#so it's hard to find the exact balance between him being prickly and angry

[waitineedaname]

She would’ve expected the softness to have been beaten out of him by everything that had happened. She knew it would have been beaten out of her, if she were in his shoes. In some ways, he had hardened up. He was harsher, colder, more pragmatic. It fit him, made him seem more mature as a sect leader. And yet, by some strange miracle, she was allowed to see beyond the facade of Jiang Wanyin, sect leader. Hidden beneath those hard layers was a boy that still cared with such an intensity it would someday tear him apart.  For reasons she could not fathom, he shed that shell around her, and trusted her with the soft interior. She did not feel like she should be trusted with this vulnerable core of his person, but to explain why would be to change everything, so she took the vulnerability he handed her and did her best not to shake.

I've finally finished the Golden Core reveal part of my chengqing fake marriage au! this fic ended up way longer than I planned because I enjoyed writing Wen Qing's POV too much. oops.

[izupie]

Sleep Is Overrated Anyway

Summary:  Keith can't sleep - between the Lion swapping, Lotor problem and Shiro coming back, there's just too much going on in his head to relax. On top of all that, the Castle of Lions won't stop this incessant humming.... He only wanted to go and train for a bit and blow off some steam, but he bumps into a certain someone who can't seem to sleep either. Who needs sleep when you can awkwardly flirt in the middle of the night?

Word Count: 3,602

Genre: Klance Fluff  (So much fluff) (And lots of awkward flirting)

AO3 Link: [xxXXxx]

The Castle of Lions hummed at night. It was a stupid thing to suddenly fixate on, but lying there not being able to sleep made it more noticeable, and now it was all Keith could think about. He supposed it hummed all through the day too, but there was always something going on in the ship that drowned it out; Pidge tapping away on keyboards, Hunk working hard in the kitchen, Shiro and Allura discussing the recent Lotor problem, Coran reminiscing loudly and Lance chatting or singing songs while he kept everyone company. There was a certain energy to the team that made the ship feel smaller than it really was - more lived in. It never felt like they were rattling around inside, even though there were only seven of them (plus the space mice). But at night....

At night, there was just stillness and silence.

And the humming.

Keith already knew the low hum wasn’t caused by engines, since the ship was powered by crystals and energy, but the familiar sound did remind him of his brief time in the Garrison. It always managed to stir up old feelings of discord and unrest from that time too; back when he didn’t believe he belonged anywhere and was angry at the world.

He rolled onto his back and stared at the ceiling through the darkness, though admittedly it was never actually pitch black in the castle, since so much of it was covered in panels designed to glow softly all the time, and Keith had excellent night vision anyway. But it was still dark and he was alone. He clenched his hands in the thin blanket covering him.

At night, the castle felt... empty.

It felt like it had been a few hours since they’d all gone to their rooms, though Keith had no way of measuring the exact time, and sleep had eluded him so far. There were so many things rattling through his brain that he just couldn’t switch it off and relax. Mostly he was anxious about their continuing fight against the Galra (Lotor in particular troubled him), his unhappy Garrison memories didn’t seem to be able to leave him alone tonight, and the ever-present stress of being the Team Leader now, over Shiro apparently, since the Black Lion was still claiming him as its Paladin, continued to lie thickly in his mind. And then there was Lance. Keith sat up suddenly and the blanket slid off his bare torso. Fuck. He had promised himself to stop thinking about Lance.

Ever since he’d made that video log he had been having trouble with his emotions, and become even more aware of his teammate than usual. Which mostly just annoyed him, because it was stupid things like whether Lance looked happy, if he was smiling, and was he ok? And then all Keith wanted to do was make him smile, make him happy, and know he was going to be ok. He hadn’t even mentioned Lance in his vlog, but he’d dragged up some issues he’d been really repressing for some time, and apparently that list included how he felt about Lance. He tried so hard not to openly flirt with him, because Keith really didn’t want anyone to catch on - especially Lance himself - but... he just couldn’t help himself half the time. He’d find himself standing next to Lance on the ship’s bridge, maybe just a little bit too close, sitting next to him at meal times or seeking him out if he had some free time. He usually didn’t even realise when their casual banter and good-natured bickering had crossed the line into flirting until he would catch himself laughing too much, with too much affection, and his chest was tight with this warm and fluttery feeling that only Lance could cause. And then he’d just get confused because, yes, maybe he’d ended up flirting, but was Lance also flirting back...?

Maybe it had been because he’d opened the window on this whole secret part of his heart, and now he couldn’t shut it back down?

Ugh. Keith rubbed his tired eyes with his knuckles. What a dumb metaphor. He definitely needed some sleep.

Deciding that a distraction and wearing himself out was his best option, Keith flung back the blanket and rose out of bed, pulling on his favourite black shirt and pants over his sleeping shorts. The ship was kept at a constant, pleasant temperature so he had no need for his jacket, but he slipped on his belt and secured his Galra knife into its compartment at the back - after the ship itself had tried to kill him once he never left his room unarmed.

The training bay wasn’t far from the rooms where they all slept, and he had been that way many times before, so he strode confidently through the shadowed corridors; softly lit by the many blue panels built into the walls and floor, which only made his night vision even better. Keith felt himself becoming more alert as he walked, looking forward to a good spar with one of the training robots. But the clunking of his boots stopped abruptly when he rounded the next corridor and saw light spilling out from the open training bay door. He narrowed his eyes and began to move forward again cautiously. As he got closer he could hear sounds of metal clashing and grunts of effort from someone inside.

That sounded like....

“-ink you’re so tough huh?” Lance taunted. “Hah!” There was a sound of clashing metal. “Agh! Would you stop quiznaking blocking!”

Keith had crept soundlessly to the doorway, and peered curiously into the huge training bay. Lance was also in his casual clothes, with the sleeves of his top rolled up and minus his jacket, though Keith could see the jacket lying discarded by the wall as if he’d flung it there. He had one of the sparring swords gripped tightly in both hands that he was pressing futilely against the one-handed sword grip of the training robot, teeth clenched in a grimace of effort. Even from a distance it was easy to see that all his weight was wrongly distributed; he was putting all his effort into pushing the sword down on a perfectly executed block, with a stance that left him wide open to a counter-attack. Keith was about to shout out and say as much when the robot surged its arm upwards, throwing Lance completely off balance and sending his sword spinning out of his grip, then crouched down to swipe his legs completely from under him. Keith winced as his friend came crashing to the floor and the training bot had its sword tip pointed directly at his throat.

Keith knew that no harm would have come to him, since the robots were programmed to spar only, but it still passed an angry shiver through his body to see Lance in that kind of situation.

“End training.” He snapped, his voice carrying loudly through the cavernous room. The robot’s arms went limp and it ceased function immediately at Keith’s command.

“Keith - ?!” Lance sputtered, as Keith pushed past the frozen robot and extended a hand down to him. He took the hand without hesitation and Keith pulled him to his feet, trying to ignore the soft, warm feel of Lance’s hands and the ridiculous buzz it pulsed up his arm at his touch.

Distantly he realised that if he’d have extended an arm out to Lance back when they’d first met, there was no way he’d have taken it, and he’d have thrown in a childish retort at the same time. Instead Keith noticed that they were still holding hands and let go quickly.

Lance cleared his throat and dusted himself off. “Thanks man. I, uh, guess I need some more training before I go against those really high level training simulations. Caught me off guard there.” He said while he stretched his arms above his head.

“Kinda looked like the Level 1 bot to me.” Keith smirked.

Lance brought his arms back down sharply. “What - no way - your mullet must be getting in your eyes.” He waved a dismissive hand, then paused. “Wait, don’t they all look the same?”

“Yeah, but they have different attack patterns. At level 1 it’s all about trying to break through your opponent’s defence - keeping a good stance, moving fast and knowing when to strike,” the enthusiasm in his voice was making Keith speak a little faster than normal, and he trailed off into silence when he became aware of it, “and then at level 2 it really gets....” He folded his arms. “Doesn’t matter.”

Keith looked away, but didn’t miss the shadow of hurt that flickered across Lance’s face as he clammed up again.

The training room was a good outlet for the times his temper would flare up, or when things just got too much - so he’d spent a long time using the different training levels. More time than he’d ever admitted to the rest of the team. Not that it should matter, but he wanted it to seem like he had more of a handle on his emotions than he really did, especially now they were counting on him to lead them. It wasn’t even really like he thought Lance would be nasty about it either - a bit of playful teasing perhaps - but he had gotten so used to hiding his feelings that it made him extra prickly about how easy it was to let down all those ridiculous walls he’d built up inside when he was around Lance. When they came down he’d sometimes throw them right back up again without thinking.

Lance must have read some of the inner conflict on his face, because when he looked back he shrugged and the easy-going grin returned, calming Keith down and relaxing that tight knot in his chest. Lance’s voice was light, but his ocean blue eyes were sincere, “Hey, no need to get defensive Hot-Head. I already know you need to get out more, so it’s not like you can shock me with your creepy intense knowledge of the training robots.”

Which oddly echoed what Keith had been thinking. He knew deep down that it was something Lance wouldn’t care about - he’d seen the unwavering loyalty and compassion hidden under his usual snark and cheer. Keith narrowed his eyes, but it held none of the temper that had flared to the surface before, despite being called both ‘defensive’ and ‘Hot-Head’. Lance had a strange, unique, terrifying and wonderful effect on him. “Seriously? You see someone get touchy about a subject and you bring it right up? And call them names?”

“It’s how I roll.” Lance winked.

Keith swallowed hard. “Actually, I think this is all just to keep me from mentioning how badly you got your ass handed to you by the Level 1 training robot.”

Lance clutched his hands to his chest as if wounded and groaned. “Um, ow. Now who’s bringing up touchy subjects?”

“At least I didn’t call you names.” Keith countered with a light chuckle, not even realising he’d moved, but somehow found himself much closer to Lance than when they’d begun talking. He was close enough to smell sweat and the lemongrass shampoo he always used.

“Oh yeah? And what would you call me?”

If Lance had noticed him come closer he didn’t make any indication of it, or attempt to move away.

Was this - ? Were they - ?

“I’d probably just call you an idiot.” Keith wasn’t even sure what he was saying anymore, since so much of his brain was taken up with this just ... awareness of Lance. Being so close.

So close.

Too close.

They were -

“’Cause that’s real mature.” Lance scoffed, but his voice came out much breathier than normal. Keith felt it on the bridge of his nose.

But then he began to snigger, and he couldn’t stop the laughter that bubbled out of him. It was completely and utterly ridiculous to laugh at a time like that, but that reply was just so Lance. It did unfortunately dispel whatever had been... happening between them, and he took a half step backwards as the intensity surrounding them died with his laughter. He really couldn’t help it. It bloomed this deep, almost achingly strong affection in the pit of his stomach and he couldn’t contain it.

It was the lightest, most precious feeling he’d ever had.

“You’re the idiot!” Lance’s voice cracked and he looked away rapidly. “It would take one to know one!” He folded his arms.

Keith’s laughter faded and he wiped his eyes. Lance was still looking away, but his ears were red anyway. Keith smiled, “True,” he agreed softly.

A glint of light bouncing off the sword, still on the floor nearby, brought his attention back to why he’d even come into the training bay in the first place before he got... distracted. “What were you training with a sword for anyway Lance? Your bayard is a gun. You don’t even use swords?”

Good. That was good. A switch back to a more neutral topic was what he needed, since his brain and body were still very much preoccupied with their ‘moment’ that his outburst of joy had spectacularly disrupted.

It was an innocent enough question, but if anything, it made Lance even more flustered. The tips of his ears were scarlet from what Keith could see through his dark mop of hair. Silence hung in the air. Keith was about to say something more when Lance said in a small voice, “I do when we’ve formed Voltron.”

“What...?”

Lance sighed. “When we’re Voltron I’m in the Red Lion now, and that makes me the Right Arm. I produce and control the sword.” He looked up at the ceiling. “And I don’t know the first thing about fighting with swords.” He smiled, still obviously not-looking-at-Keith. “As you could see.”

“Lance -” Keith began.

“I know it sounds kind of dumb, but I don’t want to be the one that lets everybody down because I can’t fight properly. I mean... I’ll never be as good at it as you were.... But I... I’m trying to get better.” There was another pause and Keith didn’t quite know what to say to that, so Lance continued quietly, “Allura told me that I was your Right Hand Man - so I want you to be able to count on me.”

Keith punched Lance in the shoulder, but it didn’t have any real force behind it, which finally brought surprised blue eyes back down to meet his own. “You really are an idiot.” Keith ground out with a frown, his eyebrows drawn together.

“Wha- Hey - !” Lance rubbed at his shoulder.

“I always count on you, and there’s no way you could let me down.” Keith’s expression softened and he reached out a gentler hand to place on his shoulder, in a comforting gesture they were both familiar with, but the motion was much smaller and he ended up placing his hand on Lance’s bare arm, just below where he’d pushed his sleeves up to. Not even really thinking about what he was doing Keith let his hand trail slowly over soft, tan skin, feeling goose bumps under his fingertips, and he pressed his hand into Lance’s. He’d also apparently taken another step closer whilst doing this, because he was well aware of their proximity again.

Lance’s hand was warm, maybe even a little sweaty, but they just... fit.

What was he doing??

Keith tried to pull sharply away; all his emotional walls being thrown up in a panic at his impulsive gesture, but he was stopped by Lance tightly entwining their fingers together. He looked up in surprise to see a smile so wide he was practically grinning. Keith stopped his struggle.

“Are you...?” Keith began, wanting to make sure - wanting to make absolutely sure - that he hadn’t just completely misjudged everything between them, and that his stupid impulsiveness hadn’t just ruined their friendship. He knew they were only holding hands, but it was the way he’d done it that made it a gesture that meant something more. But then it was Lance who had laced their fingers together wasn’t it?

“Are you?” Lance echoed, raising his eyebrows. Which Keith took to mean exactly what he’d been trying to say - ‘Are you okay with this?’

“Uh, yeah, of course.” He managed through the haze of is-this-really-happening, suddenly finding it very difficult to look at Lance. “I made the first move didn’t I.”

At the sound of angry sputtering Keith whipped back around to see that the smug grin was gone from Lance’s face, and the redness from his ears had also bloomed across his nose.

“You made the first move!? Dude, I’ve been flirting with you, like, really hard, for weeks!” His voice rose rapidly in pitch.

Keith looked incredulous and pointed at Lance, almost accusingly, with his free hand. “You’re kidding-! I’ve been the one flirting with you for weeks!”

“Nuh-uh. Nope. I am not having that.” Lance shook his head while he reached out and grasped the hand that was pointing at him, pulling it down between them and lacing those fingers together too, so they stood facing each other, both hands entwined firmly. “I wasn’t sure if the flirting was working, y’know? So I was going to ramp it up and really put on the ‘Lance charm’. But...” He shrugged, “my best move is the old yawn-arm-stretch while watching a movie. And there is a severe lack of movies in space.”

Keith huffed out an amused breath, and he could feel his smile crinkling the corners of his eyes. He had it bad for this idiot. He had it very bad.

“So if you think about it,” Lance continued, “I was really the one that made the first move. Because I would have done. If I could.”

“Except that you didn’t?” Keith corrected through his smile, tilting his head slightly.

Lance squeezed their hands, pouted, and shrugged again. “Technicalities.” He said breezily, his blue eyes bright.

Considering Keith had started the night not being able to sleep, and only went to the training room to blow off some steam, everything had taken an unexpected turn. A welcome and happy turn, to be sure, but he just... would never have expected this. Ever. His emotional distance was an unfortunate side effect of a life spent mostly alone, and he just wouldn’t have believed that someone had the tenacity and ability to bridge that distance. And that he could do it, again and again and again. It surprised him that he had been so wrapped up in the thoughts of how he shouldn’t be flirting or acting upon his feelings for Lance, that he had missed them being returned.

“I thought,” Lance said, with a playful smile, “I thought, ‘Keith is like a baby deer-’”

“-How am I like a baby deer?”

He lowered his voice to a whisper, “‘-Can’t come on too strongly or you’ll spook him.’”

Keith yanked his hands out of Lance’s grip before he could notice and tighten them again, and for a heartbeat he looked hurt, probably thinking he’d finally offended him and gone one step too far. But Keith took a few paces away, picked up the sword laying nearby and swung it experimentally.

“Whoa, hey Keith, I was only joking.” Lance held up his hands in alarm, backing a few paces away.

Keith chuckled and flipped the sword around, partly from practice and partly just to show off, then held out the handle for Lance to take; he looked intrigued, was about to say something, then shut his mouth again, and eventually just took the blade. Keith moved behind him and crouched down to pull his feet into a wide stance, to keep his centre of gravity balanced, then stood back up and pressed his front to Lance’s back - so he could arrange his arms into a good starting position for a sword fight, using his hands to hold onto Lance’s wrists.

“Uh-” Lance began, the sound coming out as nearly a squeak.

Keith had pushed and pulled Lance into position, but kept his legs, front, and arms pressed firmly against him, still gripping his wrists, so he could almost use him like a puppet from behind. Lance was warm. And this close the lemongrass smell was a lot stronger; it was a smell that suited him. It was easy to see and feel the height difference between them when they were like this, even though it wasn’t by too much, so Keith’s nose was just above Lance’s hairline. He lowered his lips slightly to the middle of Lance’s neck, and felt the gallop of his heartbeat speed up. He wondered if Lance could feel it through the thin layer of clothes that separated their skin.

He wanted them to be close. He wanted them to stay close. The feelings in his heart, deep in his soul, were loud and clear. Keith knew he still had some emotional issues to work through, but none of that seemed to phase Lance. And he figured it would be a better journey made with some company. Especially if that company was the one person in the world he couldn’t imagine living apart from.

He was glad he’d made that video log.

He was glad he couldn’t sleep.

“Now we’ll see who the baby deer is.” Keith whispered into Lance’s neck, his breath stirring the tiny hairs there. He could feel Lance shiver.

“Begin training!”

He was glad the castle hummed.