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altraviolet · 2 years

Text

recipes, Fandom Wank, racism?

So at some point in 2007/2008, I found a thread of like... idk what was going on exactly. I think someone was talking about racism in the context of Fandom Wank, and then other people started butting in posting recipes. I saved the recipes, then at some point got annoyed by all the garbage in between them and copy pasted the whole damn thing, figuring I'd go back later and cut out the irrelevant posts and organize the recipes.

15 years later this lil old RTF has what I assume someone will call a goldmine look into the past.

So here it is. The entire thing. You'll see that at the beginning I separated out the recipes and then stopped bothering. I very honestly didn't look at all the comments so WARNING you might see shit you didn't want to see. But yeah. Also screen reader friends you probably want to skip this cuz there’s a ton of just like, written out html stuff. Okay here you go:

From F_W 1/1/07 http://www.journalfen.net/community/fandom_wank/1041982.html?thread=141665342#t141665342

No Frost Chocolate Chip Cake 1 Pk. sour cream chocolate cake 1 1/2 cups chocolate chips 1/2 cup oil 4 eggs 1 cup sour cream 1 3oz instant chocolate pudding 1/2 cup warm water

Stir cake mix, pudding mix, eggs, and sour cream together. Add oil, chocolate chips, and warm water. Mix well. Bake 45-55 minutes at 350 degrees. Sprinkle with powder sugar. It's delicious!

http://www.journalfen.net/community/fandom_wank/1041982.html?thread=141733950#t141733950 Singe's Peach Cobbler

1 cup self-rising flour 1 stick butter or margarine 1 cup sugar 1 cup milk 1 15oz can of yellow cling peaches in syrup

Melt butter in deep-dish skillet or casserole dish. Mix together milk, sugar and flour and pour over the butter. (Do not mix in!) Pour can of peaches, syrup and all, over the batter. (Do not mix in!) Place in oven at 350 degrees and bake until it's bubbly brown. Serve hot with vanilla ice cream.

~~~~

"Why the hell is my paycheck two days late?!" soup (digigirl132)

~1 pound of some sort of cut up/ground up meat (hamburger works best, but feel free to use whatever you have on hand) ~1 pound or 1 1/2 pounds veggies of your choice (if you like broth, go with the first. if you like stuff, go with the second) ~1 can diced tomatoes (optional) ~6-9 cups water (depending on how much broth you like) ~1 bayleaf ~2 bullion cubes for every 3 cups of water (you beef for cow meats, and chicken for any other kinds of meats.) ~a dash of garlic ~a dash of salt ~a dash of pepper ~a dash of whatever other seasonings you like

STEP ONE: Fully cook meat in a frying pan. STEP TWO: Add water, veggies, tomatoes, bullion cubes, and bayleaf to either a crockpot on high or a "noodle pot" on 6. (I forget what they're really called, but they're the really big pots that are freaking impossible to lift if they are full of water) STEP THREE: once the water is bubbling a little (but not full out boiling), turn the heat down to low on the crockpot or 1 on the "noodle pot" and add the cooked meat. Add seasonings. STEP FOUR: Let cook for an hour and a half, stirring every ten minutes. STEP FIVE: Eat soup.

This recipie serves 6-8 people. The name tells you how my family discovered this recipie. ^_^

From http://www.journalfen.net/community/fandom_wank/1164745.html?thread=181818057#t181818057 2 boneless chicken breat halves 1 large onion, sliced 3 tablespoons veg. oil 1 can sliced tomatoes 1 teaspoon grated ginger (or 1/2 teaspoon powdered) 1 1/2 teaspoons salt (or to taste) 3 tablespoons curry powder 1 tablespoon chili powder 1/2 cup yogurt (plain) Cut chicken into small cubes. Heat oil in large skillet and sautÈ onions (long slow cooking at this stage is the secret to a good curry! :) ). Don't brown - just cook for about 10 minutes until nice and soft. Add garlic (1 teaspoon) and ginger and continue cooking for about 2 minutes. Add chili powder and curry power and stir and cook about 1 minute. Add tomatoes (with juice!) and mix well. Add salt. Stir in chicken and cover. Cook over low heat about 30 minutes until chicken is done. Stir in yogurt until smooth. Serve with rice and naan and death pickles! Love, Sera's mom

from same F_W as above:fern_on_fen ([info]fern_on_fen) wrote in [info]fandom_wank,

@ 2008-07-03 15:24:00

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Entry tags: anonymeme, dramatic reading, fandom: doctor who, ianto is crying, lurk moar, oh christ here we go again, omg mock people mock, oppression, outraged mice, please delete me, please mommy make it stop, race wank, racism, raised by hyenas, serious business, someone is wrong on the internet!, still not funny, stop sharing your thoughts, think of the children, this is not funny, this is the wank that never ends, too many fucking tags, unfunny business, wankers who will not shut up, wanking inside the house, what is wrong with you people?, what the shit is this?, whut, writers are often pompous douches, you are not funny, your kink is not okay

Race Wank? In Who Fandom? It's just as likely as you'd think… As Whomageddon rolls on, [info]doctorwho brings us another sterling gem. Or rather, two bright turds of wank, coupled together to form a synergistic pile of perfection.

First, [info]cringer1982 shares that he's written a very pointed letter to the BBC about how they have portrayed Asians in their recent episode Turn Left. He neglects to mention that he's white as the fresh driven snow. Irish, in fact.

BBC officials respond with a letter that has nothing to do with anything.

Some people don't see his point.

[info]myfavouriteplum is just as mad at Turn Left, but being Chinese, with an appropriately Chinese icon, people seem to be taking her protests a little more seriously.

Hilariously, seriously in fact.

It was a bit like if they had "Planet of the Africans" and had people dancing around with spears and singing "Mammy". Do. Not. Want.

Also, the anon meme continues to be offended by everything.

Who wank, I just don't know how to quit you.

(Post a new comment)

[info]tarash 2008-07-03 08:46 pm UTC (link) Good thing: The guy sends a letter/e-mail of complaint to the people responsible for Doctor Who. While I'm sure the racism debate on LJ and other fannish circles does a lot of good in that it makes people think about character portrayal and all that, those essays and discussions aren't going to change the show. So, good on the guy to complain to the actual people responsible for the things he found offensive.

Bad thing: Well, like the anon meme said "LET'S PLAY FUNNY/NOT FUNNY

FUNNY: FANDOM_WANK NOT FUNNY: RACISM

SEE THE DIFFERENCE?"

(Reply to this)(Thread)

[info]goblin 2008-07-03 08:58 pm UTC (link) I LAUGHED AT THE TAGS. I LAUGHED IN ANTICIPATION OF A TSUNAMI OF "LURK MOAR". THERE IS HUMOUR TO BE HAD, MY FRIEND, JUST NOT WHERE THE OP EXPECTED IT.

AND WHAT'S SO SCANDALOUSLY WANKY ABOUT A WHITE GUY DISAPPROVING OF RACISM, ANYWAY? OOPS, I SHOULD HAVE TOSSED A TOWEL ON THE FLOOR BEFORE I SAID THAT. HOLD ON; I KNOW WHERE THE MOP IS.

(Reply to this)(Parent)(Thread) (no subject) - [info]tarash, 2008-07-03 09:01 pm UTC (no subject) - [info]goblin, 2008-07-03 09:05 pm UTC (no subject) - [info]tsubaki, 2008-07-03 10:22 pm UTC (no subject) - [info]goblin, 2008-07-03 10:26 pm UTC

[info]lab 2008-07-03 08:49 pm UTC (link) The next time you think about posting this here - turn right.

(Reply to this)(Thread)

[info]puipui 2008-07-03 09:16 pm UTC (link) Don't mind me, I'm just here to post with the matching icon. YET AGAIN. >:(

(Reply to this)(Parent)(Thread) (no subject) - [info]ari_o, 2008-07-03 09:25 pm UTC (no subject) - [info]lab, 2008-07-03 09:40 pm UTC (no subject) - [info]puipui, 2008-07-03 09:46 pm UTC Ok, the chor - [info]lab, 2008-07-03 09:53 pm UTC

[info]sevendeadlyfun 2008-07-03 08:53 pm UTC (link) Wow. Even I know race wank isn't funny. Next time, bring Twilight wank instead. That's a guaranteed funny.

(Reply to this)(Thread) (no subject) - [info]disdainful_soul, 2008-07-03 09:08 pm UTC (no subject) - [info]sevendeadlyfun, 2008-07-03 09:11 pm UTC (no subject) - [info]disdainful_soul, 2008-07-03 09:15 pm UTC (no subject) - [info]tarash, 2008-07-03 09:20 pm UTC (no subject) - [info]sevendeadlyfun, 2008-07-03 09:25 pm UTC (no subject) - [info]tarash, 2008-07-03 09:31 pm UTC (no subject) - [info]cmdr_zoom, 2008-07-03 09:38 pm UTC (no subject) - [info]sevendeadlyfun, 2008-07-03 09:41 pm UTC (no subject) - [info]eleutheria, 2008-07-03 10:54 pm UTC (no subject) - [info]ultimi_scopuli, 2008-07-03 10:25 pm UTC (no subject) - [info]missm, 2008-07-03 10:04 pm UTC (no subject) - [info]sevendeadlyfun, 2008-07-03 11:11 pm UTC (no subject) - [info]rennyn_alerothi, 2008-07-03 09:22 pm UTC (no subject) - [info]tsubaki, 2008-07-03 10:23 pm UTC (no subject) - [info]dragonfangirl, 2008-07-03 10:40 pm UTC (no subject) - [info]sevendeadlyfun, 2008-07-03 10:41 pm UTC (no subject) - [info]bukowski, 2008-07-03 10:52 pm UTC (no subject) - [info]iwanttobeasleep, 2008-07-03 11:04 pm UTC (no subject) - [info]sevendeadlyfun, 2008-07-03 11:10 pm UTC

[info]aslantabook 2008-07-03 08:53 pm UTC (link) I hear "Who Wank" sung as an existential version of "She Bang".

And every time Roberta signs her posts, I read it as a random interjection of her name.

Matt Daaaaamonnn…

(Reply to this)

[info]llama_treats 2008-07-03 09:06 pm UTC (link) I loved Turn Left.

So there.

P.S. I'm white as the fresh driven snow. Well, with a slight tan.

(Reply to this)

[info]freewheel 2008-07-03 09:07 pm UTC (link) I don't know about him, but I eat potatoes, drink Guinness and guard my pot of gold all the time. Sounds like a good Friday night to me.

(Reply to this)(Thread) (no subject) - [info]judyhazeleyes, 2008-07-03 09:30 pm UTC (no subject) - [info]goblin, 2008-07-03 10:40 pm UTC

[info]puipui 2008-07-03 09:15 pm UTC (link) Who wank, I just don't know how to quit you.

But, oh, how we wish you did.

(Reply to this)

[info]eldritch 2008-07-03 09:16 pm UTC (link) I'm just ASTOUNDED at how people STILL haven't learned that F_W and racism don't mix.

Do we need helpful diagrams? I think we might.

(Reply to this)(Thread) (no subject) - [info]ari_o, 2008-07-03 09:20 pm UTC (no subject) - [info]goblin, 2008-07-03 10:17 pm UTC

[info]ari_o 2008-07-03 09:18 pm UTC (link) There is a time and place. This is neither.

(Reply to this) My mom's chicken curry! [info]seraphtrevs 2008-07-03 09:20 pm UTC (link) 2 boneless chicken breat halves 1 large onion, sliced 3 tablespoons veg. oil 1 can sliced tomatoes 1 teaspoon grated ginger (or 1/2 teaspoon powdered) 1 1/2 teaspoons salt (or to taste) 3 tablespoons curry powder 1 tablespoon chili powder 1/2 cup yogurt (plain)

Cut chicken into small cubes. Heat oil in large skillet and sautÈ onions (long slow cooking at this stage is the secret to a good curry! :) ). Don't brown - just cook for about 10 minutes until nice and soft. Add garlic and ginger and continue cooking for about 2 minutes. Add chili powder and curry power and stir and cook about 1 minute. Add tomatoes (with juice!) and mix well. Add salt.

Stir in chicken and cover. Cook over low heat about 30 minutes until chicken is done. Stir in yogurt until smooth.

Serve with rice and naan and death pickles!

Love, Sera's mom

(Reply to this)(Thread) Re: My mom's chicken curry! - [info]ari_o, 2008-07-03 09:21 pm UTC Re: My mom's chicken curry! - [info]seraphtrevs, 2008-07-03 09:25 pm UTC (no subject) - [info]ari_o, 2008-07-03 09:27 pm UTC (no subject) - [info]seraphtrevs, 2008-07-03 09:31 pm UTC hahaha good times! - [info]rennyn_alerothi, 2008-07-03 09:26 pm UTC Re: hahaha good times! - [info]ari_o, 2008-07-03 09:28 pm UTC Re: hahaha good times! - [info]witty, 2008-07-03 09:52 pm UTC Re: hahaha good times! - [info]sadako, 2008-07-03 09:45 pm UTC Re: hahaha good times! - [info]rennyn_alerothi, 2008-07-03 09:57 pm UTC Re: My mom's chicken curry! - [info]rennyn_alerothi, 2008-07-03 09:24 pm UTC Re: My mom's chicken curry! - [info]seraphtrevs, 2008-07-03 09:26 pm UTC Re: My mom's chicken curry! - [info]cjk, 2008-07-03 09:38 pm UTC Re: My mom's chicken curry! - [info]seraphtrevs, 2008-07-03 09:43 pm UTC Re: My mom's chicken curry! - [info]rushikayu13, 2008-07-03 10:00 pm UTC Re: My mom's chicken curry! - [info]seraphtrevs, 2008-07-03 10:02 pm UTC Re: My mom's chicken curry! - [info]rushikayu13, 2008-07-03 10:06 pm UTC Re: My mom's chicken curry! - [info]seldomnaughty, 2008-07-03 10:07 pm UTC Re: My mom's chicken curry! - [info]miss_padfoot, 2008-07-03 11:05 pm UTC Re: My mom's chicken curry! - [info]seraphtrevs, 2008-07-03 11:09 pm UTC Re: My mom's chicken curry! - [info]finchbird, 2008-07-03 11:31 pm UTC Plan B: Post pictures of hot people [info]alya1989262 2008-07-03 09:30 pm UTC (link) I'll start.

(Reply to this)(Thread) Re: Plan B: Post pictures of hot people - [info]wieimmer, 2008-07-03 09:41 pm UTC Re: Plan B: Post pictures of hot people - [info]sadako, 2008-07-03 09:42 pm UTC Re: Plan B: Post pictures of hot people - [info]kattahj, 2008-07-03 09:50 pm UTC Re: Plan B: Post pictures of hot people - [info]mrs260, 2008-07-03 09:50 pm UTC Re: Plan B: Post pictures of hot people - [info]seraphtrevs, 2008-07-03 10:01 pm UTC Re: Plan B: Post pictures of hot people - [info]rennyn_alerothi, 2008-07-03 10:11 pm UTC Re: Plan B: Post pictures of hot people - [info]seraphtrevs, 2008-07-03 10:23 pm UTC Re: Plan B: Post pictures of hot people - [info]rennyn_alerothi, 2008-07-03 10:30 pm UTC Re: Plan B: Post pictures of hot people - [info]seraphtrevs, 2008-07-03 10:35 pm UTC Re: Plan B: Post pictures of hot people - [info]rennyn_alerothi, 2008-07-03 10:38 pm UTC Re: Plan B: Post pictures of hot people - [info]judyhazeleyes, 2008-07-03 10:38 pm UTC Re: Plan B: Post pictures of hot people - [info]tarash, 2008-07-03 09:47 pm UTC Re: Plan B: Post pictures of hot people - [info]rennyn_alerothi, 2008-07-03 10:09 pm UTC Re: Plan B: Post pictures of hot people - [info]alya1989262, 2008-07-03 10:10 pm UTC Re: Plan B: Post pictures of hot people - [info]rennyn_alerothi, 2008-07-03 10:19 pm UTC Re: Plan B: Post pictures of hot people - [info]rennyn_alerothi, 2008-07-03 10:17 pm UTC Re: Plan B: Post pictures of hot people - [info]alya1989262, 2008-07-03 10:23 pm UTC Re: Plan B: Post pictures of hot people - [info]rennyn_alerothi, 2008-07-03 10:27 pm UTC Re: Plan B: Post pictures of hot people - [info]alya1989262, 2008-07-03 10:30 pm UTC Re: Plan B: Post pictures of hot people - [info]rennyn_alerothi, 2008-07-03 10:32 pm UTC Re: Plan B: Post pictures of hot people - [info]alya1989262, 2008-07-03 10:40 pm UTC Re: Plan B: Post pictures of hot people - [info]rennyn_alerothi, 2008-07-03 10:44 pm UTC Re: Plan B: Post pictures of hot people - [info]alya1989262, 2008-07-03 10:45 pm UTC Re: Plan B: Post pictures of hot people - [info]wieimmer, 2008-07-03 10:54 pm UTC Re: Plan B: Post pictures of hot people - [info]rennyn_alerothi, 2008-07-03 10:56 pm UTC Re: Plan B: Post pictures of hot people - [info]alya1989262, 2008-07-03 11:03 pm UTC Re: Plan B: Post pictures of hot people - [info]rennyn_alerothi, 2008-07-03 11:04 pm UTC Re: Plan B: Post pictures of hot people - [info]rennyn_alerothi, 2008-07-03 11:15 pm UTC Re: Plan B: Post pictures of hot people - [info]alya1989262, 2008-07-03 11:20 pm UTC Re: Plan B: Post pictures of hot people - [info]tehrin, 2008-07-03 11:22 pm UTC Re: Plan B: Post pictures of hot people - [info]alya1989262, 2008-07-03 11:32 pm UTC Re: Plan B: Post pictures of hot people - [info]puipui, 2008-07-03 10:47 pm UTC Re: Plan B: Post pictures of hot people - [info]alya1989262, 2008-07-03 10:53 pm UTC Re: Plan B: Post pictures of hot people - [info]puipui, 2008-07-03 11:10 pm UTC Re: Plan B: Post pictures of hot people - [info]alya1989262, 2008-07-03 11:17 pm UTC Re: Plan B: Post pictures of hot people - [info]puipui, 2008-07-03 11:20 pm UTC Re: Plan B: Post pictures of hot people - [info]puipui, 2008-07-03 11:33 pm UTC Re: Plan B: Post pictures of hot people - [info]puipui, 2008-07-03 11:18 pm UTC Re: Plan B: Post pictures of hot people - [info]eleutheria, 2008-07-03 10:59 pm UTC Re: Plan B: Post pictures of hot people - [info]rennyn_alerothi, 2008-07-03 11:03 pm UTC Re: Plan B: Post pictures of hot people - [info]eleutheria, 2008-07-03 11:07 pm UTC Re: Plan B: Post pictures of hot people - [info]rennyn_alerothi, 2008-07-03 11:09 pm UTC Re: Plan B: Post pictures of hot people - [info]kosaginolegion, 2008-07-03 11:21 pm UTC Re: Plan B: Post pictures of hot people - [info]kosaginolegion, 2008-07-03 11:19 pm UTC Re: Plan B: Post pictures of hot people - [info]goblin, 2008-07-03 10:37 pm UTC Re: Plan B: Post pictures of hot people - [info]rennyn_alerothi, 2008-07-03 10:41 pm UTC Re: Plan B: Post pictures of hot people - [info]rennyn_alerothi, 2008-07-03 10:54 pm UTC Re: Plan B: Post pictures of hot people - [info]goblin, 2008-07-03 11:01 pm UTC Re: Plan B: Post pictures of hot people - [info]rennyn_alerothi, 2008-07-03 11:05 pm UTC Re: Plan B: Post pictures of hot people - [info]judyhazeleyes, 2008-07-03 10:39 pm UTC Re: Plan B: Post pictures of hot people - [info]bigbigtruck, 2008-07-03 10:33 pm UTC Re: Plan B: Post pictures of hot people - [info]misswindy, 2008-07-03 10:52 pm UTC

[info]sneer 2008-07-03 09:42 pm UTC (link) Kidnapper's Casserole

2 teaspoons oil 1/2 cup sliced onion 2 to 2 1/2 cups cooked flat noodles 1 cup sliced mushrooms 1/2 shredded cooked ham or ham-in-a-can 2/3 cup cubed cheese (any kind) 1/2 teaspoon each salt, marjoram, and thyme 1/4 teaspoon pepper 2 tablespoons cracker crumbs 1 egg, beaten with 2 tablespoons milk 2 to 3 tablespoons grated cheese

Saute onion in oil 3 to 5 minutes. Combine in bowl with noodles, mushrooms, ham, cheese, and seasonings. Sprinkle buttered casserole dish with crumbs; spoon noodle mixture in. Top with egg mixture. Bake in 400 degree oven 20 minutes, sprinkle with grated cheese, bake 10 more minutes.

(Reply to this)(Thread) (no subject) - [info]phosfate, 2008-07-03 09:59 pm UTC (no subject) - [info]sneer, 2008-07-03 10:08 pm UTC (no subject) - [info]phosfate, 2008-07-03 10:13 pm UTC (no subject) - [info]missdaisy, 2008-07-03 10:20 pm UTC (no subject) - [info]knightrider, 2008-07-03 10:57 pm UTC (no subject) - [info]sneer, 2008-07-03 11:04 pm UTC (no subject) - [info]miss_padfoot, 2008-07-03 11:00 pm UTC (no subject) - [info]sneer, 2008-07-03 11:05 pm UTC

[info]seca 2008-07-03 10:05 pm UTC (link) I have nothing to add but boobies.

(Reply to this)(Thread) (no subject) - [info]insanitys_place, 2008-07-03 11:05 pm UTC (no subject) - [info]darkling, 2008-07-03 11:19 pm UTC (no subject) - [info]airborne_rodent, 2008-07-03 11:22 pm UTC

[info]panthea 2008-07-03 10:10 pm UTC (link) OH FOR THE LOVE OF CHRIST.

Does nobody learn things anymore?

(Reply to this)

[info]mad_teacup 2008-07-03 10:23 pm UTC (link) Lolz.

(Reply to this)

[info]missdaisy 2008-07-03 10:23 pm UTC (link) It's a competition, right? You're all trying to find The One Funny Race Wank, aren't you? What's the prize? I'll pay you double to cut it the fuck out.

(Reply to this)

[info]deliciouschaos 2008-07-03 10:35 pm UTC (link) No.

(Reply to this)

[info]deludedvision 2008-07-03 10:41 pm UTC (link) I love that this Saturday Who fandom might succeed where Potter fandom failed: massive breaking of the internet.

It's going to be fun.

(Reply to this) Fried Rice and Peanut Grilled Chicken [info]tehrin 2008-07-03 10:48 pm UTC (link) Fried Rice

4 cups cooled, cooked rice 4 tbsp olive oil 2 large eggs 1 tsp salt pepper 2 tbsp soy sauce 2 chopped green onions

Heat 2 tbsp olive oil in wok or large skillet. Combine eggs, pepper, and salt in a bowl and wisk lightly, then scramble in wok. Put eggs aside in a bowl and clean out wok.

Heat 2 tbsp of olive oil in wok and add rice. Heat and stir rice for a few minutes, then add soy sauce and eggs and stir. Add green onions then remove from eat.

Peanut Grilled Chicken

2 tbsp peanut butter 1 tbsp lime juice 2 tsp soy sauce 1 clove chopped garlic 1/2 to 3/4 curry powder dash of red pepper 4 boneless, skinless chicken breasts

Preheat grill to medium. Combine ingredients (except chicken) in a small bowl. 2.Place chicken on grill and brush half of the mixture on chicken. Cook for 6 minutes, then flip and brush with remaining sauce. Grill for 6 or 7 minutes or until chicken is no longer pink (170 degrees F).

#having difficulty getting this to post #long post #there we go ok #I wonder if tumblr #still does the #5 tag thing #where anything after #5 tags doesn't #show up in search #which is what i want #so i can tag this:#recipes #Fandom Wank #fandom history #I didn't know 'fannish' was used back then

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castletown-cafe · 3 years

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Castletown Café Episode 5: Java Cookies

This week on Castletown Cafe, we’re making something that was cut from the game: Java Cookies. I’m sure many of you in the fandom might be excited to see me include cut content, and we have all the dataminers out there to thank for their hard work at uncovering early concepts and all kinds of items and ideas that never made it in to the final game.

I love the concept of the Java Cookies. Not only are they a reference to JavaScript, they’re also described to be a delicious coffee and chocolate cookie, and words come out as you eat them. According to the game’s files, these wordy cookies would have healed Kris more than any other party member, due to their love of chocolate, which I can’t blame. Although, since they’re similar to CD Bagels, which play music when you feed them to your party members, I wonder if these Java Cookies were an early version of those. And given that these would have healed Kris more than anyone else, and adding the context of a certain…..alternate route….hm…..I wonder indeed.

But, never mind all that! If you ask me, a real-life Java Cookie sounds like your basic chocolate chip cookie with the addition of coffee flavor via instant espresso powder. Which sounds to me like a match made in [[HEAVEN, ARE YOU WATCHING?]]!

…..wait, what was that?

Anyways, it’s a shame these cookies never saw the light of day. But I can imagine these being served at the Color Café! I’m sure they’d go nicely with a cup of that Personalized Tea that the Addisons sell. At least we’ve got them available in our Castletown Café - complete with recipe.

It’s super simple: just your basic chocolate chip cookie recipe with the addition of espresso powder! Mine’s a small-batch recipe, but it still yields about two dozen cookies. Need more for a party? This recipe is easy to double!

JAVA COOKIES

Ingredients:

1 & 1/4 cup all-purpose flour

1/2 tsp salt

1/2 tsp baking soda

2 tsp instant espresso powder (if you want it stronger, add a third teaspoon)

1 stick (aka 1/2 cup) butter, softened

1/2 cup light brown sugar, firmly packed

1/4 cup granulated white sugar

1 egg

1/2 tsp vanilla extract

1 cup semi-sweet chocolate chips (or milk chocolate if you’d prefer sweeter)

Preheat your oven to 350 degrees F (180 degrees C) and gather and measure your ingredients. In a bowl, combine your flour, baking soda, salt, and espresso powder. Set aside.

Cream together your softened butter with the sugars. Once fully incorporated, add your egg and vanilla extract. Mix it together, and then…

Gradually combine your flour mixture in with your wet ingredients. Once your wet and dry ingredients are fully mixed together to form your cookie dough, add in your chocolate chips and fold them in until fully incorporated, so that every bite of those cookies have chocolatey goodness when baked.

Spoon drops of your cookie dough onto a cookie sheet, leaving enough space for your cookies to spread as they bake. Bake for 10 minutes or until golden brown. Have them cool on the cookie sheet for a few minutes before transferring them to a wire rack for them to finish cooking - but absolutely enjoy one (or two) while they’re fresh! They’re best that way!

Store these cookies in an airtight container for a few days. They have a short shelf life, so eat ‘em quick! And with how good these are, they’re sure to disappear fast. In fact, I think Kris just polished off the last of them. I just hope they shared with their friends.

Wait….is it getting cold in here, or is it just me?

……

Uh-oh.

#castletown cafe #deltarune #deltarune chaper 2 #deltarune inspired recipe #deltarune food #kris dreemurr #noelle holiday #java cookies #my art #snowgrave #cut content #cooking #recipe #cw food #food tw #cookies

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courage-a-word-of-justice · 5 years

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Iruma-kun 8 - 9 | BnHA 68 - 71 | NGL 8 - 9 | ID: Invaded Sneak Preview (i.e. eps 1 - 2)

Tw: suicide for ID: Invaded, by the way (it’s only briefly in the commentary, but it’s in ep 2). Plus, ID: Invaded gets its hashtag well before its debut.

Iruma-kun 8

“Lady Redhair”? I think Amelie’s hair is orange, but you do you, Clara.

I paused at the wrong time and saw Asmodeus had bug eyes behind his glasses.

Is that the vending machine Clara attacked her bullies with…?

I wonder what rank Amelie is…

Diabolical + botany = diabotany.

Come to think of it, the Azz-Azz/Iruma relationship is similar to the Gokudera/Tsuna relationship…

So as it turns out, Clara gets her juvenile tendencies from taking care of her younger siblings. Hmm…

Aw, it’s kinda disheartening to see Clara so down. It looks a lot like Zenitsu when he doesn’t see his own abilities, or something of the sort (which I always fall hook, lin and sinker for).

I wonder what Amelie’s seduction percentage is…?

Oh, you can see Succubus-sensei in the ED…hmm.

Update: where is Clara’s dad…? *gulps if he’s passed away*

Iruma-kun 9

Azz-kun is such a proud parent…even though he’s the same age as Iruma, LOL.

Lack of ambition? Clara just proved this wrong last episode and Sabro has his own ambitions…but then again, Azz-kun wasn’t privy to such knowledge.

“Fear 1” is a pun on ikkai (first floor). (At least, that’s what I can assume from context.)

There doesn’t actually seem to be a pun when Azz mentions Execution Cannonball (shokei gyokuhou)…which, I think, is weirder than having a pun in the first place. (The later joke is that Clara says gyouki instead of gyokuhou, which is pretty far off for part of it but completely spot on for the other , so the subbers put in a phrase that matched that kind of pattern in the English as well.)

Rumour has it there’s going to be an Iruma-kun dub. I wonder how they’ll make all the puns work…?

It’s-wahahaha! It’s just dodgeball!

Huh? A high-ranking demon? Sullivan? Opera?????

LOL, you can still see the tree sprouting from one of the rooms.

The Demonitor is handing Opera the dodgeballs, LOL!

I like Opera’s nails…they’re a nice shade of purple…

Ponytail Iruma…looks a bit strange, but I’ll get used to it. I like ponytails, y’know.

Even Azz-kun’s hands are big in comparison to Iruma…

That preview was far too abrupt!

BnHA 68

The giant moving crab is actually a thing. I went and saw it one time in Ginza and again on Dotonbori, Osaka. The crab is associated with Kani Doraku, a crab restaurant.

“Amajiki” literally means something like “eats the sky”. A good name for my good boi.

The subbers didn’t even finish the word “defence”! Eesh!

Amajiki likes butterflies…? I wonder, if he ate butter, could he be a butterfly too…?

Running All Might, I see…(it’s a parody of the Glico Running Man in Osaka.)

Basically, this is what Vigilantes was for! Woot!

I love how Kaminari charges people’s phones. That’s the sort of dumb thing heroes do with their powers, since you gotta remember they’re just young dumb boys at heart as well.

The problem with a hardening power is that it sounds lewd out of context…

I wonder what Fat Gum’s first job was…?

There’s a post-credits segment…keep watching.

BnHA 69

Centipeder has such a cute voice, albeit a distorted one.

Kirishima is voiced by Masuda, so it’s fun to hear him get such a prominent role again (after Charanko in OPM s2, Touken Ranbu and Boueibu, among other roles).

“Likes: All Might” – LOL, we knew that already though.

Nighteye is Seiya Ryuuguuin: Hero Version.

There’s a post-credits segment. Keep watching.

The manga calls the magical girl series “Preyure”, so it’s weird to suddenly have the dub refer to its dub name, “Glitter Force”.

BnHA 70

Midoriya doesn’t have any bedhead…because his hair’s already messy! LOL.

“…what’s important is what you do afterwards.”

“Maybe we can catch the League…and the Hassaikai all at once!” – Yeah…that’s not going to happen Kirishima, considering the series is still going.

Come to think of it, Eraser’s goggles are the only part of his outfit that don’t really match…no wonder the idea comes from somone else (maybe saying that is a spoiler for those only following the main series and not Vigilantes, though…?).

Swordfish will become important later on…you know Tamaki’s Quirk, so you’ll see when it’s important soon.

Another post-credits segment…keep watching.

BnHA 71

One of the reasons I like Amajiki is because of his intro. Now you can see why!

Hassaikai = Hassai Group, so calling the opponents the “Shie Hassaikai” and “Hassai Group” in the same translaton is inconsistent.

“…playing into their hands.” – You can’t say that when you don’t have hands, Tamaki…

No Guns Life 8

Well, there ain’t no metaphor like the blatant one – man is the deadliest weapon to himself…or something of the sort.

Geesh! I wanna dub for this!

Well…couldn’t Olivier light the cig and stick it in Juzo’s mouth…? Or is that not “sexy enough” for the target audience?

No Guns Life 9

I’ve noticed only the women have lip flaps now…LOL. (But maybe I’m stating the obvious because my head’s a bit fuzzy from lack of sleep…)

“Medico” appears to be the Spanish word for “doctor” (as you might be able to guess). Then again, what Spanish colonies are there in the world…? Spain, sure, and South America…*googles* Basically all of South America, dangit.

Context says “madre” = mother.

Context also says “mentira” = lie, or “you’re lying!”.

Geesh, that cup size joke was such a non-sequitur that I didn’t even find it funny…

Geesh! This Colt dude is basically Sabro (from Iruma-kun)! Update: He also looks like he came straight outta JJBA.

ID: Invaded 1 – 2 (SNEAK PREVIEW!)

I thought I wouldn’t be able to access the preview, but by accessing Funimation’s videos…I can watch it!

Ohmygloooooooob, this “I’m in pieces, but I’m connected” concept is so cool! (But also hella freaky, which is exactly my style!...You do know that I’m a bit of a freak for body horror, right?)

You…probably shouldn’t be yelling at the person if they appear to be dead(!)

This would make an awesome escape game, no…?

I never knew the future looked so similar to the present.

Ooh, this gets more and more interesting! There are people watching this murder mystery.

Whose ID Well is this…? If it’s Sakaido’s, then maybe he can find out more about himself through the celebs.

The code appears to be from the Windows operting system, since C: is the default hard drive. So I’d say it might be Windows Visual Basic, actually, or C (the programming language).

Hmm…maybe that’s when the episode ws being produced.

Okay, so how I’m understanding this is that Sakaido is in the world of the murderer (of Kaeru’s) mind and he has to find her murderer to get out.

Ooh, so Sakaido is also a murderer…and as it turns out, Sakaido’s perp drills holes in the heads of their victims…scary. What I was really here to say was that this reminds me of a movie called Minority Report.

I think one of the victims had part of his head missing in the ID Well, so maybe Sakaido’s missing an elbow in real life…?

The joke is that the word for “well” in Japanese is i (井) or ido (井戸) and then ID, of course, is ID and likewise id is id (but it’s ido in Japanese). Googling ID: Invaded reveals Sakaido is written with this same kanji, plus two others (酒井戸), meaning his name is part of the wordplay too.

It’s like Minecraft, except you make the world with your entire body…LOL.

Maybe that’s (takoya) short for “takoyaki”…? Just a guess. Update: I’m right.

The licence plates say “Shinagawa”. This show takes place in Shinagawa (or the car I read the plate of was obtained in Shinagawa)!

Huh? How did Hondomachi get into the well? Do they have a drive to kill as well????

These quotes have gotta mean something, so here’s the first one: “Is it ridiculous to believe that I have been given a certain role to play for this present world?”

What’s up with the numbers in the room Matsuoka is in…? (Apparently a terrible day volunteering is enough to put me on edge and subsequently make me a master detective, it seems.)

I went back to my old Honeyfeed stories recently and I rediscovered a character that I wrote about a few years ago – Yuki, after the matching character I axed from my original plot of Half-Paid Heroes (because the story I’m referring to is the Honeyfeed version of HPH) – who was partially close-shaven like Fukuda. I gave Yuki such a character design just to set up intrigue, but I didn’t think I’d ever see a similar design to it, ever. Now, here I am.

Narihisago? What a name! I checked what “hisago” means and apparently it means “gourd”.

Is this Kaeru (the one that committed suicide), perhaps, the one in Hondomachi’s head and that’s not actually the case…?

The CGI’s a bit awkward in this show.

Is “Muku” Sakaido/Narihisago’s daughter…?

I think the old guy – the head of the cop team – uses a Mac, based on his GUI.

New quote: “Wind comes in this hole and out the other, and it makes the world a little bit clearer.” This reveals the quotes are actually from the episode.

This music which acts as the ED is nice. I’m basically sold on this show, y’know.

The original work is by “The Detectives United”. I wonder what that means…?

#simulcast commentary #ID: Invaded #no guns life #boku no hero academia #My Hero Academia #mairimashita! iruma-kun #welcome to demon school iruma kun #chesarka watches mi-k #Chesarka watches NGL #Chesarka watches BnHA #Chesarka watches ID: Invaded

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theloveliestpartsofasexuality · 6 years

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Destressor List: One Each for the Five Main Senses

So, it’s the holidays. School finals are coming up. Pretty much everyone who’ll end up reading this is probably a minority group in at least one way and has to deal with bullshit because of that.

I figure we’re all a bunch of stressed people. Therefore, here are some things you can do to relieve stress that may also even help with anxiety if you have it, like me. These are things that help me, so they won’t necessarily work for you, but it’s worth a shot.

Coloring apps:

Do you like art but don’t feel like you can create anything? Well, do you remember coloring books? There’s apps for that! For adults! There’s a plethora of pixel art apps that are basically color-by-number. I personally use Sandox because it includes a lot of pop culture stuff. The pictures can be simple or complex. Here’s some examples:

If you’re feeling more traditionally ~artsy~ there’s also apps that are pretty much coloring books. I find you can do a lot creatively on Recolor with the free tools. Here’s one picture from start to finish.

You can surprisingly add extra details with crayons. Everything you see added in the third picture was done with the crayons. They can be solid or more transparent and require a bit more patience to use since it’s more than just tapping to make color appear. It’s worth noting that the crayons are not very crayon-like. I feel that I should add that while I did used to draw kinda-sorta decently, I CANT DRAW FOR SHIT anymore because of my tremors, but I can still do stuff like that with the app (Don’t look at those flowers too closely. They look okay in the whole context of the picture but if you zoom in you can see they’re actually just squiggles, ha). The last picture looks that way not because I did anything extra to the picture but because there are filters. I finished the coloring in the third.

Hot Beverages:

During winter especially, it feels good to drink something hot. My main go to is tea. Like coffee, you may not like what you first drink, but it’s a matter of finding what flavor, strength, and level of sweetness you like. Sugar, artificial sweeteners, honey, milk/cream/coffee creamer can all be added to offset the initial bitter brew. You can find crazy amounts of detail about how to brew tea, but you don’t have to try that hard. Just don’t steep longer than ten minutes, though you can steep less. Put a microwave safe mug full of water in a microwave for two minutes. Put the tea bag or infuser in the water to steep. Bam, tea. There’s floral tea, fruity tea, earthy tea, herbal tea, whatever flavors you think might sound good as a hot beverage and more. You can find caffeine free tea easily, but even the strongest teas typically have less than half the caffeine found in a home brewed cup of coffee. Here’s a graph:

You can also go for hot chocolate(try homemade, it’s ridiculously good), hot apple cider(add cinnamon if you want), and decaf coffee. When it comes to coffee, if you want to relax, it has to be decaf.

Fuzzy Things:

When you’re feeling stressed, fuzzy things can be great, especially if they’re warm. Personally, I think the best option is a warm furry friend, but warm furry friends are not available to everyone. However, blankets are also great, and they do not have to necessarily be fuzzy if you’re not into that. You can sit and read on your phone (or scroll through Tumblr) or get a physically there book, watch Netflix/Hulu/cable/whatever you have. Pillows are a welcome addition. Heated blankets are awesome because w a r m t h, and if you’re a person who menstruates, it doubles as a way to ease cramps. On top of all that, you can also have a warm furry friend keep you company if you have one. Or any friend. Maybe even a human friend, why not, let’s gets crazy here.

Bake ALL of the Goods:

I already did taste with the hot beverages, and this is technically a heavy taste thing, but my favorite part of baking is probably the smell(especially bread. You wouldn’t believe how good homemade bread smells). Cookies are an easy one that most people enjoy the smell of and I could give you all SO MANY recipes. Like, you have no idea how many recipes I have. It’s ridiculous. You don’t need many tools for most cookie recipes, not even a hand mixer. In fact, sometimes you can’t use a hand mixture if the cookie dough is too thick. The catch is that you will have to give up on using a spoon near the end and dig your hands into it. No kneading techniques are necessary, but your hands are gonna go in the dough. If you cannot stand the way dough feels, then I’d recommend getting someone to finish mixing the dough for you or get already prepared dough. For a lot of people, however, dough is actually kinda fun to play with.

Here is my comparatively easy, completely unhealthy, absolutely amazing Super Secret Family Recipe for chocolate chip cookies. The base of this recipe can be found on the back of a Nestle chocolate chips bag, but if you compare the two, you’ll notice this one has been...modified.

Baking tools you absolutely need: two large bowls, measuring cups and spoons, baking sheet, something to mix wet(first six) ingredients. May use a large spoon, hand mixer, or stand mixer.

1 cup sugar

1 cup brown sugar (packed)

2/3 cup shortening (Crisco)

2/3 cup butter (1 1/2 sticks, softened)

2 eggs

2 teaspoons vanilla

3 1/2 cups flour

1 teaspoon salt

1 teaspoon baking soda (not powder!)

1 bag of Semi-sweet chocolate chips

1.) Preheat oven 375F or 190C

2.) In a large bowl, mix both sugars, shortening, butter, eggs, and vanilla together.

(Your butter needs to be soft. You may simply leave it out and let it come to room temperature or you may microwave it. Both ways work most efficiently if butter is cut into tabs. If you microwave, be careful! Don’t melt it. Microwave no more than 10 seconds at a time.)

3.) Sift flour, salt, and baking soda together in a separate large bowl.

(To sift, put all the ingredients in the bowl, then you may gently shake the bowl and/or whisk it. I shake the bowl, my grandma used a whisk. Both work fine.)

4.) Pour the dry (ingredients from number 3) ingredients into the wet and mix.

(It is easiest to do this by pouring the dry ingredients by roughly a third of the entire thing at a time. This is the point at which you should stop using a mixer, though you can keep using a large spoon until it becomes too difficult to do so. Mix the ingredients with your hands.)

5.) Fold in however many chocolate chips you want into the dough. I use about half a bag, but you can always use more or less based on your preference.

6.) Form balls of dough roughly one inch thick. You can use your hands, two spoons, or a cookie scooper(easiest). Place on baking sheet a couple inches apart. Bake for 9-12 minutes.

Yields: about 3-3 1/2 dozen cookies. Might give you four dozen if no one eats any cookie dough, I don’t know, never tried that.

Unfortunately, despite how many times I’ve made this, I don’t have a picture of cookies where I followed this recipe. I do, however, have one where I didn’t have shortening and substituted for another 2/3 cup of butter, totaling 3 sticks of butter. If you follow the recipe, the cookies will look similar, but less smooth than these:

If you have any questions or want a different recipe, ask away or DM me. If you’re uncertain about how your dough is turning out, send me a picture and I will be able to tell you how to fix the dough if it needs fixing. Don’t worry, I have corrected every mistake you could fathom with this specific recipe. You won’t be bothering me with questions. In fact, I would love to help out with it. Send me pictures of the resulting cookies, if you’d like!

Music:

So, I’m a musician. Like, I study music education at a college known for their fine arts program. My main method of trying to relax and relieve anxiety always involves music. I do a lot of playing music, but listening to music is the most relaxing thing. My advice here is to branch out and try new music. Even music you’ve never considered before. We have over a thousand years worth of music that you can still listen to today, with endless variations, from all over the world, and you’d never run out of new music.

Listen to songs in languages you don’t understand. And no, I don’t just mean K-pop, though obviously that counts. People make music in every language you can think of. Music is one of the only constants in human history. There’s music for every emotion you can think of and some music paints pictures in your head if the performer is skilled enough. You don’t even need words to do that, either. It can make you feel things just with sound, if it’s good enough. I would recommend songs, but I would need to make a master list, honestly. If you want a starting point, you can give me an emotion, a genre, a time period, a language, a favorite instrument/voice type, and/or any other criteria and I can find something for you.

#lgbtqia #lgbt #not an asexual problem #stress #anxiety #destress #little things #long post #baking #coloring #music #mental health #fun things #you can tell im not a very tactile person

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lookwhatilost · 6 years

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swissless swiss mac and cheese: a spite motivated recipe

so i guess internet recipe etiquette involves writing a drawn out story about what inspired the recipe, or what relative you stole it from, or whatever. i know that nobody cares abt stuff like that, so i’m going to keep the context short and sweet and get waste 17 paragraphs on troubleshooting instead

mac and cheese is a preposterously simple dish, but almost no one seems to know how to make it well. i dnt know if people dnt have taste, or if bad advice jst keeps being regurgitated to them or what, but i’m at the point where i’m always really skeptical of homemade mac and cheese unless i’ve tasted that person’s cooking before, because i’ve had so many unfortunate experiences with it. usually i’ll make it myself for thanksgiving, but my stepsisters’s cousin insisted on bringing it this year. it was foul, like, sincerely the worst. bland, dry, questionable pasta choice, rly jst every potential fuckup that one could potentially commit. my thanksgiving dinner was jst a huge plate of grilled mushrooms bc my usual dish was no longer an option. i felt robbed so it finally motivated me to throw this together. sometimes you jst need to eat something gross to put things into perspective, and push you to refine your cooking skills a little further.

i dnt like to share my rly good recipes bc i want to maintain the illusion that i am some kind of untouchable kitchen deity, but i’ve decided to leak this one as an act of community service.

the base sauce (bechamel) without the wine and nutmeg is what i always use for mac and cheese: 3 cups of bechamel to 2 cups of cheese with a pound of pasta. you can modify it with whatever cheeses you see fit.

some general advice with mac and cheese:

you’re going to get the best results if you serve it immediately and dnt bake it. this is probably one of the only foods i can think of where the texture is more important than the taste itself, and if the sauce is too thick, it’s going to taste dry and have a weird mouth feel. most people go wrong by putting it in the oven for too long. dnt do that. if you’re insistent on having a baked breadcrumb layer on top, then dnt keep it in the oven any longer than 5 minutes or so. any longer will compromise the creaminess. this recipe has a pretty big yield, so if you have to refrigerate leftovers, add a little milk when you heat them back up.

if it doesn’t taste cheesy enough, it’s because there’s not enough salt in it. i promise. salt it and then taste test it again. if you add more cheese, you risk making the sauce too thick.

the salt you use makes a difference. iodized salt is good for baking, or adding a pinch of it to something a little bit under-seasoned, but it can add a weird metallic taste to food if you cook with it. i usually use kosher salt, or sea salt, or that stupid pink salt that my mom always used to insist on buying, depending on what’s available to me. if you dnt have kosher salt or can’t rationalize purchasing it, then cut the portion in half to avoid cyborg mac.

the age of the cheese you use is going to be one of the biggest factors in the taste. usually the longer it ages, the cheesier it tastes, but the taste profiles of aged cheese are obviously dependent on the cheese you use. it helps to read up on them when you’re hashing out cheese choices and flavor combinations. i personally always use at least two cheeses, so before i pick them out, i make sure the ages of the cheeses have similar or complimentary taste profiles. it’s a lifesaver. w cheddar specifically, i never use one that’s been aged less than 9 months.

pasta choice is a big part of it. wagon wheels are usually my go-to, but rotini looks a little bit more sophisticated if you’re serving this to other people. shells are a little bit more obvious, but effective. i like to shoot for something that has a lot of external surface texture so the cheese sauce adheres to it better. elbow macaroni and penne dnt live up to my standard, personally, but if you wanna use one of those, get something that’s ribbed. same goes for cellentani. pipette works a little better. dnt bother with rigatoni, campanelle or farfalle. dnt use spaghetti unless you want to look like an idiot.

garlic helps. i almost never omit garlic when i’m making mac and cheese unless i’m going for something sweeter (dnt knock it til you try it). unless i want something with a more noticeable garlic taste, i put two cloves in. dnt let me tell you how much garlic to use, though. we all know that garlic is measured with the soul.

skim milk is actually your best bet. when you’re making bechamel, it’ll thicken significantly when you melt the cheese into it. skim milk usually gives you an ideal creamy consistency. whole milk is too thick. fat free milk gives you something a lot thinner, but if you’re making the sauce in advance, it’s a helpful workaround for when the sauce inevitably thickens in the refrigerator.

kind of a given, but if you’re cooking with beer or wine, always read the tasting notes unless it’s something you’re familiar with. dry white wines work best in recipes like this, but a lot of them have strong citrus notes and the acidity can be overpowering. i run into the problem a lot with pinot grigio. same goes with beers––it should accentuate the taste, not dominate it. if you’re not sure, mix a tiny bit in and taste test. it’s a lot of taste testing.

you dnt have to waste your money. if you’re experimenting with fancy cheeses that you typically find on cheese plates, keep in mind that a lot of the reason why you only ever seem to see them on cheese plates is bc they’re best in small doses. this isn’t to say avoid them entirely, but unless you cut them with havarti, jack, swiss, etc, the end result is barely edible when the flavor is that concentrated. dnt let this be discouraging, but i’ve mostly found that the more accessible, available cheeses produce better end results, and never puts me in a position where i blew $11 on a piece of cheese and ended up throwing most of it out. that’s always discouraging. the only things you should definitely stay away from is mozzarella (eat one mozzarella stick to find out why) and brie (i know it seems like a good idea but pls take my word for it)

notes on this recipe specifically:

on gruyere and fontina: my main objective here was to highlight some of the nuttier flavors in the cheese (and wine!) without actually putting ground up nuts into the sauce. younger gruyere tends to have nuttier notes, so does older fontina, but older fontina is kind of difficult to find in general, let alone for a reasonable price. i picked up a 5 month gruyere for this, and hardest block of fontina i could find in the store, which only ended up being aged 3 months. not ideal, but it worked out fine.

on raclette: not gnna mince words, it smells terrible. dnt let that scare you. when it’s mixed w the garlic and the other cheeses, it’s fine. it’s kind of difficult to find too. i got mine at wegman’s, but if you’re outside of the mid atlantic, that’s not an option. if it’s too elusive or if you’re sensitive to smell, emmental is a less elusive, less offensive substitute with a similar taste.

on the wine: aim for something with notes of honey or almonds or hazelnuts. i used beaulieu vineyard carneros chardonnay 2015

ingredients:

1 1/2 cups gruyere, shredded

3/4 cup fontina, shredded

1/4 cup raclette, take a wild guess

2 cloves of garlic, minced

1/2 cup butter

1/2 cup flour

3 cups of milk

1/4 cup chardonnay

2 tsp kosher salt (or 1 tsp iodized salt)

1 tsp nutmeg

1lb rotini

green apple slices (optional)

and without any further bullshit, here’s how you make it:

cook the pasta until its a little less than al dente––a minute or two less than the box instructions dictate. strain it and put it off to the side

heat up the milk over medium heat for abt 4 minutes, until it starts to bubble (NOT BOIL) a little bit. remove it from the heat.

in a different pot, melt the butter over medium heat and add the flour. whisk it until it’s light brown. usually this only takes a minute or two.

gradually pour in the milk, abt a half cup at a time and continue to whisk it. when all the milk is in the mixture. keep whisking it until the consistency is similar to gravy. this usually takes abt 2 minutes.

add the wine, keep whisking until you get the gravy consistency back

add the salt, garlic, and nutmeg.

add the cheeses and stir until they’ve barely melted

slowly add the cooked pasta and stir it continuously until the pasta is steaming. usually this only takes a couple minutes, but it depends on how warm the pasta is when you add it

spoon it into some bowls, garnish it with the apple slices and a little bit more nutmeg if you want. or skip garnishing it and jst dip the apple slices into the sauce. surprisingly good.

i dnt know what actually defines a serving, but if you’re using it as a main dish, it should feed four people. or jst one if you try your hardest. whatever works

#food stuff #tbh if you take my word w any one thing #it should be mac and cheese recipes #that's the only thing i'm truly good at

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