#so now he has. literal crocs. also cause it looks better than even more snakes on the hind legs
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redstonebug · 1 year ago
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creeper, goat, butterfly - hear me out.
Kampe Doc, like the dragon lady monster from Greek mythology with the random ton of heads of beasts around her neck and waist and hundreds of snakes on her feet. Make Doc weirder.
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gsmatthews95 · 6 years ago
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Oz: a recap
The time has come. It has been ten months in waiting but it had to come. It is with a slight twinge of sadness but an overpowering sense of excitement and happiness that I am leaving Australia on my way to Singapore. Which  is actually pretty ideal because I have a nice long 9 hour layover. There are very few occasions I would describe a 9 hour layover as "ideal" but this is one of them. Such a cool city. So much to do and see. And, apparently, it isn't even too big. So I'm hoping I should be able to DO/COMPLETE Singapore in a nice six hour stint, tick it off my list, add another pin to the map and tell everyone about how I've now basically completed Asia. Sick eh?. A wee bit more background before I delve into the meat of this potentially juicy post which I think I will compare to a fat fillet steak by comparison to the rest of my posts that I would say are more like coles BBQ sausages, 24 for $8... good value but not much substance. A good reference I reckon. So I'm currently on my flight. It is maybe 9am Aussie time and I am awake, not that tired, with very little to do in this flight as I went for the lost budget option (still pretty expenny). You have to pay 11 bucks for films, Ye right. Go do one scoot airlines. Urgh, absolute scandal for a 7 hour flight. No worries however. Gives me ample time to write an absolute Goliath of a blog post. Okay seriously guys stop cheering. It's distracting me and my brain flow you have to pay for food and entertainment. Not good. However, the there are two upsides to this flight with nothing to do, firstly it allows me to blog blog blog and the other upside of this prehistoric flight comfort is that it gives me a chance to register to Stephen Hawkins "a  brief history of time", what a bangin audiobook. Well bloody confusing but I feel cleverer listening to it. Although in the last nine months I have forgotten the vast, vast majority of it. All the better it's like a new book. I'm now not that excited however about my connecting flight to Berlin. 14 hours. 13 hours of no films, just sleep, urgh lame. I may find some more wee audiobooks. I'll tell you what, I may get the game Of thrones ones. They'd be immense, especially as I'm now a proper game of thrones loser (read loser as legend/fanatic).
This is what I mean, I have so much time to ramble this piece is gonna drag. Oo I have an idea. As I didn't have this blog for the majority of the trip should I go back and wrote posts for them? Hmmmm, that does kinda defeat the point of the blog though. I don't think I'll do that. the other nagging question is whether I carry on the blog for the next 3 months as I galavant around Europe. I think I should. You're welcome guys. I love you all too. Also sick that I'm using my British passport to its full extent before we F off out of Europe as part of brexit. Wooo freedom of movement. Cosmopolitan ideals, something we should probs all strive for as much as possible. However, I do think we probs made the right decision leaving the EU as most people who have spoken to me about it will know. This post is not about my political views however. Otherwise it would not be called holidaying. Maybe something like #Jezza4PM would be a better name for it if I were to become a political blogger slash activist. But I digress.
So as many of you may have gauged from speaking to me, reading this blog or merely by observing my Facebook presence. I have had an immense time. Even though my article about the ups and downs of travelling may have seemed a bit depressing, I can safely say the last ten months, yes that ten months, a long time, have been smashing. I am currently conflicted, in poor stylistic technique I have embarked upon this post without a plan. And now I am at a crossroads. Do I continue chronologically or thematically? I think I will stay true to convincing writing styles and go thematically. Let's push the boat out he he. Ok ok ok so I'll start with my hostels. I believe I do want to talk about them a little bit first.  To start, I have been in lots. Off the top of my head in Sydney alone I was in 7 separate hostels. Many for a week as I was forced to move because of the price increase, my bed being sold, being chucked out etc. But 3 main ones. Firstly, hump. What to say about this place. A mad house, a good outside smoking area, a room that stays open all night and a lot of sound people who I've seen since leaving Sydney too. One jack gawthorpe, I've seen in four separate places (who's stalking who...). My month or so there was heavy. There was always something going on, I have very fond memories. Secondly, dury house. As described by James, my friend who I took there one night: "that was literally a crack den". Yes James, but it was our crack den. With the roof that never closed and the never ending session, there was always something going on, whether it be 11am on a Sunday morning or 4am on a Friday night. And again some belter people, who again I've seen down the east coast. Thirdly, finally, and ultimately we had the palms. What a place. What a time. November-December 2017. The palms glory days. Clean hostel, nice kitchen, comfy beds, sound people, like a giant sharehouse it had the intimate feel that you knew everyone but was big enough to still be lots of fun. The palms massive made my first xmas away from home so fun and so comforting. Never forget. Loved everyone there, except dan obvs, I hate dan. Everyone else though, I love you. And the hostel. I'll give a quick shout out to bev and micks in Melbourne. Small, intimate, cosy and friendly. Not that exciting or fun but enjoyable for my three weeks. Plus it was the cheapest place around. However, barossa backpackers. Dirty, smelly, small, tiny kitchen, leaky fridges, small room, had to pay for wifi and in the middle of nowhere. Pretty crap hostel tbh. But as I was there for some time, working with and living with everyone. I had an unreal time. Even working in a potato factory. So much fun cause you're constantly with you're mates and chilling, I won't forget those few months in barossa. The hostels down the east coast were nice. Big and nice but with my motivation waiting and the fact that I was staying at each place for a few days I didn't really form much of a bond with many of them. The hostel is key to your experience. Regardless how long you are in a place for but especially if it's for the long term. And overall I think I did well with a only a few mistakes.
Work. Ok so work never went quite as I'd hoped before I came out to Australia. Maybe I was naive, maybe I just wasn't made for call centres. My one regret actually was not going in to construction in Sydney, making lots of money, doing easy work and finishing at 3:30 each day. I then could have done it all over oz as I'd have had experience and wouldn't have had to do some of my crap jobs. We live and learn, one of my bigger regrets I'd say. No hassle though, all has worked out well and I haven't been too low on money. But yes call centres and cold calling, not the job for me. Neither as it turns out is face to face fundraising. What I have learnt though is that there is no worse job than those and I now have sympathy for those doing it, I have the knowledge that I will never work in a job like that again and it has now given me a great  appreciation of any job that isn't that. Which was one reason I think I enjoyed the potatoes so much. Mainly because it was so easy and so much less depressing than my other jobs. Everyone constantly complained, I just smiled and said it could be worse. People said the job would break me. It never did. Smashing job, smashing people, smashing time. The worst of all these jobs though was the charity fundraising, I knew it would be but I just wanted 2-3 weeks work and it paid well. I lasted 1 week. Never again. The best job. Easy. Grape picking and wine making. It was so sick. I got a lot of hours, lots of free wine and food and learnt to make wine in the sun. Dream job. I even have a wine named after me, I'm gonna get a case delivered home of the 2018 vintage GSM lol. But that's enough about work after all it is a work holiday visa.
This part will be harder to split up do I discuss  specific experiences? Or parts of the journey. Oo I have an idea. Animals. I have devoted a few pieces to various animals but I haven't spoken about all of them. There are two that I will leave out though as they deserve their own piece. Australia, famous for its diverse and unique wildlife and I think I've done well in seeing a lot of it. And I got selfies with lots of them. Firstly I have fed and patted wild kangaroos and wallabies. So cute, they love carrots btw, not apples so much. One of the wallabies even had a tiny Joey in its pouch. Too much for my heart. They're great I loved em both. Then came the quokka. As many of you may have seen by my  Valentine's Day post devoted to this one. They are like giant rodents. Although they're not giant, and they're actually cute. I dunno how to describe them actually just look at my photo, well adorable. I will now move on to the dangerous segment of the list of animals, cause, as we all know, that's what oz is most famous for. Firstly, the red back spider, v venomous. Hannah (friend not sister) almost died as she entered his layer/graveyard and only just escaped with her life. I have also seen three wild snakes, woohoo. That was a real target. The python in the kitchen and the two cuties slithering across the path in Lichfield national park and the twelve (4) apostles. Now. The personal favourite. The crocs. There have been lots of crocs, none completely in the wild without a tour guide sadly, but the jumping crocs were wild and were damn sick. I even have a croc tooth necklace (sorry axel, Brutus and dominator). The one animal conspicuous by its absence I haven't seen though, sadly, a shark. Waaaaa I should have gone shark cage diving, ah it was too expensive anyway. I think I'll carry on with my sea critters vibe now for a few more. Next was the manta. MANTA MANTA MANTA. I saw lots in Indonesia but another at whitsundays. So big, graceful and noble. I love them, as everyone does, they're god personified in an animal I reckon.  I would like to be a manta ray. Next up dolphins. Not many and both times I saw them from a cliff. Not overly exciting mainly because I have been spoilt in the past both in cornwall And in the SAN blas when they swam with our boat, so very nice. My final sea dweller. Whales. Lots of humpbacks as I said in my Fraser Island piece. They are awesome, so big and majestic and loving. I would also like to be a whale. Sue me. I saw lots of camels too, they're funny I like camels teehee and dingos, they're so cute, not scary. I would like to chat to a dingo and befriend him. I love dingos. I think however, my proudest find and subsequent selfie was with the koalas. We found 8 on magnetic island. One barely 8 foot away. Perfect for a selfie. And I snapped it yay. They're such chillers too, I love koalas. I love animals actually. I also miss Rolland, I love you too Rolland!!!
So as to stop myself writing another dissertation I may make this the final para. And I'm going to try and be concise. My favourite moments. I won't describe them much but merely mention them. There's a variety of reasons why a moment could have been so great. Maybe where I was, what I was doing, who I was with. Who knows? Maybe I just felt at peace and the world felt right for a moment. Deep. And I'm not talking about every moment I sat down with a full box of goon. Ok ok seriously. The hump boat party. Both 1 and 2. Unreal, a boat party in the Sydney harbour, beers, mates, opera house, swimming, tunes, I won't ever forget those two days. My first moment seeing the extent of the blue mountains at the end of the garden of the nbb Jill and Richard had so kindly rented for us. A little ten minute walk and you were on the edge of the crator with the blue trees stretching out, I reckon I spent a couple of hours just sat there over the three days, peaceful. Sash, pretty much every sash, but one in particular when I'm pretty sure everyone I knew in Sydney was there. It was sunny and we boogied. I was having so much fun several separate people came and asked me if I sold drugs cause I was so deliriously happy. Oo also the sash it rained that was unreal, dancing in the rain with the boys, never forget. Two more from Sydney. The beach party, amazing. One of the best, if not the best day of my life. Music and goon on the beach, swimming as the sun set over the harbour bridge, so wicked. And finally xmas day. Singing for the Aussie prime minister with a broken voice having lost it the night before was something I will NEVER ever forget especially as I have the video of it all ahahahaha. We move on to mine and Hannis road trip. My first thought. The pinnacles. The pinnacles were sick, so random just a load of pointy rocks in the ground. I doubt two people have ever been so excited in one place. So funny. Also actually hannah, all of our carpool karaokes. They made your company bearable. Completing the 8km hike in kalbari was also a good moment as it was 30+ degrees and we had about two litres of water between us, stupid English. But we did it, I'm proud. Finally hanni, 100% when we chilled with Roos in morriset park for hours after Jill and richard basically laughed us down for going, v funny. A good afternoon. Days of our lives festival. Awesome, what a send off from Sydney. Dury house you did yourselves and me proud, cheers for convincing me to go xoxoxo. The whole outback trip was awesome, if I picked a few moments though... I reckon the first proper big fire was a great moment, and sorting out the car light that we couldn't turn off meaning we didn't have to take the fuse out every time we stopped the car, sheer happiness. Also getting in to alice springs. This may seem weird but I cannot explain how touchy everyone was, we needed food, civilisation, electricity, a shower and some goon. We got all of the above and spirits were restored. Also the natural springs were amazing. So beautiful, completely free and refreshing. Darwin, croc diving, easy, it was unreal. Spotting the koalas on magnetic island obvs was memorable. I want to pick some moments from Fraser but it was all so fun. If I had to pick a few though, I'd say the horse racing on the second night united everyone, we were all so into it and the crumbed sausage obvs haha. I have missed things out but when I look back on oz these are the things I feel stand out as specific moments but like I've said before travelling isn't just about the moments (sorry Alina) but the whole experience, what you feel and who you meet.
What a holiday. I am content with my time in oz. if I came back I'd change things but I'm happy just the way they went. It's been sick. Stay posted I have one more oz piece before we move to EUROPE yahoooooooo. This piece has literally killed at least two hours of my flight maybe even three. I have been very engrossed aha. But back to mr hawking for me. G.
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