#so i was like damn there is so little ac syndicate stuff so that is unfortunate. i guess one does have to be the change they want to see in

[vadlings]

the memories of the boy i’ve been (801 words) by vadlings

Chapters: 1/1 Fandom: Assassin's Creed - All Media Types Rating: Teen And Up Audiences Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply Relationships: Ethan Frye & Jacob Frye, Evie Frye & Jacob Frye, Ethan Frye & Evie Frye & Jacob Frye Characters: Jacob Frye, Ethan Frye, Evie Frye Additional Tags: Character Study, Emotional Baggage, Bad Parenting, Family, Attention Deficit Hyperactivity Disorder, Jacob Frye Has ADHD

Summary:

Before Ethan, it had been just him, Evie, and their grandmother. Obviously they’d competed, but nothing like they did later on, when every word of praise to Evie and look of disapproval to Jacob felt like the driving force of the rift growing fast between them.

[assassinschaoticcreed]

I fucking love your posts!! XD

Gets a damn laugh outta me. 🤭🤣

I'm glad you do 🥹 honestly whenever a thought has been thunk in my brain I have to try and figure out which assassin i want it to be for each little post, and im trying to incorporate the others but I love the OG gang. (up until Syndicate basically)

other than Shay, I don't like Shay but i dont hate him- ^

I also get a little sad since the AC Fandom isn't really seen much, it's such a good series and I don't see much stuff on them 🥺 I know a lot of people that dropped the series after desmond and all that jazz. so every like, reblog etc. I get, i'm happy cause it makes me know the boys (and gals) are still loved by people 🥹

[thewriting-corner]

‘Renegades’ trilogy by Marissa Meyer: review

Welcome today to a post I have been waiting to do for months. I never do entire posts for book reviews, but since this was a trilogy (and one of my favorites I read this year) I decided it would deserve a little more.

Note: I will be doing a spoiler-free review first and then I’ll put a warning before talking about each individual book :)

Synopsis: The Renegades are a syndicate of prodigies—humans with extraordinary abilities—who emerged from the ruins of a crumbled society and established peace and order where chaos reigned. As champions of justice, they remain a symbol of hope and courage to everyone... except the villains they once overthrew.

Trilogy Review ⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️

I honestly think these are the best books I’ve ever read. The description was fascinating, easy to follow and gave amazing imagery without that heaviness that a lot of fantasy books have (this is more sci-fi/dystipia-ish but still).

The characters felt real and their individual voices were clear from start to finish. I loved every single character, even the ones I hated. 

However, there is one thing that bothered me BUT it does align with their world and that is the lack of accountability certain characters recieve (but I will be talking about that in my Supernova review).

Then the PLOT OH MY GOSH. I mean, it’s superheroes. It’s nearly impossible to be original with a plot that isn’t the same as any Marvel or DC comic/movie/show. And yet Marissa Meyer that such a beautiful job of taking a common conflict (heroes vs villains, villains wanting to take over the world) and turning it into a unique plot with amazing twists. 

I mentioned the world-building before, but I’ll do it again. Third person POV is not my favorite and neither is heavy world building like the one this book needed and had. Still, it was written in such a simple way that I didn’t feel like she was trying to confuse me, it was just a story.

Overall, this series was amazing and I highly recommend it to anyone looking for a fast paced, mind-blowing world building and compelling characters that will make you feel single to the core even in a relationship.

🚨Spoilers Ahead🚨

Renegades ⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️

“We were all villains in the beginning.”

I went into this book with low expectations because I didn’t think I’d like Marissa Meyer’s style and boy was I wrong.

The first few chapters were a bit confusing but the moment Adrian fixed Nova’s bracelet I KNEW this would steer towards romance and it sold me. And then Nightmare making fun of the Sentinel for his comic book phrases and poses was my favorite thing ever. That would be me as a superhero, no doubt.

I really liked the way the plot progressed “slowly” without feeling dragged on. In fact, despite it’s slower pace of the story, the book still felt quick and that just won a million points with me.

Don’t even get me started on the Anarchists. I LOVED them. I like how they weren’t presented as villains from Nova’s POV, just enemies of a totalitarian state. Not even just in her point of view though. I genuinely didn’t think any of them were bad until Ingrid decided to show up at the library and almost killed Sketch’s crew.

And speaking of Sketch’s crew … the minor characters??? Hello??? Who writes side characters that are SO good?? Oscar is my favorite though. He wins. Danna being the only one to question Nova about Adrian’a feelings for her was hilarious, although it stressed me out that Nova put her to sleep. Counterpoint: it was very cute that the only way she could stop thinking of Adrian liking her was by putting Danna to sleep. Very on point teenage reaction. I would’ve done the same thing if only I wasn’t trying to remain anonymous in the organization that indirectly killed my parents. 

The climax, on the other hand, felt a teensy bit rushed but I’d be lying if I said I didn’t enjoy Nodrian in their not-date. It was adorable, especially when they stopped at the kid’s party and then Nova panicking over the mere thought of going on the ferris wheel with Adrian. All the carnival chapters where my favorite thing ever and I really wished they hadn’t ended with Nova killing the woman who raised her. But I did like the irony of it being Ingrid who told her she didn’t have the guts to press the trigger and then she died at the hands of Nova’s gun. 

AND THE ENDING WITH ACE BEING ALIVE. That shook me. I suspected it, of course, but it shook me to my core. 10/10 plot twist there.

Archenemies ⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️

“I guess I figured you deserve to have good dreams every once in a while. Even if you never sleep.”

This one gets six stars because somehow I read it in 11 hours and I’ve never read such a large book in one day. The entire story was just fast-paced action, superhero world building and Nodrian flirting and eventually kissing. Best book ever.

I liked how in this book we got a closer look into other character relationships like Oscar and Ruby and then Danna’s suspicions over Nova. I would’ve liked to see more of Danna’s friendship with the team though, since at times it seemed she was only there to send passive aggressive comments at Nova. And the Sentinel’s “death” was amazing. Pure comic book material right there. 

There is this thing though that I mentioned in the general review that bothered me and it’s when they reveal Agent N. This weapon they created using Max’s blood is a great example of how the Renegades had obtained way too much power. It’s when we start to see that maybe Nova and the Anarchists are right. The Renegades are slowly becoming a dictatorship and it’s bothersome that nobody except Nova and Adrian notice. Especially when it was so obvious with things like them using Agent N “against every prodigy who didn’t follow the Renegades code”. Sure, they were criminals, but that wasn’t about arresting them. It was about changing the DNA of people who made one mistake and were immediately deemed enemies of the state.

Back to the good stuff, Nodrian flirting was the highlight of this book. They’re both so awkward and adorable, especially when Nova’s teaching Adrian how to shoot and then when they’re in his room later on. The whole “you want me to ignore everything?” and “you’re not allowed to have girls in your room?” quotes KILLED me. Those were peak flirting moments and I’m immensely surprised by the way that Marissa Meyer manages to write teenagers realistically as an adult and not even having teenage kids of her own. Also, Nova opening up to Adrian was just. No. It killed me. My ghost is writing this btw.

The ending, once again, amazing. I loved it. Not only did it once again show Frostbite’s true colors, show us how much hate Adrian actually held against Nightmare and the way Nova had softened by the Renegades’ influence. And Ace Anarchy’s capture goes into the good things pile.

Supernova ⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️

“To be honest, I’m not sure there are such things as villains anymore. Maybe there never really were.”

Is it a bad review if I just insert the word “AH” for the next ten lines? Yes? Damn it. I admit that I was expecting something much different, but I enjoyed it nonetheless. I have never cursed and squealed so much by reading and had I not bought the hardcover with my own money, I would’ve thrown that book against the wall. It stressed me out. First of all, getting Nova and Adrian kissing in the tunnels a few chapters before Adrian arrests her for being Nightmare was another level of messed up. Clearly, she did everything in her power to save him from her house’s explosion and he threw it out the window in blind anger. And then the whole execution thing??? That was horrifying and it’s when the Renegades’ incompetence really showed its true colors. They couldn’t bring the people back to their side - because they failed - so they sentenced a broken, dying man and an underage girl who acted under the manipulation of her entire family, to death. If Hugh had ever even attempted to find out what happened to both Artino girls, none of that mess would’ve happened, but instead Lady Indomitable died and he went “WELL, can’t do anything about her last task, can we?” I get he was preoccupied by her orphaned son and the Ace of Anarchy, but it was as simple as going back into the house and searching. In fact, this entire book was just showing how their society was crumbling and in the end they went “we were all heroes”. I’m surprised Nova forgave the entire Renegades organization for what they did because even if it was Ace who sent a hit after her and her family, the Renegades were still willing to overuse their power. 

And once again back to the good stuff before I end up bashing the Renegades even more, I never thought I would be on board with Adrian and Nova’s relationship at the end of the book. I try not to ship toxic relationships in YA because they happen a lot and I wouldn’t like younger readers to think that it’s okay, but I loved how both Nova and Adrian were willing to make a change for their relationship to work. They compromised because they loved each other so much it didn’t matter who had tried to kill the other person and their dad or who hadn’t advocated against the other’s execution, you know, the ups and downs of every relationship. While I do wish we had seen them talking about everything, I get a book can only have a certain amount of words and I was glad just the same with how it ended. Also, Leroy’s threat to Adrian is iconic, just like Oscar proclaiming his undying love for Ruby at the arena were they almost witnessed multiple murders.

The epilogue. Just. Wow. I knew it before because I’m smart and I spoiled it but I NEED another Renegades book. You can’t just end the series saying Evie Artino was Magpie and her being as angry as Nova once was. Like, no. You just can’t. That was a crime against humanity, tbh, but overall the series was amazing and I have never been more grateful to spend almost $80 in books. 

[peter-lurk-ass]

If you feel up to it, what are some of the more common fetishist headcanons you see in fandom? I would like to avoid them in the future and I intend to do my own research, but I'd like to hear your opinions too.

Ooh I always feel up to discussing that, no worries.

I'll try to summarise it concisely; but I wrote an essay on it as well, which I will link at the end. It's mostly focused on yaoi, but it applies to a lot of general fandom stuff. Anyway, here I go:

-Projection of heteronormativity:

Making one of the characters more fem, soft, and more recently nb or even make him a trans guy. But never both. Enforcing typical top/bottom tropes as well (tops being tough men and bottoms uwu soft boys). That actuzlly seems to allow a lot of women to identify with the "bottom" and project themselves onto the gay couple. Will often eventually adopt a child in fetishist's fanwork who is often a little girl(another form of projection) as having a kid is top Heteronormativity goals

-Focus on sexuality: general hypersexualisation

Making the characters' sex lives particularly kinky; ignoring boundaries, writing non-con based on a character's internalised homophobia(he only says no bcse he doesn't realise he's gay, but really he wants sex), A/B/O dynamics: Again hyper focused on sex + Reproduction- Makes the whole dynamic a kink (and also heteronormative as fuck, not to mention transphobic)- Also links gay sex to animalistic behzviour. Not cool. Sex used as a symbol of domination.(frequent dom/sub). Association of shame to gay sex (very shy, bashful character who blushes all the damn time)

-Representation of the characters' sexualities:

The characters will rarely be headcanon'd as gay(often bi, as in, hetero but with an exception for the other character of the ship), or be open about being gay/bi/pan, there will be a focus on internalised homophobia or homophobia in general(violent depictions of it with no cathartic purpose) VS almost no rep/consideration of the characters interacting with their own community. Outright disrespect of canon labels (gay charas made bi, ace made allo ect...) is also frequent. I will add that if a m/m character is represented- and they like him- They can reinterpret his sexuality as straight outside of a specific ship. (AC syndicate had that with Jacob, or DAI with Dorian Pavus)

-Misogyny: homophobia and so fetishism is comorbid with misogyny. (The tropes above would be considered quite misogynistic in a m/f pairing) and as such female characters are too often "fangirls" or "obstacles". The last categories attracting very vicious hatred towzrd said fem character for daring to interfere with the m/m couple. (Ive seen that A LOT)

-General disregard of LGBTIA+ rep, in favour of shipping:

For that one; take a look at the good omens fandom. Consider how many fans have complained about the blatant queerbait.

Very little. I myself left tumblr after a... backlash on the topic. Often fetidhists just don't care about actuzl impact of the work so long as they got their ships and "subtext" (thry will tho, use queerbait to justify harassement when there was none: Klance shippers)

And in general ship wars are a good rep of that; esp between m/m ships. No care for rep at all. Their only issue is with their ships.

I'm not saying all of the tropes above are inherently due to fetishism - But it's important to question why you have those HC about m/m characters, and consider if it could be harmful!

Here's the 'essay' :

[alkhale]

Hello hello miss!... Uh, I think that's how you identify??? If not, please tell me!!! I don't wanna misgender you on accident or something Q-Q Anyways, I've been reading Memo, and I! Really love Hoku, and the way she interacts with the world, and her relationships with everyone, it's just really well written. Plus, she sounds REALLY pretty and I'm weak for that. That aside, are you up for getting ideas for Memo!AUs people've had, or headcanons? If not it's cool, just wanted to ask :> ~ Vira

omg u good, dw anon. 

THANK YOU SO MUCH YOU CUTIE, I FEEL LIKE I SHOULD USE AN uwu WHEN ANSWERING THIS ONE HAHAHAHA. Thank you for loving it and thank you so much!! CALLING HOKU PRETTY IS SO SWEET WHEN SHE PROBABLY JUST LOOKS AT HERSELF LIKE HELL YEAH THAT KIIONOHI WAS WORTH IT. 

I’m guilty of already having a lot of AU ideas for Memos and I might just start a story on AO3 for a collection of them so they don’t clutter the actual story or I can go more in depth or explore some other things hahaha. I’ll start putting them in little omakes and stuff, but Memos chapters have been hella long so I’m worried about overbogging stuff but y’all seem chill with these crazy counts so i hope u don’t mind

AUs:

- School AU, this one’s just fun shenanigans and I love modern AUs. School Council President Sabo, Ace being Ace, Hot teacher Shanks, for some reason Kid and Hoku both have the same art class in basic architecture and metal welding because he’s a grease monkey and Hoku likes designs. Straw Hat crew in school, Brook’s a popular soul musician. Franky and Robin are teachers. 

- MODERN AU. I have so many ideas i wanna hash out for different Modern AUs, hahaha, i’m so attracted to these and was this close to writing it out instead as its own kind of story but Memos won over. 

ASL+Hoku living together and their daily life (together its HASL like hassle and that’s exactly what it’s like with these idiots)

Started to live together once Ace and Sabo were in their third year of high school, it’s been awhile now. (Hoku’s family passed away when she was young, Garp was doing marine work stationed in Hawaii and took an interest in her but before he could find her, she went to live with ‘someone else’ until he managed to shove her in with Luffy, she’s technically an emancipated minor)

Ace is a construction worker/part time fire fighter and picks up all sorts of odd jobs and errand runs.

Whitebeard took him in on several occasions when stuff happened. Ace is super close to the group even though they’re lowkey high profile crime bosses. Marco’s a doctor underground and professional, Thatch is a chef (whitebeard’s crew always sends gifts and visits and hooks them up with deals at random places)

“Ace! Can you call Marco? I think Hoku’s anemic again.”

“I swear to god, put down that phone he’s going to give me all those pills and I don’t wanna pay the hospital bill–”

“But it’s free.”

“God damn it.”

Sabo works for a high fashion brand design/political activist group (somehow these two meshed and Dragon runs both so)

Hoku and Luffy are students almost finishing up with high school. 

Sabo is designated most put-together-has-his-shit-ready, if you can’t find your paint brushes Hoku, ask Sabo. Ace, Sabo put ur laundry away already. He’s usually in charge of meals and making sure the bills get paid. (Their apartment is spacious but a little dingy and random stuff breaks or falls apart but Ace and Hoku are really handy and always fixing shit)

Ace can only make pasta and grilled foods. He’s great with the barbecue. Luffy can’t cook. Hoku cooks pretty damn well but she’s clumsy in the kitchen so she tries to cook before Sabo or Ace get home and they scream something about her cutting off a finger and needing stitches again

House is always decorated with flowers or something nice like a painting or photos or tapestries. Hoku always does that.

They have a small garden plot by the apartment complex. Hoku and Sabo take care of it. Ace and Luffy eat from it a lot and run out animals trying to steal the tangerines from the tree Nami’s adopted mom gave them as a house warming gift.

The three of them fill out a lot of her pages in her sketchbooks and easels. “Is that Sabo again?” “Yeah, he fell asleep reading and he looks too perfect so I wanted to draw it.” “That kinda pisses me off.” “Me too, we’ll do something about it when I finishl.”

Her art classmates are always super eager to see her stuff and ask about the hot older guys in her drawings and please ask them to model. Hoku relents. Ace comes in to model because he gets paid. That’s a story for another day.

Hoku has regular poker nights for awhile now with a group of people Ace and Sabo didn’t think about (they always thought it was the girls or some friends like their friend group) until one night Luffy goes to hang out with the others and they’re like?? Hoku??? and Luffy’s like?? Hoku doesn’t do poker nights with us you dummies.

This sends them into a panic attack and Sabo has Hoku’s location at all times because he did something permanent to her phone (Hoku does not know this) and they visit (stalk) her at one of her poker nights. Find out its in some weirdly shady fancy club body guarded by a bunch of ridiculously macho looking guys (it’s actually Daz, Vergo and some others) They stake out and froth at the mouth, nearly dying when they see Hoku walk out surrounded by GIANT MEN DOUBLE HER SIZE AND AGE, HOKU HONEY, WHAT? It’s Crocodile and Doflamingo, usually Mihawk, and sometimes Jimbei comes.

Hoku’s like ?? I’ve played poker with these guys for forever. (They’re big crime syndicates and totally into illegal business and Sabo knows this and Ace is ready to murder) but apparently Hoku weaseled her way in and she’s a good player so they have fun and like gambling with her. They always suggest taking her to Vegas with them because they’re high rollers but Hoku’s always like nah i got school and work.

Sabo and Ace after herding her home try to convince her to stop meeting with them and Hoku’s just like lmao no and takes out huge wads of cash from her pockets. “They’re ridiculously rich and I win a lot.” They also pay for a lot of good food and Hoku’s not about to pass that up. (She sneaks leftovers for Luffy all the time ((but the older men already know and usually just have shit boxed up for her anyway))) 

“But they’re older men and dangerous!”

“It’s not like I’m going on a date with them. It’s just gambling.”

“You like older men!”

“Oh, yeah, huh.”

Law and Kid are classmates and Luffy and Hoku hang out with them a lot when its not with their crew and Ace and Sabo are always like cant you hang out with better people. Kid and Law never feel welcome in their house but Hoku’s just like dw if they bother u i won’t talk to them and then they get upset and yada yada. Doesn’t stop Ace and Sabo from being super mean looking and scary. Kid and Law are hard to ward off, unfortunately.

Law’s studying to be a doctor, well on the way. Kid’s a mechanic and works at a shop and does street racing. Hoku wants to design a car interior for him.

People always say Sabo seems like the prim and perfect gentlemen of the three and he’ll make a good husband and they just laugh and Hoku tells Koala and she laughs because they always wave their hands and say nah nah, Sabo’s secretly the most sneaky and lowkey scary/sadistic/a tease out of all of them, don’t let the pretty face fool you

(and he really is, sometimes he makes Hoku beg for the pretty cakes he brings home from work from clients because he thinks its cute when she’s trying to reach them over his head)

Shanks is a famous traveler/explorer, always known for doing crazy stuff and his team of explorers climb mountains, explore caves, travel all around the world and take beautiful shots and Hoku and Luffy always tune in. Shanks saved Luffy once from a freak accident and he’s his hero and Hoku has such a hopeless crush on him.

Modern AU where Law is Luffy’s partner in college for a project and he goes to Luffy’s house. Hoku’s a TA for Shanks and stupidly stupid for him and Law meets her and feels things.

Modern AU where Strawhat crew goes on a road trip.

Monsters AU. Hoku’s a ghost.

Hanahaki AU. Red flowers.

Marines AU.

Genderbent AU.

Some other ones but i gotta go finish that essay i mentioned hahaha, hope these were fun! the modern HASL one ran away with me

THANKS FOR LOVING IT

[weneverlearn]

R.I.P. Malcolm Young (AC/DC)

AC/DC (Malcolm Young far left) - swiped from the AllMusic homepage; don’t know the photog, sorry!

Another week, another major musical loss. 

I always loved AC/DC. First heard in the midst of finding my pre-teen “weirdo music” legs in the early-80s, I had the Rolling Stones’ Some Girls as a founding favorite, but wanting to find my own thing and naturally gravitating towards newer shit, I fumbled around with burgeoning synth pop (New Order, the Cure, Heaven 17), and college rock (Marshall Crenshaw, R.E.M., Dream Syndicate). Still love all that stuff. But initially, I turned my nose away from anything that sniffed of Classic Rock. I even needed a little coaxing with Bob Dylan. Then once I quickly found the Ramones, Velvet Underground, and the Stooges (now all classic rock, so...), it was off to the trash rock strata, digging deep until the Saints were my Stones and the Pagans my “classic.” 

But all along, I loved AC/DC from the first time I heard “Dirty Deeds Done Dirt Cheap.” They never sounded like anything but AC/DC. One of those bands, among an extremely exclusive gaggle (Ramones, Rolling Stones, New York Dolls, Public Enemy, um...) who were so instantly locked into their artistically metronomical center, musically and visually, as to seem to have existed since the trilobites. While prematurely lumped into the classic rock canon before their members turned 30, AC/DC were also editorially sucked into the hair metal vacuum of the latter ‘80s, but they never struck me as any of that, even in the about seven-month teenage apex where I decried any and all currently popular musics as “lame.” 

For me, it was their undeniable and “simple” riffs -- constructed by Malcolm Young -- and sense of humor. As rock’n’roll progressed from it’s party start, a sense of humor became incrementally poo-pooed (thanks Sgt. Pepper). As a tween, picking up music mags and being critic-splained that I should respect the production skills of Bread and Yes built in me a strong respect for rockabilly puns, Three Stooges pratfalls, and a minimal amount of chords as life force. (A rockabilly comp was the first album I ever stole.) 

L-R: Angus Young, Malcolm Young (year, photographer unknown)

And yeah, Malcolm’s brother Angus personified all of the AC/DC ethos in a perfect package. But I will be the 3,707,355th person to note today that Malcolm’s riffs held their songs’ heart. But check out any AC/DC video (and my gawd, their videos!) and notice when the cameraman decides to finally focus on Malcolm, he’s either got that mile-wide Young grin going or a delinquent scowl that is of course paraded as parody. Not that they weren’t a bunch of delinquents, but Australian delinquents, hence, drunk and funny. Which could nonetheless manifest itself in actual, deep, hefty anger. Re: those gut-punch riffs or subtle nods to their homeland’s history, like in the amazing video for “Jailbreak” which is, of course, hilarious.

Whatever, fuck. For a band constantly described as “simplistic,” one could go on and on about AC/DC until the bottom shelf is empty. So I’ll just end with this video -- below -- cobbled together by some rabid fan, full of fun, power, and memories. So much in life can just sink us. Like pondering on the fact that Malcolm died due to dementia; and that, god damn I hope he retained some of the millions of fun times he had... It often seems that life tips the scales to awful more than awesome. In fact the “heavy metal” that AC/DC is also mostly lumped into usually leans on the dark end of that equation, which is one reason I don’t like most of that shit either. 

No, AC/DC was AC/DC. Malcolm was tooth-exposing and stein-hoisting riffs. Think of the millions that have occurred because of those riffs, and know that in the lowest moments, Malcolm’s riffs will be there to elbow you in the gut whenever you need them.

[charleshamillton]

Here’s A Craigslist Ad For A C-10 That You Are Not Likely To Soon Forget

People send in Craigslist ads and story ideas to us all the time. And sometimes people send us funny Craigslist ads. Often those funny ads are too “colorful” in the language department to make it. Such is not the case with this one. But, that doesn’t mean it isn’t funny as hell. The person writing this one is great and we love it. The truck? Not so much. The ad, hell yes. Read this. It is worth the time.

Here is the text from the original ad. CLICK HERE TO VISIT THE AD AND CONTACT THE SELLER

You want a truck that everyone will compliment you on? Well look no further – me 1970 C-10.

Let’s talk about features;

Bluetooth: nope Sunroof: nope 350cid Chevy small block Newer Edlebrock 1406 carb Newer dual exhaust Bitchin’ radio with USB input: yes Fancy wheels: nope Rear view camera: nope… it’s got a transparent rear window and you have a neck that turns.

Let me tell you a story. One day my truck started making a strange sound. I turned up the radio and ignored it. It went away. The End. You could take the Chevy 350 out of this car, drop it off the Mendota Bridge into the Minnesota River, fish it out of the water a thousand years later, put it back in the car, fill the gas tank up with Nutella, turn the key, and this puppy would start right up. This truck will outlive you, it will outlive your children.

Things this truck is old enough to do: Vote: yes Consent to sex: yes Run for President

This truck’s got history. It’s seen some stuff. It’s not going to judge you like a damn Ford or Dodge would. Interesting facts: This car’s exterior color is white, it’s interior is torn and covered with a crappy old seat cover that should be replaced… In the owner’s manual, oil is listed as “optional.”

When this car was unveiled at the 1967 Detroit Auto Show, it caused all 2,000 attendees to spontaneously catch fire. The resulting abrupt change in air pressure inside the building caused a partial collapse of the roof. Four people died. The event is chronicled in the documentary “The New Chevy C-10: The Truck that Runs Forever”

You wanna know more? Great, I had my truck fill out a Facebook survey. Favorite food: Cheeseburgers Favorite tv show: The Rockford Files Favorite band: tie between AC/DC and Foghat

This truck is as practical as a Roth IRA. It’s as utilitarian as a truck can be. When I ran the CarFax for this truck, I got back a single piece of paper that said, “It’s a C-10. It’s fine.” Let’s face the facts, this truck isn’t going to win any beauty contests, but neither are you. Stop lying to yourself and stop lying to your wife. This isn’t the truck you want, it’s the truck you deserve: The 1970 Chevrolet C-10.

This truck has very little rust underneath – you can crawl under and look for yourself. There is rust on the passenger rocker and fender – both easy fixes. This truck is ripe for a restoration or even better a resto-mod!

Comes with collector plates, transfer them to yourself and never pay the government for plates again!

Come take a look for yourself.

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[dearyallfrommatt]

  “Snoop vs. The Red Baron” by the Royal Guardsman, 1966

This has always been one of the goddamnedest things I’ve ever seen. The Beatles are responsible for this, you know. Before Bob Dylan got them stoned, they were a teeny-bopper group, you know. They weren’t The Most Influential Band In Rock Music just yet. At the time, they’d be considered just another silly group of boys who need haircuts singing silly songs for the teenagers to dance their silly dances. That and Beatles-esque vocal harmonies, which at the time was the only thing musically people gave a shit about the band. Throw that at every wanna-be rock & roll band and you get stuff like this.

  These guys were from Ocala, FL, and were originally known as The Posmen, whatever the hell that means. As history tells us, on Feb. 7, 1064, the Beatles came from across the sea to bring us rock & roll and save us from the pre-packaged kid’s stuff media-made teen idols. What it really meant is the Beatles made it okay for white dudes playing music and, in the process, get laid to like the girl groups like the Ronnettes or R&B/blues music like Bo Diddley. It was all a matter of gimmick, what fresh new thing you brought to the scene.

 Like the Sir Douglas Quintet, the newly christened Royal Guardsman choose their sound and look - or had their manager/record label change their sound and look, more like. Like Sam The Sham & The Pharaohs, they had a gimmick they built their entire image around. To wit, this goofy ass song. It got to Number 2 on the Billboard Hot 100 1966 and spent 12 weeks on the charts, even reaching gold in 1967.

 They did not ask Charles M. Schultz for permission to use Snoopy. Things being a bit looser then and the hustle was on, this didn’t cause the song or the band any problem until they tried to release the song in Canada. Eventually, the Peanuts creator gave the label, Laurie, his permission and the band found their gimmick, Snoopy’s imaginary fights with the Red Baron in World War One. Accuracy be damn, because it’s only a comic strip and it’s only rock & roll.

 As an aside, there was a whole lot of Peanuts-related media that Sparky had nothing to do with but because United Feature Syndicate was cutting him his check, he had little to say in the matter and so no money. There was a very weird and often disturbing comic book that UFS has gone out of it’s way to eradicate any record of its existence. I’ve been searching the net off and on all evening, and come up with nothing. It’s entirely possible I made it up, but that’d mean I’d made up exactly one conversation with someone who knew about the creation and that’s stretching.

 Anyway.

 Like most of these bands, these guys were competent if not particularly interesting. Solid bar band, playing the same mixture of the then current teen hits and collection of stuff black people did first with maybe a country song or two. Because of the state of technology, cutting a single and getting it on the radio was happening in little rinky-dink studios/garage/music club/former barber shop/current barber shop all over the land. While they rarely made impact on the charts - and remember, back then it was mainly the Pop charts if you mattered at all, that’s just how it was - these guys shaped the course of rock music.

 Their original manager and guy who helped the band shape it’s look/sound was Leonard Stogel. He managed groups like Tommy James & The Shondells and the Cowsills, which is where the pop comes in, and Sam The Sham and Napoleon XIV, from whence came the goofy. Guy spent the ‘70s managing acts like Redbone and Gentle Giant, so who knows. He died in a plane crash in 1979, and the world lost a truly unique ear.

 In any event, this gimmick didn’t do the Royal Guardsman too much after the initial hit but they still squeezed it for all it’s worth, with a number of Snoopy-based songs like “Snoopy’s Christmas,” a number one hit in Australia and New Zealand, and albums like Snoopy For President or Snoopy & His Friends The Royal Guardsmen, with covers of Johnny Horton and Bo Diddley, the occasional stab at the latest similarly goofy bullet like “Alley-Oop” or a Byrds cover, and the odd original.

 Long known mainly to Dr. Demento fans and hardcore Peanuts geeks (which exist), the band made a... comeback of sorts in 2006 with “Snoopy vs. Osama,” which I am just not going to look up. They still play around Ocala occasional, so good for them.

 You don’t really see this much anymore in mainstream pop or rock music, this sort of goofball rock & roll clown take on playing in the band. Can’t you just see these guys in an abandoned mansion being chased by a werewolf or something? To be honest, I am completely unhip to what the kids, the actual teenagers rock & roll music was original marketed to and created for, listen to nowadays. The only ones I know well are my cousin’s kids, and she keeps their music on a tight leash. I do know the stuff that calls itself rock & roll nowadays probably would cut song like this and any covers would be stinking of irony.

 So take it all with a grain of salt. Maybe the rest of the Teenage Wasteland will be as incomprehensible to me as the online population is and that’s the nature of the world. Still, all things considered, I believe we can come together and enjoy a goofy Beatle-esque song by a handful of dopey Florida crackers about a comic strip dog meeting Imperial Germany's Number One Flying Ace in mortal combat in one of the horrifically bloodiest wars of a particularly nasty century.

 I think it can be done.