#so im feeling v emotional about how the show trashed it so hard

[azoraahai]

i am,,, once again,,, upset over how d&d ruined so many of the characters in GoT like it’s actually atrocious

[sanchoyo]

danny phantom, season 3 episodes 3-6 thoughts!

see prev episode thoughts in this tag <3

-johnny was actually pretty civil with danny and left when he asked! thats nice. also, SKULKER?? HAD A FRAMED PICTURE OF EMBER?? oooo fuck wait had they established they were a Thing Before?? I dont think so. thats weird. its like that country boy/goth girl meme lmfao. I think i am going to choose to ignore this new info and pretend I didnt hear it. 100% unrelated to the jazz/ember fanart I already drew and posted....😳

-LADIES NIGHT EPISODE THIS IS WHAT ITS ALL ABOUT. wish it didnt really center around the guys or them being pissed at them, but. willing to bet this was written by men lol

-THEY ERASED ALL THE MEN??? meanwhile, jack and danny are fishing at. silent hill or something. im glad jack is trying to read a parenting book and making an Attempt. (theyre at lake erie, but, they made it actually eerie...thats fun)

-the girls alt outfits...cute. EMBER MADE A NEW SONG TOO!!! kinda. jazz being one of the backup singers and being AWFUL. NOOOO

-'how are we going to get kitty to blow a kiss?' 'she'll have to think there are still some males in town!' ...i dont know how to break it to you, but I dont know that a 100% het girl would wish for all men to Begone. I think. I mean im not a het or a girl so I dont really know for sure. she Is probably Bi tho. esp having the other ladies in town chanting NO MEN!!! excitedly............(then again, the kiss is to get Rid of men, so, she probably would have blown it at the ladies only if they were actively trying to attack/stop them, so...I MEAN. THE DRESSING LIKE DANNY BIT WAS SO EXTRA)

-I feel like an all female cast ep couldve been way way way way cooler than that was. like. why was it still somehow all about Men. ...anyway. (where was valerie...)

-next ep opens with the observants, and, way way more of them than I expected...existed? I mean I guess them being a council/jury of some kind is what I expected from their first appearance (bc at that time they were basically TELLING clockwork to kill danny, not asking,, so I figured they had SOME kind of authority) but. there were so many. anyway, here goes vlad! letting his own hubris go brrrr. releasing a weather ghost for political gain! #justvladthings

-okay say what you will about him (he IS an asshole) but having an umbrella with his own face on it and more prepared to share is SUPER FUNNY. and him being fanned by huge wads of money by his bodyguards. SO ineffective but so Dramatic. He UNDERSTANDS that if youre rich you need to be. you know. obnoxious and kinda eccentric about it! fuckign hate when rich people are boring about it. I would trust vlad with nothing except to not be a boring rich asshole who wears...fucking khaki or some shit. man knows his Presentation Skills. and that 'V' chair in his mayoral office. is that fucking embroidered?

-maddie get your MAN PLEEEEASSSE. IM SO EMBARRASSED FOR HER. the way jack stays simping for this man. in FRONT OF HIS WIFE!!!! ...my god its like a love triangle. jack clearly loves vlad, who loves maddie, who loves jack. jack fenton is at the very least bi, right................. this is an OBSESSION . 'THE V MAN COMETH'???? i...my god. (also, on a serious note, to have a friend THIS SUPPORTIVE...and still be SUCH A DICK TO HIM (TRYING TO KILL HIM AND STEAL HIS WIFE??) NOT COOL VLAD. JACK IS YOUR 1 AND /ONLY/ HYPE MAN. if someone loved and supported me THIS HARD...LIKE. CMON DUDE.

-STOMP the fucking GAS, JACK

-this would make a great shirt design, looks like a metal band design! we love The Maelstrom

-oh, so vlad did in fact get a mansion in amity park. and its purple! good color choice! not as flashy as a CASTLE or MURDER CABIN, but still pretty eccentric, which I appreciate.

-...vlad knows the difference between picasso and da vinci? in the ep last post where we were watching him fail at conquering every historical time ever he didnt seem to know history well enough to like. be effective...was vlad taking art history at college?? (was he an art MAJOR??? we never DID KNOW WHAT HE WENT TO SCHOOL FOR. I kinda assumed business because in the masters of time ep he was still rich without ghost powers so he had to have..known something about business or something, right...but also, art and or theater FITS HIS PERSONALITY. possibly also something science-y, I guess, but I always felt like he got roped into that, esp how pessimistic he was about the ghost portal in the flashbacks to college, like, i felt like he was just there for maddie and was uninterested/un-invested at the time...)

-THIS GHOST JUST ELECTROCUTED MADDIE (THE CAT) BITCH!! THATS MY FAVORITE MADDIE!!! vlad going after vortex and being ~shocked~ .....WHEN. WHEN WILL YOU LEARN. THAT YOUR ACTIONS. HAVE CONSEQUENCES!!!

-the way this random man with a camera sees the mayor laying in an alley covered in TRASH AND DECIDES TO TAKE A PICTURE HAHAH

*snap* this ones going in my cringe compilation!

-vlad 'if we're going to defeat vortex, we're going to have to do it together!' *immediately dips after dropping danny off in front of vortex* JKASDFHKJHJKN

-DANNY CAN DUPLICATE!!! ...he couldnt even attack with it, but he DID IT!!! INTO (4) OF HIMSELF!!! SO PROUD!!!!!!!!!!

-'THE ROLLER COASTER EMOTIONS OF A TEENAGER THREATEN MY PLANS!' ...0 self awareness of his own dramatic moodiness. incredible, how dumb this man is. its very close to circling around to endearing, if he was less of an asshole. at least its very very funny to see danny shooting him with tiny lightning bolts anytime he's even slightly irritated! vlad you should be nice to danny anyway. this is what you GET

-...making sandwiches and ice cream and playing video games with your nephew is a totally normal thing. WHY is vlad acting like this is the end of the world. if you were a GOOD UNCLE YOU WOULD ALREADY BE DOING THESE THINGS!!! bitch I make my nephew food all the time and dont forget what he does and doesnt like. if u didnt know danny didnt want tomatoes, thats on u. if u, a grown adult, are gonna piss of the 14 yr old by not letting him win, u deserve to have to pay for the arcade machines he ruins because he now has uncontrollable storm powers because YOU THREW HIM INTO A FIGHT WITH THE STORM GHOST. fuck u vlad. paypal me $400,000 while ur at it tho. (also, gamer vlad confirmed)

-VLAD CAN COOK THOUGH???! I assumed he had...people working for him that did that. I mean. billionaires usually dont do that. then again, we've only seen those vultures working for him (and I guess the dairy king was AT his old mansion, but it was never really clarified if he worked there...I think he probably just Hung Out and they Enjoyed Cheeses Together. thats what I think, I dont think a KING would be working for anyone and also the dairy king was nice <3) but then again he would be a private person and we cant have anyone accidentally finding Ghostly Things, so...still, that's hilarious. pour one out for that really cute banana split that got ruined 2 seconds later

-vlad just fucking picking danny up and THROWING HIM AT VORTEX TWICE WITHIN LIKE A MINUTE. JUST ABSOLUTELY LAUNCHING HIM. BITCH THATS MY SON BE CAREFUL!!! HES GOT ORGANS AND THINGS!!!!

-danny seeing those animal commercials and feeling sad is the biggest 2000s throwback so far. i legitimately had to change the channel or walk out of the room when those came on bc id CRY AND BE SAD ABOUT THEM FOR DAYS AFTER. fuck those commercials and fuck that IN THE ARMMMS OF AN ANGELLLL song 😭

-'vlads ego almost got the town destroyed!' yes danny thats the entire episode. the entire series anytime vlad shows up honestly. this episode was just him being really embarrassing the entire time, and, me laughing about it. 10/10 would laugh at him again

-NEXT EP WE HAVE A SHAPESHIFTING GHOST?? I've said it before but shapeshifting is the power I would want when asked those 'what superpower do you want' questions...its the Best power! this guy looks like a homestuck character. ive never read homestuck but thats the vibe

-I love every time we see tuckers family, they are by far the most functional family. and dash has a lil chihuahua!!! named pookie!!! i am crying (I've had 3 chihuahuas, so I am very biased, but...) AND HE WATCHES THE ROMANCE CHANNEL WITH POOKIE. POOKIE I WILL DIE FOR YOU YOU SWEET LITTLE BABY.

-danny can lift a bus! I shouldn't be surprised, but i am proud of my son. hes got lil kid fans. i am going to cry about this

-JAZZ KEEPS A SCRAPBOOK WITH DANNY'S LIL HEROICS AND NEWSPAPER CLIPPINGS!!! we've actually seen it on her floor before, but I didnt realize it was a scrapbook!! thats sooo cute.

-...and danny has to stand there listening to his parents saying danny phantom sucks and is a 'filthy ghost' and calling him egotistical...i am once again stealing their kids!

-THIS GHOST RIPPING JAZZ'S SCRAPBOOK!!! ILL KILL YOU. SHE WORKED HARD ON THAT!!! BITCH

-yes, maddie, the one with red eyes is For Sure Actually Your Son. ignore the, red eyes... (CLEARLY she hasnt watched the other 2 eps where danny has been evil, she doesnt know red eyes= evil!!!)

-'billy fenton'.......................

-danny being stuck as phantom in his own house, no way out is a fucking NIGHTMARE. his parents pointing giant weapons against him and SHOOTING AT HIM. THIS IS A HORROR MOVIE.

-NINE INCH NAILS POSTER.

-this is the most screenshot of all time

-amorpho turning into mr. lancer because hes 'someone no one will want to be around' BUT HES WRONG, I WOULD BEFRIEND AND HANG OUT WITH MR LANCER SO FAST.

-tucker dressing as danny, now I have the full Tucker set of him being sam and also being danny. also saying 'the ghost...uh...RIPPED MY FACE OFF.' and then running. SMOOTH. NOT AT ALL CONCERNING TO ANY PARENTS.

-sam accepts the toast from jack. and then 2 seconds later is like 'why am i eating this.' THIS SHOWS HUMOR IS SO UNEXPECTED SOMETIMES ITS REALLY GOOD. and then the scene after, mr lancer running into his ghost doppelganger and being like 'YOURE GORGOUS' THEN FAINTING. I AM CRYING. AND DASH FAINTING TOO.

-sam disguising herself as danny again to help tucker run from the fentons. but leaving him shirtless in the streets. incredible. 'plEASE DOnt NOTice MY FACELessNESS I MUST LIVE IN EXILE' this episode is destroying me the humor in this show is exactly my brand of corny and cheesy

-the impromtu story made up by danny and amorpho to explain stuff to the fentons. my god they are both such bad liars. but amorpho is a good egg. wish danny wouldnt have said he didnt wanna see him in town again!! I want him to be reoccurring. not that thats gonna matter since I'm almost done with the series, but the idea of this being the Only Time We See him is :(

-NEXT EP SAYS STARRING MARK HAMILL??????!!! hello ! mr . joker....mr. star wars.... I feel like I should be. idk. taking off a hat im not wearing in respect. I shouldnt be surprised tho bc hes in a lot of cartoons as a very good voice actor, and dp has already had a lot of talented ones so I've been looking out for ones I might know, but....mr. hamill....

-sam has her own greenhouse, names all the plants, and says thank you to them (in the languages from where the plants are from) whenever she harvests from them. thats SO cute. and her lil gothy lunch box...

-and danny's lil red fuzzy lined jacket!!! ive said it before but every time the characters get alt outfits im like :D

-danny has ice powers now!!! THATS WHAT FROSTBITE MEANT. HE KNEW SOMEHOW WAY BACK THEN

-THIS SHOW NEVER LETS YOU FORGET VLAD IS A BILLIONAIRE, HUH.

-danny's lil 'holy hibiscus!' first off the 50s batman swearing is hilarious. 2nd. my username is from the flower sanchoyo hibiscus, so, shoutout to ME this ep. hi :)

-EURGH UNDERGROWTH MAKING EVERYONE PLANT ZOMBIES. HIVEMIND PLOTS SCARE THE SHIT OUT OF ME. and this dude made the city SO overtaken so quickly like how long was danny asleep?? oh god

-evil fucked up sam! now the whole trio has gone evil at some point! the voice actress did a really, really good job with making her sound like a zombie...

-frostbite's paws are so so so big compared to danny. oh my god. i want to hug the snow dog...

-the far frozen has an advanced medical stuff!!! very cool. very smart snow dogs

-im so glad danny has a friendly ghost snow dad to explain this new power and teach him!!! this is so sweet. DANNY'S GHOST SENSE WAS A PART OF HIS ICE POWER?? OOOH. COOL. we love a training montage!!!

-danny saying if he cant defeat overgrowth, that he'd want to stay with frostbite...oh my god...do you think this is the first real supportive adult figure in his life (I am NOT counting his parents because they threaten him on the daily even if they dont realize it.) I mean mr lancer is a Teacher, but he was also nice but this is different, but this is a GHOST WHO IS WILLING TO HELP HIM with his powers and also will help him when hes injured and is so so nice and comparatively so much more mature than 90% of the adults in this show!!!! god. dad frostbite is my everything.

-the framing and lighting this episode, and all the angles...they went all OUT and it looks really really good. this is my nightmare scenario, tho. like, FUCK zombies and dead city zones and hivemind shit. and using the humans as 'nutrients for the children' i am going to THROW UP.

-MALEFICENT VIBES WITH THE HORNS AND GREEN EYES! this costume kicks so much ass. sam is now mark hamills daughter, I guess.

-danny's ice powers making his eyes blue!!! thats neat. and him going for the roots underground was SO SMART. i will not stand for danny ever thinking hes stupid, hes SO smart.

almost done with the show... :"( thats a sad thought!!!

[icecreamkink]

so i watched cobra kai all in two days and i have so many -

this show has so many cool and smart angles to it, but the same time.... its so stupid oh my god everyone is so dumb literally mr miyagi held all of the braincells in this whole universe 

like i am but at the same time i am not surprised it was made like this, bc in hindsight of course there were hordes of ppl simping over johnny lawrence ....  but it still amuses me that this is like... an Actual Official Thing

ok this will get long so cut it is

how much fun this cast has is super visible and i love it

i rly enjoy how the world was expanded ! i did grow up watching the karate kid movies, so watching how they progressed the world of the movies so organically was pretty cool. it rly feels like its the same universe

i fucking LOVE stories that are largely about a Thing. dancing ,skating, sports its just so thrilling to experience this all consuming relationship people can have with this type of activity? and martial arts are just that much more intense, so yeah, grown ass men kicking each other around at the lightest provocation and a war veteran caring so much abt teen karate is Ridiculous.... but i love it all because thats the intensity i find so thrilling

was kinda surprised with how much im missing mr. miyagi. first because, like everyone is so unhinged jesus christo, it just really throws into relief how much his character grounded the narrative of the movies. but also hes just a really great character

and on that note it rly Gets Me that the show itself aknowledges that and plays that into daniels angst and all the little ways they sorta weave myiagisms into the whole show........ im not getting emotional over this dumb karate dads show OK

related - i really miss hearing ‘daniel-san’ 🥺🥺

ACE DEGENERATE oh god oh no

they really went down the down and out johnny lawrence route huh. like i was always kinda bummed we see kreese choking him and then we never see him again in the movies, and while i love dumpster fire problematic trash himbo ck johnny, its like......................... actually really sad that his life turned out like this fjngn

everytime i hear ‘babes’ and ‘pussy’ i die a little inside. i know thats the point but i am a v cringe easy person, have mercy (ehe)

loved the way they are constantly drawing parallels between johnny and mr. myiagi of all people. hes the handy man of his building that has a bullied kid asking for help and eventually steps up to teach them karate, beats up a bunch of bullies for him, creates a friendship with said kid, estranged from family, drinks his sorrows away, surprisingly one of the least quick to anger characters (which says more about everyone else really but.... Well.), no schemes or ulterior motives hes just tryna vibe here.... oh and ofc magically heals miguel of is asthma apparently. the true disciple.. meanwhile daniel is his usual messy petty self even tho he wants to be mr myiagi so bad 

also interesting about that is how miguels character is a parallel of both johnny and daniel at the same time

overall the parallels in ck are done really well, drawing comparisons and also subverting them constantly. theyre well thought out

THE PARALELOGRAMS

fr tho, the angle being explicitly the cycle of trauma and its effects and how trumatized adults in turn traumatize kids, maliciously or not, is so interesting

but! on the flip side of that, it feels like the writers are getting in their own way @ letting the characters grow. especially this last season. theres only so many times you can do "johnny and daniel are getting along but 5mins later they are (literally) fighting over some dumbass random issue" or "johnny puts in 20% of effort with robby and then gives up" before it gets on your nerves yknow?

i see daniel no longer talks like macchio ingested 15 shots of espresso before every take and idk how to feel about that tbh

interesting tension in daniel, as in, in tkk mr miyagi was there and daniel was frankly, kind of a lil shit, this messy petty spitfire hot tempered sassy kid,(johnny lawrence voice: just... stop being so annoying) but now hes the adult, and he wants to be mr. miyagi... but hes just not, and never will be to his very core and it shakes him and in a way hes trying to find who he is now that he sees himself in a position to be a not! cobra kai figure. i kinda really like that 

plus how that relates to his cobra kai trauma. idk if the writers thought abt it Like That, i think so, but in any case, its interesting bc it seems like daniel has told everyone whod listen about johnny lawrence his Pretty Boy Karate Rival and high school and 84 cobra kai... But. no one seems to know what went on in 85 (or 86? idk) which was just so much worse

like ye og cobras were shitheads, but tkk iii is just two hours of daniel being emotionally and physically tortured. 

like, the third movie is.............chaotic, to put it nicely, and many people ignore it, but the writers clearly didnt. daniels actions are, in a way, responding so much more to the events of tkk iii than to the first movie ie. johnny himself, AND. daniel doesnt rly seem to have dealt with that trauma? he never told sam? doesnt feel like hes ever told amanda? he doesnt even say terrys name out loud? freaks Out over kreese ? the way he reacts to robbys deceit? his FACE when he walks past the new "fear does not exist in this dojo" paint or kreeses photo? hmMm i sense Pain

his fashion tho........... disappointing. where are the flower shirts daniel huh we had one (1) shirt what a tragedy STOP WEARING SUITS ALL THE TIME . also the band ts/grunge bi are a look for johnny but part of me longs for the preppy lovable 80s bully chic johnny lawrence getups

weird that they never used that last moment of karate kid where johnny kinda... snaps out of his anger and hands daniel the trophy almost in tears. like “youre alright larusso, good match” “thanks a lot”  that being their last direct interection seems like itd be perfect fruit for cobra kai but... they just dont. weird. 

especially when, the FIRST SCENE they see each other, suposedly in 30+ years, the first thing to come out of daniels mouth is QUOTE "u still got those golden locks huh?" WHO SAYS SHIT LIKE THAT DANIEL FUCKING SAN 

also amandas immediate reaction "your pretty boy rival?" like. can we talk about the fact that daniel had to have imparted to his wife the very important information that his high school bully/karate rival was like Really Cute and Fucking Hot Actually

 the writers Knew exactly what they were doing and honestly.............. power to them

tkk director voice: and billy was just so cute  

also I was thinking that daniel sounded strangely fond in that first scene, and i wonder if he developed a weird affection for johnny on the grounds that of all of his Karate Rivals johnny was actually the only one who didn’t actively tried to literally kill him

i was actually delightedly surprised with how great the chemistry between them is, like from the get go i am Invested. their rl friendship totally bleeds through and its fantastic

. granted, idiots enemies to lovers friends is my Thing so i am biased  

johnny lawrence: i am down in the dumps, i fucked up my whole life and my sons probably, largely in light of the trauma that the father figure sensei and the philosophy of my karate inflicted on me and all my friends. u know what i should do, as a traumatized, unreliable mess of an adult? teach that same philosophy to some other kids! what could go wrong! 

but really i enjoy the setup of it. i kinda like that i watched it late because, season 1 was johnny setting himself up for failure in a way and it was exciting to watch it all go to shit sjfn

Like. his heart might be in the right place, but theres just.... not a way to teach something like ‘strike hard, no mercy’ and not have it fuck up a kid 

case and point: aisha, miguel and hawk become annoying as all hell over that bullshit in the end of s1, even before shit gets truly fucked up

billys subtle panicked eyes when he sees hawk and miguel fighting dirty in the all valley was SO GOOD especially in parallel with the panic that is so visible in his face in the movie when kreese tells bobby to injure daniel and in the sweep the leg scene 

seen people question wether kreese should have returned and i absolutely think he needed to. johnny needed to realize that cobra kais fundamentals are flawed, at the root, beyond kreese himself being a toxic piece of shit 

also who are we kidding? we are here to see the tkk characters play on new playgrounds!

i get what they're doing abt kreeses backstory, ( also. cobra kai. pq eles caem nas cobras djjs sorry) but did it need to take up that much time? feels like they couldve  done it in half the run time and developed some other stories better 

martin kove has such an evil eye. i love it

love that we get a good follow up to kreese breaks johnnys trophy and tries to CHOKE HIM in the parking lot, which happened in the movie and then....................... was never mentioned again

“the gang is all back together again” aaaa u piece of SHIT 

also. terry silver is definetely appearing ha ha ha PAIN i cant wait

seen ppl say kreese was too much of a cartoon villain like..........................oh......... sweetie........... u dont even Know

interested how johnny will fit into that bc kreese was simping rly hard for johnny here. like i did not expect him to be so adamant to have him with cobra kai ... under his control, sure, but he really wants johnny by his side despite already having control of the dojo and how will terry silver self appointed jon kreeses forever simp going to feel abt that? 

like bitchs dropping by every episode like ‘joooooohnny ..... come bacc to me joooonny......... this ur last warning! for real this time johnny! i wont say it again! watch me ! im leaving johnny! im rly leaving ! im dragging a chair” and johnny is just like. dont let the door hit ya bitch it was so funny pls

and on that subject oof, johnny! doesnt! Know! he doesnt get that side of daniels cobra kai trauma. and i kind of.............. cannot wait for ck 2021 johnny lawrence to meet terry silver like. what a shit show i need a front row seat and popcorn (imagine terry tries some greasy charm and johnny just roundhouse kicks him in the teeth bc he just doest Not Have the Patience for This. glorious)

feels like we, as a society, should acknowledge that cobra kai will never die................ bc their sense of design is just chefs kiss. their name is COBRA KAI. they have sexie sleeveless black gis. theyve sneks. colorful leather jackets with embroided naja insignia, the get ppl thru the aesthetics. evil geniuses

the flashback cuts : masterpiece behavior

the other takes!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! of the movie!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! the differente angles!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! of the FIGHT!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! THE CLOSE UP ON JOHNNYS FACE AT THE KICK 

that scene of daniel and johnny vibing to 80s music in the car. just. oh my god. the fan wish fullfilment. no thoughts head empty.

the new characters! theyre .... good. but. idk. i really like miguel (save for the annoying phase mid s1 - end s2) and amanda, who is a damn riot and has some functioning braincells, but everyone else is       

like dont get me wrong, i dont hate anyone,its not a jane and rafael from jtv situation,  and i am interested and invested in their arcs, but i wouldnt say i like   Like them, as in, personality wise 

like, sams grappling with ptsd was rly gutting and i enjoyed that plus her slight rage issues, 

which nicely parallel torys rage issues. torys background is all over the place tho so im pretty on the fence abt her so far

robby deserves better in every way, and i like how smart and cunning and surprisingly sweet he is

hawk............... is there i guess,

 demetri is annoying in the best way possible,

 carmen is sweet but. i just feel like her character is blunted to make the johnny relationship easier. like when shes furious with him after miguels injury but then forgives him like an episode later? and then convinces him to fight for the tournament bc she had a karate epiphany off screen even tho she was always against it? meh. feels like with the plot thiccening she was swallowed and now shes like a crutch for johnny mora than anything, which is disappointing.

aisha was cool and im kinda mad she wasnt in s3, especially bc a storyline with her tory and sam was like RIGHT THERE , but also... cant say i was super super fond of her... doesnt feel like we ever spent enough time on her

moon the bi icon, 

overall its a good cast but the main draw for me remains the og cast 

the tory/sam miguel/robby Thing. enjoy how theyre Narrative Foils and i like how their stories were so dramatically entangled but oh god give me a break with the teenage love square for the love of god. if u gonna put us through that at least have the decency to not make it so straight

and honestly some sam/tory        miguel/robby romantic tension would even make more sense. just saying! 

also im not sure how i feel abt the cobra kai: red miyagi do: blue theyre going with since some of daniels most iconic looks in tkk are also red. like it was a color they (johnny and him) sorta shared. i get it, opposite but complementary but idk... a little too fire nation and water tribe for me .

 and like the cobra kai kids are so funny abt it bc their outifts grow progressively more ridiculously coordinated. its like do they group chat every morning before leaving their houses? 

robby still sticks out like that tho. he went thru an athleisure/daniel san tsleeves phase and now hes back in the bandts grunge, but his color scheme doesnt fully blend with the other cobra kais. hmmmm.

LOVED LOVED LOVED both the okinawa episode and the cobra kais easy rider episode just such good good heart aching fun

bobby is an icon. he was in tkk and he is now ck hope appears more and more

 tommy is like the most iconic background character. all his lines, freaking gold then and now. sigh :( 

the framing in the okinawa trip was so good everything was so good

i stand by the fact that kumiko was the love interest daniel had the most chemistry with and shes is overall such a joy to watch, loved to see her again, idola, fashion icon

also tkk ii is good u guys are just mean

also really enjoyed chozens role in the episode, his evolution; i love that they introduced the pressure points (ty lee the blueprint) and! the honk + karate! cousins! absolutely iconic

when kumiko reads mr miyagis letters........ oh my god, my eyes FILLED with tears, it was so heart wrenching :(( tamlyns delivery was so emotional and lovely and its so obvious everyone involved in ck has so much love and respect for pat morita and mr miyagi as character, and i adore that it exists like this electric current through the show

when we were watching i told my sister i thought that ali would be miguels big shot surgeon and ngl i am so disappointed that didnt happen. hire me cobra kai writers

also the johnny ali daniel amanda chemistry? off the charts

AND the sassy retconning of daniel and alis breakup! LMAO ‘I HOPE U DIDNT TELL MR MIYAGI IT WAS MY FAULT’ HFDJJGNKFKSD

i am preeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeetty sure back injuries dont work like that    but oke

daniel and johnny are so good together whenever, like they never actually help the kids or get shit done and end up fighting anyway but its just so much fun when theyre hanging

JOHNNY LAWRENCE AND DANIEL LARUSSO FIGHTING TOGETHER

daniels “plan” on how to get robby to juvie was so stupid. literally were u TRYING to make him hate you. dumbass

parents at those hearing rly brave for ppl that did not do ANYTHING as their kids got involved in a karate gang war until now

“bullshit i heard u were the real bully!” i mightve screeched

this s3 ending was SO DRAMATIC omg

everyone is such a MESS go to THERAPY u unhinged motherfckers

also im sorry but uh. a richass neighborhood in california doesnt have some type of neighborhood watch? the larussos rly dont have any security at all? neighbors wont hear the sound of a damn karate brawl happening next door??? also wasnt tory all like ooo i cant go to juvie, my mom yada yada yet shes always running around town getting into fights even at the rich girls house she was kicked out of school for fighting??   ?  ??    ??        ?                ?    ?          ??                  ?    ? girl??

stop destroying the larussos house, its so pretty :((((

sam finding her center looking at mr miyagis picture...  uwu maybe

robby yelling ‘U ARE WEAAK’@  johnny \as he is easily blocking him is like.... so funny and so sad to me. sweetheart. 

also i know it was meant as ‘oh johnny pushes him and HURTS HIM’ but it just looks like robby runs himself into the lockers and IM SO SORRY I FEEL SO BAD BUT IT WAS SO FUNNY 

i like that he and tory are the cobra kai kids now. we need ppl we care abt there to not revert to a good vs evil schtick, and this is the most engaging it could be... tho it hurts that these kids cant catch a break

ah yes "lets bet some real shit on the result of this teen karate tournament bc that is always a great idea" is BACK

so daniel saves johnny from kreese..... maybe johnny will save him from terry 🧐

and dojos unite ohohoho. lets SEE how that’ll work out 

miguels face of Despair when the ck defectors and the md kids are bickering like 'this is never gonna work' : gold

also. Johnny Lawrence is gonna learn some myiagi-do karate AHAAHSJAKDFH

 ive been waiting for this moment all my lifeeee oh lawrd 

final thoughts! there are def things i hope the writers will improve on the next season, but i am very excited for it either way AND i feel like it has made me enjoy the movies even more and that is a win for a reboot/sequel to me!!

[ajokeformur-ray]

I watched Joker tonight and typed out my thoughts as they occurred to me. Unedited; typos are guaranteed. I did this a few months ago and really enjoyed looking back at my thought process and I wanted to do it again so that I can look back and know that what I feel is real and true in my darkest times.

You're welcome to skip this; it's under a cut for ease of doing so. Warnings for occasional sexual comment lmao. There’s no self shipping in this, I don’t think.

word count: 2, 575.

I’M SOBBING and I’ve only just pressed play.

Heart squeeze Chest much ow

THERE HE IS

✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨

Nooooo baby omg don’t pretend - let yourself hurt if it hurts. Don’t pretend. 

Carnival Carnival Carnivalllllllll 😍😍😍😍😍

I am a Simp for one clown and his name is Carnival

Someone help him, I????

That sign hit Arthur as hard as my love for him did ksksksk

MY EYES BE LEAKIN💔💔💔💔💔

bb nooooo

Oh honey let me kiss those bruises and replace the marks of violence with love, hm? You’re safe with me.

Breathe, my love. Don’t fight the laughter. Let it out, let yourself go. 

Screams into a pillow because????? much sad must kiss

“have you been keeping up with your journal?” LIKE HE HAS TIME

oHHHHH boi’s close to losing his shit

Do it, Artie. Give ‘em hell.

“I think I did” YOU TELL HER!!💖💖💖

I want to be his cigarette. Where’s Satan??? I got a new deal for my blackened soul which he took at half price😂😂😂😂

I’d have my hand between the door and his head so fuckin fast I swear

“I just don’t wanna feel so bad anymore” yep SAME

ohhhh peekaboo🥺🥺🥺

this makes me giggle ksksksk i watch this scene when i feel sad bc it always makes me happy for the time it’s on

he’s so good with kids; he doesn’t have to try and think about what’s funny, he just does it, he’s himself and it works

FUCK OFF LADY CAN’T YOU SEE HE’S STRUGGLING????

give

him

back

his

card

casually wrinkling my nose against tears lmao

ohhh the way he looks up at those stairs from the bottom

i can feel his exhaustion

me too, my love

step step step step

god i wanna get him the fuck outta gotham

and into my arms and a soft, warm blanket

“eat. you need to eat” LITERALLY WHAT I TELL MYSELF EVERY DAY IN HIS VOICE BC OTHERWISE I JUST WOULDNT EAT???? I’m losing so much weight asdfghjk its not enough tho

SUPAH RATS

Did Arthur come up w that joke or was it actually a Murray joke????

HIS VOICE IS SO SOFT IM CRY??🥺🥺🥺🥺

“I WAS PUT HERE TO SPREAD JOY AND LAUGHTER”

YOU DO BABY, YOU DO!!!! EVERY FUCKING DAY!!!!

go deepthroat a cactus randall - youre already a bit of a prick so🙃🙃🙃

“THE GUYS THINNK YOU’RE A FREAK BUT I LIKE YOU”

HOYT. YOU CAN GO SIT ON A CACTUS TOO

FUCK OFF

😡😡😡😡

“WHY WOULD ANYONE STEAL A SIGN”//”WHY DOES ANYONE DO ANYTIHNG?” HOYT YOU’RE SO FUCKING ILLOGICAL HERE IM????? ERIKA DOES NOT (ALSO WILL NOT LMAO IM A STUBBORN BIITCH) COMPUTE

Can arthur fuck me like he pounds the trash/????🥵🥵👀

those dark curls.... that crooked tooth... must kiss.🥺🥺🥺

pennys casual cruelty makes me so fucking angry

foreshadowingggggg ~  *JAZZ HANDS*

ugh the way he dances with that gun im👀🥵🥵🥵

he enjoys the power of it and his breathing gets deeper asdfghjk

clumsy baby omggggg i just COOED 🥺🥺🥺🥺

okay maybe im stupid but i genuinely dont understand this “senior who needs to graduate” skit i’m??? how is being an intro to western civ student funny im???? someone explain???

but also dont bc fuck that guy lmao arthur’s hilarious

true millenial humour (and brit humour lmao we’re dark asf)

THE WAY ARTIE TWIRLS HIS FINGERS AROUND HIS HAIR AND DANCES IN HIS SEAT IM???🥺🥺🥺

wanna curl up on his lap at night when hes writing and go to sleep with a 

blanket around our bodies🥺🥺🥺🥺

when arthur wears a shirt at home you KNOW it’s a daydream

THAT CROOKED TOOTH IM WANT KISS.

WAIT IS IT CALLED STAND UP COMEDY BC YOU STAND UP... AND ITS COMEDY???

23 FUCKING YEARS, PEOPLE... TO REALISE THAT🙄

WHEN CARNIVAL CAME ON SCREEN I NTHE HOSPITAL I MADE A PORNOGRAPHIC NOISE LMAO I LOVE HIM SO MUCH

IF YOURE HAPPY AND YOU KNOW IT, SHOOT MURRAY

WOOPS WRONG LYRICS

😂

“doctor of laughter”🥺🥺🥺🥺

doctor i have a case of the Big Sad can you... do an exam? 😉😏

NO BB DONT BEAT YOUR HEAD UP THERES PRECIOUS CARGO IN THERE

in what world does chucking cold greasy chips in a girls hair being “nice”???

lmao fuck these guys

ohhh honey breathe. dont fight it, my love, just breathe.

my heart’s breaking for you, you sweet thing🥺🥺🥺

i love you so so so so so so so much ugh you’re an actual fucking angel

just breathe darling

i need to get you a cup of tea with honey in it, your throat must be so sore

ohhhh baby im so sorry

i’d take every single punch if i could

i’d die for you

i wish i could protect you

i wish i could look after you

and take all those hits

and kill those guys for you

im so sorry

sobbingggg

YES GOOD MAN THANK YOUUU

KILL THOSE ASSHOLES LMAO DESERVED IT

yeah i have a grey morality... im similar to deadpool in that way tbh

carnival comin’ to kill your insecurities

8 bullets in a 6 chamber???? mm-hm

DONT FORGET YOUR BAG THATS EVIDENCE

AND THE WIG

RUN BABY RUNNNNNNN

GO GO GO GOOOOOOOOOOOO

RUN LIKE THE WIND BULLSEYE

THE SOUND OF HIS FEET SLAPPING THE PAVEMENT IM👀

OOOOOH JOKER’S WAKIN’ UUUUUUP

fuck he’s so hypnotic

the way he runs his hand down his lower stomach asdfghj🥵

must kiss the inner tendons on his wrists and lick the blood off his face 

must kiss

he moves like water

fuck hes so fluid

bathroom scene = the scene in which my heart and vagina clench at the same time

im WANT

T POSEEEEEEEE

“i still owe you for that, dont i?”

PUNCH OUT IS MY FAVOURITE THING E  V  E  R

D O N T S M I LE

UGH I FUCKING HATE being told to smile if i don’t fucking want to so BIG mood

PLEASE SHUSH ME THE WAY YOU JUST SHUSHED PENNY IM???

but also dont lmao bc i’ll think you’re mad at me and i’ll hide in the bedroom for the rest of the day lmao i’m sensitive✨✨✨

i wanna sit on his lap and still his bouncing knees

“thats not funny”

fuck off penny yes it is

I JUST CHOKED ON MY COFFEE IM???

“but i do” god the  P O W E R

ugh that fucking sexist piece of shit comedian can choke “women look at sex like buying a car” 🤢🤮🤢🤢🤮

chauvinistic pigs can die thanks

his lil trip upstage im cry🥺🥺🥺

ohhh baby. just breathe, darling. it’s okay to be scared. dont fight it. just breathe. 

he and i both cover our mouths when we laugh/smile in the exact same way and it makes me feel closer to him

how can they think hes laughing at himself when hes literally gagging????

people only see what they wanna

the Penny imitation is👌👌👌

s m i l e

i remember when i came home from seeing this for the first time, i got home and dropped to my knees to cry in the bathroom. it was such an emotional release and so much love and i played smile to try to make myself smile but i only made myself cry harder lmaooooo ~ 

smile and thats life are my go-to songs if i gotta cheer tf up

danger sign = neither works

he looks so soft after his “date”🥺🥺🥺

“thats life” yeah but murray you dont even leave the studio so how do you know????

ngl arthur’s anger scares me.

anyone so much as raise their voice at me and i’ll cry really bad and i will shut myself away for the rest of the day and quiet anger terrifies me so his banging abt in the kitchen would freak me tf out😲

angry bb😭

he controls his anger so fast though omgggg ~ 

that soft please sends me

idk where it sends me lmao

down below probably

BARE FACED CARNIVAL OMG THIS SCENE IS SO CUTE

I LOVE THE MATCHING COLOURS ON ARTHUR AND BRUCE TOO ???

okay but the implication that arthur always carries a clown nose on him is🥺🥺🥺

hes such a good clown im?????

lmao im enjoying the show more than bruce is skskskk

arthur’s lil chuckle makes me🥺

his HUMMING im??? soft?????

his brows are so strong and dark omggg ~ he’s so beautiful

OKAY i’ll be honest i’ve seen this alfred/bruce scene and the thomas bathroom scene later on and the penny flashback scene a 100 times and i still dont fucking understand what did or didnt happen regarding arthur’s parentage im????

 ive seen interpretations to say he is thomas’ son and some to say he isnt and i still cant decide so? im stupid i guess 🙃

“a clown thing?” the  s a s s

“it’s exit only” yeah so’s my ass🙃

if i was there in the hospital room i woulda turned that tv off as soon as i realised what clip was gonna play

murray’s cruelty is d i s g u s t i n g

lmao hes an asshole

arthurs lil clap from joyyyyy ~ 🥺🥺🥺

did i say murray???

i meant  m u r r a t

🙃🙃🙃

sneaky baby

wayne hall either has super bad security or arthurs v quick on his feet

🤔🤔🤔🤔

he looks so good in red omggg ~ 

f o r e s h a d o w i n g

arthurs smile when hes watching chaplin is how he smiles when we all gush to each other abt him and ourselves!!!

hes so cuuuuuute🥺🥺🥺🥺😭😭😍😍😍🥰🥰🥰

“told me what” 

ohhhh honey🥺🥺 im so sorry. “crazy” is a trigger word for arthur; it made him start laughing in the bathroom with thomas

“touch my son again ill fucking kill you” yeah?? touch my arthur again and i’ll fucking kill you🙃🙃🙃🙃

^^^ that ones a joke do not come at me

the clerk in arkham was nice to arthur - he, gary and sophie are the good gothamites.

none of it was enough to stop his descent into joker, though, and i’d even say it was too late right at the beginning of the film, too... 

his sock puppet thingy “they cut all those” is such a Joker thing to doooo ~ 

the way arthur’s laughing in the hall at arkham turns into sobbing is gut-wrenching omg the poor thing😭

i wanna hug him and protect him and help him to process this in a healthy way

sweetheart, if i could take all of your pain and put it onto me... i so would. i’d do it in a heartbeat.

i wanna get you into a hot shower, make you some food and sit and listen to you. we can either sit in silence or you can talk to me, my love, and you will be heard and understood and loved.

“i had a bad day”

IT’S OKAY I DIDNT NEED MY HEART ANYWAY OMG YOU POOR SWEET INNOCENT THING IM LOVE YOU🥺💔

THAT ENTIRE LATE NIGHT SCENE LAUGH/SOBBING GOT ME -

💔💔💔💔💔💔💔💔💔💔💔💔💔💔

i just wanna hold you and protect you and help you and love you

I’m so fucking sorry, darling. i wish i could take it all away from you

“i havent been happy one minute of my entire fucking life”

NO ONE SHOULD LOOK THAT ANGELIC AFTER COMMITING MATRICIDE IM????

get

that

fucking

gun

away

from

your

face

boi dont test me ill fucking go feral or - no, tell you what, i’ll point the gun at me and see how you like it

im looking respectfully at the green speckled undies scene....👀👀👀

“coming” 😏😏😏

“my mum died im celebrating” and “i stopped taking my medication” and you STILL stayed in the apartment with Arthur????? dudes those are 🚨🚨🚨 signs

woe betide anyone who underestimates arthur fleck lmaoooo

randalls death scene makes me laugh every time omg i feel so vindictive

get WRECKED

i wanna lick the blood off his face. i really want to

ngl i think i have a blood kink... 

“dont look just go” ME WITH MY ACNE WHEN I SEE IT IN THE MIRROR 😂😂😂😂

JOKERJOKERJOKERJOKER 

ASDFGHJKL

J

O

K

E

R

ERIKA.EXE HAS STOPPED WORKING

JOKERJOKERJOKERJOKERJOKERJOKERJOKERJOKERRRRRR

😍😍😍😍😍😍😍😍😍😍😍😍😍😍😍😍😍😍😍😍😍😍😍😍😍😍😍😍😍😍😍😍😍😍😍😍😍😍😍😍😍😍😍 MY BABY MY MAN OMG THERE HE IS IM CRY???????😭🥺😭🥺😭🥺

my mind is literally blank rn im just staring and crying and smiling so hard my face hurts????? im love him so so so so much

sweet thing’s so used to pain he gets HIT BY A CAR AND KEEPS GOING????

I LOVE YOU I LOVE YOU I LOVE YOU I LOVE YOU I LOVE YOU I LOVE YOU I LOVE YOU I LOVE YOU I LOVE YOU

hghhhhhhhhhhhhhh

euirrrrrrgkjbgkfbirsghigrbugr

*incoherent keyboardsmash to portray utter love*

ohhh baby no dont cry. oh honey😭 i wanna sit on your lap and kiss your tears away

“i love dr sally”

you have a WIFE at home

“DO YOU REMEMBER?” THAT WAS YOUR CUE TO APOLOGISE LMAO GET FUCKED MURRAT

he’s so CUTE

omgggg ~ 

my hearts gonna give out its SQUEEZING SO HARD IT HURTS

YOU MOCK THEM, BABY!!! THEY GOT IT COMING

“i wanna get it right” hes so passionate

my comments have deceased in number bc im just too starstruck and in love to even think clearly lmao

jokers all i know rn and this is the most peaceful ive felt in WEEKS

im sobbing

ugh fuck this hurts so BAD

youre speaking the truth, darling. im so so proud of you and i love you so much

“THEY COULDNT CARRY A TUNE TO SAVE THEIR LIVES” LMAO INSIDE JOKESSS

literally sobbing right now ugh what the fuck youre in so much pain and in the middle of a breakdown and no one saw you

ugh baby im so sorry, you deserve so much better

you tried so hard and you were gonna fall no matter what

IN THE WHITE ROOM

“hi” baby they cant hear you but im COOING 🥺🥺🥺🥺

you’re so fucking cute

say the word and ill burn gotham to the fucking ground for you

i wanna sit atop that car and cradle your head in my lap and wipe the blood off your face and help you stand up and be there for you and and and😭😭😭😭😭😭 i love you so so so much. 

i’d be so much worse off without you in my life. you brought a splash of colour which has never dimmed or faded. it never will. 

b l o o d    s m i l e

=

im wearing my inside on the outside now and it still hurts

angel💔💔💔💔💔💔💔💔💔

i see you and your pain. i love you.

i see you, angel. 

his genuine laughter is🥺🥺🥺🥺🥺

that cute lil “ksksks” he does im🥺🥺🥺

i always laugh with him omg the two of us are laughing together ugh its the closest i will ever get to sharing in his joy

 t h a t ‘s    l i f e

i love the hallway daaaaaaaaaaaaaance ~ 

them hips dont lie😉😉😉

i love you i love you i love you i love you omg the sun’s like a halo ugh i love you i love you i love you i love you i love you i love you i love you i love you i love you i love you i love you im singing along to thats life while i type out how much i love you at 220am lmaooooo ~ 

i   l o v e    y o u

[izukult]

sorry i can’t have you? one up me? so this playlist isn’t part of the matchups i’m sorry😞🤝

here you go IDIOT CHILD ( @rat-bastar ) being your friend is so hard 😁

choke - i don’t know how but they found me

ok absolutely your vibes. if you got the chance you would bitch slap me, we both know it. you big ol bully. this is the vibey pop ish version of a villain song and it’s such a hype song in my opinion idk

love me dead - ludo

we’ve established its a good song ok🤝. idk lmao play this while you’re thinking ab your friend OR her ex gf ;) as of my knowledge those the mfs you simp for or whateva LMAO

lemons (demo)

please. PLEASE THIS ONE IS SO OBVIOUS. you vibes. absolute you vibes. you @ me. you @ everyone. you play this on full volume while you try to convince yourself you hate everyone. you play this while judging every violin player ever. you play this glaring at maliek or whagever his name is. this song is you

piano man - billy joel

i saw this on one of your playlists lol BUT i feel like this is something you would blare on the bus or on your way to a fucking debate tournament you fucking loser

hesitation - hot flash heat wave

such a good song. this also feels like something you would listen to while you think ab other people. i dunno it’s got that sweet, sweet ‘condescending to hide real emotions’ energy and it’s vibey and it’s kinda sad yea

waltz #2 (xo) - elliott smith

don’t even get me started on how big of an elliott smith can i was. you def give him vibes but i mean that as a compliment?? i can imagine you with ur head down hands in ur pockets being all bummed out and angry walking up the hill to ur house idk that’s very niche oddly specific? i never really realized this song had BIG BIG BIG you vibes until i started typing this but i’m listening to the lyrics and it’s like describing you go off ig

everyone hates his parents - falsettos

i know you love falsettos and we both know we love to shit talk our parents so. it just seems to make sense. ALSO i feel like we would argue like marvin and trina or marvin and whizzer or marvin and anyone LOL

colorful penguins - we shore is dedicated

ok i know iM the one working, but this song please. listen to it. listen to the music. to the tone of voice. to the certain old tavern rustic vibe. that’s you. i cant rly describe it but the vibe of this song is your vibe

beachboy - mccafferty

well we have the shared mother’s name in the beginning there and that’s fun for me. also we know that i be smoking and yada yada and i know your friends do too and i feel like this song is just you dealing w ur friends dummy habits and angry fast sing

hannah - swmrs

something about this song just feels like a convo we’d have?? like in my head i can tell what you would say and what i would say IDK LMAO maybe that’s just me but it’s also a good song

problems - mother mother

this song. LMAOOOO. the way you constantly BULLY me i feel like this song is how you present urself to other ppl v some deep shit like how you feel ab urself idk i’m not ur therapist ur apparently mine w how much you be psychoanalyzing me🤨. ALSO you’d scream this dont argue w me

i love you like an alcoholic - the taxpayers

multiple things here. again those crusty cobblestone streets at night after it rains where someone’s getting murdered in an alleyway vibes that you give. and i feel like if u were ever like <3 at someone, this is how you’d feel idc bitch

seashore - the regrettes

i love this band sm pls i want to kiss her. ANYWAY feels again like a you @ the world song. you just feel like someone who would shove someone in a trash can if they said one wrong word about you & i rly appreciate it

gooey - glass animals

this song feels like something that would be on a playlist with “i know this:” and i thought you’d like those vibes. sorry for the peanut butter reference

chicago - flipturn

you feel like someone who would let me play flipturn and pretend to hate it cos you pretend to hate everything i do but actually vibe w it so

everybody loves raymond (except for me) - mookamay

this is the girl i was tellin u ab who wrote the songs ab me YEA THIS IS ONE OF THE SONGS AB ME SO I FIGURED YOU WOULD APPRECIATE A SONG THAT WAS KIND OF A SLIGHT TO ME SO LMAO I PUT IT ON THERE. basically this is a song ab someone literally getting tired of ME so yknow felt fitting 😁‼️ (this one is mostly a joke and i will probably take it off the playlist but it still stands)

power over me - dermot kennedy

you seem like someone who would listen to dermot kennedy which is fair bc i used to scream this shit in the shower i would just have a lil concert and you give me the same vibe this one isn’t that deep

ghost duet - louie zong

lol some serotonin. just this playin in the background while u game

iris - the goo goo dolls

just a rly good song. just a rly good song that fits ur vibe. also if u were ever in love i also stand by saying you would listen to this & think ab them

dream sweet in sea major - miracle musical

if you were ever listen to “soft music🥺✊” this would be your version of it

bs - still woozy

I TOLD U TO LISTEN TO THIS AND I DONT THINK YOU DID YOU BITCH SO NOW I WILL FORCE YOU. also i have brown eyes so basically this is everyone including u @ me it’s ok ur human u can’t be blamed for acknowledging my charm ;) 😁🤝

paper thin hotel - matt maltese

you just seem like someone who would listen to him during a depressive episode

troubled mind - cannibal kids

cant find the right words for this one but like gives me you trying to be there for someone and coming off as apathetic and someone not knowing how to be a proper friend to you and yall just space vibes yknow what i mean?? Idk

bloom (bonus track) - the paper kites

if you and a girl (strictly a girl idc that this was written by a dude no fucking guy gets this song) were in love. like in any way. romantic love, platonic love, competitive love idgaf i just feel like THIS has the vibe for u

kill the director - the wombats

i don’t care THIS IS YOU IN LOVE. I THINK YOUD HATE HAVING REAL FEELINGS FOR SOMEONE. YOUD DEF BE THE PERSON TO IGNORE IT AND YOU BULLY THEM JUST A L I L EXTRA AND YOU DO LIL THINGS THAT SHOW U LIKE EM LIKE IF YOU RLY PAY ATTENTION YOU CAN PICK IT UP but no way you’re gonna express that shit LMAO

i got the blues - big bill broonzy

i dunno this ones just a banger

dirty imbecile - the happy first

this is you having a breakdown. that’s all! thanks queen!

under my skin - jukebox the ghost

very similar to lemons but also different?? you getting pissed at everyone but having a select couple ppl you cherish 👍

song for me - greer

where do i START? you not properly voicing emotions ? preppy pessimism ? dissociation ? vibing ? teen angst ? good vibes ? in love w ideas ?

my explanations aren’t as good as urs but also i’m cool so 👍 ur welcome you’ve been blessed by a personalized playlist from ME 🙄🙌 not from no bitchass capitalist anime character 😐

[zenosanalytic]

People What Aint From Round Here Is The Problem...

So I just watched Once Upon a Time... In Hollywood and I have THOUGHTS:

Ive read a few reviews&ruminations on this film at this point and I can’t believe that none of them got(or at least, mentioned explicitly) the primary thesis of this movie, spcl given that Tarentino flatly states it out the mouth of his primary protagonist within, like, the first 15-20mins of the film: “...most important thing in this town is when you’re making money you buy a house in town. You don’t rent... Hollywood real estate means you live here. You’re not just visiting, not just passing through. You fuckin live here.” i.e., the most important thing in Hollywood, to Hollywood, is the people FROM Hollywood; Everyone else is just a filthy, trouble-making tourist or profiteer who is “Passing Through” and “Doesnt Get It” and  “Is Fucking It Up”(It being the film industry), and probably “Secretly Hates Movies”. There are places and aspects of this movie that are basically a Nativist Angeleno rant, written by a life-long Angeleno film-nerd-turned-film-maker, against Hollywood’s critics(and his critics which he just totally conflates with the former), and probably non-Angelenos(and non-Californians?) in general.

There are two ways to read this thesis: Straight and Subverted/Satirized.

The evidence for reading it straight is pretty plentiful. Lots of reviews have puzzled at where the line connecting the constant hippie-bashing, the weird focus on knocking Polanski’s Polishness & preference for shooting in London, and the inexplicable pot-shot at Bruce Lee is, and I think this is it. “The Hippies” are repeatedly presented as a corrupting force: digging through trash, living in squalourous filth at the Spahn Ranch dragging members of “Old Hollywood” like its owner into it with them, selling drugs, and using sex to “control” men. And attached to this is presenting “The Hippies” as foreign; not only from another place, but refusing to assimilate with the LA way of life and hostile to it. The Manson family are the only explicitly identified “Hippies” in the film(other than, possibly, the one who sells Cliff an acid cig). The only “positive” portrayals of Bruce Lee in the film are silent ones of him teaching anglos kung fu, which has some fairly obvs and well-understood Implications.

But there’s also good evidence for reading it as subverted and satirized. Both Tate and Dalton are NOT from California, let alone LA, and Booth’s origins are left unclear. Dalton’s the only one of them explicitly id’d as being from elsewhere(Missouri), but Tate’s easy to google and she was a military kid who grew up all over the place. When Dalton returns from Italy, that sequence and his look in it are VERY reminiscent of the scenes introducing Polanski at the beginning of the film. The side-characters around Tate, perennially shown in a positive light, are also non-Angelenos. Doing Spaghetti Westerns revitalizes Dalton’s career, despite his disdain for Italian cinema. Tate and her crew, while not explicitly ID’d as “Hippies” and often shown in Mod and other fashion styles, are also presented in “Hippie” fashion, shown listening to “Hippie” music, smoking the “Hippie” Reefer(Im sorry, but Comedy Demanded this phrasing and I am Devout u_u), and implied to be living a polyamorous “Hippie” life.

It really is difficult for me to say which predominates. On the one entirely metaphorical hand, the ways in which Dalton’s Angeleno chauvinism are subverted and mocked are fairly obvs, but on the other emh, the film is FILLED with LITERALLY GLOWING nostalgia for this pre-Hippy, pre-Lefty, pre-70s, Conservative and Republican California&Los Angeles. Dalton’s focus on property-ownership&the film industry in the opening thesis could easily be seen as resolving these subversive contradictions to allow for a straight read(ie: Tate, Booth, and Dalton are “Hollywood People” who’ve both bought real-estate in LA, and who’ve grown up in film or film-adjacent fields and choose to center their adult lives in the film industry). So much, in fact, that I kinda started to wonder abt QT’s politics while watching it. And, if it WAS satirical, then what’s the point of the knock to Bruce Lee and focusing criticisms of Polanski on his Polishness and shooting in London? Is that just meant to characterize Dalton and Booth as nativists and racists?

It really cannot be said enough that there are REALLY MORE APPROPRIATE CRITICISMS to make of Polanski than 1)begin Polish, 2)possessing boyish effeminacy, and 3)preferring to shoot movies in London instead of LA. Which are this movie’s only problems with him(though it also takes the time to show him bitchily smoking a cigarette in an evening gown while being rude to a dog). Obvsl I dont object to villainizing an ACTUAL REAL LIFE VILLAIN like this shitstain, but I DO object to being asked(albeit gently) to participate in this film’s understated nationalist bigotry.

It’s possible that Cliff’s turning Pussycat down during the drive to the ranch was intended to be this but I highly doubt it. And if it was it’d be misrepresenting Polanski’s misdeeds enormously, considering that Pussycat, the too-young girl, is the sexual instigator in this film. Polanski liked to manipulate, drug, and rape underaged girls(he pulled the same shit with models in Europe before getting busted for it in LA, btw, then continued doing it after fleeing back to Europe); really not the same situation.

There’s another irony in that, while the film goes out of its way to call Polanski “boyish” and imply that makes him feminine and that this is Bad, there’s also a subtle under-current that... Tarentino sees himself in his youth the same way? He’s certainly never been short like Polanski and Jay Sebring are/were, QT’s 6 1, but the actors he cast to play them and the description made of the pair in-film are more than a bit reminiscent of how Tarentino looked&was discussed in the press back in the 90s when he was starting out. AAAaaand the film explicitly calls that Tate’s “Type”; leaving me with the question: would Tarentino be able to stop himself from implying a dead starlet would have been attracted to him? I leave the answer to your imaginations, Dear Readers u_u

Having said all that it IS a really good film, which I liked, I dont think it’d be very hard to set aside this political stuff while watching, the driving sequences are especially emotive&exhilarating, and there’s some seriously great acting in it. IDK if I’d say I liked it more than the recent Emma movie, tho.

I feel like each of the trio, Tate, Dalton, and Booth, were meant to symbolically Embody LA/Hollywood/California? Like Pitt especially seemed to be channeling movie characters and CJ from GTA: San Andreas throughout his performance, while I couldnt help but think of Ronald Reagan watching DiCaprio(spcl given the character’s likely politics). So there’s this sense in which the film is a fantasy of “Old Hollywood”, embodied by these three, Vanquishing its “Enemies”, represented by The Hippies(moralizing, pretentious, gross leftist) and potentially Polanski&Lee(foreign film ppl who refuse to integrate into the LA scene). Again, given the political history of Cali after this era, this embodiment raises some questions for me abt the film and QT’s politics(particularly in re: misogyny and feminism).

Also DiCaprio is totally going to get pitched a Reagan biopic off of this role and I sincerely hope he has the good sense to turn that shit the fuck down.

Circling back to the ranting at his critics, this movie was definitely and consciously a response to them. Like: up until the last 5-15 minutes of the film, and aside from a handful of too-lingering too fetishistic too on-the-nose creep shots of the female cast that Tarentino simply could not stop himself from making, OUATiH is precisely the sort of “Serious” film Tarentino’s critics have been saying he should make for decades now(of course he did Jackie Brown, which was that and which he blew Completely out of the park). And then there’s that bloody, gross-out, exploitation-movie ending. I dont actually think it was as bad as many critics were saying it was? For some reason I was thinking there was gonna be a massacre of the ENTIRE Manson family, which would have been totally out of left-field. But it WAS clearly a stinger of a major tone-shift thrown in as a Fuck You to the ppl who’ve called out his violent and exploitative preferences throughout the years. As for me I generally like his movies and think he’s a great filmmaker but he absolutely does go too far sometimes.

Rick Dalton, in an evening-gown, with a mixer full of iced-margarita in one hand, getting all up in the face of the driver of a loud exhaust-spewing jalope in his PRIVATE STREET was TOTALLY Tarentino himself :| By which I mean NOT ONLY that That’s ABSOLUTELY the sort of cameo he would have given himself 30 years ago and if it made any sort of sense at all in the film(which here it wouldnt have, obvsl), BUT ALSO that I feel 94% confident that Tarentino has actually done that at least once in his lifetime :| :|

I think the monologue&interactions T gives Bruce Lee leading up to the fight were probably more insulting to him than the fight itself. Contrary to popular discussion, it isn’t Pitt’s character totally trashing Lee, he gets in one good throw after Lee repeats a successful attack at his request(which I doubt Lee would have ever done from what little I know about him; not being predictable in a fight was his whole Deal), but rather an even duel between them(most of the fight is just the two blocking each others’ attacks). I dont think the film was trying to say “Lee was full of hot-air”, if it wanted to say that it’d have shown him getting trounced instead of showing him knock Booth down then trade him blow for blow, but more “Lee was pretty arrogant and a bit pretentious”.

OK, that’s abt all that I can think of right now: thanks for reading ^v^

[ravens-rambling]

Prompt: adopted kid!Virgil coming home with Patton and meeting his new brother Roman and other dad Logan (I'm a sucker for fluff lol)

A/N: So uuuuhhhhhhhhh I know you wanted fluff anon but this kinda…accidently turned out completely different and uuhhhh there really isn’t much fluff here mostly angst I AM VERY SORRY!!!! ROMAN IS A BITCH IM SORRY! 

I might write a second part to this? Maybe Pat or Lo finds out how Ro’s been treating V? And they find out why he has (which yes there is a reason) and they comfort him and kinda make him talk to V on what’s wrong blah blah blah. OR I could make it more angsty by having V get sick or injured and Ro realizes how much he actually liked V as a younger brother and starts getting overprotective like an older brother should and they make up blah blah blah. 

So let me know if you guys want a second part to this! 

WC: 2,098

ships: Romantic Logicality 

warnings: Mentions of abuse, mentions of anxiety attacks, mentions of attacks, crying, angst about, Roman being a little bitch, uuhh I think that’s it? Let me know if I miss any please! 

Tag List: @punsterterry @stormcrawler75 @frostedlover @mycatshuman @mutechild @panicattheeverywhere15 @thewinterbookqueen @analogical-mess @saddestlittlebabe

“I’m so glad we get to finally bring you home, kiddo!”

Patton, his new dad, beamed at him from the front seat as he drove. The small toddler smiled faintly back as the older man talked and talked endlessly. Honestly it felt…weird.

Normally when he gets taken to a new house the new parents don’t…particularly enjoy his company, not by a long shot, and they always make it known that he will never truly be a part of the family. He’ll always be an outcast. A nobody. Somebody that people will just throw away. Somebody that people use for the money, and that’s it. That’s all he’s worth, the few scraps of money that people get when they adopt him.

He’ll never actually be anybody’s son, right?

So why was Patton trying to make him feel that way?

The small darkly worn child couldn’t wrap his mind around it.

So instead he stayed silent throughout the entire trip to their home. Or so he wished he could.

“Oh, Virge, do you like dogs?”

He cleared his throat and mumbled back, “They are alright, sir.”

There was a moment of silence then Patton’s blue eyes met his dark ones from the front mirror. The child gulped and shifted in his seat. He screwed up again, didn’t he?

Majority of the parents didn’t like it when he called them dad or mom, they preferred if he called them sir or ma'am. And though they have gone over that he could call him by his first name he couldn’t help but think that it would all change once he is adopted by them right? They don’t have to put up a nice front anymore.

“Sweetie,” He looked back towards the road, “You don’t have to call me that, we’ve been over this. I know people before liked it when you called them that but you don’t have to with me, alright? I’m your dad now. And Lo’s your dad, too.”

“…Okay…” He mumbled under his breath staring back out of the window as he fidgeted with his hoodie sleeve. He didn’t know what to feel or think about this. Calling them dad? That feels…weird? Wrong? He wasn’t sure what the word is. And he wasn’t sure if he would ever get used to it. But he gulped and shifted more in the seat.

Maybe these men would be different than his previous parents? He could only hope so.

That’s all he’s wanted honestly. Family. Parents. A home. Ever since he understood the concept he’s wanted it. But he’s never gotten it. Sure there have been a few families that have seemed like that but in the end… They weren’t.

Virgil was different. Virgil was a problem child. Virgil was a child who still threw tantrums. Virgil was a child that was too much to deal with.

The list went on.

He’s learned over the few years to not have his hopes up the hard way. It’ll only crush him. What’s the point in wasting time and energy like that? What’s the point of getting attached only for it to be thrown out of the window within a few months time?

What’s the point in believing in something that he shouldn’t ever wish for?

Though he does have to admit Patton and Logan were a bit different then the normal parents he’s had. They were more…cheery. More lively. More energetic. Something that he wished to be a part of, something that his heart ached to be a part of. And they kept saying that they loved him. But were that true? Others have said that before only to turn him back in after a few of his attacks saying they were unable to handle him…

Virgil signed under his breath as he still heard Patton talk again. That was until their house was finally in sight. The child stood up straighter in his seat keeping his head down as they drove up the driveway. He stayed silent still as Pat got outside then let him out.

His eyes drifted over the house his eyes widening at the size of it, he wasn’t expecting the house to be this huge! It looked so fancy from the outside Virgil was worried what the inside was going to look like. He’s going to look so out of place here he could just feel it.

“Come on darling. Time to meet your new family!”

He was jerked out of his thoughts as Patton held out a hand for him to grab, his other hand holding his one bag that held all his clothes. And his plushie spider.

A small smile drifted on his lips as he took Patton’s hand and the older man beamed even more as he did so walking the steps towards his new place.

When they walked in Virgil gasped loudly before he could stop himself. This place was huge! The tile along the floor made everything stand out even more and made it look even more gorgeous. The spiraling staircase that made its way upstairs was something he’s only seen out of movies and TV shows. Everything looked beautiful and expensive…

Way more expensive than he was worth, that’s for sure. And just one thing properly is worth more than the most money he’s ever seen in his life.

Patton only giggled at his expression and gasp, “Welcome home, kiddo!”

“Yes, welcome. Salutations, Virgil. It’s great to finally greet you like this.”

His huge eyes looked over towards the voice, his other…dad’s voice. As normal, he looked rather serious and stern. His glasses set perfectly on his nose. His arms behind his back as well as the tie on his neck tied perfectly. But one thing that was different about him was the fact that he was smiling faintly. That’s properly the most emotion he’s ever seen out of this man.

Logan took a step towards him from what he guessed would be the living room, and Patton beamed at him.

“Our kiddo is finally home Lo! I’m so happy!”

“Yes, yes, Pat I can see that. Here, while I calm him down why don’t you take your stuff to your room? It’s the first door to your right, you can’t miss it, while your there Roman should be coming down to greet you too.”

Patton giggled as he practically tackled Logan in a hug almost knocking his glasses askew but luckily he managed to save them in time. Logan chuckled under his breath and rolled his eyes as his arms wrapped around the cardigan-wearing man.

“Pat, you really do need to calm yourself. You’ll freak him out.”

“I know but I can’t help it darling. I’m just so happy! He’s finally here! Our precious son!”

Virgil just stared at the couple, really unable to process this. Logan and Patton had always seemed like true opposites from the moment he met them. Patton always having a wide bubbling smile on his face, always bouncing from one thing to the next. While Logan was always serious and almost stone cold all the time. He didn’t show many emotions. But with Pat like this…

He could see it in the way Logan’s dark blue eyes flickered underneath his glasses, he could see it in the way a half smile danced on his lips. He could see it in the way Patton kissed him and hugged him.

They really were truly in love with each other, despite the complete opposite personalities.

Virgil supposes that opposites do attract in this case.

Without saying a word he took his things from Patton, who was still attached to Logan and made his way upstairs. Once he was out of their view his shoulders sagged.

Oh, how he wished, yes he would even dare to wish this time after seeing that, that he was loved like that. That he was shown love for once in his life. All he’s ever been shown in hate, or malicious, or bitterness.

As his eyes darted with tears he wiped it against his black jacket sleeves trying his best not to break into tears right here and now. In a bit, once he is truly left alone, then he could cry and want all he wants. For now, though, he’s got to appear hopeful, he’s got to appear that he’s happy to be here.

That he’s not going to have his hopes and dreams come crashing down within a few months.

Blinking away the last of the tears he turned towards where Logan said his room would be, silently admiring how the hallway looked and all the fancy stuff that littered the small hallway. Everything in this house was so fancy! He knew he couldn’t dare touch a single thing in fear of being yelled at.

As he stepped in front of the first door next to the stairs he had to smile, however, at what greeted him. There was paper taped at the door frame. Every single one said things like ‘welcome home, kiddo!’ or ‘we are glad you are finally with us.’ and he just had to smile at that. That’s the sweetest thing anybody has ever done for him…

Though just as he was about to grab for the doorknob he heard other door being opened and glanced down the hallway. A boy came out, by the looks of it a few years older than him, his hair was swept towards the side. He wore a red jacket and jeans, and he didn’t look happy.

At the sight of Virgil his nose wrinkled in disgust, his eyes bore the look like he was looking at filth. Like he was trash. Instantly Virgil tried to bury himself in his jacket, as his hand gripped onto the bag tighter.

He’s dealt with these kids before, this is nothing new. Just don’t say anything and they will get bored eventually. Don’t react. Don’t do anything.

He repeated to himself as he heard, what he guessed would be Roman, a step towards him within a few steps he was right at Virgil. His arms were crossed over his chest as he peered down at the small child.

“This is what Dad and Papa bring home? A child that looks like he just came from the garbage? I don’t know why they bothered with you. Eventually, they will kick you out, you know that right?”

Virgil gulped hard as his hands turned bright white against the bag. Tears once again threated to leak down his cheeks. His body was in fear of shaking, no he can’t have a tantrum here. Not yet. Once he gets in his room he could. Just wait it out. Wait this out.

“Well? Are you going to respond? Or are you going to play the dumb card?”

So this was why he never met this Roman. He’s met Patton and Logan quite a number of times. Nearly every time they have mentioned that they had another kid, another son, that would just adore having a baby brother. But he’s never met him until now.

He sees why.

This is just like the other houses though. If they had other kids they would pick on him. Eat his food. Steal his things. Blame things on him so he’ll get in trouble. It only fed into the whole 'problem child’ title that he had.

Guess this house was going to be the same after all.

Luckily he heard Patton calling for Roman to come down and help with things. That made Virgil want to breath out in relief.

Roman tsked under his breath, “Whatever. This conversation isn’t over, trash scum.”

And just like that, he left, taking a few steps than making his way down the stairs. As soon as Virgil could hear him downstairs he bolted inside his new 'room’ not even caring about the things inside. None of it mattered. None of it will matter.

That kid was right. He doesn’t belong here. He never will.

Why did he even think of a possibility that he could?

He threw his body on the bed throwing his bag on the floor and buried his face in the blankets and pillows. Within a moment he was crying. Though he was crying silently so he could still hear if somebody came by or if somebody called him and so nobody would hear. But he cried, his entire body shaking with his sobs as he heaved out the tears. Gasping for breath as his heart broke yet again.

Couldn’t he just be loved for once in his life? Is that too much to ask?

[spacejew]

oops accidental personal post I guess

It's weird that I almost feel the need to go here to personal blog again because of a handful of irl friends following what was supposed to be a private personal Twitter in theory, just for like, idk, internet strangers and friends I made online not those imported from meatspace. Also those character limits... Suffocating.

Anyways yeah things are kinda stable but dissapointing lifewise? I'm definitely in a rut and stuck somewhere I'm desperately trying to get out of. Also like. idk. Gender shit. I think I really fucked myself over hard when I made the decision a few years back to conviously bottle up all my dysphoria and trans feelings and bury them and repress them hard and just live as a very gay and feminine bi boy and like. hm. I think I've been happy since? But im thinking now that maybe. Because that's still a part of my psyche that haunts me every day. I might actually have been mildly depressed this whole time and like, still struggling to make important life decisions because of the anxiety of that. Idk. Maybe if I got a therapist and realistic attention to that all those years ago and it turned out to be very real n legit and i got to make tough choices and live my truth, I would be equipped now to actually be joyful and able to fully focus on hard work and taking risks and putting myself out there and being successful and shit. Idk idk idk. I just have to wonder if all this time I've actually been quite unhappy and filling the void with dumb shit and a good deal of dissociation and complacency. Idk. what I'm saying is maybe I made a big mistake there lmao and could've started transitioning, if that's right for me, 4-7 years ago maybe, who knows. Haha so fun. Fuck me. Big Regrets, lads. But also I still don't know if that's right. Which probs means it is who am I kidding. Oof. But it's ok life is a journey I'm full of wise shit and I know it's not the end of the world. It just kinda. Makes me so sad on behalf of the old me who would cry so much because of dysphoria and living in this body in this life. She knew. I don't know why I buried her alive like that. Anyways.

I spent all year struggling to make an animated short (which ended up being kinda long tbh like 10 minutes?) by myself mostly, just me and my mental blocks and executive dysfunction and shit, but I was v passionate about it and worked hard and got to actually bring a whole vision to life, with basically nobody to tell me what to do, just give me feedback that I wasn't obligated to follow. It came out pretty nice and I'm very happy that I got to tell exactly the story I wanted and try a cool new look and I just wish I gave myself more time to work on the actual animation part but I put my heart and endless weeks and months of refinement into the storyboarding and script and every little detail and I really feel accomplished and like it paid off -- and I even got to do a private screening at my summer camp job that I was called in to do one more time at the last minute right when I finished my film, it was a miracle and so perfect, everyone cried and truly loved it and felt touched by it. And then I went to animation festivals! And all this cool shit! But... I haven't been able to figure out a public screening thing yet. And I feel like all my excitement is gone now. And I really wanted to polish the look and some backgrounds a little, just some very quick rerendering and comp, but. I feel like too much time has passed, i just feel dissapointed. I haven't put it online yet cause I haven't done my public screening, cause of my stupid anxiety about little details and overall idk imposter syndrome I guwss I feel more ashamed of it than proud of it even tho it's probably good, and like I feel that everyone was excited to support me but probably nobody cares anymore.

Basically I had all the wind taken out of my sails. Oh and right when I was trying to get it off the ground I guess and push through, my grandma died. I'm so heartbroken I loved her so fucking much and. She never got to see the film cause of my stupid bullshit. I feel so bad about that. So so bad. Ugh. And it's a film very very hilariously blatantly directly based on me and my feelings and my real family history, ultimately besides other main themes it's about talking to your grandparents and family about the past and your current feelings. And in it the main character, a girl, cough cough even though it's basically me, cough cough go figure, gender shit, anyways the climax is her going back in time to talk to her great grandma, and it's very emotional and my best friend of like almost 10 years now composed and recording a music for that scene for me. And now when I eventually screen this, my entire family and also myself is gonna get torn to shreds by this scene more than intended because my own fucking grandma, who I was excited to show this film to more than anyone on earth, passed so unexpectedly without seeing it. Fuck. Why didn't I send it to her when she was in the hospital? Obviously cause if I did that that would make it real and she wouldn't get better and all I do is live in denial. Ugh. Anyways yeah. The point is I'm stagnant and in a rut right now and just want to move forward and focus on making new work and just get a real career relevant job already. Tough year hit a well needed high and now petering off back into misery. Not to be dramatic. I'm ok tbh I have a part time I'm slowly getting sick of and a loving supportive partner and some very good friends, tho not as many as I used to see regularly and that's kinda sad too. That's your 20s babey.

I just need to move on and make big changes. My pattern rn is like. Work fri-sun, if I'm lucky I get to hang out with friends or lovers, usually at least with my partner. on monday I recover from working. on tuesday I have dnd and usually get some stuff done but honestly just catch up on warframe with my clan friends. wednesday my partner and I got to the park and library for half the day and eat and draw and talk. on thursday I mentally prepare for work again and usually we go out to play another roleplaying game with her roommates friends. a lot of that free time that's been left unmentioned is spent being over at bae's sometimes so I don't have the ability to get much work done. Lately I've spent most of my time planning a dnd campaign which is fun but also too stressful on account of obviously I'm not playing it yet so like what's the point, sorry friends who have patiently waited for months for me to be ready to start the game for them. And also like. Yeah idk. just sad and confused and resting my weary heart and body after a very rough month after my grandma passed. But! I did accomplish a very crazy deep cleaning of my room. I threw out 14 bags of shit at the least. I wish I weighed it all, it was a lot. I feel so much more organized and cleansed from that. For the record I didn't have any trash in my room, nor was it every a mess. Just every single cabinet and drawer was crammed full of stuff and I guess I hoarded a lot of shit. I was able to throw away a lot of things I held on to be cause of sentimentality and I'm proud of myself for growing that way. So like. Idk. It's not all bad, baby steps. I still feel like I'm constantly improving as a person! I'm positive, optimistic. Just tired, anxious, and feel bad.

Also I finally got a new phone and because of my hubris I dropped it without a case and it shattered only two weeks in. The day I was gonna buy a case. But it's ok. Story of my life I guess. I can't keep everything pristine and polished forever, one day shit falls and breaks but it's still usable. It has character.

I wasn't expecting to dump everything like this, sorry yall. Thanks for reading I guess. Also I forgot how to do a read more on mobile lol sorry

[legaciesmade]

maxence danet-fauvel. he/him. cismale. ╱ i thought i saw mathieu beaumont getting questioned by the police. the twenty-three year old is in their fourth year at west bridge studying business. they were at manon’s party because he’s her older brother and it was at their house. do you think they had something to do with her death? + a beguiling smile, a collection of luxury watches, the sound of running shoes on the track field.

hey you demon fucks .. i’m bailey !! i’m twenty-two, i go by she/her pronouns and i live in the b(est) timezone ;) if you wanna know more ab me, i’m a video game heaux and a pisces sun/aquarius moon/cancer rising ( for any fellow astro-hoes. ) also i’m not gonna lie, you’ll find me more readily on d.scord compared to t.mblr ims bcos... it’s easier, so hmu for tht if interested. anyw, mat is....certainly a new muse to me so i’m kinda just going with the flow. but what i do know is he’s fuckin trash. go figure.

his pinterest

the eldest child of the beaumont family; mathieu was basically groomed to one day take over the family business. it didn’t matter if he didn’t want it, he was the eldest and that was that.

so here he is, majoring in business ( with a bunch of math/finance courses on the side ) like a Good Son

literally he’s been taking classes to prepare him for college ever since the start of high school, maybe even earlier than that. because it’s a Very Serious Responsibility

to say he was envious that manon got to choose her own major/path in life is an understatement, but he’s learned well to hide his anger behind a smile,,,, thts so sad alexa play despacito

i’m leaving a lot of family stuff sorta open-ended bc i don’t want to assume too much ab manon aside from what we know thus far sjdhsjdh BUT JUST KNOW THAT, YEAH, MAT LOVES HIS FAMILY BUT....sometimes love isn’t enough. especially when you have like, basically NO say in a lot of aspects of your life...

his sport is literally the only thing that’s 100% his. his father would’ve probably preferred him to go out for football but... nah fam, boy wanted to do track and he’s crazy good. been doing it since middle school and each time he’s made captain position. dad still isn’t that impressed though.

that all being said. he’s also in student council; he enjoys it enough, but this was definitely more of a “you have to join it” scenario lol oops

his birthday is january 18th ( it must’ve been suuuuuuch a fun birthday this year, huh ;))))) i’m not sorry )

sun - capricorn ( restrictions, order, and control. you exercise these characteristics firstly on your own self. you like to control your reality by setting daily patterns to follow, and will frequently choose to wake up earlier than needed. you usually are stubborn and determined, and will frequently enter power games. however, you can be very patient. when this is combined with your determination and self-discipline, you can each any goal you set your mind to. )

moon - capricorn ( you show a lot of initiative. you are in it to win it. in fact, you might have a hard time kicking back and taking it easy. you do not want to feed into another’s beliefs about victimhood. you might experience issues of emotional detachment from other individuals, but this can prove very helpful; you can excel in things that require cold blood and seriousness. )

ascendant - aries ( you are athletic and active, highly energetic and capable of physical work. you are always ready to take initiative. self-reliance is learnt early in childhood. though you often have difficulties with your parents, especially the parent of the same sex. )

basically... his double capricorn aka his sense of maturity and seriousness, point to a very dutiful and hardworking nature... but, it also means that he had a lot of circumstances that forced him to grow up FAST. which, um, he did,,, in a sense. *points to his parents/his dad* we can blame them/him. HOWEVER, his aries rising/ascendant makes all that seriousness/logic tense af bc aries is like action/action/action... automatic response without thinking it through. so. that’s fun!!

alright so. the party and the pact. hm. mat’s in a very sticky situation with this whole thing and he still isn’t exactly sure how he feels ab it....but what’s done is done and there’s no going back now. of course he’s grieving in his own way, manon was still his little sister, but whew! seeing her like that really made him think of all the times they clashed/fought? like... yeah siblings fight okay but their different personalities/the clear difference in how their parents treated them, there was always a boiling point. no matter how quiet his negative emotions were, they were still there. sweet, naive manon... probably had no idea mathieu felt like this, because he just never fuckin talked ab it. and honestly, why would he?

in terms of what’s happening plot wise with the texts, etc, mat isn’t... okay he’s BOTHERED by them, but is he gonna let it show.... no. the fuck kinda question is tht...... he has enough to worry ab as is, keeping up with his courses and track and student council, not to mention his family and being the grieving brother,,, now someone’s sayin they KNOW what he helped do???? bye it’s not funny and he’s already exhausted. he’s v skeptical ab a lot of ppl in this so-called pact....but he knows most of them wouldn’t be out here tattling surely, when it’ll impact them just as much. *thinking emoji*

alright so idk what else to write atm like this is....Bad but. i tried okskjsk bye

[meanderfall]

thank you my love!! ^v^

(lmao i finally did it @solienna... it’s been like months but i finally completed this. also if you’re wondering, when i first tried to answer the original ask, it wouldn’t save any of what i’d written as a draft, so i just started a new post lol)

1. three songs that come up when you put your phone on shuffle

Flaws (acoustic) by Bastille

Wait For It from Hamilton

Here Comes the Rain Again by Eurythmics

3. three songs you were recently obsessed with

World in my Pocket by The Unlikely Candidates

The Darker the Weather, the Better the Man by MISSIO

Walk Me Home by P!NK

8. three songs that remind you most of summer and vacation

this is probably a weird choice but The Kids Aren’t Alright. I honestly don’t know why, it just gives me summer vibes.

Taste by Sleeping at Last (probably bc i listened to this A LOT while playing stardew valley and stardew gives me summer vibes)

Young Volcanoes by Fall Out Boy

(this section was so hard.... there are like 0 songs that i actually associate with summer and vacation. literally the only way i do is if i discover said song and listen to a lot around the time summer starts)

11. three favourite songs from movie or TV series soundtrack

What’s Up Danger By Blackway & Black Caviar

I’m Still Standing by Taron Egerton

The Cyborg Fights (Genos’ theme from One-Punch Man. It’s an instrumental piece, and it goes off).

12. three favourite songs from video games

i fucking hate you adri, so much, i never listen to video game soundtracks, you fool, i have nothing to offer you

Klavier’s theme from Ace Attorney! Called Guilty Love lmao

I played Night in the Woods recently, and I think my two favourite pieces were Astral Alley (it plays during a dream sequence and i literally fucked around doing nothing for a bit just to listen to this. It’s so peaceful, but there’s something also... wistful or sad about it, that i just love.) 

and Dusk Stars! (That one plays while stargazing with a professor as a sidequest and tbh it was one of my favourite parts of the game. Surprisingly wholesome, and the last bit really struck a cord with me.)

13. three songs you want at your funeral

Saturn by Sleeping at Last

I Lived by One Republic

Pieces by Harbor and Home (low-key this song is practically a narrative for my life and for once it’s just comforting)

14. three songs you want at your wedding

Bright by Echosmith

Lovesong by Adele

Meaning of Life by Kelly Clarkson

(i don’t.... listen to happy love songs.... i was just going through my library of romantic songs and i was like “this is too pop, this is too angsty, this is pre-relationship, etc. etc”.)

15. three songs you want to dance with your love to

Fly Me to the Moon

Turn Time Off

Anna Sun by Walk the Moon (tbh this song gives me a very specific image of like moving into a new home with my lover and this song is playing while we’re unpacking, or even just any high energy song, and we end up pausing unpacking long enough to dance silly together and sing the song and it ends with us like hugging with a peck for good measure and life seems so good and perfect)

18. three songs that remind you of your best friend

Budapest (legit bc she showed me this song and was like “i think you would like this!” and you bet your ass i would love that song even if it was trash)

Another Night on Mars

Trouble is a Friend by Lenka (why? i legitimately don’t know. Especially since she’s the sweetest and most peaceful person ever. Then again she is a junkrat main.... never mind it makes sense)

19. three songs that are your guilty pleasure

Waters of Megalovania

Jessie’s Girl (this is like. the quintessential chad complaining about being friend-zoned, but i jam out to it every time, and im sucker for jealousy and unrequited love)

I Don’t Even Care About You by MISSIO for the days when im angry or having a bad day or more annoyed than usual at people trying to interact with me, and I just want to indulge in my old cynicism and hatred of the world in general

20. three songs that remind you of the person who sends this one

False Confidence by Noah Kahan

Hate That You Know Me by the Bleachers

Happy by Marina and the Diamonds

21. three songs of your childhood

oh boy adri, i was an angsty kid. I also tried to keep this specifically to songs I listened to before the age of ten just bc in my head my childhood was pretty much from the ages 3 to ~9, and honestly corresponds to a very specific period in my life

Because of You by Kelly Clarkson

Pieces by Sum 41

Unwritten by Natasha Bedingfield

22. three songs you listen to when you’re sad

All We Do by Oh Wonder

All the King’s Horses by Karmina

SoLow by Keegan Calmes

(this selection was actually hard bc there are... a surprising amount tbh and that probably isnt a good thing lol)

23. three songs that never fail to get you pumped up

How Far We’ve Come by Matchbox Twenty

High on Humans by Oh Wonder

Shut Up and Dance by Walk the Moon (to the surprise of exactly no one. This song came out five years ago and it’s STILL my feel good song, even when i feel terrible)

(this was also a hard choice because i got so many feel good, pump me up songs as well, which i guess??? balances out the amount of sad songs i know and love??)

24. three favourite old songs

lmao how old are we talking here? early 2000s? before that? 1950s? i’ll just go with some goodies

Addicted to Love by Robert Palmer (OKAY SO. this is low-key an all-time favourite of mine and that i relate(d) to a LOT as the person he’s singing about.)

Africa by Toto (damn fucking right im putting it adri!!!)

For What It’s Worth by Buffalo Springfield

26. three favourite non-English songs

Alles Neu by Peter Fox (for once not a lyrics video, bc the official video is part of the Experience for this song)

The Narrow Street by Shin-Yong Woo (aka Jumin’s voice actor. This is simultaneously a huge mood, and gives me feels for my husband)

Little Traveler by clear (the only vocaloid song i know! im truly a sucker for The Little Prince though, the novel that inspired this song)

(be proud of me adri, this section could’ve been nothing but japanese songs, a good portion just from anime.)

29. three songs that influenced you most (some songs change or save lives)

im not gonna lie, a lot of these songs were kind of taken by the childhood ones but lemme see if i can scrounge up any others

In a Big Country by Big Country

Stand by Rascal Flatts

Better Get to Livin’ by Dolly Parton

(As you know, I listen to the first one A LOT, pretty much every time I get into sad mood and want some comfort, but the other two, i sort of forget about, even though i remember these songs being super important to me when i was younger. And re-listening to these now is... kind of crazy tbh, and bringing up all sorts of memories. I will say, perhaps i should give younger me more credit for how hard she was trying to heal and be a better person, just based on these songs lol)

30. three songs you really want your followers to know (for reasons other than all those above)

Lemme see, im gonna give you guys some songs that I internally categorize as late night songs. The songs that make you feel like you’re listening to it at 2 am on a Saturday night, and reality feels just a little bit shifted, and everything feels deeper, more meaningful

Sloppy Seconds by Watsky

Shrike by Hozier

Hurricane by Reuben and the Dark

Sunflower by Post Malone, Swae Lee

+Bonus. Three songs I can listen to, no matter what my mood

Muscle Memory (Acoustic) by Lights. No joke, even on days where i feel like any song is going to irritate the fuck out of me and im sick of listening to music and the emotions they evoke, i can listen to this and immediately feel better

It’s Alright by Mother Mother (legit whenever it shows up in my recommended i smash that mf play button no matter what. it’s like one of, if not the only, song that matches the screaming in my head.)

You’re Somebody Else by flora cash (same as the two above tbh)

[kvothe-kingkiller]

wtf is Nephelai

aight so if you’ve been following me for a bit you probably have Noticed me posting about the Thing I am writing which is called Nephelai.

so I thought I’d give a lil primer on it just for uhhh fun? I guess?

anyways. if you want it in a sentence its ‘gays out-science the competition’

if you want a little bit More info than that 4-5 word (depending on ur opinions on hyphens) blurb, here u go. I will put her under the cut so it does not clutter up the dashes of anyone who isn’t into this kinda thing. I am shit at brevity so this in itself is kinda long.

Just as far as vague genre/feeling stuff goes, it’s a sci fi and it kinda combines adventure with slice of life? Idk man. Its very much character based and a lot of it is dialogue. If you’re looking for pretty, poetic writing you’re not gonna find it here, I tend to just get to the point lol. It deals with some pretty heavy/dark stuff but I will tell you upfront that the ending is happy. There’s too many dark edgy books that end sad. Plus we don’t have enough gay stories that end well. It’s also quite R rated, though more in the violence/sweary way than the sexy way. 

Given that it does deal with some Rough Shit (child abuse, racism, depression, etc.) I have a list of all the chapters and their possible triggers here. (its at the bottom of the post)  I just put in general things but if you have a specific/more obscure trigger I would be happy to inform you if/where it shows up.

Also, just so you know, this fucker is Long. its at 180+K and I still haven’t gotten all the chapters out yet. As well as that, this is essentially a first draft. I know its slow to start and choppy in some places but currently Im just trying to get it out, and uploading the chapters as I go gives me incentive to do that, cause otherwise I’d never even get the first draft done. Basically I write a chapter, check for spelling and grammar mistakes, miss most of them because grammar is my kryptonite, then upload it. I will be editing it a Lot in the future. 

anyways.

Setting

The story is set in our universe in The Future. How far in the future? don’t ask because I don’t know. I don’t want a 2001 space odyssey situation. A lot of the technological advancements would take wildly different times to achieve so I don’t want to put a number on it especially because we are very bad at predicting how fast things will advance. It is at Least 150 years I’d say.

Humans have moved on from earth and colonized new planets. They’re still on earth, it’s just that they’re also in other places. Namely Mars and proxima centauri B which has been renamed Salus to keep up with the whole roman god thing (she’s the goddess of safety). Both planets have colonies from multiple different countries. Not all countries, I mean lets be real lichtenstein isn’t colonizing mars anytime soon. The two american colonies on both planets are Lincoln (Mars) and Roosevelt (Salus). The way that people travel between these planets which are v far away is through electromagnetic radiation powered engines and the use of man made wormholes. Let’s ignore relativity and pretend that when you get close to the speed of light your timeline Doesn’t slow down because I don’t want to deal with that.

However, those planets are not where most of the book takes place. The main planet they are on is Nephelai (shocker I know.) It is a planet with a small research colony on it. Before the colony was put in place, it was a barren planet with some water that was in the zone for life, and just didn’t have any. They terraformed the fuck out of it so the atmosphere is the same as earths then installed a Beyersdorf around it. A beyersdorf is basically a time machine. Anything inside it will have it’s timeline sped up. Uses some black hole jiggery pokery I don’t want to explain because it would be... impossible. Anyways, they placed some organic molecules on it and sped it up until life evolved then slowed it back down to normal time to go in and observe. It has tall mountains and a surface that is so hot that water boils. So all of the life lives up in the clouds around the peaks. Most of it is adapted for life in the air. Such as: giant borzois with wings and living blimps that are basically guppies. Its very cold and people have to have specialized gear to go outside.

Plot

I don’t want to go too much into the plot because... thats why you Read books, but I’ll give my best summary. Basically the main character, Nadia, is getting her masters in evolutionary biology and has to do a year long research project. She goes with her professor, Brenley, to Nephelai to do the project. While there, the planet is invaded by uhhhh neo nazis (whoops) and they basically create a hostage situation that is very hard to get out of in order to get the third main, Krupin, a celebrity trash man, to work for them and make some very dangerous biological weapons that his company’s products would be able to produce. Obviously they don’t want this to happen so they have to come up with a plan to escape. However a lot of what happens is more based around the emotional toll it takes to be trapped for so long with no contact to the outside world and the uncertainty of whether they’re gonna make it out or not.

Characters

Alright so now the characters. As I said, this is very much character based. So its more about their interactions than anything else really. Again, lotta dialogue.

Nadia Waters

She is as said before, the main character. A 23 year old dork who is a complete nerd (they all are). She is bi and also a bit of a disaster, naturally. Quite smart but doesn’t think she is, very loyal to the friends she has, and can be a bit shy at first. She is also stupidly brave to the point where its a problem. Her need for adrenaline is Real and she does very stupid things to get it. She describes herself at one point as “just a grad student with a very poor sense of self preservation.” While she doesn’t go looking for fights she will definitely stand up for herself and others and throw down against people who could very easily kill her.

Elias Brenley

Nadia’s professor, also a dork, also a nerd. A lanky french weirdo with an obsession for physics and a love for 80s music. Very spontaneous and doesn’t give a shit about embarrassing himself. He has aspergers and even though he is very smart and can do some savant-like tricks, that isn’t the only aspect of his personality (what a novel idea...) He Also isn’t just a ‘robot’, he cares a lot about others, especially those who don’t mind his quirks. Also I took the expected subplot of ‘male professor gets with female student’ and threw it in the garbage where it belongs cause he’s gay as hell. He and Nadia do become very close but it is 100% platonic

Feliks Krupin

Also a nerd, also gay (seeing a pattern?). He is pretty much a public figure as he owns one of the biggest biotech companies out there, Vozmet. Kinda like if you took elon musk and removed the asshole-ness. Annoyingly perfect in every way, charming, pretty, v smart, all those. Struggles with a good amount of mental stuff that most of the world doesn’t know about and came from a pretty shitty background. Him and Brenley have some History though at the beginning of the story they haven’t seen each other in 9 years. Tends to be noble to a fault and will sacrifice himself for basically anyone. 

Some other characters who aren’t the main three:

Kristina: The president of Vozmet to Krupin’s CEO and his best friend. About five foot nothing and has the appropriate amount of concentrated rage. She’s not mean, she just doesn’t let anyone push her around and knows how to get what she wants. 

Heidi: One of the only sane ones. Was determined by others to be the leader of the hostages so to speak and has Way too much on her plate. Is often the one voice of sanity or the one to actually get the others to stay on task

James: Drinks that respect women juice all day every day. Very nice. Doesn’t deserve this situation. Has a bit of a thing for Nadia.

Scott: Is the other only sane one along with Heidi. The doctor of the group who almost acts as a father figure to all of them even though he’s not That much older than some of them.

Saoirse: Dumb irish lesbian. ‘Nuff said. 

Links

so if you like the sound of any of that you can find it on 

fictionpress: 1 2 3 4 5 6 7 8 9 10 11 12 13 14 15 16 17 18

or AO3 here

if u took the time to read this massive post, and/or read some, I luv u. *mwah*

[ofdasoms]

     ┅ ☆ ★ ✮ ∟ ‖ park sooyoung (joy). 22. cisfemale. she/her. ‖ — ripped black tights, poker face permantely on show, always playing with fire. 」did you hear that JANG ‘DAISY’ DA-SOM is planning on attending the next race ?! i won’t lie, i’m pretty excited to see their MIDNIGHT PURPLE 2014 CHEVROLET CAMARO SS in person. i know people say they’re really COMPETITIVE, HARD-WORKING & ENDEARING, but don’t you think they come off way too IMPULSIVE , SINGLE-MINDED & HOT-HEADED ? i hear they’re always blasting THROW A FIT by TINASHE ? oh well, they’re a member of the HELLCATS so i guess i shouldn’t complain.

ok so,,,, dasom is the perfect example of not judging a book by its cover,, bc she looks sweet as hell and can sometimes look innocent, but shes far from it sdkfgjh

her family life was pretty great growing up. both of her parents were teachers and her older brother and sister were pretty much the angels of the family,, and dasom was always looked down upon. she wasn’t as smart as them, and she certainly wasn’t as friendly as them either.

her parents knew she was a problem ever since she was younger --- she was five years old when she had been sent home four times in one week for hitting someone or for losing her temper, and it ultimately resulted in her having to transfer schools.. something that happened all the way up into high school

she was fifteen when she was expelled from her fourth high school, and having attended and been kicked out of all the nearby schools, dasom was sent off to boarding school. her parents were truly hoping that it would straighten her out and that she’d stop being a brat,,, but it truly didn’t work. the only reason she hadn’t been kicked out was the fact her parents were paying a whoooole lot of money to keep her there.

nevertheless, she graduated early at seventeen and left with a diploma and a boyfriend. he was the one to show her this whole new life,, and the one who introduced her to drugs and using sex to get whatever the hell she wanted. he didn’t stick around for long considering dasom was trash and cheated on him once she realised she was also hella into girls. though he didn’t know that at the time -- the only reason he split up with her was because he caught her talking to some guy on a sugar daddy website,,,,, bc yes dasom is tHAT type of girl

she loves luxury, she loves money,,, and she’s always needed someone to help and supply that for her. (wc??? maybe idk)

it wasn’t until that she was introduced and discovered more about the hellcats that she started becoming more independent. she started realising how powerful she could be --- and not through just using her body. she started using her brain more, started being more strategic.. and started loving being deceptive eVEN MORE

oKAY SO she’s now a drug dealer and dancer for the hellcats bc she still likes that thrill of having all the eyes on her but she ultimately likes doing business more than anything

on top of being a dealer,, and a decent one at that, she’s a pretty good pickpocket!! so like,,,, pls watch ur wallet, phone and watches around her,, bc she has no morals

speaking of having no morals,, she’s v competitive and loves the rivalry between gangs, but like get a good few drinks in her and sHE will open up to anybody!! she’s prob slept with a few kings members on few occasions, but u bet ur ass she’s most likely going to ignore them or really not remember who they are

massive flirt,,, which i mentioned all ready. she will 100% drop a cringy ‘is that right, oppa?’ to get what she wants as usual ASDJFHHJDS

only rlly cares about herself unless ur on her good side

will fight ANYBOD Y even tho shes only 120lbs,, like if ur 6′4′’ and been boxing for years??? shes still ready to throw hands

if something happens to her car??? you know she’s just going to beg somebody to help her fix it

but ultimately shes just got a big heart for those she loves and cares about bc she needs that human interaction considering how many people shes fucked over in the past asdkfgjhedf

for being a bAD BITCH,,, shes hella emotional so ya good luck with that

smol wanted connections suggestions??:

people she can tolerate?? so like people from hellcats who shes like ‘uh ur cool ig’

give me that good friend(s) of hers?? she prob considers them a best friend bc she aint got much and no fam to love except for the gang so,,, ya

she hates a whole lot of people too so that could either be from the hellcats or kings idk

ur typical fwb plot,, and again,,,, no morals daisy over here will sleep with anybody from hellcats or even kings,,

she’s a dancer so??? has she caught ur muses eye before and we can bounce from that??

anybody she deals to

has she gotten in trouble with ur muse before?? has she pickpocketed them and gotten caught??

she hates a lot of people, but surely people hate her guts too so give me that relationship!!!

idk,,,, i’ll prob make a better wc page in the future but thats all i can think of for now!!! pls feel free to message me and im v excited to write with yall 💖

[dreammutual-remade]

idol!you and lucas

request: please do a bullet scenario about lucas and his gf both being sm idols - anon

word count: 2.6k 

a/n: first of all,,,, this gif hurts me badly, seCOND OF ALL im so sorry for the inactivity !!  I have finals this week and I graduate really soon n ive just been v busy !!! also I had hella writers block trying to finish this ish up but I hope u like it anon !!!!its a lil hard for me to write as an idol just because thats such a Wildt lifestyle but I did my best ily

warnings: cursing n also some crying because god knows all of our boys prolly have during their idol days :(((((((

what’s up butter cup

let’s dive tf in

as a pre-warning thingy i’m making you a singer so i’m very sorry if you can’t sing i can’t either bby

alright so this story begins when you’re not even 16 years old and you audition for a bunch of companies

tbh you didn’t think you were /that/ good at singing or dancing but ???

all the companies wanted you??? you got offers from JYP and SM and Pledis ????? go off queen

we stan

anyways

you decide to go with SM since they produced leGENDS SHINEE

FUCK I LOVE THOSE GUYS

(binch if u went to JYP u literally could have been in TWICE ?!?/&.&. ABSOLUTE LEGENDS UR LOSS THOT)

also because you just think that’ll be best for you ?? idk we don’t judge here (i already did though i’m So Sorry)

on your first day as a trainee you’re in search of the female dorms and you just can’t find them

eventually you run into this,,,, Gang Of Adolescent Boys

they’re wearing dorky ass muscle tees and keep saying shit about “foreign swaggers”

(.... y’all already know who it is sjdkdkd)

and you’re Meek and New and Small so you’re like um, hellowherearethegirlsdormsplease

okay there’s four of them and they’re all fckin huge except for one

the Biggest One with the american accent points you in the right direction and you try to scurry away but end up smacking into the Second Biggest One’s arm because he moved in your way on accident ouchie

“god lucas why don’t you just run the poor girl over”

“hYUNG PLEASE”

“hehehhehe i’m just kiddin”

and you just kind of mumble that it’s fine and go on your way

okay so you train for three yEARS before your debut

and you def come out of your shell alright like you’re Extroverted and whatnot

you still see those boys and even make friends with mark and donghyuck and the Foreign Members

but the entirety of the group you met has debuted except Lucas

you’re not close but you wave and say hi when you see each other

you turn pink everytime from Emotions and also Holding Your Breathe Due To Anxiety

and he was cute years ago but he’s only gotten prettier with age dude

they recently dyed his hair to give him some Blonde Stuff and he looks reaLLY GOOD

LIKE TO THE POINT WHERE U HAVE TROUBLE LOOKING HIM IN THE EYE

but eventually you’re like hey now i’m a grown woman i can handle this giant childish man !!! quit that @ emotions

alright so you debut like, days before him no lie

you’re a solo artist bc idk

red velvet was full 😔🤟

anyways you’ve been filming the video for the past couple weeks and the concept is sort of filmy and shimmery like old sparkly anime water u kno ?

and you’re wearing similar stuff to what ten was wearing in the new heroes mv (BIG OOF) except less warm toned ?

like swishy sort of see through white shirts and spandex underneath

you’re a Beautiful and Skilled dancer so they have u all over the place with this choreo

on the FLOOR on the WALL in the AIR

no joke they had you in a harness doing cool swirly shit in the air this is the stuff of legends my g

but like the inside of SM ? is very cold

if you’re not filming you’re bundled up in a blanket and trying to rub the goosebumps out of your arms and legs

because you have to look all smooth and flawless for filming and those are two things goosies are not

luckily the song wasn’t a huge ballad because it’s rather hard to belt out long ass notes when you’re upside down lmao

anyways, the song is a bop and the mv is beautiful and you are wearing minimal clothing and although these are all nice things but also

RECIPE FOR DISASTER

the filming is almost done thank GOD

you’re taking a break from filming and you go out in the hall in your costume to go get another water bottle because ain’t nobody around to give a pre debut thot a water bottle 🤧🤧

your arms are wrapped around yourself when lucas jogs up behind you and throws his jacket around you??

literally throws it like you made an oof noise

“um ,? thank you that was aggressive”

“i knOw i’m sorry it’s just you are practically naked and it’s Cold in here and also walking behind you i noticed you were Very Exposed sO”

you turn bright red because that means everyone has seen your ass prolly and you duck your head and pull the jacket tighter around yourself

“oh! i’m sorry i mean you look uhh? really good ?? yeah you look good nOT that i was looking super hard or anything or that i uH saw aNything BUt if i did it would look good i’m sure nOT THAT I thInK about that ?$/&/“

and now you’re both blushing very hard but you feel a little better when you see he’s just as flustered as you

you brush your fingers on his forearm to get him to stop staring at the floor and tell him thanks and ask about when he’s debuting

he tells you the mv filming is done since they had to go Real Far Away to do it and get it done ahead of time and that the teasers will be out in three weeks and then the mv release and then its Show Time Baby

you’re excited for him and he’s excited and you debut really soon as well and he’s excited for you and !!!!!

there’s excitement all over the place

he’s smiling so big and his eyes are cute and crinkly and :(((((

you still got a crush on him /sigh/

one of the staff literally yells your name down the hall and you’re like aw shit that’s my cue lol

you leave him with with a lil squeeze of his bicep and you’re BOTH shook

him because ?? was that fLIRTING

you because ?? THAT WAS FLIRTING

also because his biceps are thicc i’m gonna cry

big baby stands there for like 3 mins just shook and with uwus oozing from his pores

you skrt very quickly to avoid the consequences of your actions and get back to filming

okay TIME SKIP

your mv was released and did GOOD AS FUCK

you didn’t hear it from me but lucas + nct boys were seen on vlive jamming the fuck out to your song

you’re backstage like 10 mins from going on and having an absolute panic attack

what if you trip ??? or your voice breaks !!:&::

what if all the reviews say you’re Trash live and that the mv was better since they edited

what if you FLOP AND HAVE NO FANS

NO ONE DOES THE FANCHANTS

FUCK FUXKFUCKFUXKCUDJ

so you do call the king of debuts

mark lee

and you’re like mARK FUCK IM GOING TO CRASH AND BURN PLEAS LLSSE DHELPD ME

he tells you to Calm The Fuck Down and assures you it’ll be fine but it’s not working and mark is but a young boy he don’t know how to deal with FEMALES

you hear some deep ass voice on the other side ask who’s on the phone and mark says your name and then the voice is closer and deMANDING to be given the phone

u already kno it’s our boy yukhei

he can hear you gasping through the phone and having a mental breakdown and immediately makes his voice all low and soft

wow i’m , affected writing this shit

“hey, y/n, listen to me, you’re okay, you’re fine. i promise it’ll be okay.”

“bUT WHAT IF I-“

“you won’t. you’ve worked too hard and practiced too much. i know you i saw you do it. do NOT let all of that go down the drain. you can do this. now get your cute ass out there and take NO SHIT”

“i know but i am, scared”

“don’t be! this is what you love isnt it?”

“i mean,,,, yeah”

“and you want to do this more than anything don’t you?”

“well , yeah”

“then for gods sake don’t be a wimp and do it”

“hey i miss the part of this conversation where you were being nice to me”

“that part’s over babe you need some TOUGH LOVE now please for me and for yourSELF get out there”

“okay.. thanks lucas”

“anything for you, angel”

yOU HANG UP SO QUICK

how dare he

you were all Comforted but then he went on with that angel bullshit

okay long story short you ended the industry dude

all solo artists BOW BEFORE YOU

VOCAL QUEEN

DANCE QUEEN

lucas: shaking because His Angel did so well and you were wearing white and actually looked like an angel

but you don’t see him for the next like twO MONTHS because he’s promoting boss and you’re promoting your single and neither of you are home ever

when you do get a second to yourself you try to send him an encouraging text but

you seldom get a second to yourself :(((

he does the same thing and they’re so sweet :(

“good morning i hope u slept well !!”

“princess don’t forget 2 hydrate”

“i saw ur mnet performance u looked beautiful <333”

this man is practically begging you to wife him up i mean

he’s cute

he’s BIG and WARM

very sweet to you :(

talented and lovely

absolute dweeb

supportive of you even from great distances

BEST BOY UWU

you try to be just as encouraging back because he deserves it UGH

“bub don’t forget to eat i know ur hungry rn”

“!!!!!! you came foR MY LUNGS WITH THAT CENTER DANCE AT THE END BOI”

“why are u sending me messages u need to rest bby :((“

when things calm down though you,, see each other

he doesn’t formally ask you out and you don’t say anything but, youre dating sort of kind of

as idols you’re both still so so busy and you JUST debuted so neither of you are really allowed to date anyways

you settle for little bits of cuddling and secret touches as you pass each other in the hall

you both stand outside of your respective dorms at night to facetime without waking your dorm mates

he desperately wants to go on dates and do Normal Couple things but there’s no time :(

the most affectionate you’ve ever been is when the girl group who shares a dorm with you was out promoting and you had him over and you took a nap together :((((

he Insisted upon being the big spoon and basically wrapped your whole body up with his limbs

pressed a few lil kisses to the back of your neck and your shoulder when he thought you were asleep

you weren’t though and you turned around to kiss him on the cheek and then tuck your face into his neck and pass tf out

he has to leave though because mark texts him and is like YO I KNO UR WITH Y/N AND HER ROOMMATES ARE ON THE WAY HOME

ABORT MISSION DUDE

and that’s pretty much it :(

months pass without much between you even though you’re trying your best

and even though you live in dorms you’re still so lonely especially when you’re traveling because you don’t have any group members

you don’t want to annoy or worry lucas though so you don’t complain

he notices though and late at night he’ll call you while you’re in bed and talk about his day and how he misses you and wishes you were there

and when you get all emo he says he’ll be waiting for you at the airport

(he really does he goes and hides in the bathroom and texts you so you can go in there and TACKLE HIM)

he still calls you angel all the time :((((

god that’s another weakness of mine ??? IM SUCH A WUSS

but it has specifically changed to “my angel”

uwu

your first kiss and first Real Confession happens on the Worst Day Of Your Life

you’re about to go on stage (you’ve released an album since your debut so this is new stuff) when you get a call from your mom ??

she’s crying and tells you your grandma is sick and in the hospital and it’s really bad

immediately you’re barely holding yourself together because that woman half raised you and was the reason you stayed in dance and worked so hard to become who you are today

there are tears streaming down your face already and the makeup team is fluttering around you trying to fix what you’re messing up and it’s bad

you still have to go on though so you go and perform with tears in your eyes and your manager yells at you after for not pulling it together

you go home in tears and then you’re not looking where you’re going and ran straight into a staff who yells at you some more for being some entitled idol brat

originally you weren’t gonna say anything to lucas but, the staff pushed you over the edge and you call him in tears and are incoherent and can barely tell him where you are before you hang up

our boy BURSTS into your room and sees you sitting on the floor with your face buried in your knees and 🚨🚨🚨🚨🚨🚨 !!

he gathers you in his arms and sits on the bed with you curled up on his lap

he holds you close and rubs a comforting hand up and down your back at the same time as he frantically tries to figure out what’s wrong

“y/n?? baby what’s wrong? angel, please you gotta tell me or i cant help”

“i jjJJUST Got a cALL and my grandMA IS SICK AND THEN I DI D BAD AND DISAPPOINTED EVERYONE AND My mManageR yeYELLED at me and theN I RAN iNtO a staffF meMbEr and he yELled at me too and I JSUT .$:&:&;& i’m sO SORRY u doNT need to deAL WIYH ME you have problems of YouR own and-“

“shhh listen to me i always care about you okay? angel, i want to help you no matter what you know that. also, if you weren’t so distraught i would go beat some SM ass you didn’t deserve to be yelled at :(((( how about we call your mom and check for updates with your grandma and i’ll stay here with you for the night?”

you nod and then reach for your phone while keeping as much physical contact with lucas as possible

he’s the only reason you haven’t reached the Depression Point Of No Return so

we stayin close

you put your mom on speaker and set your phone down before squishing yourself back into his chest and sniffling while the phone rings

your mom answers and you shakily ask for any updates and she tells you not much but your grandma has improved and they think that within a couple weeks she’ll be better

you cry some more and tell her you love them both and you’re so relieved and lucas kisses the crown of your head and is just There For Comforting

once you hang up and you’ve calmed down a little more you back up a little and turn to face him

“hey thank you so much, you didn’t have to come and help me so much but you’ve always been there to make me stop Freaking Out and laugh and i just, love you. yeah that’s what it is. I LOVE YOU I AM IN LOVE WITH YOU, WONG YUKHE-“

he cuts you off by snatching your face in his big warm hands and kissing you right on the lips

he then kisses your nose and your forehead and pulls you back into his lap to tuck you under his chin

“it’s all for you, angel ;)))) i love you more”

[yourhappypappypatton]

97 logicality please? Ur awesome at writing BTW

#97: It just… hurtsPairing: Platonic LogicalityWord Count: 1123Warnings: Ex boyfriend, crying, feelingsSummary: the breakup has been hard.. just maybe not on the side you were expecting.

It had been a few weeks since Moving On parts 1 and 2 had been filmed, and things had more or less gone back to normal in the mindscape. Roman and Patton seemed to have gotten over the breakup easier and faster than they would have if Thomas hadn’t summoned them and made them talk over everything. Not that he would ever admit it, but that was a relief to Logan. He didn’t know what the more emotional sides would want- or even need- to hear at times such as that.

Despite not understanding the deep feelings that the others are prone to feeling, Logan had noticed a tightness in his chest and a slight exhaustion within himself throughout the past few days. It was odd. It was almost as if logic had been stripped away from himself in nearly infinitesimal sections. He would not notice that the weight was there, replaced by emotion if he was not as incredibly perceptive as he was.

The most frightening part about this newest development is that Logan cried the other night. Late at night, he felt the tightness swell in his chest, and he finally understood what it meant to have to swallow the lump in your throat. It was fascinating, yes, but it was also overwhelming and he could not stop thinking about Thomas’ ex boyfriend. He was stuck in his room, silent tears rolling down his cheeks, said tears blurring his vision. The happy memories of the relationship and the nights spent together running through his head.

Logan stood from his desk, and walked the short distance to his bed. As silly as it may sound, those few steps felt incredibly long. Logan practically collapsed onto his bed, and hugged a  pillow close to his chest. The steady stream of tears turned into something larger as he continued to think over the times that used to be. Soon enough, Logan could think of nothing aside from him. He was attempting to repress his sobs and he pressed his face into the pillow, ignoring the way it made his glasses press into his face. The slight pain from hs glasses frames was nice, it was grounding… and above everything else, he wasn’t sure that he could summon enough energy to take them off. Fascinating. Is this truly the kind of turmoil that Patton has to suffer through every day?

Is this truly the kind of turmoil inside Patton that he decides to bottle up, and hold within himself until it simply becomes too much and he has no choice but to break down? Logan truly wasn’t aware of what strength his fellow side possessed until now… and speaking of his fellow side, Patton was walking up the stairs, humming a simple little tune as he did so. He paused by the logical side’s door, and knocked in a ‘shave and a haircut’ pattern before speaking. “Hey, Lo! I just fixed up some dinner! I was thinking we could just do some simple PB and J tonight, does that sound good to you?” no answer. How peculiar! Logan almost always answered his door. Patton hadn’t even received an affirmative, or even a flippant “One moment, Patton.” Patton furrowed his eyebrows in concern. Maybe a different tactic would be more effective!

“Hey, Lo, if you don’t come quick, Ro might finish off all the strawberry Crofter’s before you can even get a taste of it!” Patton bounced anxiously on his heels as he listened intently… nothing. Patton could feel the smile slip off of his cheeks at the lack of response. Surely, Logan would tell him if something was wrong or if he was taking a nap, right? “Logan? I’m coming in. I’m worried about you.” Patton opened the door, and made a sympathetic whine in the back of his throat as he saw the sight before him.

Logan was facing the door on his side, nose red and running buried in one of his galaxy-pillowcase clad pillows, a steady stream of tears dripping onto the pillow and the comforter below him. Upon seeing Patton, Logan sat up, discarding the pillow as quickly as possible. He sniffed a few times and rubbed his nose harshly before roughly wiping his cheeks free of any tears. He reached underneath his glasses to ensure maximum dryness of face before attempting to speak with Patton. He cleared his throat awkwardly. “Good evening, Patton,” he winced at how dry and gravelly his voice sounded. He could give Virgil a run for his money. “How are you fairing?”

Patton didn’t seem to be falling for it. He knelt down by his bed and took Logan’s trembling hands in his own. Logan was determined not to look into Patton’s eyes, sternly keeping them locked onto his lap. “I.. apologise, Patton. I should have warned you before exposing you to such an-” he paused  briefly to find the right words “Emotional display. I shall ensure that it doesn’t happen again.”

Logan could hear Patton sigh, and he couldn’t help but agree. He was disappointed in himself, too. He could see a tear hit the lens of his glasses. “Logan, please look at me.” Logan waited a few moments, took a breath, and then met Patton’s eyes. Instead of finding disgust, and disappointment as he was expecting, Logan found nothing but love and understanding in those brown eyes. “Logan, I want it to happen again. Showing your emotions is healthy.”

Logan nearly snorted. “Weren’t you just hiding your own feelings for our sake.”Patton put a finger to his lips with a soft laugh. “We’re not talking about that right now, Lo.” the emotional side suddenly became serious once more. “I want to know what’s wrong. Please, let me in.”

Logan bit his lip and retracted his hands from Patton’s in order to push his glasses up his nose. It helped ground him in a way. “I was… thinking about the recent breakup Thomas and… all of us had to endure, and suddenly I couldn’t stop it from happening. I began to… to cry, Patton. I could not stop thinking about him, and how happy Thomas was with him, and it just… hurts. I haven’t the slightest clue how to make these feelings go away and how to become myself once more.” Patton had moved beside him on the bed and began to rub his back. “Well, Lo, I think the best thing you can do in this situation is just what I told Thomas. One step in front of the other. Soon enough, you’ll go back to your own smart, logical, rational self, but for now,” Patton paused “Don’t be afraid to feel things. I’ll be here every step of the way with you.”

(A/N) HA! I MADE LOGAN FEEL FEELINGS! remember, even if you’re not comfortable with it yet, feeling your feelings is v v v important. Don’t hide what you’re feeling from others. Also, I hope you don’t mind that I made it platonic. I really can’t see Logicality any other way ¯\_(���)_/¯ If you want to send me a prompt, click here! 

Taglist taken from LJ’s Editable Taglist Spreadsheet

@emokittenlikesgore@completelyclevername@urtrashhq@too-random-for-me@deathbyvenusftw@ill-interested@just-another-transblog@tree4life25@tsfanart@johnnyboylaurens@ams-parker@staticsanders@panicatthefalloutphanficphandom@allthemetalsoftherainbow@depressed-alone@theroyalramen@hikariyukino@magicmapleleaf @pieces-of-annedrew@saphirestrike@asalwayss@romanssippycup@virgils-anxiety@redundant-statements-for-400@skylagamingfea@clueingforblogs@ladynikitablack@fairly-close@dibleopard@haikyuupaladin@all-these-trees-stealing-mah-o2@migraine-marathon@alextheodd@sandersfanders @pansexual-cat@hanramz-the-fander@anastasialestina@darude-sanderstorm@sanders-sides-shambles @royallyanxious@thestoryofme13@madelynnaa@i-will-physically-fight-you@a-blog-just-for-sanders@trashfireiplier@the-optimism-of-the-ostriches@callboxkat@kurna-kovite@221biotchplease@pattonly-absurd@starry-eyed-haiku-dreamer​@pattykrabbies​@shygirl4991​@musicphanpie-b​@superintrovertfangirl@silversunshine2012​@lockolocka​@nightly_illustrator @makemeaplant​@today-only-happens-once​@koalaaquabear​@catsandrandomness​@rose-gold-roman​@mockingjaysinger​@musicsavedmefromdeath​@anachronistic-cat​@heythereprincey​@dudlebuggs​@sanders-trash-4ever@siriuswhiskers​@pinkeasteregg​@virgilisaneternalmood​@multi-fandom-trash-x9000@kirsten-the-freak​@thepusheenqueen​@artistictaurean​@funsizedgremlin​@logan-exe​@thecrimsoncodex​@unknownsandersfan​ @yourmomsafalsehood​@robanilla​@dementeddracon​@ive-given-up-on-it​@v-blue-writer​@sassy-in-glasses@hunterjaegerthings​@blazeimagines101​@sanders-fam-ily​@trashypansexual​@toujours-fidele​@paxtonlovestea​@lowkey-logicality​@do-rey-me​@hottopicvirge​@rptheturk​@candiukas​@nottodaylogic​@ffsas-side-account​@shadow-walker-1201​@wingless-siren​@milomeepit​@grey-lysander​@fricksonsticks​@baileystarsketches​@yurai-brokeit@multi-fandom-trash-x9000@ace-of-hufflepuffs​ @voices-and-stardust​@deadinsidebutliving​@ocotopushugs​@datonerougecookeh​@lana–22@kentato-kenart@logically-sided@osnapitzbc@ruuworld@floatyghosty@theworldismysupernova@jughead-is-canonically-aroace@mercythemermaid@etherealweekes@pearls-of-patton@jade-dragon226-fan@mollycassmith@hi-disappointed-im-daughter@ace-v-p-d @acrobaticcatfeline@thomas-must-get-to-sleep@sesame-icecream@dreamerhowelll@fireflightyt@confinespfpersonalknowledge@reba-andthesides@thesilentbluesparrow@angered-turtle@fanatic564@emovirgil@misc-merde@captain-loki-xavier@evilmuffin

[tam-prince]

Mandatory 2000th Day Post for BTOB

I'm breaking my hiatus to post this. Don't mind me.

So I remember the first time I saw Sungjae and Changsub. It was in KPOP Star Hunt where Sorn won as champion and became a trainee. (I actually supported the Filipino who became Top 2 HAHAHA). There's already a talk that a new  group from Cube would debut soon. I'm already a Cube stan by that time, so I was like, why not? Another group to stan would not hurt.

And fuck I did not know how life changing my decision would be.

March 21, 2012. The date of Insane MV release. I was very excited since it would be the first group that I would follow from the very beginning. If I liked their debut song, then I'd stan. And shet, that was my kind of jam. Emotional but it has a cool beat. So yes, I was pretty sold. THEN ILHOON'S CLOSEUP HAPPENED. There's a trend in my bias list. Either my bias is a vocal hyung/unnie line, rapper maknae line, or the most energetic in the group. Ilhoon fell for the 'rapper maknae line'. ILHOON JUST HIT ME TOO HARD AND SHOUTED "BIAS ME". IT FUCKING WORKED.

2000 days ago, I started stanning BTOB and Ilhoon began creeping up my bias list.

I'm already v trash from the start. I wanted to know more about the members. I looked up for profiles. I don't have any concrete background on Korean yet but still I watched raw videos. There were only a handful of BTOB subbers. (Up until now Melos why isn't there an official BTOB subbing team? Weeps if only I can). I religiously watched every performance of Insane that time, and because of it I learned of my first bias wrecker in BTOB. *side eyes Lee Minhyuk* but it's okay I'm loyal to Ilhoon. Minhuk is probs my side hoe LMAO HAHAHA jk 1/2 I stumbled upon AmaZone soon after. Their first reality/variety show as a group <3 Their goal is to get 1000 attendees to their concert in Lotte World. That's a big challenge for a rookie group.

AND GUESS WHAT? AFAIK AROUND 1200+ ATTENDED AHHHH Good job <3 <3 SHET THE STRONG VOCAL LINE UGHH and RAP LINE WOW IM IN LOVE I still remember the time that Peniel was so awkward cause he's just a foreigner and the members just keep on approaching him especially Sungjae <3 <3  

When Insane era finished I thought that I wouldn't get any more updates because the era is done weeps. BUT BOY I WAS WRONG. MTV Diary happened. Shet, best reality show ever. MANY OF MY SHIPS SAILED (Minhoon and Penjae <3) and it lasted for 64 fucking episodes I AM ENTERTAINED FOR MORE THAN A YEAR WOW. It even overlapped with Wow era since the MTV Diary was at its prime with their rookie idols that time. (VIXX, JJ Project and MyName yiee) Anyways best reality show everyone should watch because of its rawness and relatability.

So I realized that this would be pretty long if I talked about all eras HAHAHA so I will just tell my feelings about BTOB.

I'm really proud of BTOB's development. Seriously. They've matured so much and they've been through a lot. They have experimented a lot just to get their "sound". 10 mini-albums and 1 full length album. AND almost all of their songs sila composer and lyricist. THEY'RE THAT GOOD AS MUSICIANS. During Beep Beep era, I thought maybe it's already their era. That Melos would be capable to give them the 1st Win they deserve. Sadly they only reached Top 2/3. I even cried when they only reached Top 2. KOREA WAS SLEEPING ON TALENT DAFUCK. When I learned that, They were just doing it so they can make music, and make music for the fans, I cried even more. My sweet angels. What have I done to deserve such a blessing?

My proudest was in Ballad Trilogy era. Fuck I WAS NOT EXPECTING A HEALING SONG. I very much relate to the song, which made it even better. They did not reach #1 with it but gdi, KOREA FINALLY RECOGNIZED THEM. AFTER 3 LONG YEARS OF WAITING. So when they came back with Way Back Home, which is another healing and another relatable song, BOOM FIRST WIN. AFTER 3 YEARS AND 7 MONTHS. FIRST FUCKING WIN. I really sobbed because finally, my seven heroes got the first win they deserve. They already received the recognition they deserve. It was smooth sailing from there.

Though they don't win at music shows always, what made them more appealing to me was that they do not do it for the recognition. They do it for the music. They do it for Melodies. If Melodies have recognized them, it was already enough.

I love BTOB. I just freaking love them. I do not regret being a Melody. It has changed me in more than one ways.

Here's to more years with BTOB.

#비투비_2000일_예지앞사

[kimseokjinseng]

About me + would you rather (BTS edition) Tag

Wow senpai @nerobtsed tagged me y but wow i’m honoured you noticed me what a time to be alive i freaking love your shades series and your hiraeth letters? AMAZING absolute perfection, vivid imagery, words that glide like silk in your brain, they make me FEEL things, asdfghjlkjhgfdsa

(fun fact: on my off days (everyday), i read nerobtsed as nosebleed (sorry!))

Name : Valerie Nicknames: Val, piece of trash (affectionate nickname for myself) Zodiac Sign : Sagittarius Height : 5’ 1” Ethnicity : Chinese Orientation : Portrait Favorite fruits : Mango, Watermelon Favorite season : Spring (day) + Autumn Favorite books : wow this would be an epic monologue…but my absolute two fave series is all the series written by Cassandra Clare and Hot Potter and if ffs count, every angst written by resonae Favorite flower: Kim Seokjin  Favorite animals : Dogs, Cats, Unicorns Favorite beverage : Apple/Orange juice Favorite scent : sunlight, frangipani, vanilla, fresh laundry  Favorite fictional character : Magnus Bane, Luna Lovegood, Number of blankets I sleep with : 2 Hours of sleep : used to be 8-9, has pathetically reduced to 5-6 Dream trip : Korea < Japan < Europe < Americas Blog created : April 2017 Number of followers : 56 (half of these are p*rn blogs lmao but thank to those who follow me idk y but thank) 

Would you rather :

-Build a snowman with V OR have a snowball fight with J Hope : Snowball fight imma K.O hobi -Get coffee with Suga OR ice cream with Suga : Ice-cream with sweet suga -Go to the cinema with Jimin OR the amusement park with Jungkook : Amusement Park with Jungkook all the way! Who doesn’t like amusement parks? -Do a dance cover with J Hope OR sing a duet with Jin : Duet with Jin ANYTHING WITH MY BAE AND I CAN TAKE THE TIME TO PRAISE HIS BEAUTIFUL EMOTIONAL VERSATILE SKILLED AMAZING SINGING and oh, I can’t dance for life -Kiss Rap Monster OR cuddle Suga : what kind of kiss are we talking about? Po po or tongue ;) But cuddles because I likes wom hugz -Babysit with Jimin OR Dogsit with V : Dogsit bc its taehyung! You get to see the way his eyes light up, the slow unraveling of his boxy smile, the tangible excitement in the air! -Meet J Hope’s Family OR have V meet your family: Meet Hoseok’s Family coz my fam ain’t nothing much -Film a commercial with J hope OR sketch with V – I hate anything to do with cameras, so sketching with tae it is! Plus have you seen his art? (His face among others)  -Hug Jimin OR hold hands with Jungkook : I LIKES WOM HUGZ -Go to Paris with Jin OR London with Suga :  PARIS IS THE CITY OF ROMANCE SEOKJIN PLEASE SERENADE ME wait… *drumroll* HOW ABOUT YOONJIN GO TO PARIS boom problem solved my otp has been satisfied -Film a drama with Jin OR do a photoshoot with Rap Monster : DAMN I HATE BOTH ACTIVITIES but I can’t act for life so photoshoot it is (ugh) but joonie will make it better -Attend an award show with Rap Monster OR wear couple t-shirts at the airport with Jungkook : DAMN I WANNA FLY ON A PLANE but couple shirts? Uhhh ok anything for my plane trip -Spend a lazy day with Suga OR explore a city with J Hope : My middle name is Lazy. -Fall asleep next to Jimin OR wake up next to Jungkook : what’s the difference -Have a fun picnic with with J Hope OR a fancy date with Jin : FANCY DATE WITH MY BAE they always lead to something more ;) -Have Jungkook serenade you OR have V sing you to sleep : Tae. Hyung. Singing. Me. To. Sleep. Is that heaven or what? -Have a dance party with J Hope OR sing karaoke with Suga : Karaoke!!! I can’t dance for life. -Go camping with Jimin and V OR go the the beach with Rap Monster and Suga : UGH THIS IS HARD I CAN’T CHOOSE maybe camping because it’s not too hot and I get to share a tent with 95z ;) -Have a sleep over with Hyung line OR a Birthday party with the Maknae line : literally, stop sleeping on the hyung line (geddit) -Celebrate Halloween with Jungkook, Suga, V and J Hope OR Christmas with Rap Monster, Jimin and Jin : CHRISTMASSSS OMG first we’ll go to a church service and then we’d get hot chocolate and then we have a snowball fight and then we eat until we’re stuffed and then we’ll open presents under the tree and finally we’ll settle around the fireplace and talk with cups of eggnog/cocoa in our hands <3

that’s all folks ( i bet no one is reading anyways lmao) 

im tagging: @btstrashstan @everythings-a-cactus @asassymess @caribbeanxxqueen @jh1verse @thebeautyofaishronna @ppphmsbtsblog @rinrevolution and @btshasgotnojams