#so ig i'll cower :(

[luv-again]

absolutely maddening that a sonic youtuber is so far in my head. girlie is speaking facts that i've said and written before and i'm SURE she has no way of knowing who the hell i am or my opinions but ???

she said sumn abt shadow seeing people for who they are innately, and not only do i fuck w that statement so hard, but i WROTE that exact thing in one of my fics a few months ago. uncanny shit. unless she read my fic somehow. but i sincerely doubt it bc i'm 90% sure my fics find a way of hiding in the rubble

i almost left a comment but i'm too delirious that to convey my words now would be in vain (it would just be incoherent screaming, i think)

[meowhara]

Mafia!Miguel O'Hara x Fem Bunny Hybrid!Reader

tw : death (sorry), blood and violence, gun, isolation, manipulation, mentions of abuse, slight smut, a little bit of fluff ig (not between Miguel and reader, yet)

summary : freedom do come with cost, a cost of another's life on the line

a/n : I'm still alive, unfortunately.

𝓟𝓪𝓻𝓽 𝓸𝓷𝓮, 𝓟𝓪𝓻𝓽 𝓽𝔀𝓸, 𝓟𝓪𝓻𝓽 𝓽𝓱𝓻𝓮𝓮

“I don’t think this is a great idea.” Lyla said as she sat on one of the cushions in Miguel’s office, busy with her phone. While Miguel himself is busy doing some paperwork. “What do you mean?” He looked at her with an annoyed expression then took off his reading glasses. She pointed towards the monitors in the corner of his office. A soft crying noise erupted from within the monitors as the screens remained dark and untouched.

It has been at least 24 hours after he isolated you in that room of his. You don’t even know if it’s day or night anymore as you can feel yourself starting to crumble away. Lying on the hard and cold concrete with tears wetting your face, your whole life starts to flash before your eyes. Memories of the past of how horrible your life has been begin to fill your mind. Will this be the kind of life you'll live until the end? To exist without any sense of freedom at all, making it all seem like a nightmare. But the nightmare has just begun.

The metal door creaks open slowly before Miguel enters, scanning the dark room just to find you cowering in the corner of the room. He kneels in front of you to meet your eyes, letting light illuminate the room so he will be able to take a look at your beautiful face. But you're too scared of him so you hide your face using your bunny ears to avoid his gaze.

"Have you learned your lesson, little one?" Your body quivers upon hearing his low and raspy voice. He moves your ears to the side then lifts your chin up with his finger. "I asked you a question." Seconds went by without you saying anything to reply to his question. He let out a 'tsk' sound before standing up and looking down at you with disdain, "You haven't learned anything have you? I guess you're going to stay here until you grow mold."

Just before he walks away from you he feels a tight grip around his leg. "No, please! Let me out! I'll do anything and— and I'll listen to you, I promise!" Your begging was like a melody to his ears, resulting in a slight smirk creeping up to his face in satisfaction. He got down to his knee once more with his hand caressing the side of your face. "You promise?" You nodded in response and nuzzled deeper into his touch to please him so he would release you from this hell hole. His smirk got even wider, "That wasn't so hard was it?" He unlocks the chain around your neck and offers you his hand to take. You hesitate for a bit before putting your hand in his.

He leads you upstairs into his bedroom while holding your hand tightly in his grip as if you're going to run away and escape from him again. He closed his bedroom door then cupped your cheeks just with one hand. He secretly loves the way your whole face fits in his massive hand. It makes him hard just from the size difference between you and him. How adorable it must be to have his cock buried deep inside you. All of those 'it won't fit' bullshit that would come out from your mouth just before he forces himself into you. To have you tear up like the cry baby you are and moan underneath him while he violates your tight hole with his cock. To have you submit to him and only him.

Just the thought of your body against his makes his mouth water, like a predator ready to devour its prey. But he must control himself and take this a little slower than he usually does. He clears his throat and puts those thoughts aside, "From now on I want you to listen and obey everything I told you to do. And don't even think of disobeying me, you know very well where you'll end up if you do. Understood, little one?"

You knew that you didn't have any other choice. It's either you obey him or try to resist and end up in that basement again for god knows how long. So you decided to nod, to listen to him for the time being until you found another way to escape from his grasp. "Is that a yes? Good." He lets go of your face before entering the bathroom that was connected to his bedroom. He started taking his clothes off with his back facing you, revealing his toned back muscles with lots of scars and a massive spider tattoo.

Your mind goes crazy as you think of how this will end up, not realizing how red your face has become. "Take your clothes off." He then enters the bathtub that was prepared for him to relax in. A loud exhale escapes his mouth as he relaxes all of his muscles, enjoying the relaxing sensation of the hot water against his skin. "Excuse me?”

"You heard me. Don't make me repeat myself." He warns, louder this time. You bite your bottom lip in worry before slowly taking your clothes off, presenting your bruised up body to him. His eyes trails over every inch of your body to savor the enchanting view in front of him. Those bruises on your body makes him desire you even more. If only he was the one who marked you and did all of that to you, not that asshole who abused you not long ago. You feel humiliated from how small he makes you feel. "That's my girl." He purrs then gestures to you to come closer to him. He lifts you off the ground so easily then places you on his lap with your back resting on his torso.

He feels pleased by your small frame sitting on his lap. He has found the missing piece that fills the emptiness inside of him. He enjoys always being in control and you let him control you as if you're nothing but his toy.

After a minute of silence of you sitting uncomfortably on his lap he notices your body quivers. He wraps his hands around your waist as a gesture to soothe you, pulling your body closer to his until there is no more space between the two of you. He brushes your hair to the side then starts kissing the side of your neck gently. "I've been wanting to do this with you the moment I lay my eyes on you." He said as he held you tighter in his arms.

He savors the way your soft skin brushes against his, the way your body flinches every time he tries to touch you. He pulls your face closer to his then starts kissing you passionately. Your eyes widen from his sudden kiss but you can't deny the way you melt under his touch. It doesn't take long until you return his kiss with your palms resting against his muscular chest. He breaks the kiss then looks down at your face with a hint of satisfaction. "You're mine, y/n. Mine and I'm never letting you go.”

After another 30 minutes of him forcing you to bathe with him, he gave you a new pair of clean clothes to wear. He even lets you enjoy dinner. Of course with him by your side. The night ended with you sitting on his lap (again). This time in his office where he usually does all his work. He even told Lyla to wait outside so she can't tease him for having you sitting on his lap like a pet for him. You started to think that maybe he has a thing for having someone to sit on his lap. But in reality the only reason why is because it's you. It gave him some sense of ownership knowing that he's able to have you within his grasp and knowing that he could do anything he desires to you.

You can feel a sense of relief washing over you as you relax your back against his torso. You somehow are able to feel a little bit calmer despite his presence. Maybe it's the fact that he hasn't done anything to hurt you, but you knew very well that he's capable of doing so. He just doesn't have any reason to do so, yet. Or maybe it's simply because you're exhausted. You started to feel tired, really tired. You didn't sleep at all yesterday when he isolated you in that basement of his. All the fear and panic you experienced for the past few days have taken a toll on you. Your eyelids felt heavy until you accidentally fell asleep.

Miguel didn't realize this at first, he even wondered why you hadn't shifted or moved at all on his lap. Until he looks down at you to find you sleeping peacefully. He felt bad for you, thinking that you must feel drained after everything that had happened so he carried you back into his bedroom then put you down on his bed before tucking you in.

Day after day went by but nothing changes the fact that you're still anxious with this new life of yours. Every single day the loud chirping noises of birds outside wakes you up from your slumber with you lying beside him. As his heavy hand rests around your waist, keeping you in place whenever you try to slip away from him.

Today is no different. Sitting in his living room while watching the TV to entertain yourself. You know that you should be grateful to the facilities and care Miguel has given to you since he met you. But the way he hurt and locked you up in that pitch black basement haunts you like a ghost. What if he's waiting for you to slip up and do something wrong then he'll make you end up back there all alone again? You never trusted him. No matter how nice his behavior is towards you, everything about him feels fake. You feel like a mere doll sticking by his side for him to play around and dress you up however he likes.

“What?!” Your ears flinched. His roar sounds like an echoing thunder from down the hallway. You peek your head out the living room to see what the fuss is about. Miguel stands tall in front of his subordinates with his brows furrowed in anger and frustration, his veins throbbing on his forehead. “How the hell did all of you let that slide?! Answer me!” They fall silent with eyes glued to the floor underneath pathetically like a group of whiny dogs scolded by their master. “We don’t know. It just happened.” One of them was brave enough to answer.

Somebody had successfully infiltrated his line of work. Burning his secret warehouses where he runs his illegal business one by one until there’s nothing left but ashes and killing countless of his men. He pulled the man who dared to speak back to him by his collar, lifting him off the ground with nothing but his bare hand. “Just happened?! They caused chaos on my property and that’s all you have to say?! Think again before you dare to disrespect me like that.” Miguel slammed the man to the nearest wall in rage. His body fell unconsciously to the ground with blood streaming down his head.

Your breath hitched in your throat upon seeing the man’s unconscious body lying on the floor. He doesn’t even hesitate to hurt anyone who upsets him, including the people who are loyal to him. His shouting continues, you tried your best to muffle the noise by pressing down your ears but it doesn’t help the aching feeling of fear in you. What if he hurts you next and takes all of his frustration to you? Multiple pieces of furniture were thrown in anger by him, breaking into pieces all across the room from how strong the impact is.

He dismissed his subordinates. Threatening them with their own life and safety if something like this ever happens again. His firm footsteps grew louder towards the living room as he tried to shake off the anger radiating from him. He took a deep breath before entering the living room, he just needed a break from all of this. The TV's still on with no one watching it and the leather couch where you were sitting is now empty. Panic and anger grew back inside him before he punched the wall in anger with his fist. “She fucking escaped again! That little—“ He cursed before running from the living room to look for you, jumping into his car before he drove off as fast as he could to catch up with you in case you ran off again like before.

Multiple men ran past the living room, trying to help their boss by tracking you down, preventing you from getting too far before one of them stopped in their tracks when he heard a faint whimpering noise. He scans the living room to find the source of sound before he finds a small erect tail poking out from the end of a curtain. It shivers and moves around shiftily.

He approaches the small ball of fur then peeked through the curtain to find you hugging your knees close to your chest with your back facing him. He didn't know what to do at first but he couldn't blame your instincts to run and hide when you feel like there's danger nearby. He decided to gently place his palm on your shoulder. You yelped and turned around in surprise, thinking that it's Miguel and he's about to hurt you but your eyes met with the stranger’s gray ones.

The stranger doesn't want to act too friendly to you at first, getting too attached to you means death by the merciless leader of the mafia. But he just needed you to comply this time so he could impress his boss by discovering you safe and sound inside his mansion when he thought that you had run away for the second time.

“Boss is looking for you.” He spoke with a gentle tone. You sat there, staring at him with your massive eyes. He sighed, knowing that this will be a lot harder than imagined. “He's not going to hurt you.”

“He is.” You insisted.

“He hurt you because he cares about you.”

“That's not an excuse to hurt me…”

“It is. Trust me.”

“Why should I?”

“Because the longer you hide the angrier he gets. You don't want him to hurt you, do you?”

You shook your head. Him hurting you is the last thing you wish to happen to you. Your eyes find his, contemplating whether you should listen to him or not.

“Fine.” You agreed before he helps you to get you back on your feet. You two stared at each other awkwardly until he cleared his throat and spoke to break the silence. “I'm Cain by the way.”

“Oh… Y/n.” You replied to the black hair man in front of you. He has never seen anything like you before. A woman with such a small build, massive eyes and fluffy ears falling to the back of her head in fear. You look almost petty and adorable at the same time.

“Y/n!” Miguel's voice echoed across the living room before he ran towards you. He hugs you tightly while breathing heavily. “Where have you been?!” He pulls away from the hug before shaking you furiously. “I thought you escaped!”

“I got scared of you so I hid behind the curtains… You're going to punish me aren't you?” You said meekly with eyes glued to the floor in shame, preparing yourself for what might come up ahead. He let go of you, “No. This one is on me. But if you dare to make me panic like that again by doing a stupid fucking thing like this, I will.”

Silence hung in the air as he stared down at you before Lyla interrupted. “Miguel, we're going to be late— What the hell is going on?”

“Nothing.” He stares sharply at you, his stare alone could bore a hole right through you. He kept staring at you, his eyes refusing to leave yours. “We really gotta go now or you're going to miss your flight.” She replied grumpily, she hates it when he uses that kind of sharp and aggressive tone towards her.

Earlier this morning, he was supposed to leave for a business meeting for a week. But your little scheme that you pulled off earlier prevents him from leaving, which obviously pushes him over the edge. “Let's go.” His eyes finally left yours as he walked out of the room. “Cain, watch over her. Watch over her like your life depends on it.” He paused then turned around to look at you, “And Y/n. Don't even think about running away, or you'll never see the light of the day ever again.”

And with that he left. The monster that has been terrorizing your mind for the past week has left. “Don't take him too seriously, he's just pissed.” Cain said casually to you before walking off.

Cain didn’t know you’re this quiet, sitting quietly on the living room couch with your eyes staring blankly on the wide screen. He kept his eyes on you and watched you for a while before talking, “Are you hungry? It’s already time for lunch.” You shook your head, a small ‘okay’ escaped his mouth before he left once again. ‘That’s it?’ you thought to yourself. Miguel would usually drag you with him into the dining room and force you to eat if you dare to refuse whatever he asked you to do.

Out of curiosity, you tail behind Cain. Following him without making any sound. He smiles softly to himself, he can feel your presence following him. You must be dumb enough to think that he wouldn’t notice you tailing him like a lost puppy. He entered the empty kitchen and started to wash and cut up some fruits.

“Need anything?” He kept that small smile plastered on his face from how cute you’re acting right now, his face facing away from you as he chopped the fruits so you couldn’t see his smile.

“Why didn’t you force me to eat when I refused to?” You asked with your head peeked into the kitchen.

“Well, do you want me to force you?”

“No.”

“Exactly. Therefore there is no need for me to do so.”

“But I am hungry.”

“I know.”

He walks towards you with a bowl of fruit prepared in his hand before looking down at you, “Are you ready to eat now?” You looked up at him and nodded. He let out a chuckle then ruffled your head gently. “Where do you want to eat?”

“I can choose where I want to eat my food?”

“Yes.”

“Then can I eat in the living room?”

To eat in the living room is a new experience since you start living in your captor’s house, but being able to decide something for yourself is the strangest thing ever. Cain's gray eyes never left your small form as you sat there on the other side of the couch.

“I can see why he likes you.”

“He doesn't.”

“He does. Very much. Too much for your own good.”

“Is it a bad thing that he likes me?”

“It depends. If you please him it's a good thing.”

You look down and start playing with your own food. “I'm scared…”

“I can tell. What do you say when we take a small walk in the forest? It helps me calm down when I'm stressed.”

“We can do that?”

“Not when Miguel's around.”

You can't just turn down the only opportunity for you to get outside so you agreed to come with him. He led you outside, through the back door then deeper into the forest. You couldn't lie but to feel amazed, you've never been into a forest before. Your former master's house was in a secluded area of a forest but you were never allowed to go outside, not even a step out of his house.

Your eyes widen in amazement as you watch the scenery in front of you, massive trees stand tall with sun rays peeking out through the leaves high above. Illuminating a clear pathway for both of you to walk on. The sound of birds chirping can be heard from the distance and the gentle morning breeze feels so soothing against your skin. All of your fear and pain have vanished, leaving you two alone with the world revolving around the both of you.

Cain shakes his head with a laugh from your reaction before walking in front of you, getting even further from Miguel's mansion.

“W— wait!” You shouted with uncertainty in your voice.

“Hmm?” He hums in reply and stops walking to look at you over his shoulder.

“What if Miguel found out?”

“What about it?”

“He's going to punish me in the basement again, or worse.”

“He won't.”

“How could you be so sure?”

“Because I'm here. Don't worry.”

He continues walking with his hand behind his back. Not even stopping for a second to make sure that you're following behind him. You let out a small whimper before catching up behind him. Both of you walked for a while before he stopped walking, he stopped in front of a beautiful small lake deep in the forest.

You let out a small ‘woah’ as Cain sat down on a massive rock nearby. He pretends to act nonchalant towards how excited and happy you are, tail swiftly wagging with both of your ears perked up. Glancing at your direction momentarily to make sure that you're not running away or getting hurt in any way while he keeps himself busy with his phone.

Not even a single thought of escape pops up in your mind. You're way too busy examining your new surroundings. With eyes that couldn't stop exploring the breathtaking scenery around you, from the tallest tree down to a group of small daisies on the nourished soil beneath your bare feet. In the middle of you admiring everything that surrounds you, the bushes nearby shake. Indicating that there is something or someone here with the both of you. “Y/n get back!” With a swift movement he stood in front of you, switching into his protective mode with a gun pointed at the shaking bushes. His mind runs wild from the worst possible creature that might come out right from the other side of the bushes, regretting his decision by bringing you out here where danger lies.

With finger pressing lightly against the trigger, he prepares himself for the consequences of his own action before a small bunny walks from behind the bushes. Exhaling exasperatedly he retreats his gun, securing it back into his pocket. A group of other bunnies followed behind the little one as the little one made its way towards you and started sniffing your feet. You sat down on the ground before some of them jump up to your lap, earning a couple giggles from you.

He sits back down on his spot, watching you play with the group of bunnies. You look so relaxed sitting on the ground joyfully with bunnies sitting on your small lap. A soft smile appears on his face again before taking out his phone to take a couple pictures of you without you knowing , reserving the memory forever into his mind. “They look just like you.” He comments. ‘Adorable’ He adds sincerely in his mind.

The taste of freedom didn't last long. Since Cain doesn't want Miguel to know that he had let you play outside without his permission, he hurried you back to the mansion to clean you up. Rubbing clean wipes on your knees and hands while you sit on a chair. You watch as he cleans you up from any dirt or mud, “Thank you.” You speak softly. “For what?” He replied, not looking up from the mud stain on your knee that he was trying to clean. “For the freedom you gave me, even if it's only for a while.”

Days went by in a flash and you've never been happier. Cain treats you like a human being instead of some kind of animal, something that no one has ever done to you before. He took you for a couple more of these ‘secret’ trips into the forest. Showing you different parts of the forest to feast your hungry eyes that are longing for freedom.

Playing with the wild bunnies has been one of your favorite activities for the past week. You always await for Cain to take you outside again. He only let you roam free out there for less than an hour. But it didn't bother you since an hour of freedom is better than none at all.

“They're fluffy.” He said as he joined you, sitting on the ground with a bunny nuzzling on his lap. You two have gotten closer for the past day, since he's the only person who dares to interact with you under Miguel's order. “See? I told you it's nice to pet them.”

“It certainly is.” He snickered. It's always quiet around him. He's quite a quiet person you figured, doesn't talk much. Sometimes, he doesn't even talk at all, just watching you with that gray eyes of his. Barely even struck any conversation with his own colleagues. But they respect him, just like they do to Miguel.

The small creature jumps off your grasp, jumping its way into the deep unexplored woods. It tempted you to follow, so you did. Catching up behind it with Cain still unaware that you're gone. “Where are you going?” You called out, thinking that it could understand a word you said. It kept jumping away faster, disappearing into the darkest part of the woods. You lost tracks of where Cain was or even where the mansion was located. The sky gets darker the longer you walk aimlessly by yourself, it wasn't this dark before. Dark rumbling clouds enveloping the once blue and clear sky.

“Y/n it's getting dark, let's go.” He stood up, wiping his clothes off from any dust or dirt. “Y/n?” He turned to find nobody sitting before him this whole time. Just how long have you been gone without him noticing? “Y/n. This is not funny, get back here so we can go back home.” He waits and waits, hoping with his little heart that you'll reply to him calling out your name. “Y/n!” He speaks louder, his voice fills with dread and desperation.

The sunlight was long gone. Tall trees surround you, trapping you there like a cage. “C— Cain?” You called out softly. Glancing your head around to look for any signs of life. Your eyes find the small bunny you were looking for earlier, lighting your face up with joy before you approach it from behind. But something faster than you did before you could even lay a finger on the little bunny. The creature's fangs ripped through the little one's flesh, ripping it into a bloody mess. Making you gasp from shock before it turns its head towards you. A wolf, a massive one.

Growling with blood dripping off its mouth. Your legs start to tremble in fear. You took a couple steps back before you made a run for your dear life. Running as fast as your feet can take you, through the darkness of the forest and through endless massive logs of trees. Tripping over something, you fell with your knees landing first onto the hard ground. Scrapping the smooth skin that was covering your knees until it bleeds. But you stood back up on your now bleeding knees and continued running, wincing in pain as blood dripped down your small legs with every single step you took.

Hope seems like a possible thing for you, until you're trapped against a gigantic wall of a cliff. Panic washes over you when you hear a couple of growling noises behind your back. The beast has brought its friends to play. The predator pouches over you, taking you down with its massive weight. You clenched your eyes shut, letting death to finally claim you after all this time.

A forceful kick landed on the predator's stomach, sending it far away from you before it landed on its back against a trunk of a massive tree. The beast wails in pain but your savior doesn't waste any time to pull out his gun and pierces multiple bullets through the beast's body. He stood there for a second, anticipating any sudden movement from the dying predator. You look over to Cain. He looks tensed, panting air in and out of his lungs.

“I'm so—”

“You're hurt.” He interrupted you in the middle of your short apology. He looks over to you, his eyes sharp with a hint of relief in his eyes upon seeing you alive in front of him. Without another word he scooped you into his arms, carrying you back with him back into the mansion.

Silence hung over the both of you as he treated your wounds. Cleaning over your bare flesh with rubbing alcohol before wrapping your knees up with bandages. He stood up, making his way towards the living room's exit. You don't want him to leave, not yet.

“I'm sorry. I know you're probably mad at me. But it's my fault, I shouldn't have left you.”

He stopped on his tracks before looking at you over his shoulder. “Miguel is going to kill me if he finds out.”

“Then don't tell him.”

“It's not that simple.”

“Cain, I'm begging you. I don't want him to punish me.” He stares at you through his emotionless eyes, his face unreadable.

There it is, that quiver on your bottom lip from you holding back your tears, your fluffy ears falling to your side. He hesitates but lets his heart take over. His mask of emotionless facade falters, kneeling down on his knees to soothe you. “I won't tell him. But I can't let you go out there anymore.” You nodded. At least you'll be able to roam around freely inside. Rather than feeling like a small captive inside that damned basement. Wiping your tears away before hugging his chest tight in relief. He looks down at you with a mixture of disbelief, he never thought you would hug him like this. But he returns the hug anyway with a smile that you've never seen across his face.

Tapping his finger on the table, his mind wanders off the boring topic his business partner has been discussing for the past hour. He has been busy these past few days. Taking over some work on the field, moving from a secluded place to another all day. He closes his eyes briefly, taking his mind off his work for a second. Cursing to himself the second your face comes into mind. He misses you, badly. Wishes that he could get himself back home, away from all the pressure of his work. Taking himself back to you, to see you and to feel you again. To hear you whine and sob whenever something goes wrong.

He switched the screen of a tab in front of him. Switching it to tons of camera previews inside his mansion with one of them showing your sweet interaction with Cain, sharing such an intimate hug in front of his eyes through the screen of the device in front of him. His patience was wearing thin. Standing up abruptly before slamming his tab down to the hard marble underneath, shattering the screen into pieces with such a strong force. He grunts, taking his coat with him then proceeds to leave the meeting room.

“Lyla, we're heading back home.”

“But Miguel, the meeting—”

“Now!”

She rolled her eyes before apologizing to her boss's clients for his aggressive behavior.

Eyes stirring open with darkness surrounding the room you're in. Cain must've forgotten to wake you up from your slumber. Sleepily, you climb off the bed then walk towards the bedroom door. "Cain?" You called out thinking that you'll get a reply from the other side of the door, but nobody answered. It's very quiet, too quiet that you're able to hear your own breathing. You opened the door slowly to find no one standing nearby the door. Cain was usually the one standing there, making sure that you're safe since Miguel left. Taking a few steps out from the bedroom you heard a familiar voice, "Little one, you're awake." You turned around to see no other but Miguel himself with a stain of dried out blood across his face.

"You're back..." You said nervously. The atmosphere surrounding you shifted, becoming so much heavier with his presence. "I have a surprise for you." He grabbed your hand before taking you with him downstairs. The sound of your own heartbeat grows louder and louder with each step you take. He stopped in front of a familiar door, you've been in there before and anything that lies behind that door won't be any good.

Miguel opened the door for you. You gasped with both of your palms covering you mouth. You saw him there, the only person in the whole world that cares about you. Tied up to a chair with cuts and bruises all over his whole body. His face looks awful from all the abuse and torture that was inflicted on him.

“What did you do to him?” Your voice trembles, lacing with fear and dread.

“I took care of him. For us.”

“You're killing him!”

“He dared to lay his hands on you. Worse, he likes you.”

“He was taking care of me! You ordered him to!”

“Taking care of you and stealing you away from me is a massive difference. I'm not a fool, I know everything. “

You froze, standing there like a fool. “What do you mean?”

“I know he let you go outside. Out of that gates that I specifically told you not to walk out of! Did you really think I wouldn't find out?” Opening your mouth to talk back and defend yourself but nothing comes out of your mouth, you fall quiet.

“You know the rules, yet you chose to break it.”

“But I didn't run away!”

No. Not this again. You look over at Cain, hoping that he would back you up this time. His head hangs low. Miguel grips your chin tightly, forcing you to look at him. He despises it when you look at someone else but not him. He's fuming in anger, jealousy took over every inch of his body.

“He can't help you. Stop looking at him.” He growls before letting you g0. You stood there for a second. He continues, “Who do you belong to, little one?”

“You…” You mutter under your breath, gaze descending from shame upon your own words.

“Prove it.”

“What?”

“Prove it. That you belong to me.” He offers something, a gun resting on his palm. Your eyes widen upon looking at the metal weapon he's offering to you.

“You don't want me to punish you, do you? Or would you rather sink into the basement floor forever? Your choice.” You know you can't let that happen. Last time you were there, it almost cost you your sanity. But you can't risk losing Cain, not like this.

“I can't…”

“Can't?” He stares down at you, raising one of his eyebrows from your refusal. Snap. With a snap of his finger, three men walk out from the shadow inside the room you're in. Your eyes shot towards them then back to their leader. “What are you doing?”

Miguel wasn't going to accept your simple words of refusal. “Making sure you're learning your lesson.” Without any words of order coming out from his mouth, they begin to torture him again. Your eyes water, heart shattering into pieces the second you see them abusing him for the second time. Cain tries his best not to let out any sound from the ongoing abuse. Gritting his teeth in pain, he sealed his lips shut to suppress any groan from the never ending blow given by his own friends. He doesn't want to worry you. To not blame you for the unfortunate event that is happening to him.

“Cain!” You tried running towards him in an attempt to save him from your stupid mistake. “No!” You scream before Miguel stops you, gripping your upper arm tight, stopping you from running even further.

“Stop it! Stop hurting him!” They continue to treat him like a punching bag. Hurting him without holding back, earning a couple grunts from him.

“Fine! I'll let you punish me! Stop them, please! He didn't do anything wrong!” Miguel doesn't even budge. His men continue, torturing him hard beyond his own limit. Tears streaming down your cheeks from sheer horror. Why are they not stopping?

“It's your fault. You did this to him. You're the reason he's hurt.” Miguel blames you. You can't help him. He's weak, tortured beyond anything your mind could ever comprehend. “Help him Y/n. Take his pain away. You don't want him to keep hurting, do you?” Maybe he's right, you can help him this time. By taking his pain away, forever. Miguel would not let him slip easily after this, setting his life in a horrible nightmare he could never escape. That's exactly what Miguel wanted you to think.

“I'll—” You paused, thinking over your next words. “I'll do it! That's what you wanted right? I'll shoot him! Just tell them to stop!” He lets go of your upper arm almost immediately. “Enough.” He ordered. They move aside. Unblocking your view from your beloved friend. His condition worsened. They broke his nose and countless bones all over his body. Bruises covering almost the entirety of his body. Scars that will take ages to heal tainted his smooth and pale skin. Gasping out in pain, blood flows down his nose to his chin. Dripping down to the floor underneath.

Miguel offers you the same gun once more. You look down at it with a look of despair painted across your face. You took the gun from his hand, holding it with your shaky hand. Pointing it towards the poor man you thought would always be there for you. Your index finger sits on the trigger. A satisfied smile creeps up to his face.

“That's it… He's suffering because of you. Let him out of this misery you had caused him.” He speaks, lips inches away from your ears. His voice smooth like butter, deceiving you like a sly snake. Cain's head shot up to see the gun pointed right at his head.

"Y/n please." Cain whimpers, staring at the gun in your hand as a tear falls off his cheek. He sounds just like a wounded animal, whimpering and wailing in pain just before it's about to be killed.

Cain wasn't the type of man that would ever fear death. But when it comes to you pointing a gun at him, his wall of strength begins to crumble.

“I'm sorry…” A simple goodbye left your mouth. Your vision blurs, tears welling up in your eyes. “Y/n don't listen to him!” He shouted with all the energy he had left. “Y/n—!” Your ears ring from the loud bang of the deadly weapon in your hand, blood splattered everywhere. An eerie silence hangs over the room.

Blood pooling underneath him before he exhaled for the last time. Life leaving his body completely. Cain is dead. And you killed him.

a/n : I'm going explain my crime here (in case if you're wondering). Cain was suppose to be a character from atsv but I felt bad due to his death so I created an oc, yay! Introducing my new babe, Cain. Sorry for not updating anything for the past three months. I'll be more active here soon, I swear. Just bare with me until the end of July and I'll start writing more contents here.

I forgot. Cain was actually Miguel's bestie. Well... Ex best friend for now. Since he's you know, dead.

Let me know if you like him btw, might write something based on this character in the future. Not sure.

tag list :

@yourmomsushi @s0lm1n @bracefacejimin @ahano @mimiemie @reverieblondie @urlocallocachica @sukioyakio @rin-matsuoka345-blog @tojishugetiddies @appleblueberry-pie @ion-news @outmodead @amelialysm @psychoyanderereader

[pajarinwrites]

中秋节 | Wen Junhui x Reader

➳ fem!reader x jun

➳ wc: 6.1k

➳ TAGS: idol!au, established relationship

➳ WARNINGS: omg um, cunnilingus, jun is a SIMP, piv sex, unprotected sex (wrap it, my dudes), praise, just general adorable lovey dovey softness, but like medium rough sex? ig, not really rough?, i never know how to write warnings, just like i don't know how to write smut woops sorry

➳ AN: HAPPY MID AUTUMN FESTIVAL BITCHES and 女王们; this is only moderately edited bc i actually meant to publish smt for 中秋节 last year but i didn't finish it in time so here it is now (I’m sure it’s still autumn festival somewhere in the world…)! I LOVE WEN JUNHUI

I DON'T KNOW HOW TO WRITE SMUT I HATED THIS AHHHH i don't think i'll ever be able to write any smut in which the man isn't a simpering, whimpering, submissive, cowering, crawling, obsequious little simping piece of trash; it's just how i like my men, but i kinda wanna challenge myself some time, not this time though :P also i'm low-key proud of this smut? i used miraclewoozi as an inspiration bc their smut is literal art...

also, literally three pieces in one week??? WHO AM I??? this is more than in the entire year before combined, i fear lmao. sorry. i'm off to return to hibernate in my bog for another six months now thx bye, RIN OUT *drops mic

masterlist

Jun stepped out of the airport into the sweltering heat, but had to find that merely knowing the weather conditions was quite different from being prepared for them. Luckily, he had left enough space in his carry-on to take off the jacket and sweater that he had needed in chilly Seoul and during the flight – airplane ACs were notoriously unpredictable. Despite this, Hong Kong never seized to amaze him with its constant warmth. At least the eternal sunshine gave him a good excuse to wear a cap and sunglasses at all times.

He flagged down a cross-border cab because, frankly, he didn’t feel like taking the crowded metro all the way home. This way he saved himself from a lot of heat, hassle, and the potential of being recognised, even if it delayed him. As expected, the traffic in the city was a nightmare and he did make it home later than strictly necessary. He paid the fee, dodging the driver’s interested gaze, and mumbling a small ���mh gōi” before dashing into his building.

When he was finally standing in front of his apartment door, Jun felt ready to just lock himself in his room for the rest of the night. That was, until the door opened to reveal his parents and little brother. Immediately, his frown softened and he dropped his bags to engulf them in one enormous hug.

“I missed you guys so much,” he exclaimed to groans from his little brother and a soft smile from his mother.

This was most likely going to be the last chance he got to spend more than a day or two with them. With their world tour and his busy filming schedule just around the corner, he wouldn’t have time for months.

Jun had spent years of Zhōngqiūjié apart from them. It wasn’t easy to watch most of his members be able to visit their homes and spend Chuseok with their loved ones. Some years it was only him, Minghao, and Joshua in the dorms. But he wasn’t going to dwell on that. Not when he could finally hold the people he loved the most in his arms. Well, most of them at any rate. He would never get used to having to choose between his biological and his chosen family.

His mother peeled herself away from him, squeezing his cheek and insisting that he had grown even more handsome over the last few weeks.  His step father clapped him on the shoulder and asked him about the flight; his brother asked if he had brought him anything cool. Unable to stop smiling for even a second, Jun assented to both questions. He was led to the living room by his mother to sit and relax after the ‘strenuous journey’, giving him a moment to fish the presents out of his luggage, handing one off to his little brother.

“Thanks, gē!” YangYang exclaimed and bounded off to his room to open it in peace. Their mother called after him, “Don’t forget to do your homework before playing! Dinner will be ready in an hour!” Jun smiled, handing his parents the other one.

“You shouldn’t have! I keep telling you we don’t need anything.”

“But I want to get you guys nice things, mā.”

She looked trapped half-way between smitten and resigned, but accepted the present gracefully. With a kiss on the top of his head she stated, “You can rest a little before I call you boys for dinner. I’m making your favourite.”

He thanked her, foregoing the idea of retiring to his room in favour of joining his mother in the kitchen. Most of the ingredients were already laid out on the counter, but when she bent down to pick up something from the bottom shelf, she gasped, “I can’t believe it! Where did all of our rice noodles go? I don’t think this is enough. And I also forgot to buy bamboo shoots earlier!”

She turned around, apologetically, and murmured about having to go to the market real quick to get some. Jun held out his hand to stop her in her tracks.

“Don’t worry, mā. I’ll go get the missing ingredients, and you can get started on the other dishes.”

“No let me go, Jun. You’ve just had a taxing flight and—“ His step-father tried to intervene.

“It’s absolutely no problem!” Jun insisted, not paying his parents’ protests any mind. He grabbed his sunglasses from the side table by the entrance and was out the door before either of them could stop him.

Jun had missed their shèqū, its homely atmosphere, the bustling of the people on the street, and hence didn’t mind the opportunity for a late-night stroll. The closest super market was just down the short road at the main square, and he stopped by quickly before continuing on his way to the live market.

There was a certain nostalgia in going to the market like this, just the way he used to with his mother when he was younger. The stalls didn’t even seem to have changed at all. There was the same group of old ladies dancing in the small park to the side, and a little further down the road, a small group of children was taking turns, performing on a gǔzhēng. Jun watched the windows of his old piano school pass by, still partially lit as students practiced inside. At the corner of the next street was the second-hand book store they had often visited, next to the pharmacy in which he used to sit on the kiddie rides for ages, singing along to jiātíng chēnghu or liǎng zhī lǎohǔ.

Still lost in nostalgia, he stopped by one of the vegetable vendors to acquire the bamboo shoots. Jun enjoyed strolling the aisles leisurely, taking a look at all the things that were being sold. As he rounded one of the displays, someone else was cutting the corner in the opposite direction. Jun barely managed to dance out of the trajectory of them, murmuring an immediate, “Sorry, are you okay?”

He pulled down his sunglasses and looked at the person in front of him in worry. They looked up, locked eyes with him and whisper-screamed, “Oh my god! Wen Junhui?”

Jun was taken aback for only a split second, which he spent worrying he had been recognised, before he could place your face. He hadn’t seen you properly in years, just another name on the long list of people he had to leave behind. The last time you had run into each other had been during Rock With You promotions, when Minghao and he had taken time for their own schedules in China. His eyes crinkled in the corners but he still didn’t dare to take off his mask.

“It’s been so long!” He said instead. You had pulled him into your arms within a second, just a quick squeeze before remembering where you were. You pulled away, pouting, “You didn’t tell me you’d be back.”

“Sorry, it slipped my mind. I also didn’t think I’d have enough time to meet you. Not properly…”

You wiggled your eyebrows, “What does that mean?” Jun blushed, making you laugh. “I’m kidding, A-Jun. But I’m glad we ran into each other. I mean, what are the odds!”

“I didn’t even know whether you still lived here,” he admitted, sheepishly. But Jun wished profoundly that you could feel how earnest he was being. You didn’t actually seem to mind his failure to alert you of his arrival, despite your history. Instead, you continued in your usual chirpy manner, “Yeah, I managed to find work close by so I could stay here. But I’m here here just for the holiday. Staying at my parents, you know.” Jun nodded, accompanying you to the register under more animated chatter.

“Do you have to get anything else?” You asked after you had stepped out the open market. He negated, returning the question.

“Me neither,” you replied, hesitating shortly before continuing, “I guess that means we’ll have to part ways again…”

The way your voice trailed off and your eyebrows knitted together made Jun reply before thinking better of it, “Actually, I think my mā can wait for these bamboo shoots a little longer…” You face lit up with such intensity and immediacy that Jun had to chuckle.

“In that case let’s take a stroll through the park. I’ve been keeping up with Seventeen obviously, but I want to hear from you, personally, how you’ve been doing.”

Falling into step beside you felt so easy. Together, you walked the same paths you did when you were teenagers, talking about everything and anything – back before he had to leave for Korea. He talked a lot about the shoots, dorm fights and misunderstandings, and how much he had missed his mother’s cooking. You winked, asking whether he hadn’t missed you at all, and he couldn’t string together a coherent sentence in reply. Instead he sputtered for a few seconds before you let him off the hook.

“It’s fine. I was joking, Jun. Oh, look!” Jun was glad for the distraction as he watched you hurry of to the pavilion down the path. If you hadn’t changed the subject he might’ve said something stupid. But when you spun around to face him under the colourful roof, with the small pond and the bamboo in the background, he wasn’t sure that he wouldn’t say something stupid yet.

He was sitting next to you, listening to you rant about your catty co-workers, absent boss, and the general annoyances of adulthood, unable to stop himself from grinning like an idiot at the familiarity, the ease of the whole situation. At some point he shot his mom a text to let her know that he ran into you and to eat without him. She simply replied that he should take his time, but he felt like she was secretly glad to have the two of you reconnect. Your conversations veered from family to old memories together until eventually, when the sun had set almost completely, you got up abruptly.

“I should get back. My mom wasn’t expecting me back immediately but at this point she’s probably wondering if I’ve gotten lost.” Jun nodded, getting up with you and stepping out of the pavilion. You threw one look back over your shoulder before smiling down at your shoes.

“I don’t know if you remember but… this is where you said goodbye…” Jun blinked slowly before the memory registered. He couldn’t believe that he hadn’t immediately thought of the day he went to Korea, the last day he spent with you, the day he missed his chance to say so many things he had wanted to say.

“Oh,” he breathes softly, “yeah, I remember. But it’s not a very fun memory.”

Jun decides to look anywhere but you, at the trees lining the road home to his apartment building, the birds flying overhead, the children playing across the street.

“I have to agree. But I’m glad to have you back now. Even if it’s just for an afternoon.”

“Actually, you should visit tomorrow! If you want, of course. I don’t think my family would mind seeing you again after such a long time, and…”

He stops in his tracks. The two of you have reached the intersection at which your ways part. Jun turned to face you. The words were still stuck in his throat, just like all those years ago, just like every time he’s seen you since. But this time, with your hopeful eyes looking up at him, he takes a deep breath. This time will be different. He takes the leap.

“… and I’d also love to spend more time with you.”

You smile in reply, and agree to visit tomorrow. To say goodbye, you hug him again, and he feels like he’s floating all the way home. Maybe tomorrow he’ll gain the courage to tell you everything that he’s been keeping in his heart.

Their dorms were quiet, the shared living areas swallowed in darkness as Jun excited his room. He had been talking to his family via video call for the past hour or two, catching up and trying their best to celebrate Zhōngqiūjié together, even when they were physically apart. You had initially planned on joining the call, but there had been last minute plans that had kept you from it. Even though Jun understood, he had been able to help feeling a little crestfallen when you had told him about it. The two of you had made it work since he confessed to you a year ago, talking almost weekly on the phone because both his and your commitments kept you from visiting all too often. And since this year he couldn’t visit home because of the impeding comeback, he would’ve at least enjoyed talking to you on the holiday proper, instead of just during one of your regularly scheduled calls. Especially with how long it had been since he’d last seen you in person in June. To him, an eternity.

Vernon, Dokyeom, and Chan had returned to their families for the evening to celebrate Chuseok together, leaving the dorm deserted, save Jun himself. They’d all met up for lunch as a celebration before most left to go home. It was an effort by the Korean members to ease the homesickness of those that wouldn’t be able to see their families over the holiday. Seungkwan had ended up accompanying Vernon, while Joshua and Minghao decided to simply celebrate with each other, even though they hadn’t been lacking in invitations either. Jun had made the same decision. They had let him know they’d be out until the night but that he could join them at their apartment later.

Especially Dokyeom had had a hard time simply leaving Jun behind, but the older man had insisted that he was going to be fine, and that it would give him a chance to call his family in China. But coming out of his room and being greeted with a cold, dark apartment, made Jun question his decision. He sighed, contemplating for a second whether he should simply return to his room instead of feeling the hollow emptiness of their shared dorm. But before he could make a decision, the doorbell rang.

He wasn’t expecting anyone, so the sudden shrill of the bell surprised him. Maybe it was one of the members, back early. Maybe Minghao and Joshua had decided to surprise him at the apartment. But when he looked at the screen of the camera system, he was greeted with a sight wholly unexpected. His breath hitched as he looked at you, your eyes staring straight at the camera, a warm smile on your face. Jun buzzed you in, jittery with nerves as he worried you might disappear or he might wake up. You had been talking about your crazy workload and extra assignments for the past few weeks, how on earth were you here?

This has to be a dream, he thought, standing in the open door and waiting for the tell-tale ping of the elevator. When he heard it, he couldn’t even wait for you to round the corner. In slippers, he sprinted down the hallway to the lift, coming face to face with you as you were trying to heave your luggage out. Jun cast it aside, picking you up and spinning you around. He buried his face in the side of your neck, breathing in the scent of your perfume and your skin.

“How are you here?” He whispered after a good few seconds of spinning and listening to your tinkling laugh.

“Well, you know, I bought a plane ticket, went to the airport in Hong Kong, I got on a plane—“ Jun interrupted you by picking you up again, proclaiming his happiness while you insisted that he finally put you down. If he had been a better man, he might’ve listened immediately. As it stood, it took the two of you several minutes to make it the short way from the elevator to his apartment door, Jun stopping every few seconds to give you another spin or a kiss.

Once you had finally made it safely inside, he brought your luggage to his room, before returning to the shared space and staring at you in fascination. There you were, right in front of him, leaning onto the counters of his dorm’s kitchen as if it was the most natural thing in the world.

“How did you know I’d be home?” He asked and you giggled, presumably at his flabbergasted expression.

“I kind of asked the members for help…”

“What? Who?”

In hindsight, he thought he should’ve expected this. There had been a curious lack of invitations extended to him this year. Especially considering that Joshua and Minghao were still invited everywhere. And, thinking about it now, the fact that the two of them had insisted on spending the evening ‘outside’ without Jun had also been more than a little suspicious.

“Almost all of them helped coordinate it, actually. They all had to be in on it to some extent.”

“When did you start planning this?” He asked, making his way over to you. One last time, he picked you up, setting you down softly on the counter. This time you let him do as he pleased without protest, choosing to answer his question instead, “Like a month ago or so. When it started becoming clear that you’d have no chance to make it home this year.” Jun hummed in response, stepping closer to stand between your legs. His arms found their place around your waist.

“I’m so happy you’re here,” he murmured, resting his head on your shoulder and sighing deeply when he felt you wrap your arms around him. He wished you could stay like this forever, or at least for a very, very long time. You turned your head, whispering that you had brought yuèbǐng from Shenzhen with you and he nodded automatically. Mentally, he was still focused only on your presence, the fact that he got to hold you in his arms and use his thumbs to draw absentminded circles on your waist. If he hadn’t been so focused on your body, he would’ve missed the small hitch of your breath as he exhaled against the column of your throat. He smirked lightly, murmuring something along the lines of ‘we can eat them later’ before attaching his lips to the place where your shoulder and neck met. You gasped, more audibly this time as he sucked on the sensitive skin, following the line of your collarbone. You tugged at his t-shirt, whispering that you should move to his bedroom but Jun smirked against your skin, slowly pushing up your shirt. As he tossed it over your head, he whispered, “Don’t worry, we’ve got the apartment to ourselves all night.”

He smoothed his hands under your thighs, grabbing onto your plush flesh and cursing the layer of your pants for stopping him from feeling your skin. Jun pulled you closer, to the edge of the counter, so that he could finally feel you pressed to him again, making his hands wander back up. He placed them on your waist, gingerly at first, as if you were going to vanish into thin air if he didn’t handle you with enough care. He still wasn’t sure you weren’t a figment of his imagination how you were sitting in front of him, hair and clothes messy from your flight, but your eyes shining so brightly he thought you were the most ethereal being on this planet. But when you bucked your hips forward against his, all that restrain flew out the window. He slid his hands lower from your waist, relishing in every inch of skin he got to touch along the way, before he settled them on your ass, encouraging your motions even further. Your arms tightened around him, one hand finding its way into his hair, the other toying with the collar of his t-shirt before slipping downwards and below the fabric to caress his back. He groaned, moving one hand - albeit reluctantly – away from your hips to tilt your head to the side. He was overwhelmed with your nearness, the swell of your breasts pressed against him, the smell of your skin filling his senses, spreading through him, expanding into every corner of his consciousness until all he could perceive was your presence, your breath, your skin on his.

You kissed him with so much vigour that he felt light-headed, the sparkle of your eyes encapsulated him, as if he was floating in space, surrounded by innumerable stars, twinkling around him. In his weightlessness, your hands were caressing him, still. You dropped them to the hem of his t-shirt, tracing along the exposed skin there as the rhythm of your hips never faltered.

You broke away, Jun following your lips with a whine. He wasn’t yet ready to leave your cosmos, but you pressed a soft hand against his chest, tugging his shirt off. Jun, personally, would have preferred to resume kissing you breathless right away, but you had other plans. Your hands returned to his chest, covering the expanse of his pectorals, gliding over the ridge of his shoulder, caressing every centimetre of skin while tracing the muscles across his torso. Every touch left a tingling feeling, pulling him deeper and deeper into your gravitation. His head was thrown back in pleasure, his eyes screwed shut while he tried (and failed) to even out his breathing under your attentive ministrations. When your hands returned to his chest and you flicked against his nipples tentatively, his head dropped forward in defeat, colliding with your shoulder.

He was breathing more heavily than he’d like to admit, as if he really was slowly rising through the atmosphere, the air becoming thinner and thinner. His cock was painfully hard, you grinding against it deliciously with every roll of your hips. Separated by way too many layers, Jun thought dimly before tapping against your ass, signalling for you to lift your hips off the counter.

You complied easily, leaning back in a way that allowed him to strip you of your comfy leggings. He watched you shudder at the feeling of cool marble under your skin, goosebumps forming at the sensation. Reverently, he let his hands glide up and down your legs, watching you shiver again, just from his touch. He hadn’t even realised that he had lowered himself down until one of your hands grabbed for his hair and tilted his head back.

Ripped out of his reverie, Jun stared up at you, towering over him, backlit by the kitchen lights. If it hadn’t meant leaving your reach, Jun would have fallen to his knees right this second. In this light, you looked like a higher being, come to cast divine judgement on him, a final reckoning. Jun found he would have taken any verdict, as long as it meant preserving your attention. He would have obliged any command, taken any punishment with equanimity. He would have taken Prometheus’ place, if it meant he could bask in your presence for another moment. He would suffer any acrimony, any scorn, any tribulation, if it meant your gaze would continue to rest on him like this – zeroed in on his face, your expression soft with adoration. He didn’t have to fear any judgment. The only thing written on your face was love. It was mirroring his own, he was sure, from where he was pleading for you attention from between your legs. You wouldn’t let him out of your sight, your fingers tugging at his hair with purpose. He angled his head, a miniscule movement, just enough to allow him to breathe a kiss against the inside of your thigh, a fluttering promise of continuation. If you let him. You loosened your grip, and Jun took it as the invitation that it was. His path mapped over the fat of your thigh, spilling over his kitchen counters, up one leg, down the other. All the while, he didn’t break eye contact, watching your expression crackle and slip, pleasure and frustration mixing in even measures as you breathed a plea, “Qīn'ài de, you’re teasing.”

His breathing became uneven, for just a second, at the term of endearment. You didn’t need to spell out your request. He could see it in the rise and fall of your chest, the sounds sneaking their way past your lips, the shifting of your hips – almost involuntary. The vision of you before him blurred as he tried to hear the rest of your declaration over the rushing in his ears. Your legs twitched under his hands; he didn’t remember when he had moved them there. But now they were here, holding your legs apart, leaving imprints in your flesh where they pressed against you. Jun searched your face for any sign of hesitance, any doubt, but he found none. All he could find was a sense of desperation clawing its way up your throat, leaving a blooming blush in its wake.

He still continued holding your gaze when he pressed his mouth to your core, pushing his tongue against the wet spot on your underwear. You gasped a little, hands twisting in his hair, the slight pain grounding him in this moment. His hands continued kneading your flesh, wandering, in feverish haste, across every expanse of skin they could cover. Above him, you writhed and moaned, his name leaving your lips as if you were now the one praying. Your head had tilted back slightly, breaking eye contact. But Jun’s gaze never left your face, drinking in every expression as he pushed your panties to the side to gain proper access to your sopping core.

“OhmygodJun,” you breathed, head lolling to the side when his tongue swirled around your most sensitive spot. One hand moved from your ass to your core, probing at your entrance just to feel you clench around him, hear the sharp intake of your breath. You tipped backwards, resting on your elbows as his name continued to tumble off your lips into the still air of the apartment. Jun’s other hand moved upwards, taking no care in pushing your sports bra out the way to grab at your breasts, pinching your nipples intermittently. He watched your chest heave as he slipped two fingers past your entrance at once, his tongue lapping between them, desperate to taste as much of you as possible. Your hands kept pushing him closer and closer, until his every sense was filled with you. Your taste on his tongue, your panting breath in his ears, the plush feeling of your thighs around his head. He moaned against your core.

Jun felt your high approach, maybe knew it was coming before you yourself even did, the way he could read your body in this moment, with how every fibre of his being was honed in on you and your pleasure.

“Jun, bǎobèi, I’m…”

His hand slid down to your waist, squeezing reassuringly. Jun felt you constrict around his digits, your moans growing louder and more desperate. He kept pressing his fingers into that spot that had you squeeze around him, kept his mouth sucking on your clit, humming at the flavour of you, until you peaked. You came with a cry of his name that made his chest swell with pride. Your thighs shut around his head like a vice, your hand evidently torn between wanting to pull him away and push him closer. Jun remained pressed to your core, lazily lapping at your release until your legs relaxed and he gained enough freedom of movement to lean back and search for your gaze.

Even though he had spent minutes staring at the ethereal picture of you earlier, he was still taken aback by your beauty: your hair even messier, your face blushed, your eyes glazed over in the hazy afterglow. He pressed another kiss to the inside of your thigh.

“How are you feeling, my love?”

It took you a few moments to answer him, calming your breath. A moment of which he took advantage to return to his full height, leaving kisses up your body on his way there. Once he was face to face with you, he brushed your hair out of your face, looking at you with devotion. You smiled back, softly, your arms wrapping around his shoulders and immediately causing a warm shiver to run down the length of his body. There you were, in his arms, gazing at him with love, bestowing him with whatever divine favour slumbered in your presence.

You leaned in closer, letting your breath ghost over his skin for a second before whispering, “I need you.”

Jun was sure he was about to malfunction. The way his body reacted instantly, unbidden, must have been proof of your power. He couldn’t suppress the groan that rose to the surface, betraying his helplessness in the face of you. But you only smiled, sliding off the counter, tossing your bra to the side, and leaning into him.

“I know you need me too, baby,” you susurrated against the shell of his ear, your hand falling to his crotch, smoothing over the outline of his cock against his sweatpants. Jun gasped when you gave his balls a squeeze, trailing your fingers back up, pressing them into his slit, already oozing with precum and staining his pants. He felt like melting, like he was Icarus and you were the sun, with the notable exception that your radiance was warm and welcoming. It didn’t burn him, it only made him feel soft, welcome, malleable. He melted at your touch, moulded himself to the shape of you.

Although Jun felt it was very much stating the obvious, he conceded, “I want you so bad.”

You smiled, discarding your panties in a swift motion, before turning around and bending over the surface.

“Then come get me.”

He only stared, transfixed by the way your muscles moved under your skin, how the warm kitchen light of his home cascaded over you, the way your eyes sparkled with mischief when you turned around to smirk at him. Jun’s mind was still fighting with the fact that you were real, you were here, and you were his. You cocked an eyebrow, watching him like a cat watched its supper. When he still continued to stare, your eyes darkened, beckoning him with intensity. You wiggled your ass at him, pushing it back so it grazed his throbbing dick. As you threatened to pull away again, Jun’s hands flew to your hips. You yelped at the sudden strength with which he gripped you, pulling you back against him once more, grinding down against your ass with such verve that your head dropped forward. A long groan escaped you as Jun crowded you against the counter, pushing you down and leaning over your back.

“You need me, huh?”

You nodded your head enthusiastically while meeting his thrusts, moaning his name again and again, and growing more breathless by the second. Jun wanted to tease you, he really did. He wanted to ask you how bad you needed him. He wanted to force you to be more specific, to hear you say how you needed to feel his cock inside you, hitting that spot over and over again. He wanted to make your pretty lips form all those filthy words, say his name, beg for him. But it had been months since he had seen you in person, it felt like an eternity had passed since his skin was last allowed to touch yours, a lifetime since he heard you whimper and moan and pant for him like this. So, he forewent any more teasing. Instead, Jun simply shoved his sweatpants and underwear down his legs, freeing his cock.

You whined at the sound of it hitting his abs, wiggling your ass again and breathing out his name in that way he would never grow tired of. He grinned, sliding his dick through your slick, nipping its tip against your clit, once, twice, three times. So many times that you whimpered, an indistinguishable string of supplications, whines of baby, please please please leaving your lips. Your forehead was pressed against the counter now, as if the cold, hard surface helped ground you in reality while Jun had his way with you.

When, finally, he slipped into you, both of you sighed. You voices mixing in the air of the kitchen that seemed to have been growing thinner by the second. Jun’s breathing was growing ragged, and he could tell you weren’t faring much better than him. He started moving, slowly at first, testing the waters and, yes, possibly also to rile you up a little more. But when you clenched around him, any self-control was thrown out the window. His hands on your lower back were shoving you down against the ice-cold surface, making you hiss. His hips snapping against your ass as he searched for that spot that would make you drool over the marble countertops.

“Fuck… yes! Baby, right there,” you groaned when he found it.

Jun leaned back down over you, his front pressed against your back, his hot breath by your ear, whispered prayers of your name escaping him. He drove into that spot relentlessly, repeatedly until you lost all function of speech, reduced only to swears and his name. Jun mirrored your vocabulary, one hand sneaking around your body to find your clit again and rub punishing circles. With the added stimulation of his hand, the pressure of his weight, and the way his cock was hitting that spongy part inside you again and again, you felt your pleasure crest alarmingly fast.

“Junjunjunjunjun,” you breathed, but, again, he somehow had known before you what was coming. His groans surrounded you, your perception narrowed to just the feeling and sound of him.

“Hold on a little longer, baby,” he breathed, and you barely registered it. Just nodding for the sake of nodding, praying his own release would find him fast.

“Doing so well, baby. So good for me,” he continued, almost to himself, baiting your release even more.

A few agonising, timeless moments passed until, “That’s it, let go. Come for me, baby. Come with me.”

Immediately, you released a sound somewhere between a groan and a whimper, you head falling forward again as your whole body tensed up. Jun followed your example, his head dropping against your shoulder as he drove his cock into you, prolonging both of your releases as much as possible, until the sensitivity forced him to pull out. He remained folded over you, so close that he could feel his cum drip out of you, landing on the kitchen floor with a small splat. The air felt too thin for any movement, so he remained draped over you, his thumb drew circles on your lower back until you returned to him, mumbling his name.

“Are you alright, qīn'ài de?”

You nodded almost imperceptibly, your hair sticking to the nape of your neck. Jun brushed it to the side, leaving a small peck where it had been.

“Nooo,” you whined, “I’m sweaty.”

“I don’t care,” he replied, matter-of-factly, smoothing his hand down your back one last time before peeling himself off you to get some tissue. His heart tore a little at the weak whine you let out in response to his absence.

“Don’t worry, I’m just trying to take care of you.”

You only whined more when he wiped the rest of your combined release from between your legs before also cleaning the floor. He caught your eyes from over your shoulder, smiling softly, and leaving another kiss on your back. After getting rid of the tissue, he pulled you off the counter, wrapping you up in his arms.

“You were amazing. I love you.”

He could hear the smile in your voice when you replied, “So were you, bǎobèi.”

“I can’t believe you’re really here…”

“I missed you something fierce,” you said by way of explanation.

“Me too. I miss you every day. Every hour.”

To his confusion, you smiled warmly at his pout, one hand caressing along the side of his face until it came to rest on his collarbone. You leaned in, lips ghosting against his in a silent promise, “Then let’s make the most of right now.”

Jun grinned, bending down to pick you up, laughing at the surprised yelp you let out.

“What on earth are you doing, Wen Junhui!”

“I think it’s time for a bath.”

“That is not what I was trying to insinuate!”

He wiggled his eyebrows, feeling his heart sore at your scandalised expression. Resting his forehead against yours, his eyes searched for yours, holding their stare for a few moments. With a smile on his lips and in his voice he murmured, “I don’t care what exactly we do in the bath, as long as we do it together.”

[blitzyn]

special attention pt. 3

dottore x m!reader

Request : HI- I noticed you have your requests open so I'm super excited! I love your writing sm. If possible, can I request like a continuation of your Dottore and fatui! Reader? Maybe one where the reader (sub & bottom) is assigned under another harbinger so all of his attention has been on this other harbinger instead of on Dottore (dom & top)? If not then that's okay! - Anonymous

Synopsis: Dottore has enough of his subpar Agents and decides to take you back.

part 1 | part 2

a/n -> i did it omg. super sorry ive been gone again! life was a bit busy but now that summer is coming up i might be able to write these a bit faster. im not super proud of this one since im kinda rusty rn but i hope this is at least decent! also, sorry for the sudden change in appearance!

wc -> 3.4k

cw -> anal fingering, anal sex, spit as lube, desk/office sex, choking, slight overstim, pretty vanilla overall ig, he's kinda possessive so there's that, not beta read

"Stupid, incompetent—" The Harbinger before the cowering Fatui subordinate cut himself off with an agitated sigh. It was quiet for a few moments, save for the agent's nervous breaths. Dottore wasn't one to get irritated very often, let alone angry. Perhaps the results produced by his previous agent skyrocketed his standards – or maybe this one was just dumber than an idiot.

"Please, help me comprehend how you lost not one," The Agent looked just about ready to sink into the floor. "not two, but six bases?"

The subordinate struggled to answer, mouth gaping open and closed as their hands shook in ill-concealed fear. Maybe in different circumstances, he would've given an amused quirk of his lips, though this was the last thing he needed right now. Instead, his lips curled into a scowl.

"W-We were... Overwhelmed..." they stammered pathetically.

"Clearly," Dottore said, impatiently tapping his finger on his knuckle. "I'm certain you're capable of speaking properly."

"We were ambushed by a horde of Mitachurls..." There was a beat of silence.

"And?"

They did not answer. "Don't tell me you lost all six because of mere Mitachurls."

Dottore's frown deepened. "That seems a bit coincidental, don't you think? If you're going to lie, do it well." He sighed. "Dismissed. I'll see to it you're placed back under basic training."

His voice held a monotonous tone to it that made the Agent fidget in place.

"It was a mistake—"

"Dismissed. I've already given you a chance to explain yourself. I have no need for your negligent incompetency."

He watched as the Agent hurried out of his office, and he had half the mind to yank them back inside when they slammed the door shut. He ground his teeth, irritated with the turn of events. He was going to need a new subordinate. Again.

He sighed. Not one of them managed to regain lost fortresses within a week, and he's been losing more than he thought possible. He, number 2 of the Harbingers, lost more than number 11. He was angry, above all else, but there was also the undeniable burn of humiliation at that fact.

It nearly surprised him how weak the soldiers sent to him were. Or perhaps they were always this way, and having you raised his expectations tenfold. He knew your strength and self-control were, by far, your best virtues, and it so happened to be what others were lacking. You were sent away to another Harbinger to keep the other Agents in check, and while he may have been the slightest bit proud to have managed to acquire an Agent that proved to be what everyone else needed, he was growing tired of having to wait for your return.

He shoved the articles that struck irritation through his chest into a drawer and stood from his chair. Quickly striding out of his office, he set out to search for you.

It didn't take him long to find you, though it was purely an accident. You were swiftly walking down the echoing hallways with a few papers and a relic that he didn't care to identify before he called your name.

"Agent [L.Name]," he spoke, his voice even.

"Yes, Lord Harbinger?" You paused in front of him after offering a slight bow. You fidgeted. "I apologize for the urgency, but Lady Arlecchino requests that I hurry with submitting my report."

"I am rescinding my permission to allow you to work under someone else." Even with your mask on, he was easily able to discern your surprise. The slight curl of your fingers was a dead giveaway, though, to any other person, it might've come off as idle shifting.

You were at a loss for what to do. You couldn't go against your current superior, but you also couldn't defy the words of one of the highest-ranking Harbingers that was still technically your boss.

"Lady Arlecchino said that I must hurry in delivering this item, and I'd rather not break her trust..." you trailed off as you observed him under your mask, something he was no doubt doing to you under his.

You nervously ground your teeth at the frown that crossed his face but remained steadfast with your words.

"Your loyalty is a virtue, but I'm afraid you've placed it upon the wrong person." He positioned his hands behind his back. "I will handle her when the time comes. Now, you respond to me."

"Yes, sir," you said after a moment. While you felt a tinge of relief at finally being able to work under him again, you felt a bit uncomfortable with leaving an assignment just as you were about to finish. But you knew you were going to have to set aside what you felt at the moment - you had a feeling something was off.

You thought about asking him what was wrong but decided against it with hopes that he'll bring it up himself. He wasn't the type to search for someone unless he needed them.

Your shoes tapped against the cold marble floors as you walked silently, following behind at a respectful distance. It didn't take long for you to reach his office, neither of you wasting time to get in.

"During your absence, many others have arrived to take your place. None of them have managed to produce quality or successful reports." He handed you a few papers for you to skim through. Without missing a beat, you did what was wordlessly told and blinked slowly underneath your mask. How could someone possibly fuck up this bad?

You startled a bit when you felt a hand rest on your hip, but maintained your usual demeanor.

"Would you like me to train the new recruits? Starting from there prevents more of this from happening," you questioned, curiously peering at him over your shoulder. "Or do you suggest otherwise?"

Dottore hummed. "I suggest that you assist me in relieving some of the irritation the others have caused."

You swallowed as anticipation bubbled in your chest. "Of course, my Lord."

"Mask." Was all he said, voice demanding and stern.

You wordlessly nodded, raising your hand to remove your mask and hood. There was a prickling sensation on the side of your face where his gaze bore into you, studying every twitch of your muscles. You could feel your skin grow hot, and with the way the corners of his lips slightly raised, he could see it, too.

Your nerves were abuzz with excitement, pooling in your gut that spread outwards towards your fingertips. You resisted the urge to rub your thighs together for some semblance of relief, clenching your jaw tightly.

"Already? Were you anticipating this from the start?" he mused, dragging his fingertips across your crotch. "How needy."

He squeezed lightly before abandoning the area, placing a hand on your chest to slip it underneath your thick coat, silently urging you to take it off. You did without complaint, finding the fur inside overbearing. You tried to toss it on the floor as neatly as you could before his hands found themselves beneath your shirt, gliding his cold, gloved palms over your scalding skin.

As quickly as they came, they left, only to push you down onto his desk. Your breath was caught in your throat, curling your fingers into a fist as you reveled in how he dragged his hands down your body to curl his fingers underneath the waistband of your pants. He wasted no time in sliding your pants off, swiftly pressing a palm against your aching cock.

You sighed at the touch, shifting your hips forward in search of relief. He gently squeezed and stroked you through your boxers with a quiet, condescending laugh.

He pinned you to the desk by the top of your back and began grinding against your ass, leisurely thrusting while observing the way your hands twitched to stimulate yourself even further.

With an amused smile, he suddenly pulled away completely. You shivered at the absence of his body heat, peering over your shoulder to send him a questioning look.

"I must thank you for your assistance," he said, rounding the corner of his desk. "I feel quite relaxed, now."

"I-Wh..." you stammered, trying to peer through his mask despite the lack of eyes.

"What's the matter? I'm afraid you need to speak up if you want me to understand you." He crossed his arms in a faux contemplative manner. Your face burned, unable to properly look at him.

"Oh, don't get shy on me now," he spoke with a mocking tone in his voice, standing directly across from you as he grabbed you by your chin. It was a firm hold, and you were unlikely to be able to free yourself from him - not that you wanted to, anyway. "It's a simple request. Tell me what you want."

Your mouth opened and closed pitifully before you finally responded, "I want you to keep touching me."

"See? That wasn't so difficult, now was it?" His grin widened a fraction and he returned to his place behind you. He enjoyed the way you were so easily reduced into a sheepish mess by just a few of his touches that you were sure were laced with some type of drug.

He removed his gloves and snaked one of his hands up your throat to your mouth, wordlessly commanding you to suck on his fingers. You readily complied and swirled your tongue around his skin which tasted faintly of chemicals and salt. Your heart pounded in your chest when he pushed them deeper, chest rising and falling in shallow intervals. You wrapped your lips around them and sucked, treating them as if they were his cock (which you secretly craved, but you supposed it wasn't much of a secret anymore).

Dottore could feel heat rising in his abdomen the longer he held them in your mouth, pleased with your eagerness.

A string of saliva connected you to him when he pulled away, his free hand sliding your underwear down your legs. He prodded your hole for a few agonizing moments just to listen to your hitching breaths before he finally inserted them inside you. His thick fingers provided a slight burn, but it quickly morphed into arousal.

He moved at a leisurely pace, enjoying your increasing impatience as you tried dutifully to keep your desperation at bay. He made sure to avoid your prostate to leave you needy for more, pressing against areas close to where you wanted him. You let out frustrated sighs but refused to voice out your complaints, letting him follow his own pace.

It was amusing to see you try hard to maintain your slipping composure, but he knew that soon enough, it would collapse completely.

You tensed when he removed his fingers from you, anticipating the familiar feeling of his cockhead against your hole, but it never came.

"You know, I think I may have had a change of heart," he said with a thoughtful tone. "Perhaps you should report to Arlecchino after all."

"Wait-" you pleaded, voice high and frantic. "S-surely you're not serious?"

"Oh? What makes you think that?"

You swallowed hard. Dottore is unpredictable - that much you learned. For all you know, he could be entirely sincere and you'd look like a fool, but a part of you believes that he's only messing with you. Getting you flustered was often a part of his intentions when he was around you, so it wasn't impossible.

"Because you do not back away from your plans when they're already set, regardless of how you think it may turn out."

"And might you enlighten me in what you think said plans are?"

You swallowed nervously as quiet words spilled from your lips. "To fuck me..."

There was a moment of agonizing silence (for you, at least) before a smile overtook his features. "I'm flattered you know me so well."

You bit your lip in anticipation when you heard the rustle of fabric behind you. You could hardly repress a shudder when you listened to him spit on his cock before pressing himself against your hole, holding your waist tightly with one hand while the other guided him inside.

You groaned at the burning sensation from the lack of preparation he provided you. Your dick ached to be touched, but you resisted and relished in the pain of having to wait.

"Fuck," Dottore hissed, fighting valiantly to keep himself from shoving his cock inside you. "You're tighter than the last time I fucked you."

"Just for you," your words were breathy, your rigid Agent persona slipping away by the minute. It almost made him laugh at how easy it was to break you down like this.

"For me?" he cooed, cock throbbing. "You poor thing. You had to wait so long just to finally have me fuck you, didn't you?"

You nodded, heavy pants exiting your lips. You peered at him from over your shoulder, eyes wide and watery; there was no calm Fatuus to be seen, and he found that he adored this side of you. He could hardly suppress a smile, instead focusing on how you tightened so pleasurably around him.

"It's almost hard to believe you haven't been whoring yourself out this entire time," he muttered, partially to you. "But I know that only I am able to satisfy you like this. Or am I wrong?"

He didn't expect an answer from you - not when you could hardly keep yourself standing. He curled his fingers in your hair and yanked, forcing you to look at him. Your incoherence wasn't going to stop him from trying.

"Well?"

"N-No... only you." Your cock throbbed.

"Thought so."

He let you go in favor of holding your hips firmly, pulling out briefly to slam himself back in. The sting of him stretching you out paired deliciously with the pleasure of his cockhead against your prostate, gradually speeding up until you had to cover your mouth to prevent your moans from escaping the office.

"None of that," Dottore muttered, pulling your arm away from your face. "Let them hear. Let them know you're not for the taking any longer."

Skin slapping skin echoed in the dimly lit room, accompanied by your noises that left no room for imagination. He pulled you by the waist and wrist, tugging you onto his cock as he thrusted forward.

Your dick produced precum that dripped into the cold, marble floor, aching to be touched. The need for release burned hotter in your abdomen, and you couldn't stop yourself from subconsciously moving your hips to fuck yourself onto him.

He paused for a moment to allow you to take a brief moment of control. A condescending smile overtook his features before he regained his previous pace, driving himself forward hard enough to sting. The pain only served to enhance the ecstasy that was brought upon you, lust pooling in the pit of your stomach.

It took a great deal of restraint to prevent yourself from reaching down and jerking yourself off, your nails creating thin indents on the firm wood of the desk. He could feel you tighten around him considerably and he nearly groaned, but let out a heavy sigh through his nose instead.

Snaking one hand up your throat, he pulled you to his chest and squeezed. You instinctively wrapped your fingers around his wrist but made no attempt to pull him away. He used his other hand to tightly grasp the base of your cock, interrupting your incoming orgasm.

You let your eyes flutter shut as drool escaped the corners of your lips, too hazy-minded to remember to swallow. Raspy breaths left your throat as your ears gradually began to ring, chest tightening with a need for air, but the deprivation only sent an addicting heat through your body.

You nearly choked on your saliva when his grip went lax, not entirely moving away, but enough to let you breathe. It was hard to inhale properly when he fucked the breath out of you, but you knew that that was the best part.

"Oh, fuck, pl-please," you babble, voice raspy.

"Please what?" Dottore spoke beside your ear. "I'm not a mind reader."

He subtly angled himself and targeted your prostate to hinder your words, a faint smile lifting his face at every stutter and cry you produced. You weakly tugged on his wrist in a vain attempt to tell him what you wanted, but he remained steadfast on hearing it from your lips.

"You can use your words, can't you?" He moved his hand from your neck to begin stroking your cock, the tip flushing an angry red.

"G-God, please-" you stammered before crying out, "Please let me cum!"

"That wasn't so hard, was it?" He relished in your pained groan when he briefly tightened his grip before releasing you, quickly guiding you to your orgasm with every flick of his wrist.

Electricity shot down your spine and pooled in your stomach as soon as he let go, catching you off guard. Your fingernails dug into his glove as you nearly curled into yourself, legs trembling so intensely it was a miracle you managed to hold yourself up thus far.

Your chest quickly heaved up and down. "W-Wait-"

"Quiet," Dottore shushed you. "You wanted this. Don't go back on your word."

You focused on his voice, noticing how steady and calm he sounded compared to your desperate pleas for release. A feeling of chagrin filled your chest, making an effort to control your noises, but your struggle was futile.

Tears dotted your lashes when the coil within your abdomen tightened until it finally snapped, the heat of your orgasm washing over you in powerful surges. You arched your back as your jaw went slack in a silent scream. Your cum spurt out of your cock and landed on the marble floor in a small puddle.

"I should do that more, shouldn't I?" Dottore said with a sharp-toothed grin. He wrapped his free arm around your waist when your quivering legs were unable to support your weight any longer, leaning your top half back on the desk.

You'd nod along with him if you were capable of comprehending his words, but the rhythmic pulses of burning ecstasy prevented you from replying - not that he minded. His dick pressed against your prostate despite you having just orgasmed, his relentless pace not once slowing down. The only sign of exertion he offered you was his labored breaths and occasional grunt, but even those were quiet.

You could feel his cock throb in a way that let you know he was close. You managed to strengthen your legs and started fucking yourself onto him, prompting him to straighten himself and watch.

"You just can't help yourself, can you?" he teased, hands resting on your hips. He leaned his head back and let out a satisfied groan that sent electricity shooting down your spine.

His fingertips gradually began to dig into your skin until he held you hard enough to bruise. He allowed you this semblance of control for a few more moments before yanking your hips to him with a few final thrusts, stilling as you shuddered at the feel of his cum coating your insides.

Your legs nearly went limp again, but you managed to keep yourself standing - albeit with an embarrassing amount of effort. You could hear his deep breaths behind you as both of you steeped in the silent afterglow. You suppressed a flinch when he decided to pull out, sighing at the uncomfortable emptiness it left.

You swiftly dressed yourself when you heard quiet shuffling, pulling out a handkerchief to clean your cum off the floor.

"Now, then," Dottore said as soon as you stood upright. "You have much to do since your absence. It'd be best if you began right away."

You nodded, slipping your mask back on your face.

"I don't care how you do it, I only want the results. Understood?"

"Of course." Your voice was back to its neutral tone, making the corner of the Harbinger's lips twitch upwards. It amused him how you responded so professionally despite him having fucked you not moments before. With a final nod, you left his office.

He turned to his desk once more, remembering the papers that he unceremoniously shoved inside the drawers. He sighed. It was back to work.

[vitaliadev]

edx "Video game writing" course

2024.09.11, 10:50pm

Thanks to that confusion around Coursera (I saw the original comments on ig, epic seems to deleted them lol), I was reminded of edx platform. It's avesome, has a lot of audit courses. They have some interesting courses on game narrative, i'll dive into them and perhaps review later on youtube.

The first title (essentials) has design document, which is neat for people without formal education.

I am considering narration design position right now, so it comes in handy, as well as fixes some roadblocks in my personal game project & the grant documents I was thinking aobut preparing (Unreal dev grants, DeVolver etc).

Reading the syllabuses of those courses makes me seriously rethink my career direction, because I've been putting gamedev on backburner favoring "more realistic" job opportunities. I jsut wanna learn fun things, I don't wanna work in the office doing things I don't care about :/

Ooh and the "working as a game writer" gives me instructions for the narrative job I've been considering to apply for.

I've been thinking I'll have to research how to prep for gamedev jobs without formal education, but these courses cower a lot of points I've been looking for and it is not an intermediate level.

The only caveat many of gamedev courses are obsessed with Unity as the engine for practice, I have zero interest in it.

[kmp78]

"I'll just say this: when I posted that KROQ SFG clip on IG (and mind you that clip was almost 15 years old by that time), I actually got comments like "HOW CAN WE BE SURE THAT'S REALLY JL, SHE PROBABLY MANIPULATED THE CLIP!!! "

That just further proves that eches want to stay blissfully ignorant about their messiah. I'm still not seeing what JL did back then that was SOO bad that it would make someone cower. So he, a super skinny guy, referred to a chunk of fans as fat. Followed by what he felt was a compliment about them screaming 😂 I'm still not seeing human trafficking or handing children assault rifles out of the tour bus.

He's a dude. A dude who doesn't always think before he speaks (typical) , who prefers pretty and skiny girls (typical), who speaks raunchy locker room talk (typical), who dabbled in drugs and/or alcohol (typical), who goofs around in the wrong moments or totally takes himself too seriously (typical), who completely whored around because he was single and good looking. Also typical for any guy able to pull it off.

I'm missing where he wasn't always rainbows and sunshine because his whole life is posing for pictures and signing autographs makes him the worst guy on the planet. 🤷‍♀️

Who said he's out there shooting up malls and kicking puppies? 😂🤔

[feuqueerfire]

Laws of Attraction Live Blogging

I liked To Sir, With Love and hope I like this one too. I was thinking of actually starting Pit Babe right now but there's still a week before that ends and I've been watching these shows pretty speedily, so ig I'll watch this now.

Ep 1 (Feb 3)

Bro, I knew the lawyer man is supposed to be kinda corrupt but I didn't know he was a lying cheater in court like this pls we're 2 mins in

Why does the shady site I'm watching at not translate his Mandarin >:(

oh true, iQiyi has ep 1 free

lmfaooo mans flewwww from that kick

Aw, I knew this was an enemies to lovers, so I didn't expect the meet cute and how charmed Charn is already

Tin's family is so cute (and such rascals lol), is one of them supposed to get hurt for the story to start?

This kid Tonkhao isn't gonna die or smth, is she?

Whelp man wtf that car was brutal

also why did they focus on that candidate or whatever poster before showing her getting run over, is he the one who was driving?

Oh, the driver was that politician's son

No, the politician's character should be mad at the son who postures big in front of everybody else as he throws his weight around but cowers in front of his father. The father should be angry that he's bringing such negative attention to him and his campaign, but obviously doesn't want this to taint his image and his family, so will put money behind cleaning his son's name anyway

Instead it's like the son is not only spoiled but is even talking back to his father and saying he's gotta clean up the mess for votes etc like no...

not this romantic eye contact with a grieving man, especially since Charn is gonna be representing the murderer I'm assuming

10 million baht? girl that's like 10k CAD, that's all? like Tin probably wouldn't have settled even if it was 10 billion baht (10 million CAD) but 10k is just insulting

damn, dramatic flashback of Charn being bound with a gun to his head?

girl this is already stressful since they're framing Tin, gotta get through 7.5 more episodes of this

Charn's smile is soooo irritating oughhh and mans has a gun?! wtf

Right, so it's not just a car accident, either the kid was drunk/on drugs or had some reason to kill the kid?

Since he got kicked out of the murderer's case, is it prime time to switch sides and be Tin's lawyer? Or is that against the contract? and not that Tin would trust him anyway lol

What is this intense music, makes it seem like Charn is going to do something untoward to a passed out Tin that he's taken to a bedroom and is undressing...

and he is also undressing... is Charn gonna make it seem like he and Tin slept together or smth?

Ep 2 (Feb 3)

oh I see okay Charn's sleazy but isn't gonna pretend that he and Tin did anything and is also gonna give a little speech about consent and sex under the influence

Oh, the murderous kid is searching for something in Tin's home... probably has something to do with why he killed the kid

poor Tonkhao and the memories haunting Tin

lol but Charn's defo giving the grandma and other aunt the ide that he and Tin had sex, as expected

loll the slow-mo and cuts in this fight + motorcycle stealing scene

a wound tending scene, of course. it's really cute though

I forgot to look at and reblog gifs for ep 1 oof I'll do it for both eps at once ig...

this slap from the father to the spoiled son should've come earlier on but at least it's here now

oh it wasn't even the dad who sent those lackeys to beat up Charn but his son

Are we supposed to be seeing a blooming romance between Khun noo and his bulter man Thee or smth? Because Thee's been soft toward this spoiled kid the whole time and now we're getting a wound-tending scene right after we got on for Charn and Tin

but we're also seeing spoiled Khun Noo be extremely callous but also it's framed as somewhat sympathetic, they're not gonna try to redeem him by the end or smth right?

I wonder how Sylvie's character (Maya) and this Ms. Rose (owner of a brothel or smth?) are gonna play into everything

oh, Rose is friends with Charn

ah, Khun Noo (I can't remember this kid's name fr) is looking for some doll at Tin's house?

Ow, Charn's understated, genuine smiles when he's not being a little maniac putting up a front

plss not grandma being like "Yeah, lots of girls chase after Tin but he's not interested in them. I know what my grandson likes."

Oof, obviously they've been building up to Charn's tragic past and I'm susceptible to it fr what with the "What happened to you before?" "Nothing. Nothing worth remembering. I forgot it already." and Charn's glassy eyes

Aw, something happened to Charn's mother :(

Also I knew that necklace was meaningful in some way! Mans is always wearing it (pairing it with shirts that show cleavage lol) and he was fiddling with it while thinking of his mother (although it doesn't appear in the scene where he's blindfolded and bound)

This is really engaging so far, has that same addictive quality of To Sir, With Love. I hope they can actually deliver and do it well in the remaining 6 episodes, it's such short runtime. At least the episodes are ~50-60 instead instead of 40-50.

Some people on the r/boys love on air thread mentioned that actually maybe the dad killed her while making the son take the fall. kinda makes sense since 1) we know he was there that day bc he bumped into tonkao 2) they’re very much hinting at a spoiled guy and bodyguard Thee romance (wound tending, soft eyes, literally carrying the drunk Khun noo over his shoulder)

Ep 3 (Feb 4)

is that dog the friend is taking the doll?

gonna show Tin how selfish people can be? Win over Tin? Is Charn gonna betraye Tin

ah the doll can talk can ur also record cuz someone in the on air also said maybe it recorded smth important

scary ass father choking him

if kid is really taking the fall for his father’s car crash killing someone and being urged to turned himself in because he’s young and a minor so won’t got as much punishment, it’ll really resemble the Death’s Game prison guy episode

…why was Charn there in the middle of the night? With the fire extinguisher? and if he has seen it from security cams and come from his home, why didn’t he call grandma and Tin to tell them to come out? and why is that guy recording? Charn did you do this

does the son really not do it? did Charn drop the ring as planted evidence?

as expected, Charn’s unethical behaviour is not behind us

Ep 4 (Feb 4)

pls Tonkhao getting beat up cuz she told the teacher that she'd handed out the wrong exam paper w/ answers

Also part of her punishment being watching Tin eat ice cream in front of her, so funny

Bro wtf is wrong with these people, why are they tryna beat up Tin with bats and then knife him like ik Tin was v daring to come confront them but it seems like such a stupid decision to just jump him instead of ignoring and going around him or smth but ig that's just the violent tendencies of this kid

okay but like are we actually supposed to have sympathy for this kid later on as he gets his little BL storyline or what?

I don't care about this bodyguard being protective of the kid anymore cuz they're both dumb af and annoying to me (though at least the bodyguard wasn't stupid enough to actually kill Tin)

They all keep hinting that everything's not as it seems but then beats up Tin for being like okay tell me what tf happened that night

Film is soooo good at the glassy eyed, unshed tears acting face

Ah, Charn confesses he set the fire

but he's still quite good at using pitiful language and "ah how could i still hope people see me in a good light? I'm just... evil"

pls grandma so funny even in her wisdom

lol not Charn "If you dare to touch a strand of hair on his head" girl you're giving yourself away

oof

That was actually a pretty good apology from Tin, apologized and actually said what he did wrong + enough justification to not make it seem like he's simpering but not too much to make it seem like he's deflecting

Ah, the father is now considering sending the troublesome son abroad to the states

yeah, why indeed did the dad let his son take a beating for so long before finding someone else to take the fall??

heh Charn (purposefully, delighted) changing in front of Tin and Tin going through it

oof almost kiss

Heh the women (I forget their names rip) have such a small part but I'm like :D hehe whenever they appear. And Silvy being like okay let's do a double date ;)

Oh interesting, so Tanthai wasn't gonna be driving that night because mans can't even walk when drunk, forget driving

oh you liar Charn being like "nooo it wasn't my plan to talk to that guy cuz we told each other that we'd share all our plans hehe"

Is this romantic progress

hm Tan's nightmare as he came across a bleeding and dying Tonkhao

pls, Tin practically screaming with his eyes for Charn to not let him leave and instead ask him to spend the night lmao

Sorry, this longass goodby scene killing me somehow. I can't tell if I'm reading it correctly though is it like Tin's kinda insecure about wanting to stay but not seeing the same eagerness from Charn -> he leaves but is kinda :| about it -> turns around hoping to see Tin but being disappointed to see the door's closing and he's not there -> then smiles when he sees that indeed Charn is still there seeing him go and waves bye

Ep 5 (Feb 4)

oh interesting, last episode when Charn was telling Tin to not trust anybody, even those you consider to be friends who are on your side, I was like maybe he meant that couple who works with them? Will they be doing something to sell out Tin? and i suppose they went that route

ohhh indeed the dog doll had a recording feature which says back what it's told. the people on the on-air threads guessed it in like ep 2 lol

They also guessed that the little friend and her mother are in kahoots with the politician and is why she took that doll, wonder if that'll turn out true

"When will you get dressed? Are you trying to seduce me?" Frrr Tin taking forever and a half while wearing clothes specifically in front of Charn directly

ah they're talking about what would've happened if All This hadn't happened after they'd met that first night because although they and the audience have both been very aware of the tension and attraction b/w them, they've not said anything until now

I like how bold Charn is with the topic fr though like first being like are you trying to seduce me? And then boldly grasping Tin's arm as he's moving away to be like what would've happened?

Grandmaaaaa don't interrupt!

Somehow this scene of Charn dropping a flower from the rooftop and them staring at each other while they smell the flowers is so Jiu (?) and Tian from To Sir, With Love. has the old time vibes

alks;dfj Charn talking sooo cutely to Tin on the phone at Rose's bar

Are we supposed to wonder if Charn's lawyer? bodyguard? dude is also betraying him or anything? Because he's very curious about the contents of the box

Oh, my guy was extremely into "what doll?" with the O.O eyes, there's no way he's not an informant for the politician right?

Ah, I was thinking they're gonna have the scapegoat killed when the politician mentioned him earlier in the ep but so weird from prisoners to murder someone in their cell like this, won't they just be given murder sentences

oh nvm lol disguise it as a suicide and ofc the cops are in their pockets too

rip not Charn being even worse at shooting after he said his plan to his superior

ah, as expected, Vit is working for the politician or smth lol this show really does "and now we will Heavily Hint at the upcoming betrayal" type format lol

Charn putting "bombs" to see who betrays him is good

the fire is really funny tho

girl pls the building straight up exploding is crazy

ahhh Maya and Grandma fun

lose your virginity? Tin?

alksdfjlaksdfjlk;sdj Tin being like "To apologize, I'll let you punish me. You can do anything to me." aksdfjlaksdfjslkdaf

only for fuckass Charn to choose this time to sleep smhhhhhhh

Maya saying she wishes her family could be like Grandma in terms of accepting Charn's queerness ahh me too

Oh, the Thai word for enemies seems similar to the Bengali word for it (sathru/shotru)

Oof, they're going to Charn's village + Charn's once again like hehehe I will control the politician and his money and power shall be mineeee (+ Tin will be happy with that arrangement too, trust)

Ep 6 (Feb 5)

girl

yknow what's up with these cars all driving on the white line

girl why tf are we singing and IN PUBLIC omg i'm skipping through it

a stalker? maybe an informant of the senator once again?

lol Vit didn't die despite the comedic fire and explosion?

I don't care enough about Tanthai and the bodyguard for them to be taking up screentime while they're cutely in hiding or whatever, go back to Charn and Tin

also are they in the same place as Charn and Tin or no?

ah rip broken doll?

Ah, we get the backstory

Oh, did Charn let the other new capitalist people also kill the original capitalist supporters?

Whose hand was wrapped around Charn's waist? The one-night-stand rose mentioned?

oh we're doing kissing and taking off shirts and everything

going behind Tin's back to send the senator a pic of that doll (now broken supposedly) to hold it over him

Ep 7 (Feb 5)

bruh, Charn really fucked Tinn and left the next morning to scheme against the politician oof

Tinn should really have recorded the stuff the dog said, hope he'll have the mind to record it now

oh Tan and Tee also had sex?

dumbass

lol sure I'll believe that Pai can rescue him like that

aw, the mother and Charn's bet about whether something good will come back to them for helping this village and it indeed saved Charn's life, so he lost

oof, Charn's ofc hiding what he's doing (going to senator himself) by saying senator sent someone to attack him

lmfao what, is the guy who Charn had a ONS with?

pls what is this guy T.T lol

bruh, i get Tin being like damn girl why are we at your ex's place but he's so irritating with being so jealous of Charn have had sex w/ ppl before like chilllll

okay good he realizes "Sorry for acting like an idiot"

aw, cute but I actually get so embarrassed at the Ruthless Night of the Horny

ah, meanwhile Charn's guilty face bc he's going behind Tin's back w the doll and senator. There's an episode and a half left, should I expect this to not be sorted out very well

Is Tan putting up his videos as posts??? Or is his dad in his iCloud? or is he hacking it or what girl

damn Tan is soooo dumb, he put up an IG story of being giggly with Tee fr?????? you're on the run girl

Not to rag on this random fictional woman who's also dead but I don't understand how these troubled characters' mothers often passed away from childbirth where they knew they could die and also the fathers are trash like wow you left your child who you apparently love so much with a literal criminal who might be terrible to your kid and hate them for "killing" you. anyway fuck this dad the most obvi but that doesn't really need to be said or discussed, it's just true and consensus

;akzjafklasdfklsadfj sorry Tin coming with part of the bed frame while he's handcuffed. Reminds me of some movie where the woman was running late and couldn't find the key, so literally had the whole bedframe backing while she got her kid ready for school or whatever, don't remember what it was called though...

okayy at least in the end, Charn isn't still pretending to have betrayed Tin

So much stupid shit (didn't even bother to mention the gun shot wound to his head apparently which healed in like 12 minutes at some kid's church room)

Ep 8 (Feb 6)

I know Charn keeps hinting at dying cuz he's like aw miss me please and take care of Tin and Grandma for me but literally why is he going to his death though? Is he gonna somehow broadcast them killing him red handed or smth?

Oh, Maya will livestream it or smth?

idc about this boxing fight

Enough of these mediocre action scenes bruh, where is Charn meeting with the senator and what's his plan and what are the lesbians Rose and Maya helping withhh

Wait, they were pretty clever with that plan but they didn't foresee anybody informing the senator that this was being broadcasted to hundreds of thousands of people?

Steal that man's gun!

Okayyyy I was like girl wtf no blood? but okay makes sense, he had bullet proof vest lol

ahh bossy Charn getting Tin to cater to his whims from the hospital bed

I don't get the point of Charn's teasingly detached attitude

damn, weird to realize that i kinda don't care - same feeling as atots engagement that did nothing for me bc I don't care about the characters

Actually, enjoyed the bit about marriage equality isn't just about love and romance, it's about having equal rights. Even queer people who aren't in love or in a relationship should have the same equal rights

Did Charn get that senator killed?

Girl I watched most of this at 1x speed and paying attention but now in these last 20 mins or whatever, why am I so bored? Why do I care so little? Watching at 1.5x and skipping when they're taking wedding photos or whatever without speaking.

Overall Thoughts:

I really liked To Sir, With Love which was a lakorn and so was different than every other BL I've watched and was hoping I'd similarly love this one, which is also brining something unique to the BL table. It started off really well for me, I thought Charn was such a fun character and was intrigued about what was going on. I liked the lesbians Maya and Rose as well ofc. However, I think toward ep 7 and 8, it kinda became very meh for me (that warehouse live stream scene not counting) because the mystery was too predictable/boring and thus had no tension, people kept making incredibly stupid decisions, and the montages of them preparing for the wedding was really boring, esp because I like the characters but am not into it enough to feel emotional about it. Nawin was a great addition in ep 7 though, so unexpected and fun. Unfortunate that the meh impression ended up being the last ones, since that sticks with me more than liking it more in the earlier eps.

Rating: 6/10

[2n2n]

I want to add some of my memories to this answer toooo (ig I'll just. link on... twt/retro. later)...!!!

Bird is right that the school/hospital had felt pretty monotonous for our first looksee, and we got kind of disenchanted at that point ... I think with the Maw the other thing, the environment is WHOLLY alien, unfamiliar, novel, & you can't predict or imagine what the next room will be like (I always will remember the SHOCK when you reach the upper levels & it suddenly has a very Japanese aesthetic!!!!). A lot of surprise and intrigue to keep you hooked going from a prison, to children's barracks, Roger's various collections, all the way to the Lady's boudoir.... comparatively LN2 on first viewing is like, oh ok... cursed school, cursed hospital/asylum/morgue/crematorium. Reaching the doctor was like "uughhh all of that to see some ugely monsterman... ok..." LOL.

But ahh I actually remember the twist of Six becoming entrapped in the Tower & being disfigured striking me HUGELY, I was... AGOG that we could DO that to our precious iconic Six!!!! I didn't think she would be-- uhm, hm, how to put it... disgraced, like that?? Victimized??? Seeing Six screeching, animalistic, cowering, whimpering, whining scared... I could have NEVER imagined we'd get to see that side of her. She's unfortunate, but she typically handles it with an aloof grace-- seeming indifferent to her own potential death. Even just her screaming as the Thin Man takes her, SO shocking. You don't hear her scream at all in the first game! She is VERY AFRAID of him in particular. Wailing in pain, agony, wincing in terror as you shout at her... I was, ENTHRALLED that MONO could do this. I had only ever seen anything depicting him as sweet & gentle, a SIMP or what have you. So the initial twist that he would be-- menacing her with an axe, shouting at her, nearly taunting her??? Invading her space violently, over & over repetitively, breaking down doors keeping him away??!? terrifying her, HEY!!!! aughhhh!!! How has your voice become an ATTACK?????!?! I remember the impact of that as the critical climax to meeeee, like, "wait!!! I care a lot more about this boy's relationship to Six now!!!" Being 2 attached kids surviving something external together, is interesting sure, but this is much better. I felt like, even with only the degree of torment in the Tower, I could sadly understand why Six dropped Mono... he left this impression of terrorizing her, destroying her comfort, I thought. She couldn't shake it off.... it felt as sad for her as for him, and I liked that.

In a way the Thin Man reveal, coming after this... assault... it almost feels more like, "OHHHHHHHH!!!!! OHHHH... I SEE!!!!! OHHHH..!!!!" it brings the ... abusive quality full circle, it felt like it made so much sense out of all of it!!!! In this way the Thin Man reveal is only as interesting as the Mono Is Aggressive reveal... the reveal that Six can fear him... and, it kind of prepped me for the final twist. Like oh... OH. Oh... OHHH. It's as if ONLY Mono/Thin Man can scare Six, and only through that window of intimacy! She doesn't scream at any ghoul just for being a ghoul! It's as if Six wouldn't. Capturing & terrorizing & keeping a girl & volleying between your selves... I get it!!!! Suddenly the entire game made sense, and no longer felt like a series of unrelated horror vignettes. In that way it became more cohesive than the Maw, so I liked rewatching it a lot a lot a lot.

SO... I guess I would say!! I was more shocked at the initial reveal of their interactions inside of the Tower, and a bit less shocked at Thin Man Mono reveal!!!

I feel like I overall had this experience of "oh, I didn't know Mono could be this cool and scary!!!" Intimidating??!??! Even facing off against Thin Man... flattening the entire city, bringing the Tower to him... I was like... whoa!!! At that point alone, Mono suddenly feels like he's framed more like a villain than a hero!! So shocking!

your streams was my first impression of little nightmares so i was going in Blind, but i had been interested in getting into it for a while so im very glad you streamed it! anyways, i had a little confusion when earlier in the game you were like.. "lol, foreshadowing the timeloop.." and it made me so O-O UNTIL I SAW THE VERY END AND REALIZED: wow thin man is mono. i was soo shocked. so, OnTo the question, what was your first reaction to finding out thin man was mono like? were you shocked, not shocked, expected it, etc? how did avvy feel, too? it was such a nice plot twist so im very curious !!! - retrospring ask [link]

Hahuuu~ ah I'm amused that this was your experience, I'm um glad if our errant commentary as we were playing wasn't like ruining the experience for you or anything kfkfk...

Me and Avvy were first watching Little Nightmares through some letsplays done by a vtuber girlie we like (Hiyo-chan, a member of KittenParty.) This was because, I'm actually quite sensitive and easily put-off my by horror, so the 'padding' of having a silly anime girlie play the game was helpful. I have nightmares easily (ironically enough...) so when I imbibe too much horror, I can be left ah, anxious, restless, unable to sleep, kind of plagued by my own mind for days... 9_9; My problem is, I'm also intrigued by horror concepts, due to my interests... so I've always been curious about Little Nightmares as a series, actually. It's just always been a big question of, if I could even handle the experience...

Typically, I like to go into games blind, and experience the narrative unfold in real time. I would have preferred experiencing LN this way, but alas, I couldn't steel myself to boot up the game once, even after having gotten it for free years ago. So in the end, it just was a serendipitous thing, that I was already watching a lot of streams from KittenParty members, and Hiyo-chan happened to have played LN1+DLC+LN2. I thought, sure, why not finally get into that...? Might as well, if I can't play it... Funny because, as casual putting on the stream was, I still would get so anxious I'd have to look away, and we had to make sure it wasn't too close to bedtime before watching... It was a slow process as a result. 9.9;

We got through LN1 and enjoyed the ending of that one. As we were watching LN2, it felt less 'tight' by comparison... hmm, like, less thematic?? As a result of no longer being in the singular environment of the Maw. We started to get this feeling like 'wait, what's the theme here? What's the point of this all?' So I remember we actually paused midway through the Hospital chapter (after dealing with all the Patients to get the fuses.) Anddd we just like, reconvened, read ahead to see what the ending was. Hmm, it's a little funny looking back... because I remember we were simply feeling like 'ehh, is this all worth it?' ... where are we going... Mm but this happens sometimes, I mean I had to stop my playthrough of OMORI and spoil the ending for myself, because I was starting to feel unsure if it was 'worth it' to continue sitting through. TBH, it doesn't even have to be that a game is Bad, I'm just umm a sensitive person so, I think the more invested I am in something, the more I'm wary about being overly invested & then being disappointed by the outcome... [sniffs] And well, I'm also fussy and picky, so I can admit that sometimes I am impatient to learn whether or not something is going to feel like a Waste of Time... Much to read and watch you know, don't wanna lose braincells to frustrating things.

... all that said... Learning about Mono becoming the Thin Man was intriguing. And umm, amusing also, loll like, wait, whahhh? Why is the little lad becoming slenderman what's up with that... Watching footage, the scenes involving the Thin Man were simply cool, I liked the feel to them. What does it mean that the enemy that Mono and Six face is actually Mono...? We finished watching the game and then dwelled on it, some. This way of processing the twist meant that it kind of came to me 'slowly'... I wouldn't say I really felt the impact of playing it all in a continous sitting & then receiving it. However, it's meant that over time, I've appreciated more and more, the sequence of events leading to that reveal. I think everything from Six being kidnapped > confrontation with the Thin Man > Signal Tower + destroying Monster Six's music box > the finale of Mono being dropped & steadily becoming Thin Man... All very compelling-!! I suppose, I think it walks you through all the emotions you're SUPPOSED to feel...

'NOO nooo not Six!! Ooh give her back... I'll save you Six!! This awful ghoul has taken you from me... Whoa-!! These crazy powers I am gaining...?? Ohh.. Oh noo Six what happened to you? Eh... ahh... break her music box?? ;; Ahhrh is this right? But, I guess I have to do it... NOO Six whyyy?? Why did... o-oh. Oh, okay, I guess, I guess that's, why...'

And ultimately I must enjoy what it says about Mono, that at the end of this journey... He, simply chooses to perpetuate this cycle, that with all the knowledge of what's happened, he will still be stuck in this loop. It's a satisfying ending that retroactively makes the game more interesting to rewatch, again and again... Really, I feel that LN2 did so good at what it set out to do, that even the events of LN1 are more compelling because of it — even if, initially, I was feeling that 1 had a stronger experience.

I guess you can just imagine me and Avvy really pouring over this stuff, spiritually swirling our wine glasses, discussing it for days on end... Really enjoye it. Enough that it has motivated me to, essentially overcome my paralyzing fear of the game, and instead just receive it as a fun story. Enough that I had to play it myself! XD Soo strange to think about really... that hasn't happened before.

[most-ment]

Me

If only I didn't see myself through your eyes

Your dissapointed gaze ingrained in my mind

If only your degrading words weren't my constant thoughts

Slander upon Slander causing hurt upon hurt

•

To think you don't even have to be there

For me to hide and cower in fear

I sink, lower and lower with every interaction

You get colder and colder, judging my every action

•

I can't even breathe

Not when your around

I'm so desperately in need

Of some safer grounds

•

Breathing down my neck

Every insult or comment replay in my head

The search for happiness seems like a never ending trek

Soo far long I can't seem to find the end

•

I really think i'll never be free

I can run or hide but your glaring face is all I'll ever see

I don't think I'll ever be me

I can search inside but the pain is all there will ever be

•

Artiste: A. Shipwright

Note: Hi Loves, mamma is tired. Hope u like the poem

Another note: idk if this means the end of my hiatus, my head is still in a weird place but getting better. I really want to come back at a hundred percent but hope u enjoy this ig.

My tag list in hiatus: @soobverse @crownwriter @glitterynotesbookspasta @heartsproduct @think-through-pen @musingofaninsignificantwriter @friesnoketchup

[roll-da-credits]

Idk if this is allowed so please ignore it if it isn't, could i have a megumi x reader when megumi was still in Junior High? He had a girlfriend and like he broke up with them when he graduated cause he doesn't want to get her involved in that business but then one day meet both as sorcerers.

Megumi + His Junior High Era (ig? not rly sure what to name it since it isn't an 'arc')

Join my event!

"Huh?!" Megumi pointed at you wide-eyed, "Why are you here?!"

You also looked at the man with wide eyes, though at the same time struggling to stop laughter from erupting. In front of you was none other than the Fushiguro Megumi himself, in all his glory. Wearing a Tokyo Jujutsu High uniform. Whilst you, on the other hand, comfortably wore the Kyoto Jujutsu High uniform.

~

Going back in time just a little bit, you and Megumi were quite the couple. The boy who beat up almost every single delinquent in his area and his sweeter, yet still terrifying, lover.

"You're a literal drama queen," you spoke to your boyfriend, sitting on top of a pile of delinquents he just beat up.

He pouted a bit and looked away from you. Annoyed at the fact that you caught him after he finished beating up people.

"So? At least now no one will bother us," he shrugged, going down the pile and walking to your side.

You rolled your eyes and reached up to ruffle his spiky hair.

"Sure," you smiled at him.

You saw a small blush creep to Megumi's face as he muttered something you didn't quite hear. As the two of you walked to your home, like you'd always do, his expression slowly turned solemn, causing a small worry to grow in you.

"Something wrong?" you asked.

"I was just thinking about High School," Megumi sighed.

He knew he had to go to Jujutsu High, he had to become a sorcerer no matter what. And he obviously didn't want you in any part of that world. Terrified of you getting hurt or getting involved with dangerous people.

"Ok so I know I'm moving to Kyoto, but who said we can't still visit each other?" you beamed, thinking his worry was because of you moving.

Yet, Megumi shook his head, causing the smile on your face to fade away.

"It's not about that," the two of you continued walking to your home, "I was thinking we should break up," he created a distance between the two of you.

You stopped dead in your tracks, realizing what he meant.

"What do you mean?"

"I'm going to a school that's going to train me to do dangerous stuff, I don't want to involve you," Megumi stopped as well, looking back at you coldly.

You stared back at him, a bubbling nervousness creeping in your guy.

"You're kidding, right? Listen, I don't care ok?" you reached out to hold his hand only for him to yank it backward.

"But I do," he glared at you making you cower at his gaze, they were usually directed at those delinquents, not, you.

"I want a brand new start and that means cutting off everything in this old place," his words were spoken like poison, straight-cut with no hesitation.

You stared at him, dumbfounded, confused. This wasn't the Megumi you knew. There must be a reason why he's acting like this. Why he's acting so hostile all of the sudden.

"You're only a few blocks from your house, I'll leave, don't talk to me tomorrow," just like that, he walked away.

Leaving you in the middle of the crosswalk to watch him leave.

Following what he said the day before, you didn't try talking to Megumi the next day in class. He didn't either. You both avoided one another that day, and the day after, and the day after that one, and so on. Till the day of your graduation came, the both of you didn't even spare each other a glance.

~

"You, idiot," you emphasized the word idiot, crossing your arms on your chest, "The entire reason you broke up with me was that you were going to be a sorcerer?"

The people around Megumi consisting of Gojo, Itadori, and Nobara all made an oohing sound. Surprised at the fact someone could even date Megumi.

"You haven't changed at all, still a drama queen," this time, Megumi was the one who stayed silent.

Completely shocked to even utter a word towards you. He said all those nasty things your way just to keep you away from him. Only for you to actually be in the industry he tried his best to keep you away from?

"You're a sorcerer?!" he stammered out.

You laughed.

"What gave it away? The fact that I'm wearing the same uniform as Kyoto's Jujutsu High or the fact that I'm using a cursed weapon?" you teased him.

"You really have no taste Fushiguro," Nobara tsked beside him, shaking her head in disappointment.

"I'm going to agree with her on this one, you broke up with them?!" Gojo also spoke out, emphasizing by pointing towards you.

You laughed at the antics of the strongest sorcerer alive. You had half-expected the people from Tokyo's Jujutsu High to be a little bit more uptight since they were trained by THE Gojo Satoru. But seeing Megumi was definitely a surprise.

"I didn't want them to be involved in the Jujutsu world damnit," Megumi groaned and covered his face in embarrassment.

"You're not the only one who can fight you know?" you walked over towards him and reached up to ruffle his hair.

The hair you missed much more than you had originally thought. Against Megumi's better judgment, he leaned into your touch. surprisingly very much starved of your touch just like you with his.

"Ooooohhhhhhh" Nobara and Yuji teased him.

"Right then, let's finish the mission, and maybe afterward we could get ice cream?" you smirked towards Megumi.

Another round of teasing sounds erupted from Gojo, Nobara, and Yuji. Megumi's face blushed brightly.

"Are you asking me on a date? You actually forgive me?" he asked almost warily.

You shrugged.

"If you want it to be, then it's a date. Plus, seeing the circumstances now, I kind of get why you wouldn't want me to get hurt, I wouldn't want you getting hurt either."

If it was possible to fluster Megumi anymore, then that comic would be the tipping point for him. He covered his face and nodded silently.

"Then it's a date!" you laughed out loud.

Earning cheers and more teasing from everyone else around you. Needless to say, that was the fastest mission Megumi had ever done in his entire life.

I feel like I could've made this VERY angsty with a VERY sad ending. Like maybe the reader already moved on and is with another guy or sumn. BUT I wanted more fluffy moments with Megumi so I chose not to. Anyways, I HOPE YOU ENJOYED IT AND THANK YOU FOR REQUESTING!!

[niskoo]

Memories kept in the pink hoodie

pairing: Ex! Heeseung x reader

genre: angst, fluff in the end ig, breakup! AU

warnings: swearing, uhhh they like break down together

word count: 2.2k words OMG

a/n: another one of my requests!! thank you all for the ideas its really helping!! mmm this one was very interesting to write because i usually write crack/fluff, aaannndd ive literally never done anything ive written IURHWIU thank you for the great idea anon <33 THIS HELPED SO MUCH OMG USUALLY MY ANGST SUCKS BUT IM PRETTY PROUD OF THIS AAAA ALSO IM SORRY IF THIS WASNT REALLY WHAT YOU WANTED IDK THERE ALWAYS HAS TO BE FLUFF IN MY IMAGINES IG 😓😭

feel free to request and help get rid of my writers block!!

a bit based off of 'try again' by jaehyun and d.ear

You should've known the consequences of dating an idol, you should've been careful. Of course they wouldn't let you be together, he's in one of the rising groups, heck, he was in one of the biggest companies.

It wasn't necessarily the company's fault you were so heartbroken, it's both your faults. You couldn't help but blame each other for how careless you were. You know better than to make things worse, and yet you did.

The evening you go back to his dorm after being confronted by the company, you two started a huge argument of who's fault it was. Either it was his fault for not taking caution during work, or your fault for always checking up on him. All loving actions in the past became reasons for why you should break up, thus cracking your relationship further.

When you went home that night, with your backpack full of your things, you did nothing. You didn't cry, you didn't rage, you simply thought that this was the end, you felt guilty that it had to end like this, instead of just working it out and breaking it off peacefully.

Your heart was left cracked and hurt for sure, but this time, you blame yourself. You shouldn't have met him, you shouldn't have got to know him, it's all your fault. And for the first time that night, you cry.

Your heart clenched at every thought of having to leave Heeseung, more tears falling at the fact that he's not gonna be a part of your life anymore. He's gone, and it's all your fault.

It's when you unpack your things when you realize you still have a bunch of things left at his place, you realize you never want to go back and face him.

You leave your stuff there for the next 2 days, your heart still unready to confront and be reminded of the fact that Heeseung is gone. Unfortunately, he has other plans.

Your phone lights up, and the last name you want to see is lighting the phone up.

'Hey... you left some of your stuff.'

You instantly turn your phone off, breaths picking up as you quickly look away from it and finish your lunch. You can feel the anxiety filling your body as you notice it light up once again, and it swarms in your chest even more when your mother winces at the next text.

You put down your spoon, quickly glancing at the text.

'If you want, you can come by and pick them up? I'll pack them for you...'

Your heart clenches yet once again, you know it's true, literally half your stuff is still there and you have to pick them up. You unlock your phone, quickly sending an 'okay' before completely shutting your phone down. You wouldn't stand a second more looking at his contact.

You decide to go at 11, because that's when the other members are at the company training. You don't know if Heeseung's gonna be there to give you your things, a part of you hopes he is, another hopes he's not there. But then again, who else would open the door for you?

You stand outside the familiar door nervously, picking on your nails and the lint on the hem of your cardigan. Just as you were about to knock, the door swung open, and instead of your ex boyfriend standing there it's the youngest of the group, his eyes wide and puffy lips parted.

As usual, he woke up late. You can't help but chuckle as he picks his shoes up and scurries down the stairs, bidding him a friendly goodbye.

You almost forget about Heeseung, but as you hear shuffling from inside, it all comes back.

You two share awkward glances, the tension slowly building itself back up. Instead of the heated, rage filled tension, this time the tension is guilty, and without each other knowing, yearning.

“T-this way,” Heeseung mutters tightly, eyes glued to the ground as he shuffled quickly to the living room. You follow along just a few seconds later, still processing the fact that this is the end. He could be gone out of your life after this, it’s your last chance to speak.

Your eyes slowly travel up when you stop, the beating of your heart quickening with the slight burning in your eyes. Lo and behold, there your things laid, ready for you to bring back home. You can’t help but notice how it’s packed completely how Heeseung would pack, neat and with care. It’s not too stuffed, it’s in the perfect place.

Biting at the dead skin of your lip, you trudge towards the duffle bag—his duffle bag—and kneel down to grab the handle. The moment you pick it up, you notice how the bag isn’t fully zipped, and a certain pink sleeve peaks out from the tiny space.

All too familiar, the pink sleeve was. It was the one he took from Daniel in I-land. He knew you loved it, for you loved the kid like your little brother. But, he can’t. It’s his, it’s his favorite, he can’t just give it to his ex.

You instantly place the bag down, the tears starting to well up in frustration and sadness. You zip open the bag and take the pink hoodie out, before shoving it into Heeseung’s chest, “Take it, Heeseung, Please don’t give it to me.”

It takes him a few moments, before Heeseung is shaking his head and handing it back to you. “No, it’s practically yours anyway. And you really like it right? It’s just a-“

“Don’t tell me it’s just a hoodie!”

You both are shocked at your sudden burst, frozen in your spot. Your breathing is heavy, like a weight is holding it down and slowing your breathing. There are tears keeping your cheek moist, warm, they stream down continuously, the sensation as if there was fire dripping from your eyes and burning your skin.

Heeseung’s just on the verge of crying himself, the grip on the pink hoodie deathly, he feels the material ripping against his skin. How did it come to this? When did it even happen? It all feels surreal, to think what you two had could fall apart.

All the happy moments in your relationship fading to memories, the hoodie representing the fact itself is true. None of you wanted to take it, afraid it would remind you of the other.

Deep down, you wanted to keep it, keep the memories it held, keep the tears that once soaked it when you vented all your stress to him, keep the scent of Heeseung that lingered on the fabric. You were just too afraid of being reminded that along with the happy memories, came the sad memories of the night you fought and broke it off.

Your grip on the poor hoodie eases, as you slide to the floor helplessly with tears messing your face up. You desperately wanted to hold the pink piece of clothing and keep it forever, and another part of you cursed at you for being too vulnerable.

Your hand quickly wipes away the tears on your cheeks and chin harshly, almost hitting yourself for being so sensitive. Before you could do the action again, a softer grasp is stopping your hand, Heeseung’s other hand reaching up to brush the tears away dearly, blowing your hair away from your face.

Before you could even bring yourself to stop, you’re already reacting to his touch, cowering into his hold and placing your hand over his on your cheek, almost intertwining them together.

“I’m sorry,” you whisper into his palm, your other hand reaching up to grasp at his t-shirt. You’re sorry for so many reasons, for not being careful, for all the things you said in the argument, for making a sudden commotion just because of a stupid hoodie. “I’m so sorry...”

“Shh, it’s alright, it’s alright.” Heeseung grabs you into his infamous embrace you would hate to leave, stroking your back with patterns just the way he knew you loved, just the way it would calm you down. “We’ll be alright.”

More tears fall between your eyelashes, dripping and soaking into Heeseung’s shoulder as he himself sniffles quietly into your hair. None of you want to leave each other behind, it’s the painful truth that you both can’t have, the truth you’ve always feared.

A sudden feeling of relief fills you up inside, his words reassure you in a way, we’ll be alright, you’ll be okay, it just had to leave his lips for you to believe it. You crawl closer to Heeseung, squeezing yourself in his bear hug, “We’ll be okay, we can make it right,”

A hoarse and hearty laugh leaves Heeseung, it shakes right by your ear as you press it against his chest, and he nods, “Yeah,”

He gently pulls your head back right in front of his, wiping the last of your tears and tucking the stray hairs back to the back of your ear, “Let’s just talk,” his whisper tickles your nose, causing you to lightly giggle at the feeling, his lips pressing softly against the pink tinted skin, “Make everything better?”

You nod, finally grasping at the pink hoodie and holding it tight to your chest as Heeseung laughs and bonks his forehead right on yours.

For the next few hours, you talk, make up, talk some more, maybe even a small cuddle, but that’s a secret. You make ramen for when the other members come back from practice, you feel happy to see the members thank you and eat with enthusiasm, you feel glad this is how your last moments together last.

Now you have the (practically ripped) pink hoodie in your arms as you bid the boys goodbye, slightly tearing up at the sight of them sadly waving, but you keep it in and continue your way back home, where you would tell your mom how you ended it on good terms.

And that night, you slip on the pink hoodie before you sleep, and you feel a piece of paper poking at your arm. You’re surprised to see a crumpled envelope poking out, your name written messily in blue ink.

You pull the envelope out quickly, opening it out with something bubbling in the pit of your stomach as you notice the handwriting as Heeseung’s.

‘My dear Y/n,

Hello there! I don’t know if i got the guts to make it right with you or if i pussied out and watched you as you drove away with regrets, but that’s what this letter is for. hopefully you didn’t throw this letter away hehe

i just wanted to thank you. for everything. your love, your care, your trust, Your happiness, thank you for everything you’ve given me. im sorry we had to end our journey, but know that you’ll be in my mind everyday. when we practice, I’ll remember your encouraging smile, when we win, I'll remember the fact that it’s you who gave me the courage to start this whole career.

i love you y/n. we’ll both probably find our other person in the future, but you’ll forever be in my heart as my first love, my first heartbreak, my best memory. thank you for helping me through my hardest times, thank you for helping the other boys through their worst times, especially jungwon, he’ll miss you the most.

i guess this is goodbye, y/n. not forever, of course, but for some time. thank you for everything, i hope you enjoyed the times we had together as much as i did.

with all the love in my heart,

Lee Heeseung :)’

You wipe at your tears for the nth time that day, folding the paper back into the envelope. “Fuck you Heeseung, you’ve ruined my makeup again!” You curse under your breath as you slip the letter into a certain box at the corner of your bedside table, patting your cheeks one last time.

You truly cherish the memories you had with Heeseung. You hope he does too.

[kmp78]

"Go talk to echies who've been around from the start and not listen to a granny who migrated from Justin beiber fanclub. If you knew half the shit these letos got up to you'd be cowering in the corner."

Cowering in the corner? Over some addiction and whoring with possible minors? Not a great image, agreed. But hardly something we haven't seen from every other rock band since the beginning of time...were they out there using their black painted nails to cut throats of infants? I just don't see what a couple of hooligans who got high and fucked around in their mid-life could have done that would shock me to that point. What do the forever echies know that they'll carry to their grave because "cult" master is the "messiah"...??

I'll just say this: when I posted that KROQ SFG clip on IG (and mind you that clip was almost 15 years old by that time), I actually got comments like "HOW CAN WE BE SURE THAT'S REALLY JL, SHE PROBABLY MANIPULATED THE CLIP!!! ".

So.... 🤦🏼‍♀️🤦🏼‍♀️🤦🏼‍♀️

I'm quite good at pic manips but AUDIO MANIPS? 😂

I'm not THAT good! 😂