#so this isnt every gay ever just a small sampling

[taejimin]

hi! so i’m kinda new and don’t follow many blogs besides yours bc it’s hard to find other lgbt ppl in this fandom i guess?? i haven’t found many other lgbts blogs, so if it’s not too much trouble could you rec me some lgbts blogs or at least any bts blogs run by lgbt ppl? btw your blog is my fave ❤️

yea sure! u could just check my following if u want i follow pretty much inclusively lgbt people cuz i like........cant handle. straights. but yeah here’s some in particular

@gaytae @lesbianblossomjimin @mangosuga @knjz @nevermindbyjin @gay-jk @hobixtape @ahjiminie @lesbiansana @lesbianbts @lesbianseokmin @lesbianwonwoo @jkslesbian @nonhetbts @yoonseok @taety @starprincejimin

[oceandiscourse]

my experience with ace tumblr

this is a very long story so im gonna put it under a readmore, its Worth The Read though

so, im 15 years old, and im a lesbian. when i was, like, 11, i didnt know that i was a lesbian, though, and thats where this story starts, because that’s the year that i made an account on tumblr dot com.

let me preface this by saying that i know that i shouldnt have been on tumblr at age 11 or 12, but im 99% sure everyone reading this will have had an account on some website when they were technically too young to. maybe it wasnt tumblr, maybe it was deviantart or something. idk. anyway, i had an account on tumblr.

also when i was 11 is around the time that i was first exposed to the lgbt community via various things. like, before that, i knew that people of the same gender could get married or whatever, but this was the first time that someone came into our class to talk about being lgbt, and some of my internet friends were gay, and stuff like that. this was the first time that i realized that lgbt people were real and that i could be lgbt. like, they were not some other, alienated group of people, they....totally existed.

fast forward to when i was 12. Here is a screenshot from my about page from that blog.

how did it get from that to this??? how did i go from being 11 years old and realizing that the lgbt community was something i could potentially be a part of to “i’m asexual and quoiromantic”? (also, please disregard the incorrect use of the word femme there, i was 12. trust me now i know its specifically for lesbians) long story short, i started getting involved in ace tumblr and their overcomplicated labels.

i was on a part of tumblr that always talked about “the allosexuals” and how they only ever thought about sex and that if you dont want to fuck every single person you meet You Are Somewhere On The Asexual Spectrum. basically, my 12-year-old self unknowingly used this as a way to avoid acknowledging that i was a girl who liked girls. i thought, “oh, orientation can describe not just who you like, but how you like them. this makes things a whole lot more easy!”

no. it cant. thats not how orientations work.

lets break down the terminology i used.

asexual means not experiencing sexual attraction, obviously. i dont think i should need to explain this, but 12 year olds are not really supposed to look at people and think “i want to fuck that person”. that like. doesnt happen. almost ever. like, some people in my class were getting into watching porn or whatever around that point, but nobody was like.... deciding they wanted to have sex with people at age 12. at least, not in the sample size of my small grade 7 class.

iirc, quoiromantic means that you cant distinguish between romantic and platonic feelings. doesnt that......doesnt that also just describe typical 12-year-old behaviour? especially from a 12-year-old who’s a lesbian and struggling with compulsory heterosexuality? like.... hmmm.

also as i side note i love “i like femme-presenting people” like. sweetie. honey. you like girls. youre a lesbian. h oney. you dont even have a preference for where someone is on the futch scale you just like girls. Bapy. i was such a fool.

ANYWAY, “asexual quoiromantic” basically describes.... what things are supposed to be like for a 12 year old. thats just . like. natural. feelings are complicated at that age, once again, especially when youre a lesbian but dont realize it yet.

because of how much the ace tumblr mindset stuck with me, i didnt acknowledge that i was A Lesbian who Only Liked Girls until around the middle of grade 8. it was a lot of other things besides ace tumblr that contributed to this, and i would argue that it was probably mostly the fact that i was just raised in a society that basically says the destiny of every girl is to one day fall in love with a guy and get married and stuff.

but what ace tumblr did contribute to is the fact that i’m pretty much just now realizing, years later, that i’m allowed to be interested in sex. sex isnt inherently gross. sex isnt dirty. if you want to have sex, thats ok. being on ace tumblr was terrible for me because there was a lot of stuff shaming people who are interested in sex, or acting like they’re weird or it’s the only thing they think about. because like....thats not how it works. thats not how sexual attraction works. it doesnt consume your life, its just another part of it. and i am finally, just now, realizing that that’s okay and not inherently gross!!! finally!!!!! getting involved in ace tumblr stunted that part of my development really badly.

people need to realize that ace tumblr stuff reaches young kids who are trying to figure out their identity, and if those kids are sga it can really really hurt them. people need to think about that. i’m not trying to attack someone, but a lot of the messages that ace tumblr spreads about what being “allosexual” is are really harmful and shitty.