#so its like me of 2021 decided this and im just continuing her dream

[clonewarsahsoka]

I'm a fantasy lover sorrrrrrryyyyyyyyyyyy

[twstwonderlandstuff]

Maid Café w/ First Years! (Ace)

I’ve gone and fucked it up mate Fem! Reader Warnings: A little ‘hehehe’ with the descriptions but not really

It's the end of the month and you spent all your money on basic necessities, and when payday- or I suppose, allowance day- came, Crowley forgot to give you the bloody money to continue living, so you had to scrounge up some money. And hey hey hey, there was a spot open in Monstro Lounge, so you took it. Azul, ever the businessman, took an opportunity on your gender (fem!) and dressed you in a typical maid skirt, ones you'd find in your café anime. 

You've dreamed of wearing one, to be honest; the short skirt, the frills, the open neckline that showed off your collarbone, the white ruffles on the top portion, the cute buttons, black tights that stop just below the skirt, the headband, the tie around your neck, everything. It was everything you wanted and more, really. Well, you didn't HAVE you wear it... but Azul promised a fine, a much finer pay then what you'd usually get if you wear it, and you're desperate for the cash, so...

You began pulling your skirt down. "Senpai, um..." "You can always go back if you want, but..." Azul shot back, an evil smirk placate on his face. He knew what you wanted, and he's going to take advantage of it. "Tch..." You sigh, sitting on the couch, your skirt draping flawlessly. Now the only problem was that there was Maid and Butler Day (yes, that's an official holiday in this world, and you don't question this world's oddities) and according to custom, maids and butlers must give out a Special Treatment consisting of lap pillow, an ear clean out and feeding, which is... hmmm, it’s interesting... no you’re not interested bullshit that’s BULLSHIT Yes, alright, yes, you SO SO want to do it- you crave the attention and WANT IT- but seriously, you thought you'd have a bit of practice first! You're pretty grateful that your friends decide to spare you some of the harassments that'll eventually come.

*Ace* "Hey, prefect." Ace greets coolly, already snickering. "Nice getup." You acknowledge him with a nod and start your act- or was it just an act?  "Welcome, master." You smile at him, grinning cheekily. "What can I get you?" You hand him the menu, your eyes looking directly at him. "Um..." Ace swallows his dry throat, taken aback at your appeal. "I-I'll get the A3." "Of course, master. Please wait a minute." You stand up, taking the menu with it and tugging down your skirt. Ace sits down on the coach and swears. "Fuck." He looks up at your figure, the image completely plastered in his mind. 'Oh god...' - You return, plate in hand. "I'm back, master." You sit back down gently, making sure the plate doesn't fall. "A3, just as you ordered." Ace mutters a thanks, taking the food from you, but you resist his hold. "Master, please let me feed you." You say. He has the gal to laugh, then say: "What, like couples? Aww, I didn't know you wanted me THAT bad, Y/N~" A light blush colors your cheeks, but you answer back: "Well, you know now, master. Now come," You take a scoop of the food and lift it to chin-height. "Say ah~" Now it's Ace's turn to blush, not expecting that. "A-ah..." He swallows the food, temporarily forgetting the situation. "Is good!" "Monstro Lounge serves good food." You agree, breaking character just a bit. Ace seems to collect his nerves, because the next thing he does surprises you. He openly gazes your form, from top to bottom, stopping at certain parts to admire it more. You blush at the sudden attention, but don't say anything- you love it, after all.

- He finishes the meal and sighs in glee. "Mhm, its good." You nod in agreement, a smirk making its way on your lips. It's time for the lap pillow- ahhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh! Calm yourself, good god! You softly pat your lap, like an invitation. "Master, I bet you're feeling a little sleepy. Please feel free to use me as a pillow." Ace knows what you're going for and hey, since you're going so far as to say that, why not use the opportunity? "Sure." He simply says, crawling up to you. His warm fingers meet your warm thighs, making you slightly shift. "Hey, don't move." He grumbles, positioning himself so that he faces inwards, your stomach in front of his eyes. Ahh, you're so warm... he wonders if he can ask for this again sometime in the future... "R-right..." You let a stutter slip. You're adorable, he thinks. Yeah, he's totally going to ask for another lap pillow when this is done- that is if the other first years don't get to it. Ace 'tsk' just thinking about it, jealously flaring up in his heart. Seriously, you're not even his (yet), how can you make him feel this way?! He slowly falls asleep under you, these thoughts swirling in his head. You notice Ace's breathing slow, feeling the cold breeze hit your lower abdomen. You look down at him, happy that he finds your lap satisfying, but you haven't even gotten to the ear cleaning yet, but... You glance back at him, his chest exhaling and inhaling slowly. Maybe you'll let this one slide... after all, what maid disturbs her master when he's asleep?

Ahh, you’re so glad you spend all your times back in your world watching the blue-light screen instead of getting proper sleep- you wouldn’t get to experience THIS gem!

I’ll do the other first years later but now Ace brain rot

I’m a fucking sinner and if my parents find out I wrote this I’d like to d i e thanks

it’s a day after Christmas and I’m here just-

oh god maybe i do want to visit a maid cafe

i’m so fucked im dying that’s it bye

edit: 16/1/2021 why are you like this self my god this is the most ‘ohhh wow it’s steamy but not rlly’ thing I've ever written disgusting

I'm going to to edit some parts i can’t bear to look at this anymore

ace was just simply dominating my brain

there

‘not steamy but like kinda suggestive???’ scenes BEGONE

[sun-stormz]

Genshin Impact Visions & Gods

This has been bugging me since i started playing in mid november, but what makes a certain Archon give a Character their Vision. Considering i couldnt find any official info, I decided to do some research on each Archon and then on the player Characters we have of each element as of beginning of December 2020.

This will contain spoilers on characters & story!

Note: The travelers will not be included due to them not having Visions and having more then one Element.

I am basing this on overlaping themes and not on anything related to the actual Archon. I did add some info on the archons tho, due to this being about Visions and archons

“It is unclear whether Visions are directly granted by its element's corresponding Archon or by the nation's Archon. There is also the possibility that granting a Vision requires approval from both Archons. Yet another possibility is that they are granted by neither, and are instead given by the gods on Celestia.”

-Genshin Wiki on reciving Visions

Starting with my Favourite Element, Electro.

Electro wise, We have five Characters as of right now: Kequin, Razor, Beidou, Fishl and Lisa. The Electro Archon, God of Eternity, Baal, is the ruling Archon of the Area, Inazuma, whitch is the area we are getting in the 1.4 update in 2021.

To start off i read into any info i could find on Baal and i gotta say, she is a interesting Fellow. As of right now we know that Baal has locked Inazuma down and has initiated a Vision Hunt Decree, due to her thinking Visions should be under the sole domain of divinity. She also hasnt handed out any Visions since this decree which means all Electro characters we know have gotten theirs before this drastic change.

Now, why did these 5 characters get their Visions? Well each character has a different reason, from Razor wanting to protect those he calls friends to Lisa simpley saying it would be of use to her and just getting it. From what I've found there isnt really a big overlap in the reciving of the characters, but what is overlaping is their fixation on something.

Razor recived his vision due to him being fixated on getting stronger to protect his friends after he failed to while being dragged away by an abyss mage

Kequin was fixated on sharing her beliefs, that the people of Lyiue shouldnt rely on Rex Lapis and have their Pride and that their views are of Equal importance

Fishl was so fixated on a book series she changed herself to be like the main character, fishl and her Vision manifested in the form of Oz, one of the characters from said book

Beidou was fixated on killing Haishan, a sea monster, from a young age and recived her vision when she did so

Lisa is pretty much fixated on understanding magecraft and the cost of reciveing a Vision.

Now onto a easier Element, Geo

The Archon of Geo and Contracts, Morax, Archon of Lyiue.

Morax or Rex Lapis, was one of the oldest gods, defended Lyiue in the Archon war, the Currency in Teyvat, Mora, is named after him and as of Chp.1 Act 3 we know that he has taken the form of Zhongli and has retired as the Geo Archon.

Morax, Along with Barbatos, are the only two Archons of the Original Seven that havent been replaced.

Now, who are our Geo Characters? Noelle and Ningguang, two dedicated powerhouses! This one is fairly simple, thanks to voicelines we have of Zhongli since he came out as a player character (Bless the pity pull for giving me this man)

In his “About Ningguang” Voiceline he says: ”Despite the multitude of affairs she deals with in a day, Ningguang always continues to press on. A rare gem indeed. I'm reminded of the time that she used to walk barefoot from Yaoguang Shoal to the south wharf, trying to sell her wares as she went. Time is cruel to humans.”

Noelle recived her vision when Jean Acknowledged her hard work when she tried to get into the knights of favonius. in her “Vision” story it states: This was a lucky day that she would always remember, for she would receive recognition from two all-important sources this day: once from Jean, and the other from the gods. Her hard work has been remembered after all.

So for short: Hard working and dedicated = Geo Vision

Next up we have Anemo

Our wonderful Tone deaf bard, Venti or otherwise known as the Archon of Anemo and freedom, Barbatos, the not really ruling Archon of Mondstadt.

Barbatos is a freedom loving guy and refuses to rule over Mondstadt, the city of freedom and is by far the weakest of the Archons, despite this the people of Modstadt still love and adore their windy God.

I went into this one thinking “Oh this is easy, itll be love for freedom or something!” Nope, it surprisingly wasnt. Jean and sucerose recived their visions through their Determination it seems. Sucerose from doing her 159th Dandilion seed Simmering experiment and Jean seemed to be determened to be a good grandmaster and to protect Mondstadt.

That aside, i couldnt find many overlaps with the two, they are both free spirited and love what they do.

Now on to Pyro

Pyro, the Element of the Archon Murata who is also the god of War, is wielded by the fan fav Diluc, as well as Klee, Xiangling, Amber, Bennett and Xinyan.

Not much is known about Murata, Venti describes her as a “ wayward, warmongering wretch” and thats about all we know. She presides over Natlan.

Now to the characters, this was acually the easiest of them all: Passion.

Every Pyro user has a huge amount of passion that a rolemodel or Loved one ignited within them.

This one definitly surprised me the least and i am really excited for when we meet Murata and Natlan.

Diluc has the same passion his father had

Klee has a passion for Explosives that her mother ignited

Xiangling has a passion for food and cooking she got from her father

Amber got her Passion for Mondstadt and the outriders from her grandfather

Bennett got the Passion for adventure from all the old adventurers he calls dads, yes Dads as in plural, that raised him

Xinyan has a passion for Rock, tho i havent found out more of her story due to her being so new.

Now heading onto Hydro

Hydro, along with Dendro, is the only element where we do not know the name of the Archon. All we do know is that they are the Archon of Hydro and Justice and rule over Fontaine.

So straight to the Hydro characters: Barbara, Mona and Xingqiu.

I dont really count Childe due to the only thing talked about is his dilusion and i am rather confused on if he even has a real vision but i still love him lots

Im going to be honest this one really had me running the brain gears for a while.

All three recived their Vision as an extension of the self.

Barbara  got hers after helping a sick boy by singing to him to help him sleep through a fever, Mona rekindeled a learning aid to her vision, to aid her with her search for the truth of the rules of the world and Xingqiu got his after he explained the principles of his clans martial arts anew, litterally saying that martial artists should see Visions as a extension of the self.

Last but definitly not least, Cryo

Cryo, the Element of the Archon know as the Tsaritsa. We acually dont know her corrisponding ideal nor her acual name and this one was just as geargrinding as Hydro.

The Tsaritsa, Ruler of the fatui and the one that gives them their Dilusions, is one interresting lady. We get a description of her from Childe: “Her Royal Highness the Tsaritsa is actually a gentle soul. Too gentle, in fact, and that's why she had to harden herself. Likewise, she declared war against the whole world only because she dreams of peace. Her gaze was cold but pure, arrogant yet sharp. She was not only the sacrosanct Cryo Archon but a true warrior also.”

Kaeya, Chongyun, Diona and Qiqi, our current four Cyro userer, all have rather interesting storys when it comes to how they got their Vision.

All dont accept something

Kaeya felt guilty about hiding who he was from the family that adopted him after his father abandoned him to be a spy in Mondstadt, and told Diluc, someone he used to be very close with, the truth, since then he sees his vision as a stern reminder that he must live his life under a heavy burden of Lies. He pretty much doesnt accept the truth of his situatin and would rather live with that heavy burden

Chonyun is surpressing a part of himself, the condition he has, and as Xiangling says in Chongyuns stories, is denying a part of him. He trys to work around his condition and wont accept it as the way to go about how he practices exocrism.

Diona wont accept the truth about her father being a Alcoholic, and places the blame on the Alcohol industy instead of accepting that he isnt as high and mighty as she thought. She wont accept that her fathers bad control over his drinking habits is the reason he acts as he does and instead blames the alcohol industry.

Qiqi didnt want to accept her death nor does she really accept her Zombie like traits and only uses them when she needs to defend herself.

My theory is the Cyro Visions are recevied when you wont accept the grim reality as it is, if this is positive or negative variates

When it comes to the last element, Dendro, we sadly know nothing nor have we seen any dendro character in action. So that might be a addition later on.

I’m really interrested if we find out the actual criteria for reciving each Vision one day

[f33itan]

🎮👾Aʀᴄᴀᴅɪɴɢ Iɴᴛʀᴏᴠᴇʀᴛs👾🎮 (From my Wattpad)

FYI: F/N in this oneshot means "Friend's Name". I don't wanna choose the name because 1. that's restricting names of whoever you want, and 2. Im to lazy to come up with names every time. LOL- (Also, sorry if I kind of switch from 1st person, 2nd person and 3rd person randomly.)

Feitan POV:

"Hey Feitan! Go change, we're gonna go find an arcade!" Phinks yelled from the doorway.

"Shut up, you're, too, loud."

"Whatever, just change, we're leaving soon!!" Tch, that dude so annoying. Why cant I just read in peace? Finally found a good book, yet he just had to ruin it. Damn it. No point in fighting, him and Shal gonna drag me to arcade whether I change or not. 

A/N: Imagine him in something like that hehehe, or whatever outfit you want him to wear if you don't like that one. :)

-------------

Your POV:

"We're finally getting a break, but if you keep taking your sweet time, were gonna be back in class before you can say, Y/N's a slowpoke!" F/N yelled in your face.

"Maybe if you get out of my face, I would go faster!" Even though you guys nagged each other 24/7, you guys were still the closest friends. You had known F/N since 4th grade, when you guys were partners for an animal project. At the time, you both loved lizards, so you both were excited to work with one another. Next thing you know, its college, and you guys both get into your dream school. (Insert college name) had been your goal for years, but its quite a lot of work. This was your first week long break, and you weren't trying to waste it on getting ready to go to an arcade. After you were finished with everything, you and F/N got into their car and drove to the arcade. They were blasting (Insert song name) and singing along, so you decided to record them.

"This will be funny to look back at later!"

꧁꧂꧁꧂꧁꧂꧁꧂꧁꧂꧁꧂꧁꧂꧁꧂꧁꧂

After about 20 minutes, F/N parked and you both exited the vehicle. They stretched as if they've been in the car for hours, and you thought they were kind of exaggerating.

"Y/N, what if we find you a boyfri-"

"NONONONO I LIKE BEING ALONE NONO BOYFRIENDS NOO!"

"You and your social anxiety need to get out more!" You gave them a little "hmph" before heading inside. You guys played a couple dancing games, 2 player games, a 4D scary game, and some simple joystick games. After a while, you both decided to order some food at a bar, and sat down for a little break.

"What would you two like to drink today?"

(You) "Can I get a -insert drink- and a -insert food/snack- please?"

(F/N) "I'll have an orange juice with a cheeseburger!"

"I'll have your meals out shortly."

꧁꧂꧁꧂꧁꧂꧁꧂꧁꧂꧁꧂꧁꧂꧁꧂꧁꧂

Feitan POV:

"Hey, look over there! Those people look nice! Maybe we should go talk to them!" Shalnark said. Man, socializing? No thanks. Just wanna get back to that damn book. Well, guess arcade has been kind of fun. I guess...

"FEITAN!!! EARTH TO FEI FEI!!!"

"Phinks, don't call me that."

"Whatever, come on let's go!" Why the heck they dragging me? Wait, why we heading to the people over there-

(You) "Uh, hello?"

"Hey! I'm Shalnark, and these are my friends Phinks and Feitan. We were wondering if you guys wanted to go play some arcade games with us!" Stupid Shalnark, being all friendly. Extrovert girl took fat bite out her burger and gave us a muffled "Sure, once were done eating."

Ew, messy. Guess their friends kind of cute though.. wait, WHAT?

-Small timeskip- also back to your POV :

After eating, you, F/N and the trio went off towards the multiplayer things, and you all decided to find some 4 player games. Each time somebody had to sit out, it would be one of the guys. Feitan always volunteered, but Shalnark made them all decide by flipping a coin. You and everybody else were starting to warm up to each other, when Phinks and F/N had an idea. While a 3 player game started, they both snuck off into a corner and devised a plan on how to get you and feitan to interact. Turns out both of you were quite introverted, and they both wanted you two to put yourselves out there and find a partner. After deciding on what to do, they went back to Shal, Fei, and you. You thought they were acting a bit suspicious, but you just shrugged it off.

"Hey Shal, F/N, lets go do something!" Before Feitan could join, reject, or even realize what was going on, Phinks was already dragging F/N and Shalnark in some random direction. Y/N and Feitan just stood there in silence.

"So uh, whhaaattss your favorite... game here?" Feitan just stood silent, staring at you. But, for some odd reason, the silence was comforting, and your thoughts eventually drifted off into the clouds... so much so that you didn't even notice him grab your hand and start pulling you throughout the arcade. Your body just continued moving though, and you didn't bother to question him. After about a minute of walking, you ended up in front of a little fishing game. (Imagine that game where there's that spinning knob thingy and you have to reel in fish with it)

"Wow, wouldn't expect the emo boy to like little kid games like this!" You laughed and gave him a playful shove, which he returned with a silly eye roll.

"Shut it shortie."

"WHAT? YOUR THE SHORT-" You froze. He moved swiftly behind you, lightly pressing his body against yours. He grabbed your hands and put them on the game joysticks.

"Stop, wasting time. Let's, just play, the game." Both of you were blushing, and you continued playing games and making silly jokes for a good hour or so. Little did you know, that Phinks, Shalnark, and F/N got so many videos and pictures of you two...

EXTRA: PHANTOM TROUPE GROUP CHAT ; ABOUT 1 WEEK SINCE ARCADE

Phinks: Hey guys, you won't believe what I have to show you.

Shalnark: Ahem, WE, and I have some too...

Shizuku: What? What's going on?

Pakunoda: Hm?

Hisoka: Oh, do tell~

Phinks: Feitan, you're here right?

                                                                                                        I don't trust you guys..

Phinks: You shouldn't

Machi: Are you guys going to show us or not? You got me curious.

Chrollo: Well, no point in making us wait. Please inform us with your "tea"                                               or whatever it is people say now a days.

Shalnark: Alright, prepare to get your minds blown!

~Phinks and Shalnark send all of the best photos and videos they got, and after a couple minutes of the troupe going through every single one, they started talking again~

Pakunoda: Wow, I didn't expect you to be the caring type Feitan!

Shizuku: I think they're cute together! (ᗒ◡ᗕ) ♡︎

Hisoka: Aw, shes so pretty, might just have to make her mine~

                                      Chrollo kicked Hisoka from the chat

Chrollo: I'm so happy, Fei has finally found a girl 😊

Phinks/Shalnark: When's the wedding?

                                                                                                      I'm giving you to count of 3.  

                                                  I'm gonna torture and kill both of you. Skin you alive.    

Shalnark: I have her number!                        

                                                                                                                                               No-                                                                                                                                                          

Word count (including author notes, etc:) 1244

Wrote January 20, 2021

[shytiff]

 August 2021

1 - morning walk with ness mendel to palm hills. my dumb ass decided to do a bit of run. my heart was screaming by the time we hiked lol. continued with some youtube dance work out at mess. had kanayam as always. the fish and chicken somehow tasted even better than usual. afternoon nap. had muesli and simba again. 

2 - a hectic BP slash usila slash mtbs day with dr arief. Tried sop bebek h syafei and sate bandeng. Worked out w renata to a 20 mins pilates vid and 2 madfit songs and one 5 min stretch. Dinner was tofu soun seaweed and egg soup courtesy of renata. And baked banana with ovomaltine lolll im so grateful friends give me food.

3 - in usila today but turns out theres still one more day of vaccine in kantor kecamatan, so nessa and i went. We screened together w dr arief. Finished at about 2 pm. Can finaly eat at like 3ish after getting to the mess. Felt a bit of headache and my nose starts to go runny. So i slept. But my nose was so blocked. So i asked renata for her boiled noodle. Felt a bit better. Cleared my nose. Slept.

4 - it did feel better, finally. The soreness i felt in my abs yesterday gets worse today lmao. BP w nessa. orientation w dr harnis. talked ngalor ngidul about love life et cetera at our room lol

5 - fasted today. sahur was rice, crispy mushroom and abon since i felt sick of eating egg. it seems that love life talk continued today    at BP w dr anggi. printed stuff at kubang wates. bought kepak bandeng at RM tajuk and some snacks in indomaret. turns out Prof gave me one more ppt to do, for PIT. and the manuscript deadline is on the 8th :) immediately started doing something about it since now i know ppt and word making rly takes time

6 - muesli and pizza from alfia for bfast. vaccine today w dr lutfi. talked with kang ade and turns out he lived in kalideres before lol. bought don’s burger for dinner and ate it with fried egg. 

7 - MTBS today. got a lot of free food. read stranger than friends. went to transmart w nessa to buy stuff. did the word for Prof’s PIT topic acompanied with lofi study on the tv accompanied with nescafe latte. taste kinda.. weird. 

8 - ran a bit today, alone. bought nasi uduk for 5000 and i added scrambled egg. continued the word and finished it at like 11 am. sent it. relaxed for a bit. read black mirror. lunch was from labbaik but things went shit and i ended up paying 72k lol. printed document stuff w nessa and went to palm hills in the golden hour. ate together w the gals. played scrabble and talked a bit with fianti until almost 11 pm.

9 - had left over chicken and pizza for bfast. usila today and the patients came back to back. bought kanayam while waiting for 2 pm. slept. did (so little) work of ECMOCARD SAP. im so research dumb. 

10 - had steak and rice and renata’s veggie soup for bfast. vaccine today at vivo near intermedia with teh dian. waited for a mother with 9cm dilatation in ugd with nessa, but it took so long so i went back first. met up with atikah at o seven lmao. she arrived at like 12 and waited at palm wates. tried carbonara sphagetti (yum! but not fulfilling enough) and fried tofu. slept early and i probably passed out at like 930 pm. atikah was talking w ratnaa and we’re talking about the day’s randomness of atikah’s customer that somehow lives in cilegon

11 - woke up late. drove motorbike around palmhills to sightsee a bit. bfast at nasi uduk place around the corner. did some ngambi-together in green wates, accompanied by atikah’s 2 songs, repeated many times. went to mess. ate seafood in merak (a place near billiard cafe). got fish and shrimp. went to pulau kecil with pak asep’s help. walked around the tiny island. saw a monkey. the waters surprisingly clear. and then after maghrib Prof asked me about the ppt lol. so i hurriedly made it and emailed it, with zoom sesh 2mrw

12 - muesli for bfast. a hectic day today at bp x usila with dr lutfi (she went up for a bit for promkes). leftover kangkung and fish for lunch. hurriedly added some stuff to Prof’s ppt before the zoom sesh at 3. did 1 pamela reif vid and “attempted” her 10 min ab workout. dinner was soun and egg and renata’s veggie. 

13 - vaccine day for ODGJ and special needs children ft. dr Arief. finished at like 10:15. bought discounted wingstop (86k for 20 piece). was about to send Prof’s ppt but turns out there’s a ppt from the sponsor. in english. so i had to mold the 2 ppt and do some translation. finally sent it, and the literature. the sponsor used a lot of old literature lol. 

14 - wingstop and rice for bfast. mtbs today. no patient lmao. bu ningrum gave me cimol again! and a snack called selondok. waited out 2 pm with nessa. there’s a mom that came with upper abdominal pain. it did not improve after ranitidine, so she was referred. mom dad etc came to cilegon. i vacuumed. bujing lia had itches within like 15 mins of entering my room :(( lol. since the bed was put out, renata and i slept in yoga mat lol. nessa went to damkar. but i dreamed of something that night.

15 - mom’s spaghetti for bfast. off to pulau besar at 7 am. walked around the island a bit. swam in pulau kecil. ate at saung bonang (<50k per person!). tidied up the hydrovacuumed bed. a 20 ish minute ab and glutes workout with renata. love life talk. accidentally turned on live video in cld lmao. talked with aisyah due to said live vid. gave some brownies and spaghetti to mendel lol. dinner was mom’s chicken, kentang balado and capcay. 

16 - usila today. lots of patients with dizziness. ate mom’s chicken and spicy potato for lunch. 

17 - free day today. picked up my towel from sodaqo laundry. nasi uduk for breakfast. lazed. washed my undies. lunch was meat soup made by renata. watched run bts while eating indomie. watched extreme job (quite hilarious). filled my logbook. slept at like 12 am

18 - spaghetti for bfast. no patient at kia. promkes about hypertension. some patients at igd today. my mistake today was not realizing the pneumonia on a 8months patient with severely dehydrated diarrhea :( there’s also a 4 yo child whose fever did not improve after like 3 hrs and pct and compress. i have to be better :(. lunch was kanayam. bought chatime together with ness tri. tried lychee milk tea and the taste did not combine well at all. imagined better productivity with nessa even though its less likely to happen lmaooo

19 - fasted and had nongshim carbonara dry ramen for sahur. BP today. Almost bought martabak but its just keBMan on my part.

20 - vaccine day today. Filled logbook. went to mess and went back again to cibeber through the rain when i was called by the teteh. Helped the delivery (the mcroberts, to be exact), and got some hecting. The midwives were rly kind :) ness ren were sleeping so i got some silence for myself. It was nice. Tidied some stuff and slept

21 - mtbs. Whatsapp class for pregnant woman abt c19 vaccine. Bought martabak hokky medium (50k,green tea, chocolate, ceres and cheese). Turns out alfia also bought martabak assen. Fried mom's chicken and ate it with renata's porridge. Movie night, watched under the gods 1 along with popcorn

22 - woke up kinda late if i wanted to run, but the weather was cloudy and nice, so i went out at 7:15ish. ran a bit towards KS complex behind mess. walked through a jogging track, empty houses, krakatau bike park. played badminton with tri. washed undies. ate mom’s food for bfast slash lunch. napped a bit. off to o seven, bringing mom’s brownies. ordered green tea latte (25k), it tasted sweet and i had to remind myself that its not matcha lol. did some logbook and literature search for prof’s ppt. ate renata’s broccoli. folded clothes. tried nessa’s scarlett scrub. put on some lotion. mask. turned on fianti’s candle (smells rly nice and calming!). vcall with fi, scrabble and some talks. and suddenly its 11pm

23 - usila today. quite a lot of patients, so much that i was thirsty. dr yanti called since she needs some preskas docx. lol so sudden. bought mizone and dimsum kuy (10.5k with gofood pickup promo). the dimsum was good and fulfilling. didnt do anything else much in the mess. read a painter behind the curtain. it was rly rly good. all the characters made sense and had great insight. some are assholes (im looking at u, Raymond). ate the keripik mom bought from sidimpuan. first time actually trying it. its actually not that spicy lmao i used to think its the spiciest thing in the world. banana, brownies and protein shake for din din.

24 - empty KIA today. no promkes. or UGD patients. some mentoring on preeclampsia by dr Arif. went to BNI but turns out our card havent been activated yet.  cooked mom’s sphagetti sauce (thats not enough amount) along with egg and cheese. yum. had banana brownies and protein for dinner. started trial to blinkist

25 - BP today. reasonable amount of patients, accompanied by blinkist. tried ngikan by gofood pickup (17.5k). i still prefer kanayam’s fish and nasi liwet. a pregnant woman came to UGD. so i went back at like 7 pm, but turns out the mom went back home lmao. mas apit said i shouldve contacted him. point taken. so a nicely lit cafe along the way to pkm called Serada, so i tried it. It has industrial vibes. Got latte (25k). did some logbook. Read some blinks in bed

26 - vaccine today. Both screening and getting moderna lol. My arm hurts. So far no fever. bought roti O croissant and the usual coffee bread for 12k using gofood. Watched weathering with you. Turned on the candle. Read blinks

27 - arm hurts. but thankfully its mtbs. slept while waiting until 2. kanayam sambal matah for lunchie. finally took PCT that solved my headache and incoming fever and arm pain bcs i dont want to stumble while on the motorbike. watched harry potter #1. washed clothes and filled some logbook, powered by left over serada latte. need to sleep so i wont wake up late 2mrw

28 - mass vaccination in SMP RJ with mendel kak esa. 800ish patients. Lots of food and snacks and coffee. Picked up by mom and dad. Slept on the way. And like magic, when i open my eyes im at the airport. Basking in the silence of my room

29 - relaxed. Moms nasgor for bfast. Met up with atikah puy in kopi sedjenak. Tried their croffle with nutella. Went to racheels since its her online grad day. There were also sil and dev. Lotsss of food was eaten that day. Doughnuts, moms brownies, fruits, phd bigbox. Atikah and puy also came along to racils. Had lots of fun talk.

30 - sahur. Off to cilegon. A bit of road fixture was going on. Stopped in the rest area since i wanted to pee. KIA/ugd today. There was a patient who had an accident with a truck. Her nails were falling off. I panicked when Prof asked for his ppt so i hurriedly finished it. Had moms chicken for iftar. Fell asleep after maghrib

31 - usila. Renata fried bakwan and tofu and fish and chicken. Lotsss of fries yum. We played with makeup and ness set up her ling light. I imitated jks tattoo using eyeliner lol. Did the word for Prof. Jk went live for his bday!! I listened until i fell asleep (lol hes still going)

[your-dietician]

Is Germany nailing diverse and inclusive entertainment? | Film | DW

New Post has been published on https://tattlepress.com/entertainment/is-germany-nailing-diverse-and-inclusive-entertainment-film-dw/

Is Germany nailing diverse and inclusive entertainment? | Film | DW

“Why kiss a frog when you could kiss a princess,” goes the tagline for “Princess Charming,” the self-proclaimed first lesbian reality dating show in the world that is being aired on the German streaming platform TVNOW. Modeled after The Bachelor, the show has several lesbian women vying for the affections of one woman. And for gay men, there’s the show Take Me Out: Boys, Boys, Boys to the same effect.

And then we also have the Heidi Klum-produced-and-hosted show Germany’s Next Topmodel 2021, which features trans model Alex Mariah Peter as its latest winner and Druck, a YouTube series on teenagers in Berlin that aims to represent different ethnic groups in the German capital. It would appear that German TV reflects the kind of pluralism that the country is known for around the world.

Even in the less agile world of cinema, there’s been a steady trend toward greater representation: In recent years, films like Türkisch für Anfänger (2012) — which was spun off from a TV series — and Fack ju Göhte (2013) have also tried to reflect Germany’s changing social structures. But is all this enough?

Transgender person wins ‘Germany’s Next Topmodel’

The winner: Alex

Alex Mariah Peter from Cologne became the first transgender person in the history of the show to win the competition. “Being different is much more normal than we admit to ourselves,” said the 23-year-old, who barely broached the subject of inclusion throughout the season. Speaking about future plans following the victory, the winner said, “First of all, I’m going to get a schnitzel to eat.”

Transgender person wins ‘Germany’s Next Topmodel’

A gender-sensitive avatar

“Inclusion” is now a global catchphrase, and the show also brought it into focus by adding a ‘*’ to its logo — a symbol for diffuse gender roles. Women who were previously marginalized or left out because they were different could now present themselves on GNTM. Refugees, curvy women and transgenders — all got a chance under the spotlight.

Transgender person wins ‘Germany’s Next Topmodel’

Curvy is beautiful

Ukrainian-born Dascha has been living in Germany since she was five and says she was bullied for most of her life. That’s why she didn’t just want to win but also make an important statement: “I want to be an ideal and support people who are bullied.” The confident 21-year-old weighs 85 kilos (187 pounds).

Transgender person wins ‘Germany’s Next Topmodel’

Living the dream

In 2015, Soulin and her family fled Syria and arrived in Germany via Turkey. The 20-year-old was all teary-eyed while modeling for a jeans brand: “I am the girl who could not achieve her dreams. Now I’m here and living my dream.” Soulin is now a model and made it to third place on GNTM.

Transgender person wins ‘Germany’s Next Topmodel’

Small is beautiful

At 1.68 meters (5 ft. 6.1 inches), Romina is hardly someone you would call “short,” but aspirants for GNTM need to be at least 1.76 meters tall. Romina had a very natural look for the show but earlier, she copied stars like Kylie Jenner and even got botox injected into her lips. Now she wants to support young girls who blindly follow social media trends.

Transgender person wins ‘Germany’s Next Topmodel’

Beauty beyond skin color

Sara Nuru’s parents immigrated from Ethiopia, and she says she was the first Black baby to be born at a hospital in the town of Erding in Bavaria. She was also the first Black model to win GNTM in 2009. Nuru has gone places since then and is now involved with developmental projects in her parents’ home country.

Transgender person wins ‘Germany’s Next Topmodel’

Heidi Klum’s ‘circus for models?’

“Germany’s Next Top Model – by Heidi Klum” has been on air since 2006 with the supermodel as its host. For decades, its catwalks only displayed mostly white, slim and tall women with long legs. Transgenders, small-sized women or those with curves had no chance of walking on the ramp.

Transgender person wins ‘Germany’s Next Topmodel’

Physical beauty is skin-deep

Heidi Klum and GNTM boast loyal fans among many Germans, especially young girls, who idolize the show and its models. But critics say that teenage girls often copy anorexic models on GNTM, which sends out the message that beauty is more important than education. This year as well, feminists protested the sexualization of female bodies on the show.

Author: Suzanne Cords

German popular culture seems to be getting more inclusive, at least when it comes to acknowledging the presence and existence of LGBTQ individuals and of people from different ethnic backgrounds. But until now, television and entertainment in general have primarily stuck to stereotypes when portraying such minorities.

And there has been little public discussion on the various dimensions pertaining to diversity that issues like inclusion in society and — by consequence — the representation of minorities in television and entertainment generally should entail.

Too Turkish to be German?

“You can see that homosexuals, transsexuals and others are indeed represented in German television. Germany is much more liberal than other countries,” says actor Dean Baykan, who was born in Germany to Turkish parents. Compared to Germany, other European countries like Hungary, for example, have been very strict in their punitive attitude towards homosexuality, with a recently tabled law there practically outlawing the public representation of lifestyles that don’t fall in line with so-called traditional family values.

“But while Germany is open in some ways, in other ways it’s actually more conservative,” Baykan continues. “For example, foreigners or those with a foreign background are not taken seriously in feature films or in serious acting projects.”

Actor Dean Baykan has missed out on many ‘meaty’ roles

Baykan himself explains how he once almost scored a major role in a popular crime series on a German TV channel — but only almost. “I made it to the final round,” he said, adding that he feels that his Turkish background may have been the reason for producers deciding against him — despite the fact that he has a western first name. Whether his ethnic background was a dealbreaker or not may never be known, but actors like Baykan feel that they are not being considered for certain roles not because of an apparent lack of  talent but rather because casting directors prefer when they are reduced to representing stereotypes.

‘Drug dealers, criminals and weaklings’

Filmmaker Deiu Hao Do agrees with that sort of assessment. The son of Chinese minority immigrants from Vietnam is part of the project Vielfalt im Film (diversity in film), and represents the Berlin Asian Film Network (BAFNET).

“You have Black people selling drugs, Muslims being cast as criminals, Asian women playing weak characters … But there is much more complexity to these ethnic groups, and these also need to be represented,” he told DW.

In a recent survey conducted by Vielfalt im Film, 5,500 participants said they found that such clichés were being perpetuated by the industry. Nearly 88% said that Arabs were usually represented in stereotypical ways on German television. The number was nearly 83% for Muslims in general, nearly 75% for Asians and 56% for Jews, as anti-Semitism is on the rise across many parts of Europe once more.

Born this way

German-Nigerian actor Sheri Hagen

Furthermore, 13% said they had faced bias because of their body shape and weight, while 10% of the participants said they had experienced discrimination because of their sexual identity. The study also mentioned homosexual participants saying that they had tried to hide their sexual orientation in order to improve their chances of finding work or obtaining a certain role in a film or show.

Earlier this year, 185 actors in Germany publicly announced in a newspaper article that they identified as “different” and that it was time for them to publicly acknowledge that they were gay, bisexual, lesbian, queer, non-binary and transsexual. They all demanded more visibility and representation in the German entertainment industry, having been pushed into hiding, ignoring or glossing over their identities.

Indeed, broadcasters themselves have been rather reluctant about addressing their actors’ sexual identities directly, even reflecting a sense of denial in some instances. German actress Ulrike Folkerts, for example, is a lesbian in real life but plays a heterosexual police officer in the crime series Tatort.

In a recent interview with the Süddeutsche Zeitung, she said that she had only recently been asked by the producers of the show — i.e. the regional public broadcaster SWR — to finally reveal her sexual orientation publicly. She refused, saying it was too late to do so.

185 actors revealed their sexual identites in the Süddeutsche Zeitung

Diversity = complexity?

Actor Sheri Hagen says that the concept of diversity is not just limited to having LGBTQ stars and the token person with a non-German background being featured in a show. The Lagos-born actor moved to Germany in the early 1990s. She identifies as being a German with Nigerian roots.

Hagen has acted in films like the Oscar-winning Das Leben der Anderen or the previously mentioned television crime series Tatort, and often speaks about the importance of greater inclusion in the German entertainment industry.

“Diversity for me is not just about skin color or gender, which is what the dominant thinking in the German film industry, is” she says, adding that diversity also “includes disabilities, sexual identity, weight-based discrimination, east-west discrimination — especially here in Germany — class-based differences, ethnic differences, cultural differences, skin color and more.”

Filmmaker Deiu Hao Do agrees that in this context, it is important to understand how these various dimensions of diversity and the related aspects of potential discrimination interact with each other. Fighting this sort of exclusion is central to promoting the cause of diversity, he stressed.

Deiu Hao Do: campaigning for inclusion

A sore lack of perspective

Streaming platforms have created alternative ways for filmmakers from around the world to showcase their work and reach new audiences. And while content from some parts of the world has certainly capitalized on this potential, these new opportunities haven’t translated into creating a greater amount of diverse streaming content coming from Germany.

Hagen says that Germany can learn a lot from best practices of inclusion currently employed  in the British film industry, where shows like Bridgerton and a recent limited series on the life of Anne Boleyn, second wife of King Henry VIII, have used colorblind casting as a means to promote diversity even in period dramas.

Contemporary African filmmakers: Names to remember

Tsitsi Dangarembga

Dangarembga is not only a filmmaker but also successfully writes novels and screenplays, including for the film 1993 “Neria” that went on to become the most-watched film in Zimbabwe. In 2020, Dangarembga was arrested in Harare at a protest against government corruption and still faces trial a year later.

Contemporary African filmmakers: Names to remember

Wanuri Kahiu

Born in Nairobi in 1980, the director had a global cinema success with her 2018 film “Rafiki.” The first Kenyan film shown at the Cannes Film Festival, it portrays a love affair between two young Kenyan women and was banned in her home country. Kahui is now off to Hollywood, where she will direct “The Thing about Jellyfish,” based on the acclaimed novel by Ali Benjamin.

Contemporary African filmmakers: Names to remember

Kemi Adetiba

The Nigerian filmmaker, who also makes television series and music videos, is a big name in Nollywood — which is what people call Nigerian cinema, the second most productive in the world after Indian film. Commercially, Adetiba’s feature films are hugely successful. She is producing her next film, a sequel to her blockbuster “King of Boys,” exclusively for Netflix.

Contemporary African filmmakers: Names to remember

Kunle Afolayan

The Nigerian director is one of the most important representatives of the new Nigerian cinema (“New Nollywood”), which is characterized by narrative complexity, a new aesthetic — and a much bigger budget. Afolayan’s thriller “The Figurine — Araromire” (2009), one of Nigeria’s most commercially successful films, is considered to have launched the movement.

Contemporary African filmmakers: Names to remember

Abderrahmane Sissako

Sissako’s films deal with topics including globalization, terrorism and exile. Born in Mauritania and raised in Mali, the film director and producer is considered one of the best-known filmmakers from sub-Saharan Africa. His 2014 film “Timbuktu” was nominated for Best Foreign Language Film at the Oscars and won several prizes at France’s Cesar Awards as well as at the Cannes Film Festival.

Contemporary African filmmakers: Names to remember

Philippe Lacote

The film director from the Ivory Coast most recently premiered “La Nuit des Roies” (2020) at the Venice International Film Festival. The film, reminiscent of the stories from the “One Thousand and One Nights” Arabian folk takes, tells the story of convicted criminal named Zama who becomes a convincing storyteller in order to survive at La Maca prison in the Ivory Coast capital, Abidjan.

Contemporary African filmmakers: Names to remember

Macherie Ekwa Bahango

Promising new talent: The 27-year-old director from the Democratic Republic of Congo saw her film “Maki’La” debut at the 2018 Berlin Film Festival. The young self-taught director spent three years working on her first feature film, which is the story of a group of street children in Kinshasa. The film won top prize at the Ecrans Noirs African film festival in Cameroon.

Contemporary African filmmakers: Names to remember

Moussa Toure

Moussa Toure is a Senegalese film director, producer and screenwriter and has long been a major figure in African cinema. His feature films and documentaries are often political. Toure describes his 2012 film “La Pirogue,” which tells the story of refugees’ journey by boat from Africa to Europe, as a “slap in the face of the Senegalese government.”

Author: Maria John Sánchez

Sheri Hagen says that diversity is indeed not about the token actor of color in a television series but rather about a more holistic approach. The recently aired German TV-series Breaking Even, which stars Ugandan-German actor Lorna Ishema in the main role, is a case-in-point for her. Hagen says that diversity is also about who’s writing the story, how these stories are communicated and who executes these ideas on camera.

As of today, she adds, the boards of most German media broadcasters are still “male and white” — and her assessment is, de facto, not wrong. Dieu Hao Do agrees that in order “to acknowledge the multiple perspectives in storytelling,” the German television and film industry needs more diversity, “and this is something we don’t have at the moment.”

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[ajourneytomylife]

09th of June, 2021

It's been a while. Hello! I hope you are fine.

Today, many things have happened. Well, not so many, but all of it had a pull for my emotions.

It was around 3:00 P.M. today. I finally had a chance to let go of my emotions. You might be lost while reading this, but let me clue you in. I did not get accepted into my dream university. Since I was in grade 8, when I decided I will be a Psychologist, I already choose Pamantasang Lungsod ng Maynila as my school. Before, I do not care about its standing or reputation, honestly. I just want to study there because it was also the school where my best friend is planning to apply to. After all, her Ate studied there, and she's really smart.

"Naku, hindi ka pwede d'yan. Mga taga-Manila lang tinatanggap," many people have said to me, even my family. I didn't listen to them, though. I just replied, "Pwede na kami."

I carried that dream with me through the rest of my high school. My mind becomes so fixated with it, that I am so sure I will really study there. Whenever I and my friends had the chance to talk about the future and our endeavors, I always say, "Sa PLM ako mag-aaral."

Funny how those words didn't come true. Well, it's not funny. It's actually really sad.

June 08, 2021, at exactly 5:00 PM, PLM released the passers. My heart was beating so loud, I thought it was going to escape my chest. As I type my name in the search bar, my fingers were trembling--from the cold, because it was rainy? or because my future was in front of me waiting to be revealed...revealed...revealed...

"But where's my name?" I thought.

"Oh, maybe they mess up my surname's spelling. Hmm, right. People tend to do this. Lemme type 'GARCIA'..."

Revealed...

Revealed...

Revealed...

Nothing's revealed. My name is not there.

Suddenly, I forgot what I am doing. I did not cry. I just...nothing. I continued doing my assignments, watched anime, read a book, congratulated my friends who passed. Nothing.

(Typing this is challenging. Remembering myself yesterday, seeing vividly how pathetic I am denying the truth in front of me. Lol.)

It's like I took the results so lightly as if I didn't care. Na parang nawalang parang bula 'yung ilang taon kong pangangarap na makapasok sa PLM. Na parang hindi ako nagdasal ng araw at gabi, hinihiling kay Lord, Mother Mary, at ibang Saints na tulungan akong makapasa.

Nothing.

And all that nothing leads me today. 3:00 PM. Finally, I cried. I cried and I ask, and I doubt, and I cried again.

Bakit hindi ako nakapasa? Saan ako nagkulang? Anong mali? Hindi naman yata ako magaling talaga. Paano na future ko? Hindi na nga ko madiskarte sa buhay, hindi pa ko matalino. Paano ako makakahanap ng trabaho? Paano ako magiging magaling na sikolohista? Bakit hindi ako nakapasa? Nakakahiya kela Kuya. Bakit? Bakit? Bakit?

I cried so hard, and so long, that when my friends came into my house by surprise first thing they tell me was, "Bagong gising ka, Clars?" because my eyes were puffy. I told them no.

But I was so happy they came, ecstatic even. Today was probably the day I have spoken the longest in a span of three months (since their last visit.) And I am grateful for them. For having, literally the best timing in visiting me. They helped me forget the drama I went through just before they came.

Well, certainly that's not the last cry I will cry. I will definitely weep again because of the PLMAT result. I am devastated, okay? Disappointed. And I guess being disappointed in yourself hurts more than feeling that way towards others? Because you know the things you could've done right, know the things where you went wrong, and know how much you dreamed and wished for something to happen, and then it didn't happen.

I am sleepy I do not want to type this anymore. My writing here's ugly because I haven't read anything in a while.

Welp, I guess I'll just end my blog here. See, not many things have happened, I know. But I felt a lot of things today and a much more intense feeling than normal. I have an emotional range of a goldfish so, there's that.

PS. Also Munimuni comeback, but TJ leaving the band. AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA im such a wreck today. I cried, laughed, and then cried again. sheesh.

[shytiff]

May Small Wins

1 - lazed, went to racheel’s place and put my motorbike there, went to slipi jaya with silvi devi reza to watch seobok (it was fun!!), had iftar at the yumz green sedayu. It was raining when we get back. prayed maghrib and isya in some random mosque. went back and arrived at like 8 past sumn. showered, slept like a babyy

2 - lazed, slept and woke up at like 11, went to nila’s house, practiced doing eyeliner by borrowing nila's (focallure brand), iftar at green sedayu foodcourt (originally intended to go to the yumz but it enforces actual distancing) with angkot ppl minus tik will. Arrived home at about 9-ish.

3 - magang as usual. Went to rm. Took mrt to lebak bulus. My inaco salary finally came. My head kinda hurts after tarawih. Ended up skimming over bj alex lmaooo. Did not shower today lol,,,,

4 - added dr dafsah's revision to the excel database otw to rsf. Pak nardi took a while to arrive. Left rsf early to go to the bank. I (((finally))) activated m-banking lmaooo wow the features are neat wow im not jahiliah anymore. Found this method of just let it sweat anyway during tarawih lmaoo. Preferably with long sleeves bcs somehow you feel less of the sweaty feel compared to tshirt.

5 - sampling - data entry - RM as usual. Theres no new RM. Read a goood dramione fic by bex chan even if its not complete, its okay. Im okay :"))). Iftar was soup, salad, chicken katsu and french fries. Its been 2 days that i practiced sleeping-to-rain-sound. The first night was spent as a dreamless quick sleep (its over before you knew it), but tonight i dreamed abt almira's wedding lmaoo.

6 - no sampling today!! Still went to rsf tooo go to the mall w regen lmao. Did some data entry. Went to PP by mrt. Went back by going to halte gbk and thankfully the kalideres one arrived after only waiting for 5 mins. Its surprisingly quick, compared to lebak bulus - pesakih trip. Took abt 20 mins to jelambar.

7 - no sampling today too. Dr vera gave us lebaran cookies! Did gcp for bu suryati a5. Went to rm, finally finished the available rm. Went home early. Can finally relax since its the weekend.

8 - literally laid in bed til my body hurts. Rly want to read sumn but dunno what. Finally decided to read momoiro heaven. And rere hello. And after iftar i read lack of love. And just like tht, my saturday was gone. Cant bring myself to do things

9 - its another day of lazying (or self sabotaging, cant tell). Read spy family and its effin hilarious. Wasted my sunday. Cant bring myself to even move and i just laid in bed all day.

10 - last day of work in the weeekend lmao. Felt better than being in AR, but still not that much productivity. Went to RM. Phone call w fianti along the way to plan food in almira's bridal shower. Went back at 12-ish. Picked up my dress from risma busana. Walked to and fro halte kebon jeruk. Prayed zuhur close to ashar in kfc's mushola. Felt better after ~8k steps. Had homelab's green tea mixed with vsoy. It honestly made me feel better. Matcha, or caffeine, sure is amazing. At least i had a sense of normalcy before losing all the will to self-care

11 - consumed internet entertainment u til i was sick and tired of it. Watched a lot of cut videos. Granny came and stayed over. So i slept upstairs

12 - same as 11 but upstairs. More relatives came near iftar time so i excused myself to shower. Slept in mom n dads room at like 12-ish. Watched hp goblet of fire since keisha and karins newest obsession was draco. We squealed together over liking enemies to lovers trope haha,,,,

13 - Somehow all of dad's jakarta relatives came for lebaran. the last time i checked, there were some bridges being burned. prayed eid at home. watched perempuan tanah jahanam (which was surprisingly not scary). ate. napped. talked about personal things w keisha and karin. i cant believe the time has finally come where we talk about this kinda stuff. watched you’re next (it barely has any plot, just gore). they went back at about 8 pm and i just sleptttt yall lmao i didnt shower today. disgusting, i know

14 - cam barely get out of bed. Managed to shower at zuhur time. Watched dalbang and laughed like crazy bcs its just that funny. Read fanfics. Tiktok. Ate once and had greenfield yogurt at the evening. Fell asleep. Woke up at 1 and snacked on 1 pack of oat krunch

15 - run bts. Originally planned to go to flavola but it was still closed, so i went to dm's dunkin. Ordered orange juice and oeanut choco donut but somehow the price wasnt package price hhh. Turns out my clires account was somehow banned. So i contacted the admin. Instead of doing dr dafsah's excel i ended up taking off the makara sticker from my laptop. Bought some stuff for almira's bridal shower. Bought arirang at hari2 (its funny bcs yesterday i was seeing online marketplace, planning to buy it, but turns out hari2 the magical place had buy 2 get +1 deal for arirang.

16 - run bts. Managed to move my body a bit. Did 20 squats (ill elaborate on this later). That improved my mood. Tidied up some of my stuff. Saw the paper bag of random memorabilias by friends.

17 - went to rsf by tj. left kalideres 06:45 and arrived at RSF 8:15. sampling. went to RM (still no new ones). picked up by mom. went to salemba for almira’s bridal shower. originally planned to get padang at citra minang behind BK but it was closed. so we drove around looking for open ones. ended up buying it in a small (but crowded) padang place near a big padang restaurant lmao. was the first one to arrive at acacia. checked in, pulled the bed near the wall. showered. its hilarious sometimes with a bit more serious discussion anjayy. went home w febby who drove and clara

18 - went to mcd to get lunch (since everyone’s fasting) and tried to muster the will to do something. i didnt manage to do anything except shopping online (brought dusty pink hijab at hijup). got spicy chicken and iced coffee. (spoiler alert: tomorrow i got mencret2 lmaooo). read my suha and beyond the skidipapap its actually rly good

19 - went to RSF (with mom as usual. quickly snapped RM pictures while mom was waiting. went with her to mami’s house bcs she and uwak will fly to banjar. finally got to meet haekal, he’s such a smiley babyy its basically free therapy. planned outing with nisa lmao. from soekarno hatta we went to vintage vibes lmao since we’re already out. vintage vibes is more crowded now. and there’s less good findings now. went back emptyhanded. ate chicken arirang since there’s no food. fell asleep at like 06:30 until early morning lmaooo

20 - woke up at 2-ish am, played my phone, fell asleep at like 9?, woke up again at 11 lmaooo. went to sbux. had matcha latte. did some inaco work. todays the most productive ive been this week.

21 - went to gi with febby to also meet up with fi, bought falsies and glue (later proved to be of a horrible quality), siraman and pengajian almira (first time seeing an actual siraman), went to blok m w nes ren ara gen. Tried naruto takoyaki at little tokyo, went to daitokyo (i didnt eat anything), and got matcha cake, sakura and mango raspberry gelato at kebun ide. Picked up by mom. Renata gifted me bts 2021 winter package photocard 🥺🥺

22 - iluni internship webinar by dr naldo. Grabbed fried chicken master. Stupid time management etcetc made my start makeup at 12 (febby went out at 13:30). My falsies and hijabdo was done by herrr thank god for the help. Went to swissbel. Didnt take a pic w almira bcs time. Almiras wedding at damai indah golf pik. My skin was TERRIBLE at the wedding. The make up didnt stick prolly bcs of vitacid. Thank god for masks,,, went back home w febbyy. Made tiktok lmao

23 - lazed. Went to flavola. Its finally daytime caffeine again w kopsuscok. Did dr triya's translation work and finished it at home. She transferred the fee at like 11pm

24 - off to RSF with mom. no new medical records. wrote fuad’s name on the medrec borrowing form. continued to nisa’s place w mom. lazed, played w haekal, put some patient’s phone number on the inaco excel. Off to GBK with nisa and sarah. parked at abc field (shouldve parked near GBK’s H gate). saw moja museum 2.0, took lots of pics. mo paint (moral lesson: draw the background first!! not the foreground). finished at 16:30. ashar at masjid al-bina. nisa dropped me off at gbk tj station. prayed maghrib on the bus since the traffic was so ughh. met atikah in lippo puri. decided to eat seirockya so we walked to puri. talked about a certain someone along the way. we rly talked about it while walking until we arrived at seirockya. atikah treated me uyeyy since she and racheel will stay in depok for 2 weeks starting tomorrow. got the shoyu ramen and gyoza. took the taxi to atikah’s place. mom’s waiting there lmaoo i was like “noo dont wait at jco, just wait at atikah’s”. still felt energized that night in my bed. no sleepy2. like 100% awake. 

25 - woke up at like 9:30. i basically did nothing today. didnt even shower lmao (i showered last night). read the good teacher in one go. zoom meeting w dr eva. i rly need some structure in life, goshhh

26 - showered and went to mcd. got nasi uduk, breakfast wrap and milo for 26k (thanks mcd app promo and mcd duta garden’s menu machine, i dont have to interact with another human). planning to do dr dafsah’s excel after all the data is complete, and still no new inaco data, so i ended up.... online shopping at bobobobo....... (bought outer and white culotte). tidied up the writings on my stickies (plenty of words has accumulated). ordered onejai for emir juan (expensive!!! 79k no promo lolll but free delivery. i was baited by gojek’s 1k 2 week subscription and felt like hmmm i should get something since we live in the middle of nowhere and free deliveries felt significant at that particular time when im holding my phone lmao). fell asleep after drinking vsoy + matcha lol its soft caffeine no longer works i guess

27 - woke up late as usual, went to sbux at 1 pm. tried white peach matcha frapp. the peach overpowers and u can barely taste the matcha. tried to read something useful (in medicine) but skimmed 2 ppt and then i saw solid’s bitly for isip. finished reading banana fish. couldnt bawl my eyes out because im outside.

28 - checked out rsf. Still no new ones. Immediately went back. Lazed and wasted my time

29 - iluni webinar. Here comes the impending life crisis. Ate nasi uduk and mie goreng telor today. Tried vsoy golden grain with matcha. It has almond aftertaste. Line call with kris for almost 4 hrs until 11 past sumn pm.

30 - more iluni webinar. Dr Eric, SpPD, PhD was rly cool. Tried daily box (butter soy chicken). Quite tasty. Mkg w regen. Videocalled in the mall w silvi racil bcs its ale and nadaa's wedding today. Bought gooma 500ml matcha w gofood pickup discount. Ate sushi go (the shoyu has mirin btw). 50k+ you get 6 piece of sushi (2 salmon) and matcha cake and ocha. Quite a nice deal. Talked abt cryptocurrency lmao. Went back and forth w TJ. All hail tj

31 - planned to do at least some productive stuff at home. turns out nila is outside and had some time to spare. so we went out. i met her in citra 6. we went to pik’s white beach. its scorching hot since its 2 pm. spent like 15 mins there. we had wanted to stop by monsieur spoon but THERES A QUEUEEE even if its a hot afternoon. so we ate tom sushi at green sedayu. talked a bit afterwards in nila’s place and then i was picked up by emir. tried gooma’s matcha. its not sweet like sbux. approved by mom (who doesnt like sweets). but its more expensive than sbux’s 2L 100k promo lol. (45k after gopay pickup promo for 500 ml). reread bj alex lmaooooo found new tidbits