#so maybe after that? ill pack my miscellaneous stuff...

[nururu]

I gotta start packing soon but..... genshin first.

[beckydoesthings]

various fics of hxl that i adore reading! this list is quite lengthy, but feel free to message me if you have any questions!

*will continue to be updated. also, if i mistagged you, i apologize, i do not know how to tumblr*

Love Is a Rebellious Bird

E | 134k | @100percentsassy and gloria_andrews

AU in which the boys still make music. Louis is the concertmaster of the London Symphony Orchestra, Harry is the New! and Exciting! interim conductor/ex-cello prodigy who "has made Mozart cool again" according to Esquire Magazine (Louis hates him immediately, which is definitely why he internet stalked him in his dark bedroom late at night that one time), and Niall is the best. Zayn and Liam are around too.

Don't hum Bolero.

i think this tickled every bone of my musical self and also made me cry (are you seeing a theme here??) one of the first fics i fell in love with and one i keep coming back to.

Collision

E | 226k | @tequiladimples

Mythology/Fairytale!AU in which Louis is a dainty fairy with a temper who wants to be intimidating and Harry hurts people. Naturally, they hate each other.

(Featuring Liam, the big and not-so-bad wolf who’s got a thing for humans, Zayn, a human with supernaturally good looks, and Niall, the cupid who just wants his job to be easier.)

the world building in this one is insanity - so much good mythology mixed in and it made me screech with joy. i think i can firmly say that i did not expect where the plot went, but that made the story so much better.

Flour and Chocolate

M | 145k | @danosphere91

It was nice, for a bakery he supposed.

Then he approached the display cabinet.

And the foreboding slammed into him. Because every product had letters next to it. Letters. GF, DF, V, O, VGN.

What. The. Fuck?

Lifting his eyes to the chalkboard menu spread across the back wall Louis felt physically ill. ‘Gluten-free’, ‘organic’, ‘vegan’, ‘paleo’, ‘dair-…’ Wait, what the fuck was a paleo? He had entered some hipster-trash establishment and it was more than time to get out.

OR

Louis is a single dad and Harry works at the newly opened bakery down the street.

the miscommunication in this fic is SO REAL and makes for a good read. the rest of the flour and chocolate series is also fantastic. i thoroughly enjoyed both the ziam and ed/niall arcs that bring the whole story together.

run away home

E | 106k | @hattalove

Louis stands, in the middle of a clearing with his hands in his pockets, and stares. This boy—God, this gorgeous, gorgeous boy. He seems so clumsy, confused at the best of times, but there’s a wisdom about him as he speaks, a maturity that belies his age.

Louis is hopelessly, wildly attracted to him.

or, louis is a successful jockey down on his luck, struggling to get his life back on track after an injury. harry has a horse, a house fit for a prince, and a broken heart.

it takes them a while to figure out that they need each other.

this makes my inner horse girl extraordinarily happy - even if i don’t know anything about horse racing. louis’ story in this is beautiful and makes the whole piece worth a read.

waiting for the tides to meet

E | 60k | @nauticalleeds

Louis lets out a deep breath, thinking about Harry’s soulmate. Thinking about how Harry’s soulmate is probably as beautiful as Harry, some person that Louis cannot compare to, and how the universe has chosen them to be Harry’s. Fuck the universe. “Fuck you,” he calls out to the universe. He’s aware of how crazy he sounds.

Maybe he is crazy, with how he’s falling for Harry. And fuck that, too.

Soulmate AU. Everyone is born with heterochromia — one eye is their own eye colour, while the other is the colour of their soulmate's. It's only when they meet their soulmate for the first time that their own eyes match properly. After a hazy night at a frat party, Louis wakes up to blue eyes and the shocking realization that he had met his soulmate, without any sober recollection. Seven years pass where Louis comes to terms with the fact that he'll never know who his soulmate is. Then one fated summer, a beautiful green-eyed photographer arrives at Louis' workplace, with promises of endless laughter and a familiar feeling in Louis' heart.

Featuring a lovely cup of OT5, a road trip down the coast, and a scene where Harry eats a whole head of lettuce. Don't ask why.

gorgeous soulmate AU that gives me summer cruising vibes. worth the read for the lettuce scene alone (i kid, i kid)

Do Not Go Gentle

E | 70k | @afirethatcannotdie

“This is all a game to you, isn’t it? Well, it’s not for me. This is a real life or death situation,” Louis says, spitting the words at him. “And I just don’t think you’re cut out for it.”

For a moment, they stare at each other in complete silence. Harry can feel his blood thrumming between his ears, can see Louis glaring at him, feels red-hot anger. And then all he feels, oppressively and desperately, is lust.

Suddenly Louis is surging up to him to press his lips against Harry’s. Harry walks the two of them backwards, pressing Louis back against the door. Louis oomphs in surprise and brings his hands under Harry’s scrub top, scratching at his lower back.

“Lock — oh — lock the… fucking door,” Louis mutters.

When Harry Styles starts his first day as a surgical intern, he expects a lot of things: to treat patients, to observe a surgery, to feel a bit overwhelmed. What he definitely doesn't expect, however, is that the handsome guy he kicked out of his bed this morning is also an intern.

A Grey’s Anatomy AU where tensions are high, Harry and Louis are hooking up in secret, and no one has time for love. Or do they?

okay i’ve watched maybe 3 episodes of Gray’s Anatomy, but i feel like this encompasses the vibe of the show: medical stuff with a hefty dose of angst and sexual tension

Falling For Me Won’t Be A Mistake

M | 58k | @all-these-larrythings

Harry is married to his job and so overworked that he doesn't know how to stop. All it takes is a forced Hawaiian get-a-away, the warm tropical breeze of the island, and the most beautiful, elusive man he's ever seen to make him remember what living is like outside of work. Well, that, and the little souvenir he accidentally takes home with him.

one of my favorite mpreg fics so if that’s not your cup of tea, then don’t read it. i love surgeon harry with a vengeance, but honestly Gems and Niall are iconic in this one.

Watching the World Fall

E | 11k | @crazyupsetter why won’t it let me tag :(

This segment has been going on long enough that Louis knows what’s coming before James starts in on it, trying to sell him on something he knows that Louis wouldn’t normally be buying. But there’s four cameras surrounding him, and an audience watching him expectantly, so if Louis wants to continue convincing people that he’s doing just fine, he’s going to have to go along with it.

“We have a whole host of single men backstage waiting to meet you, Louis,” James tells him. “We want to help you find love tonight, on Late Late Live Tinder. Is this okay? Do you want to play?”

It actually kind of makes sense that his first date after the break-up is going to be just as public as said break-up. Something like coming full circle.

“Alright, James,” Louis agrees, hopping down off his stool.

“Okay, come down to the stage,” James says. Louis can’t even tell whether the excitement in his voice is genuine or not. “Right now, come on down!”

i have a soft spot the size of Antarctica for Late Late AU fics (we stan James Corden) and for exes to lovers so this checks all the boxes.

autumn leaves

E | 27k | @suspendrs

“Brave?” Harry frowns, caught off guard. “No, not particularly.”

“You seem brave,” Louis decides, pushing off the wall and stepping on the butt of his cigarette. “You are strong, and you are not mean. That’s good,” he assures, touching Harry’s arm gently.

“Thank you, but that’s not true,” Harry smiles ruefully. “I’m really not anything special.”

Or, Harry is an American soldier in France during World War II, and Louis is a French waiter that doesn't mean to fall in love with him.

love love french AUs and while this one isn’t sunshine and rainbows, it’s a beautiful yet heart wrenching piece. warning for period typical homophobia

caught up in your love affair

NR | 8k | @disgruntledkittenface

“And the corgis took to you straightaway,” Harry remarks.

“That’s true,” Louis chuckles.

 “I’ve spent the last 29 years being barked at,” Harry deadpans, jerking his hand toward Louis, “this one walks in, absolutely nothing.”

Louis outright giggles at that, saying, “They were just lying on my feet during tea.”

“Wagging tails,” Harry says, shaking his head.

“It’s because they don’t understand flirting,” Louis tells him, “you can’t charm them the way you do everyone else.”

Royal AU. Prince Harry announces his engagement to Louis Tomlinson in an interview with longtime friend and BBC host Nick Grimshaw. Inspired by Prince Harry and Meghan Markle.

just. 8k of royal fluff. that’s literally it and i adore it so much.

Apples Always Fall (As I Do For You)

M | 54k | @rainbowsandgucci

”Due to unforeseen circumstances, help is needed here at the orchard for the impending apple season. Looking for someone able to start within the next week or two at the most, is willing to do whatever miscellaneous tasks are needed, such as picking & packing apples, running the cash register, and other handywork that may need to be done. Must be good with customers, and able to lift up to 50lbs. Help will be needed until at the least the end of October. Please contact the number found on this page, or come out to the orchard and ask for Harry. All the love xx” --- Louis is staying at his Aunt's farm in a small town in Minnesota for four months. To deal with the boredom that sets in a week into his stay, he starts working at the local apple orchard, owned by twenty six year old Harry Styles. Louis quickly finds himself falling in love with the orchard, and he finds a family in Harry's friends Niall, Liam, and Zayn. He also starts to fall in love with Harry. Falling in love with him turns out to be the easy part.

i never thought i would enjoy an apple orchard fic?? but it’s so good?? farmer harry makes me laugh to think about, but the heartbreak in this fic is so. real.

Mine Would Be You

E | 114k | @crinkle-eyed-boo

Louis blinks his eyes open, his eyelids fluttering as the room swims around him. He takes several gulps of beer once he confirms that he’s definitely not hallucinating, that the very first portrait Harry Styles ever painted of him is hanging on that wall.

Louis stares at the wall, his heart jackrabbiting in his chest as he realizes that there’s not just one painting of him, there’s five, the portraits lined up like they’re some sort of storyboard depicting the rise and fall of his deepest love. His greatest heartache. A pain that cut him so deep that he left the fucking country, severing all ties with his life in New York, now suddenly surrounding him as if he’d never left.

Fucking shit motherfucker fuck.

Louis returns to New York City five years after he left it – and the love of his life – behind. He didn't intend to see Harry again, but fate has a funny way of pulling them together, whether they like it or not. After making a begrudging truce, they both start to wonder: Would it be so bad if history repeated itself?

exes to lovers drama but make it extra sad. the fact that we see so many facets to this story just makes it all the more painful, yet beautiful. this fic also reminds me of how much i love one mister niall horan.

One for Luck

E | 96k | @leavingonatrain

The very first time Louis remembers hearing Harry Styles' deep, deep voice, he's just won gold at the World Equestrian Games and he's officially back on Great Britain's Olympic team. He's also three sheets to the wind, drunk on victory and champagne, and there's a gorgeous boy whispering in his ear. Life's grand.

(AU: Louis and Harry are professional riders on the British Olympic team.)

again, i know nothing about horses, but i like to pretend i do for the sake of this fic. it’s beautiful, it’s smutty what else could you ask for?

Nothing But You On My Mind

E | 83k | @absoloutenonsense

Louis Tomlinson is a PR manager hired to improve the image of royal bad-boy Prince Harry Styles. Unfortunately for him, that means being faced with the Prince's constant innuendos, incessant dirty jokes, and relentless flirting. Louis just wants to make it to Princess Gemma's coronation; once she's crowned Queen, his contract is up and he never has to see the Prince again.

i absolutely. definitely. sobbed tears at this fic. it’s just so beautifully painful to read. don’t want to spoil anything, but this is a must.

Adore You

M | 67k | @isthatyoularry

“We invited our new acquaintances from uptown. You’ve simply got to meet their oldest son!” said his mother with a flourish, and suddenly it became abundantly clear as to why his parents had so adamantly demanded he join them in Deansville for the entirety of the summer.

Against his wishes, Harry spends the holidays at his family’s summer estate, and is reluctantly pulled into a courtship he didn’t ask for. Harry doesn’t want to get married, but Louis does. They don’t fit, but then again they really, really do.

Vaguely set in the 1920’s. Headpieces, jazz, fashionable canes, and flapper dresses, and that.

i strongly relate to harry in this one! one of my favorite historical AUs and honestly i love the thought of louis in well fitting suits.

leave it to the breeze

E | 81k | @hattalove

Louis couldn’t be prouder of his bake, but there’s something—there’s something. Something about Harry Styles and the earnest way he measures, pours, mixes, scrapes. Something about the tip of his tongue poking out of his mouth as he knocks the air out of his batter.

or a great british bake off au in which louis cares about winning and winning only, harry is made of sunshine and rainbow sprinkles, and niall sticks his nose into other people's business. also featuring liam as louis's best friend-slash-concerned mother, and zayn as a macaron connoisseur.

i. love. the. great british baking show. baking + h&l is amazing. and another reminder as to why niall is the absolute best.

Paint The Sky With Stars

M | 62k | @icanhazzalou grrr let me tag

On 10 April 1912, Harry Styles boards the finest ship the world has ever seen. Still grieving the death of their mother, he and his sister are being sent to America to live with a callous uncle who cares more about his business connections than family. Harry prepares himself for a long, disappointing voyage alone in his stateroom.

Louis Tomlinson has borrowed and saved, and finally has enough to purchase a Third Class ticket to America. With all of his belongings in a single ruck sack, he boards the Titanic filled with hope for a brighter future. Never one to sit still, he can’t resist exploring the massive ship, and soon goes sneaking into First Class in a stolen steward’s uniform.

By a twist of fate, Louis finds himself in Harry’s stateroom, entranced by the most attractive man he’s ever laid eyes on. He keeps returning day after day, even if he doesn’t understand what it is about Harry that continues pulling him in. That’s all right; Louis has a week to figure it out, and Harry is plenty willing to help.

Except they don’t have a week. They have four days. Because on 15 April, their entire world will be turned upside down.

Or, the historically accurate Titanic AU with a happy ending.

gorgeous historical fic that’s so accurate and painstakingly written. i keep coming back to it!

When It’s Late At Night

M | 25k | @all-these-larrythings

Louis has zero interest in an ex-boybander turned solo artist when his appearance on the show gets announced, but that's exactly who he gets stuck with when Harry Styles shows up at the Late Late show to promote the release of his debut album. For an entire fucking week.

Or

The Late Late prompt that we all need to get through this excruciatingly hard time.

remember when i said i love Late Late AUs? yeah. i love that louis gives absolutely zero shits in this fic until he gives all the shits.

Chasing Empty Spaces

E | 79k | @domestic-harry

The year is 1934 and Harry Styles was to inherent the largest tobacco firm in the south. His parents have picked out the “perfect” girl for him to marry and he has the privilege of receiving the highest education possible. The problem was, Harry hadn’t realized he didn’t actually want any part of that future until he met a mechanic named, Louis Tomlinson.

gorgeous historical AU that goes through Harry’s struggle with his sexuality wonderfully. this one also made me cry.

Resist Everything Except Temptation

E | 100k | @domestic-harry

The lethargic sound of heels clicking against wood resonated across the sea. Footsteps descended the staircase, every assured step creating a menacing aura as it grew closer. Perspiration gathered along Louis’ palms as the rhythmic sound halted in front of him.

“Captain,” Malik greeted.

Louis watched out of his peripheral as Malik’s boots shuffled back a few steps. Sweat matted the hair along the nape of Louis’ neck as he waited for something to happen. He felt as if a sharp blade was twisting his gut as the silence became tangible. There was a metallic slide of a sword being pulled out of its sheath, the sound startling Louis out of his cocoon of sterile shock. His shoulders jumped as the tip of a blade flattened underneath his jaw. Louis’ distorted reflection stared back at him in the polished metal. Engraved rose petals twisted his appearance as they crawled up the length of the sword. The sword lifted and took Louis’ chin with it.

Standing in front of Louis was Captain Styles.

OR

The one where Louis is the commodore's son who is forced to become a part of Harry's crew when he is captured.

love this pirate AU that’s got one badass gemma styles. also, harry as a super cool pirate in gorgeous clothes makes me super happy!

i’ll make this feel like home

E | 49k

Harry to groans himself and then takes a deep breath. “Okay, well. Here’s the thing. I peed on a stick.”

Louis isn’t able to get more than a shocked “What!” out before Harry’s steamrolling on.

“I peed on a stick and it says it’s positive, but you always prattle on about how it’s best to go to the doctor’s before you get excited, you know to confirm it because sometimes hormones are off or you have like a tumor or some shit and get false positives and what if I’m dying and-”

“You’re pregnant?!” Louis shouts out, stomach dropping as the words leave his mouth.

“Um, yeah… maybe.”

[the one where Louis' hopelessly in love with his best mate... who just happens to be pregnant with another man's baby.]

baby momma harry with hot mess!Louis is a recipe for disaster, but this one has plenty of fluff to make up for it.

Hands Clasped Tight

E | 44k | @afirethatcannotdie

“What am I looking at here?” Harry asks.

“This, my friends, is a ‘proof’ Instagram account, run by your students,” Liam announces.

“It’s got all this stuff about how the two of you are together,” Niall adds.

“I heard about that,” says one of the math teachers. “Confiscated a kid’s phone today when they were looking at it. I have to say, the evidence that you’re dating is pretty damning.”

“Really,” Louis says dryly. “Do you think being married for three years might have something to do with it?”

Or the one where Harry and Louis are high school teachers and their students have been playing matchmaker for over a year. Little do they know, Harry and Louis are already married.

love love teacher harry and louis that’s mostly funny fluff with a little angst. just a teeny amount. reminds me of my own experiences with meddling students haha.

*updated 2/16/21*

[tumblunni]

MORE UPDATES ON THINGS WHAT HAPPEN

The half week milestone of the hospital house thingie time! I think the term they use for it is "a residential stay"? Cos like its not a hospital its a shared housing block thats just full of doctors. I get to sleep in a real bed and there's a nice community room and board game nights and stuff. But its still really scary how intense the supervision can be! Like they have a window to look into your room once per hour every hour constantly. And they have to go through your undies and catalog them as part of the possessions check. I was not warned about that and it was mega embarassing trying to explain a binder to a bunch of old lady doctors! Oh and i had yo do a urine test today which was possibly the most fuckin embarassing thing in the actual universe. And you're not even allowed to take your own pills! They keep them locked in a big ominous wall of lockers and you have to come into the office and swallow the pill while theyre watching. I guess maybe because some people might be faking their illness and selling their pills on the black market or whatever? But that literally doesnt happen with antidepressants, they have no 'high' or even any effect at all on non-sick people. So it just makes no sense to me and its real embarassing cos like i said i suck at taking pills with plain water and without a straw. The ones i take are real damn chunky things the size of my thumbnail! I think i'l get better at not (literally) choking under pressure over time, tho. Hopefully.

Anyway that's all the bad out of the way! Now the good and the neutral and the just miscellaneous!

Its still nervewracking having to shower in a shared house but they have a cool walk-in shower and ive never tried one of those so it was vaguely interesting. And im allowed to take my showers early at 6am to minimize the chance of anyone else trying to use the door, lol. My biggest fear is having some staff member walk in on me when im naked like back in that homeless hostel. Oh or that time in the homeless hostel where the teenage boys filled the entire bathroom with inflated condoms wall to wall. Like wow so much damn effort to prank the stupid nervous bunni who probably would have been embarassed by literally anything else. Man this place is bringing so many memories of that homeless hostel but at least this time its a place specifically for sick people and they know i'm anxious doing shared cooking and board games and whatever so they dont make fun of me for it. But in a lot of ways that hostel had more freedoms too.. *shrug*

Anyway! A good! I get to have cooking lesson!! I know literally nothing about cooking and now i get to know several thing!! This nice doctor called Josie taught me how to make an omelette and i tasted ham for the first time! That is just how limited my life experiences are, lol. Oh and they want me to say that she's a 'mental health worker' not a doctor, but its all real confusing?? Like they have the staff that look after you and then the only ones we're supposed to call doctors are the ones who actually have the authority to prescribe pills and diagnosies. But like if youre in a hospital you'd call them all doctors, not just the actual surgeon? Or i guess theyre kinda like nursing home staff?? But they cant be support workers cos support workers are specific government assigned inspector type guys like Richard who only meet with you once a week.and i have to remember to not call him a social worker either cos social workers only work with family and custody related stuff. I dunno?? Basically the medical industry has a lot of names that dont really describe what the actual thing is, lol. Anyway the ham omelette was great and now im gonna try and remember so i can try and make it myself next time! HAM ACCOMPLISHED

Also i played bingo with a few other patients and it was fun but funny that i lost 6 times in a row when there were only 3 of us. I got a consolation prize of a pack of neon highlighter pens so hell yeah!!

I'm getting booked in to try some additional classes starting next week on monday and tuesday morning. The computer programming one was sadly unavailable, but i managed tp snag a place in "confidence building group therapy" and "basic how to use power tools". I wasnt really all that interested in that one but i thought it would be a useful skill even if its less fun. And maybe you get to actyally make something to take home at the end? A lil shelf to help organize this awkward lil room better, maybe?

And an unexpected bonus of being semi-hospitalized is that i get a free bus pass! And cos im here cos of my social anxiety theyre gonna help me get outside more and actually use this thing to the fullest! The first thing we did was the trip to actually get the bus pass itself. It was like "bus, take my money to take me to the place where i can never give you money again!" XD Ive been really stupidly nervous about going on tne bus in my old neighbourhood cos MAN it was really isolated there and everything just amplified my mental illness. An almost two hour bus ride to get to ANY SHOPS AT ALL, with only one bus for the whole town so it was always crowded and full of screaming kids and gossipy everyones. Social anxiety: maximum level proud mode!

So yeah i feel BIG ACCONPLISHED! I was able to take this bus for the first time with a doctor coming with me. Power Grandpa The Strong. His actual name is Paul and he has awesome sleeve tattoos of like anchors and dragons and sports teams and stuff! And he likes thrift stores and wearing silly hats too! Its like he's powerful enough to wrestle away everyone's anxieties! I was able to be a bit reckless too and i went out wearing my fave shirt thats like trans pride coloured plaid. A POWERFUL SHIRT IS REQUIRED FOR THIS QUEST! so we went to the office to register this bus pass and i panicked a bit cos apparantky we brought the wrong form and i wrote my name in the wrong box and then my passport photo looked terrible and aaa! But it all worked out and i was kinda freaking out for nothing. And he took me for a lil tour of the place and showed me this cool shop that does spray paint tye dye t shirts with spiderman on them?? Why does this incredibly specific shop exist and how have i never heard of it before?? There was also a new harry potter shop next to the disney shop, and the old used book store i used to visit as a kid was still there, complete with rickety spiral staircase and ominous basement trap door. I'm still not brave enough to go down there, but apparantly its just the history books section so meh. Then we actually went to a fancy coffee shop and i had this brain freeze mango ice frappucchino thing! Im trying all the new foods!!

And i was TOO HIGH ON DECADENCE and made a RECKLESS CHOICE! i blame power gramp's amazing tattoos, they were totally whispering to me that i shoukd screw the rules and ride off into the sunset on a metaphorical harley davidsen of mental health

So i was like Hey Paul I Am Totally Fine Getting Home On My Own, and it was like i was floating off in the distance somewhere begging my body to not speaketh these words. But it ended up working out okay! The excitement of it all and the sense of accomplishmebt from getting there all okay allowed me to mostly not freak out as i spent the day in town and looked at some shops and stuff. Basic Living Skills: Completed! I chilled out in the library (tho i dont have a card yet, alas!) and visited like five comic and anime stores, and got lost but found a Pizza Hut and that was SO NOSTALGIC FOR MY CHILDHOOD and it didnt taste quite as good as i remembered but the waiter guy was super nice and had a similar shirt and it was All Good! Oh and i gave all my money to a homeless person and that's why i'm broke now. And i bought a plastic slug! I just saw it from across the room and was like OH NO I AM BEING MAGNETISED TOWARDS IT OH NO IT HAS ALREADY BEEN BOUGHT. I need to think of a name for this new friend!!

So yeh i got home okay and i felt really acconplished and that was the furthest trip away that i've taken in ages! Man my mental illness makes me feel pathetic, but it also brings ridiculously big joys from the smallest of silly acconplishys!

Oh and thank you so much to the people who sent me emails! It really helped so much to keep me from giving up during the first few days before i made a bit of progress and felt like i could really do this, yknow? Especially big thanks tp the friend who sent me that mysterious super happy song that they found on a mystery disc in a german market?? Im still not sure whether its in greek or hasidic jewish but it sounds AMAZING and i hope someday i can figure out the band so i can hear their other singles!

Ok this is bunni out! BIG HUGS FOR THE EVERYONE AAAA

[theironleaf]

Someone once sent me an ask meme for couples and asked me to fill it out for my OTP. I just found it again and reposted it, cause I can’t reblog!

Okay, this kinda is a mix between my modern!AU and Azeroth, but bear with me.

Disagreements:

Who is more likely to raise their voice? Zaphaleth. He is small and angry. Who threatens to leave but never actually does? No one, they’re way too mature for that and Zaphaleth would probably have a anxiety attack if leaving was mentioned. Been left alone a little too often. They’ll calm down and just talk it out. Who actually keeps their word and leaves? - Who trashes the house? Zaf sometimes gets a little too angry and breaks something, but then he usually calms down again. Do either of them get physical? Holy fuck, no!!! Mendoriel hit Zaphaleth ONE TIME back when they were friends and he has regretted it ever since. Zaf also already has a history of being abused before, so…no!!!! just no. How often do they argue/disagree? Rarely, really. Both of them are pretty chill and Mendoriel rather gives up before starting an argument. Who is the first to apologise? Mostly Zaphaleth, cause he known he is the one that is less  sensitive with things and mostly the one who wants to be right so desperately. He’s a little know-it-all :)

Sex:

Who is on top? Mendoriel Who is on the bottom? Zaphaleth (it’s always like this) Who has the strangest desires? Zaphaleth usually comes up with the stranger things. Any kinks? They’re not really kinky what it comes to sex, but sometimes BDSM stuff comes into it, but only soft bondage. Who’s dominant in bed? Mendoriel for most of the times. He’s dominant, but really, really affectionate. Is head ever in the equation? Always. If so, who is better at performing it? Zaf, but that’s no surprise. Sucks dick like a champion. XD Ever had sex in public? Nah, they really prefer privacy and their own beds. Who moans the most? Both of them moan a lot, depending on what is going on. But I’ll go with Zaphaleth. Who leaves the most marks? Zaphaleth, Mendoriel’s arms, shoulders, chest, tummy and hips are full of love bites and sometimes even bite marks. XD Who screams the loudest? Zaf, also. :D Who is the more experienced of the two? Zaf, by far. Mendoriel was a virgin before him, despite being ~ 1800 years old already when they first did it. Do they ‘fuck’ or ‘make love’? Make love, definitely. Rough or soft? Soft. :) How long do they usually last? Quite long, but I don’t wanna say something unrealistic :D I’m not experienced enough. Is protection used? Nope. Does it ever get boring? Sometimes, yes, but Zaf usually knows how to spice it up again. Where is the strangest place they’d have sex? In the stables. But they reaaally prefer beds.

Family:

Do your muses plan on having children/or have children? They already raised Zaf’s daughter Keona together. But maybe in the future when Zaf’s illness gets better, they will adopt another child. Zaf is not too fond of children. If so, how many children do your muses want/have? - Who is the favorite parent? Keona loves them both to death really, but she runs to Zaf all the time cause he is very casual about things. Who is the authoritative parent? Mendoriel, probably cause his dad was kinda authorative too. (shit, I fucked up the format)

Who is more likely to allow the children to have a day off school? Zaf, but only if Keo does not feel good physically/mentally. Education is important guys! Who lets the children indulge in sweets and junk food when the other isn’t around? Both of them really don’t mind some junk food and sweets as long as it does not happen too often. Who turns up to extra curricular activities to support their children? Both of them! Zaf does his best at parenting and for Mendoriel of course does too, both know the importance of it. Who goes to parent teacher interviews? Both! Who changes the diapers? They switch, but Mendoriel had to do it most of the time, since Zaf was pretty miserable when Keona was a baby. (shit, I did it again!)

Who gets up in the middle of the night to feed the baby? Zaf, he was awake anyways. Fucking insomnia and nightmares. Who spends the most time with the children? Mendoriel spent a lot of time with Keo, Zaphaleth a little less cause he still needed lots of rest. Who packs their lunch boxes? Mendoriel. Who gives their children ‘the talk’? Zaphaleth, he does not give a damn and does never beat around the bush. Who cleans up after the kids? Mendoriel, usually. He’s a little tidier than Zaf, but just a little. Who worries the most? Mendoriel, Zaphaleth knows his kids are going to be fucking badass. Who are the children more likely to learn their first swear word from? Zaphaleth, he swears all the fucking time and does not even notice.

Affection:

Who likes to cuddle? Boooth! :D But Mendoriel is really really cuddly and just casually seeks it out ALL the time. Who is the little spoon? Zaf Who gets naughty in the most inappropriate of places? …Zaf. Who struggles to keep their hands to themself? Both of them, really. XD But Mendoriel has the better self control. How long can they cuddle until one becomes uncomfortable? Like forever. Who gives the most kisses? Mendoriel…HE CAN’T STOP What is their favourite non-sexual activity? Probably going out together, enjoying nature, culture and maybe take a long walk. Where is their favourite place to cuddle? Couch and bed. Who is more likely to playfully grope the other? Mendo touches Zafs butt a lot when no one is looking. How often do they get time to themselves? Sometimes. Mendoriel is usually busy all day training the troops of his father and Zaf does some engineering work or theorizing in the meantime. They have the evenings and the days where Mendoriel has the day off.

Sleeping:

Who snores? None of them, Zaf sometimes makes funny noises tho. If both do, who snores the loudest? - Do they share a bed or sleep separately? Share a bed. Still have seperate rooms in the manor tho, but they spent most time in Mendoriels. If they sleep together, do they cozy up together or lay far apart? They start by cozying up, Mendoriel does usually not move at all while Zaphaleth does fucking gymnastics in his sleep. Who talks in their sleep? Zaf babbles a lot. What do they wear to bed? Different at times. Are either of your muses insomniacs? Jesus, yes, Zaphaleth is Can sleeping pills be found by the bedside? Yeah, alongside a whole fucking bunch of Meds Zaf has to take …BUT MOST OF THE TIMES HE WON’T…does not like meds, at least not the psychotropic ones. Do they wrap their limbs around each other or just lay side by side? Mendoriel just lays there like dead while Zaf just throws his leg over him or just lays on top of him. So yeah. Zaf does a lot of things in his sleep. Who wakes up with bed hair? Zaf always has perfect hair, as we know it. …not really, he has really funky bed hair going on. Mendo’s stays fairly decent. Who wakes up first? Zaphaleth Who prepares breakfast in bed for the other? Mendoriel, as Zaf sometimes just won’t leave bed at all. What is their favourite sleeping position? Mendoriel really like spooning Zaf when he curls up and Zaf enjoys having his back protected by the warrior. Who hogs the sheets? Zaf. Do they set an alarm each night? Not really.

Can a television be found in their bedroom? Nope.

Who has nightmares? Zaphaleth almost certainly has some nightmares if he forgets to take his meds. That’s why he does sometimes refuse to go to bed if he is actually tired for once or just wakes up in the middle of the night screaming. His sleep is the worst. Who has ridiculous dreams? Mendoriel. Who sprawls out and takes up most of the bed? Zaphaleth? Mendoriel really does not move, not even an inch so he mostly just climbs onto his partner. Who makes the bed?  No one. It’s a mess. What time is bed time? Midnight at the latest! Mendo needs lots and lots of sleep. Any routines/rituals before bed? - Who’s the grumpiest when they wake up? Zaphaleth. Needs coffee.

Work:

Who is the busiest? Zaf. Who rakes in the highest income?Also Zaf. Are any of your muses unemployed? - Who takes the most sick days? Zaf. Who is more likely to turn up late to work? Zaf has his own schedule and the troops need to wait for Mendoriel. Who sucks up to their boss? - What are their jobs? Zaf is an self-employed engineer and scientist and Mendoriel is the general of his fathers army. (Modern!AU: Zaf is the CEO of his own corporation Ironleaf Industries, they work in the biomedical research and medical field and produce medical equipment, and Mendoriel is an emergency room/casualty department doctor) Who stresses the most? Zaf. Please chill. Do your muses enjoy or despise their careers/occupations? They both love it. Are your muses financially stable? Yep! Very much so.

Home: (if both lived in a home together with none other!)

Who does the washing? Mendoriel Who takes out the trash? Mendoriel Who does the ironing? Zaphaleth Who does the cooking? Zaphaleth Who is more likely to burn the house down just trying? …none, really. Who is messier? Zaphaleth Who leaves the toilet roll empty? No one would dare to do so. But I’ll go with Mendoriel. Who leaves their dirty clothes on the floor? Mendoriel Who forgets to flush the toilet? Yuck. No one. Who is the prankster around the house? Zaphaleth. But it’s only minor pranks like putting googly eyes on the fotos of Mendoriels family. Who loses the car keys when it comes time to go somewhere? Zaphaleth! Who mows the lawn? They switch. Who answers the telephone? Zaphaleth. Who does the vacuuming? The vacuuming robot Zaf built. Who does the groceries? Both of them. Who takes the longest to shower? Mendoriel. Who spends the most time in the bathroom? Zaphaleth

Miscellaneous:

Is money a problem? Nope. How many cars do they own? They probably would own two. Do they own their home or do they rent? Their own home. Do they live near the coast or deep in the countryside? Near the coast. Do they live in the city or in the country? Would probably live in the country, city isn’t unlikely either. Do they enjoy their surroundings? Yeah, very much so. What’s their song? Skillet - Comatose What do they do when they’re away from each other? Where did they first meet? Auberdine, before the demons wrecked it. How did they first meet? Mendoriel treated Zaphaleth as he was down with a very serious illness. Who spends the most money when out shopping? Zaphaleth Who’s more likely to flash their assets? Zaphaleth also. Who finds it amusing when the other trips over? Both of them laugh their asses of. Any mental issues? Zaphaleth suffers from C-PTSD, depression and probably some more shit, Mendoriel has depressive tendencies. Who’s terrified of bugs? Mendoriel. Who kills the spiders around the house? Zaphaleth, as Mendoriel is terribly afraid of spiders. Their favourite place? Bed. Always bed. Who pays the bills? Zaphaleth probably would. In azeroth, they live in Shadowdancer manor, so Sephestus sustains them. Do they have any fears for their future? Mendoriel and Zaphaleth both really worry about Zafs health and state of mind. Who’s more likely to surprise the other with a fancy dinner? Zaphaleth loves taking Mendoriel out. Who uses up all of the hot water? No one, Zaphaleth takes a short shower at first and then Mendoriel just uses up the rest in his long shower. Who’s the tallest? Mendoriel is the taller one with 7′7″ (230cm) and Zaf’s much shorter with just 6′7″ (200cm) Who’s more likely to just randomly hop into the shower with the other? Zaphaleth, but Mendoriel does it too. Who wanders around in their underwear? Zaphaleth. Who sings the loudest when singing along to the radio? Mendoriel, Zaphaleth hates singing so much. What do they tease each other about? Being clumsy, stupid verbal errors, funky pronunciations (you know, when your mouth just gives up on you), scientific inaccuracies and their little, but adorable flaws. Who is more likely to cringe at the other’s fashion sense at times? Zaphaleth. Mendoriel really does not take clothing as seriously as he does. Do they have mutual friends? Mendoriels whole family and their friends. :D Who crushed first? Zaphaleth Any alcohol or substance related problems? Zaphaleth sometimes goes a little haywire with his meds when he’s feeling very bad. Mendoriel has to look after him so he doesn’t does all kinds of pills together and takes them at once. Who is more likely to stumble home, drunk, at 3am? Zaf would, but Mendoriel does not allow him to go out alone since he does a lot of stuff he is not supposed to do and gets in danger sometimes. The engineer probably would end up in jail because he was drunk as fuck. Also Zaf has had an alcohol abuse problem and they both do not want him to relapse. Who swears the most? Zaphaleth, so much. SOOOO MUCH.