#so many of them are good people who are just stuck in an echo chamber and weren't given the choice to think

[iwanttobepersephone]

Sometimes I see people saying stupid things and I haven't physically fight the urge to say "when's the last time you talked to your family"

[shadowmaat]

Muting & Blocking are evil, now

It used to be that muting and blocking were considered the polite way to avoid people and content you didn't want to see. Common wisdom was that you could block (or mute) anyone for any reason, no matter how minor/petty.

Then came the accusations about "echo chambers" and how folks were using these very handy features in order to silence dissenting opinions so they could live in their own little bubbles of unreality.

This applied equally to Liberals who were refusing to listen to "vaccines cause autism" rhetoric and to Conservatives who refused to listen to scientists. And many many other variations of that kind of thing. SO many variations.

The point is that people tried to turn mute/block from a tool into a weapon. If you refused to listen to a dissenting opinion, you were a Bad Person. And probably delusional.

Lately the rage against mute/block seems to be getting even worse. I've heard folks say that muting someone for spamming "help me" posts from others is an attempt to silence those voices and shows that the muter is a cruel, heartless person who doesn't care about other people. As opposed to, y'know, the person only having so much money to give and being overwhelmed by how many more people she couldn't help.

I also saw a rather wild case on bluesky where someone accused an OP of "censorship" for blocking him (he was very anti-mask) because, regardless of her stance on things, he had a right to use her mentions as a soapbox for his beliefs and she was oppressing him. (on bluesky when an OP blocks someone all their replies show up as blocked within the thread).

Whatever happened to muting/blocking someone for any damn reason you want? What happened to being able to curate your own experience and/or protecting yourself from stressful content? The growing issue of "everyone assumes the worst possible thing" fits in here, too, and it gets used as an excuse to be angry and lash out.

How do you live your life being angry at everything all the time? It must be exhausting. Which probably just makes you angrier.

Anyway, I'm gonna keep muting and blocking people whenever I want. I'm not gonna get bent out of shape when people do it to me. And frankly, I have enough trouble managing my own life without trying to micromanage the lives of others. LOL!

Remember to focus on the good things once in a while so you don't get stuck in a toxic quagmire of "everything and everyone is awful, all of the time."

Anyway, enjoy this gif of a small, stripey kitten snoozing hard in someone's hand, surrounded by a big puffy blanket. There are still good things in the world, and the ability to tune out once in a while is one of them.

[fite-club]

The piss poor definitions of everything in the ace community lead to basically 90% of the world being able to identify as asexual. Asexuality is defined by deviance from the norm, but no one fucking knows what the norm is. If you have less sexual attraction than an 'allo' person, you're grey sexual. How much sexual attraction does an allo person have? Uhh no one knows. It's literally unquantifiable. There's no actual definition for 'allosexual' other than 'normal' or 'average' but then those words are never defined. So you just have to guess what the norm is based on the 3 people you're close enough with to talk about this philosophical stuff about attraction and hypersexualized media where everyone is fucking everyone because it makes for a good sitcom. It's genuinely impossible and that's why so many in the ace community are so confused about where they fall and so insecure about their identity because they're all just guessing.

And god, the label hopping. People find out they actually experience sexual attraction and the ace community does their best to keep them from going away, shoving microlabel after microlabel at them so they never think that maybe they're a dreaded allosexual after all.

one more thing. The ace community is so focused on separating itself from the rest of the world that they make everything more difficult for themselves. They do stuff to deliberately stand out, make awkward jokes about being too enlightened for sex (..while having regular sex half the time), make up weird relationship constructs and get upset that no one wants to be in them. They psych themselves out over feeling attraction and start acting extremely weird because tHatS wHaT tHe aLlOs dO. Plus the extremely unattractive ways they describe why they have sex and then they get upset that no one wants to date them because they say they see their partner as a flesh sex toy. Girl just be normal. Describe yourself as a low libido person and youll be fine i prommy.

that's what i meant by the ace community imploding by being too inclusive, they lost the plot as soon as the split attraction model entered the picture. the experiences of someone who is an "asexual" as in "aroace" as in "someone who wants platonic partnership only" are unique and are shared amongst other people of the same identity. when you open that up, though, suddenly there aren't those shared experiences, and those labels don't convey the same thing. there's no good reason why someone who wants sex would label themselves as asexual, just like there's no good reason why someone who wants sex with someone of the same gender would label themselves as straight. that kind of prescriptive "gatekeeping" is seen as evil by inclusionists but to exclusionists it's just basic reality. if a straight couple identifies as "demisexual", what makes their experiences different from a straight allosexual couple? the fact that neither of them were sexually attracted to each other at first really does not affect the material reality of their lives, to everyone else on earth they are a straight couple that has sex. but if you acknowledge that, you have to acknowledge that those people have privilege and are not lgbt, which ace inclusionists stubbornly refuse to do.

and yeah the worst part is all the teens who get stuck in an echo chamber of "aspec" people, their perception of how others experience attraction and relationships get so warped. like your classmates being awkward after you tell them "i have no interest in sex" isn't because they think you're messed up for being ace, it's because they didn't ask and most likely do not care. you may struggle with your own insecurities about being lonely but you can't just project them as if the norm is that being single is weird

[shrimpmandan]

I honestly can’t tell if the modern definition of transmedicalism (or just the community around it) has changed, or if MY own opinions have changed. It’s a surreal experience seeing people talk about transmedicalism like from the 2016-2018 era, but then in my own groups I don’t see any of that associated behavior hardly at all (or the people who do show that behavior are treated as clowns).

I already put a biiiig thing clarifying my stances in my Carrd, but I figured I’d also plop it here since I don’t want anyone to assume what I believe in just because they see the funny buzzword discourse label.

So:

- You DON'T need to medically transition to be trans. Or “do” anything to be trans. There’s no real barrier for entry; it’s just whatever helps you to feel more comfortable with yourself. The only “barrier” is the presence of dysphoria, which is what that discomfort is-- feeling like something is missing, feeling like you’d be happier as the opposite sex, wanting to be treated as another gender. That’s all dysphoria!

- People who genuinely fake being trans are a minority of a minority, and nothing good will come out of restricting trans healthcare further.

- I'm antsy about research (especially neurological research) into the brains of nonbinary people and may reblog things both in support and against the identity, but I respect them regardless. Consider me to generally lean pro.

- The psychological community does not understand trans people and conflates the concept of gender nonconformity with being trans, under the label of “gender expansive”. I (and many others) find this conflation to be inaccurate and offensive, and it also bleeds into public understandings of what a trans person is.

- MOGAI kids and nonbinary people are not responsible for our oppression and to say so is fucking stupid. My reasons for being anti-MOGAI have more to do with the creator and the fact that I don't view gender as being solely a social construct.

- Dysphoria does not mean suffering, nor does it mean hating your body. Go here if you wanna see the diagnostic criteria for gender dysphoria.

- TransID is ableist and racist. I shouldn't have to explain why.

It’s like being stuck between a rock and a hard place. By all means I don’t agree with the sentiment of “you don’t need dysphoria, gender isn’t real, go nuts”, because it feels like it stems from misinformation about what gender dysphoria means and also disregards the biological components of gender that DO exist. But I also can’t fucking stand the flop/cringe crowd that scrutinizes everything a trans person says. I’ve definitely been on the receiving end of “oh you have DYSMORPHIA, not DYSPHORIA” before and it was extremely irritating, not to mention a blatant misunderstanding of what body dysmorphia is. It also shoves “actual trans people” back into the closet because imposter syndrome is a bitch and while insisting people to know absolutely 100% for certain that they’re trans is advice given out of a good place, it ultimately ends up not being helpful for those who have fluctuating dysphoria, imposter syndrome, OCD, or any amount of other conditions that can make them go back and forth on it a lot.

I wish there was more of a middle ground between the two extremes instead of it feeling like you just have to dig around for the transmeds who aren’t exceedingly insecure and/or malignant. And you STILL get kicked out of most trans communities anyways because they’ve (understandably) built their walls up so high that it goes really far in the direction of accommodating one type of trans person, while utterly alienating another, which is how we get transmed spaces (and echo chambers) to begin with. 

I think my opinions will always lean transmed because I’m someone who puts a lot of stock into psychology and neuroscience-- those are my special interests, moreso the former than the latter. I feel like psychologists and doctors in general have failed trans people on a lot of fronts, but is that the fault of kids with atypical identities? No, not at all, for as much as I find the whole “meowgender” business to be dumb. But also going out and starting debates or god forbid harassing random teenagers and young adults because you think you’re entitled to know every little thing about their identity is JUST as dumb, not to mention pathetic. The transmeds who don’t think that way are the ones I agree with. The ones that do are just as bad as the ‘tucutes’ they criticize, and both contribute to dividing the trans community further. And yes, BOTH. This whole discourse was started by a tucute cis girl pretending to be a trans girl, lest we forget. Transmeds aren’t evil and neither are tucutes. Tumblr discourse just makes an ass out of everyone.

[strangeswift]

I actually think it is important to be be 'controversial' sometimes because it clears your mind. I am speaking from personal experience. After reading same things over and over again in the tag and seeing the same takes, it blurs your mind and it is like you join a caddle. Then you kinda need to step back and think more clearly and reading other takes and readings help you to clear your mind. I've changed my mind on many things because of that and I believe I have a better understanding in things now than before. Like. I am not gonna get blindsided by what happens next on the show because I do not agree with most popular byler takes (that are reaches most of the time). I still read those things but I am open to different or 'controversial' takes and ideas that are not widely accepted by the bylers in the tag.

Hi anon!!!! Oop I went on a rant so hold on lemme put a read more. Warning I talk about byler doubt (just the concept of having doubts nothing specific about it) towards the end.

Okay anon I agree and this makes me feel good about posting opinions that go against the grain. So thank you for saying this, because I'll be real even though I am confident in my takes, sometimes voicing them comes with a level of anxiety. Here's the thing. The tag likes to act like there are certain things we know for sure are going to happen in S5 (byler endgame being the biggest thing obviously, but there are lots of other more specific things, byler related and not) and the truth is: We Don't Know Anything For Sure!! And I think it's wise to be prepared for the possibility that things work out differently than we are expecting. And this goes for fandom discourse as well not just theories like I think the tag is a bit of an echo chamber, like you said. It truly is easy to get sucked it. I've always been extremely skeptical, that's just how I am, and sometimes I forget that just.. not everyone is as skeptical as I am. Don't get me wrong, I have been sucked in before too. There have been instances where I held an opinion, then when I examined it further I realized it was just rooted in the fact that everyone else held that opinion, and I didn't actually agree with it. But generally I take anything and everything with several grains of salt, which is why like you said it's probably good for me to talk about my opinions when they differ from the norm, because it offers an alternative line of thinking. I do keep my mouth shut about most things because I like to be liked, but yk... I also. hmm do I wanna talk about this.. eh fuck it. I think the biggest thing that makes me "controversial" to some people, other than disagreeing with widely accepted theories, is that I have on several occasions voiced my Byler Doubt™️. And honestly there's a reason why I do sometimes talk about it. I realize that there's no point in dwelling on the possibility of byler not happening, it's depressing. And I would never put doubt in the tag or anything like that. But here's my thing. When I was a smaller blog and didn't have the platform I do now, NONE of the big blogs ever EVER expressed any level of doubt. The narrative was "having doubt is bad, endgame is obvious, if you don't find it obvious you are media illiterate, stuck in heteronormativity, or just plain stupid." And I vehemently disagree with that. Frankly? I find 100% confidence to be a little bit unrealistic, but I would never ever think someone is any less intelligent for having 100% confidence! But I digress. My point is, I suspect there are many people, like me, who have doubts and who feel very isolated. Having doubt is literally taboo, which is insane to me. It's cult vibes is what it is. Anyway. Now that I have a big enough platform that I more or less can kind of say what I want and not get blacklisted, I almost feel a responsibility to occasionally be like hey by the way, I have my doubts! Just so people know. Because it doesn't make you stupid. It makes you realistic. Okay rant over sorry <3

[cryptid-artha]

Unfortunately, being so liberal with the block button is actually part of what is wrong with the internet nowadays. It causes everything to narrow so much, folks are stuck in a shrinking echo chamber with fewer and fewer people there who can pull them out of it. And because there's so many things on the internet, everybody sees things differently and it's caused a very strong "Us or Them" mentality that's damaged every internet space it's touched.

Yes - block people who are harmful to you. Block people who harass you, but don't block over a little disagreement or difference in opinion or difference in things you like. We are all human. We are each different people with different opinions and views on the world ... And that's good! Blocking everybody you don't agree with becomes dangerous, FAST! Not only does it isolate those people you disagree with, but it isolates you, too.

Instead, I suggest using Tumblr's filter system. Filter out tags you don't want to see or tags that make you uncomfortable, instead of just completely blocking someone you disagree with.

If they are actually argumentative and causing arguments for the sake of arguments or their behavior is actually harmful, that's a different story. By all means, block them in that case! But isolating yourself and others because of different opinions is extremely dangerous and damaging.

“wow you blocked me just cuz i disagreed with you???”

yes. yes, exactly. this is a social media site. i come here to look at pictures of birds and shitpost with my friends. this is not a town hall meeting; i am not your elected official. i do not owe you my energy, my space, or my time. you and i are strangers that use the same website. i can block you for literally any reason and that’s okay. take a deep breath. block me too. you’ll feel better.

[epickiya722]

hullo, hullo! Your posts sometimes pop up on my dash, and since MHA has ended, I've decided to share my opinions (as an anon unfortunately)

I've seen a stark difference in the fandom across platforms. r/bokunoheroacademia on Reddit is one of the more sane ones (maybe due to the mods); and I personally like going there. They respect other shippers and 'discuss', not 'argue'.

Tumblr is more carefree- in form of fanart and media. But then there are some... y'know, aggressive, critical folks who very much cannot tolerate another POV.

Let's not go to X... I barely lurk there for reasons. (Feel bad for Horikoshi tho, poor man's stuck in that echo chamber).

That's it for now! I might return to express my thoughts on the ending, but I'd like to hear your opinions on fandoms across platforms!

Good day! :)

~🍩

It's okay if you choose to be on Anon! I have it on for a reason. I know some people are shy and just want to be private.

I apologize beforehand if any of my posts annoy you, sometimes I do feel like I'm a little annoying. I just have thoughts and feelings and sometimes have to express them. And only hope to encourage those to do the same.

I think it's... I don't the exact word I want to use here, but it's something how different the fandom will act depending on the platform.

I really don't have an opinion on the fandom on Reddit since I haven't been there. But I haven't heard anything like remotely bad about people there and yeah, it could be the mods.

Twitter... oh, X... yeah... I don't have an account there but I have seen screenshots, posts, so much from there that I can see why some people say it's a cesspool there. I just... wow... but, I will say, I don't think all of that fandom there is bad. I feel like the loud ones just happen to be the terrible ones.

Now Tumblr, it's like a hit or miss type situation because I have seen posts that give me the energy of someone from X. I have blocked and unfollowed so many within the past... year or two.

Some people I just feel do want to rile someone up and so they can turn around and act all innocent for attention. It annoys me that the same "I can't have my opinion" crowd, some of them also will turn around and attack people for their opinions. I have had people to do that to me and all I can do is feel sorry for them. Like, you felt the need to be aggressive to me because I don't share the same feelings as you? That's wild.

Like, if I disagree with someone, I will express it... BY WRITING MY OWN POST. I don't care to reblog someone's post and call them an idiot.

I don't think people are genuinely idiots... I think they just want to say something just to cause chaos.

Collectively, I think what is good about having somewhere to post is to have somewhere to post and connect with those who do feel the same as you or just even want to see different views. And yes, I mean this for even the people I don't particularly like. Sometimes you need to let out what you feel.

[nsheetee]

One Foot in the Golden Life

Pairing: rich kid!renjun x caddie!reader Genre: rich kid AU, university au, romance, slight angst, mature content Length: 9.7k Summary: this is the story of a boy who is constantly pushed down by his father, a girl who just wants to not live paycheck to paycheck, and how they met on a golf course.  Warnings/Details: includes mentions of other NCT members, female reader, swearing, inaccurate depiction of golf, acts of sexual harassment towards the reader, mature content (unprotected sex, coming inside, oral [female receiving])

a/n: a big thank you to @insomni-writing​ for beta reading this ♡ also, if you are a minor, please beware that there is mature content in this fic!

You thought it would be the perfect opportunity to work at the most well-known country club in the state, but really the only thing your job brought you was perpetual cold to your hands and feet, and entangled your simple life with one of the youngest and richest bachelors at your university.

The only place on top of Mt. Carla is the Augusta Country Club, and it is a sight to see by the regular people who gaze up at it from the city below, like mortals looking up into the Gods’ chamber. The first time you went up the mountain for your job interview at the club, you got lost and were almost late. Thankfully, you didn’t crash your car on the winding roads, and got the job as well.

The Augusta Country Club is equipped with the largest and most expensive golf course in the region, but also has Michilin approved restaurants and the finest saunas and gym equipment any CEO could ask for. Those are usually the type of people that have club memberships: CEO’s, congress men and women, top-notch lawyers, and maybe the odd business owner that made it big enough to afford the price tag.

When you took up the job as a caddie, you had an idea of what you were getting yourself into. You’ve only been working for a month, but there are already a few regular golf players that prefer you as their caddie, which in your book is a success considering the type of high profile people that come to relax here.

However, today is different.

You can sense it when Kara and Mina, your coworkers who have been working here for a year longer than you, walk towards you and your friend, Lia, before your shift today. Mina has a small stack of info cards in her hands and they both hold smug smiles on their faces. The info cards have everything a caddie needs to know about who they’ll be working for that shift, and by the looks of it, today’s game will have a good match up.

“I’m going to be Mr. Huang’s son’s caddie. Don’t even fight me on this, you know I’ll win.” Kara states boldly as the two girls stop in front of you, snatching an info card out of Mina’s hand when she holds them up like she’s playing a card game, flashing the photos and names on the cards at you.

“I call dibs on Mr. Lee’s son.” Mina hums, not even bothering to keep up the act that they just want to be good caddies. “You two can have the old men.” She smiles tightly, shoving the other two info cards into Lia’s grasp and turning on her heel to walk away with Kara.

Considering you don’t even know what they’re talking about, you have no right to be mad at them. There is more confusion clouding your mind than anger at their rudeness. However, Lia does not share the same sentiment.

“I’ll shove these info cards up their-” Lia fumes, her volume rising as the sentence went on, and you quickly pulled her out of ear shot, around a corner by the bathrooms. “-stuck up two faced asses!”

“Lia…” You mutter, her wording making you shake your head at how unstable her temper is, “They’ve been working here for a lot longer than we have, just let them have those clients. Either way, what’s it to you?”

“What’s it to me? ___, they’re talking about Lee Jeno and Huang Renjun. I know I told you about them before.” Lia states like she expects you to have those two names tattooed on the front lobe of your brain already.

“I think I remember them…. They go to our University, right?” You try to regurgitate your friend’s rambles from months ago out of your head.

“Yeah, business department.” She sighs dreamily, as if the business department is the sexiest thing on campus. “This might be our only chance to shoot our shot.” You can’t help but grimace a bit.

“It can be your chance to shoot your shot. Leave me out of this.” You randomly grab an info card out of Lia’s hands, turning it around to see Mr. Huang Lijun’s photo staring back at you. You send Lia one last look, walking around her to go change in the dressing rooms.

“Aw, you’re no fun.” You hear her whine, her footsteps echo through the hallway as she comes up behind you. She almost knocks you into the wall from how forcefully she grabs onto your arm and swings it back and forth like you’re two little kids on your way to the playground.

“Maybe we can shoot our shot at the old men?” You and Lia stop walking, turning to face each other for a moment of silence. You blink at each other as if you’re both considering it, before erupting into laughter at the ridiculous thought and continue walking down the hallway.

You and Lia constantly joke around about finding rich sugar daddies at work to pay for your college tuition, but both of you know you’ll never actually commit to the idea fully. Neither of you will admit it, but you both know you don’t have the guts to do something like that.

By the time you, Lia, and your other coworkers change into uniform and gather your supplies for the Lee vs. Huang game, it’s already 10am. The air is crisp and cool, the signs of fall creep along your skin and taint the deep green trees in light oranges and yellows.

Despite the chill, you and your coworkers still wear skirts, long sleeve v-necks, and puffy vests; the only thing keeping your feet warm is a pair of short white socks and tennis shoes. You don’t mind the chill knowing that once the game starts you’ll be moving around enough to get warm. You stop thinking about your cold toes as soon as the door of the country club opens and the Lees and Huangs walk out.

The first time you lay eyes on Huang Renjun, you think your heart might stop.

You know it’s him because he walks close to his father as they make their way to where you’re standing by the golf carts. He has obviously dyed blonde color, his dark roots proof of that; it’s neatly gelled back in an effortless way with the light wind blowing a few of the locks gently as if an angel is personally moving them for him. His white jacket and black pants are slim and look like they cost more than all of your college textbooks this semester. He walks with his head high, his pretty, pink lips set in a straight line, and his almond eyes gentle.

Okay, so... maybe you understand the hype now.

“Good evening, ladies.” Mr. Lee announces, looking at you and your coworkers. You all politely introduce yourself and state who you’ll be caddying for.

Huang Lijun isn’t as tall as his son, but he looks to be more lively than Renjun, even at his age. He has a permanent smile on his lips and you can feel a friendly demeanor radiating from him when you approach.  

“Good Morning, sir. Let me take those off of your hands.” You politely grab the bag of clubs from him, feeling shy as his gaze doesn’t leave your face the entire time.

“You’re new here, right? I feel like I would remember you if I saw you before.” You’re surprised when he suddenly pinches your cheek, and he laughs at your shocked face. An unsettled feeling plants itself at the bottom of your stomach at the unwarranted touch.

“I’ve only been working here for a month, sir.”

“I think I’ll be coming around here more often, then.” He winks at you and turns to go sit in the front seat of the golf cart. You can’t help but let the feeling at the bottom of your stomach grow at how the older man looks at you. You definitely misjudged his “friendly” demeanor. Your eyes can’t help but glance at Renjun, who’s standing a few feet away from the whole interaction. He gives you a blank stare before turning and following his father.

In the past few weeks, you had gotten many lustful smiles and lewd gazes at your bare legs, but also many dollars in tips just in one morning by letting those smiles and gazes happen. The need to make ends meet justifies it all, and the cash you earn at the end of every shift only fuels this need.

The ride from the club’s main building to the first hole is short, so you quickly recompose yourself. You still have a job to do— a job you’re being paid lots of money for. You believe in your strong will to put up with whatever antics Mr. Huang pulls for the next few hours. Upon arrival at the first hole, you pull the bag of golf clubs out of the cart and follow in Mr. Huang’s quick footsteps, suddenly feeling sweaty from the exercise you’re getting by carrying these heavy clubs. When your group reaches the first hole, you set the bag down on the ground and press your hand over your face, but Mr. Huang’s voice startles you.

“Woah, there.” You jump and face him. “Those clubs cost more than my car, and unlike my car, they don’t deserve to be on the ground, darling.”

“Yes, sir. I apologize.” You smile shyly and pick up the clubs from the ground, your shoulders already straining to keep them up. ‘They weigh as much as a car,’ you huff.

This is going to be a long game.

“You kids can clean the carts today,” Mina suddenly throws a keychain at Lia’s face, she barely catches it before it hits her, “I have plans.”

“Me, too.” Kara quickly says, following after Mina as they both walk away. The game ended right at lunchtime (the Lees won) and now you and your coworkers are back at the club. It’s supposed to be everyone’s job to clean the golf carts after they’ve been used, but it looks like today it’ll just be you and Lia… Maybe.

“___, please. I’m going to be late to the cafe, my boss there is already mad at me.” Lia turns to you and begs with her hands clasped in front of her chest, eyes pleading and feet bouncing. You sigh; you’re hungry and your muscles are sore, and all you want to do is go home as quickly as you can. Still, you roll your eyes and take the golf cart keys from her, making her face crack open into a smile as she hugs you quickly.

“I’ll bring you coffee on Monday!” She screams at you as she practically runs away, leaving you with two golf carts to clean. You sluggishly begin, crawling into the cart the Huangs were sitting in when you find a small notebook laying on one of the seats. Picking it up to examine it, you find out it’s your university’s yearly planner, a book that everyone gets at the beginning of every academic year. Along the binder reads “Huang Renjun” and your eyes widen, immediately looking up to glance at the direction that Renjun walked off to a while ago.

Your legs move quickly through the corridors of the club, moving past changing rooms, saunas, and bathrooms, the planner tightly clutched in your hand. Your head is on a swivel and your lower lip is stuck between your teeth, until you hear a door open and slam shut behind you, making you turn your head to catch Renjun walking out of a changing room.

“Mr. Huang!” You call out.. Renjun freezes at the name, spinning on his heel to see you walking towards him.

“Sorry to disturb you, but you left your planner on the golf cart.” You hold it out for him, but he doesn’t take it.

“How do you know it’s a planner? Did you look through it?” You blink at him, stunned, and then glance down at the notebook. You’re surprised by the sudden questions and at the same time annoyed that Renjun accused you of snooping through his things so quickly. The image you had of him earlier, graceful, classy, and attractive, slips out of your mind as he stares down at you. However, this is the first time he’s directly talking to you, and you can’t help the spark that ignites in your belly from the roughness in his voice. It’s higher-pitched, but unpolished and jagged as he speaks with you.

“No. I go to the same University. I have the same one.” You explain. Renjun’s stare turns into shock.

“Really? Which department?”

“Fine Arts. I study Studio Art.” At first you think that you’re seeing things, but after blinking, you can guarantee that Renjun has jealousy painted on his face. It’s so sour that he looks away, trying to preoccupy his hands by fiddling with his bag. “So, are you going to take this, or…?”

“Yeah,” The bitterness drips from his tone, but you have a feeling it’s not directed at you, “Thank you for returning it.” He finally accepts it and turns to his bag, taking out his wallet. The cards inside look thick and heavy; memberships to places you’ll never step foot in and credit cards with limits you could never even imagine. Your pride tells you that you don’t need anything he could give you, so you silently turn around and walk away.

Renjun shuffles through some crisp 10’s and 20’s, but when he looks up to give you the tip, you’re already down the hallway and halfway out the door. You have golf carts to clean.

The next time you see Renjun is a week after the last game. The chilly weather remains, along with the useless uniform you have to wear, but this time around you’re not Mr. Huang’s caddie, you’re Renjun’s.

Kara walks next to you with Mr. Huang’s heavy golf clubs, her lips straight and head turned away from you to show her annoyance at how the caddie match up situation went this week. You’re sure to get an earful about this for at least the next few days, but you kind of like this revenge that fate dealt Kara. Either way, it’s not like there’s anything you can do about the match up. Renjun requested you to be his caddie this week, and you weren’t going to risk your bosses being angry with you by denying the request.

“Driver.” Renjun’s voice pulls you into the game. You pull out the correct golf club and put it into his awaiting hand, your fingertips brushing with his. “Aren’t you cold?” The words shock you, considering they’re the first words Renjun spoke to you today other than commands for golf clubs.

“I-I’m fine, Mr. Huang.” You respond promptly.

“Don’t call me that.” His tone is icy, and he quickly realizes how unnecessary it is to bite at you like that, “Just call me Renjun.” His father walks back from his shot, looking very smug. Renjun’s face is calm as he trades spots with his father and prepares for his first swing of the day, correcting his posture and loosening his limbs.

You remember the first time you saw him, how elegant and poised he looked. Your cold hands break into a sweat as your chest heats up from the quick beating of your heart. Renjun has only been icy and accusing towards you so far, yet you still feel warm while thinking about him. There has to be something wrong with you.

“Doesn’t my son look like he knows what he’s doing?” Mr. Huang asks from beside you, a small, unnerving smile on his lips.

“Yes, sir.” You reply back with your own, more innocent, smile.

“I taught him everything he knows about golf…. And women.” Mr. Huang leans into you, turning his chest to face you so that his breath is hitting your cheek. You can’t help but swallow to relieve your dry and cold throat, keeping your eyes forward as Renjun swings his club back and forth a bit in preparation.

“Yes, sir.” The only thought on your mind is to stop this man from stepping closer.

“Is that the only thing you can say?”

Renjun swings his arm back, breathing in as he keeps his eyes on the small white ball and his hopes in the green before him. Mr. Huang’s right hand is warm on your waist, but you would give anything to freeze right now.

A sharp crack ripples through the air as Renjun hits the golf ball and sends it flying into the golf course. His eyes are not where the ball lands, but instead on where his father touches you.

Renjun’s mom died when he was not even three days old.

He never got to meet her— to lay on her chest and hold her finger with his whole hand. He’ll never know what advice she would’ve given him when he got his first girlfriend, and he’ll never know how she would’ve reacted to him crashing his first car when he was 17. He only knows that his mom would’ve been there for him through all of that, unlike his father, who was not.

Renjun has had “mothers” through his life; three, to be exact. The first was when he was 5 years old, and she quickly asked for a divorce after Renjun’s dad went on a three month business trip and she didn’t hear from him the whole time. The second “mother” was a bit more mature than the first and with a lot more time on her hands. She wanted to shape 9 year old Renjun into a perfect student, which was something Renjun’s father appreciated, but still divorced her for “being too strong-headed.” Renjun only met his third mother twice when he was 13: once at the wedding and the second time at her funeral. He didn’t ask any questions, he wasn’t very interested in the first place.

These were the type of people Renjun spent his life around, but they really weren’t his mothers. The only similarity he had with those women was his father, and he treated them as poorly as he treated Renjun. That’s why when Renjun looks at you, cowering away from the very man who is his only link to family, he feels sick.

When is his dad going to stop being a fucking predator? How young does he want his next conquest to be? Will Renjun’s next mom be the same age as him? Something swirls in the pit of his stomach when he watches his father and it takes a moment for him to figure out what it is: jealousy. He’s not sure why he’s feeling jealous over someone he just met last week, but the feeling engulfs his whole chest and it burns him to his spot.

Renjun doesn’t even notice that he swung his golf club or that the golf ball went somewhere far into the green, probably an overshot. He only sees you, afraid of the man touching you but not stepping away. Why aren’t you stepping away?

“Nice job, Renjun.” His best friend, Jeno, claps a hand on his back as he steps up, hitting Renjun back into reality and forcing him to walk towards you. As Renjun approaches, his father slyly takes his hand away, and Renjun notices how you let out a relieved sigh. Giving you back his driver, Renjun strategically stands between you and his father, pretending to watch Jeno swing.

“Good job… Renjun.” You whisper, unsure about calling him by his first name so informally.

“Thank you.” Renjun sends a side glance to his father to see the displeased look on his face. “How was that, Dad?” Renjun hopes that maybe he can remind his father of why he’s here (to win against the Lees this week, not to feel up a girl 30 years younger than him) but in this moment, his father is acting like a 5 year old in the middle of a silent tantrum, not a 50 year old who runs the most successful construction company in the country.

“I’ve taught you better than that.” Renjun is sure they’re not talking about golf anymore, the authoritative tone in his father’s voice sends a lightning bolt of surprise and slight fear down Renjun’s back. He hates how he gets scared, he hates how his father can control him. The fury churns in the pit of his stomach as he accepts his father’s words with a bow of his head.

One day, Renjun swears he won’t submit anymore.

After the game ended with the Lees winning once again, you, Lia, and your other coworkers convene at the golf carts after the clients leave to change inside the club.

“You ladies know the drill.” Kara throws both sets of golf cart keys at you before walking off with Mina. You push Lia towards the entrance of the building before she even has a chance to turn around and open her mouth.

“You should get to the cafe before your boss throws another fit.” Lia turns back to face you, her jaw slightly slack and her eyes shining.

“You’re seriously the best. I love you.”

“Yeah, yeah, just give me a few extra shots in my coffee on Monday.” Lia laughs at that, grabbing your face between her two small, manicured hands and kissing you on each cheek before hopping off inside. You can’t help but be amused at her antics, turning to the golf carts in front of you to start cleaning.

“They make you clean the carts by yourself?” The voice startles you, not because you weren’t expecting it but because it’s Renjun’s. You turn your head over your shoulder, he’s standing just a few feet away still in his golfing gear from earlier.

“Uh, not usually, no. But my coworkers haven’t been happy with me lately.” You explain, fully turning to him and crossing your arms over your chest to tuck your cold hands into your sides.

“The ones who have been working here for a while?” You nod as an answer, and Renjun nods back in understanding, shoving his hands in his pants pockets. “They’ve been trying to get with me and my best friend for a while...” Renjun trails off when he sees your eyebrows raise at the comment, “... But that’s not what I came here to talk about.”

“Oh? What are you here for?” The conversation has gotten too informal for a worker and their client to be having, but you kind of like talking to Renjun in this casual setting.

“I realized that the past few times we’ve talked I’ve been such a dick.” He laughs lightly as he remembers, “I wanted to apologize for that. I wasn’t in a good mood last week and this morning, and I ended up pushing it on you.”

Renjun feels lots of emotions when it comes to you, despite only having this one proper conversation with you. He feels envy towards you for being able to study something that he desperately wants to. He feels guilt when he remembers how quickly he made you into a thief when you were only trying to return his belongings, and he feels so many other secondary and tertiary emotions in between. His head is full when he looks at you. He finally feels like he’s thinking about something, not just doing the same day to day motions in a constant cycle of ‘when will this end?’

“You’re apologizing?” You ask, stunned when he nods his head in confirmation. Sincere apologies are important to you. You believe there are not enough of them in this world anymore, and his gentle almond eyes are too wholehearted and warm for you in this cold weather. Your heart feels full looking at him, and you curse at yourself in your head for being swayed like this.

“I also have a question… You mentioned you’re majoring in Studio Art and I was wondering if, maybe, you could let me into one of the studios after a class this week? I’ve been needing a quiet place to work since my house has been busy lately.” One of the hands that was in Renjun’s pocket moves to matte down his sideburns while he glances at his shoes. “Was that too forward? Sorry, I just know that you can’t get into a studio without a passcode and you’re the only person I know who’s in Studio Art.” Renjun explains after you stare for a while, blinking at him.

“You’re an artist?” You finally ask, Renjun giving you a weak ‘yeah’ in response. A part of you wants to say no, that it’ll be weird to do something like this for him when you’ve only known him for less than 2 weeks and up until this point, you’ve only been in a worker-client relationship. However, you’re curious about what he’s like outside of this setting, especially what he’s like when his father has no possibility of appearing, since that seems to be the factor that turns his mood up or down.

“Sure. Come by studio 3 after 6pm on Wednesday and I’ll let you in, but... I heard Mr. Lee already scheduled a game for next weekend?” Renjun nods, “Then in return, you can win that game. It’s embarrassing always being on the losing team.” You smile playfully at the end to let him know you’re only joking.

“Deal.” Renjun sends a smile back of the same caliber, holding out a hand to shake with yours. If you thought you were affected by Renjun’s nice presence, his hand in yours sends you into another realm. His touch is warm from staying indoors and from keeping his hands in his pockets, and they contrast to your cold skin. He sucks in a breath through his teeth when your hands connect, turning your hand in his grip to look at your knuckles. “Are you sure you’re not cold? Your hands are freezing.”

“I’ll be okay. I just don’t have any good gloves to wear while working.” He huffs, small traces of white smoke leaves his mouth as he digs through his pockets.

“Wear these.” He replaces his hand in yours with a pair of his own gloves, “Your hands are precious, they shouldn’t be freezing.” Before Renjun can get embarrassed by his own words, he shoves his hands back into his pockets and turns on his heel, walking away, “I’ll see you on Wednesday!”

A knock on the studio doors shakes you away from staring at your painting, making you turn to look at who it is. Renjun peaks through the small window and waves when you make eye contact. You get up to open the door, almost forgetting that today is the day you agreed to let Renjun into your studio.

… Okay, that’s a lie. You definitely remembered that you’re supposed to meet Renjun, but you keep trying to convince yourself that you’re not excited about seeing him outside of that stuffy country club.

“Hey, sorry if I startled you.” Is the first thing he says when you open the door. He’s dressed in slacks, a dress shirt with a sweater over it, and a long coat over that. His nose and cheeks are slightly red from the rough wind outside and his supplies are clutched to his chest.

“Oh, you’re fine. I was just deep in thought.” Something about the studio makes both of you speak in hushed tones. No one else is here, but you feel the need to maintain the peace and quiet the room naturally holds. You and Renjun make your way to where you’re set up, he puts his things down on an easel to your left and takes off his coat, watching you from his peripheral vision.

Those uniforms they make you wear at work are just for show, Renjun knows that well, but that doesn’t stop him from appreciating you in the tight vest and little skirt. However right now, he likes your laid back look consisting of loose jeans and a layered shirt, he thinks it matches you.

“I was going to leave when you got here, but I think I’ll just finish this and head out.” You comment, aimlessly waving at your project.

“Please, stay as long as you need to. This is your studio, I don’t want to kick you out.” He laughs and licks his bottom lip. It’s breathtaking how innocent and nice his smile looks on his face. His eyes scrunch together to form laugh lines and his cheeks rise, he truly looks pretty when he smiles. You think this is the first time you’ve seen him like this.

You mumble back with a mixture of words that probably didn’t make sense and turn back to your work, leaving the room to continue with its peacefulness and quiet. However, Renjun’s presence next to you is too big to ignore. There are so many things you want to know about him and you have no excuse as to why you’re so curious.

“How about a game while we work?” You suggest.

“Sure… How about 20 questions?” It’s like he read your mind, so you smile and nod at his idea.

“You can go first.” You suggest.

“Okay, uh… Why do you work at a golf course if you’re majoring in Studio Art? Shouldn’t you be working at a, I don’t know, museum?” The question catches you off guard and Renjun notices how you stop painting, your brush and your hand floating in the air as you think, “Oh, sorry, is that too personal?”

“No, no… It’s just, normally, the first question people ask in a game of 20 questions is something like ‘what’s your favorite color’ or ‘what’s your sign’.” Renjun lets out a choked and embarrassed laugh, ducking his head down to look away from you. You can tell he’s about to change his question, so you quickly go back to painting and speak before he can.

“I did apply to work at several museums. I didn’t get any jobs, so I had to look elsewhere and Augusta was hiring. I know it’s not very fitting, but it makes good money and rich people know my name, even if it’s for just a few hours.” Renjun nods at your answer as if he could ever understand the idea of being poor, but the insight into your decision brings a fact to light that Renjun wasn’t 100% aware of before: you’re not like him, you need money.

“Don’t you hate the way people look at you there?” The words tumble out of Renjun’s lips faster than he can process the weight they carry. He turns to face you with guilt pooling in his eyes and his mouth opening and closing to find some words to correct the situation.

“No, I don’t like it.” You surprise him with your quick response, “But people like you don’t understand what it’s like to live paycheck to paycheck, to have to worry about how to pay the bills every month for years on end, always on your toes about money. I bet you think I’m cheap and—”

“No.” Renjun cuts you off promptly before you can continue, “Don’t make me into a jerk. I’m not like that. But the fact that that is the first thing you thought of worries me.” Your eyes widen at that, prompting him to elaborate. “Doesn’t that mean that’s how you think of yourself? Maybe not on the outside, but subconsciously. Sure, I won’t ever be able to understand how you live, but I wish you would not look at yourself as cheap and think of yourself as… beautiful.” Renjun lets the last words linger on his tongue, saying it quietly as if to not startle you.

You stare at him, your paintbrush resting in your hand and your back slouched as you watch him watch you. This is not the type of conversation you thought you’d be having with Renjun tonight, but you have to admit he makes a point. Eventually, you turn to your painting and stare at it some more, making Renjun turn and continue his own work.

“Ah, I asked two questions in a row.” He suddenly breaks the tense atmosphere, making you sigh as you remember you’re just playing a game, “You can ask two questions.”

He allows and relaxes when he sees you go back to painting.

“If you like to draw, why are you a business major?” Now it’s Renjun’s turn to freeze. Maybe if he did ask what your favorite color was he wouldn’t have had to endure this question from you, but he feels like he should answer it since it’s of equal weight to the one he asked you.

“It wasn’t my choice. I will most likely take my father’s place in his company and I need to at least know the basics before that happens.” You nod slowly. He looks so calm when he’s focused on drawing, but it’s not the same calm that you see on his face when he’s playing golf. You turn away before you get caught staring.

“Is that why your mood always changes when your dad is around?”

“Is it that obvious…” He trails off and you nod, “I can’t believe I’m about to say this out loud, but… It’s like everytime I’m around him, or at his office, or at home, my mind goes blank. I don’t feel like talking or thinking at all.” As he speaks, he sets down his utensils and turns to you, making continuous eye contact as he explains. You find yourself feeling comfortable at how easily he’s talking to you about such a deep subject.

“It sounds like… you’re angry.” You turned to face him now too, your paintbrush settled onto your canvas and your full attention on him, “My dad is like that. He gets so angry sometimes that he’s calm. No yelling or fighting, just silence. That’s how I know I messed up when he gets like that.” You nod, remembering all the times he’s been calmly mad at you.

“I don’t know… It’s confusing to me.” He straightens his back and stares at your foot as it moves around aimlessly. “What do I do?” He asks into the air, as if his pencil would suddenly start talking to him like a therapist.

“Just do what makes you happy.” Renjun’s glance over at you makes a smile pull at your lips, “I know it’s easier said than done. But you already know what it is that’ll make you happy, and that’s half of the battle. Why bottle it up?”

Renjun doesn’t know how he’ll ever get the courage to tell his father these things, but the way you’re looking at him as if he can do anything, he starts to feel tingles of confidence trickle into him.

“Oh, and why did you pick me to be your caddie this past weekend?”

���Well…” Renjun plays with his pencil. What is he supposed to say? He doesn’t want you to carry around his father’s heavy golf clubs? He doesn’t like the way his father touches you and gets jealous over it for some unknown reason? Yeah, he’s not going to say.

“Just because… I wanted you next to me.” The way he says it makes it sound so simple and true, but your heart drops to your stomach and springs back up going at 100 miles per hour. You can barely stop your hand from shaking as you pick up your brush, and it’s almost like you can’t see in front of you from the thrill of his words.

“Hey,” Renjun suddenly drops his pencil and turns to you, looking a bit confused and slightly upset, “Didn’t you ask three questions?”

“We’re letting the Lees win again today.” Renjun is in the middle of pulling up the zipper of his jacket when his father drops the news. Renjun’s footsteps stutter slightly at his father’s words and he stops walking next to the older man.

“Again?” He asks as he already thinks up an apology to tell you later when he loses.

“Yes, I need Mr. Lee to be happy when I bring up the new contract to him later in the sauna.” Renjun sighs and continues to walk next to his father. It’s the next weekend, and the third Lee vs. Huang game is starting in just a few minutes.

Renjun won’t lie, purposefully losing to his best friend and his dad every week is not the greatest stroke to Renjun’s ego, especially since Jeno won’t let it down around his other friends.

“Oh, I’ve been meaning to ask you,” Lijun swivels on his heel to look at his son, “Have you been requesting for ___ to be your caddie?”

The questions stuns Renjun, making it hard to answer so his father takes it as a yes.

“Well stop it. Dad wants to have some fun.” He claps a hand on Renjun’s back and  smiles. In the past, Renjun would’ve just rolled his eyes and let his father do whatever he wants, but this time his blood boils. He feels true anger when his father struts away with the intentions of doing whatever he wants to someone Renjun cares about. He can barely move his feet after the old man, his mind cloudy as everyone makes it to the golf carts.

“Let’s have a good game today, Mr. Huang, don’t make it too easy to beat you.” Mr. Lee jokes around and the two old men laugh as they settle into their own golf carts. Renjun walks up to his cart and you wave to him, the white gloves he gave you last week snugly on your hands. Renjun thinks his anger is what spurs him into doing what he does next.

He steps close to you, leaning into your ear and wrapping his hand around your covered ones with his thumb rubbing on your exposed wrist, “Keep these on for me, babe. I don’t want you to be cold.”

The amount of jaws that drops after Renjun’s words makes him bite down his smirk and slide into the front seat of the golf cart, pretending to not see the daggers his father is  throwing at him with his eyes.

Your heart beats so quickly and loudly you’re sure Kara can hear it next to you if she wasn’t busy huffing about what Renjun just did. Sitting in the back seat of the golf cart, you watch the back of Renjun’s head on the way to the first hole. What got into Renjun? Why did he all of a sudden call you ‘babe’ and get so close? Not that you’re opposed to it, you’re just shocked.

The game begins once you reach the first hole, and the Huang’s put up a good fight throughout the entire game, keeping the Lees on their toes and the score sheet even. Everytime Renjun comes back from a shot, you smile at him and tell him good job, which earns you a pat on the back from him that warms you up from the inside out.

Renjun can tell his father is getting more and more annoyed with him; how Renjun is keeping you as far from his father as he possibly can, the gentle touches on your waist that you welcome wholeheartedly compared to the ones Mr. Huang would lay on you before. He likes how angry his father gets, especially knowing that he can’t do anything about it right now. Not to mention, you seem to be enjoying Renjun’s attention, which just adds to his confidence.

Now, your group arrives at the last hole of the game. The Lees step up and swing, setting their total score to 357. All Renjun and his father have to do is move the ball around a bit more to get their score to be higher and the Lees will win the game. Mr. Huang is up first, acting clumsy so that the ball doesn’t make it into the hole and brings the game to Renjun.

As he sets up his posture, his hands suddenly go stiff. This shot is so easy to make, he has made this exact hole several times. He breathes in and out deeply, deciding on if he should throw the game like his father said he should, or give his one last ‘fuck you’ to his Dad.

He glances at you and makes eye contact; you nod your head and smile a bit as if to say ‘go ahead, we all know you can do this.’ Renjun then grips his golf club and swings it back to effortlessly hit the golf ball, rolling it along the green and perfectly into the hole.

You and the other caddies clap for the perfectly executed shot and Jeno and his father come up to Renjun to shake hands. They don’t look upset, instead they look pretty happy for Renjun. However, Renjun’s father is deathly silent, not even congratulating Renjun on his win. Renjun wasn’t expecting a whole ceremony for him, but it does feel nice to put his father down a peg or two today, and that’s the thought that fills Renjun’s head as everyone rides back to the country club.

While getting out of the golf cart, Renjun attempts to turn back to you but is promptly pulled away by the back of his jacket by his father. Renjun yelps and pulls away, but that doesn’t stop Lijun from grabbing onto his son’s arm instead and pulling him inside.

“What was that? I specifically told you to lose the game and you did the exact opposite. How am I supposed to talk to Mr. Lee now?” Renjun’s father fumes, his low voice belting out into the corridor and making some of the passing staff turn their heads.

“That’s not my problem.” Renjun shrugs and his father stops shaking, stepping closer to his son.

“Excuse me?” He asks with menace dripping from his tongue.

“I said, that’s not my problem.” Renjun is fired up. He doesn’t see a way out of this now, no way his behavior is being excused, so might as well go all in.

“You did it for that caddie, ___, right?” His father squints his eyes and turns his head slightly. When Renjun doesn’t answer, Lijun laughs in his face, “It looks like I’m right.”

“What?” Renjun asks dumbly.

“It’s okay. You’re just a boy and you can make some mistakes over a girl, we’ve all been there once or twice.” Lijun fixes Renjun’s jacket and pats his shoulder, his angry disposition turning passive. “Besides, you can’t do much for that girl anyway. Is a ball in a hole really all she deserves?”

“I won the game because I could. I won it because that’s what I wanted.” Renjun states, his blood beginning to boil once again when his father says he doesn’t deserve you. What is he thinking? Does he actually think he has a chance with you? He can keep dreaming.

“We can’t always do whatever we want. There are consequences we have to face for doing whatever we want. Are you ready to face the consequences?” At the question, Renjun is reminded about the words you told him Wednesday night.

‘Just do what makes you happy,’ Those simple words are so hard to turn into reality. Renjun wants to be happy so bad. He wants to be away from this man and he wants to be closer to you. The consequences? Sure, he’ll deal with it all if it means he can stop living in the personal hell his father set up for him. Renjun pushes his father away a bit and steps out of the trap his father pushed him into, making Lijun’s eyes widen.

“Yeah, I’m ready.” Renjun says and turns around, walking back towards the exit of the building.

“Hey, where are you going?” His father shouts after him.

“To do the thing that I want to do the most.” He yells back and walks around the corner, out of sight from his father. Renjun practically runs through the hallways to get back outside and run to you, but you surprise him by greeting him by the saunas. He stops in his steps and you smile as you walk up to him.

“Hey, I just wanted to tell you that you did really well today. I know I said I wanted you to win last week, but I didn’t think you’d actually do it.” You laugh.

“Thanks.” Renjun simply says, afraid of what else could come out if he keeps talking.

“Oh, I also want to give you these back.” You dig out Renjun’s gloves from your pocket, holding them out. This is it. This is the moment Renjun will start to do whatever makes him happy, whatever he wants.

And what he wants right now is you.

He quickly takes the gloves and then tightly grips the wrist of your outstretched hand, leading you down the hallway and around some corner. He hears you exclaim a small ‘woah’ but you let him guide you into a sauna, the door closing tightly behind both of you.

There’s no one else in the room, just the stuffy steam that floats in the small space between you two. Renjun has a tight grip on the gloves you gave back to him and his other hand runs through his hair and messes up the perfect form it held.

“Tell me to stop.” He demands, looking straight into your eyes.

“What?”

“Tell me to stop right now.” He takes a step forward, his eyes full to the brim with lust and his hands shaking with how much he’s holding himself together. You’ve barely been in the room for a minute, but your clothes are already sticking to you from the intense heat.

“I don’t understand,” You reply back as he keeps moving toward you. You take small steps back in return, “I don’t know what I’m stopping you from.” Half of you is playing dumb right now; you know what Renjun wants from you just by the look in his eyes. The other half just wants to hear him say it himself

“I’ll fuck you the way you deserve. Right here, right now.” Renjun’s voice is too angelic to say such nasty words, but he growls them out like he’s a tainted angel. You’re pressed against the wooden wall of the sauna now, Renjun just a step away. You lean into him slightly and rip the gloves out of his hand to throw them to the side.

“Do it.”

It’s all the permission Renjun needs to feverishly connect his lips to yours.

The action is so sudden, you don’t remember how Renjun got close to you so quickly. Despite his forcefulness before, his lips melt into you like chocolate melting over a fire, so hot and delicious that you just want more. His hands hold the sides of your face, pushing back your hair and his body pushing you back into the wall.

He sucks on your bottom lip, softly biting afterwards and making you let out a whimper, and then a moan when his thigh pushes between your legs and further presses you against the wall. Amidst the kissing, you find the zipper of his expensive jacket, unzip it, and pull the piece of clothing off. Afterwards, you pull his shirt off and break the kiss while you’re at it.

“I’ve been thinking about you in this skirt since….” Renjun hums at the thought, his hand sliding up your bare thighs and under your skirt, then he grips your ass and brings your core down onto his thigh, the friction enough to have you letting out a strangled moan.

“Since the day I first saw you.” He finally whispers and connects your lips once again. His hand on your ass doesn’t move, his other hand is placed on your waist as he helps you ride the rough material of his pants. Renjun can only watch your reactions; the way your head lolls back into the wall and your eyes screw shut, holding onto Renjun’s shoulders tight enough he’s sure there will be marks afterwards.

“Fuck— Renjun, don’t stop, please.” He’s mesmerized, absolutely addicted to how you look and sound right now, and it’s all because of him. The thought spurs him along, he removes your jacket and you blindly help him in removing your top and bra. You must look like a mess right now, especially since you’re coming close to your climax just by Renjun’s touch and his thigh. Not to mention the sweat dripping down both of you, a glistening sheen coating your skin that makes Renjun let out a low growl before he leans down and takes one of your nipples in his mouth.

He sucks and swirls his tongue, and you can’t help but moan his name again, digging your fingers into his blonde hair and tugging. Renjun moves from your chest downward, not letting an inch of your stomach and hips go past him without a kiss and a nibble, leaving you breathing heavily. He makes his way down to his knees and folds your skirt up, glancing at  you from his position.

“You don’t wear anything under here except your panties?” You nod, your head stuttering as Renjun applies pressure with his thumb over your slick hole, a wet spot already there to greet him.

“You’re so fucking dirty, baby.” He groans and leans in to swipe his tongue over your center making you shake as a response. He slides your underwear down and throws it somewhere to the side, catching the sigh of your arousal dripping down your thigh. His intense stare makes you shake him, embarrassment crawling over you at how he’s not reacting.

“Are you shy?” You whine, not really answering his question. “You don’t need to be. You’re beautiful.” The softness from his voice contradicts his more dominating tone from before, but you don’t have time to think about it before he dives in. You sigh in content when the pressure in between your hips caused by Renjun turns into pure pleasure. His tongue laps at your essence and his lips suck on your clit, you can tell he’s trying to find what exactly will make you tick.

When Renjun slides a finger into your hole unexpectedly, you jump and whimper a bit but the feeling of him sliding in and out along with his tongue circling and sucking on your clit makes a knot form in the pit of your stomach, tightening up your muscles and making your eyes roll back.

“Right there. Oh my god, right there…” You keep repeating, praying that Renjun treats you good and let’s you come. He adds another finger and you gasp, starting to move your hips in rhythm to his hand, holding onto his shoulders for more stability. He glances up at you, watching your eyes screw shut and your tits bounce as you use his hand to get yourself off. Renjun hums against you, and you can almost feel the ecstasy of coming undone, until Renjun pulls away. You groan, feeling like crying when your orgasm fades.

“Hey..” You whine, pouting when Renjun stands back up and licks your juices off of his lips. He has some on his chin and you bring your hand up to wipe it away, Renjun stopping your hand and kissing the wetness away, then kissing up your arm and to your shoulder, up your neck and to your ear. He tugs at your earlobe, licking the skin under it and biting some more, his hands sliding up your waist at playing with your nipples, pinching a little to get whimpers out of you and making your hips buck up, ready to continue where Renjun left you at.

That’s when you feel the hardness in his pants; it must be painful. That’s why you understand his next words, whispered into the shell of your ear between kisses: “You’re not coming until I’m in you, got it?”

You nod quickly, attaching your hands to Renjun’s zipper and button, undoing them and sliding down his pants.

“But, you’re gonna need to do something for me…” He says, helping you pull down his boxers, watching his angry, red length swing out. You gasp, feeling a bit bad that you just left Renjun like this to eat you out, but you’re sure you can make up to him now.

“What is it? I’ll do it.” Your hands run over Renjun’s sweaty shoulders, moving away some longer hair in the back of his head that’s sticking against his neck.

“You’re gonna have to yell my name. I need you to let everyone know who’s doing this to you— who’s making you feel good, okay?” Your breath gets caught in your throat as the words tumble out of his lips. He tilts his voice higher at the end of every phrase to make him sound innocent, but you’re not fooled.

“There’s people outside…” You mumble back, sending a glance at the door. You know there are several staff and customers walking along the hallways outside. What will they think if they hear you screaming Renjun’s name? Not to talk about what will happen to your job.

Those thoughts melt away when Renjun’s dick slides between your folds slowly, making you turn your gaze back to him and hold on tight as he lubricates himself over your wetness, holding onto your hips so that you don’t move and take anymore than what he’s giving you.

“That’s exactly why I want you to scream. Can you do that for me?” He asks and you nod frantically, doing almost anything to get his dick inside you. You’re not sure what’s going to happen once you step out of this room, but at least you know Renjun is going to give you the best fuck you’ve had in a while, and you know it’ll be worth it for what’s to come after all this.

“Finally…” You moan when Renjun’s length disappears into you inch by inch, going slow as to not hurt you. He sucks in a breath through his teeth as he bottoms out, picking up your thigh to hang it over his hip and wrapping his other arm around your waist to keep you close. You hold onto him, adjusting as he kisses your lips sweetly and carefully, and waits to move his throbbing cock through your velvety walls.

“Go, Renjun, move….” You whisper, and he looks at you confused.

“What was that? I didn’t hear you.” He asks, cocking his head.

“Please, move.” You say louder, but he shakes his head and purses his lips as if he still can’t understand.

“I said, fuck me, Renjun. Please, can you fuck me already?” You all but scream out, your voice almost cracking at how whiny you sound. No doubt, if someone passed by outside they would’ve heard you. The thought makes you tense up, but it feels so good to be able to yell out what you want.

“Your wish, baby.” Renjun mutters before he starts rocking into you. You both groan at the sensation, Renjun’s hips speeding up as he gains more momentum. His lips don’t leave yours, kissing you into oblivion while his dick stuffs you. He has you against the wall, his hips powering away and you don’t dare to disturb him, realizing he’s burning all of his anger away as well.

“Yes, Renjun, fuck me just like that…'' You moan loudly to spur him on, now not really caring about who’s outside or who hears you, just wanting Renjun to know you love how rough he’s going. He presses you higher up the wall and pulls your legs apart more, hitting a new angle that literally makes you scream out, tears mixing with the sweat on your face as he relentlessly pumps into you.

There are so many things going on at the same time. Your hard nipples and soft breasts rubbing against Renjun’s chest, making goosebumps rise on his arms. Your hot and sweaty bodies are basically sliding against each other. The clapping of his hips against yours no doubt attracts attention from outside along with your screams and Renjun’s grunts continuously get louder as you both get closer to the climax.

“I’m gonna come… Renjun, come in me…” You’re already fucked out, the words barely leaving your lips coherently, but Renjun understands and moves his finger down to find your clit, circling his thumb fast and steady, just like everything else he’s doing.

“C’mon come on my cock, babe. Let it out, I wanna hear it.” And just like that, you unwind and scream his name as your orgasm washes over and takes control, making you claw onto any part of Renjun that you can reach. Renjun feels your walls deliciously convulse around him and with a few more sloppy thrusts, he comes into you and fills you up, staying wrapped up in you as you both calm down.

Renjun presses small kisses wherever he feels like as your breathing settles down, his softness and the caring way he rubs at your sides and hips where he was holding so hard that you’re sure to have bruises makes you smile hazily.

“___… I don’t regret any of this.” He whispers into your skin, leaning back to look at you properly. “Do you?”

“No.” You answer truthfully, making his eyes shine and you both smile dumbly, your sticking bodies relaxing. The happy moment doesn’t last long before there’s a knock on the door to the sauna. You and Renjun stiffen up as you glance at the door, waiting for whoever it is to announce themselves.

“Renjun? Son?” Your heart drops to your stomach and you cover your mouth at the voice of Renjun’s father on the other side of the door, but when you turn to Renjun, he doesn’t seem bothered. He sends a smile at you and moves some hair from your face before answering.

“Occupied, go somewhere else. We’re busy.”

[timbertumbr]

Perspective (Ninjago Kai X Reader) Requested

Here you are anon! Sorry if it isn't a Ninja you prefer-

Might have some spoilers if you don't know who Misako is. 

DEFINITE spoilers to the end of season 2.

"Your ability is powerful. But to gain people's trust you need to break their perspective about you. Some may see your gift as an ability capable of destruction and chaos which makes them fear you. Others, myself included, may see your gift as a way to help make the world a better place. So, sugar or cream?" This. The very words that convinced you to join the Ninjas side and the very words you desperately hold onto during your lowest moments. 

It's all about perspective. No matter how many times you've helped the Ninja save the city, some people still don't trust you. Kai especially. The hot head and the "looks" of the team according to him. 

He's always been one to jump into action and ask questions later. Always been the type of person to jump to conclusions and hold onto them for dear life. 

While he may be the most skeptical of the group, doesn't mean most of the ninja didn't treat you with the same skepticism as Kai.

The only people that seem to trust you these days are Sensei Wu, Misako, Zane, and Lloyd. 

Speaking of Misako, you were currently helping her with her latest archeological find while the Ninja were on a mission per her instruction.

"Tiny pickaxe," 

"Got it," 

"Fossil brush," 

"Here ya go," 

"Trowel," 

"Ace of spades, you win," Misako chuckled at the lame joke. You peer over her shoulder while she works.

"What do you think it is?" 

"Well, if it's been stuck in the walls of a heavily guarded chamber for thousands of years, it has to either be something valuable, powerful, or both," You hum in acknowledgment before a loud thud echoed the room, making Misako jump and drop the tiny pickaxe. It fell to the floor as the two of you turned to the door to see the Ninja covered in soot and torn clothes.

"YOU! YOU TRICKED US!" Kai yells, storming into the room and pointing an accusing finger towards you.

"Huh?" 

"Don't 'huh' us! You know exactly what you did!" Jay chipped in. Zane looked back and forth at his teammates.

"Perhaps it would be wise to freshen up and rest. A near-death experience can-" 

"NOT NOW ZANE!" Kai yells. Cole grimaces, inhaling sharply through his teeth before backing out of the room. 

"Kai please-" 

"HOW CAN YOU ALL BE SO BLIND?! THEY TRICKED US INTO GOING INTO THAT DEATH TRAP AND YOU'RE TELLING ME TO CALM DOWN?!" Kai cuts Lloyd off, absolutely furious.

"Kai-" 

"No! They PLANNED this! They wanted us to go in blind to get rid of us! They should've never been invited to the team in the first place and stay in their little evil lair! Once a demon, always a demon," The room went completely silent as Lloyd looked at Kai like he was the dumbest person alive.

"I… I'm… going to get some air," You mumbled before swiftly walking past them and onto the deck of the bounty.

"Kai. I get it, you're angry. But that was literally the DUMBEST thing that ever came out of your mouth," Lloyd grumbles.

"Wha-"

"Lloyd is right. Saying someone never changes is inaccurate. Lloyd is a perfect example of this," Zane chips in.

"And Garmadon. Well, he was originally good, then bad, then good again, but the point is he did change. Multiple times!" Jay points out, feeling a tad guilty for snapping at you.

"And Y/N wasn't the one who told us to go there, my mother did," Misako nods.

"He's right. And if I had known how dangerous it was, I wouldn't have sent you. Y/N as well, no matter how much you perceive them as the villain," Kai looked around and realized he was in the wrong and knew what he had to do.

"Fine, I messed up. I'll apologize," Kai grumbles, leaving the room. They then turned their attention to Jay who looked nervous.

"Okay! Fine! I messed up too! I'll go make an apology gift!" He scrambles out of the room while the trio looked at each other proudly.

____________

You leaned on the bounty looking down at Ninjago city. You were contemplating if you should just pack your bags and leave if that's what they want. You didn't even consider joining till Sensei Wu said his piece.

Kai's words were the straw that broke the camel's back. While contemplating, you realized you did very little to help the team. Why did Wu want you again? For your potential?

Nodding to yourself, you turn around to start packing when you see Kai approaching you. You frown upon seeing his conflicted expression.

"Uh… hey?" -_- Really Kai? That's what made you so conflicted. Shaking your head, you begin walking.

"Hey, where are you going?" Kai asks, confused.

"Leaving," You respond curtly, Kai follows you with a raised brow.

"Well, can you at least hear me out?" 

"I don't want to hear it," Kai was taken aback by how cold you were being. You're usually friendly and patient with everyone, even if they are skeptical. Kai's guilt started to swallow him whole, he caused this.

"Please?" It was a feeble attempt, one that was said just above a whisper and so upset that you'd think a child said it. You pause and sigh, turning around to face the hothead, a sign for him to get on with it.

"Look, I'm sorry for what I said and I have no excuse for it. It was… out of line..." Kai muttered, looking at his feet.

"Okay," You turn on your heel and continue walking while Kai stares at you in shock. 

"Wait, where are you going?!" Kai asks, confused and a little scared.

"I already told you that I'm leaving, for good," Kai's eyes widened in realization, you were leaving the team.

"WHAT?! No, you can't!" 

"First you want me to leave then you want me to stay, can't you make up your mind FOR ONCE?!" You snapped, turning to face him with tears brimming around your eyes.

"Hey, I said I was sorry, didn't I?!" Kai snaps back.

"An apology doesn't just fix everything! I'm done! I'm done being treated like I just murdered someone every day, no matter what I do to show that I'm not what people think I am! I'm done being defined by my abilities that I didn't even ask for! I'm done…" You couldn't stop the emotions and the tears from flooding, once you started you couldn't stop. You wipe at your eyes in a feeble attempt to stop the tears while Kai stared, his guilt consumed him and then some.

"Y/N," He called out, gaining your attention. He extended a hand, a small flame erupting from his palm and waving wildly, a symbol of both their current emotions.

"'Perspective is everything.' That's what Wu said. Some may see this fire as a cause for pain, destruction, and chaos. But to others it warms a house on a winter's night, it's a signal to let those know you need help. 

It's more than just a little flame. And I should've been seeing you the same way. There are good and bad qualities in every person. I've been obsessing over the bad because of my perspective on you. When I should've been looking at both your good traits and flaws equally. 

You said ‘an apology doesn't fix everything,’ right. Well, then what about a thank you? Thank you for being so patient. Thank you for putting up with this for so long even though you didn't deserve it. Thank you for being strong, brave, and kind. Thank you…" Kai trailed off, looking down at the ground in embarrassment while putting out the fire. You stared at him in amazement.

"Ah, that got… long," He muttered. You snicker and then start laughing.

"Th-That's the most thoughtful thing since I got here… and the smartest," You half-joked, earning a playful glare while he smirked.

"Thank you, Kai," He merely shrugged.

"Yeah, yeah. What are friends for?" You perked up at his words.

"I'm your friend?" 

"Well, now you are. Only if you want to though," You smiled.

"I'd love to be your friend Kai," 

"Aww, maaaaan! How am I gonna top that?!" You and Kai turn to see Jay holding a box while muttering to himself. The two of you burst out laughing. It'll take time to repair/make the bonds of friendship, but with a new friend by your side, you're sure to gain the rest of the team's trust.

[lepusrufus]

A cold day and a death wish

Aka, that time Esteria saved Daniela's ass, earning Alcina's respect. Warning for gore!

---

January 20th 1983

Romanian winters sure were frigid in the mountains, so unlike the seaside climate she had grown accustomed to during her lifetime. A lifetime of being stuck in an unwanted family who fiercely shoved their ideas down her throat from the moment she had opened her wide blue eyes into the world.

Esteria shook her head to chase away the past's blurry memories and wrapped the blanket she had taken from her bed more tightly around her shoulders. Of course, the new state her body found itself in did not aid with keeping her warm, blood circulation all but becoming progressively useless since her infection, leaving her extremities perpetually cold. You win some you lose some, she thought with a chuckle.

It was the middle of the day, not that it mattered given the gloomy skies above. Esteria preferred to keep any activities she did in the afternoons, when Lady Dimitrescu was sure to be asleep in her chambers. It was best for the both of them really, as the woman was obviously displeased with what she saw as an invasion of her home in Esteria's presence at the castle. And in all fairness, she wasn't completely in the wrong. Mother Miranda had taken a particular interest in observing the development of her infection and, when she had to go away for a few months, she had apparently shoved that task onto the Lady's shoulders. And that, of course, included Esteria staying at the castle for the time being.

The three daughters would occasionally get up and roam around at any and all hours, doing god knows what, but Lady Dimitrescu was always a woman that stuck to her routine. And besides, the daughters could be quite pleasant company at times, happy to make conversation over a cup of tea, or blood nowadays, or showing her whatever project they were working on at the moment. Sometimes it was a painting while other times it was a new torture device. At least they kept things interesting, right?

The cold marble of the main hall's floor came in contact with skin and she mentally cursed herself for not putting on any shoes, or even socks, before leaving her bedroom. This place was so damn big and had her occasionally stopping to check her surroundings and make sure she had taken the right path, even after over a month of being there, and that only prolonged her walk in the uncomfortable temperature. She just wanted a cup of water and to return to her warm bed.

She was shuffling her way past the stairwell and towards the kitchen when the deafening blast of a gun, echoing ominously through ancient hallways, made her freeze in place. It was close, much too close for comfort.

Her head turned slowly, in an effort to locate the source of the sound but a second shot made her jump in place, eyes snapping to the hall leading to the entrance. Surely no staff member was instructed to shoot something inside the castle, and the daughters seemed to prefer more archaic weapons, so to speak.

Blanket promptly forgotten and left to limply slide off her shoulders and onto the floor, quick steps were taken towards what she hoped was nothing but a misstep. Quick and deliberate, moving close to the wall and keeping to the shadows, hiding as much as possible given her rather tall frame and stark white hair. She passed by grand paintings hanging against the beautifully patterned wallpaper and maneuvered around antique vases, all with precise footsteps, like a predator stalking its prey.

Up until a third shot, this time accompanied by an enraged scream, broke the silence.

"Filthy man-thing!"

Daniela's voice reached her with an unusual high pitch to it, although the growl that came after was no less fierce. There was an odd strain to it too, something that Esteria realized must be caused by pain.

No.

She hastily reached the entrance hall, cool air from the door left wide open hitting her in the face like the world's coldest slap across her features. It made her lips twist into a snarl at the sensation.

Snarl that turned into a growl when her eyes fell upon the scene unfolding there.

Daniela, the ever so sweet youngest daughter, slumped against one of the marble pillars surrounding the portrait of her and her sisters and trying to stop her knees from buckling and giving way to what could only be immense pain. Her sickle was held tightly in one hand, knuckles turning white from the effort, while her eyes sparked like angry mismatched embers towards the man in front of her. A man, who she did not recognize, with a shotgun pointed directly at her, face contorted with anger.

Upon noticing Esteria, he took a handful of stumbling steps back, the barrel now moving between the two women frantically.

"Stay back!" She did. Esteria did not have Alcina's healing abilities and was not particularly keen on getting a bullet to the face. For now. "You wretched witches! Y- You took my wife from me. She came here for work and never came back!"

Daniela groaned for a moment, apparently gathering her strength to reply. "Maybe she doesn't want to go back." Her voice, despite coming out raspy, was sickly sweet, the same tone she used so many times before when toying with her prey, but now the dripping malice behind her words was on full display.

The hunter stomped forward, aiming for another shot, and that's when Esteria's body finally reacted, jumping forward.

Transformations were never painful, no, it felt more like a really good stretch. A stretch of bone and skin down to the very cells, that made her body tingle for a meager moment until a gangly beast with wide eyes like the deepest caverns full of water and silt took her place. The one thing that required some getting used to however, was the mild disorienting sensation that came with her normal vision being completely replaced by black and white and all the grayscale in between, forming fuzzy silhouettes that were brighter or dimmer according to heat signatures.

Long talons screeched against the smooth floor when she pounced, crashing into his body within the blink of an eye.

The shot was fired, however not at its intended target but ending up embedded somewhere in a wall behind them. It broke something priceless for sure, but no matter. There was something more important to deal with at the moment.

The man thrashed under the weight of her claws, his hands trying in vain to push or cause any form of damage. His voice mixed terror and rage in screams that all but scratched against her eardrums.

And he was an intruder.

Not in her home, no, this was not her home to begin with. But if nothing else, she respected Lady Dimitrescu deeply and her daughters had grown on her more than she would like to admit. Hurting Daniela certainly warranted punishment. And punishment she delivered.

Her mouth opened in a fraction of a second, elongated jaws forming an unnaturally wide angle and sharp fangs glistening in the low light. Without another moment of hesitation, she dipped her head, maw clamped shut around his face and those same fangs digging their way through scalp and skin and bone and everything that lay beneath. Sickening cracks, that were more felt than heard with the irking scraping of bone against bone, were accompanied by pained screeches. Esteria shook her head slightly, the movements dislodging some fragments from her mouth and tongue, and then she jerked her head back. Still shut jaws took with them a good portion of the cranium, that was promptly spat out and sent rolling on the marble floor smearing it in crimson, finally putting a stop to any sound or movement from the man.

There was no time to dwell around the corpse however, as a small whimper made its way to her ears. In a moment she was back to her normal self, although her robes were hanging rather loosely and were now soaked in blood on the front, and taking long steps towards the source of the noise.

She kneeled in front of Daniela, who was now also on the floor. "Hey. Hey darling, I'm here, what's wrong?"

One hand came to gently caress a pallid cheek, making sure to use the back of her hand to avoid her talons causing any further pain. She almost recoiled at how frigid the skin was. Frigid and cracking, feeling almost crystalline under her fingers.

Surprisingly enough, Daniela clung to her, shaky hands grabbing fistfuls of her robes and slumping forward with a couple choked sobs.

"P- please. Take me-... take me out of h- here."

Esteria did just that, scooping the girl into her arms and quickly walking down the same hallway she had come from. A few servants were starting to gather around, wide eyed, having heard the commotion and coming to check on what was going on.

"Shut that damned door," Esteria all but barked while stepping around them, although everyone quickly jumped out of her way.

She did not wait for an answer, as she started to make her way up the stairs, when her eyes landed on none other than Alcina Dimitrescu, coming down and freezing for a moment upon noticing the shaking form of her youngest daughter in her arms. The Lady's face contorted with anger, but before any accusations could be made, Esteria spoke up, voice coming in a rushed breath.

"A hunter came in. Please just-... where should I put her?"

Alcina did not answer her however, opting to bend down and take her daughter into her own arms, features immediately softening upon hearing a small whimper from Daniela caused by being shifted around. She cooed at the girl for a moment, whispering words of reassurance that were far too quiet for anyone else to hear.

She turned around, heading back up without another word, and any sensible person would take it as their cue to get lost and mind their own business. But growing up in the woods like some Peter Pan wannabe didn't make sensible people now did it. Esteria followed along, quick steps barely keeping up with the Lady's long determined strides. She followed until they reached a bedroom unfamiliar to her, though by the furniture and decorations, she could assume it was the youngest's chambers. She stepped inside and watched as she placed her daughter on a small couch placed right in front of the fireplace, soft furs covering the patterned cushions.

Not wanting to simply sit by, she helped by gathering a few extra blankets, gears finally turning in her brain, and handing them to Alcina, who by now was gently stroking red locks as Daniela all but glued herself to her mother's lap. Golden eyes snapped at her but the blankets were accepted, unfolded and quickly wrapped around the shivering girl.

Esteria couldn't help placing a hand on Daniela's shoulder and giving it a gentle reassuring squeeze, although she was unsure whether or not it was felt through the multiple layers.

She didn't look at the other woman when she spoke, eyes fixated on her hand, seemingly finding her talons of interest at the moment. "Are they… weak to the cold?"

It was barely a whisper and the reply took so long to arrive that Esteria started to think she had only imagined asking in the first place.

"Were it not for the fact that you're Mother Miranda's pet project, I would kill you for knowing that." Alcina's tone was flat, but the conviction it carried left no room for interpretation on the truthfulness of her words.

Esteria chuckled. That sure was a way to thank someone for saving her daughter.

She decided to take that as her cue to leave, raising slowly and making her way to the door left ajar. A mental note to change her robes and take a bath before returning to bed was also made, the sticky sensation on her skin quite unpleasant. Before she could get a hold on the door handle and exit the room however, the Lady's voice called out for her, uncharacteristic tenderness making its way where sharp pointy edges were mere moments ago.

"Thank you. I'm glad you were there to intervene before any real damage was done."

Esteria managed to hold back a grimace and a snort, remembering that some damage had definitely been done, although most likely to an antique decoration or painting hit by a stray bullet. Keeping her expression under control, she half turned her head, fond smile adorning her lips.

"Of course my Lady."

"Just call me Alcina."

[celestialmango]

I have played don't Starve, it is a very hard game, however, starving is not the reason I die XD At least now reader and their child have the protection of some of the largest monsters, though Glitch now wants his own little survivor. Also, Eclipse and Glitch having crops/stomachs the size of small caves sounds really cool and the two are probably very big ~Shy

That they are, whoever they nom is going to be absolutely terrified, Eclipse's nom victim will calm down pretty fast thanks to Eclipse's calm demeanor and the fact they had not been attacked in the darkness for the first time after their light source finally went out while in his crop, they sat awake almost all night in fear just waiting for it to happen, needless to say Eclipse definitely noticed, then he started purring in an attempt to comfort them causing them to jump, startled by the sudden vibrations.

His captive is still extremely nervous, so he tries different frequencies till he hits the same one cats purr at. This reminds them of their cat that they lost (not dead, not stolen or missing, had to give them away due to being unable to take care of said cat after their boss cut their salary, cat went to a good home, the people they gave their cat to already had a few, they ran a cat rescue because they loved cats alot)

So they close their eyes and pretend the purring was their cat, it did comfort the terrified human who feel asleep and didn't expect to wake. Then they did when a shallow bit of cold water slips into the chamber, they see light through their eyelids and hear wet slaps, they jolt up, the wet slaps are fish and the light? Eclipse swallowed a buoy thinking the lack of light was part of the reason they were scared and shaking during the night. It did help. Once hungry enough they did eat the fish.

Then he spits up the water, his human and their light stay inside. He wants them to be less afraid of him before he does anything else with them, he's being slow as if they're a skittish animal and not a human he swallowed. Once they seem calm enough he finally speaks, what are his first words? A few simple questions to shows he cares "Are you still doing well? Not injured? Enough illumination? Enough food? Correct warmth? Are you still scared?" This frightens them as the questions echo around them, "W-who are you?" The chamber vibrates with a rumbles in slight amusement.

"Who else is here but I? The one that holds you within." Takes human a moment to realize, "y-you're the creature who ate me, why, why am I......." Eclipse hums "Half true, I have swallowed you but you have not been eaten, you are in a different organ. As for why...I have no intention of hurting you, I have been alone in this part of the ocean for a very long time. Rarely am I visited by others." The human is surprised as it hits them,"You were lonely, but why me?" "I have watched many a short time before eating them, but there was a difference with you." "What was the difference?" "You were kind, you were sad, you were alone....you looked like you felt as lonely as I did."

-------

At that point in time Glitch is still looking for his own.

-------

But when he does find them, there is lots of fear, but he can not reach them and that is what saves them, they're given enough time stuck on an island as he circles it to get him attached to them. They are still stuck on that island, but other creatures are unable to attack then due to Glitch's interference.

He eventually gets them to approach close enough to ask him what he wants from them, he's not good at speaking human words, "Kiss" "What." "Kiss..kiss, kiss, kiss." big ass monster had chased and trapped them on an island because he wanted a kiss. He's insisting on it. "You wanted a kiss." "Kiss"...

They figure if they give him that kiss he'll leave them be, so they let him hold them in his hand and lift them up to his face and gives him a kiss, they think it's over, only problem, Glitch was attached and absolutely loved that kiss. Faster than they can react, he just can't help himself because of the overwhelming emotions he's not felt before, he tosses them in his mouth, loves their taste too, once he's done tasting the he almost swallows them into his stomach but stops when he gets a sick feeling.

He wants them inside like the others, he thought the emotions were from wanting to eat them eat them, but he got nauseous when he tried, having them in his mouth is not enough though. Then he remembers his crop, he swallows them into that and there's the correct feeling, the good feeling he wanted.

Human is panicking, they were tricked. Or at least they thought so, till he spits them up hours later because he wanted more affection, even more he wanted to give them affection. Human has no idea how to deal with this situation, other monsters try to get them at this point in time, he just clutches them to his chest and hisses, human is like, ok, wanted a kiss, swallowed me to carry me under water, and wants continued affection but in exchange I've got a big monster protecting me from other monsters....I can work with this. They see him eat the monster then he goes back to affection and they just kinda, accept their fate.

[unloved-cadillac]

Saw your requests were open, hope its okay if I make a small one. Princess!Reader x Knight!Levi where Levi has to go on mission away from the princess and the day he is supposed to come back somebody attempts to kill her.

C/n: love it! I live for Knight Levi. Thanks for requesting and I hope that you enjoy🤍

——————————————————————————

Lessons. (Levi x Reader)

“Checkmate! I win!”

“Princess, this is checkers.”

Y/n laughed as Levi rolled his eyes at her. “Oh whatever. I really want to learn chess.” She says. “I can ask one of the royal advisors to teach you.”

“Don’t you know how to play?”

“Yes. But who is going to protect while you learn?”

Y/n smiles at her knight as he looked around the room. “Do you really have to go? Why don’t you just stay here? With me?” She trails off at the end and Levi looks back her. A small smile forms on his lips and he shakes his head. “They need me, princess. I need to protect this kingdom and you.” He says and Y/n sighs. “Well, when you put it like that...” she places her chin on her palm as she looks down at the checkers board. Levi stares at her and sighs. “I’ll be back in a week. Have some time by yourself. Away from me.” It hurt him just saying that. “No. I like spending time with you so it isn’t a nuisance.”

She looks up at him and smiles. “Who’s going to be here while you’re gone?” She asks, getting a hit serious. “Another guard. Floch Forster. You know him? Brown hair?” He says and she nods. Y/n gets up and starts to walk to him. His armor on and ready as she touches the handle of his sword. “Be careful, okay?” She whispers as she keeps her head down. Levi nods. “I will.”

The next day, Levi left his princess’s side for the first time in a while to go with the army to the neighboring kingdom. Y/n watched him leave from her balcony and sighed. She missed him already. She had grown attached to the grumpy knight who protected her since they were teenagers.

“Princess.” A voice calls her and she turns to see a man standing by her door. “I’m Floch Forster. Your new knight.” He says and she nods. “Hi. Nice to meet you.”

“We have met before. I’m not sure if you remember. But it was at a ball a few weeks back.” Floch says and Y/n nods her head. “Yes I remember.” Floch smiles. “Good.” The ball he was talking about, Y/n couldn’t forget. It was the night Levi and her almost kissed. Y/n had a little too much of champagne and Levi fell victim to her drunk antics. But she really wished he would’ve allowed her to kiss him.

The following days were a bore since Y/n normally spent talking Levi’s ear off about the book she read or talking about the people who visited her father and how they were the fakest people she had ever seen. Now, she just sat quietly in the garden and read her book. “Is something the matter, princess?” Floch asks and she faces him. “Yes. Why?”

“You’ve just been quiet lately. From what I heard, you aren’t like that with Knight Levi.” He says and Y/n smiles. “Well it’s just hard adjusting with him not being here. But it’s just a few more days. Then you are relieved from babysitting me.” She gives him a smile and he chuckles. “But I quite like attending to you, princess.” Floch smirks and Y/n smiles a bit uncomfortably. He means well but Levi is hers. She wouldn’t want anybody else but him to be this close to her.

Levi stood next to Erwin as he furrows his eyebrows. Erwin picks up on his mood. “Everything alright?” He asks and Levi looks up. “I don’t know. I’m getting a..weird feeling.” “It’s probably just the jitters.” Levi nods in agreement but that feeling stayed with him ever since he left Y/n back home.

~~~~

Today was it. Levi was coming home. After a dreadful week, all she wanted to do was to see him. She never wants to be apart from him again. Floch was good but something about him just made her feel uncomfortable. The way he stared at her, asked her way too many questions, flirted. It was things she definitely wasn’t used to.

Was came back saying that Levi and the rest have been delayed on the road and will be back in the night. Since Y/n had something to attend to the next day, she decided to wait to see him tomorrow, insisted by her mother.

Changing into her nightgown, Y/n slips under the sheets with a smile on her face. Tomorrow, the first thing that she’ll see will be Levi’s face.

~~~~

A dark shadow lurks the hallways as it makes its way to the princess’s chamber. The light of lightning and sounds of thunder echoed through the palace. A covered face of black and dagger in its hand, it opens the door. The princess lays in her bed, open and vulnerable as the assassin makes it way to her. ‘One stab. Straight through the heart.’ The orders ring in its head as it stood next to her. A shame. The moonlight made her look gorgeous but this was needed.

As the assassin moved to stab her, Y/n turned around into a more comfortable position, completely avoiding the blade. The sound of material tearing woke her up. “What the..” she turned and the assassin covered her mouth. Her screams muffled as the assassin got its blade.

‘In times when someone has you pinned down and your arms are useless, use your legs. With all your might, push.’

Y/n kicked the person and pushed them off of her as she yelled. “Help! Somebody help!” In a flash, her knight in shining armor appeared at the door. Hair wet and armor soaked. “Levi! Please!” She reached for him and he grabbed her and pushed away. “Run Y/n! Go to your parents!” He yells and Levi fights the assassin with his drawn sword. But Y/n didn’t leave. She stood and watched as Levi fought. The assassin was quick but Levi was faster. Levi and the assassin were in a sword lock and Y/n took the opportunity to take her foot rest and throw it at the man, avoiding Levi.

The person felt o the ground unconscious and dropped the dagger and Levi looked at her. “I thought I told you to run away.” He says, out of breath but relieved. “You know I’m not good at following orders.” She smiles and Levi shakes his, chuckling.

The king and queen along with servants entered her room and Levi held the assassin’s hands behind his back. “Let’s see who this is.” Levi takes out the mask to reveal..

“Floch?” Y/n says and everyone gasps. “Take him to the dungeon. And notify me when he wakes up.” Levi orders and the men take him away. The king and queen search Y/n for any injuries as she assures them that she’s fine and they Levi saved her.

Finally left alone, Y/n smiles at her savior. “Not the way I hoped in welcoming you back.” She chuckles and he walks to her. He stands in front of her as he cups her cheek. “I’m just glad that you’re okay.” He whispers and she looks at his lips. “Can I..give my savior a reward?” She asks and he nods, knowing what she was going to do.

A soft kiss is laid on his lips as her arms wrap around his neck. Levi hums against her and pulls away. “I’m never leaving you again, Y/n.” She smiles as he nuzzled her neck. “I second that.”

“But hey,” she pulls away, “I kicked Floch like how you taught me!” She smiles and Levi ruffles her hair. “You got good aim too, brat. If I didn’t know better I thought you were going to knock me out too.” A pinch on his cheek results in Levi hugging her.

Lessons like that always stuck.

——————————————————————————

“Marry me pwease.”

🖤🤍Thanks for reading🤍🖤

-Caddy.

[blackrosesandwhump]

Whump Prompts Collection

Tag me if any of these inspire you! I'd love to read the result. :)

Asphyxia/suffocation:

Whumpee joins an exploration mission that’s being sent into a place where the air is toxic, so he has to wear some kind of breathing gear; the environment and discomfort cause him to lose his mind and rip the gear off, exposing him to the toxic air and damaging the equipment. The others on the mission have to make an awful decision on who to save.

Denied air, then forced to exercise: muzzle your whumpee or otherwise reduce their breathing ability, then force them to exert themselves. For example, whumper could tape whumpee’s mouth shut, then make them run laps until they pass out. Or force them to wear something that reduces their oxygen intake, then do rigorous chores. Imagine a whumpee on their knees, scrubbing the floor as they struggle to breathe, then passing out on the damp floor amid the cleaning supplies. Such a pretty sight for the whumper to behold…

An airless chamber: whumper has a specialized room that’s been sealed to be airtight, perfect for particularly stubborn whumpees, or even just whumpees that are fun to torture. A couple of minutes in that room, and they emerge weak, gasping, willing to submit just so they don’t have to suffer the horror of suffocation again. And then there’s that one whumpee, the one that won’t break no matter how many times they’re shut in that room. Because it’s not what happens to them that will destroy them, but what happens to the people they love…

Claustrophobia:

Whumpee is tossed into a coffin with their crossed arms bound to their chest and their ankles fastened together, then left there for hours in silence. Claustrophobia sets in and whumpee panics and cries out.

Whumpee is confined to a tiny closet and forgotten while whumper is attacked. Whumpee is discovered by the attackers much much later, completely traumatized.

A is injured and needs to have a brain scan. They start to panic at the idea of being enclosed in such a tight space. The only person who can help calm them down is B, and B is not allowed in the room for whatever reason. Then A sees B through the glass and B’s smile and thumbs-up is enough to help them feel better.

Whumpee is forced to wear an iron mask as punishment. The mask can only be unlocked and removed by someone else, so they’re stuck for an entire day (or however long) unable to speak around the bit in their mouth and also short of breath.

Whumper knows about whumpee’s dislike of anything touching his face and forces whumpee to wear a mask that completely hides his face whenever he’s in whumper’s presence. Eventually the mask becomes part of whumpee’s identity.

Curses/magic:

Hero is given the gift of a scarf. What he doesn’t know is that it’s actually a gift from the Villain. He also doesn’t know it’s been cursed and will strangle him when the time comes. It won’t kill him, though—it will keep him just alive enough for Villain to interrogate him.

Hero is chained up in a dungeon. His chains are cursed so that every struggle causes more chains to coil around him. Villain enters the dungeon to find him completely wrapped in chains: around his neck, across his mouth, restricting his chest. Villain is amused and decides to leave Hero like that for a while longer.

Hero’s weapon is cursed so that every use weakens him for a period of time. The more he uses it, the more it weakens him each time and the harder it is for him to recover. Eventually his body begins to fail from how much he’s wielded it, but he won’t rest because he’s too fixated on using his weapon to its fullest potential.

Miscellaneous:

Whumper knows that whumpee is deathly afraid of buzzing insects, so he slathers whumpee in something sticky and sweet and ties him up so he can’t wipe it off. Then he leaves whumpee outside to be tormented by insects until he’s hoarse from screaming.

Whumper ties whumpee up, but not too painfully and not to torture them; no, this time whumper is going to draw all over whumpee’s skin, to let them know who they belong to now. They’ll be whumper’s canvas, whether they like it or not.

Whumper is given a drug that induces hallucinations and is bound to a chair and left in an empty room for hours…whumper returns to find whumpee bloodied from straining to escape and delirious with fear.

Whumper knows that the rescuers are on their way, so he slices whumpee up just enough to cause him lots of pain, then rolls him up in a rug and dumps him in a corner where the rescuers won’t think to look. Whumpee’s only hope is to make enough noise that they investigate.

Alternately, whumper binds whumpee up and gags him so he can’t move or cry out, then tosses him in a corner as above, so that whumpee can only listen as his rescuers pass by without even knowing he’s right there.

Whumpee has been kept underground for as long as he can remember. He’s never seen sunlight, only fire. The earthquake nearly kills him, but he manages to survive. The sunlight on the surface sends searing pain through his entire body, starting with his eyes. He’s blinded, crippled with agony from the overwhelming light. A human voice breaks through the pain: “We finally found you. Welcome to the surface, whumpee!”

Non-human whumpees:

A fae whumpee is exposed to rain that’s been tainted with iron from an iron factory. The water burns his skin like acid. The whumpee has his chemical burns covered with bandages, but the bandages can’t take away the pain…

Sunlight equals torture. Whumpee knows this all too well. After all, he’s a vampire. But whumper has tied him up in a place where the sunlight is intermittent. Every few minutes, the torture stops and his skin can heal a little…but then the sunlight hits him again, and it’s excruciating.

Whumpee squirms as the sun blazes down on them, panicking because they’ll suffocate as soon as the water in the fountain dries up. They need water to breathe. All merfolk do. But whumpee is chained up and can’t escape. Whumper laughs as whumpee tries to get free. “My little fish out of water. I’ll let you go…as soon as you let me harvest your scales.”

Aerosolized poison for inhuman creatures: poison your whumpees with aerosolized versions of the substances that most afflict them. For example, whumper (maybe a hunter in this case) traps the werewolf whumpee in a chamber rigged with canisters of aerosolized wolfsbane. Or whumper could poison a fae whumpee with an iron-based gas. (Not sure how that would work. Just thinking on the spot here.) Imagine the inhuman whumpee trying to survive by wearing breathing protection, then having it ripped off when whumper attacks them.

Weather/environment:

One of whumpee’s regular tasks is to take care of the garden, which they don’t mind, as it allows them to spend hours outside, away from whumper. They dread rainy days because it means they’re stuck in the house with whumper and can’t escape outside. It’s been storming for days and whumper is in a particularly nasty mood, which means that whumpee is about to suffer even more, and they’re already not in good shape…

Caretaker is desperately searching for whumpee in the rain, but whumpee is nowhere to be found. The rain is getting worse and worse and caretaker is about to give up…but then they spot something in the grass. It’s a leg. No, a whole body. Whumpee’s body. Whumpee is unresponsive, their eyes glazed, their skin ashen. Caretaker sees that they’ve just about drowned from exposure to the downpour, and it might be too late…but caretaker is going to save whumpee, no matter what.

Whumpee is locked up in a tower that’s crumbling into ruin. Whenever it rains, the roof leaks and puddles of water form on the floor. They can’t escape the damp and are left to try to protect themselves with whatever they can find in the tower. After a bad storm, whumper comes to get them, only to find that whumpee has gotten dangerously sick from the cold and wet and needs help. But whumper refuses to call a doctor…

Usually prisoners are kept in the dark. This time, whumpee is kept outside in a wooden cage. Their only relief from the sun comes at night…but night is when whumper lets them out to torture them. And every time whumpee is thrown back in the cage, they can’t escape from the heat and light. A cold cloth on their bruises would be heavenly. But they can only dream about it as they wait for nightfall…

Whumpee is barefoot and lost in a pine forest. Cold and exhausted, they can only stumble forward in the dimming light, feet scratched and bleeding from stepping on countless pine needles. And whumpee has nothing except the shirt on their back to bandage their feet…

While hiking alone, whumpee slips and falls down a small cliff, gashing their side on a sharp rock. Exhausted and bleeding, whumpee can only lie in the gathering darkness and hope someone comes looking for them. To distract themselves, they start reciting all the song lyrics they can remember. As they’re slipping into unconsciousness, they hear a strange echo of the song they’re humming. It’s caretaker, blasting the song as they search for whumpee in the dark.

A thunderstorm hits when whumpee doesn’t expect it, when they’re out on a walk to clear their head and don’t have shelter. Lost in the driving rain and hail, whumpee has no choice but to shelter in the first place they find: an abandoned shed. The next morning, caretaker finds their bruised and soaked body in the one place they hoped whumpee would never find.

[venomousaberration]

Inversion 2: Voices Gone Silent

Trigger Warnings: [character death][character angst][serious emotional distress][empathic overload][trauma response] [auditorily and emotionally intense][raised voices/screaming][aggressive tone and language][listeners and characters in life-threatening danger, emotional distress][crisis depiction][unresolved crisis situation][Wolves growling/barking/snarling aggressively] Summary here: 

Gavin expresses concern about the Freelancer being here with him. He wanted them to be safe and he doesn’t know if they will be safe with him. Given that he would never do anything to hurt them, his worries do not stem from them being in danger over anything he might do. Rather, it’s what he might not be able to do. He doesn’t know if he can keep them safe. The incubus appears to be overwhelmed, struggling to maintain steady breathing but failing to do so. When the Ward sealed, the negative effects Gavin had been experiencing got much worse. Through faltering words, he relays to the Freelancer that he can’t keep the feelings of everyone out. Not the shades, but the humans.

In his words, he explains that any gathering of so many humans can be overwhelming, but usually the emotions are easier to hold at bay. He doesn’t sense everyone’s emotions all the time. It’s usually a choice he could make; A passive, general awareness that he chooses when to make more active. However right now, this is no longer a choice of his. Being stuck in an entire stadium of people, feeling the strongest, most terrible things, his walls aren’t enough. Especially when the Ward is reflecting it all back, trapping it inside. Gavin compares his predicament to being trapped in an echo chamber and its effects just keep getting louder. He is unable to keep their feelings out. The Freelancer then asks if it’s possible for Gavin to get out, to which he responds saying that he can’t. The Ward is able to block any Rifting in or out, just like the kind the Department uses in containment facilities. Gavin mentions that even if he could, he’s not leaving them. He doesn’t care how much it hurts, he’s not letting anything happen to them in here. They’re in this together. and they’re going to get out of it, together whilst helping as many people as they can along the way. Uncertain, the Freelancer asked if he could manage, to which he assured them that he could. Gavin stayed because he could help, even with everything in here. He’s the strongest magical being here and that is not going to waste, not when it can help. Admitting that it does hurt in a voice barely above a whisper, he reveals that he can hear them. Each voice in the spellsong going silent. Every emotion being felt inside this “trap” all at once. But he can’t let it break himself, he has to help. Gavin reveals that helping will make it easier and he’s determined to stop whatever pain he could, do whatever good he could do. He tells the Freelancer to stay close to him, promising that he won’t let anything touch them, vowing that nothing will stop him from keeping them safe. —-------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- On David’s instructions, they make their way out into the training grounds. Near them, a Shade can be heard attacking and draining someone. Cursing, David shifts and engages it in combat, managing to kill it with a measure of exertion. Breathless, he gives Asher directions, urging his companion to get as far out as he can. He attributes his success with dispatching a shade to sheer luck. That particular shade was solid enough to kill, but most of them aren’t. David notices that something about being in wolf form tends to keep the shades at bay but only in areas close to them, presuming that it potentially confuses them and diverts most of them away. Even in this case, there are some shades who get greedy all the same and he has to run the risk of shifting back repeatedly so other people can understand what he’s telling them. He’s yelling at the crowd to keep moving when Asher comes back, announcing that he managed to get some of the Pack on the radio. David promptly interrupts him, warning that more shades are coming. He tells Asher to shift with him and to continue talking. Shifting amidst the crowd’s screaming, the sound of wolves growling, barking and snapping can be heard. Through telepathy, David instructs Asher to take that side of the corridor and to capitalise on the Shade’s confusion, intimidating them as long as they can. He then follows up by asking who answered. Asher proceeds to update him with Arden and Christian’s current location near the VIP Box, in the company of as many people as they could get. They too plan on staying shifted as much as they can to keep the Shades back but are uncertain how long that will last. Amanda, on the other hand, remains on the north end with a group of Energetics, currently heading away from the stadium in efforts to set up a perimeter. Asher recalls that she cut out after that and guesses that she is probably too far for the interference. In addition, he also confirms that Miguel and Leshaun were situated near the stage, approaching with as many people as they can while Brooks is lost in the crowd. He notes that they haven’t been able to raise him since. Everyone else however are either shifted, out of range, lost their radios or…Asher trails off. David finishes the rest of his thoughts with the grim possibility that they’re gone. The alpha of the pack notes being unable to hear any of the others right now and checks in with Asher to see if he could. Asher too is unable to hear the others. He comments on how the link seems to be even more affected than the radios, assuming that they aren’t going to be able to hear any of them when they are shifted until people can get closer. Having gathered all the intel they could on the current state of things, David tells Asher to shift back and stay near him, declaring that he’ll cover him. He asks Asher to get Arden and Christian back on the radio so as to let them know to head north where Amanda is. This is so that they can attempt to set up a safe zone over there with her as well as anyone they could find. Meanwhile, they will try and gather everyone they can on the South side. Until they become tangible, the Shifters are apparently the only thing that’s going to be able to slow them down, though it’s unknown if that will last. David also instructs Asher to keep telling people to head out to the grounds. They’ve been grouping up around them because they think this is a safe spot but they have to keep them moving. Most people are currently still trapped inside so they have to keep this exit moving. Acknowledging David’s plan of action, Asher deshifts. —-------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- Huxley questions where they should be going now as he and Damien attempt to hatch a plan of their own. Damien believes that if they go back in that stadium, they are going to end up dead; If not from a Shade, from friendly fire, or just getting trampled. The Earth elemental then suggests going underground. He could open it up, make a space for them and then seal it above. His suggestion was met with uncertainty from Damien, who explains that since Shades are intangible until they’ve fed enough, they can go through the ground. This would then mean they would be trapped down there with nowhere to move, no room to fight if they phased down toward them. Huxley promptly points out that they can’t fight up here as well anyway. Their powers don’t work on the shades. Damien can’t burn something that isn’t solid and earth goes right through them or them through it whatever he does. What magic works on a Shade? The fire elemental replies that he doesn’t know one hundred percent, since it’s not like they’re common. And they don’t teach this in their classes. This prompts Huxley to reiterate his question, steadying the other by stating that he’s not saying it, he’s asking if he knows anything that could work. Damien takes a moment but eventually answers that wards can hold them off if they are strong enough, but that’s just defensive. Most of their powers aren’t going to be able to do anything. Even the energetics. Electricity wouldn’t work, magnetism wouldn’t work, gravity wouldn’t either if they are intangible and he’s not sure how that would work. And if a Graviton fucks something up trying it, they could make a micro black hole and kill all of them if they’re not careful. When it comes to Sonal energetics, Damien figures that maybe that would work but he doesn’t know how sensitive Shades are to sound. Huxley then follows up by asking what about the magic they can do, faltering momentarily and adding maybe not him since he can’t really do much other than Earth control. Pondering the subject at hand, Damien comes to the conclusion that psychokinesis might be able to push them away since it’s similar to Wards in some ways. He also throws in the possibility of pretending to be something inanimate with illusory magic, since he doesn’t know how precise their senses are. He also entertains the possibility that maybe the Shades can’t see through the cloaking magic of stealths. Unable to think of anything else, he arrives at the end of his guesses, adding that he hasn’t learned how to do any of that. Huxley accepts the answers and reckons they should just try to get as far out as they can by heading towards the outer edge, by the Ward. They’ll think as they go and they can see if they can find others with a plan. Damien promptly agrees. —-------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- Sam asks if Vincent was still able to keep a sense of Lovely’s bearings as they make their way through the stadium. He receives an affirmative and Vincent establishes their current location on the East side, heading towards one of the exits and trying to get out. As they attempt to rush through, Sam stops them once more with the concern that if they were to rush into that crowd, they’ll knock half of them flat on their asses. Vincent acknowledges his point, urging them to continue. However, Sam insists that he go instead, bringing up the observation that those Shades are about to come back for another pass. When asked what he was going to do, Sam responds that he’s going to improvise before telling Vincent to go. Reluctantly, Vincent leaves and attempts to look for Lovely. Muttering under his breath, Sam attempts to intercept a Shade as they get closer, but his attempt is thwarted and he hits the ground cursing. Deciding to try and use magic against it, Sam realises that he can’t do anything that would work. —-------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- To his relief, Vincent is able to finally locate and reunite with Lovely. Hurriedly explaining that he doesn’t know what’s happening, and that the only thing he does know is that Sam said they’re Shades and that they’re from death, he insists that they have to get them out of there before they can figure out what is going on. The vampire alerts his other companion, reassuring Lovely that Sam will be able to hear him as he begins to usher Lovely away towards the open. His relief is short-lived however when they find themselves trapped. A breathless Sam manages to catch up, explaining that the way out has been cut off by the Ward they’ve used to keep all the magic inside the grounds during the Games.They wouldn’t be able to do anything to that Ward as it’s held in place by dozens of Warders on the outside. None of them would be even able to dent it and even if they could, they shouldn’t. When Vincent asks what he meant, he hastens to elaborate, telling the both of them that the Ward is the only thing keeping those Shades from tearing through every unempowered human in Dahlia like a freight train. If they all get out, it’d take months to track them all down. God only knows how many people they’d slaughter along the way. Unable to get out, Vincent then questions what they could do. Sam brings up how he couldn’t do a thing to the Shade he went up against: He jumped right through it and his magic passed by it like nothing. According to him, the shades can’t drain Vincent or himself seeing as they’re not alive the way they look at it. But until they’re solid, they can’t fight them either. Through their discussions, it’s established that the only alternative they have is to stay alive until they can fight. Concerned, Vincent then wonders how many people have to die before they take physical form, to which Sam responds by stating that it’s too damn many. That said, he acknowledges that while he and Vincent are invulnerable to them, Lovely isn’t so they need to move. ----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- Gavin and the Freelancer have almost made it back to the stadium. Concerned with his well-being, the Freelancer checks in with him and Gavin admits that it’s worse for him here but he will manage. He has to. Reminding them to stay close, he begins to redirect the crowd behind him. The incubus manages to cast magic through his pain to keep an oncoming shade at bay. However, his thoughts on channeling what he’s picking up from the crowd’s feelings into magic did not help alleviate any of the discomfort he felt. Though he continues trying, it’s evident that his magic grows weaker and weaker despite his best attempt until it eventually fails. Overwhelmed, Gavin questions what is happening to him. Unable to channel his magic, he struggles, telling the Freelancer that he can’t get what he’s picking up from the crowd out of his head. Meanwhile, Xavier hurries over to them in the midst of chaos, reintroducing himself and asking about what’s happening to Gavin. Urgently needing to get Gavin to safety, Xavier offers to hold the Shades off and tells the Freelancer to get him farther away from the stadium, or he’s gonna be out of commission. Assuring them that they don’t have to worry about him, he hurries off, urging them to keep running. Overwhelmed by the collective pain and fear of the crowd, Gavin realises too late that Xavier’s gotten too close to the Shade in an attempt to keep them at bay when he picks up on his fear. The shade succeeds in draining Xavier despite Gavin’s success in dispatching of it. Stricken at the loss, Gavin informs the Freelancer that he can’t feel Xavier, and that the contra elemental is gone. Determined and desperate not to lose anyone else, the Incubus lets out a roar as his magic explodes, whiting everything out.

[thebeeduo]

(Safe to watch - A genuine discussion about stan culture and Twitter)

Austin: Tubbo, I want to talk about the stans real quick

Tubbo: The stans?

Austin: The stans. Just stan culture in general

Tubbo: Ok

Austin: My question to you is everybody knows about the stans, right chat? Um- Everybody is monkaW-ing. My question is to you Tubbo, is.. What do you love about them? Because I'm sure there's many things to love about them

Tubbo: What do I love about them? Well.. they're that-

Austin: What do you think- How about we start with this. What do you think about them in general?

Tubbo: In general? Well, they're overwhelmingly positive towards me if they're stans of me. But then you see stans of other communities which are overwhelmingly negative. Like, stan as a word has quite a "pre-vision" of what the person is like when you think of what a stan is. But as stans, as the people themselves, they are just that core audience that- of a thing that they absolutely love, if you know what I mean. So I'm sure there are stans of the Austin Show, in the sense that people absolutely love the Austin Show and can't wait to watch the Austin Show, when they're next live, you know?

Austin: There's two

Tubbo: There's two?

Austin: There's literally two. Cole and Maddie, and they're in here right now. I guarantee you there's two of them, their names are Cole and Maddie. They're the only fans that I ha- I mean, look, @ me on twitter @ MrAustinShow on my alt account and let me know if you're a stan of me, ok? Because as far as I am aware we have Cole and Maddie and those are the only two stans that I have. So what you are saying Tubbo is that you can't generalise stans as just being all one thing. It depends on the community

Tubbo: Yeah, like, there are.. there are- like I said, every community has its bad apples. Uh, stans has quite a negative rap. The word "stan" is, like, um.. It's used more to describe the crappier part of the community more than the- Because stans aren't just negative, ok? Stans are that- How do I best describe it? It's that core audience which is gonna support you and watch you basically no matter what, unless.. it turns out you're a terrible person

Austin: Yeah, right

Tubbo: If you know what I mean

Austin: Yeah

Tubbo: So, like, it is that amazing core audience which is overwhelmingly supportive and want to show their support. And um.. and the reason why the negativity [?], because, like, people can- Ahh.. I don't understand. It's difficult because I feel like I don't want to say the one thing and give the wrong impression, if you know what I mean

Austin: No, I got you. No, it's ok we-

Tubbo: Like-

Austin: It's fine. You can think about what you're going to say

Tubbo: Before stans, people who would be considered stans now still existed, if you know what I mean

Austin: Right

Tubbo: But now because there's all of this spotlight on this group of people who are obsessed with these little things

Austin: I see

Tubbo: It makes negatives, like-

Austin: Makes sense

Tubbo: They are.. also the loud, like, minority. Like, so, they are less of the entire audience, but they are the loudest as well

Austin: Yeah, that makes sense

Tubbo: Because I, like, attribute that to the fact that they care the most [?]

Austin: I get what you mean. I get what you mean. Basically, you can't generalise all the stans under one category

Tubbo: Yeah!

Austin: And the thing- the negativity we hear about the stans are a vocal minority that you say that- it's not fair to associate them with everybody

Tubbo: Yeah, and when you think of stans, like, Twitter comes to mind as well, doesn't it?

Austin: Yeah, it does

Tubbo: And the reason why you see negativity is because Twitter's platform is entirely designed off promoting interactions, and your people are way more likely to interact with something that they- that's, like, a negative thing. Aren't they?

Austin: Yeah

Tubbo: Like, outrage spurs so much more of a reaction than a happy dog photo

Austin: That is true

Tubbo: Which is why Twitter is so negative because Twitter just wants to keep you on their website for as long as possible, have you on there as long as possible, have you interact with the most stuff and make them the most money. And that's gonna happen if they promote more of these tweets into your community, which is gonna outrage your community and have this spiral [?] effect of outrage

Austin: It's- yeah

Tubbo: 'Cause they get more time on their platform and more interactions

Austin: It's an echo chamber

Tubbo: Yeah!

Austin: Truly, no matter where you exist, it's an echo chamber for whatever philosophies and things that you- the algorithm is- I think it's important for people to understand this. The algorithm is designed to lock people into these echo chambers and allow them to perpetuate the ideas that they think are much more widely accepted and agreed upon, than it may be within reality. They might just be stuck within this.. So it makes it seem like larger than it is

Tubbo: Yeah!

Austin: Look, there are good things, right. There are good things that are widely- Not all things that are trending are bad

Tubbo: Yeah!

Austin: I don't wanna say that, but there are certain things that are bad that perhaps are exacerbated by the

Tubbo: Well, it's not even the trending tab. The trending tab is not really it. It's like people who pick arguments and get that reaction they want then, like, makes these two sides. I watched this really clever video that I was shown by someone, I can't remember who. It was by this YouTube channel called "[maybe 'Graze' or 'Grays'?]" and it was explaining Twitter about how- If there's two people with opposing views and they're arguing, then they're going to have the people who have come to defend them and the people who attack us. Normally very 50/50. But then, the people who are defending and attacking, instead of going for each other which is how arguments tend to fizzle out, when everyone's exhausted and can't give a shit anymore, they then go to attack people who are defending the same thing, which sparks arguments inside these two halves. And then, it's a domino effect, it's exponential. It keeps going and going. So then, it, like, splits into 4 and then into 8 and then 16, like, different arguments of people kicking the shit out of each other online

Austin: You're absolutely- It's absolutely. You couldn't have described it better

Tubbo: I'm pretty sure there's a mathematical theory about it actually

[cherryjuicegf]

66 and/or 72. I'm so glad you're back and writing Chrysa!!! 💖💖

thank you so much my dear, and thank you for this prompt!! also please accept this as a late birthday gift because i wanted so much to write something separate but my brain refused to work 😔 i hope you like it!! 💞💞

1.2k, tw implied sexual harassment

66. guiding them away from a situation that makes them uncomfortable & 72. giving them little nose kisses.

🌸 send me prompts 🌸

The banquet hall was flooding with life. Music had barely stopped from the time they got there. People were dancing and jumping like there's no tommorow, their laughter echoing in every wall of the mansion and maybe on the streets outside of it. The hall was impressive, drown in golden mosaics on the floor and walls that were made instead of using said gold to feed the starving people of the city. A banquet envied by the wealthiest lords, such was its splendor.

Geralt was suffering.

He was almost sure his doublet was at least one size smaller than his everyday clothes. There were no windows, it was too hot. Too loud. He had convinced himself that if the scent of lust coming from every corner of the hall became just a little bit stronger, he would burst. Or aard something else to make it burst. Either way, not a desirable outcome.

It's for Jaskier, he kept telling himself, it's only for Jaskier.

Said Jaskier was, however, nowhere to be seen. And this shouldn't make him nervous or anxious or sweating with concern, why should it? Only that, for the greatest part of the night, he had noticed a second pair of green eyes staring intensely at the bard. The first pair was his. Well, he had to admit it to himself some time. And the way Jaskier looked tonight, dashing in his silver doublet and charming smiles and sweeping the stage, he didn't have much hope denying it anyway.

He scanned the room. When his look returned to the same place it started, he clenched his fists. No Jaskier. Even worse, no green eyes. The man wasn't a cuckold husband, Geralt knew. He didn't want to kill Jaskier. And except for this case, there was only one alternative; he wanted to fuck him.

And Geralt shouldn't mind, of course he shouldn't. Strangely enough, he didn't even felt jealous. No, what he felt was afraid. Because in the man's eyes there was lust, no doubt. But there was also something else. And their dark shadow, when they met Jaskier's eyes, made the bard shiver.

And Geralt had seen it.

The scent of lust did become stronger eventually. And Geralt would curse the gods and then some, if he didn't realise that he could smell none of it inside the room. Instead, his gaze trailed to the wooden door some meters away from him, one of the many leading to the chambers. And his heart picked up its beat.

With quick steps, he approached and opened the door slightly. He waited for a moment. Listened.

Don't you think we should–

Come on now, I know you like it.

I'm actually–

Geralt cleared his throat loudly and closed the door with an accidental bang. The man in front of Jaskier jumped and turned around. He peered at Geralt and, seeing as the witcher stood tall in front of him, he smiled nervously.

Geralt tilted his head. "The bard is with me," he said in the most politely threatening voice he could muster. The man chuckled and raised his eyebrows in a defeated expression but Geralt's glare didn't let him utter a single word. Instead, he stepped back and passed beside him, disappearing behind the door. And Geralt turned to Jaskier.

And for a second, his heart fluttered. Not because Jaskier looked that bad and if he did, he did a good job in hiding it. But because the heavy scent of discomfort coming from him, the deep blush of his cheeks and the smile he never managed to fake in front of the witcher made Geralt commit otherworldly attempts not to run behind the man and grab him by the collar.

He didn't. He only stepped closer, seeing how Jaskier was still leaning on the wall, his body tense and raised his brows. "Everything okay?"

Jaskier looked at him as if he was just noticing his presence. After some seconds, as though forcing his mind to work, he nodded with a smile. "Yeah, perfectly fine."

Geralt hummed. In the darkness of the corridor, he could still see Jaskier's palms stuck on the wall behind him. He sighed and reached for his hand, holding it tight in his. He could feel its light tremble and he raised his look. Jaskier swallowed. With a snort, Geralt shook his head. "Come."

And pulled him away from the wall. And Jaskier followed. But this time, Geralt smelled no discomfort in the air, no fear. Only trust. And something else. Something that made his heart beat just a bit faster.

Soon, they reached the doors to the garden and stepped on the paved path, going out into the night. It wasn't cold, but cool enough for the breeze to hit their faces. Jaskier didn't seem to mind though. Geralt watched him as he closed his eyes and took a deep breath.

He loosened his grip, but didn't let go. "What about now?"

Jaskier smiled and this time Geralt knew it wasn't fake. "Much better," he said and looked at Geralt with a gaze that made his knees plead to give in. Even like that, flushed in the most unfortunate way, he was beautiful. "Thank you for this. I felt like suffocating in there."

His eyes shone blue, brighter than the most precious of diamonds. Under the moonlight, Geralt discerned their wettness. Admittedly, it was not the first time this happened. But he would lie if he said it ever became any easier. He shook his head and as Jaskier's tears threatened to fall over his smiling facade, he stepped closer and took his face inside his hands. "Hey." Jaskier froze for a second. But then, as though starving, he leaned into the warmth of his touch. Geralt stroked his cheek with his thumb. "Don't fret now. He's gone."

Jaskier nodded with a small huff. Then looked at Geralt, the look in his eyes almost pleading. "Can you do me a favour, Geralt?" Geralt didn't answer, only raised an eyebrow, prompting him to go on. Jaskier bit his lip. "Can you stay close to me for the rest of the night?"

Struggling to ignore the redness of his lips and craving to suck the other man's taste from them, replace it with his own, Geralt smiled faintly. "Yeah, I can do that." He gazed at Jaskier with no special subtlety but damn it, he had drank a bit of wine to justify himself. The bard's nose had gone red from the cold. Without thinking, he leaned and placed a gentle kiss there. "If you want me to."

"But of cour– Geralt." Jaskier's eyes were wide now and slowly, embarassingly slowly, Geralt realised what he's done. And rushed to pull back, clearing his throat, but then Jaskier's hands cupped his on his face. Jaskier looked at him daringly, and raised an eyebrow. "Did you just kiss my nose, Geralt?"

A pause. "No."

Jaskier laughed and oh, what a beautiful sound. He batted his eyelashes, the idiot. "Can you do it again?"

Geralt wouldn't. He really wouldn't, because he had already gone too far making a fool of himself. But he was too close, and Jaskier's hands were warm and his lips– no, his nose looked so kissable. And what else can a man do? So Geralt slowly leaned in and once more, he kissed his nose. And Jaskier giggled and whispered 'again' and really, who was Geralt to refuse? He kissed again with a smile, and again, small, soft kisses that made his lips tingle.

And Jaskier laughed silently under him, his hands holding Geralt's tight, until he met Geralt's eyes again and shook his head. "Stupid, stupid witcher."

And, smiling, he pressed their lips together.