#so if i were to vote it would be more on the basis of meta-ship factors

[synesindri]

i have no horse in the blackbonnet vs stucky race but i am kind of fascinated by it theoretically. politically, even. like yes stucky has a ton of history behind it but everyone is so sick of the mcu. but is it even strictly mcu or does it include comics etc too? how does one decide

[borisbubbles]

12. DENMARK

Rasmussen - “Higher ground” 9th place

Ok, so somehow, in a contest with a nautical theme, the one song which *literally* started with the line “Ships in the making, bound for a distant shore” never got to open any of the live shows??? ¿¿Que??

So, Denmark. Quite possible the opposite of my previous entry, yet its greatness is just as challenging to put into words? As much as “Taboo” was a inaccessible conglomeration of every possible fucking staging trick, so simple was “Higher Ground” It is a great song, but I find it hard to explain why. It is just so much fun? 

It’s like a chapter of the Edda Saga come to life, with its Old Norse chanting, banner-swaying and feigned-drunken slrrrrring uv wrrrrds creating a truly immersive atmosphere. (I love all things Norse, so I was never NOT going to stan this) I love how one of the backings looks like precisely like Conchita Wurst’s long-lost sister. I dunno, Higher Ground just shines on its own, without the need of convoluted gimmicks (tho still bless Malta’s souls for burying “Taboo” under them for no other reason than it (barely) fitting within their ad-funded budget <3). 

So it’s of no surprise that this ended up the Michał of the year, yes?

As you are well aware of, Eurovision is in a continuous process of ‘reinventing itself’, which is code for ‘rejecting its Euroschlager roots in favour of increasedly pallid Ultratop50 knock-offs’, like guuuuurls you can do better than that. Think of an entry in this year that was actually *original*. I come up with... “O Jardim”, “Mercy” and maybe “Hvala, ne!”? Congratz 3/43.  This shocking display of self-loathing creates a power vacuum for the few -for some godforsaken reason- critically panned Euroschlager anthems which *do* make it into Eurovision proper. As the only entry in this year (out of 43) which can be described as “classic eurovision schlager”, “Higher Ground was always going to attract a lot of attention. Add in a few clear-as-crystal references to Game of Thrones (Rasmussen is literally Tormund + guyliner and a weave), a ubiquitous Viking tone and just general dramatic badassery, you’ve found yourself an audience’s fave and the bane for any jury chairperson’s existence. 

This is the long explanation why “Higher ground” is actually a great entry. It is the only entrant, in a year so widely praised as the “first serious contest in years”, that actually feels traditionally Eurovision.  For a brief moment, we are hooked up on pure Classic Eurovision, the term often used to describe the time when “Eurovision Songs Were Still Good”. 

And yes, it is highly ironic (and tragic) that the one entry that reminds many of that very murkily defined time period venerated by the critics, is also one that was critically panned by crappy self-important jurors. Would it that jurors had any self-awareness (I’m pretty shocked the EBU were able to find 43 rooms big enough to house the jurors and their egos), but oh well.

I suppose this is where I address the Melofestivalen shit, yes?

So, the jist of it is this: Two Swedes write “Higher Ground” for Melodifestivalen and get brutally rejected by Christer for reasons I can only guess, as HG was far better than anything in Melfest this year.. (Christer = Melfest’s Jeff Probst). 

Considering that Denmark has a herstory of recycling past Swedish trends- omg reminder that the 1986 Danish entry was a frame-by-frame carbon copy of the 1985 Swedish entry 😂,  please enjoy the pictorial evidence I have provided in support of this statement

 ps: I love that the Danish entry was called “You are full of lies” so unselfaware, so meta, so Denmark <3 

but I digress. Anyway,

Considering that Denmark has a herstory of recycling past Swedish trends, they of course picked up the "Higher ground”, put it in DMGP, substituted the Swedish singer with a Danish one and voila! The melfest reject wins DMGP with his fingers up the nose, cementing his place amongst the canon as an audience darling, and YES scoring significantly better than Ingrosso in the televote 😍The discrepancy shown by televote wasn’t as hilar as “Colour of your life” rising from last to sixth with one sudden stroke (given that Sweden had a higher combined score than Denmark somehow 🙄) but whatever, the ending was perfect because much like the Edda, this Viking Saga also ended with the evil trickster getting swallowed by the World’s Serpent. Sorry, Christer, should’ve taken the LEEP LAKYU WERBWND; FRR HIYRRRR GRWWWWWWND!!!!!

RANKING SO FAR:

12. Denmark (Rasmussen - “Higher ground”)

13. Malta (Christabelle - “Taboo”)

14. Cyprus (Eleni Foureira - “Fuego”)

15. United Kingdom (SuRie - “Storm”)

16. Serbia (Balkanika - “Nova Deca”)

17. Portugal (Cláudia Pascoal - “O jardim”)

18. The Netherlands (Waylon - “Outlaw in ‘em”)

19. Ukraine (MÉLOVIN - “Under the ladder”)

20. Macedonia (Eye Cue - “Lost and Found”)

21. San Marino (Jessika ft. Jenifer Brening - “Who We Are”)

22. Sweden (Benjamin Ingrosso - “Dance You Off”)

23. Austria (Cesár Sampson - “Nobody but you”)

24. Latvia (Laura Rizzotto - “Funny girl”)

25. Azerbaijan (AISEL - “X my heart”)

26. Israel (Netta - “Toy”)

27. Norway (Alexander Rybak  - “That’s how you write a song”)

28. Montenegro (Vanja Radovanovic - “Inje”)

29. Armenia (Sevak Khanagyan - “Qami”)

30. Poland (Gromee ft. Lukas Meijer - “Light me up”)

31. Greece (Yianna Terzi - “Oniro mou”)

32. Georgia (Iriao - “For you”)

33. Belgium (Sennek - “A matter of time”)

34. Italy (Ermal Meta & Fabrizio Moro - “Non mi avete fatto niente)

35. Romania (The Humans - “Goodbye”)

36. Ireland (Ryan O'Shaughnessy - “Together”)

37. Croatia (Franka - “Crazy”)

38. Belarus (ALEKSEEV - “Forever”)

39. Russia (Julia Samoylova - “I Won’t Break”)

40. Spain (Amaia & Alfred - “Tu canción”)

41. Iceland (Ari Ólafsson - “Our choice”)

42. Australia (Jessica Mauboy - “We Got Love”)

43. Czech Republic (Mikolas Josef - “Lie to me”)

FOOTNOTES

1. I couldn’t really fit it into the narrative, but the actual reason why Rasmussen is only 12th and not higher is because I found the act kind of visually underwhelming. (the snow at the end is particularly sad) Like I said, the song is great and I often have it on loop, but the act is a bit too small for a stage that big.

2. That said, “Higher Ground” is by far the song I’ve listened to the most often this season, which bodes well for any future positive morphs when I rewatch this year in the distant future.

3. Rasmussen bombing with the jury probably has more to do with the lack of gimmicks than the genre of the song. Like I said, the song pretty much carries itself, so if you stop to ponder and list all the things great about it, it all boils down to “the song is catchy and fun”, which is not what juries look at (juries love intricate acts, layered complexity and technical finesse, none of which are particular strengths of this entry)

4. Yes, I think it’s MASSIVELY hypocritical to glom onto songs such as “A Matter of time” under the pretence of “It’s a good song” when yeah it was, but everything else was shit and then subsequently ignore “Higher Ground” for being “only a good song”. wtf.  

5. While I do enjoy trashing the juries on a regular basis, be aware that during the actual Jury Era of this show, none of the juries were professional. In fact, when I rewatched 1978 and 1985, both times the hosts were ADAMANT to remind the audience that the juries were in fact NOT professionals, but 10 randomly selected civilians (Celeb and non-Celeb) with no direct ties to the music industry whatsoever. This is precisely why entries such as Riva, Bucks Fizz and Toto Cotugno managed to win a ’jury vote’ with a comfortable lead lmfao imagine that happening now. Anyway, the bottom line is that today’s “five professionals” jury system fucking sucks and has to be swallowed by Jörmundgandr also. 

6. ’Eurovision used to be good before’ is such a weird statement, yet I hear it all the time in relation to the contest (by people of my age group????) Like... what exact years are you refering to, cuz like... the 2000s were trash and I can’t honestly think of a decade as consistently good as the 2010s lol? We haven’t had a weak year since 2012!! (but of course, most of the people I’ve talked about this in person have, by their own admission, not seen a year since 2010 so how would they know lol)

7. If we assume that 'Eurovision used to be good before’ refers to the time when Eurovision was song-centric, that doesn’t make a lick of sense either? If you’re old enough to remember the late 1960s your taste is probably irreconcilable with mine anyway. And yes, while it took until #London1977 before we finally got a ‘gimmicky’ year, this also made for one of the most watchable, consistently fun contests ever, -even to this day- while “song-centric” years like 74; 75 and 78 are grueling to sit through nowadays unless you have the taste of the average Söngvakeppnin voter. Gimmicks were a part of ESC even during the Chanson Era, as the language barrier was a massive hurdle for any song not sung in French. And true, the “gimmicks” then weren’t more than “performing barefoot” or “having a key change”, but good lord it’s the sixties, flat, boring French Chansons dominated and only because everyone fucking understood French, SO GRASPING AT STRAWS HERE.

 8. The funny thing is that Denmark didn’t copy Kikki Danielsson’s evergreen once, but twice. 😂 “Hallo Hallo” (DK1990) was just a repackaged “Du er fuld af løgn“ (DK1986), which as I said, was itself just a slightly different “Bra Vibrationer” (SW1985). It’s seriously some Bra Vibraception shit.

9. I will never stop shitting on Melfest 2018. It was pure Tropical House Torture and yes, Rasmussen > literally everything in that, including the entries I actually like (which were... Jessica Anderson, Ida Redig and... um... Edvard Blom? Rolandz? Margaret? Samir and Viktor???? *gunshot*) 😂/🙄@ rescinding their roots for 2014′s musical fade. Pray that Christer never discovers reggaeton - though who am I kidding, it will dominate ESC selections in 2020, bank on it.

10. Now that I’ve mentioned them, one of “Higher Grounds” songwriters (Niklas Arn) actually was the bass player for Rolandz (who were my second faves in the finale by fucking default). Robbed twice, both in Melfest and outside of it, smfh.

11. Oh and I think “Higher Ground” in the hands of Sweden, absolutely would’ve been guaranteed top five (watch how most of these “professional” jurors suddenly would *like* it because, you know, Melfest Winner) and that’s all the humiliation I need. That said, I doubt “Higher Ground” ever would have actually won Melfest (it has the Heartbreak Hotel “dominates televote, gets screwed over by juries” label stamped all over it) but oh well, that’s just because Melfest SUCKS and the “International Juries” are a fucking farce. So it worked out for the better that “Higher Ground” was in fact not in Melfest, I think. 

12. Rasmussen is actually the first Danish ESC contestant since Emmelie de Forest that I’ve liked. Gratz? 

[nightqueendany]

An In-Depth Look at Houses, Territories, and Loyalties

...That *May* Come into Play in Season 8

*Now, do I really think any of this relevant? No. But a certain ship in the fandom like to write long metas about how their fave girl is the key to every part of the Seven Kingdoms, how Westeros won’t be able to function unless she marries Jon and becomes queen. So these posts really serve no other purpose but to refute that.

My actual prediction for S8 is that the political drama with the North will last all of one scene and then everyone will get back to business. The show will gloss over the rest of the Seven Kingdoms in favor of long exciting fight scenes and by the end we’ll likely get a time jump and won’t even see how the politics of the South play out. But anyway, for argument’s sake, here you go...

This is coming to you guys in parts because otherwise it would be SUPER long.

So, here goes Part 1: THE NORTH

**Where do the loyalties lie after RLJ is revealed?**

The North (aside from House Stark):

Bolton: EXTINCT

Cerwyn: did not fight in BoB; kneels to Jon in 6x10

Glover: did not fight in BoB; kneels to Jon in 6x10

Hornwood: Fought in the Battle of the Bastards for House Stark

Mazin: show only; fought in the Battle of the Bastards for House Stark

Karstark: fought against Starks in BoB; Alys Karstark kneels to Jon in 7x01

Manderly: did not fight in BoB; kneels to Jon in 6x10

Mormont: Fought in the Battle of the Bastards for Starks

Reed: Lord’s whereabouts unknown though safe to assume still loyal to House Stark

Umber: fought against Starks in BoB; Ned Umber kneels to Jon in 7x01

Now, before I get into individual houses, let me start by saying this: For anyone wanting to dredge up the whole it’s not about *liking* their lords, it’s about the house they were sworn to, they swore to House Stark, Sansa is the new Head of House Stark after RLJ… Yes. That is perfectly true. After RLJ, Sansa is the new Head of House Stark because Jon is not a Stark, not even a Stark bastard. He’s a Targaryen. HOWEVER that’s the only thing that changes technically. Head of House Stark passes from Jon to Sansa in light of RLJ. But Jon’s being Warden of the North doesn’t need to change unless the Northern Lords call for it. Why? Because: 

**Jon was NEVER a Stark to begin with. He was elected King. No, there wasn’t a vote with tallies and such like the Night’s Watch. But his people named him King regardless of his name. So really, Jon’s position as Warden of the North is not dependent on his being a Stark. It never was.**

But the whole basis of Jon being “in danger” or Sansa being the new Queen in the North is obviously based on the assumption that the Northern Lords will want to cast Jon aside in light of RLJ. This is *possible*. Jon may even agree with them and say it’s not his place to be Warden of the North because he’s not a Stark or a Snow and that Sansa should be Wardeness. But even in such a scenario, there is absolutely no necessity for Sansa to be made a Queen. Under such a scenario a Stark will still rule the North as Warden. The idea of Sansa being named Queen is dependent on the Northern Lords and whether they crave their independence badly enough to go up against Dany...and whether they are loyal enough to Sansa to make such a bold move in the first place. Keep in mind, if the Northern Lords did do this, it would be seen as rebellion. Jon was their king. Their king bent the knee. They are honor bound to follow the man they named their king. RLJ doesn’t change that. So, who would be bold enough to want to call for such a rebellion? Let’s take a look at the individual Houses of the North:

Of the houses we know fairly well and have been mentioned in the show/lords we’ve seen on screen: Cerwin, Glover, Karstark, Manderly, Mormont, Reed, and Umber, only *Lord Glover* has voiced his possible regret in naming Jon King in the North instead of Sansa as his Queen. So it would make sense that Glover may not want Jon as his Warden after the RLJ reveal. Of course he’ll be upset Jon bent the knee to Dany. He may be upset Jon is actually a Targaryen. And he may suggest they spit on the pledge Jon made to Daenerys and instead name Sansa Queen. All of that is within the realm of possibility. So, the current score of House loyalties is Sansa 1 Jon 0.

Next we have Karstark and Umber. In 7x01, Lord Royce called for Karhold and Last Hearth to be torn down “with not a stone left standing.” Sansa, being the sensible one, correctly argued the North needed every castle they had for the war to come. However, she also argued that the castles should be given to new families, casting the Karstarks and Umbers from their ancestral homes. Jon, being the forgiving kind, decided against that. Ned Umber and Alys Karstark bent the knee to Jon and got to keep their homes. Now, in such a scenario where Lord Glover would call for the Northern Houses to rebel against Jon and Dany and name Sansa Queen, Ned and Alys have no reason to trust Sansa and no reason to want to name her their Queen. Their loyalties in such a scenario would undoubtedly lie with the man they bent the knee to regardless of his heritage: Jon. So current score is Sansa 1 Jon 2.

Cerwin and Manderly we haven’t heard from in S7. But they did kneel to Jon in 6x10 and they haven’t voiced opposition to him in S7. In light of RLJ, it’s unclear where they would stand. Manderly was fairly enthusiastic when he named Jon King, saying Jon avenged the Red Wedding, called him The White Wolf. It’s not a stretch to guess Manderly would be opposed to rebelling against Jon and Dany. Cerwin, we just don’t know. He did want to go back to his castle after the Battle of the Bastards, saying the war was won and Jon corrected him, mentioning the Night King. So to be generous, let’s say Cerwin would throw in with Glover and want to name Sansa Queen. Current score: Sansa 2 Jon 3.

Now, House Reed. This is gonna get interesting. No one knows where Howland Reed is at this point. Many theorists I’ve watched/read believe he’s on the Isle of Faces with the Order of the Green Men. Whether that’s true or not, doesn’t really matter. But remember, Howland Reed is the only living person aside from Bran and now Sam who knows Jon’s true heritage and has kept it a secret these twenty odd years. The other important person of House Reed is Meera...Bran’s traveling companion for the last several years. Meera has seen the army of the dead up close. She’s fought them. She knows what the true threat is. Meera won’t want to waste time with petty squabbles over whether the North remains independent or not. She won’t care that Jon is a Targaryen. She was loyal to Bran for years and knows how much Bran cares about Jon (or cared past tense as current Bran is an emotionless zombie). And Howland was loyal to Ned for years, keeping Jon’s secret. Neither Meera nor Howland have any ties to Sansa or have voiced their approval of her. So House Reed’s loyalties would likely be with JON even after RLJ. Score: Sansa 2 Jon 4

And last but not least, House Mormont. As stated in another post, Lyanna Mormont isn’t a fan of Sansa’s. In their first meeting in S6, she brings up Sansa’s past marriages...she also brings up Jon’s bastard status...but in 6x10 she says she doesn’t care that Jon is a bastard. She never says she doesn’t care that Sansa was married to Ramsay and Tyrion. So that may still be a sticking point with Lyanna. And of course, she names JON king instead of Sansa as Queen - the trueborn daughter of Ned Stark. Lyanna’s exact words are “I don’t care if [Jon’s] a bastard. Ned Stark’s blood runs through his veins.” Ned says something similar to Jon when they depart Winterfell back in S1. “You may not have my name, but you have my blood.” When RLJ is revealed, this is still true. Jon doesn’t automatically sprout blonde hair and purple eyes. He’s still Jon. He’s still the boy who was raised as Ned Stark’s bastard. The North may have an aversion to Targaryens, but Jon was not raised as one. And, out of all the Northern Houses, Lyanna as head of House Mormont has been the most consistent and most loyal to House Stark and to Jon. Hell, she’s even named after Jon’s MOTHER for goodness sake. If it came down to a divided North after RLJ, Lyanna would undoubtedly side with JON. She said, “he’s my king from this day, until his last day” and with her track record, she would likely stick to that. Lyanna may even be the one to suggest a marriage alliance between Jon and Daenerys so that he remains her king instead of simply Warden. Current score: Sansa 2 Jon 5

BUT WAIT. I’m forgetting some people aren’t I? There are more Northerners than just the Noble Houses of the North, aren’t there? That’s right. The Free Folk. If Glover called for rebelling against Jon and Dany in light of RLJ and Jon bending the knee and wanted to name Sansa Queen, though Jon has said he’s not the king of the Free Folk, they have stood by his side since S5. They defended his body when Jon was murdered by Alliser Thorne and co. They fought with Jon in the Battle of the Bastards. And they went to defend the Wall when Jon asked. Not to mention Daenerys swooping in and carrying Tormund to safety on the back of Drogon. If it came down to it, Tormund and the rest of the free folk wouldn’t stand for the Northerners casting Jon out simply because of his heritage. Like the Reeds, they know the threat everyone is facing. They’ve seen it. They’ve faced it, unlike the rest of the Northern Lords. They certainly don’t care about Sansa being a Queen and they definitely don’t care about Northern Independence when they still don’t even consider themselves part of the Seven Kingdoms. In a divided North, the Free Folk would support Jon. Final Score: Sansa 2 Jon 6.

So when it comes down to there being a “Key to the North”, Sansa Stark certainly is not it even in light of RLJ. The only Northern Lords she would have backing her claim and supporting her above Jon are few. AND if threatened or faced with a difficult situation like the dead climbing over the walls of Winterfell, fickle Lords like Glover would likely side with whoever could protect them. Nearly every other Northern House enthusiastically would still support JON and wish him to stay on as Warden...or again, call for a marriage alliance between Jon and Daenerys and settle for Sansa as Warden.

AND ALSO...If a few Lords of the North wanted to name Sansa their Queen and exile Jon or whatever...Sansa isn’t obligated to follow along. She could just as easily say, “Hey you *few* Northern Lords, you’re being idiots. Jon’s a Northman through and through regardless of who his trueborn father was. Daenerys came here to help us. We don’t have the armies to fight her for independence anyway. Shut up or go back to your castles alone and pray the dead don’t find you.”  But regardless, key lesson here is:

JON SNOW is the “Key to the North.”