#so i'm kinda nervous to publish it....but for now I'm just enjoying writing it

[standinginthedawn]

finally going back to work on the hakxyona fic I started last year, rereading it and blushing because ~phew~ I forgot how steamy it was...

I think instead of making it a one-off, I'm going to build it out into a three-chapter arc with the last one having the romantic tension come to a head

[normal-internet-user]

Howdy hey!!! :D

How are you doing today? I hope you’re doing fantastic ^^

May I perhaps request a silly lil Donnie x reader onshot? Anything fluffy!! Perhaps touch starved reader not knowing how to properly ask Donnie for hugs because of how hesitant he is with physical touch? Or, you could do anything!! I’m happy with everything you write <333

Thank you kindly for your time! Can’t wait to doodle something for you :3c 🔆💛🍋💫

OF COURSE! I can't wait to publish this for you! <33

DARLING DEAREST

♡~~♡~~♡~~♡~~♡

Summary: You want nothing more than to hold your lover, but you don't want to make him uncomfortable. All it takes is a little communication!<3

Warnings: Nope! Just fluffy fluff!

Requested: mhm! By the wonderful @sweaterrat !

No pronouns mentioned!

....................................

Gosh you just wanted to hold him.

You were currently sat across from Donnie as he rambled on about his current project. You hardly understood a word he was saying but he was speaking so excitedly you couldn't help but smile.

You was so cute all you wanted to hug him or hold his hand or- Gah just something!

But you didn't know how to ask if that was ok. What if you tried to initiate something and you made him uncomfortable?

That would make you feel so terrible. So you sat silently, hoping your self frustration was noticable.

But of course, Donnie was able to tell something was off as perceptive as he was.

"Is something wrong, Dove?" He asked, cutting his ranting short, "You look upset."

You shake your head, smiling softly, "No it's nothing just-" you hesitate for a minute, "It's nothing. Now what were you saying about the program?"

Donnie shook his head, rolling his chair away from his desk so he was infront of you, "Something's wrong. I know I'm not the best with feelings, but I read that communication is a key point in a relationship. So what's wrong?"

You sigh, fiddling with your fingers, "It's just- Gosh I don't know how to say this without being awkward-" You groaned, burying your face in your hands.

Donnie slowly took your hands and pulled them away from your face, and you blushed when he didn't let go.

"Then be awkward." He muttered, "I want to hear what you have to say."

"Well... It's kinda stupid-" you say, blushing brightly, then quietly mutter, "Can.. I have a hug?"

Donnie sat there for a moment, as though he was processing your words, then a small smile broke out on his face, and he giggled slightly.

You whined, and blushed harder, "Stop laughing at me you big jerk!"

Donnie shook his head, "No, I'm sorry. I'm not laughing at you, but that's what you were so nervous to bring up? You wanting a hug?"

"Well, I know you aren't the most comfortable with physical affection, and I didn't really know how to bring it up." you said, fiddling with your fingers, "I didn't wanna make you uncomfortable."

Donnie eyes grow softer, and he smiles, "Darling dearest, I believe we're both at fault here. A lack of proper communication if you will. I don't mind your affection, on the contrary, I like it actually." He blushed slightly as he said this, then continued, "I suppose, like you, I just didn't know how to bring it up."

"That being said, come here!" Donnie pulled you into his lap, and the blush on your cheeks was red to rival all other shades of red. You buried your head in Donnie's shoulder, giggling, and Donnie was thankful you couldn't see his flushed face.

He was flustered by his own forwardness, but he couldn't help but melt into your warmth.

"We should do this more often." Donnie muttered, "You're warm."

"Agreed." You said, grinning, "Wanna take a nap?"

Donnie hummed, and he stood, his arms wrapped around your thighs to hold in place against him while he moved the two of you too his room, where you proceeded to have the best nap of your life...

..................................

Just figured I'd post this before I dissappeared off the face of this website for another week, lol- I hope you enjoy my friend, and I'm sorry I took so long! <3

[wyked-ao3]

Writerly Questionnaire

About Me

When did you first start writing?

Started shortly before my 22nd birthday I'm 23 now...I had done a few attempt's before that but never posted them.

Are the genres/themes you enjoy reading different from the ones you write?

i love a variety of genres and hope to branch into other soon..I'm working on my first original story currently

Is there an author (or just a fellow writer!) you want to emulate, or one to whom you’re often compared?

everyone has their own style no two writers are just alike. I could list dozens of author's both published and not that I look up to. I have not been compared to anyone that I'm aware of.

Can you tell me a little about your writing space(s)? (Room, coffee shop, desk, etc.)

usually the couch. With my dogs and a blanket since I'm often cold.

What’s your most effective way to muster up some muse?

play some music or read something. If that doesn't work then I go back to what I have written and go okay what you crazy character's up to now

Did the place(s) you grew up in influence the people and places you write about?

🤔🧐

Are there any recurring themes in your writing, and if so, do they surprise you at all?

i tend to give traumatic backstories to at least one character in my books but usually it's a game of find the one who doesn't. I'm also prone to writing family drama 0_o

Do they surprise me? Not particularly since they are usually the characters I like most in a tv show

My Characters

Would you please tell me about your current favorite character? (Current WIP, past WIP, never used, etc.)

Oisìn for this book. Oisìn is a kind person with a bit of a quick temper, he is sarcastic but usually level headed unless you mention his hight Jade is the MC for the second book and my current favorite it might be the kicked puppy factor 0_o

Which of your characters do you think you’d be friends with in real life?

Adoh or Jade both are quiet but in different ways...

Which of your characters would you dislike the most if you met them?

0_o that be a long list lol, without giving spoilers Kia, Rhiannon, Nereza

Tell me about the process of coming up with of one, all, or any of your characters.

I think about what the storyline needs and they start knocking on the door and more show up as I write. Only a handful were planned out in great detail in advance and they kinda blew that out of the water, which is why I had to make new charts yesterday.

Do you notice any recurring themes/traits among your characters?

tragic backstories and loyalty with found family aspects.

My Writing

What’s your reason for writing?

i started writing my first fanfiction when I had a head cold I also edited and posted it during that time...it was what built up the confidence to post something lol, I can say that the next time I posted, I about had a nervous breakdown but now I'm not so nervous when I post. I suppose the reason I write is it is a form of connecting with other people and a escape from reality in a way.

Is there a specific comment or type of comment you find particularly motivating coming from your readers?

I love all comments i get even constructive criticism, as it tells me where I need to work on improving next.

How do you want to be thought of by those who read your work? (For example: as a literary genius, or as a writer who “gets” the human condition; as a talented worldbuilder, as a role model, etc.)

😵‍💫 nope just nope, social anxiety activated by a question

What do you feel is your greatest strength as a writer?

dialogue

What have you been frequently told your greatest writing strength is by others?

humour and dialogue

How do you feel about your own writing? (Answer in whatever way you interpret this question.)

I have improved a lot over the last few months but I still have a lot to learn :) I accept the fact that practice is required to get there, although I'm aware no one's writting is absolutely perfect although some are closer than others.

If you were the last person on earth and knew your writing would never be read by another human, would you still write?

yes. I like the stories I tell.

When you write, are you influenced by what others might enjoy reading, or do you write purely what you enjoy? If it’s a mix of the two, which holds the most influence?

its a bit of a mix but mostly what I enjoy reading but I do add way more punctuation for the readers. My writing style would probably cause people to have a breakdown, since it's mostly quotation marks for when they speak and nothing else perhaps a comma here or there if it seems to long. Then I go back through and edit it after I have finished writing the storyline.

Open tag from @the-golden-comet then tagged by @kaylinalexanderbooks adding in @ink-flavored (I'll fill out the other one soon I like the questions) @thecomfywriter

@sableglass

+open tag

[vacantgodling]

Hi, I hate to be a bother but is chapter 1 of Paramour (hope I'm spelling that right) the only chapter you've shared or are there more posted? your writing is so good and I've fallen in love with the story after seeing your anniversary art. Also, do you post it anywhere outside of Tumblr? unfortunately, the color scheme of your blog and the size of the font makes it hard for my poor eyesight to read (No hate to you btw I just zoom in real close)

hello hello!! firstly you are not at ALL a bother <3 (also you're spelling it right lol) regarding my desktop blog, i bumped up the font size so i hope that's helped it be a bit more readable? i'm planning on changing up color schemes and the like at the end of this year, but i hope the size change makes it more bearable ;3;

secondly, hearing that people like my writing enough to want to seek more of it has me giggling and kicking my feet so THANK YOU for enjoying chapter 1 and the art so much--there's some details that may or may not get added in whenever i eventually make a third pass at writing this behemoth and i spent 6 hours slaving over that drawing LMAO SO i really appreciate you reading it AND telling me you enjoyed it im so EEEE

at this time, i'm not formally publishing / putting out paramour because its still very much a work-in-progress (essentially, i'm working on draft 2 right now bc i'm doing some major outline renovating, but tbh i'm thinking that when i DO feel like i'm at the point that i want to publish it, i'm kinda leaning towards a serial style like @/stjohnstarling's what manner of man... but those are details for several years from now, i'm just rambling at this point) BUT FEAR NOT!! its my main obsession at all times and i have posted a TON about it on my blog. but for your convenience, i've compiled all the 'main' writing bits that i've posted on this blog over the past several years into this ask so that way if you wanna just read the 'main' meat and potatoes that i've decided to release from the vault so to speak... then here they are.

but, if in general you want to peruse my main wip tag, i talk about paramour so much its Ridiculous lmao -> s: paramour and you can check out the overview powerpoint intro i made for it here, just to get a clearer picture of what the heckie is going on lol -> powerpoint intro

anyway though, the list of main writings, broken into a couple of sections. i will also preface, that chapter 1 doesn't make it too apparent--but there is a LOT of sex, kink, and romance involved in this story. so proceed at your own disgression dear anon since i'm not sure how you feel about that lol.

MAIN WIP WRITINGS (in chronological story order)

paramour draft 2 chapter 1: pre-wedding

paramour (title drop 👀 but this scene is gonna end up slightly different in draft 2)

midnight query (amon and erecia talk in some undetermined chapter)

the bird & the worm (flashback to amon at 12)

but i am not (a bit from chapter 9 of draft 1)

masquerade (the first time hya and amon fuck—there is smut proceed with caution. also the latter half of chapter 9 draft 1)

an invitation (excerpt from chapter 10 draft 1)

displeasure (a relationship snippet from an undetermined chapter)

nervous (just hya and amon being kinky)

ties that bind (kink interrupted by feelings from some undetermined chapter)

divine (some sappy shit from an undetermined chapter)

hiccup (excerpt from chapter 20 of draft 1)

AUS & JUST FOR FUNZIES (meaning not in the main wip)

jealousy (amon & hya slums au—where both of them grow up in central halifax)

pleasure (amon’s birthday present 2023-> this is sex/smut so proceed with caution)

a fool’s errand (role swap au—aka the au where amon is rich and hya is the butler)

laundry (role swap au)

wedding invitation (role swap au—amon being friends with myrtus makes me insane actually)

i know what you’re saying (amon & hya slums au)

[bookwyrminspiration]

Call me out if I’m wrong here, but I feel like sometimes, when you’re in this fandom, there’s a lot of contradictory?

I feel like not that long ago people were upset that others were saying they didn’t like something, so wording changed.

I do believe that we should be honest on whether or not we like something (while being kind/gracious about it), but that might be the reason why some people are more nervous to just come out and say it?

Again I may be so incredibly wrong; I’ve been dipping my toes in and out of the fandom for a while now.

I think you have a valid point. There's a lot of people in the fandom, and we have different opinions, some of which contradict each other. Sometimes one view dominates, then the other. We vacillate and change, which is only natural.

Regarding the recent wording change, I'm not sure what specific thing that was in response to--there was some conversation in the vein of "if you don't like it, why are you here?" Which was more in response to the overwhelming negativity the series has started to accrue with the long interims, its current direction, and fans getting older. The sort of "people don't want to hear about how much you hate the thing they love." Even if you've established yourself as a fan of it previously.

Which I think can coexist alongside simply saying you don't like something. I can say the new cover isn't really hitting for me without tearing it apart and making those who really enjoy it feel bad, you know? I don't mind it, understand why it's like that, and appreciate Jason Chan's artistic prowess, but that doesn't make it interesting to look at.

But you're right, there's been this push to justify why you dislike things, at least in online spaces. So it's harder/makes people nervous to say "I just don't like this." Myself included. Instead it's "this was rushed" "this was last minute" "Shannon's publishers are pressuring her" "her editor's are pressuring her" etc.

Which, again, is entirely possible. Writing and publishing is hard; it takes a lot of work and pleasing the industry isn't easy. But there are points where--I think--people approach it with bad faith.

To use the cover as an example again, a lot of people are saying it's rushed. Possible. But is there a history of rushing covers? Not that we've seen, all the others have been spectacular, detailed, and thorough. What would they gain by rushing it? They could meet deadlines sooner, have something to share with the audience since we're in a weird period. But they could also damage their marketing with a subpar product, especially given the series' popularity. Why do we think the cover looks rushed? Its simplicity, its different mood. But, again, Shannon said that was intentional. There's Keefe's appearance, which is really hit or miss for people. I don't think Keefe not looking as attractive as people imagine/want is a result of rushing, but because there's an impossible standard for him as The Boy of the series. And so on and so forth.

The point of that being we've come to this conclusion, I think, hastily. While book 9.5 wasn't the original plan so of course timelines change, I don't think S&S has a history or motive to rush. There's already an established precedent for delays when necessary, the cover came out later than others, and there's (i think) a solid, purposeful reason the mood is different.

Could I be wrong? Absolutely. But the rapidity of the conclusion and with how much it feels we've been outsourcing our dislike the past few years I'm started to feel a little skeptical. Boy who cried wolf kinda thing. Was it rushed again, or do we just not like it? Feels like a slapstick explanation without further examination

And of course you don't have to analyze everything, but some things are a bit more complex, you know?

Point is: I think we're overusing these explanations (pressured, rushed) and at this point if we don't delve further into it it starts to lose its meaning. There is an argument for being rushed and pressured! But without getting into it, I can't tell if we're thinking it through or just avoiding saying we don't like something for fear of judgment/reprisal.

[sighonaraa]

Answer the questions and tag five fanfiction authors you know!

Tagged by the wonderful @lady-of-the-spirit and the lovely @kvetchinglyneurotic and the incredible @altschmerzes!! thank you guys <3

1. How many fandoms have you written in?

3 (ted lasso, daredevil, and thor & loki which i'm counting as one)! but i have a lotta fics in the works for different fandoms ESPECIALLY as of now the bear. because. if you've been on or near my blog lately. You Know.

2. How many years have you been writing fanfiction?

writing fanfiction? probably since i was like 11/12, so 8 or 9 years. but that was just for goofy fun in my google docs. i didn't publish my first Actual fic till just last year in fact!!

3. Do you read or write more fanfiction?

i think i go through like... idk, waves or something? when i first watch/read something that Sparks The Brain, i'll devour all the fic i can tailored to my interests/character dynamics/etc. but then i usually start writing and once i do that i read fic a loooooot more sporadically and i'll go through long periods of not reading any fic, just writing my own and re-watching/re-reading the source material.

4. What is one way you've improved as a writer?

hmmmmmm. Hmmmmmmmmm. i think that writing fic has allowed me to get more comfortable with writing platonic intimacy and affection and love? i've always wanted to, but there's so much amatonormativity (no, autocorrect, i don't mean noninflammatory JDKLFJ) in the world and especially in fandom spaces that it always felt like. idk. something that i Shouldn't be writing, i guess? but entering into the fandom space myself and engaging with other incredible lovely brilliant creators has given me SUCH a boost in terms of like. really leaning into what i love writing because it is important and good and true and necessary.

5. What's the weirdest topic you researched for a writing project?

for the mom city fix it, i had to do a lot of research about funeral planning in london specifically, and it was really reaaallyyyyy hard because apparently every single place has different laws and rules about what you can do, what you can't do, et cetera. i was trying to figure out how jamie could just like. Not. have to deal with that. and i finally stumbled across the possibility of public health funerals, which was so perfect and only took ten hours of me frantically googling "what do you DO if a family member DIES and you HATE THEM".

6. What's your favourite type of comment to receive on your work?

is it cheating to say any and all? because it's true! but i do have a special place in my heart for comments that pull out specific lines and react to them they're very :') to me.

7. What's the most fringe trope/topic you write about?

i feel like in the general Fandomness of fandom gen affection/love/intimacy tends to be sparse? i'm so so lucky to have found people here that enjoy those types of stories as much as i do but. i guess they would still kinda be considered fringe to most.

8. What is the hardest type of story for you to write?

happy stories? where nothing goes wrong?? Who Is She

9. What is the easiest type?

it's not like. EASY easy because it often ends with me clawing out my hair but. more often than not my fics will quickly spill over from "ooh a 2k one-shot" to "HOLY FUCK the sub-plots are multiplying". and those longer fics often come more naturally and tend to be more introspective, messy, full of emotion.

10. Where do you do your writing? What platform? When?

i toggle back and forth between google docs, scrivener, and my phone notes app! and i do most of my writing like. whenever, i suppose? we've got a couch by three big ol' windows and i love sitting there bc i can look out and there's so much natural light. unfortunately, i think most of my Best writing happens at the beautiful sexy hours of 2 in the morning.

11. What is something you've been too nervous/intimidated to write, but would love to write one day?

i really want to write like. something explicitly Whump-related, i suppose? i think a lot of my fics have definitely done the emotional whump side of things, but i want to do a fic that's also got the physical whump. luckily i have a bad things happen bingo card now, so! we shall see where the tides of fate take me!

12. What made you choose your username?

oh my god. [buries face in hands]. embarrassing. when i was twelve and didn't have tumblr yet i decided that when i One Day did have an account it was going to be 'sighonara' because. haha. sayonara but SIGHonara . puntastic. and then when it did come time to make my tumblr account that idea had kinda stuck so i was just like. might as well! and i'm not displeased with that tbh. feels good feels right.

i'm doing this so late that i'm not sure who's been tagged and who hasn't so! feel free to ignore this if you've already gotten it (or if you just. don't want to do it which is so fair <3)! @thirteenemeraldcats, @jamietarttsnorthernattitude, @orbitalpirate, @anguishmacgyver, @roughroadhaley, @eluvion, and @jamietxrtt!!

[triskhellion]

20 Questions for fic writers

Tagged by @dear-massacre

1. How many works do you have on AO3?

Twenty-one. Twenty fics and one weird standalone soundtrack, lol.

2. What’s your total AO3 word count?

195,750.

3. What fandoms do you write for?

Just Teen Wolf so far, but I maybe I'll get around to some ideas I have for The Sandman or something else one day.

4. What are your top 5 fics by kudos?

Thunder (Sterek. 12.1k. Explicit. Depressed loner Derek meets on-the-run Werefox/Kitsune Stiles in rural Montana.)

The Cold Moon (Sterek, 40.6k. Explicit. Part one of a story where Stiles is forced across a mysterious boundary by Hunters and encounters a semi-feral Alpha Derek. My first published fic.)

Second Chance Strays (Sterek, 8.5k. Explicit. Mage Stiles, Derek, & Larem the deer alone in the wilderness. A Fuck or Die situation ensues when a darach attacks.)

CLAIM! (Sterek, 11.9k, Explicit. Misunderstandings and making up after Derek & Stiles meet at Jungle and hook-up.)

Customer Service (Sterek, 10.9k. Explicit. Surly barista omega Derek and human college student Stiles. Banter, vulgar latte art, and heat sex. Dominant Derek, Service Top Stiles.)

5. Do you respond to comments? Why or why not?

Yes! Sometimes it takes a while, but comments are appreciated and I know I like getting responses.

6. What is the fic you wrote with the angstiest ending?

I guess Amīca (Derissa) because it's an unresolved pre-relationship fic that's meant to be the first In a series. I've been a happy ending gal, so no real angsty ones so far. The angst is in the beginning and/or middle!

7. What’s the fic you wrote with the happiest ending?

The rest of them? 😂

8. Do you get hate on fics?

I haven't yet. Knocks on wood.

9. Do you write smut? If so, what kind?

Yes. Most of my fics have smut at some point, lol. Or belong to series that do/will.

Um, barebacking and creampie/breeding. Cum eating or play and marking in general, including hickeys and biting.

Virgin/first time bottoming, praise kink, light degradation, and knotting are also in a number of stories. Some spanking, bondage and pinning, and generally low-key dominance and submission. Chasing and claiming and a few omegaverse or just self-lubrication. (I have plans for more.)

All M/M or M/M/M so far, but I have WIPs and notes with other combinations. I have a bunch of Kinktober bits from 2022 to turn into fics that I'm both nervous and excited about. And lots of other ideas too.

10. Do you write crossovers? What’s the craziest one you’ve written?

Not yet, but I have a summary for a Sterek Teen Wolf/The Sandman crossover.

11. Have you ever had a fic stolen?

Not that I'm aware of.

12. Have you ever had a fic translated?

Nope.

13. Have you ever co-written a fic before?

No. Sounds both fun and kinda scary.

14. What’s your all time favourite ship?

Sterek is what finally got me into fanfiction and the whole shipping fandom thing a few years ago, so I gotta go with them. I enjoy a bunch of others from Teen Wolf too (especially Steter, Stetopher, and Sterek + various people) and from other fandoms.

15. What’s a WIP you want to finish but doubt you ever will?

I currently intend to finish all my WIPs, but who knows what the future will hold. I have 3 posted WIPs that I definitely plan to complete: The Wolf Moon, The Depths, and 15 Shades of Red. I have dozens of unposted ones that I also hope to finish...eventually.

16. What are your writing strengths?

Apparently dialogue, world building, characters' inner thoughts, and being funny sometimes. Coming up with ideas.

17. What are your writing weaknesses?

Epithets. It's just tricky when the characters have the same pronouns and I hate writing their names over and over. (I don't mind when other people do it though, so 🤷🏽‍♀️. But then I'll be like, "I can't say Derek three times in this paragraph!")

I've started looking for ones to remove whenever I edit now (and I'm cringing thinking about earlier stories that I should re-edit at some point,) but I still use some and am self-conscious about it.

Also, sometimes I info dump, but that doesn't bother me so much. Boom, here's a bunch of background now let's get on with it, lol.

18. Thoughts on writing dialogue in another language in fic?

I've used a few words in Polish here and there in some stories, but I probably wouldn't try to write whole conversations in another language unless I was familiar with it or could ask someone about it.

There's some Patois/Patwah in Irie, which was interesting to write because there's no one set spelling of many words, so it was part looking at common ones and part "What did it sound like/how was it phrased when this relative or family friend said something like this?"

19. First fandom you wrote for?

I vaguely recall thinking up scenes, dialogue, background, etc, for a story with Byakuya Kuchiki/Shūhei Hisagi from Bleach approximately 5 billion years ago when I was a teenager, but I don't remember if I ever actually wrote anything. Definitely didn't finish or publish anything. So...Teen Wolf.

20. Favourite fic you’ve written?

Hmm. I can't say that I have a favorite. I only started actually writing from my list of fic ideas around 16 months ago, IIRC. Maybe if I look back on them all after enough time passes I'll be able to pick one out (though knowing me...still probably not,) but right now they're all just...floating around in my head and also mixed with the particular experiences of writing them, idk.

Here's a recent one that was fun to write:

Legs (Sterek, 4.3k. Explicit. Snark and smut after college students Derek and Werecreature Stiles cross paths at the mall.)

If you want to play along, tag, you're it!

[di-diwata]

the nerves thing is so true! i've been writing fanfiction for around 3 years myself but most of the time i never even get around to posting it. but the thing you said about the feeling never really going away actually kinda struck me because like yeah everyone feels nervous but you can still push through!!

i'm actually considering making a sideblog for posts about the outcasts smp now. i'll let you know the url once i make it if you want :)

i really like myles and wenzo too! the lengths they go to to get at each other are hilarious and the shenanigans are so fun to watch <3

i absolutely love all the stuff with meep!! him and clyde are so iconic lmao and tazoh is really awesome! i think one of his videos (the one where he restores spawn) was the reason why i started watching the smp in the first place actually! astelina is also amazing btww i was so sad when i heard she isn't gonna be in season 2 :( but i respect the creators' decisions and i'll still continue to watch her content that isnt related to the outcasts because she's really fun!

cheif's echocraft stuff is great! i honestly can't get enough of the video where he steals everyone's shoes haha (i've shown it to like 3 people and watched it with them but somehow it still hasn't gotten old) but you should definitely check out his outcasts stuff!! i think it's all pretty cool :D

Writing fan fiction and never publishing it is great! But yeah, the nerves arn't good. I've found that publishing my fics and stuff on anon help with the nerves a little. You can publish it but no one can connect it back to you! but yeah, sometimes you just have to push through it and hope for the best.

Awesome! If you do end up making it then i'd love to have the URL. I can never have too much Outcasts smp on my dash.

The shenanigans Myles and Wenzo get up to are very fun; its a constant game of one upping each other to see who can do the craziest thing. Those two are my go-to if i need a good laugh.

Tazoh and his dedication to Meep is awesome! It's the whole world against him sometimes yet he never gives up! Honestly i think Meep might be one of my favourite minecraft pets ever.

Astelina is fantastic! It was one of her videos that got me into outcasts in the first place.

I hadn't know she was leaving D: when did the announce that? either way, like you said, respect the creators decisions. Hope she enjoys whatever project she decides to do next.

Echocraft is one of my favourite smps (easily in my top five), and Cheif's shoe video is just a blast! Honestly all his videos are great, but that one has a special sense of absurdity to it. I also really like his video where he finds Branzy's donkey (although i can't remember if that was Echocraft or not..).

I've been meaning to get round to watch his Outcasts! However my interests have been lying else where recently and I just havn't got the chance to. It's definitely in my watch list though! All his videos are fun so I'm excited to see what he's been up to.

[claudiajcregg]

I love these! (Doing and asking :) 🙅‍♀️ 🤔 🏅☀️

Grrr. Tumblr ate the mostly written post because of course it did. Thank you for asking, Mia 💕 These were really fun to answer (and also hard). For someone who's really her worst critic, I do enjoy talking about my process and whatnot. I'm sorry in advance for all the rambling.

(If you want to ask me more, the questions are here ✨ )

🙅‍♀️ What is one trope you refuse to ever write?

I just don't see myself doing incest or bestiality. If we're talking more general things, I can't see myself writing cheating (with the asterisk of this being one member of the couple straying, and that there are possible situations where I wouldn't mind). Also, anything extremely violent, mostly because it's not something I often consume in media.

🤔 What’s one genre you’ve never written that you’d like to try?

Oh, maybe action and/or suspense? My writing style (intimate moments, conversations, just vibes) is not the most compatible, but if the situation arose... Sure! (I guess that, in a past life, I wrote around mysteries and crime and whatnot. I was too young then 😬 )

I also would love to be better at writing stories-within-stories. I absolutely do not have the talent to convincingly seem like the talented writers I'm doing. (Once again thinking of the fluffy memoir fic. And another one, which has a super fun premise, but my writing is failing it with this aspect, I fear.)

And not a genre specifically but collaboration? Again, I have super talented friends. I'd stick out like a sore thumb. I think it'd be fun!

🏅 What is the fic you’re most proud of?

I am my own worst critic but I would still probably say all of them, maybe? I saw something in them that I thought might connect with others and that's why they're out there. Even the ones that aren't (so many of them) and might never see the light of day. Writing isn't easy. It makes me nervous and makes me crave validation.

Anyway. The pageant answer is still true but as for actual ones, but using the way I would mentally refer to them, lol.

Big Block of Cheese 2008. I just saw it's at almost 100 kudos... excuse me what. I just felt it was something special from the moment I wrote it. I think I always would've posted it at some point, even if I hadn't made friends. None of my fics come close to it in terms of "love" and tbh, I'm fine with it.

St. Augustine. Just because it came to me so fast (I think it was mostly written in a morning?) and IDK, I love the scene. This one has broken out from most of my other purely CJD stories, whether it was timing or it getting recommended by the right people. It was nerve wracking writing something pre-canon but I think it went well! It was fun to write. I haven't read it in forever so I reserve the right to remove it from the list.

Obviously, star shine started it all but if I had a third spot... Portland. It's probably one of my flops (everything is, but this one especially) and yet. I recall being so proud right after I finished it and wanting people to read it. (It obviously grew since then because I can't shut up.) It's long, maybe unnecessarily so, but god does it get to me. I was in a writing rut (see next answer) and challenged myself to write 'canon' stories, and I think the two are good.

But... To be honest, the answer has to be my unposted multichapter. I always think it's bad until I read it, and it kinda hits, all imperfections aside. 150k words in 5-and-a-bit months (26/3 to 2/9?), 33 chapters. I wrote 2/3 of that in two months (with 19 being the last one I wrote before 19/5), until my muse decided she was done and I decided to actually change jobs. (I also wrote now-published fics like haunted by the notion or don't want you to go, as well as a bunch of other smaller ones, in between! WTF was I on in 2021? I think the mini reunion altered my brain chemistry.) I've considered just dropping a link to the unedited, unbetaed drive on the server one day, ngl.

ANYWAY. Too long-winded!

☀️ Has anyone ever left you a comment that made your day? What did it say?

UM. All of them? real talk here, I don't get many comments so I love them all. I write for a show that ended 17 years ago, for a small (and surprisingly divisive) ship (their loss - there's so much talent) so I should've known going in. It took me some time to internalize it. I'm also not that good a writer, so I'll take it. Comments mean the world to me, even if it's a "lovely" or "great job." Just taking a few seconds means a lot and writers aren't kidding when they say it's motivating. It's also how I've made friends in the fandom so yeah! comments!

To highlight some rather recent ones!

Haunted by the notion got so many from so different people, and they were all so incredibly nice when I was terrified. All of those broke me, and might be the reason why I've been struggling with a followup! (And why I've been wanting to post again soon, rather than wait.) From the other stories, I have two ~recent ones~ I actually bookmarked because they broke me.

miabicicletta's (💕 ) on St. Augustine. I woke up on a Saturday and I remember reading it from bed and crying. It was so incredibly kind and lovely and I couldn't remember the last time anyone had written anything as long. I still think about it all the time. 🥂 (I've now realized Steph also wrote another lovely one ♥️ That story and the love it got, man.)

krazykitkat's on all's well + her comment on St. Augustine because her stories are some of my favorites. I couldn't believe that someone whose work I adored and have read countless times since I finished the show six years ago had read one of my stories, but had liked it???? Didn't compute. Doesn't compute. She's read many since (see St. Augustine, the most recent one), commented and left kudos on a bunch, and it still... blows my mind. (This one happened while I was flying back from Stockholm and was the first thing I saw when I landed.)

But really - so many people have left so many kind messages over the last couple of years, and I've probably gotten emotional at all of them. That there are people out there who are reading the silly little stories that have come out of my brain... wonders never cease.

[silvermuffins]

Kinda chewing on something lately...

I write. I'm not all that great a writer, but I write. I write with minimal editing, feedback, or anything. I hit publish and don't look back. This is not born of confidence.

This is new. I've never actually done much fanfic writing before, so nervous about my own skill, that nobody would like it, that I couldn't even put words to paper. Scared that I'd waste my time, and be hurt for trying. But now I do it anyway.

I have a few things under my belt, now, and I still don't think I'm all that good. But I still write without much planning and publish without looking back, because maybe it's fine to not be very good. Maybe it's enough to just have a few words of my own to share with the world. And if most people pass them by, that's fine. Maybe they'll find their way to someone who needs them, or who at least enjoys them.

I'm finding it's enough if only one person likes them.

Wayside flowers often go overlooked, but are quite pretty anyway. The sun sets every day, yet I was always one to stop and notice the sky. Maybe not everything has to have some deep meaning, or a grand purpose. Maybe the glory and grandeur of the sunset was painted for me alone, because I would stop to look.

Maybe the words I put on a page are just words. Maybe they're just words, even to me, and maybe I hate them. If I look back I see every blunder and failure and misstep. So I write without looking back.

But maybe to someone else, who can only see my design as my page communicates it, who has no clue of the misalignment or loose ends, my words are much more. One person in all the world for whom the sun sets. And there is beauty in that, too - there is decadence.

And that is enough.

[zepskies]

Girl same! 🤣

The first friggin' line got an honest-to-goodness dreamy sigh outta me. You hold a lotta power, ma'am! xD<3

You're so sweet, thank you!! I'm glad I was able to deliver on the steamy fluff. 💓

The pride Dean feels for Mr. District Attorney. Oh, my heart.

Haha always!! Dean's so proud of his giant lil' bro. ❣️

Dean not taking her praise easily and being humble in his response--ugh, yes. <3

We love a humble man. 🥰

The inclusion of pie was executed brilliantly.

Haha thank you, lovely!! I thought it was fitting, in a "Joey doesn't share food" kinda way. 😂

Dean being flustered while she's not even around. Gah, it's like you were out for blood. xD<3 ...I thought that was overwhelming (in the best way, of course), and then things just kept going.

Hahaaa the reader isn't the only one catching feelings. 😏 But yeah, onto some drama here...

I found myself genuinely, viscerally nervous once the call came in. I was really not prepared to see our boy get hurt. And while I was worried about his physical safety, you came in from my blindside and knocked me out with his emotional torment. I was so relieved when Dean (and his team) made it out safely, but then that peace was quickly snatched away by the death of the dad. Supreme work. Supreme. So few published novels have made me feel like that.

That compliment truly touches me, thank you so much! 🥹🥹🥹 Yeah in this chapter I wanted to focus on the emotional impact of these kinds of calls, especially as this one hits home for Dean.

His mind was blank. Right now, he couldn’t think of a damn thing flirtatious, or charming, or even human enough to say to you. This just felt so real. Like something I never knew could be put into words.

Thank you, lovely. Thank you for shouting out this line, because it was my favorite one to write for this chapter. 💕💕

Aside from the love story, I wanted to try my best to capture what first responders deal with and how they're forced to cope. Ones of my uncles was a firefighter for over 30 years, and another was a police officer, so my heart truly does go out to them. ❤️‍🩹

And I was on the edge of my seat, hope-hope-hoping that a little hurt/comfort would find its way to me, and it did! He called her, and she knew, and she held firm and lightened his mood a bit. (Kudos for the "knuckle-dunk" line, by the way. ;D)

I love me some hurt/comfort! Even if it was over the phone, I'm glad you enjoyed it. The reader's a smart girl, and she picked up on the change in his voice. (And lmao thank you for catching the Big Sky reference there. 😜❤️‍🔥)

It was my pleasure to deliver this "serving of pain" with a side of hurt/comfort, friend! Thanks so much for your lovely thoughts, as always!!

Smoke Eater - Part 5

Pairing: Firefighter!Dean Winchester x F. Reader 

Summary: Dean Winchester is the cocky, but well-respected Lieutenant at Firehouse 25. He leads by example, but he’s also known to break a few hearts. He’s starting to crave something he’s never had, though. Something stable. Something real. 

That’s when he meets you, on a truly terrible day, trapped in a rickety old elevator.   

🔥Series Masterlist

Word Count: 5,000 Tags/Warnings: Fluff, house fire, perilous situations, angst, hurt/comfort 

Part 5: “Twitterpated”

“Hey there, beautiful,” Dean said.

His voice alone was enough to cause a shiver tingling down your spine.

You couldn’t help but giggle as he once again drew you into a kiss. He held you close by the waist. Feeling his hands spanning your lower back was doing things to you, but you knew you had to keep a level head here.

“Dean,” you said. Your lips curved against his. “We’ve said hello about three times now.”

“Wanna make it four?” he suggested. His voice was deep as sin.

Damn this man, you thought. He was a professional flirt.

But you laughed, and he smirked at the sound. He resisted letting you go when you playfully tried to pull away. The two of you were standing in the middle of your small office, in front of your desk at work. A large bag of takeout was perched on your desk, but neither of you cared about food just yet.

Dean liked the look of you in your navy blouse, tucked into a trim pair of pants, down to your smart heels.

“Tell me you didn’t go up all 20-something flights of stairs in those daggers you got on,” he remarked.

You followed his gaze down to your heels.

“Oh no,” you said. “I’ve got a backup pair of sneakers that I came to work in. Then I slip these on behind my desk. No one���s the wiser.”

Dean enjoyed that playful little smirk you gave him. He still couldn’t believe you’d walked all those stairs, but he guessed he couldn’t begrudge you for your lingering fear of elevators.

“Yeah? What else do you get up to behind that desk? Besides work, that is,” he teased. You guffawed and playfully hit his arm.

He chuckled and finally released you. You’d already dragged a spare chair next to yours behind your desk, so he began helping you unearth the various containers in the bag he brought. All the while, he surreptitiously took an inventory of your office.

It was all very neat and organized, just like you. You had a large window right behind you, which let in some much-needed natural light. There were tile floors, like the rest of the building, but while your desk was an old wood, clunky thing, you had a double monitor setup with an organized file system on either side.

As you pushed things aside and made room for the food, Dean noted the way stray pieces of hair fell from your clip, framing your face. He itched to take that clip out and make that hair wild, maybe even wrapping it around his hand.

Instead, he reached out and tucked a few strands behind your ear. It earned your attention with a soft blush.

“What?” you asked.

“Nothin’,” he grinned. He was treated to one of your shy smiles as you continued in your task.

Soon you and Dean were once again sharing good food and conversation. You explained what you did for work, being a Senior Sales Representative at Savage & Co. He listened, offering interjections here and there: gems like, Josh sounds like a fucking idiot. And, so does your boss. You couldn’t disagree.

In the back of your mind, it was still a bit strange for Dean to be in your office. It felt rather intimate for a second date, but you supposed coming to your place of work wasn’t so new to him.

“You sure are killing that chicken,” Dean remarked, as he watched you carve into a large drumstick with fork and knife. He shot you a teasing smile. “You know it’s already dead, right?”   

You gave him a dry look, despite your amusement. “I’m starving! All I’ve had today is a cup of coffee.” 

He frowned at that. “What, you can’t take a break for an egg McMuffin?”

“Ha!” you cracked, and took a sip of lemonade. “There are no breaks around here.”

Dean hummed, though you could see he didn’t like it.

“You sound like Sam,” he said.

“Oh, your brother?”

“Yeah, Mr. District Attorney,” Dean said in a mocking voice. But his smile betrayed his fondness, and his pride for his younger brother’s accomplishments.

You remembered then that Dean’s father was a police officer as well—a real life homicide detective! You ruminated on that when you and Dean moved on to dessert. You had a scoop of frozen yogurt, while he started to dig into a slice of blueberry pie.

“You know, it’s amazing to me that your entire family went into public service, from all angles,” you said. “It’s impressive…and really noble, actually.”

Dean offered you a quirk of a smile. It told you he wasn’t typically one to be comfortable with praise, as he carded a hand through his hair.

“Yeah, well. It’s a living,” was all he said.

You shook your head with a smile. His humility seemed genuine, and you found it endearing as hell.

“And you’re the eldest, right?” you asked. Dean nodded around a mouthful of pie. He set down the little tray between you for a moment.

“Yeah, though you wouldn’t know it looking at my brother. Around sixteen, he shot up like a damn weed. Friggin’ gigantor.”

You giggled at the image. Now you were truly intrigued, and hoped to meet both Sam and Dean’s father in the future. Though for right now, you glanced down at the slice of pie resting between you, all glossy blueberry filling and flaky crust.

You raised your cup of frozen yogurt to him. “Wanna try a bit of this, so I can try a bit of that?”

You went for a piece of pie with your fork, but Dean snatched the tray out of reach. He eyed you with a bit of admonishment.

“Hey, now. I got you your fake ice cream or whatever,” he said. You rose brow at him, both incredulous and amused.

“What, you won’t share with me?” you asked.

A smile twitched at his lips, but he stayed firm.

“Sweetheart, I’ll get you whatever you want, but here’s where I draw the line.”

You laughed in disbelief. But then an idea made your smile slide into flirtation. You set your dessert aside and rolled your chair closer to his. Dean watched you as your hand slid up his arm, and your pretty eyes met his.

“Okay, what if I make it worth your while?” you posed.

He tilted his head. His hand found the curve of your waist and slid around, bringing you even closer.

“Oh, yeah?” he challenged. “If you really want my pie, that’s gotta be damn worth it.”

Another giggle bubbled in your throat, but you continued to play your part.

“I have a few ideas,” you said. Your fingers drew a path down his chest, over the soft gray Henley he wore. You could feel the warmth of his skin underneath, and the firmness of his body. His grip on your waist tightened a fraction.   

And he smirked. “Tell me…”

Your lips were a whisper from his. He smelled like spicy cologne and blueberries. Two of his fingers came to brush your hair away from your cheek…

But as usual, your boss had the absolute worst timing. The sound of your office door opening was like a gunshot ringing through the room, making you and Dean separate from one another with a jolt.

Nick Savage strode in without knocking, as he was wont to do. (No matter how many times you asked him not to.)

“Hey, what’s your progress on the Greenway account…oh,” said Nick, pausing where he stood.

He took note of Dean in the room and straightened his posture. His expression changed from its lazy gait, to a more tightened one. You swore you could spot a tinge of annoyance as well, like he was surprised that he hadn’t caught you alone in your office.

“I see I’m interrupting,” he said.

Holding in a sigh, you looked over at Dean and found him similarly assessing Nick.

“This is Dean. You might remember him from last week, when the elevator broke down. He’s one of the firefighters who got me out,” you said. Your hand fell on your companion’s arm. “Dean, this is—”

“Her boss,” Nick said. He seemed to lighten up and give Dean a smile, reaching over to shake the man’s hand. Dean obliged him.

“So I’ve heard,” he said. His tone was pleasant enough, but still more reserved.

Nick purposefully shifted his attention back to you.

“Report? Greenway account?” he repeated.

Your lips firmed into a line, though you slipped back into the professional patience you had to maintain at all times with this man.

“I’m still on my break, but I’ll have the report to you by end-of-day,” you said.

Nick tsked at you with a shrug. “How’re you gonna get that account locked down if you’re not trying to conference with Mr. Greenway? He’s headed to China in two hours.”

You had to reign in an annoyed tick in your brow. But you didn’t notice how Dean was watching the exchange between you and your boss with a thinly veiled frown.

“I’ve called three times, Nick. He’ll get back to me.”

“Hmm. I wonder if Josh is taking that same approach,” Nick wondered with mocking sincerity. “I’ll go ask him.”

He finally turned to leave, though he stopped short, giving Dean a lazy salute. “Nice to meet you…”

“Dean,” he reminded. 

“Right.” Nick slid a pointed finger your way. “Greenway. 2:00 p.m.”

You were silently simmering by the time your office door closed behind him. 

“Well, he’s a delight,” Dean remarked.  

“He’s a dick,” you huffed and tossed your napkin down. But you grabbed your desk phone to make a quick call—to Mr. Greenway.

Dean frowned, but he covered it up by wiping his mouth with a napkin, subtly clearing his throat.

“I should head out then, let you get back to work,” he said. 

His words made you pause. You had a reply ready on your tongue, that his suggestion was probably for the best.

But then you actually looked into his eyes. Guilt prickled in your chest as you realized what you were doing. Not only were you letting Nick get under your skin again, but here was a man who’d brought you lunch. Who was willing to sit in an uncomfortable chair to spend some time with you, and you were about to brush him off.

You hung up the phone without dialing. 

“No. I’m sorry. Stay, please,” you told him, and grabbed his arm to keep him in his seat. You pushed your desk phone away with your spare hand and gave Dean your full attention, along with a smile.

“Where were we?” you asked.

Finally, Dean’s reserved expression eased as he relaxed in his chair, and subtly leaned towards you. He thumbed at your cheek with a smirk.

“I don’t know, something about making it worth my while.”

You bit your lip on a deeper smile.

“Oh, yeah,” you nodded. You crossed the ever-closing distance to give Dean a proper kiss. Your hand found his cheek, and your thumb brushed back and forth across the stubble there. You tasted sweet, sweet pie on his lips. 

Even after you parted softly, Dean went back in for a second taste of you. This time it was deeper, as he angled into the kiss. He once again brought you close, just shy of dragging you into his lap.

His hand reached behind your head and succeeded in taking the clip out of your hair. He tossed it on your desk and sunk his hand into the soft strands while his lips continued to devour yours.

It was a small move, but you found it both soothing and exhilarating. You shuddered when you felt his fingers brush the back of your neck. It had you contemplating locking the door of your office and forgoing the rest of lunch…but your mind was competing with your heart, warning you to be cautious. To protect yourself. 

Really, you’d just met Dean. You had no idea what to expect here, even though your heart was tripping up over his slightest touch.

Still, your face was warm when you eventually parted from him. You chanced meeting his eyes, and you blushed further at what you saw.

The truth was, Dean had been contemplating laying you out flat across your desk. But he tried his best to keep it down to a simmer behind his eyes, a bright and gleaming green.

“Worth it?” you asked. Your voice was a mere whisper, despite your smile.

He returned it, and gave you one last kiss.

“So worth it,” he said. 

Dean wasn’t sure he liked this.

The start of his shift was usually the time for him to be relaxed, but focused. He knew who he was and what he needed to do when he entered the firehouse. It was his second home, perhaps even the place where he felt most comfortable.

And yet, he nearly burnt his hand while pouring himself a cup of coffee.

“Shit,” he muttered. He jolted and hopped back a step as scalding brown liquid splashed between his feet. It had Benny and Meg looking over from the common room, where they sat at the dining table.

Dean looked at the mess he created and tried not to sigh. He wasn’t awake enough for this…or maybe, he didn’t want to admit that he’d been thinking about you.

Your smile, your eyes, your voice, your occasional shyness, versus the way you dealt with your boss like a pro. Your confidence that was damn sexy, and had Dean imagining what you’d be like taking his orders, or giving them right back, shoving him down into a seat, straddling his thighs, his hands hiking up your skirt…

Dean shook his head a bit sharply to try and clear it.

He circled into the kitchen in need of a paper towel. But he bumped right into Jack, who was making breakfast. It sent the salt canister flying out of his hand and dumping into the pan of eggs.

“Oh, fuck. Sorry,” Dean said. He really did sigh this time. Now they’d have to wait even longer for breakfast.

“Uh, it’s okay. I can save it,” Jack said, though his brows were furrowed as he contemplated just how he was going to do that. He took a wooden spoon and tried to scoop out the mound of salt on the still-sizzling eggs.

Meanwhile, Dean’s lips pursed as he went over to grab a few paper towels. Once the mess by the coffeemaker was clean, he poured himself a tall cup and took a seat between his friends. Benny shot him a glance as he sipped at his own mug.

“You all right, brother?” Benny asked.

“Just fine,” Dean replied. He tried to sound breezy, but neither Benny or Meg bought it. She eyed him with a smirk.

“Heard you went on a date the other night,” she said. “A real one, with chocolates and flowers and all that shit.”

Dean shot her a sharper frown. “Who the hell told…oh. Perfect. Goddamn it, Cas.”

He should’ve known that big-mouth bastard couldn’t be trusted.

“Nope,” Meg said. Her eyes were dancing mischievously, and Dean knew he was in for it this morning. “Your little girlfriend is best friends with my cousin.”

She tossed a sly look at Benny. “You remember Andréa. You two were sucking face hardcore the other night. And giving quite a show to the local pedestrians. Have you called her yet, by the way?”

Benny cleared his throat, but he looked both unrepentant and tight-lipped about his business as he stayed sipping his coffee. Dean shot him a smirk. Until Meg directed her cutting gaze back to him.

“And you,” she said, just as slyly. “Dating your own damsel in distress. How fucking predictable.”

Dean’s lips firmed into a line, while Benny’s brows shot up.

“You really went for it with Elevator Girl?” he remarked in surprise. “I saw you two talkin’, but didn’t think you’d pulled the trigger.”

Dean rolled his eyes. “All right, first of all, let’s stop calling her ‘Elevator Girl.’ She’s got a name.”

Once he’d told them your name, however, their smiles deepened. And Dean knew it was about to be a long shift.

“Ooh, he’s got it bad, bad,” Benny shook his head.

Meg made a “cute” face at him and reached out to shake Dean’s chin, smirking when he slapped her hand away.

“Look at him, all twitterpated,” she teased.

“I’m fine,” Dean all but gritted out. 

Benny chuckled, but truthfully, he was happy for his friend. It seemed the time had finally come when Dean Winchester was hooked on a nice girl. Hopefully one he intended to keep seeing.

“If it’s that serious, you should bring her by the Roadhouse again,” Benny said.

Dean snorted into his coffee. “Yeah, like I’d want to subject her to you degenerate clowns.”

“Well, if you expect to keep it going with this girl, she’s gotta meet us eventually,” Meg pointed out. Dean shot her a look.

“Oh, she’s definitely not meetin’ you,” he said.

Meg’s brows knit together. “What? I’m perfectly pleasant.”

Before Dean could utter a retort, a familiar alarm bell tolled on the intercom speakers. There was a working house fire over in Bellmont—the wealthier part of town. Truck 79 and Rescue Squad 5 were called, along with Ambulance 7.

All hands on deck.

“Okay, Jack. You’re staying on my ass once we get in there. You got it?” Dean told the Candidate.

“Yes, Lieutenant,” Jack agreed. It was only his second real fire since he joined Firehouse 25.

By now the team was in full gear, with jackets and helmets and belts. The Chief, Bobby Singer, was at the helm. He and Dean shared a nod.

“All right, Dean. Head in. Lafitte and Ramirez will vent the roof,” he said. 

Dean nodded again. “You got it, Chief.”

While two of his team got the firehose ready, Dean fitted his mask over his face. Already the fire was at a full blaze. They had a limited time before the fire grew too wild to safely maneuver. They’d know when the flames started smoking black. The Chief would let them know on their walkie talkies, and Dean would have to pull his team out.

But first, there was a family of four trapped inside the large two-story house. He fully intended to get every single one of them out.

Thanks to the mask, he could hear his own deep breaths in his ears as he entered the house. A quick look back confirmed that Jack was on his heels, and Gordon was right behind him.

“Okay, clear each room. I’m going right, through the kitchen,” Dean called out the order.

“I’ll take left through the living room,” Gordon replied.

Dean shot a thumbs up. “Copy that.”

Then they got to work.

The flames were high and eating up the walls of what would’ve been a pristine open kitchen. The room was clear, so Jack and Dean kept moving forward until they reached a long hall. They had to hasten single file until Dean opened up the first bedroom with his crowbar.

“Fire Department, call out!” he shouted.

He didn’t hear anything, but that didn’t mean the room was clear. It was a child’s room, a girl if he had to guess. There were stuffed animals strewn across an unmade bed with pink bedsheets. He checked the closet while Jack looked under the bed. Neither man found anything.

“All right, moving on. First bedroom clear,” Dean said into his walkie talkie. “Going upstairs next.”

“Master bedroom clear,” Gordon commed in.

Jack and Dean continued to the second floor, where the flames were thickest. It was getting harder to see, and even harder to breathe, despite the mask.

“We’re almost outta time, fellas,” Bobby radioed.  

“Just a couple more rooms, Chief,” Dean responded. The first and second bathroom was clear, as was a linen closet in the hall. He had a feeling about this last room though.

He opened the door and nearly got a flaming piece of wall dropped on his head. He jumped back at the same time Jack helped pull him to safety.

Dean breathed deeply. He didn’t have time for thanks, but he reached back and pat Jack on the arm before he entered the bedroom. It was another child’s room, this time for a boy—with green walls, and a school uniform on the back of a chair.

“Fire Department!” he said, though it nearly died on his tongue at what he saw.

There in the far corner, on the other side of the twin bed, was a man kneeling on the floor. He was doing his best to cover his wife and kids. His back was charred beyond recognition.

Dean snapped to attention when he heard one of the kids whimper.

“Fire Department,” he repeated, as he rushed to them. He and Jack peeled the man off his family as carefully as he could. Dean hauled him onto his shoulder.

Meanwhile, the man’s wife was crying and holding her children as tight as possible: a boy that looked about 10 years old, and a young girl. The mother’s glassy eyes widened with hope when she saw Jack and Dean.

“We’re gonna get you out. Come on,” Dean reassured. His hand on her shoulder was both supportive and urging her up onto her feet. Jack helped get her kids up as well.

Gordon joined them as soon as they were out of the room. He picked up the boy while Jack carried the little girl, and Dean had an arm wrapped around the mother while he still carried the father on his shoulder. 

They made it out of the house just before the ceiling started to cave in at the doorway.

Meg and Chuck were waiting for them with a gurney, where Dean carefully laid down the man he carried. His wife hovered close with her kids as Meg began calling out instructions to her partner, trying to take the man’s vitals, all while they wheeled him towards the ambulance.

Just before they would’ve brought him up into the ambo, Meg halted them with a hand. Her other gloved hand was poised at the man’s wrist. She listened closely for a few more seconds in concentration…

And she sighed through her nose. She removed her stethoscope and met the wife’s eyes.

“I’m sorry. He’s gone.”

Dean’s heart fell into his stomach, but he held the woman as she fell apart. Jack and Gordon did the same for the kids. Behind them, the rest of the team were dousing the flames and black smoke consuming the house with the firehose. Chief Singer let out a heavy breath, but he continued issuing orders as needed.

Dean stared at the pale, soot-stained face of the man he’d failed to save. The woman’s cries rang in his ears, and he continued to support her as she fell to her knees and gathered her children close.

He understood their pain.

Not for the first time, he wondered what his father must’ve felt…the day his mother died.

Dean was a seasoned firefighter. He’d seen enough of the horrors this world could produce, and he had an internal catalogue of shit he’d rather forget. But he knew, as he later got back onto the truck for the long ride back to the firehouse.

He knew this day would be another one to be imprinted on his memory.

“You’re quiet,” Sam noted. He ate dinner in relative silence with his brother, in the apartment they shared. Dean met Sam’s eyes.

“Long day,” Dean eventually said.

Sam didn’t like the sound of that. Before he could probe further, Dean’s phone vibrated on the small dining table.

Dean slowly reached for his phone and saw the new text message, from you.

Hey, thanks again for lunch yesterday. Hope I get to see you again soon. ❤️

It briefly lightened him, almost bringing a smile to his face.

It soon fell, even though his thumb hovered over the keyboard to reply. His mind was blank. Right now, he couldn’t think of a damn thing flirtatious, or charming, or even human enough to say to you.

“Dean,” Sam said, earning his attention. “What’s wrong?”

Again, Dean hesitated. He blew out a slow, heavy breath and sat back in his seat. He ran his fingers roughly through his hair as he thought and thought.

But if anyone might’ve understood where his head was at, it was his brother.

“What do you think would’ve happened if Mom had made it out of the fire, instead of Dad?” Dean asked.

To say that question shocked Sam would be an understatement. Yet to his credit, Sam internalized most of his reaction. He tilted his head as his brows furrowed.

“I don’t know,” he replied honestly. Dean’s question was impossible for his mind to even wrap around; mostly because he never got the chance to meet his mother. The house fire claimed their home when Sam was barely six months old.

All he knew was his father, and Dean.

Dean shook his head and wiped a hand over his mouth, an anxious gesture Sam knew well. 

“She would’ve been just as messed up at Dad, but…I don’t know. Ignore me. I don’t know what the fuck I’m saying.”

“What made you think about that?” Sam asked.

“Today,” Dean said. Though he paused, he managed to say it. “It was a house fire. A mom and two little kids, boy and girl. Their dad just laid over ‘em, took the brunt of it.”

“Jesus…he didn’t make it, did he?” Sam deduced, from Dean’s eyes and his tone. Dean shook his head slow. 

“I’ve seen a lot of shit, Sammy, but…”

This was why Sam worried about his brother. He admired the hell out of him, but he also worried. 

Sam had a ring in his nightstand. He’d picked it out last month. Part of him was hesitating to move forward, not because he thought his girlfriend of three years would say no to marrying him, but because he didn’t want his brother to be alone.

“You don’t have to look at me like that. I’m okay,” Dean said, levying him with a knowing look. His lips gave a wry turn. “Nothing a couple shots of Jameson won’t cure.”

Sam snorted. “Yeah, that’s what you need.”

“Right. Like I haven’t caught you up late with your mistress, Johnny Walker,” Dean tossed back.

Sam’s lips pursed, but the point was made. He spent his days putting murderers, drug dealers, rapists, and thieves on trial. Some days were darker and more unreal in their realism than others. And he could only burden Eileen so much.

Still, he didn’t like the look of Dean, who got up from the table and took his half-full plate of spaghetti to the sink.

Dean went up to his room and showered. He’d done so at the station, but showering was one of those methodical things he could do to try to ease his mind, besides working on his car. It provided an alternative to drinking. 

But it didn’t work this time, as he knew it wouldn’t. He lied in bed after getting dressed, just staring up at the ceiling. 

He checked his phone and saw your text, still waiting on an answer. He hesitated…but his thumb hovered over your name. He called you instead.  

“Hey,” your soft voice greeted him. You sounded surprised to get his call, but also a little sleepy, like you were on the verge of going down for the night.

“Hey, yourself,” Dean said. “Sorry, were you about to get to sleep?”

“No, I’m awake. What’re you up to?”

“I’m home. Been a long day,” he admitted. 

“Yeah?” you asked. “Dean, are you okay?”

He heard the perceptive shift in your tone. Against his best efforts, he should’ve known you would pick up on the threads of his mood. But he smiled at the sincerity in your voice. True concern. 

“Yeah. I’m good, sweetheart. How’re you?”

“Uh-uh. Not so fast,” you replied. “…Did something happen at work today?”

He sighed. “Yeah, but uh…we don’t need to get into it. It’s okay.”

“You sure?” you asked. “I’m a good listener.”

“That you are,” he said, with a deeper smile. “You know what’ll help me?”

“What’s that?”

“Tell me, how bad did you wanna knuckle-dunk your boss’s teeth in today?” 

“Oh my God. On a scale of 1 to 10?”

“Lay it on me.”

“20,” you replied. “You met him, so now I can tell you without exaggeration. He’s the Chief Asshat among asshats.”

Dean chuckled. It crinkled the corners of his eyes.

“What’d he do this time?”

You explained your latest frustrations. Then you continued to make him laugh with all the creative ways you’d imagined ending your boss for his dickish behavior, demanding reports, pitting you against your coworkers, being a general pain in the ass. 

The rusty can opener in the break lounge was Dean’s personal favorite. 

Hearing about your day, and the colorful adjectives you used, managed to lighten him. For a little while, it even took his mind off his troubles. And you admitted that venting to him about your violent fantasies was its own form of therapy. 

“Damn, do I gotta worry about you?” Dean teased. 

“Only if you get on my bad side, Lieutenant,” you said. Your voice was nearly a purr.

It had him smirking, with a tendril of heat lacing down the back of his neck. 

“All right, then. I promise I won’t make it a habit,” he said. “Gotta keep you nice and sweet for me.” 

You laughed then, in a way that had him imagining your pretty blush. 

He ended up talking with you about everything and nothing, well into the night.

AN: 🥹 *sighs* Anywho, I know this chapter was a little shorter than usual, but I hope you got a kick out of Dean's first meeting with Nick. And we got a snapshot of an unfortunate "bad day" at the firehouse.

In Part 6, we'll get deeper into the murder mystery, along with a taste of jealousy...

Next Time:

“Uh, no, that’s okay,” you said. “I’m waiting for someone.”

“What?” Gordon asked.

It was getting busy in the bar, making it loud enough that you could understand why he hadn’t heard you. You leaned over towards his ear.

“I’m good for now, thanks,” you said, raising your voice a bit. Gordon leaned in even closer and chanced resting a hand above your knee.

“You sure?” he asked. He gave you a smile that was all smooth sex appeal and confidence, without being arrogant. It was undoubtedly attractive, but you were more shocked than charmed in your blush.

You instinctively leaned back when you felt his hand on your thigh.

Dean Winchester Masterlist

Main Masterlist

Series Tag List (Part 1):

@hobby27 @kazsrm67 @letheatheodore @agothwithheavysetmakeup @jacklesbrainworms @foxyjwls007 @wincastifer @iamsapphine @simpforbuckyb

@vanillawhiskeyflavoredkisses @roseblue373 @this-is-me19 @emily-winchester @spnexploration @deans-spinster-witch @deans-baby-momma @iprobablyshipit91

@melancholictearz @nic-kolas @katherineann814 @sleepyqueerenergy @wayward-lost-and-never-found @thewritersaddictions @just-levyy @samanddeaninatrenchcoat @deanwanddamons @antisocialcorrupt @lacilou @adoringanakin @theonlymaninthesky @teehxk @midnightmadwoman @brianochka @branj19

@agalliasi @venicesem @chriszgirl92 @lyarr24 @ladysparkles78 @solariklees @xsophianicolex @deansbbyx @candy-coated-misery0731 @curlycarley @sarahgracej @bagpussjocken @ultrahviolentart @chernayawidow @beskarfilms @mimaria420

[mismaeve]

Her Tortured Soul, Part One

↳ Her Tortured Soul, Thranduil x Reader, Elrond x Reader ( I guess) Warnings: kinda angsty, implies cheating Word Count: 1.3k A/N: It's been months since I've written anything. Today, out of the blue, I wanted to write. So I did. I got so excited about it, that I'm now posting without much editing and proofreading. I just want to publish it because I'm proud of having written something. Even if it is short and angsty. Even if it implies morally questionable themes. Even if I have projected myself into the story. I don't care. I wrote today and I am proud, even if I am nervous now to share. Enjoy! Imagine having chosen Elrond when you should have chosen Thranduil.

The soft beating of his heart threatened to lull you to sleep, the rhythmic heaving and falling of his chest concurrent with his warm palm that slowly moved up and down your back where light fingers brushed against the soft fabric of your robes.

“It is nearly time,” his whispered words made you wince. How could a voice so divine and pure be capable of sending such daggers of ice to pierce your already aching heart.

“I don’t want to,” your protest was made in vain; you knew better than to hope and dream that your comings and goings could ever be steered and controlled by the sheer will of your soul.

“Yet you must,” Thranduil’s voice lacked the grief and sorrow you had expected to hear at the near hour of your inevitable departure. It was better that way.

“There is nothing for me there,” you clung to his robes with all the frail and desperate might your trembling fingers could muster.

“There is nothing for you here either, not yet in any case,” he murmured into your hair.

He was right. How was it that he was always right?

“Only because you have made it so,” you objected nonetheless, foolishly daring to hope that this time, finally, he would change his mind.

He wouldn’t.

“I’m afraid it was your selfless heart that was the grand architect of your current predicament, my love,” Thranduil reminded you quietly before you felt him move, the feeling of his soft lips on your throbbing temple bringing you agonizing relief.

Selfless. It used to mean something to you. Now it made you laugh in bittersweet regret.

“Is there ever going to be a way?”

His lack of response was the dreaded answer to your silly question. You had known it long ago; you had feared as much when you had accepted his proposal and promised to love him and honor him.

Where was your honor now while cuddled in another’s arms, desire eating away at your once selfless being, slowly tainting it darker and making it easier to lust after that which was forbidden. You had allowed your heart to run wild and reckless for too long, now it was near impossible to cage it again and expect reason and loyalty.

“And what of your heart, my lord?” another meaningless question escaped your lips when you knew its answer and how unfair it was of you to remind him of his regret and shame.

“You should know by now where my heart lies,” Thranduil gave his reply, yet it wasn’t enough to justify your selfish habit.

“I need to hear you say it,” you pressed on. For what purpose, only the wise and the poetic could say.

“My heart has always been yours to do with as you pleased,” he whispered after a while, his voice taking on a much graver note.

His heart hadn’t been lightly given, yet you had accepted it with open arms and promises of love, only to trample over it on your way to righteousness with wanting to do what was right and noble.

How wrong you had been, the horror of it would never cease to torment you, regardless of how this impossible situation would eventually be solved.

There would be pain. Only question that remained was who the wretched soul would be, left outside alone and cold, open to be devoured by loneliness and anguish. You could go about it however you wished, despite of your endless seeking, there was no nobility in the choice that was laid before you. Only pain.

“He probably all but suspects already,” you suggested.

You felt Thranduil shake his head slowly.

“He loves you too much to ever be able to entertain such a notion. His love for you has always blinded him to reason. Else he never would have married you; he would have seen you weren’t his to wed. Or love.”

True as they were, his words pained you nonetheless.

You moved your tired and slowly fading body to face the elf you loved above all else. Above yourself, above your husband, above life and death, above honor and duty, and loyalty. Your hands went to cradle his mournful face in your soft palms, while your lips found his in yet another longing kiss that somehow ended up bringing more torment than comfort.

Quick to respond to your affections, his arms moved to embrace you, his hands clawing at your back, desperate to pull you closer, to feel more of you and claim that which he had longed for in his hours of miserable solitude. Even his kiss grew deeper and hungrier, more demanding as it threatened to finally take what he had considered his and been robbed of in the cruelest of all manners.

Unable to resist that which had always felt so right, you leaned your head against his shoulder and submitted your being to his fiery kisses, travelling now down the length of your neck where they left a path of unchecked want and need in their wake.

A quiet and quivering moan slipped past your lips as he continued to suck and nibble on the sensitive skin of your neck, allowing you to slip further away from your responsibilities and restrictions, giving yourself over to the same desires that had ruled your heart and flesh for decades before you had chosen to give in and abandon your virtues.

Only he wouldn’t go any further. Just as his kisses had ignited the fire in your loins, his words managed to extinguish it with a single uttered sentence.

“You need to be going,” his words were more of a breathless plea than order, yet all the same you knew you had to comply.

“I cannot bring myself to leave you,” you whispered as the cold sense of your cruel reality once again had made itself known.

“You must,” Thranduil reminded you as he moved to lift you off his lap where you had been cuddled underneath his velvet robes, away from the life you had so mistakenly chosen for yourself.

“Will I see you tomorrow?” your question was filled with hope, more so with devastating need.

His eyes never left you while you smoothed out your silken robes, a habit you had developed in hopes of tidying up the utter mess your heart had made, a gesture that was completely useless. Your husband wouldn’t have known even if you had gone back in all your nakedness and bearing the marks of your treacherous soul.

“Thranduil?”

His lips quivered but no words were uttered. Uncertainty gripped your heart at the lack of response, of that promise you needed to hear, night after night when both your hearts would break upon your departure.

“I cannot leave without knowing you’ll be here,” you begged him, your voice sounding every bit of the shameless fear that you carried deep within you.

A weak smile appeared on his lips at last and he gave a short nod, but no promise. Not tonight. You would have to content yourself with hope.

Before you could press him for more, to demand that promise that you knew you had no right to ask for, he was gone and there was darkness before you opened your eyes to the early morning sun and the sound of chirping birds.

Once again, like every other morning before, you fought with all that you had to keep your tears at bay and keep your breathing even. You would not bring further shame unto your husband by submitting him to your selfish tears. He would proceed to comfort you, to soothe the ache within your soul and bring you peaceful relief when you deserved none. So, you kept quiet and still as best you could while your heart broke and your insides burned and froze at the same time, while shame brought down its wrath and forced you to despise yourself.

“Good morning, my love,” his loving voice greeted you before his lips found your cheek.

A well-rehearsed smile bloomed upon your features while your eyes remained closed, lest they gave away your longing and pain.

A settling breath, a count to three and a promise to right your wrongs, and you opened your eyes to gaze upon your beloved husband Elrond.

The countdown to midnight was reset and started anew.

↳ Part Two

Gif by @wtfhasmy-lifecometo

No pressure tag bc I've been gone for so long: @kanafinwe-makalaure @heilith @i-did-not-mean-to @aduialel @coopsgirl @missymoo02 @otakumultimuse-hiddlewhore @augustwithquills @a-contemplation-upon-flowers @eunoiaastralwings @blueberryrock @mxmia @sehnsuchts-trunken

[theflyingfeeling]

thank you so much @ao3userxnowimnothing for the tag 🖤

rules: list your top 5 favorites of your fics, what they're about, and why you're proud of them, then tag some fic authors to do the same!

I'm tagging @percervall @neverrepent @milirii and @rosalba-robi 🌻

(see my choices under the read-more)

1. Room for one more troubled soul

I’m terribly proud of this fic, mostly because its length and immensity. I worked for it for months and had my ups and downs (e.g. it took me aaaaaages to finish the first friggin’ chapter?!), and while I did have an outline for the full story, there were also lots of plot lines that I improvised as the story developed and ended up working out quite by accident if I’m completely honest 😂 I had previously sort of abandoned a gigantic multi-chapter fic in the ski jumping fandom so I wasn’t sure if I could pull off a work that was this extensive, which is why I’m super proud of myself for having succeeded with this one, because I’m not the most patient of people. Now that I know I can actually finish a longer multi-chapter work, I have faith in myself to do so again 😇

2. But There’s Nothing To Be Afraid Of

Despite the horrifying styling of the title, I’m still proud of my first ever BC fic that I published a year ago (in which the guys go see Måneskin at a festival, in a nutshell). I was soooooo nervous about posting it that I decided to post the first two chapters at one go because nothing much happens in the first chapter and I was desperate to show the readers that hey! hey! this is actually more than Joel being sulky! just wait!! 😅 I don’t ship Joel/Damiano anymore, but this fic still holds a special place in my heart

3. The YouTuber AU, particularly Of rock, roll and dogs

I know I’ve said this at many occasions but I’ll say it again: I loooooove writing from Joel’s point of view, because he’s equal amounts of emo and dramatic, and it’s fun to play with that combo. I’m not afraid to boast my own trumpet here and say that this AU and especially the Joel POVs are funny af, and building the whole alternate universe was so much fun too!

4. You are the sun and I am just the planets

idk man, I’m just really fond of the College/University AU and I’m a sucker for pining, and as heartbreaking as it is, I also enjoy unrequited love as a trope. The mood of the fic changes gradually the more time Olli spends with Joonas, and I kinda like that effect; at this point his whole life wasn’t as consumed by his crush for Joonas (at least not to the extent it is in the main work in this AU), but you can clearly see he’s in too deep already… Plus I love the FOB song in the title/summary 💖

5. A nameless Olli/Aleksi prompt ficlet for my Valentine’s Day Fluff series (also on AO3)

Loosely based on the movie Just Like Heaven, which I've never seen myself but after reading the synopsis I made my own adaption of it in which Olli adopts Rilla when she was put in the shelter because Aleksi is lying in a coma in the hospital. I’m strangely proud of this one because I think it’s a really touching story and I did cry a little when writing it (NOT as in “omg I’m such a great writer” but as in “OMG DOGS!! 😭”) and I must say that I was a tiiiiiiiiiny bit disappointed it didn’t get as many notes as some of the other fics in this series that in my opinion weren’t as good. Yes, the ending is ridiculous and a little unrealistic but hey, it’s magic realism! Aleksi is a half-ghost for most of if, for goodness sake!! So please, if you haven’t read it yet, grab some tissues and do so, because I’m really proud of this one and I’m also very keen on making y’all cry (ohhh just WAIT ‘til you get to read the Gran Hotel AU!)

[juminsmysticmc]

I'm so sorry that you are sad. Honestly I was suprised that request are open for so long... So I will request! Can I have RFA + minor trio (i'm so happy that i don't have to choose one part this time, i love almost everyone) who was forced by her family to have job like lawyer or doctor but she dreamed about being a writer since she was very young? Thank you and don't be sad about lack of requests. I'm sure thatbin short time you will again have tons of them

RFA + Minor Trio with a Mc who was forced to do high sociality jobs instead of becoming an author

Thank you, yeah, they were open for a pretty long time, the likes and reblogs also went down a bit, I believe that I was gone for too long, ups.

But I will catch up!

Your words made me happy! Thank you for your support!

Jumin

,,I look up to you, my love,’’ Jumin praised you in your shared bedroom as you faced each other.

Your head was resting on his warm chest as you could hear his heartbeat.

,,Why?’’ you asked him, curious about what he would say next.

,,You achieved so much. You studied medicine and are a professor at such a young age, saving other people’s lives, it’s really amazing, you know?’’ he asked you, smiling down at you as you stayed silent for a few moments.

,,You think so? Because I always wanted to become an author. I can’t think of a time in my childhood in which I wasn’t thinking about a story. I only began to write them down way too late. I didn’t even get the chance to ask a publisher to look at them,’’ you whispered sadly, and Jumin could hear it.

,,Why didn’t you do that then?’’ he asked you, now patting your back.

,,I was forced to. My mother, gosh, it was such a hard time. That’s why I don’t have a good relationship with her.

She burned all my writings, forced me to go to the school she wanted, all because she wanted me to have a good stable job; a job with money, contacts to marry into a rich family, to marry another doctor, and open my own hospital.

Because she came from a medical family, I had to do the same.’’ you sighed.

,,Then… just resign, I will call a publisher tomorrow. You don’t need to worry about money. I already told you once… just put yourself above everyone else… if you want to become a writer, I will open that possibility for you… I will protect you, even in front of your mother,’’ Jumin whispered and held you tighter in his arms while you began to fall asleep with your heart at ease...

Zen ( this one was kinda hard cause, like everyone else knows, I always try to stick to the original story line and MC is his manager after they become a couple so…)

,,I’m so proud of you,’’ Zen laughed as he kissed you.

You just resigned your position as a lawyer, all because you were going for your own carrier.

,,Thank you, Zenny,’’ you mumbled and gave him a kiss on his cheek.

,,You motivated me to not do what my family wants. Thanks to you, I’ve realized that even if that was a stable job, nothing can beat doing something you love,’’ you laughed.

Zen knew that you were very brave and that it took you a lot of strength.

But luckily, you saved a lot of money in your years as a lawyer so every single door was open to you.

,,ARE YOU CRAZY?!’’ someone screamed when you just returned in front of Zen’s door.

,,YOU BARELY KNOW THIS MAN! WHAT CAN HE GIVE YOU?! NOTHING! HE WILL TAKE ALL YOUR MONEY!’’ your mother screamed at you.

,,Mother, I have enough of my own. So does Zen and we already talked about this. Besides, no one is saying that I won’t keep making money anymore,’’ you told her calmly, making your boyfriend even prouder.

,,Ah! And what do you intend to do? So you think that you will write something and someone else will make a book out of your crap?’’ she asked you, laughing at your idiotic idea, or so she thought.

,,No,’’ you laughed.

,,I will work as his manager and while I am doing so, I will write my own book, my steps, and a script for a movie. Everything is already set, mother,’’ you smiled and pulled Zen.

,,One day, we will be able to talk like a mother and a daughter, but until then, stay healthy,’’ you lastly said and then closed the door behind yourself.

Yoosung

As you helped Yoosung, he realized more and more that you taught him with a bit of bitterness.

Of course, humans and animals were different, but you noticed that there were a few basics you could help him to remember.

One day, Yoosung finally found enough strength to ask you about it.

,,Mc, do you like your job?’’ he asked you, a bit nervous even though you two had been together for such a long time.

You answered with a short, ,,no’’ and then you smiled.

,,I hate it. I wanted to become a writer. I put all my hope into it and lost. My parents were pretty strict and they still are. I had to become a doctor and I couldn’t change that. And so, here I am, with the most wonderful job, saving human beings, without actually enjoying it,’’ you told him and laid back on your chair.

,,And why do you keep doing it?’’ he asked you.

Well, that was a good question. You really had no idea...why…?

,,Let’s do it like this! Work on your books, on whatever you want to write. Write whenever you have time and once I have the job, you can resign yours! I will make your dream come true. You just have to go through it for a little while longer,’’ he smiled at you, actually making you tear up.

,,Yoosung, I’m so happy that I met you back then,’’ you laughed in tears and kissed him with all your love.

Jaehee

Back then, when Jaehee gave you the key, she never thought that this could be a harder fight than she imagined.

As a banker, one of the most known in Korea, you however, knew what you were talking about.

But something felt off.

And Jaehee, even though she didn’t like it, began to understand while you supported her so much with doing what she loved.

You were probably going through the same.

,,We need these credits and you need to fill out that page and sign here, these papers,’’ you told her, with the most monotone voice you ever had.

,,You don’t look as if you enjoy this. I’m sorry that you have to do this for us���’’ she mumbled.

In the next moment, you smiled at her. ,,Don’t worry, Jaehee. this just isn’t my favorite job, that’s why. I just don’t like my job, it has nothing to do with you,’’

This made her feel even more uncomfortable.

,,Mc, why don’t you do the same as me… I mean, I thought that we would do this together, but seeing you so busy… is that really something you want to do?’’ she asked you, more nervous than before.

Currently, Jaehee was questioning all her decisions.

Was it the right decision to leave Jumin’s company and open a shop with a stranger she kind of felt attracted to?

,,I’ll find a solution,’’ you smiled and stroked her arm.

,,I have to wait until we are finished with the preparations or else our money will be cut off and we won’t be able to do anything. Then, when this coffee shop is up and running, I will write a book about how to make it work, give out information without wanting money for it, and just helping people,’’ you smiled, your eyes looked even warmer now.

,,You- oh my, my head, what was I thinking? Of course, what you’re saying makes so much sense,’’ she laughed.

,,Let’s do this. I will support you with all my heart,’’ she smiled and signed the paper you needed from her.

Saeyoung

,,I’m home,’’ you called as you rushed inside and took off your shoes.

Saeyoung rushed to your side as he helped you to take off your jacket.

,,How was your day, my dear?’’ he said.

You were shocked to see your fiancé in a dress with fake hair.

,,What the heck are you doing?’’ you laughed as you kissed him.

,,Since you weren’t home, I had to play the madam of the house,’’ he acted.

,,In short, he had to act like an idiot,’’ Saeran said and rolled his eyes as your friends, the other members of the RFA laughed.

Yes, carefree days finally came.

,,How was work?’’ Zen asked you.

,,Please, no, don’t let me begin! I hate it! Being a judge for teenagers is just so… Ah, I can’t take it anymore! I’m pissed and I don’t want to do it anymore,’’ you said and drank some water.

,,Why?’’ Jaehee asked you. You were doing a good job, why did you think like that?

,,Because I don’t want to take children from their parents anymore. I’m sick and tired of it,’’ you answered.

,,If they get neglected…’’ Saeyoung answered, this time being serious. He knew what he was talking about.

You looked at him. You understood his point, but…

,,It’s not fair to judge by things you hear or experience yourself. Sometimes, there are good parents who lose their children, you know?’’ you warned him.

But you already knew that Saeyoung put an end to all of this, even though you didn’t like the way he did it, just like he did it for Zen back then when he posted a short chapter of your book and made a lot of publishers come to you.

As a little thank you, he said back then.

And even though you didn’t like the method he used, you were thankful to him and were happy.

If someone wants to see a oneshot out of this HC please comment below or send me a message ( anon works out too ) I want to hear your opinions.

Saeran

You laid down on your couch when you turned your head around to read the time.

Once again, it was 3 am.

Saeran walked over to you without you noticing him and hugged you from behind.

,,You’re still not sleeping?’’ you asked him and nuzzled your face into his neck, inhaling Saeran’s scent.

,,Jumin needed help with something and I had to finish it,’’ he lied. He waited for you but he would never tell you. The thing he worked on wasn’t even that important.

He just wanted to see you, because as a politician, you two barely had time for each other.

It was funny. He hated politicians, his ,,father’’ at first, but you… you were different.

You were fighting for something.

And he knew that if it wasn’t for him, you would have given up this job a long time ago.

,,You know, if you want to do something else, do it… you don’t have to stay in that position just for me,’’ he mumbled as he stroked your hair.

,,It’s okay. We need to save Saeyoung. I don’t want to get revenge, but I want everyone involved to get what they deserve. You know, back then I never would have thought that the job my father forced on me would someday help you. I always hated him and myself for not being able to change it. But as soon as we win this fight, I will finally realize my dream and write a book about our life. What happened to you and Saeyoung should go public and I will fight for it!’’ you told him.

He hugged you and took you in his arms, carrying you to your shared bed.

,,We should pay our respect to your father and visit him over the weekend,’’ he whispered and waited for your answer, but you already fell asleep.

,,Thank you, Mc,’’ he whispered before he also fell asleep.

Jihyun

,,I never thought that in the two years I wasn’t around you, you would actually change your job. I’m happy that now you’re able to do what you always wanted to do,’’ Jihyun praised you.

,,Yes, thank you. I never liked working in a hospital, although I grew with the job. 

But today, writing about all these things helped me.

And I finally showed my parents that a writer can also be something to look up to,’’ you smiled as you watched your daughter Lucy.

,,Did you ever speak to them again?’’ he asked you.

Your parents and his father didn’t come to your wedding; that was why only the RFA came.

It was kind of sad that the only true friends you guys had were the RFA, but everyone else weren’t really people you would call friends.

,,No, well, having a daughter going from being a surgeon to being an author is something to feel disappointed about, apparently,’’ you laughed sadly.

,,I will never ever forbid Lucy to do anything she loves,’’ you said and then looked over to Jihyun.

He nodded and agreed with you.

Your husband hugged you and kissed your cheek, he had to think about the time he first saw that you actually published something. He could only imagine how hard that time must have been for you.

He was also kind of sad that he wasn’t there with you. Jumin told him later that he actually supported you a lot without even telling you because he knew that you would have never accepted his help.

But from now on, he would be there and support you.

For you, and for the sake of his family and friends.

Vanderwood

One day, when Vanderwood was cleaning up after the two of you moved in, he saw a box.

The box, which was standing in the middle of a room, was getting on his nerves so much that the long haired man decided to throw it away, thinking that it was nothing but trash in there.

However, he soon realized that he had been horribly wrong.

The box slipped out of his hands and a lot of papers fell out.

,,Huh?’’ he asked himself as he picked one up, the words “chapter one” written on it.

One by one, Vanderwood sorted the papers and actually noticed that three whole books were inside the box as single pages.

Just when Vanderwood was at chapter six of one of the books, you entered, the cleaning session long forgotten when you arrived.

,,What is that?’’ you asked him when you saw that he actually read something from your books.

,,You should tell me, don’t you know that that’s against the copyrights? I mean, you are a lawyer, you should know that-’’ Vanderwood quickly stayed silent when he saw your tears.

,,I can hide this scandal, you know?’’ he whispered.

But he was totally wrong.

,,I wrote it years ago. Back when my father lost a trial because of a lawyer. At that time, he forced me to become one too to get revenge.

And so I had to give up on my books,’’ you told him.

,,But your father died! Who cares?! Change jobs!’’ he said, a bit louder.

,,With what money should we pay for the appartnemnt with… and the food?’’ you asked him and laughed. He seemed to forget that he still didn’t have a job and that you were the only one with an income.

,,We will manage. I will make it come true,’’ he told you, and indeed, Vanderwood made everything you wished for come true.

You didn’t know how, and he asked you to not ask about his methods, but your books were published. You could work as an author and could give up what you didn’t enjoy and he was actually working as your manager.

,,I told you to clean the keyboard twice a day!’’ he hissed while you smiled at him.

MASTERLIST 1

MASTERLIST 2

MASTERLIST 3

29.03.2021// 22:26 MEST

[closetedotaku01]

i rlly hope youll keep writing after Kinktober, bc as a writer myself i see so much potential in your writing. it's already great, but it really reminds me of my own writing from a year or two back. i was the one who asked how long you've been writing & i've been writing fanfic for 7 years so its cool to see how good you already are. youre going to improve so much over time & i'm really excited to see it, you do so many things in your stories well & theyre only going to get better! (1/2)

THIS GOT SO LONG IM SORRY!!!

This.... I—. WARMED MY HEART!! Pick a name or emoji or whatever you want and you are an official anon!! Also this got long so.. READ MORE IF YA WANNA!!

Thank you so much for saying you see potential. Sometimes I’m really.... unhappy with my work and feel like I can’t improve and this just... MADE ME SO HAPPY!! Like... hearing it from someone who does write💜💜💜💜💜 makes my whole life.

I’m so excited to keep growing and I hope you stay for the journey because this is so sweet. Maybe casually come off anon way down the road (so I can’t guess) just so I can read some of your work too 👉👈. And no worries there will be more after Kinktober. I am really enjoying this and have no plans to stop writing any time soon.

~~~~

Okay so my favorite published authors are Jandy Nelson (I’ll Give You The Sun is a book I reread constantly. It’s my comfort book. I swear if my soul was anywhere besides my body, there’s a piece of it trapped in that book.), Fredrick Backman (specifically And Every Morning the Way Home Gets Longer and Longer), Brigid Kemmerer (literally all of the books she’s published with Bloomsbury I’ve read and adored), and Neal Schusterman (Specifically the Arc of a Scythe Trilogy). They all write in ways that affect me deeply and they mean a lot to me. I don’t necessarily try to emulate them, but they definitely are the authors I consult (by reading and rereading their works) to get ideas and to learn how to write.

~~~~

Fanfic authors. I think I’ve made it pretty damn clear on here that I am hopelessly in love with @imaginethathaikyuu (I’m still too scared to tag her I’m sorry) and her writing. She means the whole world to me in every way. Her writing always hits me in a MAGICAL way. Especially her newer pieces. Works of hers that hit hard for me are: (please note this list is not comprehensive. These are just the FIRST ONES that came to mind. All her work is objectively great.) 

-Tsukishima accidentally teases his s/o’s insecurity - this one holds my heart.

-Heated argument with Tsukishima - this is the angst I adore. Honestly, this might be one of my TOP TOP favorites, because it feels so real. 

-Morning sex with Tsukishima -just the line “theyre your tits!” That’s all. Brings me serotonin beyond words. And it feels so genuine and lovely. Again... she makes the world so real. Also in my TOP TOP favs. (Is my Tsukki love showing too much?)

-Helping you when you can’t sleep - This is beyond words beautiful

-Helping you study - PLEASE I NEED THIS NOW

-Tanaka finding out his s/o is pregnant - YES! SHE DOES TANAKA SO WELL

-Tanka asks Kiyoko to dance.... but she says no - SO WELL 

-Riding Headcanons -🙈

-S/O is nervous about him going down on her  -because who ISNT the first time?

-Learning about your self-harm scars -hits close to home and Iwa’s makes me cry every time.

-Akaashi making it up to you after a fight -my favorite color is literally purple 💜

-Bokuto’s s/o has a nightmare - I literally revisit this one whenever I have a nightmare

- Kinktober 2019 - ALL .... but the ones I revisit the most are Tsukishima’s, Oikawa’s, Futakuchi’s, Yaku’s, Iwa’s, Yamaguchi’s, and Matsukawa’s.

-Kinktober 2020 - please GOD read Kuroo’s, Mattsun’s, Iwa’s, Suna’s, and Atsumu’s. They’re all immaculate but those in PARTICULAR were MASTERPIECES.

-Having an angsty fight - particularly Kuroo’s GETS TO ME. Like... damn. Makes me... melt. Idek why. It’s just, again, how real she makes it feel. From the atmosphere and setting to the way the characters behave. A lot of times in “argument angst” (is that a term?) the arguments feel so shallow and stupid. And I’m like “on my moodiest days I wouldn’t react like that” or “Kuroo WOULD NEVER”. But these feel so real. Ughhhh.

-You give Kenma a gift mid-stream 

-Kenma gets turned on during a stream - can you tell I love the way she writes streamer Kenma 😌 also this is my fav nsfw-esque Kenma piece solely because it feels accurate to his character in a beautiful way despite me headcanoning that he’s ace.

-Oikawa’s s/o wakes up without him there

-Iwaizumi getting.... caught.... by Makki and Mattsun... with you  -Give Iwa More Love 2020

-Tendo teasing his s/o by ... taking care of himself - One of the first Em pieces I ever read. I don’t think it was THE first. But it was definitely the first one I read like... RIGHT AFTER she posted it.

-Tendo comforting s/o who’s parents yell - hits very close to home for me, and I just wanted him to come whisk me away the first time I read this

-7MIH with Tendo  -hehe I love this more than anything. Also Ushijima’s ONE line makes me CACKLE. I’m in love with this one

-This two part series with Atsumu (1) (2) -haha I reread these too often

-Kneel to Pray  (Sakusa) -I have not even one criticism or negative thought. Not one. And I’ve read this TOO many times.

-Tough boys are soft for you - two of the best boys

- Countdown to Christmas - Days 6,7,11, and 12 are the ones I reread the most

THIS IS SO BAD!! I WENT STRAIGHT TO THESE AND DIDN’T THINK IT WAS THAT MANY COS I REREAD THESE ONES REGULARLY. (And there’s a lot more theatre good. Please explore her blog! It’s WONDERFUL) Sorry for spending too much time on Em’s blog, but also.... not sorry cos she’s amazing and all of these pieces inspire me.  I’ll try to be fast for the rest of these ahfihfadsfsjfh.

 @star-puff (catch a theme of me being scared of talented authors)’s piece La Lune and her Fleur d’Amour event (search #fleur d’amour on her blog) are so creative and beautiful and truly show how talented she is. She’s amazing. EDIT: I’m adding this as soon as I’ve read it because it just made me cry. Omg. Read this. Tsukishima royalty AU it is angst though so 👀 read at your own risk. EDIT: On GOD Meg could murder me and I’d say thanks. Please read this beautiful time stamp shit it makes me HAPPY. 

UPDATE: And Meg is now responsible for the most canon Tsukki piece I’ve ever read. 

There’s a cute SMAU called Sunshine by @pudding-head-kenma and idk how she does it. It’s so good. I could never tell a story this complex, THIS WELL, using only text messages and tweets and such. She also does mini headcanons that are REALLY cute.

Anything and everything by @haik-choo is gold. Literal gold. The way she writes Tsukishima is IMMACULATE. Toxic headcanons, mischaracterizations all of its gold. And she’s a beautiful shitposter. She drops shit that makes me CACKLE at the most random times. All of it is a big yes for me.

UPDATE: this is gold.

Of course I’ve read In Another Life and OF COURSE I sobbed. Took me AN HOUR to read because I kept having to take breaks to just.... sob. VERY MUCH A HEAVY DUTY ANGST. Not for the weak of heart. BokuAka. This is probably the oldest piece I’ve read that still HITS for me. 

There are other pieces but I can’t remember them.... probably will come back and add to this post later.

Thank you for this ask. Thank you for being so kind and inspiring. I was kinda worried about releasing anything I’ve ever written and still get nervous sometimes so this ask makes me feel a hell of a lot better and makes me feel like I’m joining a WONDERFUL community like... Look at all that talent ^^^^.

[frankiefellinlove]

Here’s the story to go with the photo

Text of their conversation for those who have never seen it. “People” magazine first published it in 84 somewhere.

A space cleared around them, and both remained standing.

"Hi," said Jackson, extending his hand. "I just read a story about you in PEOPLE magazine. It was very good."

"Oh, thanks," grinned Springsteen. "I really enjoyed seeing your show tonight."

"I hear you play long concerts. How long do you go?"

"Oh, about three hours."

"How do you do it? Do you take a break?"

"Yeah, about a half hour. It works out pretty good, I guess."

A camera clicked, eyes strained, ears tilted. Jackson's eyes flitted about the room, never pausing long enough to see. He seemed anxious to think of another question, the way he seemed anxious onstage at the end of a song to sing another song. Springsteen sucked on an ice cube.

"Did you write that song Fire [sung by the Pointer Sisters]?" Jackson asked.

"Yeah, that was a quick one. Only took me about 10 minutes. But I don't write when I'm on the road. Can you?"

"No," said Jackson, "There's too much going on."

His hands fidgeted for a home, folding in front of him, then connection behind him, then looping over the unused belt loops of his pants. A reggae song came on the television nearby, and he started a dance step, then stopped himself.

Couldn't he simply ask Springsteen back into his empty bedroom so they could talk like two normal human beings, maybe discover that they both loved watching reruns of The Honeymooners? Or was the anxiety of intimacy perhaps greater for him than the anxiety of holding center stage?

During the lull Michael seemed to be looking for a prop. "My secretary, Shari, wants you for Christmas," he said, putting his arm around her waist and pulling her between them.

"What's wrong with Thanksgiving?" laughed Springsteen, as the three posed for Jackson's personal photographer.

"Do you talk to people during your concerts?" Jackson asked. "I read that you do."

"Yeah, I tell stories. People like that, I've learned. They like to hear your voice do something besides singing. They go wild when you just…talk."

"Oh, I could never do that. It feels like people are learning something about you they shouldn't know."

"I kinda know what you mean - the songs are a protection. But I remember once I played for a Vietnam veterans' benefit and I had to go onstage to introduce this guy who was a president or something, and I didn't have my guitar. Man, I was shaking. I realized it was the first time in 15 years I'd been onstage without it, and I've never been so nervous in my life."

Jackson's voice grew softer, so no one could hear. "Do you like talking in front of all these people? It feels kind of strange."

"Yeah, it is strange, isn't it?"

Jackson took a deep breath, then took a small step toward the door. Springsteen's boots remained planted. He broke the pause. "How long did you rehearse for this tour?" he asked.

"Oh, one or two months."

"There's so many cues in that show."

"Yes, there is a lot of technology….We'll finish up in December. Then we're going to do a movie."

"Yeah, I heard about that - with Steven Spielberg?"

"Yes, as a matter of fact, I just spoke on the phone with him today," Jackson said. "It's not certain just what the movie will be yet, but it will be with him."

Pause. Jackson's hands rapped the rhythm of the reggae song on his thighs, his eyes hopping like sparrows.

"I read you go right to sleep after you perform. You can't really do that, can you?" Jackson asked.

"No, I feel good after a concert, because I feel like I've worked hard. I stay up till about 4. What do you do?"

"I watch TV or read," said Jackson. "I can't go to sleep."

"Don't you ever go out?" Springsteen asked.

"I can't. Too many people would bother me….How did you decide to let PEOPLE magazine do that story on you?"

"I just rolled the dice," said Springsteen, blowing on his fist and tossing imaginary dice.

"Oh," said Jackson, shaking his head. "I could never trust anyone enough to do that."

He took another fleeing scan of the room, his bank of questions emptied. "Well, I think I'm gonna slide on out now," he said quietly. "It was real nice meeting you." He thrust out his hand quickly and walked through the door to another part of the suite.

Springsteen lingered for a moment. A little earlier he had seen Jackson do things for more than an hour and a half onstage that appeared almost effortless. But this was something Springsteen seemed more familiar with, 15 minutes of a human being struggling.

"You know," he said, spitting an ice cube back into his cup, "He's just a real nice guy."