edge, goosebumps and heat flaring your body. The onlu thing you hated was that during these two hours of pure ecstasy, he didn’t let you cum once. You were only brought to the knife sharp edge and had pleasure taken away. You considered just fixing it yourself had it not been for your nerves and the other students there.

Finally the exam ended and everyone left to discuss their answers at the cafeteria but you stayed put in your chair, convinced that if you moved, there would be a big stain. When the last student left and Eris locked the doors, you stood up, grabbed your things and tried to leave the room. If he didn’t allow you to cum then you wouldn’t allow him to touch you.

Seated in his chair, he observed your every move until you reached the door. Just as you were about to leave, he pressed the highest setting, causing your knees to wobble.

“Tell me, dear. Why are you so angry at me?”

He approached, crouching beside you, gently tucking a strand of hair behind your ear.

Okay, maybe he could touch you.

“I’m- wait, it’s too much, Er, please.”

Eris looked at you with mock sympathy and simply went on.

“Did you want to cum? Is that it, hm? My beautiful girl is angry because I didn’t let her cum in a classroom full of others? Are you truly that needy?”

His words mixed with the intensity of the vibrations had you seeing white. You came with a cry, head thrown back and hands grabbing his forearms in a steel grip.

“May I have some more?” you asked with a smile. In response, he mirrored your smile and gladly fulfilled your request.

—

After spending time with Eris in his office, he offered to drive you home, but you opted to walk to avoid being seen by friends at a nearby party.

You should have just let him fucking drive you home

The crisp autumn evening turned unexpectedly traumatic as you strolled home with your AirPods in. An eerie sensation of being followed grew, fueled by a black sedan trailing a few feet away. Heightened paranoia set in, prompting you to quicken your pace.

The car halted, and a tall, red-headed man emerged, his footsteps thudded against the dark sidewalk behind you. As he approached, tension heightened until an unsettling silence fell. Your fight-or-flight instincts peaked, and you turned to confront him, only to find no one there.

Annoyed and frightened, you turned around, only to encounter a wall of muscles but before you could scream, everything went black.

—

Feyre’s pov:

“The number you have dialed is not available right now-”

She tosses her phone onto the couch, wondering where you are. The plan was to get ready together before heading to the party she insisted on attending. She was informed if TA Rhysand's presence, and she couldn't resist checking it out.

She was starting to wonder where you were. You mentioned being ‘busy’with Eris after class, but this was dragging on. Maybe you just decided to bail, but it's odd since you're usually stuck to your phone, and she didn't get a text or anything.

Feyre got a bad feeling in her stomach and decided to pay Eris a visit. She knew it wasn't really appropriate to show up at his place, but that gut feeling wouldn't let go.

And if you were at his house, she’d simply murder you for ignoring her.

You had given her Eris' address a few weeks back, just in case she needed to get in touch with you urgently. Now, she really hoped this wasn't turning into an emergency.

She rolled up to Eris's place, this big gate in the way. Hit the intercom button, started talking.

“Hi professor, it’s me, Feyre Archeron in your AP lit class. Listen, I know this might be inappropriate or whatever but is Y/N in there? I just really need to know since she’s not answering her phone and I haven’t seen her since the exam. If she’s there it’s fine and I understand and I will get outta here but-”

Eris buzzes her in and bolts out to the courtyard before Feyre can even ask about his fancy estate.

Feyre's eyebrows furrow as only Eris appears.

“ Wait, where is she?” she questions.

Eris looks at her with panic, revealing that you left nearly an hour ago.

“Well, if she isn't here, then where the hell is she? Do you think something happened?” Feyre demands.

Eris's eyes harden, jaw clenching.

“Trust me, I'll find out,” he grits out before instructing Feyre to come inside.

🏷️ taglist: @danikamariewrites @daycourtofficial @teenageeggscissorslawyer @jeannineee @natashachelsea @candyjaypoppins @honeysuckle-daydreams13 @acourtofbatboydreams @nocasdatsgay @cyrygher @amara-moonlight @fell-in-luvs @hanitastic @culiehua @daughterofthemoons-stuff @itsphoenix0724 @vanserrasswife @rowaelinsdaughter @redbleedingrose @acourtofwhatthefuck @clairebear08 @hieragalbatorixdottir @rromani-witch @vellichor01 @mischiefmanagers @i-am-a-lost-girl16 @icey--stars @alysena2 @loneliestluvr @meshellexplosionmurder @whatthefuckshappeningrn @thelov3lybookworm @eminvelaris @v3lv3tf0x

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mythicmanuscripts · 5 months ago

Note

OMG I saw ur aegon x vampire reader post and the note below it. I seriously need a vampire Aemond x reader!!!

Ps: UR WRITING IS SO GOATED I BINGED READ ALL OF THEM😭

Aw thank you anon!!! So the previous vampire!Aemond ask I answered was about how the relationship with Aemond started and I think I now want to spend some time on the actual relationship itself?

Anyway, enjoy my random babble about vampire!Aemond and let me know if you lads have thoughts! This will be the last vampire!aemond ask I answer without much info, if you want more of this then just be sure to put some more info then just “vampire!aemond”

Anyway once again, subby vampire!aemond below the cut! There’s no real coherence in this answer I’m just babbling about this so get ready for chaos

So as we’ve established, vampire!aemond won’t drink from any other once he’s fed off you. He will not touch another’s blood, he’d rather starve.

Also, I love the idea that this marriage wasn’t actually arranged? Or maybe you do have an arranged marriage but it’s with someone else at the red keep and not Aemond and well… those plans have to change real quick because once Aemond gets a taste of you he’ll burn down the whole fucking kingdom if anyone tried to get with you.

Anyway, I think what’s most interesting about this whole idea is that Aemond would seem to be the one in charge with how he behaves but then the moment you speak he’s practically curling up at your feet. He’s SO protective over you, but he’s protective in the same way dog would be? He’s always with you, always standing just a little behind you and keeping a close eye on whoever you’re talking to, he’ll attack if he thinks someone might hurt you, but at the same time he’s just so… obedient? You speak and suddenly he’s looking at you like you hung the moon and all its stars and waiting for bated breath for what you will say to him.

He’s well aware that he needs you far more than you need him, and no matter how many times you try to tell him that’s not true it doesn’t matter he won’t be convinced otherwise. He knows he will never be entitled to your body, and so he will cherish every second you do give him.

Needless to say, he treats you SO well. It’s not just about the blood either, he just gets along so well with you and he loves being around you and even if you said he could never feed from you again, he’ll starve without complaint and only ask that he be allowed to spend his last days with you.

So yeah it’s definitely not just that feeds off you, but I also think that because he feeds from you there are some things he does to try and look after you as best he can.

For starters, you will NEVER go hungry. I like the idea that vampires don’t eat normal food, but he still hires a servant whose sole just is to feed you. Aemond always enjoys you’re getting enough of everything you need like iron and calcium and that you have a balanced diet. But it’s more than just that, he also pays very close attention to the foods you like and the foods that you don’t so that he can relay it back to the servant.

He’s also pedantic about ensuring you eat enough and at regular intervals. It’s usually very rare for a vampire to only feed off of one person because one person losing a reasonable amount of blood regularly can cause fatigue and iron deficiencies and so much more.

He knows exactly how lucky he is to have found you and so he will not allow his feeding to cause any negative side effects for you. It’s not uncommon to be a big dinner or event of some kind and the servants serve you some foods high in iron and vitamin C that the other guests don’t. Of course you can also eat the normal food, but Aemond is very particular about ensuring there is always enough the beat possible food available for you to help with losing blood for him.

And lord help anyone who tries to mess with that, even if someone just asks to try something and you actually agree to it, he’ll still tell them off. Of course you don’t let him get away with this. You always turn to look at him and tell him to stop being so combative and to everyone’s shock he immediately nods and apologises because he hates seeing you unhappy with him.

I also think he gets VERY offended any time someone thinks he’s feeding form multiple people or offers to let him feed off them? Like I think maybe it would be quite common for neighbouring kingdoms to visit and bring their own people for blood supply and then as a sign of respect and trust, they’ll send one of their people to offer themselves to one of the vampires residing in the red keep.

More than once visitors have made the mistake of getting their people to offer a feed to Aemond. The first time they ask he just says no and ignored them. Then the second time he tells them to fuck off, and if they are come a third time then they’re getting kicked out.

It’s even worse if they try to make this offer when you’re there. You know Aemond will never do it and you don’t care how many people offer themselves to him, but Aemond sees them doing that as an insult to you? You’re sitting right there and they are to try to offer him another’s blood? Often you have to tell the poor human to scamper off before Aemond kills them.

And lastly, I wanna talk about Aemond after a feed? Well more specifically, Aemond after a bigger feed? He’ll drink from your neck for bigger feeds, and fuck once he’s had his full he’s almost blood drunk?

His head is all fuzzy and he’s so utterly satiated it’s like he can he can feel it in his bones. He’s so plaint then, will do whatever you say and often ends up more than a bit horny. You LOVE riding a blood drunk Aemond so much because he’s just completely blissed out the entire time, and when it’s finished he’ll just turn and hide in your arms, mumbling his thanks and promptly falling asleep.

#sub!aemond #vampire!aemond x reader #aemond targaryen smut #aemond targaryen x reader #aemond fanfiction #aemond x you #aemond fic #aemond smut #prince aemond #aemond one eye #aemond targaryen #hotd aemond #aemond x reader #house of the dragon #house of the dragon fanfiction #hotd #house of the dragon imagine

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