#so now we're on second option to keep the house and tomorrow that process starts and i will find out soon if THAT'S possible!!!!!!!!!!!
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the adult horror conversation with yourself of 'i could have tortillas with dinner tonight. i just had tortillas the other day. that's okay. i can, in fact, have tortillas again! i am putting a different filling in them! but if i have these tortillas, i will have a total of six tortillas left in the freezer. eventually i will have to buy more tortillas. by god, girl, you are allowed to eat the things you have in the freezer, instead of feeling like you have to save them for some potential eventuality so you don't run out of them, and like, what situation are you even imagining where the tortillas would be better to have later instead of for this particular dinner??? if you keep feeling like you have to save them for Something you will just not eat the tortillas!! eventually EVERYTHING runs out and you have to buy more of them!! that is the way the world works!! you are allowed to not have things aggressively stockpiled, except for like, tissues, but that was a purchasing incident on mom's card while she was still here, so you just happen to have, a bizarre amount of tissue boxes. AND WHILE YOUR FINANCES ARE STILL BIG RED QUESTION MARKS, YOU CAN, IN FACT, AFFORD TO GO BUY MORE TORTILLAS IF YOU FUCKING WANT TO!!! YOU GET THE STREET TACO SIZE AND THEY'RE LIKE $2.99!!!!! AND WHEN DID YOU EVEN BUY THESE TORTILLAS, HUH???????? YOU DON'T KNOW, DO YOU???? WHICH MEANS YOU HAVE GONE THROUGH THE TORTILLAS AT AN ACCEPTABLE PACE!! WHATEVER THE HELL THAT SENTENCE MEANS!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!'
anyway i'm eating the tortillas. or i mean they're on the counter defrosting while i have some chicken toasting in the toaster oven
#adulting is going soooooooo normally i tell you WHAT#first option of how to keep the house is going to fall through (or well it's not long-term sustainable)#so now we're on second option to keep the house and tomorrow that process starts and i will find out soon if THAT'S possible!!!!!!!!!!!#aaaaaaaaaand if not! then! well!!! will have to move. some places i have an eye on but it's also. Thousand Yard Stare#i got a projected electricity bill -- that was A+ i was so pleased with it!! not bad at all!!! sooo much lower than i was assuming. yay.#BUT THE GAS BILL MADE ME GO 'ARE YOU FUCKING FOR REAL??????'#FIRST OFF LOCAL GAS COMPANY IT'S NOT MY FAULT IF YOUR METER READER CAN'T TRUDGE THROUGH THE SNOW TO THE BACKYARD#AND IS ESTIMATING 100 UNITS HIGHER THAN PREVIOUS USAGE WHICH I'M SURE MAKES A DIFFERENCE#THERE ARE PEOPLE LOCALLY WHO KEEP THEIR HEATER ON 60 BTW AND YOU'RE STILL CHARGING THEM $300 WHICH AT LEAST YOU AREN'T CHARGING ME BUT DAMN#this area is having a bit of a Time with gas and electric bills. it's a whole Thing. mostly i have luckily escaped that.#/crosses self for good luck even if it does NOT work that way and i am Not religious by ANY means#also they're breaking up a security deposit over 3 months bc i didn't have any other real bills in my name when i switched all the bills#(at least the gas was the only one that wanted a security deposit. and they'll give it back to me in a year if i'm current for a year.)#(but also. rrrrrrrrrrude)#so i was expecting that but also a specific budget billing but they are asking for moreeeee than i thought they would!#mostly this is a jan-march issue. after march at least it'll go down like $90. which is better but also. still. sigh.#idk if i should call and argue about the reading. i should just let it go probably. i don't like it but. well. idk.#WELL I GOTTA GET THROUGH TOMORROW FIRST.#AND BEFORE THAT. TONIGHT. AND MY TORTILLAS.
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