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#so yeah. i hc qyz and yy grew up under mq's purview
mccromy · 24 days
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Mu Qing is currently listening to a backlog of prayers one of his deputy officials tossed aside as unimportant, just in case Xie Lian prayed to him these past few centuries and he missed it. Until now, all of them are asinine, but he keeps going, though he's starting to zone out until he hears a child's voice:
"Xuan Zhen, Shixiong said I can ask you stuff. I want tea eggs for dinner."
Mu Qing blinks. It's not the first time a child asks him for something inane, but this prayer came from a very prestigious temple, only visited by serious cultivators, so it's odd. Perhaps the boy snook in, and it's unlikely he'll hear him again since it's likely he was caught after this.
Mu Qing keeps listening,
"Xuan Zhen, kill Jian Yu."
Ah.
So he wasn't caught.
"Xuan Zhen, where's Shixiong, he said he'd be back by now."
"Xuan Zhen, why is Jian Yu so ugly?"
Mu Qing is quickly losing his patience, how come nobody has caught the child yet?
Then he hears a young man's voice.
"O' General Xuan Zhen, the strongest of the Southern Generals, can you kill this brat? Can you make him explode? Who's ugly, huh? Please."
Then, the child's voice again
"Xuan Zhen, steal Jian Yu's teeth."
"O' General Xuan Zhen, the worthiest of the Southern Generals, this believer begs you to yeet this brat into a volcano, pretty please and thanks."
"Xuan Zhen why does Shixiong smell so good? Can you make us change rooms so I share with him."
"O' General Xuan Zhen, the wisest of the Southern Generals, that little shit took a piss on my shoes. Please, please can you make the bitch that birthed him come pick him up and take him AWAY. Thanks."
"Xuan Zhen, I want Shixiong to stop being angry at me for pissing on Jian Yu's shoes. Also, kill Jian Yu. Also, can you make it so Shixiong has more time to spar with me?"
"O' General Xuan Zhen, the ONLY God of the South as far as I'm concerned, you know? Fuck that other guy, what was his name? Dickneral? Haha. ANYWAYS. Can you just kill this kid? Kill him a little? Nobody has to know, please just make him LEAVE."
"Xuan Zhen, for my birthday I want a Shixiong Hug, and a nice belt that matches my Shixiong's. And That Shixiong keeps being angry forever at Jian Yu for burning my blankets! And that Jian Yu eats shit and dies."
Mu Qing is about to lose it. He cannot be wasting his time with this.
Then a new voice, another young man, prays calmly:
"General Xuan Zhen, this one apologizes my Shidis keep shouting their prayers out loud in your temples, I've taken care of it, please don't strike them dead. I'll light ten incense sticks in your honor, thank you."
Then, the prayers coming from that temple change to the usual stream of begging for protection and guidance cultivating.
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