#so i'm cutting it here despite having more thoughts those can be hc posts

[bravevolunteer]

VERSE — MOVIE ( CONTAINS SPOILERS & CANON DIVERGENT, tw for canon-typical themes & suicide mention )

just to get straight to the point : it's mainly canon divergent in the sense that i will be altering details in order to make mike an afton. do i think this is going to happen in the movie timeline? no. do i think it's more likely that they're going to explain the oddly personal kidnapping through mirroring the emilys? probably. but it's MY michael afton blog and i can put on my tinfoil hat as much as i want about it. of course i am willing to adapt based on other's info / preferences but given that this isn't my main canon anyway it is meant for those that are interested.

Mike thought he knew everything there was to know about what happened to his family: what he was never told is who his real father was. He was too young to remember anything about William Afton before his mom separated herself from him entirely ( one night stand, breakup, what have you, i'm not picky- ), so he always thought of the father he grew up with as his dad, the reality never changed anything about that.

Until he was twelve years old and Garrett went missing, and everything fell apart. William followed the Schmidts there, taking Garrett in a targeted attack ( whether or not he was trying to grab Mike, took him out of spite, anything else is also flexible ). Everything grew solemn and tense, each of the Schmidts lost in their own individual grief. Slowly, they stopped having dinners together, stopped going out as a family, stopped being able to feel like things were normal. The grief and guilt only added to Mike's developing anger issues and depression. Although it wasn't on purpose nor with any malicious intent, his dad was the more distant of his parents at the time, serving as the first hint towards his biological parentage and simply because as much as he cared for mike, he was grappling with losing his biological kid ( think tse henry- well meaning but drowning in grief enough for the child to pick up on it ).

This is where Abby comes in, where the Schmidts have another kid in an attempt to feel like a normal family again. It almost seems to work, although there is still that underlying sense of collective grief. Mike was older by then, too ( while he graduates high school, he either doesn't go to college at all or doesn't finish it ).

Their mom dies and the brief sense of possible stability disappears again. It's when Mike is staying at home again for the funeral/to help with Abby that their father commits suicide, unable to take the grief. Mike has had custody of Abby since then.

The events proceed as they did in the movie, William's recognition of Mike in the office not only stemming from the kidnapping but the fact that it's his kid, although Mike doesn't find anything out beyond the fact that it's the man who took Garrett. There is potential for more hints towards this in past interactions with his aunt or birth records or even his dynamic with Vanessa, but for the most part this specific realization is left open.

Following the movie's events, he... does come home to his aunt in the living room. After reporting her death, Mike actually goes back to Freddy's one more time to get security footage in order to prove his innocence. Afterwards, he does his best to hold down another job to keep taking care of Abby in peace, but something about Freddy's gives him the sense that he'll come back to make sure nothing like this happens again.

[the-travelling-witch]

Hello! I'm sending this to my favorite writers to enable you to brag about your own writings! (But don't feel pressured to reply and take your time!) :D

Pick one fic you wrote and would recommend to us readers for each of these genres:

Fluff, Hurt/Comfort, Hurt/No Comfort, AU (any AUs!), Selfship (If you selfship!), [Insert a genre you've written but is not in the list].

Have fun, and just a reminder to always be proud of what you created!! You're amazing!! We love you!!! 💗

Extra // Feel free to ramble on why the fic is your favorite, whatever thinking process you have when you wrote it, which part(s) are your favorite, etc!!

ahhhh this is such a cool ask to get, thank you so much!! also your favourite writers? and that includes me of all people??? don’t mind me, someone might be cutting onions in here 🥺🩵

i hope you don’t mind me rambling, i might have gotten a little carried away ^^; (i’ve also not really heeded the one per genre rule, i’m just bad at picking one or the other hshsh)

Fluff

one of each huh? i think we’re already running into a problem on the fluff genre, i don’t really have anything to recommend, i’m afraid; none of them really stand out to me personally (that aren’t aus or so), so i’d much rather talk more about my other works

Hurt / Angst

now to hop into the categories i really like talking about, hurt and angst!! :D out of anything comfort related, i think i like my period comfort scenarios for both obey me and twst. i wrote them to alleviate my own pains in a way, but it’s great to see other people getting comfort from them as well (also to all my folks who told me you felt included by the gn reader instead of a fem reader, i see you and i love you)

with the mushy gushy stuff out of the way, let’s dive into my absolute favourite genre to write ever, angst (no comfort hehe ^^); here’s the problem to not list too many fics but i’ll use my spare from not naming a fluff fic :]

long-time ramble and tag readers will know what to expect; what could’ve been is the first angst fic i really got into and could’ve easily been a series if i had thought about it at the time. while looking back on it, sure there are things i could’ve done better, but it still has a soft spot in my heart and despite the low notes, it’s the fic i got the best feedback on ever (those asks, comments and reblogs are so precious to me, you have no idea)

similarly a million miles away and the loneliest (same premise, different characters) are some of my favourites too. overall, in its entirety, i prefer the former, i think most parts in there came out very well. however, if i had to pick one part out of all eight that i would recommend, it’s xiao’s part from the loneliest, it didn’t gather as much attention as part 1 but my friends left so many amazing comments in my document and i myself love how it came out, which makes it so special to me

Selfships + OCs

while i do selfship, i hardly ever write about it on here (or much in general outside some hcs i pester some moots with); for one, i find it hard to write about, my thoughts seem to leave me the second i try to type them out. i also don’t think many people are interested in the topic anyway and i hate feeling like i’m shouting into a void (i’m trying to keep a lid on how much i babble on dash anyhow, with varying amounts of success ^^;)

i thought i read ocs on the list, so i’ll include them, as well, especially since i have a little more to say than about selfships, considering i post about some of them every now and then. dantalion and his story part have a special place in my heart, not only because he was the first oc i introduced, but also bc his part resonates with me most, i think. while not seen much of yet, i also took a liking to my twst oc cheron, i think he’s fun!! (ofc i like my other obey me ocs too but these two are ranked a little higher hshshs)

AUs

this one… might be obvious. i think we can all see the modern au coming from a mile away (perhaps even from a million miles away haha). it’s kind of the only au i have really going on but, even so, there’s a reason my inbox fills up the second i mention it. though, when i wrote that piercer! xiao fic all that time ago, the au wasn’t even a thing in my mind yet, funny how that works. it’s currently on a bit of a hiatus but it’s certainly not dead ^^;

more excitingly however, and as a treat for the people who’ve read this far into me rambling about my own writing, the aus in my drafts!! i want to work on all of them (and then work on none of them)

the oldest of the three i’m thinking about is my haikyuu isekai au. i’m 10k into the draft (plus like 2k notes) and i still think the premise and plot is super fun (i was thinking/hoping it would end up somewhere between 20k and 25k) buuut the problem is i’m currently stuck on one scene that’s just not turning out fun at all, so i’ve been neglecting it ever since ^^;

second on the list of aus that occupy my mind is my twst pokemon au!! this one is more recent but i’ve been enjoying doing world building for it + the people i’ve let read over my first draft of a intro seem to have liked it too!! i’ll have to give more intense and focused thought to brainstorming the story we’d be follow, but i get excited every time i think about it hehe

and lastly, the most recent thing i worked on, an au for barbarian bakugo and… well i won’t say anything on the identity of the reader yet. it is a little enemies to lovers and i have already planned out part 2 in my head despite not even remotely finishing part 1. it doesn’t help that the book i’m reading rn evolves the same themes and makes me think about it every time i look at it or pick it back up :]

(there’s also an au i might want to write for mermay but idk if i can finish it in time + the bakugo au weighs heavy on my mind rn hshsh)

as a last point, i’m also keeping in mind that i had an event planned!! i haven’t finalised it yet and haven’t given much thought to my own entries but maybe i can get there some day (perhaps towards the end of the year?) ^^

anyway, thank you so much for indulging me and prompting me to talk about my writing, as you can probably tell, i love doing that haha and thank you again for the kind words, it really means the world to me <3

if you have any questions or thoughts on any of these, feel free to ask me!! i’d be happy to talk about any of this :> (though i can’t promise fast replies…)

[hanzajesthanza]

omg 👀👀 i was looking thru ang content on tumblr and i saw an old post of yours about the dandelion+countess stael=ang theory and !!! I actually had wondered earlier if you were at all interested/supported this theory bc I read about it awhile back and actually love it so much? :,) It's a favorite hc of mine and I may have tried to subtly incorporate it into my ang design...i just think its too Incheresting an idea not to explore tbhhhh

oh wow! i remember this theory :)...!

post explaining the theory in case anyone is confused

or tl;dr of the theory: essentially, it's that dandelion is 38 years old, dandelion knew countess de stael 19 years ago, dandelion has a penchant for lovin' and leavin' 'em, angouleme is 19 years old and is the daughter of an unknown noblewoman and some scoundrel that seduced her. and they're both blonde.

this is from june of 2019, which should provide some context.

(okay, so... sorry for long and kind of serious response to a lighthearted ask <3 i do not want to spare the details!)

firstly, i was never too fond of it as a serious headcanon in the first place, i proposed it as more of a crack theory. i wanted more reason for dandelion and angouleme to get more attention, and i thought, no harm done in a silly "what if", right? well...

secondly, only a few months after i came up with this theory... netflix's witcher premiered, and... it immediately became insufferable to have headcanons and theories about dandelion because of the shift in fan culture. i did not want to associate with the fans who were making farfetched theories about jaskier-dandelion.

due to the behavior of the netflix community, which in my experience completely disregarded canon facts and characterization, AUs and "what if"s overall stopped being fun to engage with. in reaction to the netflix fandom culture, i felt a need to stop making "weird-fun-silly" headcanons, theories, etc. that would contradict or cut against the grain of canon, and instead focus on headcanons, theories, etc. that would either support or be supported by canon. it's somewhat regretful, but i think it taught me an important lesson about why i'm here, and it deepened my appreciation of the storytelling and literary qualities of the witcher.

thirdly, since more time has passed since then, i've also engaged with new headcanons... @toussaintred and i came up with a lot of headcanons about the countess de stael and dandelion's interactions with her in august 2021. instead of being a romantic peer-to-peer relationship, she was a mature woman who he developed a crush on and was inspired to change his life and identity because of her.

i ended up writing a post about those headcanons re: dandelion and the countess de stael as they exist now, if you are interested :')

but most importantly the reason i didn't go through with this headcanon is because i want dandelion and angouleme to exist in the same space without their relationship being fraught with tragedy and disdain; i think, were he her father, she wouldn't be able to even look at him. and the guilt may destroy him, too.

it's also, for me... i have this interpretation of the hanza in that they have all made such mistakes or been the victims of mistreatment in their lives, but despite these strong emotions, they cannot go back into the past and confront the people who hurt them, or apologize to the people they hurt. all they can do now is live in the present and try to do better in the future. for each member of the hanza, there is no closure.

i see this with cahir, who harmed ciri and cannot undo that, but has now joined the company and denounced nilfgaard. i see it with regis, who destroyed his own life and pushed everyone away, but is now seeking humanity. i see it with milva, who has spilt and lost blood of her own, and learning vulnerability. and angouleme... angouleme cannot know her parents, they abandoned her and will always have abandoned her. they receive no second chances, she'll never know them, and has to deal with that emptiness which persists with her. even when in the company, which comforts her... despite her beginning to heal and try to take care of herself, she'll never find closure about her mother or father, because they're irrevocably gone.

i also think dandelion and angouleme can have a really positive relationship without a biological connection between them. i mean, i think the thought could occur to dandelion: "she is younger than, i suppose, however old little eye is now. plague, she could even be the daughter i never had- ptu, will never have..." but i don't see dandelion ever having a father-daughter relationship with her. it's more like his relationship with ciri, where it takes a village to raise a child, and he's a close friend of the family...

but i do think dandelion would impart some knowledge onto her, especially that around politics and how to navigate the social interactions of a court, which she wants to do but is unfamiliar with. it's somewhat ironic, because he himself completely disregards these kinds of manners and formalities. but he does know them, so he can tell her... dandelion and angouleme have opposite relationships with nobility and i think the most interesting thing about them in beauclair would be that dandelion is using his noble identity to secure a life he wants, but a life that contradicts his broader identity and desires in life, because his vision is clouded by the dreams of toussaint...

[td-brick]

do you have LGBTQ+ headcanons that you're particularly attached to? If so, which ones for which characters?

YES so many LOLLL under the cut cuz I rambled a bit. Also I'm afraid all of them are lesbian headcanons because I am + I really like analyzing stuff from that perspective. also sorry if any of these aren't very eloquent i'm not good at putting my thoughts into words but I hope this answers your question well enough!

And there's a couple more but these are like. the big ones i guess. or the ones I think about most often

Brick: Yeah obviously i was gonna say this. i usually headcanon characters as butch lesbians anyways but my friend headcanons her as a trans girl and i adopted that too and in my perspective its an interesting read on her character... it just means a lot to me i guess. i talked about this more in depth already (here and here) but idk if those held up/are still good. so you judge that for yourself but i guess it gives more perspective on that specifically

Courtney: She's so lesbian to me... i don't really know how to word this properly but like. her comphet goes crazy... it's like she's so nitpicky about how her boyfriends/male love interests act and behave that to an extent it seems like she doesnt even want a boyfriend. she's just performing heterosexuality by trying to make every guy that likes her into her idea of a "perfect man" but its not because she's attracted to a specific type of man, its bc she wants to be seen as the perfect girl and in her mind that's a straight woman (so internalized homophobia + comphet). like notice how she has a very specific idea of a guy in mind that she's supposedly into and wants to change duncan/scott/whoever else into but shes never actually into a guy like that. its only people who she would have to mold into being like that bc imo that's the only way she would be able to stomach being in a long term relationship with a man without feeling Wrong about it i guess

Jo: Admittedly her being a lesbian to me is mostly based off appearances, and I wouldn't call her good rep of butch/gnc women by any means, but she is to me. like you'd have a hard time convincing me of anything else. she's literally just a butch lesbian. Apparently people think this is stereotypical or something and yeah maybe but just bc it is doesn't mean butches will stop existing and i think it's nice we can find comfort/happiness in seeing masculine women in stuff we like as butches (despite how poorly the show treats them for being masculine)

Heather: She straight up just doesn't show interest in men canonically (except alejandro, who I see as a woman anyways) except when she's using it for strategic purposes/her own personal gain. I also think a lot of her disdain for romance from her teammates is not just bc she's unhappy and hateful but also because she's personally not interested in romance like they are (aka m/f romance). Also semi-related I've seen people say she was mean to lindsay/leshawna because she liked them and i personally hate that rhetoric, lesbian or not 😭 especially since a lot of her actions towards leshawna were racist and not just plain old mean. I do like heathsay though (<- I also like pinkberry (bmc) and I think they have a similar dynamic which is a discussion for a whole other post. but i thought yall should know)

Alejandro: I just think she's more interesting/her gimmick is more fun as a woman. She's a character I like already but its really just more fun to me to imagine her as a lesbian. And I headcanoned her as such already but one of my friends hcs her as an intersex woman and I thought that was really interesting so I just adopted that as well lol

Harold: trans girl + lesbian.. again this was initially adopted from a friend but I think it makes a lot of sense. Sorry for not elaborating on this one as much i do have thoughts on it but I don't really know how to phrase them right now? maybe ill elaborate another time idk I've written about it before but I don't think it's up to snuff enough to post on here (yet)

[xo-cuteplosion-xo]

Hey Lu!♡♡

Saw this post and thought, why not send in a req!

I'm not into genshin, but I'm still v much into bsd, so can I req a dazai x reader where the reader is a fresher in clg? Honestly, anything dazai x reader is lovely :D

Only if ur okay, ofc♡♡ and if u do write this, it can be any format!

Lots n lots of love,

Teacup♡

Thank you for the request!

College au!

(I’m a sucker for these au’s T_T)

Dazai x reader

Freshmen in college (AU!)

~

Little scenario + Hc’s

~

I believe interactions with a college Dazai would be dictated by relationship status/how it progressed.

So for the purpose of hc’s friends to lovers :)

Dazai’s a social menace

He’s a smooth talker, he’s attractive, intelligent (even if his grades don’t show it)

He’s one of those “I’ll show up to classes for the test, ace it and be fine” mentalities

He’s not a note-taker, and on rare occasions where he actually shows he’s more or less dozing off.

He prefers individual studies despite his seemingly social nature.

With that out of the way, your relationship.

There are a ton of ways that possibly got you two together.

Most likely from a common interest, probably something on a more chaotic side.

Dazai will, if you can’t attend a lesson, go for you.

He’s sweet like that.

He’s a little lazy though-

He will help you with your workload, especially if you're stuck, all because he wants your attention on him, not the work-

He likes late-night drinks, late-night movie nights, late-night cuddles ETC.

Even if he’s in a different year, he’s just as sweet, possibly sweeter than if you were in the same year.

If you plead enough, he might spend free time with you at the library, so you can better write a paper.

He could be described as a little clingy, but it’s just his way of making sure you know he cares… he’s not the best at expressing feelings.

Scenario below the cut

A yawn left Dazai’s lips, eyes half-lidded with his head on your lap. Your hand rubbed through his hair, playing with it enjoying the soft feeling. He shifted around here and there as you read through a textbook for a class. He always looked younger, less tired, more put together when he was on the verge of sleep, or when he was relaxed with his walls completely down for you. It had taken months of trust and getting to know each other before Dazai was able to be this vulnerable with you.

Dazai reached as if he were stretching to conveniently knock the book from your hands. “Ah, whoops, apologies, I’m so clumsy.” Dazai hummed as you sighed, glancing at the time. You supposed it was time to set studying aside for a bit anyway. Your boyfriend needed attention, and it was indeed getting late.

“You could have said you wanted more attention.” You chuckled as he rolled his eyes, a playful smile crossing his lips as he wrapped his arms around your torso. He wasn’t one of too many words late at night, preferring physical connection, as if reassuring himself you were real, not some fiction he imagined. And you too liked to hold onto him to feel safe and loved by somebody who wholly accepted you no matter what. You shifted on the sofa until you were laying down, your limbs tangled within his embrace. He set his forehead against yours, before kissing you softly, eyes still on the verge of completely closing. You chuckled, giving him the same kiss back, before tilting your head to lay against his chest, his chin resting on the top of your head.

“Love you.”

[ravysu]

Sannin headcanons and thoughts

The last thing I would like to post for the sannin week. It is still 24.04 here! :D @sannin-central

This is long. Spoiler alert. Mostly Orochimaru, some Tsunade, a little of Jiraiya (because his story is pretty clear and spoken and idk what I can add). Also I recommend to read this meta about Orochimaru, it has influenced me a lot and has some good points. Sorry for any posible grammar mistakes. Also I really should put here a lot of references to the manga or anime but it was something that was piling up for a year and I'm soooooooo lazy. After all, those are just headcanons. Also: Im not excusing Oro's bad stuff here, Im trying to understand the reasons.

Ive already posted some hcs, here, here and here.

1. First if all, the chronology pic of sannin lifetime based on the info i found on naruto wiki and also some statements about wars from this post. It was tough considering what a mess naruto’s chronology is.

2. Sannin story shows what it cost to be a legend. They're like Team 7 but more realistic. Tsunade literally carried the war but left with nothing and developed a ptsd and have problems to just live on. Also anger control issues. I think she can be pretty bossy and stubborn which is not always nice. Jiraiya is the hero of the day but also very idealistic and can ignore some important details in the real word whether its the fight (he always injured during flashbacks maybe because each time he took too much to handle and on the one hand it's heroistic but on the other is a mistake that can lead your team to situations like in that Iwa cave) or your friends issues (I bet he saw what's going on but thought it's fine until Oro actually got red handed and left). He lives in his world and may have problems to get out to see it through someone else's shoes. As for Orochimaru, it seems like he was a normal guy for 20+ years (I mean, he didn't do crazy criminal shit and had something good in him and it was stated somewhere that it was his teammates influence. It is obvious they considered him as a friend, I don't thinks it was for nothing) but we mostly know his darkest side. Despite being a moster he is a human that have empathy and some ordinary human traits (man just decorates every bit of an environment he is in lol).

3. Tsunade was the leader of team Hiruzen.

4. Tsunade sometimes hit Jiraiya for some stupid things he did or said but never touches Orochimaru even if he did something same. Jiraiya complained about it once and almost got another hit.

5. Jiraiya had problematic parents that didn't care about him much and a lot of time he was wandering in the streets.

6. Judging by the look of Oro bangs and hair, he sometimes cut it off. A stress relief huh? And the fact that he doesn't do it now in Boruto..

7. It was shown that Tsunade and Orochimaru was acknowledged before they become a team. Maybe they did just before, or maybe some longer time before. I prefer the second option and hc that they met because both had no real friends - Orochimaru seemed weird and scary for everyone and Tsunade was Senju so everyone wanted to hang out with her but didn't really care. They weren't seen as what they were - people put the labels on them. But they didn't care about each other's labels and actually saw each other in true lights.

8. Tsunade knew it was an accident and it's not right but still she blamed Orochimaru for Nawaki's death for some time. It was something that seriously damaged their friendship and the team. Orochimaru was mad but also guilty, after all, he was responsible at least as a shinobi since Nawaki was under his watch. So he started to act cold and emotionless and was trying to distance himself from his teammates.

9. Jiraiya was in Ame while Dan died.

10. The whole his orphans mission was a bit irresponsible tbh. They already fought Hanzo and as he stated the conflict between Konoha and Ame is going to an end with Konoha's win. It's weird to stay here for three years in the middle of the war while there were other lands to fight. He left his teammates for some idea. Maybe that caused another crack in their team friendship.

11. If Tsunade would have find a way to live on with her trauma and follow the will of fire and stuff it would affect Orochimaru as well just as her grief affected him. It's like he would get an example that you can live on with this pain. So death isn't above human capability and we are not just the slaves of mortality (sounds stupid but i dont know how else to describe sorry). But as we know what he actually saw is that it broke her crucially to the point she couldnt be herself again. And so the death is above everything.

12. Oro wasn’t just acting as a cold pragmatic bitch in that cave but also tried to save Tsunade. Jiraiya knew it and that’s why he showed this sign to him like "I see what youre doing here" and that stunned Oro because he would prefer to look rather like a cold pragmatic bitch hehe

13. Just a thought. People in the village probably treated Oro as a foreigner or just wouldnt accept him because he looked so differently and had a weird attitude. That's why he sometimes didn't feel that Konoha is his home. After the wars where people were treated as means and tools, even the children, he himself developed this view on people - he dehumanized them and used as the means to his goals, just as his village did. Funny thing some people were straightly dehumanizing him too like Ibiki thought that he was a demon (tho he was a child). And he probably weren't the only one. Anyways the point is that it's logical that Orochimaru don't care about anybody but some few people, he's the product of his era. He's like Naruto that would chose the hatred way. But naruto had some good and understanding people around him and.. Orochimaru had them too, but match how Iruka treated Naruto and this Hiruzen's "I sAw tHe mAliCe in This cHiLd fRoM tHe BegGinNinG". And oro didn't even have a big ass evil fox in him. sry i hate hiruzen

ANYWAYS the moral of the story is not "go criminal if they hurt you" but always treat people like people. Waving my hand to Kant.

14. The reason why Orochimaru didn't pick some good morals to stick with through the hard times no matter what (like, idk, Jiraiya or Naruto) is because 1) I think he is/was pretty depending on people around him 2) the war fucked him and his friends up too much (Nawaki incident + Tsunade) 3) twisted addictions (though I don't think he's that sadistic, we never saw him torturing randoms just for fun, it was always some science experimental shit. He tends to get fun out of cruelty only when it's personal) that maybe developed as a way to sublimate anger and sadness caused by his parents loss (that's what they share with sasuke - unlicke naruto, they knew their parents and it's other kind of pain. Sasuke developed a revenge issue and Orochimaru - cruelty pleasure which... is kinda the same but less epic and more occasional lol).

15. Speaking of that, Orochimaru cared for Sasuke because he saw himself in him.

16. Oro hold grudges against Hiruzen for not choosing him to be Hokage not only because he was ambitious and/or egoistic, but also because Hiruzen was some kind of a father figure for him and his approval was important tho i doubt he was aware of that. He also probably could tell that Hiruzen was suspicios about him when he was a child and that led to many conflicts and was hurting as well.

17. Tsunade knew things weren't pretty with Orochimaru after the wars but she never expected them to be this bad. During the week that she was given in her arc she thought not only about how much she wants to see Nawaki and Dan again despite how wrong would it be but also was trying to bury all the good memories she had left of Orochimaru so it would be easier to kill him.

18. She poisoned Jiraiya exactly because she knew he would not let her do it. Jiraiya was always hesitant to kill and inclined to forgiveness, while Tsunade, as mentioned by Orochimaru, could be merciless (so much so that he was not surprised when Kabuto suggested that she wanted to use Jira for Edo Tensei).

19. That was one of her traits that scared Jiraiya and fascinated Orochimaru.

20. Remember how Oro grabbed Jiraiya's neck when the latter was trying to cover with hair jutsu? On the snake, in Tsnade's arc. Orochimaru could have easily kill Jiraiya by pulling the sword out of the mouth (arteries are right there) but he didn't. As well as he could kill Tsunade when she was still shaking - just aim for the neck or the heart. Instead, he just injured her lung and kicked her which is not a big deal for the kind of shinoby like her at all.. Also he helped Anko not accidentally kill herself but it would be way much profitable to let her do it. "Orochimaru has no feelings".

21. The reason he suddenly wanted to kill Tsunade instead of forcing her to heal his arms as it was planned (which is weird since it will not going to get him heals and he kinda said that he wouldn't want to kill her just minutes ago) is that not only she refused to help him (he thought he could work it out) but she also prefered the village over him (from his point of view). Out if everyone she was the closest to being able to understand him since the village caused her painful losses too but nevertheless she agreed to be on it's side.

22. He wasn't fighting her back in the end partly because he thought he deserved that. Somewhere deep inside hahah.

23. Tsunade got a fear to develop deep bonds so they probably weren't very close with Shizune (also the way she knocked her down in this hotel.. oh).

24. Orochimaru will be here when she'll die.

25. Orochimaru's eng dub to Tsunade: "I often wondered what it would be like to ring that pretty neck yours". No comments.

26. Orochimaru is either bi/pan or ace. Anything or nothing lmao

27. Hiruzen knew about at least some of the Oro’s illegal experiments and was okay just as he was okay with the Foundation all the time. Because it’s useful. Then he has discovered he went too far OR he knew everything and oro just became too inconvenient because of his methods. The way Orochimaru tells Sasuke about reasons they are well treated as the criminals is based on in his experience with Hiruzen.

28. As you may know the lyrics in Orochimaru’s music theme goes “don’t talk with the silence of the heart”. It was taken from one Indian song that also had lines like “don’t question life too much”, ”pain arose somewhere in the chest”, “don’t speak to the wounds of the heart”. Though I’m not sure 100% because I was translating it with some hindi dictionary with like zero knowledge of hindi

29. I like to think that this “silence of the heart” theme and the fact that he called his village a hidden sound village are somehow connected. The hidden sound is the possible explanation of all things waiting to be listened to but the truth is silent and you know it deep in your heart and it bothers you. The world is silent just like the life is meaningless but people can only hear. *Sigh* anyways

30. Orochimaru’s journey is the one about accepting death. When he saw Karin released her chains while was trying to get to Sasuke he understood that the death is a part of human’s strength.

Can’t wait to feel that everything I wrote is wrong or not enough or stupid and obvious lol. Anyways, it’s something that I wanted to share until I move to some other fandom.

[crestfallercanyon]

due to a fic that I'm probably never going to finish, I actually have found a headcanon where I could see Alby and Gally together romantically. And the only reason I bring this up is because someone asked about it a while ago, and I said that I didn't see it ever, but now I actually kind of love this hc despite its roots.

(Again, as I've said before, I'm happy to read fics with them together and am 100% positive it can be done well and compelling and in a way I'd adore, but in my own brain it usually doesn't align because of the way I perceive them in both canon and modern aus)

but I was thinking about what would happen post this very tragic fic I have all planned out, and what post-fic happiness might have looked like for Gally if it came in the form of a new romance. And I realized, it would probably be with someone like Alby. And then jumping off of that, I began to see patterns of how the two would come together, and it's always the same kind of scenario.

The way I can see the two of them pairing up is in modern aus, when they're a little older and already a little burned by the world, but are trying to be better.

(more under the cut, but TW: mental health, abusive relationships

The one time I see them getting together is after Gally's already been through a relationship that put him through the ringer. It ended horribly, not on his terms, and it will probably never have real closure. And moving on from it would be so damn hard. One of those times when life rips you open and while you learn how to bandage it up and keep moving, it's not scarring over. It's still this open wound that's very tender, and Gally doesn't really like talking about things until they're scars -- when they're healed as well as they can be, tough skin has grown in its stead, he is for the most part moved on, then he can talk about it freely -- but this is just not becoming that. So he doesn't talk about it. But externally, his life seems healed, he's got his job and his home and his friends, those are all in order and where they should be, so he just pretends he's fine to keep the status quo. Which is only making this wound fester and worsen and it's exhausting because he's literally bleeding out of this all the time and has no idea how to really heal it and he doesn't want to screw up everything to try.

That's when he meets Alby.

Alby in modern aus... I don't write him much, but I always headcanon him of having some mental health issues that he's been long learning how to manage, and being either a motivational speaker, a counselor, or like a group-therapy leader -- someone who helps others deal with similar problems that he's grown up with or just knows how to connect and guide people who have these sorts of life challenges. (I think it's because as a Glader I think his trauma and how he copes with it, movie or book verse, is such a huge part of him). To be specific, a lot of times I hc of having diagnosed OCD, or PTSD, clinical depression, things like that. But the key thing here is that Alby has been long learning about his coping mechanisms, and what his triggers are, and knows the signs that he's losing his balance of everything. Alby mostly does a very good job maintaining his mental health the best he can. So he's got his life pretty well together. And when hc-ing these two together, I feel like him having his life together is fairly long-standing and now he wants to put down roots.

So, when these two meet, neither are what the other thinks they are looking for. But they also hit it off in a way they weren't expecting either.

After years and years of teaching himself how to spot triggers and emotional tethers and self-guidance techniques, Alby can spot Gally's an internal disaster from a mile away, though he does admit he hides it well. And for the longest time, that would have sent Alby running. Alby's always striving for stability, consistency, and he was struggling to keep it in himself, so the last thing he thought he'd need is someone to come in with their mess and screw with his very carefully curated balance. Except the issue is, 1) everybody has baggage that makes things unstable and it's always been an unrealistic goal for him to find someone who doesn't, and 2) people who had no experience with any of the stuff he's gone through tend to patronize him for having it OR don't believe him because he's got his crap so together until shit hits the fan and he needs them for it and then they bail. And he's sick of that cycle. It's frustrating. It also brought Alby to a dark place because if his partner wasn't comfortable with his mental health, he would bury the fact he was struggling so that he didn't disappoint them. It was not good for him.

Gally for most of his life thought he was the stable fixture. Confident and sure in himself and good with boundaries. He didn't mind that between him and his ex-partners, he was the one with his shit together, because he didn't mind being his partner's safety nets. In fact, he kind of prided himself on it. Then he got himself fucking shredded. This last relationship showed him he was not those things he thought and was instead very good at: ignoring feelings of insecurity until he just feels anger which is the professionally "allowed" feeling so "hooray" for him, driving heightened emotions into physical action so he never had to think about why he felt the way he did, and having boundaries until something he's loyal to is threatened in which he tears all of them down and drives himself into the ground to try to make sure whatever he's loyal to is okay. And he's at least wary enough post-shitty relationship to understand he can't keep doing that or he's going to completely lose himself.

So, whereas in the past Gally would not have interested someone like Alby, now, he's actually kind of the perfect combination of what he needs. On the one hand, man Gally is terrible at setting up his own boundaries and putting himself first ever. But they can work on that, and honestly, the fact that this is Gally's default is kind of endearing in a terrible way (good motivations, bad outcomes). On the other hand, Gally is stable. He doesn't screw up Alby's balance at all, he's predictable, even in ways he shouldn't be, and dependable (to a fault, but Gally recognizes that in himself, they're working on it). On that note: Gally wants to learn, not just about how to help himself, he wants to learn how to keep Alby comfortable, too. Gally's genuinely interested in being there for him. He doesn't demean Alby's baggage or patronize him, nor does he freak out. He's very supportive, and he also is willing to call Alby out on his crap when Alby's lying to himself, which in the moment Alby gets upset, but Gally can take the upset if it means helping out long run. And Alby really appreciates that.

For Gally, Alby would have never interested him because he always conflated being wanted with being needed, and Alby clearly doesn't need him, so he'd never have been able to be convinced that Alby wanted him. Now, though? He knows that's not how it works. Alby not needing him? It's a comfort. And he certainly knows Alby wants him. He knows Alby cares about him, he checks in, and he expects Gally to check in as well. Alby is encouraging, and not just when he's apologizing for something, he's encouraging Gally all the time. Also, Alby doesn't let Gally drive himself into the ground. Won't. Gally hates and loves how good he is at making Gally talk through his garbage (in fact, Alby would protest him calling it 'garbage'). Deciphering what Alby wants from Gally is not this fucked up game where Gally can't win. Alby is clear with what he needs and what he wants. Gally doesn't have to worry about Alby constantly, because he knows Alby is capable all on his own.

So in the end, while the others might tease them on being so stable and kind of stoic (you two are the most adulty adults I've ever met, can't you at least pretend you're bad at taxes or something?), their friends are actually 100% on board of this relationship because it's so healthy and they both deserve it. And they clearly have fun. Because while they're both stable, they're both also extremely competitive in the same way, and they both have the same dry sense of humor (I kind of picture them getting old and having the same dynamic as Captain Holt and Kevin Cozner in B99).

So, to answer your long ago question for the second time, TMRAnon, I do see a situation for them to get together. A very very specific situation that is curated solely out of my other headcanons and niche fic ideas but, hey, that's what fandom is all about, right?