#so like what earphones r yall wearing..

[lesbeana]

chat how much does stretching your own piercing hurt, specifically from 18g to 16g and specifically ur nostril

[pandasized-crevice]

MY FRESH JUST WATCHED KINNPORSCHE EP13 THOUGHTS

oh this ep is full hour,i'm scared....

i got my bingo card lets see if I get anything

IMMEDIATELY SCREAMING

vegas calling pete sexy?(we been knew petes sexy)but to hear vegas say it

also pete doesn't have his bandages🤨

and he's holding petes hand i love that

be who you arrrrreeee

kinn take a good look at porsches face and tell me you believe he's okay😐

more hand holding🥰 i love hand holding🥰

yeah-thats a lie we hold grudges in this house🕴🏻

kinns so happy please🥺

PAPA WE CALL KORN PAPA NOW?!?!👁👁🫥

OOOOOOOH

you telling me vegas is watching a video so he can cook for pete

🚨SHIT ITS HIS DAD🚨

OOOOH TELL HIM VEGAS

WAIT DON'T

YALL SAW HOW HIS DAD FUCKING TURNED HIS RING TO SLAP VEGAS WHAT A WHORE😠

TELL US KINN WHAT SHOULD PORSCHE PUT IN HIS MOUTH😏😏😏

come on porsche tell him

DAMN YOU CHAN WE ALMOST GOT COMMUNICATION

Kinn i love you fr🫶

COME ON KINN YOU KNOW SOMETHING UP WITH HIM

pete my boy:(😭

im going to fucking cry PETE💔

pause: bible and build are so pretty

your life like this cuz your dads an asshole babe

NO STOP VEGAS

TANKHUN MY LOVE

TELL THEM BABE MAKE THEM SEE

NO PETE 🗣YOU WERE NEVER USELESS🗣

PETE NO WHAT THE FUCK GUYS😨

yall respect bible and build they are Acting their asses off rn thats TALENT🫅🫅

im so scared rn yall

OOH I SEE

OH SHIT

what is this girl.........

PAUSE: TANKHUN IK THIS IS A FUNERAL FIT BUT ITS GIVING 🫣😳

aw porsche rubbing kinns shoulder

tag yourself i'm pol crying

THE ATM BRO

PETE MADE IT BACK YES

arm and pol running away and porsche jumping on kinns back?i expect nothing less from those fools

porsche poking pete to see if he's real I love him

poor pete YALL SQUEEZING HIS WOUNDS GUYS

HIS BRUSIES STOP:(😭

pete still trying to smile💔he makes me so sad

hi kim

leave him alone kim

YUH BLOCK THAT MAN CHAY

rip the wik shrine☠️

STOP THE POLAROID

BRO HOW MANY DOES HE HAVE

time for kim to make a chay shrine

YEAH FUCK IT MEMORY CHAY

vegas crying,petes,crying,IM CRYING

porsche that was so fucking sus and obvious😐

don't just believe pete he’s going through it

AH HA kinn knows porsche isn't telling him something AND then this sus phone call? the misunderstandings are coming🕴🏻

aw tankhun loves pete he makes me soft

aw lord what's porsche doing

VEGAS?!

YES GET HIM PORSCHE👊👊👊

so he's asking vegas for help

OH HO VEGAS HAS SEEN PORSCHE'S MOM

porsche do not tell me you brought pete to vegas in exchange for info

porsche has been mafiaed yall🔫🔫

OH MY GOD

DAMN HEADBUTT

porsche wearing the suit jacket is throwing me off idk why

whom?

AYO THESE ARE PORSCHE'S PARENTS GRAVES

if kinn took them there to talk to porsches parents i WILL cry

welp im crying im SOBBING 😭😭😭

SHUT THE FUCK UP😦🚨😳 ITS THE POOL FUCKING SCENE NO WAY🚨

THE WAY I WAS GONNA PUT ON THE BINGO CARD POOL SCENE HAPPENS BUT I THOUGHT NAH NO WAY?!

IM NOT READY I NEED MY EARPHONES🏃🏃

YESSSSSSSSSSS KINN SAID I LOVE YOU TO PORSCHE🥰🙌 (which yes kinn has shown he loves porsche with his actions but him saying the 3 words to porsche is just chefs kiss😙)

porsche pinning kinns hands? 🥴girl BYE

deutache(correct spelling?idk her)bank we finally meet

porsche hun be careful don't fall outta the pool

SCREAMING but without...without the...🫠🫣

i love that they hug after 🫂❤️

porsche please you can trust kinn

shit yall SHIT

GODDAMN IT HE DID LEAVE

love you😊 bye

little baby chay hey girl

wait we taking chay?FOR WHY

this just makes it seem like they're running away😐

bro tankhun loves them he wants to go get them☹️❤️

HEY WHORE TELL US EVERYTHING😠🔫

FUCK THIS PORSCHE WITNESSED HIS PARENTS GET SHOT NOW HIS UNCLE?!

OH HE'S REMEMBERING YES

okay so korn & gun went to get porsche's mom but since she wouldn't leave/porsches dad was like fuck yall they killed them

SHIT IT'S KINN?

but why would he fucking shoot porsches uncle THAT MAKES NO SENSE WHO REALLY DID

PETE'S WITH KINN?!OH HO

H U H AHH PORSCHE WAIT WE NEED KORN TO TELL US THE TRUTH

SHE WAS YOUR W H A T😦🫥😧

AND I DIDNT EVEN GET A FUCKING BINGO DAMNIT

FUCK YALL THE FINALE IS GOING TO BE WILD IM READY YET TERRIFIED

[dongsooks]

Getting drunk with EXO

Y’all don’t let this flop

I am writing this with @wooseook (aka the funniest person alive made me piss my pants a few times before) and we actually did research on this. Enjoy. (Not all the members had something said about their drinking behaviour)

Okay so warning: We will discuss alcohol and drunk behaviour in this. If you are not comfortable then do not read!

Xiuxiu baby face

He might not look like it

but boi be drinking

once he does get drunk

you better hide

esp if you have pissed him off in the last 27 years

at first he is just clingy and cuddly

and yeah you can deal with this

I guess you’d be drunk too

if not lord beware I feel you

and you think it is too nice to be true

it is

he would get out his imaginary notebook and start listing every single time he has felt the slightest bit petty at you

like that one time a year and three months ago you drank from his cup while you had a cold

and he insisted he is cool about it back then

spoiler:

he wasn’t

tells you in detail how you made him feel with your dirty cough mouth and dramatically describes how he saw your lips moving to the cup in slomo knowing he would have to get a new cup of water oh the 30 sec way to the kitchen

and you’d think one time is bad enough

but no he would tell you 87390240847 times

all while still leaning his head against your shoulder 

“See I did think I was okay with it, but the more I thought about it the madder I got”

Suhoney bunny CERTAINLY NOT SUMONEY BC NON OFF YALL GONNA SEE A PENNY OF HIS MONEY ANYWAY OMG STEP BACK FROM MY ULT U BICHZZZZZZ lol

He has two moods

at first he is like

“I’m going to take it slow tonight. No more than one beer for sure”

Mood two hits him two hours before the drinking starts and he walks in with two IKEA bags of alcohol 

He will wadle into the room

“Okay y’all. Pants down we’re gonna get lit tonight!”

what a cool mom ew

starts at 8 pm stops at 8 am 

gets too friendly

will help you with everything you never wanted help with

AT SOME POINT

you will find him with someone gossiping in the kitchen about a certain cold...*cough, cough* haha get it?

will remind people about long forgotten fights and open wounds

unintentionally ends about 3 out of every 10 friendships existing at the party 

even if he knew no one before the party he will leave knowing everyone and their problems

“Are you really over that one time everyone congratulated you 11 minutes late?”

Yixing pls come back we all love and miss you sm u r my fave china boi

took a sip freom Minseoks drink and was wasted

wants to have piggyback rides

and cuddles 

and kisses

and hugs

wants it all

gets red as hecckkkkk

“Are you hot Yixing?”

“Yes”

*takes his shirt off*

ends up stripping on the table while Baek, Chan and Chen cheer

crying at the club

lillrlly

when he gets compliments

he gets super emotional

chokes up while thanking you

like you could say he has nice shoes and he would cry most likely order them for you and forget

is an airhead

would pronouce half the things he says wrong

is back in Korea for a week, can’t speak Korean

would facetime and call everyone

“Wait Jackson is Chinese isn’t he? JUNMYEON GIVE ME YOUR PHONE”

Chopsticks are keys- boy

took a shot because Sehun dared him too

is lightweight #2

becomes the cuddliest person on earth

he is gay sober but his gay intensifies when he is drunk

*puts hands on everyone’s thighs*

would ask you the oddest questions with the most innocent, genuine look on his face

“How do girls know what their cup size is? Is there a magic trick? Do they guess?”

“Isn’t gicing birth a little painful? Cause like the hole is like.. a pea and the

There’s a rollercoaster of emotions and he doesn’t get off the ride 

“Am I really a lightweight?”

“omg no Baekhyun stop crying”

“DON’T LIE TO ME Y/N!”

*5 mins later*

“Hey wanna shower with me very platonically?”

WaaaaaaaAAEEeeeeeeeeeeeee

can drink quite a lot

has two phases 

first he is hype

and i mean H Y P E

he will jump around 

will take pillows and throw them aggressively and then smile like a toddler who was given a treat

is a loud person as it is

but drunk he will scream 

will sing along to songs so loud glasses break

Random high notes for no reason

will get someone to strip 

Says things that have absolutely nothing to do with the conversation he is part of

*conversating about what foods everyone is craving*

“I do want children some day!”

At someone you will have to nail his ass down because he might feel young and fresh

but his body doesn’t

and the second you sit down with him he will lay down, put his head on your lap and fall asleep within like 5 seconds

“No, no, no I don’t wanna go home and sleep I wanna PARTEYYYYY”

Chanyoli ravioli, give me the formuoli

It takes a few drinks to get him drunk

no one really notices when but eventually he is lit the fuck the fuck

pulls out Gucci sunglasses from god knows where and has them on the entire night

forgets he is wearing them and yells at people to find out who has them

winks at himself when walking by a mirror

would swear

would only swear

picks up people while yelling “YEET”

will forget how to walk eventually

starts stumbling backwards

and all the members run towards him fearing for their lives

and he just screams 

“TIMBER”

Kyungfu

So he drinks quietly 

for the first while everyone looks at him to make sure he is still there

then he suddenly isn’t

you will find him in the kitchen 

with a cup of tea he made at some point

earphones in

and he will slowly turn to you with a smile on his lips

jamming

“All my friends are dead, push me to the edge”

and you just back off slowly

“NO WAIT IT’S THIS COOL NEW SONG!”

runs after you but gets distracted because he sees Sehun walk by

“Do you like me?”

And Sehun shrugs his shoulders “Yeah, think so”

“cool thx ily”

Kai

Gets drunk fairly quick

Is really quiet for the most part

sits alone in some corner sometimes you hear him laugh not sure about what

and at some point he will just sit there, no expression

and you will have to ask what’s wrong 

and he looks up at you with teary puppy eyes 

“Wanna play hide and seek?”

and you agree bc no way you’re saying no to him!

But then EVERYONE starts playing hide and seek

Baekhyun suggests to someone to go hide in the shower with a locked door, no clothes and the water running

Sehun eventually falls 

everything escalates

Minseok writes it down in his imaginary notepad

and you notice the culprit is gone

and everyone is like HEY WHERE ON EARTH IS OUR LITTLE PRECIOUS JONGIN??

he walks in a few seconds later with two buckets of chicken

bc he remembered the convo with Chen where they talked about cravings

smiling happily

“Oh and btw Junmom I used your card”

The sassy one 

thinks he can drink a lot

really can’t

can’t walk to save his life

giggles a lot

will hold onto people 

but deny he need it to not fall

is the first member to give into Baek’s request to shower

will open the door after they enter and even if no one is around he will sassily say “not gay” 

does the gayest stuff and says “No homo” but winks while saying it so kinda homo?!?!

at some point he stands next to Chan

arms around each others shoulder

having a little down, both trying to stand, not puke 

and then some girl song comes on, let’s say Pick Me

and with their deepest, manliest voice they start screaming singing along

will stumble and fall about 9 times

gets petty over EVERTHING

and remember how Suho reminded him of the 11 minutes

he will go to every member and look them dead in the eye

“Do you know what my favourite number is?”

“Idk 7?”

“Well, I don’t know either but it is not 11 because someone felt the need to open my wounds, I am sensitive! DO NOT TALK TO ME BUT YOU BETTER HAVE AN EXCUSE ONCE I LET YOU!”